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Ayahuasca

Who’s used it and what was your experience like?

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by Anonymousreply 3748 hours ago

Quick reference.

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by Anonymousreply 103/22/2021

The Great Vegetative Mother, in every cell, in every thought; She is the air itself, which is also your stomach and spine which hold the history of all humans all in one sacred and humorless Truth that walks you through to the End. The Holy Shadow is heard. The Endless Night is grown. The First Cause will demand much of you with the answers falling endlessly into your skull.

Again.

by Anonymousreply 203/22/2021

R2 So, you’ve partaken?

by Anonymousreply 303/22/2021

Well, I finally could say I'd been to me - and it was hideous.

by Anonymousreply 403/22/2021

It's all about San Pedro cactus.

by Anonymousreply 503/22/2021

I ordered some San pedro cactus seeds. They didn't grow. It seems like 100x steps to grow any life changing drug.

Maybe I can lick a toad.

by Anonymousreply 603/22/2021

You can buy the cactus online.

by Anonymousreply 703/22/2021

I had it at a place near Cuzco. It tastes like very thick soy sauce with ashes mixed in. Will write more later, but the first experience, with a rather small dose, was better than subsequent experiences days after with more of it.

by Anonymousreply 803/22/2021

Wonderful place. Doctor, nurse, psychologist on staff for your safety.

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by Anonymousreply 903/22/2021

Is it legal to partake?

by Anonymousreply 1003/22/2021

Legal in Peru.

by Anonymousreply 1103/22/2021

Only legal in one country?! r11 Are they dangerous ,damaging or easy to overdose on?

by Anonymousreply 1203/22/2021

I've done four trips to Peru. Changed my life forever, for the better. I also microdose mushrooms and go on macrodose trips a few times a year, too. Got rid of antidepressants and therapists and dark moods ever since. I'll never go back to western big pharma bullshit.

by Anonymousreply 1303/22/2021

I've had two breakthrough trips on DMT. It is the most intense experience I've ever had, and affected me in positive ways for moths afterward. It was as if my mind's "cache" had been cleared.

I would love to try ayahuasca someday.

by Anonymousreply 1403/22/2021

I look forward to reading about your experiences, R8.

by Anonymousreply 1503/22/2021

R13 Please share more.

by Anonymousreply 1603/22/2021

R15, will do. R14's cache-cleaning captures a bit of what I experienced.

by Anonymousreply 1703/22/2021

R14 Tell us more!

by Anonymousreply 1803/22/2021

I really want to try it. But it's meant to be particularly good if you have some past unresolved trauma that you want to address, and that doesn't really apply to me - I'm pretty happy to be honest so I'm not sure how transformative it would be.

by Anonymousreply 1903/23/2021

I read this as “Anastacia”. I need coffee. LOL

by Anonymousreply 2003/23/2021

R19 It could retraumatize you if you’re not properly guided. Ayahuasca is no joke.

by Anonymousreply 2103/23/2021

Here' s a link with several documentaries about Ayahuasca that are helpful.

Another documentary that is annoying, amusing, and sad... about a privileged prep school kid with rich doctor parents, who went to South America to live a live of ayahuasca apprenticeship to find hearing. The Shaman eventually migrated to the big city to work in a factory. So much for paradise and it's chemical entry tickets.

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by Anonymousreply 2203/23/2021

Use of San Pedro cactus is what may have kick-started some of the great, complex civilizations down in Peru.

by Anonymousreply 2303/23/2021

R23 Did you mean "kicked down", that is destroyed, or "kick started, there down in Peru"?

Here's the documentary about the Philips-Andover kid who sought ayahuasca to stop trying to kill himself:

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by Anonymousreply 2403/23/2021

A friend of mine did ayahuasca and stuck two butter knives into her eye sockets because she no longer needed eyes to see!

by Anonymousreply 2503/23/2021

R25 I know Officer Bob. Give him a few 'shrooms and he squeals like a banshee when his prostate gets hit.

by Anonymousreply 2603/23/2021

R24: That poster makes him look like he has a very ugly boil on his cheek.

by Anonymousreply 2703/23/2021

R24 I never was able to finish that doc; it irritated me for some reason. Is it worth revisiting and finishing?

by Anonymousreply 2803/23/2021

R28 Yeah, it was extremely annoying - the young prep school kid creating a whole narrative about his suffering, with the hoped for "breakthrough" of his psychic/chemical vision quest... and the production process for the film was so calculating. But things went off the rails... unexpected endings. Life interrupted the pre-conceptions. Worth seeing the end.

by Anonymousreply 2903/23/2021

Is this the stuff that reveals The Machine Elves?

by Anonymousreply 3003/23/2021

R24, I meant like a jump-start. Just a theory, but there's evidence that use of San Pedro was a common link amongst the Andean civilizations. In other words, some of those ancient people were definitely trippin' balls!

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by Anonymousreply 3103/23/2021

R31 They also chewed coca leaves all the time, so there's that. They had a lot of energy for "development" of a culture.

by Anonymousreply 3203/23/2021

R30, yes.

R8 here. Here's what happened, as far as I can recall:

You go into the huge hut with everyone else, and you get a mat and blanket to lie on. They prepare the drink and do a small ceremony during its preparation. You get it in small cups, with the amount determined beforehand while meeting with the psychologist, nurse, and shaman.

It tastes terrible - like I said, very thick soy sauce with ashes. The worst thing I've ever tasted.

Everyone takes it and lies down on their mats about 8 feet apart. You can hear dogs howling in the distance. They turn off the lights. The shaman burns tobacco and makes the room smokey (didn't like that) and chants on and off for long periods each time, though it's quiet after a few hours.

The entire experience is ... six hours? Something like that.

During the first hour, you're just lying there. Some people are throwing up, and others already have started experiencing stuff, but that's rare.

After the first hour, things should start happening.

Here's what happened with me the first night:

My eyes were closed but 1 or 2 hours in I could see something like an opaque greenhouse roof, but very crystalline and moving - green, white, gray. Just kind of moving with crystal panels moving this and that way, like huge gears with something that springy clock-gear movement. Or something.

Then I saw sparks (eyes closed) and it was like "working" on my brain to fix it. Then I heard something like "OK, we've done what we can, see you, you'll go on to experience other things now!"

Then I lay there for another hour, then my body started moving by itself and I was laughing. I could hear people vomiting and being attended to by the nurse and assistant. It's cold now because it's, what 11 PM?

(Other people were there to "see stuff" but I was there because I had depression. They definitely saw stuff, but I didn't really except that greenhouse-made-of-crystalline-gears thing.)

I'll write what happened next later (when my body started moving by itself). Gotta work again.

by Anonymousreply 3303/23/2021

R29 Thanks for letting me know. I might throw it back on while completing menial work.

by Anonymousreply 3403/23/2021

What are The Machine Elves?

Are they real?

by Anonymousreply 3503/23/2021

R35, here.

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by Anonymousreply 3603/23/2021

The Google Images results for "machine elves" are terrifying.

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by Anonymousreply 3703/23/2021

I did a bunch of acid and mushrooms in my late teens and twenties. I'm 42 now and think I'd like to do ayahuasca around my 50th, just for the ceremony of making it to half a century. Do you have to fly to Peru to do it?

by Anonymousreply 3803/23/2021

R38, I would. Etnikas at R9 is excellent, in my opinion. Very safe and respectful to the native traditions.

by Anonymousreply 3903/23/2021

R38, it's legal in Ecuador for ritual/ceremonial purposes, as well. But given the choice between traveling to Ecuador or Peru, I'd choose Peru.

by Anonymousreply 4003/23/2021

Go online and buy one for your...garden...cough...

by Anonymousreply 4103/23/2021

This song was based on a Ayahuasca trip - it also inspired her third album, “Boys for Pele” - Amos underwent.

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by Anonymousreply 4203/23/2021

What does ayahuasca taste like?

by Anonymousreply 4303/23/2021

R43 Verdant cunt.

by Anonymousreply 4403/23/2021

It is horribe - you get violently ill and it's pretty much the same as an acid trip. Do some shrooms.

by Anonymousreply 4503/23/2021

Acid is sparkly, eclectic, sharp edges, fast, light, transparent, air and fire.

Ayahuasca is rooted, deepening, timeless, dark and corrective, opaque, earth and water.

by Anonymousreply 4603/23/2021

R46 You keep teasing us, granddaddy!

by Anonymousreply 4703/23/2021

Has anyone tried DMT and broken through?

That's the one where you see God. Supposedly the most powerful one of all.

by Anonymousreply 4803/23/2021

On these trips do you really feel like reality there is more real and you've been there for years?

by Anonymousreply 4903/23/2021

As long as we are sharing our curiosity, and data from experiments, sex on acid is possible and even remarkable. I don't think sex on ayahuasca is possible (beyond the vomit and the soiled diapers). Any reports or opinions?

by Anonymousreply 5003/23/2021

R48 DMT is the main engine of ayahuasca.

by Anonymousreply 5103/23/2021

R43, foul and bitter.

by Anonymousreply 5203/23/2021

It wipes away bad AND good memories so be careful.

by Anonymousreply 5303/23/2021

R53 Explain! You bitches are just teasing us with hints about these trips when you should be regaling us with details of your experiences!

by Anonymousreply 5403/23/2021

Micro-dosing. The future of our mental health and consciousness caretaking.

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by Anonymousreply 5503/23/2021

I would love to go to Peru for this experience. But I’m fat, have high blood pressure (a no no from what I’ve read- I think because of the altitude) AND I’m on a few psych meds.

I’m afraid of giving up meds for the detox prep, only to be rejected for my bp.

I do vicariously enjoy the accounts here though.

by Anonymousreply 5603/23/2021

All the repetitive memories that your mind skips to involuntarily at the weirdest of moments will not trouble you anymore. It's a reset. But be sure you want it.

by Anonymousreply 5703/23/2021

R56 Aw! I swear, your post makes me want to hug and kiss you on the cheek.

by Anonymousreply 5803/23/2021

I've heard mostly great things about it. But also scared because one acquaintance said it's opening a door you can't close again.

by Anonymousreply 5903/23/2021

Wachuma San Pedro looks wild

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by Anonymousreply 6003/24/2021

I took when I was touring the Amazon with a group of Americans and Europeans and some Brazilians and Bolivians.

The stories in the group varied from people talking to angels and ET races to people vomiting their ass off and "cleansing" oneself.

I talked to some ETS that told me they'd massively appear on the skies across the world in the next 5 years, no joke, that's the experience I had.

I've had many conversations like that afterwards. it does open a door...

by Anonymousreply 6103/24/2021

on my bucket list

by Anonymousreply 6203/24/2021

R60, San Pedro Cactus is mother nature's MDMA, very positive and empathetic

by Anonymousreply 6303/24/2021

R61 What year...?

by Anonymousreply 6403/24/2021

I haven't used Ayahuasca, but I have used DMT (main active ingredient in it) on three occasions.

Not for the faint of heart, but I am very glad I did it.

by Anonymousreply 6503/24/2021

R33/R8/R9 here.

So when I started moving by myself, my arms were going everywhere, raising by themselves, massaging each of their respective shoulders (right hand just bending towards right shoulder, left to left) accompanied by the message "see you can comfort yourself". Very strange. Then my mind split into multiple voices: 1. confused depressed me, 2) a trickster, 3. a godlike voice who explained things, whom I was compelled to believe (I had no choice; actually, I was quite servile to the voice, and just agreed along, and in agreeing it somehow made perfect sense).

The trickster tried a few times to say "This is pointless and silly; it's not going to work" but somehow confused depressed me was able to ignore him and I think maybe say "Whatever - go away". Eventually the trickster went away and it was just the godlike authority and me.

More later.

by Anonymousreply 6603/24/2021

It causes you to give up a successful career on a daytime soap to pursue a multi year journey of spiritual enlightenment.

by Anonymousreply 6703/24/2021

Excuse for 40 and 50 somethings to trip again.

by Anonymousreply 6803/24/2021

R66 Are you sure the trickster trickster isn’t talking to you know because you’re definitely playing with us, daddy!

by Anonymousreply 6903/24/2021

Ayhuasca is legal in all South American countries. Some countries restrict its usage to religious group, but most groups will accept foreigners or outsiders to partake for a fee, that's how they keep it running.

Source: took it in many different countries legally.

[quote] [R61] What year...?

This talk was in 2017, it was addressing 2019-2022.

by Anonymousreply 7003/24/2021

[quote] I really want to try it. But it's meant to be particularly good if you have some past unresolved trauma that you want to address, and that doesn't really apply to me -

You're wrong. As mentioned above, i've taken it many times and I had no major trauma to address, I had a very happy and loving childhood and great parents and siblings.

My trips were very fun and filled with lots of laughter and joy. You don't need to be in a dark place for this to change you.

by Anonymousreply 7103/24/2021

[quote] It could retraumatize you if you’re not properly guided. Ayahuasca is no joke.

Same could happen on a Zoom call. Stop terrorizing people with mindless stupidity, you sound like a church lady warning about tarot cards.

Most groups, specially in Brazil and Bolivia vet everyone. You can't take it if you're under deep depression or if you're taking some kinds of anti depressants.

by Anonymousreply 7203/24/2021

[quote] They also chewed coca leaves all the time, so there's that. They had a lot of energy for "development" of a culture.

If you knew anything about chemistry, you'd know coca leaves are extremely beneficial, it doesn't turn into a problem until it's refined into a powder.

My God some posters here are so idiotic I can't even...

by Anonymousreply 7303/24/2021

[quote] It is horribe - you get violently ill and it's pretty much the same as an acid trip. Do some shrooms.

BS. Stop lying.

by Anonymousreply 7403/24/2021

The biggest difference between Ayahuasca and many other plants and drugs is that even though the trip could be wild, if you open your eyes you're back to reality.

A friend of mine never had a trip on it. Took it many times. So this terrorizing fantasy that it can fuck you up blah blah sounds like old people in a nursing home talking about Elvis and his threat to music back in the day.

by Anonymousreply 7503/24/2021

R73, I don't get where that poster said anything about it being a problem. He said chewing coca leaves gives energy -- and it does.

by Anonymousreply 7603/24/2021

Coca leaves unprocessed are harmless. You just put them in hot water and it's like mildly caffieinated tea. They have them at every hotel in Cuzco.

by Anonymousreply 7703/24/2021

R77, yep -- they help with altitude sickness as well, and if you are in Cuzco, you will need time to acclimate to that crazy altitude.

by Anonymousreply 7803/24/2021

R72 Bitch, you just proved my point..

by Anonymousreply 7903/24/2021

Detailed documentary shows the preparation, the effect, and associated rituals.

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by Anonymousreply 8003/24/2021

How long does the high last? I'm very curious about trying this.

by Anonymousreply 8103/24/2021

R73 Clearly you read something the original post that you wanted to see.... to provide you an opportunity to complain. Nothing in the original post said that chewing coca leaves was wrong or anything remotely like (I suppose you want to say) free basing cocaine.

Chewing coca leaves both helps adapt to very high elevations AND gives you a bit of energy, hence the assistance to develop great civilizations.

by Anonymousreply 8203/24/2021

Documentary portrays several Westerners going thru the experience in great detail, explaining their motivations and the result.

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by Anonymousreply 8303/24/2021

'But also scared because one acquaintance said it's opening a door you can't close again.'

More like closing a door you can't open again.

by Anonymousreply 8403/24/2021

I have taken it five or six times and it changed my perception of life and permanently ended my lifelong suicidal ideation. It completely transformed me.

I have written a lot about it on this site, including in this thread I started a while back.

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by Anonymousreply 8503/24/2021

R8/R66 here. I have a particular cause I want to leave all my money to. I don't want to name it here. The authority voice ("he") was explaining that I just need to focus on that, and even if what I leave to the cause helps the cause just 1 mm out of a million miles to its goal, that's enough.

He said I might come back after death in another form, and he showed me that I might become an ocean animal, way down deep in the ocean, where he took me very briefly, showing me the world through a fish's eyes. The water felt heavy. He said don't be scared of death. He was slapping my face by making me slap my own face gently in a friendly "boy, don't you get it?!" way. I was nodding and laughing throughout in an "Omg why didn't I realize this before?!" way. I was quite the kiss-ass towards the authority voice.

He helped me with my sexual problems — obsession, distracting sexual desire, etc. He said I can put all of that in this glass cube he "gave" me. He said put it on the nightstand and call it [a male name I won't put here -let's say John]. He said I can visit John whenever I want (porn, mastubation, escorts, etc.), but I can safely and with confidence compartmentalize my sexual desire in ways that don't make it a distraction from my goal of earning money for my cause.

What else ... I'll look through my notes, which I took when my body automatically walked me to my room. It was moving my arms about 80% to write the notes. I have to dig them up.

But that was the first ceremony. Two more followed and sucked because I had too much ayahuasca those two things. Will explain those later.

Re the cache reset someone mentioned above, I experienced something like that in that, before, I would instantly cry whenever I thought about the cause I'm dedicated to - the victims of what I'm dedicating my life's earnings fighting. I was able to control that after "la medicina": I can cry anytime when I think about the victims now, but it's a choice now. It felt like a lot was cleared up and reset. I felt really good the morning after, and carried a sense of peace for a while even after I got home.

I said I'd never do it again after the second and third ceremonies, but now that I've thought about it again, I'm tempted to at least consider going again, perhaps for just one or two ceremonies, two days apart. The shaman was a very lovely kind old woman. I remember her and have a picture with her. They rescue dogs there, too, and I loved this sweet black dog there who has a messed-up front leg from being hit by a car and never having had the bone reset. I love him and I remember his name and have pictures of him. I hope he's still doing OK.

by Anonymousreply 8603/24/2021

Oh and the hotel I stayed at for two nights before the retreat started (to adapt to the altitude and just get settled) was very decent — a good value — and the staff were very kind as well. If anyone wants the name, I can dig it up.

by Anonymousreply 8703/24/2021

So the cause is about abused animals or children? What are they victims of?

by Anonymousreply 8803/24/2021

Thanks, R85!

by Anonymousreply 8903/24/2021

R88 Don’t be pushy, Rose.

by Anonymousreply 9003/24/2021

Dear Lord in Heaven!

by Anonymousreply 9103/24/2021

Again this was the excellent place I went to near Cuzco. Stayed in Cuzco 2 nights to adjust to the altitude (coca leaf tea helped), then went to their in-town clinic for health checks (blood pressure) and a required cleans (volcanic water with salt, to flush out the system; tedious but not embarrassing: everyone had to do it, and all the intakes where there).

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by Anonymousreply 9203/25/2021

And here's the excellent, great-value hotel.

Tierra Viva Cusco Centro

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by Anonymousreply 9303/25/2021

R85 here. I am on my computer now instead of my phone, and so I can type more readily and will share a little bit of detail, since I see a variety of comments above that match and depart a bit from my experiences.

I'll post a separate comment for each of a few different notable experiences. This will be about my first experience.

The first time I took ayahuasca, I very little of the desired effect, but there were effects. I drank it, gagged on it, felt disgusted. After 15-20 minutes, I would get a strange sensation that my body was riding a swell of water, on and off. I found it interesting. My leg began to visibly twitch, and the twitch moved up my leg, and that freaked me out. It made me feel like some kind of parasitic creature was crawling around inside me. But it wasn't really that big a deal. I noticed that a digital light had a trailing effect when I moved my head, and I became afraid of impending hallucinations because I had never taken any kind of (non-psychiatrist prescribed) mind-altering substance before.

So then I began to panic, worried about what I was in for and if I had made a mistake. I regretted it, even though I had spent 18 months researching both scientific literature and personal experiences about it and had a good idea of what to expect. I had read countless times that "set and setting" matter, and I knew my mindset was resisting and that that was not good. It wasn't good.

I had a sudden flash of panic, for no good reason thinking an airplane was going to crash in my direction. I knew it was crazy, but I couldn't get it out of my mind. I became obsessively worried about it and I felt like I was going to die.

Eventually (hours), I calmed down and lie down to try to sleep it off. I kind of slept. I waited eagerly for the "light show" and there was none. I saw the faintest little green spots in mosaic-like swirls moving slowly, but that was it. And I thought, "of course I would fail at a psychedelic experience. I'm such a freak." (I was very ill at the time, very depressed and also drank a lot. This will come into play through later experiences.)

I fell asleep and dreamed that I was moving in a strange way through a dense, dark sort of medium. It was really weird. I was just sort of pushing my way through it. It took some effort, but it was comfortable to be surrounded by such a dense atmosphere and I felt safe. Out of nowhere, I thought "WORM" and then I realized I had the vantage point of a worm crawling through soil. It freaked me out and I realized I wasn't asleep at all. My heart raced. It continued for a while and I calmed down and started thinking, "this is so interesting. Isn't this nice? I'll never think of a worm the same way again. I wonder if living beings can project themselves into other living beings and gain their experiences?" I thought things like that, and then I woke up in the morning, having fallen asleep at some point.

I was shocked that I didn't feel hung over or any effect at all. Actually, I woke up completely refreshed feeling and I told myself I was insane for having never taken any mind-altering substance before and then taking one of the most potent psychedelics known. I swore I would never do it again. I had learned my lesson.

by Anonymousreply 9403/25/2021

My second experience:

As the day went on, I debated with myself. I had spent so long reading about ayahuasca and I really did know what to expect, including the backlash from fighting its effects. I was disappointed in myself.

That evening, I decided to try it again. This time, I felt EXTREMELY humbled and respectful of ayahuasca, and I did what seemed silly to me before this experience: I meditated on my intentions before I did it. I wanted to stop being so ill, but that was magical thinking to expect it to heal me. If I couldn't heal, and if whatever was wrong with me was indeed breaking down my body as it seemed to be doing, then I wanted to find a way to make peace with it. I definitively wanted to break my drinking compulsion. I was drinking a hell of a lot more than I was comfortable doing, and throughout the work day, I would look forward to going home and having a drink. (More than one.) So those were my intentions. I drank it.

The same things happened again--the twitching, the "riding a wave" feeling, of course the nauseousness. Oh, I forgot to mention: yes, it makes you purge. It doesn't make me throw up, though; it gives me explosive diarrhea. I didn't look forward to it but I had been through it the night before. This time, after I purged, I realized how lightening it felt. It was really a good feeling, and that reassured me.

I didn't have a panic attack. I didn't have any visual hallucinations of the sort I expected--colorful, geometric--with my eyes closed or open.

I lay down again and just decided to surrender to it and let whatever was going to happen happen.

I could write way too much about it and so I will summarize.

I "heard a voice" in my mind, and I debated whether it was indeed "a voice." It was more like a thought, but not my thought. The only sufficient way to describe it would be telepathic communication--some other entity entering my mind and communicating with me without language, but clearly. It provoked me to ask personal questions about myself, to sort of take an inventory of my behaviors and motivations. At the same time, as someone described above, my body felt like it was being "inspected" physically. This was really weird but not at all uncomfortable. My foot wiggled and moved around. Then my lower leg, then my whole leg. My hips gyrated. I thought "what the fuck?" I could stop it and control myself at any time, which was very reassuring. I could open my eyes at any time and just see the space around me, which was very reassuring. So I would relax again, and the physical inspection would continue. My torso would lift and then fall, lift and fall, lift and fall. Then my fingers would wiggle, my hand would move at the wrist, my arm, my shoulder, my neck--and then what happened really did freak me out. My eyes started opening and closing, my jaw did the same, and then the right side of my nose started running spontaneously and my right eye was tearing. I had been tracking it all but when this happened, I realized it wasn't my subconscious controlling my body and really felt like someone else was sharing control of my body. Then all the same stuff on the left side, including the left nostril and left eye running.

That ended and I was subsumed into some other state of being. It was not "psychedelic" in the visual sense we expect. But I was asking all these questions. Just one example: (my voice) You said you wanted to stop drinking. Why are you drinking so much? I don't know. [it's voice: Yes you do.] I...don't know. [Yes.] I do it...I don't know. I don't want to, but I started doing it when I moved into the city and it seems to be the only social activity. [Yes. And.] I think that's it. [No.]

This went on and on and my head started nodding or shaking with affirmative or negative responses from "that voice."

I really felt like someone had inhabited my body and my mind. It felt feminine, like a grandmotherly type of personality, very direct and uncompromising but also very loving and supportive. And I can't explain this, but it also felt like it "poked" me sometimes.

by Anonymousreply 9503/25/2021

R95 Cont.

It felt like it had a sense of humor, which is maybe the weirdest thing about it to me.

Anyway, this Q&A process went on and on and I got a lot of answers through the interrogation.

And when the answers came, they were so genuine and coming directly from the deepest and most honest part of me that there's no way ever to get away from them.

This was the bulk of this experience. I had a drink the next day, and with the first sip, I was as nauseated as I had been from taking ayahuasca. I almost threw up. I kept drinking. I also kept hearing that voice saying, "Why are you poisoning yourself?" I stopped drinking after that one drink. I have not had a drink alone since that time, not because I avoid doing it but because I don't want to. The most I've had in social situations since then is two drinks, but I feel so sick while I am drinking now that I actually don't want to do it.

I think this happened around 2012 or 2013.

These are exhaustive, I know. I will post only two more.

by Anonymousreply 9603/25/2021

The third time I took ayauasca, everything that happened the second time happened again. It was becoming comfortable and fascinating.

Phase 1: Purging

Phase 2: Physical inspection

Phase 3: Interrogation

Phase 4 was new. I felt like I was in some other kind of space that I can't really describe, and there, I was witnessing and simultaneously re-experiencing some upsetting events from my life. I didn't want to, and the ayahuasca somehow "held my hand" psychically and directed me to look at it and to go through it. All the while, it felt like I was being embraced and I felt totally safe. Instead of feeling victimized or injured, I related to people that were doing terrible things to me, and I felt so much love for them. I was only being hurt by what I felt motivating them. That was it. I cried so much during this process.

Eventually, I felt like I was in a really tight, confined space, and I realized that I had wrapped myself up tightly in my blanket like a cocoon, and I began pushing at it and stretching it from inside. I thought that I should get out of it so that I could breathe, but I felt so warm and comfortable that I didn't want to open up the blanket. I kept stretching at the sides and thought that I would have to get out of it because it was becoming so uncomfortable, but it was so warm and the air outside was going to be almost painful. And then just as I had thought WORM during that first experience, I thought WOMB, and I was like HOLY FUCK AM I RELIVING BEING IN THE WOMB? THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING. The feeling was *the most blissful and comfortable* I ever remember feeling, though.

At some point, I felt my arms and legs pressing down really hard and I noticed how heavy my body felt. And it got heavier and heavier, like one of those gravitron centrifugal force rides. I liked the feeling for quite a while and then it became so heavy that I felt like stones were being piled on my chest and I struggled to breathe. I remembered to just let it happen and not struggle against it. But eventually I was really gasping for breath and thought I might suffocate. The heaviness continued beyond what I thought I could take, and then I felt this CRACK and an explosion from the center of my chest. It felt physically like my chest had exploded open, and I launched from my body into space. I mean, it seems totally silly to write this out, but I was out in space, weightless, and it was completely dark except shimmering lights and I was being propelled amid them as if I were swimming. They looked alive, like plankton swimming and free floating in the ocean, and I was moving at a breakneck speed, faster and faster and faster.

I saw a bright light from the corner of my vision. I should say I felt the light more than I saw it. It was so warm, so comfortable, and beyond comfortable. It really felt divine. I was in absolute awe and I tried to get a better view of it and it just moved slowly into my field of vision and I was absolutely awestruck and I wondered if that was "the light" or "heaven" or something and I affirmed that I never wanted to be out of its presence and wanted to be closer to it.

And then at some point, my eyes popped open and I couldn't go back. It was over.

by Anonymousreply 9703/25/2021

Fifth and final experience. This time I did it several years later because my father was about to have a potentially life-threatening surgery and I was terrified, and I did it with a set intention of hoping to realize that life does not end with death, and hoping, if it were at all possible, to meet deceased family members through it. I didn't expect that to happen, but I was terrified of losing my father and I had always found solace in ayahuasca (except that first time...).

Steps 1, 2, and 3 all happened, as they reliably did. I was comfortable, but honestly, the moving of my limbs tired me out and felt tedious because I was anxious to get t the meaningful parts.

This time, I saw sudden flashes of neon-green pluses and opened my eyes in surprise. They were there, too, with my eyes opened. I opened and closed my eyes and realized I was finally having those classic DMT visuals I had never seen, and I was completely shocked and thrown off. The images looked exactly like Shipibo ayahuasca depictions, but they were moving/shifting at a hyperspeed that was completely overwhelming. And there was nothing the least bit organic about them. They felt electrical. I did not like it. I opened my eyes to get away from it but there was no getting away. The visuals were the same with eyes open and closed, and open was far worse because the visions were seen over real objects and I couldn't make sense of it. I worried I might be schizophrenic forever. And I realized I was resisting, the wrong thing to do, and tried to talk myself out of it.

But then there was no more "this reality." There were only the visions. I was lying down and a quiet buzzing not unlike the tinnitus I always have in my left ear became louder and louder and louder until it was deafening. And then it was all shapes moving in a way that sickened me at a pace that sickened me. Then this heavy rainbow stream of light pounded into my forehead from somewhere above and it felt good, but there were countless millions of colors I had never seen before and that was overwhelming to process. This rainbow entity that was entering my mind, I could feel it throughout my body, and it felt like a living intelligence of some kind. I welcomed it and then I panicked when it occurred to me that I could have thoughtlessly granted access to my mind and body to someone with ill will. That really was not a good thought to have.

I went on agonizing for a long time.

Cut to: I was free floating in a vast, empty space. There was *nothing.* No kind of sensory input, no feeling, nothing. It was coldly barren and I was completely alone. It was boring. I waited for something to happen but nothing happened. I called out in my mind and no one answered. It went on. It seemed like it went on for days. And then weeks or months. I was not in my physical body or anywhere anymore. I called out. I begged to be brought back. I worried I had died. I had horrific ideas that my family would find me dead of a "drug overdose," when my intention was not to get high or to punish myself, but to have a spiritual, comforting experience. I had the deepest sorrow I've ever felt. I begged for my life back. I begged and begged. And then I got angry and demanded it. I was "screaming" in this place in such a rage. This could not be it.

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by Anonymousreply 9803/25/2021

cleanse*

by Anonymousreply 9903/25/2021

Everything I had experienced with ayahuasca up to this point felt alive, intelligent, loving. This place was without any of that. It felt cold and digital somehow. Electronic. And yet it made me realize that this life and this world feel like hazy dreams by comparison. So I knew that that place is more of a reality than this one is and that terrified me because I love my family and my life so much more than I had ever realized and I wanted nothing more than to be here and to finish out my life story. I demanded the right to finish my life. "The voice" told me that everything is OK, that life ends on its own terms at the right time for it to end, and that I had no fault in it being over. I cried so hard and I demanded so adamantly that I have a chance to complete the story I signed up for.

And then at some point I felt something. I felt the presence of something and it was terrifying. It had a heavy magnetism that felt utterly destructive. And then in a flash, this tiny object in the distance was zooming at me, again at a speed that is too hard to comprehend. I was an orb and it buzzed and zapped and had whipping tendrils all around it and it felt like it had all the power in the world. I wondered if it was the Sun or God or what it might be. It scared the fuck out of me.

Then I was falling. It was as if I were falling through space with sheets of glass slamming into me, and me falling through them, and the sheets of all all were moments of my life. I have written about this here before. The moments were from my past and they were moments that had not yet occurred. It happened so fast that I couldn't make any sense of whether it was real or not. As I "saw" them, what happened was that I actually re-experienced them. Moments from childhood, recent ones, all just chaotically flying around.

I saw myself from above sitting in a chair looking old and weathered and I couldn't decide it if was my father or me, but it didn't look enough like my father to be him. But I had died, so how could it be me? And I registered, again, that this all felt more real than our reality does and I knew it was real.

"On the way down," I saw two things that confused me and annoyed me and terrified me. This was April of 2015. I saw Donald Trump. He was president of the United States. And I thought, why the fuck am I seeing Donald Trump? And I thought, well, if he wins the election, then I'll know that I was seeing the future. And I knew that it was more real than reality. I have discussed this here and at the time I discussed it, I refused to describe the second vision because it was too horrifying for me to even describe for fear that somehow saying it out loud might make it manifest. But Trump is gone now and so I will say it. I saw a concentration camp, with people up against a wire fence looking starved and suffering. It scared the shit out of me so much that from April of 2015, I was absolutely raving about the reality that Trump could become president and the capacity of his willingness to do evil things. I wrote about the dangers of him in 2015. I told everyone I absolutely knew he would win and everyone told me I was crazy.

Anyway, I crashed through all those visions, past and future, and then my eyes opened and I was in my bedroom. I BAWLED. I could not believe I had the chance to be alive again. I literally jumped up and down for the next two days to experience gravity. Yes, that's crazy, but that's the effect it had.

After all the sensational sensory overstimulation and the hyper-felt emotions, I realized when I "came back" here that I am here to live out a story and I am determined to do it. I also realized that no matter how complicated things seem in this world, things in this world are sooooooooooooooo simple. We have so many limitations on us, and I am telling you, that is a blessing compared with chaos. I remember as if it happened last night that this place feels like a paradise, this place being our live in this world. I don't think it's the ultimate reality anymore.

by Anonymousreply 10003/25/2021

R96 Post away, my love. It’s good for you and informative to us.

by Anonymousreply 10103/25/2021

R68, I would say that adults are exactly who ayahuasca is for/who can handle it. It's too complex an experience to be wasted on a youth (blank slate) who can't process/appreciate the experience, and it's not exactly a party drug like molly.

by Anonymousreply 10203/25/2021

Not exactly? It's not a party drug or "a good time." It can be a terrifying, traumatic experience, and it can be a blissful experience, but it demands intention and attention. Ayahuasca isn't something you pop in your mouth that shows you rainbow colors. I really cannot imagine anyone taking it as a party drug.

by Anonymousreply 10303/25/2021

R103, there are a lot of college-age kids going for ayahuasca tourism trips, and I'm like, why? The experience will almost certainly be lost on them. I think they think it'll be like some jungle acid trip.

by Anonymousreply 10403/25/2021

R104 Have you taken ayahuasca?

I really can't imagine the experience being lost on almost anyone. It can be transcendent. It's insightful and profound and usually makes people feel tremendous empathy and a feeling of interconnectedness. I can't imagine how that would be lost on someone because they're in college. It might be a good foundational view with which to start out a life.

After I took ayahuasca and felt that plants and all beings are conscious and interconnected, I actually walked around and thought, "wow, no wonder indigenous people send young people on vision quests. I would have lived so differently if I had seen the world the way I see it now when I was young and ambitious."

by Anonymousreply 10503/25/2021

R105, yes, when I was younger. And you're right, while I wouldn't say it was lost on me, I would say that I wasn't mature enough/had enough meaningful life experience to process what the experience was trying to teach me. I think I needed more wisdom, maturity, and introspection to fully process it.

by Anonymousreply 10603/25/2021

R106 That's fair. I could have lost my mind from it had I not been in such a desperate life situation when I took it and if I had not known what to expect. But people of many ages take it and get a lot out of it.

by Anonymousreply 10703/25/2021

Great posts,R94.

by Anonymousreply 10803/25/2021

Is it something that you want to do with a friend/partner?

by Anonymousreply 10903/25/2021

R109 If you go to a retreat in South America, Costa Rica, etc., then you need to research the safety, and especially if you're a woman, you should go with someone else. Some bad things have happened at some retreats--generally, sexual assaults of women by people who work at the places. They're rare, but they have happened.

One other little caveat: some South American shamans use admixtures--other plants in their recipes--and for some, that includes "toé," which can be datura or brugmansia (aka angel's trumpet), and it is very potent and potentially lethal. It's unlikely anyone would add it without really knowing what they are doing, but I've read that people should make sure to request no toé. So just take proper precautions and do your research. Ayahuasca itself shouldn't be dangerous to almost anyone, but admixtures can be, and there have been some safety problems at some retreat centers.

Also, if you decide to do one of those 'ayahuasca tourism' things, you should still read about the process of how it is made and why people take it traditionally, read about people's experiences and/or watch YouTube videos of people describing their experiences so that you'll know what you are in for. You also need to be certain you don't have any contraindicated medical conditions such as cardiovascular problems, and that your system is well cleared (at least six weeks) of any antidepressants or antianxiolytics, *and* you should follow an ayahuasca diet beginning several days before the experiences. They're important from a traditional perspective, but the diet turns out also to be important or at least useful from a physiological standpoint because some types of foods don't mix well with ayahuasca. Not observing the diet won't kill you, but it could adversely affect your experience in some ways--anxiety, for example--and if you're going to take such a huge leap of faith as to take ayahuasca, why not take the step of observing the diet, too?

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by Anonymousreply 11003/25/2021

Please watch this documentary, and especially the very last part where the host discusses how Ayahuasca can permanently change one's brain chemistry for the better. Several men portrayed in the video relay how the experience changed their lives 2 years later. All were dealing with deep depression and/or very traumatic childhood experiences.

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by Anonymousreply 11103/25/2021

R110 and R111 Thank you!

by Anonymousreply 11203/25/2021

Psilocybin, iboga, ayahuasca and I believe also LSD are well documented at this point as effective treatments for anxiety, depression and addiction cessation.

When the founder of Alcoholics Anonymos formulated his 12 steps, one of the original steps was the use of LSD. It was eliminated because eventually people decided LSD is a "bad drug" and that it's crazy to use a drug to break an addiction. But it works.

Psilocybin has the greatest efficacy of any known substance at breaking tobacco smoking addiction. Ibogaine is an extract used clinically for severe physical addiction.

Psychedelics can cause neurons that normally are not connected to attach, and that is what creates temporary extraordinary sensory perception. It likely repairs some damaged neurons in the process, sort of a "tune up" that makes the brain function more as it was designed to do.

I described how the ayahuasca gave me a "physical exam" every time I took it but I neglected to mention that that included a "scrubbing bubbles" sensation inside my head. It felt like something fizzy was happening in my brain, or that's how I interpret the sensation, anyway.

My short-term memory improved after those experiences, but I also took lion's mane mushroom (non-psychotropic) supplements for several years. Lion's mane has been clinically proven to improve mild cognitive impairment and show strong promise for potentially regenerating damaged nerve cells, which to date has not been possible. You can find abstracts from studies relating to this via PubMed, NIH's online medical research library.

by Anonymousreply 11303/25/2021

Dude, just buy some 'shrooms.

by Anonymousreply 11403/25/2021

Machine elves are typically attributed to smoked DMT and not usually to ayahuasca.

DMT is the "light show" component and generally speaking the more superficial aspect of the experience.

The ayahuasca vine is the soul experience.

The order of events is: 1) the physical purge; 2) the DMT visuals (if they happen); and 3) the visionary vine. The third part has been likened to "10 years of therapy in six hours," and you really should think about it that way if your inclination is to take ayahuaca for giggles. If you just want to get high, choose something else. If you want to heal your soul or confront your questions about mortality, then take ayahuasca (or iboga).

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by Anonymousreply 11503/25/2021

I love you, R113. You’re so thought provoking!

by Anonymousreply 11603/25/2021

Thanks, R116. Love you back.

by Anonymousreply 11703/25/2021

thank you all so much for so many great posts!

by Anonymousreply 11803/25/2021

Is it very different from shrooms?

by Anonymousreply 11903/25/2021

R119 Shrooms, while psycho active, and are light, buoyant, spiritual, sensually enhancing... you are never completely "out" of your regular self and understanding.

For most people Ayahuasca is much heavier, and you are definitely not in control. Following someone else's directions of what to see, think and understand. Being out, away, different from your regular self is what the experience is. Not for the faint of heart.

Also, as someone upthread said - one, almost universal outcome of the Ayahuasca experience is the lasting awareness that plants are sentient.

by Anonymousreply 12003/25/2021

Robin Quivers from Howard Stern tried it but I don't remember what she said about it.

by Anonymousreply 12103/25/2021

If this trip is like Tori’s “Datura,” I wanna go!

by Anonymousreply 12203/25/2021

Great thread!

by Anonymousreply 12303/26/2021

R122 It's like Tori's "Sister Janet." That song is an account of an ayahuasca experience.

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by Anonymousreply 12403/26/2021

And I believe the song "Beauty of Speed" is an account of DMT.

We climbed through the canopy only to find a crack our cage.

The last thing, a look you gave, and then we tumbled out of control.

I tried to strike a deal with the universe. Me and my deals with the universe!

Smacked upside of the head with the harsh of daylight.

So simple last evening: the beauty of speed.

Afraid we've been changing. In a way I wasn't loving. FEEL those colors changing. The beauty of speed...

I'm coming back for more out of a black and white world. Past a shooting star: the beauty of speed! See the colors changing! See the colors changing...

Even still, I was built to tolerate your temper-ature. It fluctuates, so I must break through the bleak of winter, through your latest barrier. Your latest barrier.

Smacked upside of the head...

I'm coming back for more out of my black and white world, past a shooting star, the beauty of speeeeed! See the colors changing, see the colors changing, see the colors changing, Baby, changing, Baby, changing, I see, see the colors changing!

Afraid I've been changing.

In a way, I wasn't loving.

Feel those colors changing.

The beauty of speed.

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by Anonymousreply 12503/26/2021

[quote]the lasting awareness that plants are sentient

In what sense or senses? That they 'feel' or react to physical stimulus? That they are somehow conscious or have emotions?

I'm curious because I have had similar thoughts w/o ever taking ayahuasca.

by Anonymousreply 12603/26/2021

R126 I didn't write the comment that you quoted, but I wrote the long descriptions of my ayahuasca experiences above. "The voice" I discuss that talked to me telepathically, that felt maternal or grandmotherly and seemed to "hold my hand" and support me through the re-living of rough experiences and made me feel safe felt to me like the plant. I can explain the voice etc. better than I can explain why it felt like that spirit was the spirit of the vine, but it did feel that way to me unambigously. In my mind, I think of her as "mama ayahuasca." I even always had the sense that as my body was being "inspected," it was the spirit of the plant moving through a human/animal body and "playing" with the ability to move in a different way.

After my second ayahuasca experience, which was deeply moving, I came out of it and had great difficulty rationalizing that I felt like I had been "possessed" by a plant intelligence. That just seemed thoroughly schizophrenic. Yet it was the only way I could interpret what happened, and all subsequent experiences were the same. Even the last one that was a "breakthrough psychedelic experience" that detached me from my body, as soon as I opened my eyes and was back in this reality, I was simultaneously comforted by "mama ayahuasca" and told it's OK, it's OK, you're OK.

After every experience, for weeks and months afterward, I used to gently touch plants as I walked down the street and mentally acknowledge them. Now my house is full of plants and I honestly have great respect for them as conscious, intelligent beings.

I now believe that plants access information in a different way than we do. Our brains calculate and they filter stimuli out so that what we experience is limited and we can move through life as we need to do without distractions. I'm sure all plants have different life experiences, but I believe that many hold great wisdom and have superior intelligences to ours. We just normally are not able to communicate, and ingesting ayahusca, iboga, mushrooms, cactus et al. allows us to experience one another.

by Anonymousreply 12703/26/2021

Also, R126, in the Amazon, ayahuasca is regarded as a "teacher plant." People who use it respect ayahuasca as an intelligent, kind entity who shares her knowledge with people when they approach her respectfully. (My experiences confirmed this for me.) I believe ayahuasca was the clear inspiration for the intelligent, nurturing tree in the movie Avatar.

In parts of Africa, people likewise view iboga as a teacher plant--but less kind, with a masculine quality that beats the hell out of you psychically but which nevertheless imparts profound information, including connections with deceased ancestors. This plant and tradition were represented in the movie Black Panther, but as a comic book-y flower that was ingested to take people to the realm of ancestors.

by Anonymousreply 12803/26/2021

I recommend the book "The Cosmic Serpent: DNA and the Origins of Knowledge" by Jeremy Narby. It's "speculative science" but Narby's experiences in the Amazon are really fascinating.

Narby is an anthropologist and he went to the Amazon to study plant medicine.

Ayahuasca is made of two plants: banisteriopsis caapi, an enormous vine, and (most often) psychotria viridis, a leafy shrub that contains DMT. There are billions of species of plants in the Amazon. The vine and the leaf have to be combined to produce the psychoactive effects of ayahuasca.

Narby was confounded and frustrated by the answers he got when he asked the people how they ever figured out how to combine those two plants out of all the plants in the area. He asked them, and their answer was "We ask the plants."

He asked what that means and they were as confused as he was. They just kept insistently saying that they ask the plants and the plants tell them. Eventually, when he couldn't understand, they talked him into trying ayahuasca and then he understood that plants can communicate telepathically, and they tell people things. Just like the local people said. He had been racking his brain trying to interpret their answer as a metaphor but it was just a plain answer.

by Anonymousreply 12903/26/2021

[quote]Maybe I can lick a toad.

Oh not again honey!

by Anonymousreply 13003/26/2021

I've had some great times on hallucinogens. I've also had some not so great times on them.

When people get all spiritualistic about it, I instantly lose interest.

by Anonymousreply 13103/26/2021

R124 How did I miss this?! Source, please.

by Anonymousreply 13203/26/2021

R127 I swear, I want you to make love to me.

by Anonymousreply 13303/26/2021

R132 Source of what?

R133 LOL thanks...I think I'm better at analyses and interpretations than at sex, though.

by Anonymousreply 13403/26/2021

Do I gotta go all the way to damn Peru to try this?

by Anonymousreply 13503/26/2021

R135 Costa Rica has ayahuasca retreats and it's more convenient to get there and the people are more Americanized.

There are tradeoffs: In Peru, you are more likely to get an authentic experience. Many of the shamans are real, tradtionally trained through apprenticeships, the environment is the natural home to ayahuasca, and you can always book an adjoining trip to see Machu Picchu!

In Costa Rica, you'd get an experience made for tourists, an imitation of an Amazon-region experience. The shamans there are more likely to be attuned to satisfying customers than to doing "soul work," and she they most likely would have studied the ritual as a means to an end of making money rather than as a spiritual commitment.

by Anonymousreply 13603/26/2021

Some people are describing bad trips earlier in the thread. Never tried ayahuasca, but as a teen (and depressed at times), took morning Glory seeds and tripped alone and it was horrible. I had some visuals and then threw up off and on and at one point felt very peaceful/connected and listened to Enya, but at some point started to panic and feel like I’d never come back and I was also upset that I had no control over the visuals. I remember holding my breath and not feeling any burning and then I panicked more thinking of how to end the trip and how stupid I was for doing this and considered jumping out of my window upstairs. I prayed out of fear and panic and then managed to call a friend to come over and help calm me down.

Setting and mindset are everything with hallucinogens and I would caution anyone against tripping alone. I never took a hallucinogen again after that horrible trip—that was a few decades ago.

by Anonymousreply 13703/26/2021

I have read that sole indigenous people or at least shamans consider ayahuasca a teacher also in the sense that you learn lessons class by class, just like in a school or through tutoring, apprenticeship, etc.

There's a saying that "ayahuasca never gives you more than you are prepared to handle," even though it can be overwhelming at the time you do it.

So, typically, it's meant to be taken more than one time. Like learning numbers before counting, before arithmetic, before algebra, each incremental installment builds on prior lessons. So don't expect to drink it and experience a big-bang revelation and then be done with it.

And it is quite unlike addictive drugs: You typically do not want to do it again soon after you do it because it is very challenging. Shamans consider the ayahuasca experience to be less important than the time between experiences during which you integrate/make sense of/discover meaning from those limited experiences. Then you are ready for the next one.

by Anonymousreply 13803/26/2021

R121, she went to Etnikas, mentioned above. She had a great experience. That's why I chose Etnikas. It was great.

by Anonymousreply 13903/26/2021

Here's a clip of Robin talking about it. There's much more to the segment, but they only posted part of it.

The footage isn't of Etnikas though, and I don't recognize the shaman (I met two): perhaps she had two different experiences and two different places.

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by Anonymousreply 14003/26/2021

Different part of the clip.

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by Anonymousreply 14103/26/2021

R135 There are ayahuasca shamans (shamen?) all over the country. Every county in the Bay Area has a "center"....

As was said above (and documented by the solo morning glory trip) never, ever do ayahuasca alone. Best situation is where you have total confidence in the experience and good intent of those who are guiding you.

by Anonymousreply 14203/26/2021

^^ I remember seeing some reality TV show about a couple in rural Kentucky who were running an Ayahuasca center. They both seemed a little like people of WalMart MAGA folk.... not my choice, but hey, if that makes you feel safe...

by Anonymousreply 14303/26/2021

R134 That T based that song on a trip. It’s one of my favorite b-sides. I mean, I suppose the lyrics give that impression...

[quote] Master shaman, I have come / With my dolly from the shadow side

by Anonymousreply 14403/26/2021

R144 I don't have a source. It's my interpretation, but it's crystal clear to me.

Sister Janet has been a favorite of mine since the 90s, but I always thought the lyrics were stream of consciousness like "Here. In My Head" and "Thoughts." Then I took ayahuasca, and the next time I played the song I realized that it's a totally straightforward account of an ayahuasca experience.

I'll break it down. You can choose whether or not to hear it as I do.

[quote] Master shaman, I have come

Straightforward account to making a pilgrimage to a shaman.

[quote] with my dolly from the shadow side / with a demon and an Englishman

A dolly has long been used in magical rituals. The shadow side refers to another, hidden dimension. She has made the pilgrimage with a demon—this may be metaphorical, or it may be a "term of endearment" for someone she knew—and an Englishman. That may be her husband, who is from Cornwall, or it may be another English person. She was living in England at the time the song was written.

So far, all of this adds up to her making a pilgrimage to a medicine person. She has prepared, bringing her dolly and her demon (many possible meanings), and she has gone with a companion.

[quote] I'm a mother / I'm my son

This is VERY typical of ayahuasca, and with breakthrough experiences with different psychedelics: interconnectedness, realizing that not only in a metaphorical way, but in the ultimate version of reality, we are all one. So here, the process is beginning, and she is realizing that she is the same person as the people she is close to, and we could extend this to say with all people.

[quote] Nobody else / is slipping the blade in easy / nobody else / is slipping the blade in the marmalade

I interpret this as a moment of realizing that the people who she has blamed for causing harm, for hiding blades in sweet things that she then ingests, are no different than she is. She has been blaming others, those closest to her, for surreptitiously harming her. She's now realizing that she is those people. "I'm them" could mean that she harms them back in the same ways, or it could be a realization that she's been harming herself--nobody else is doing it. Either way, she identifies with those people now.

[quote] but all the angels / and all the wizards / black and white / are lighting candles in our hands

Above, I described the phased processes I've always experienced with ayahuasca. Here, she is giving us phases of experience: First, she meets the shaman, prepared to do the work. Then, she is introspective and has an epiphany about her relationships and her accountability. Now, she is seeing apparitions: angels and wizards have materialized in front of her. I find it interesting that she says "black and white" here and also in "Beauty of Speed," which I believe to be about DMT, she sings she's coming out "of our black and white world."

Tori has talked quite a lot about her ayahuasca experiences with a shaman, and she often has discussed light and dark, black and white, the shadow side as compared with this world. She regards her ayahuasca "tea with the devil" trips as visiting her shadow, going into the dark, black world, and finding that it lends context to the light we all seek. She talks about balancing the two.

More in the next one...

by Anonymousreply 14503/26/2021

R145 Love your interpretation. Also, “Here. In My Head” and “Thoughts” are two of my favorite songs ever. So brooding and exquisitely uplifting all at once, and those piano lines... ::chef’s kiss::

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by Anonymousreply 14603/26/2021

More on "Sister Janet" as an ayahuasca narrative...

[quote] Can you feel them / touching hands before our eyes?

This is a straightforward depiction of the synesthesia people commonly report during these experiences. You shouldn't be able to feel wizards and angels touching one another's hands in front of you, right? Well, on ayahuasca, everything is felt. (This is, again, referenced in "Beauty of Speed" when she sings "See those colors changing / FEEL those colors changing / The beauty of speed.")

[quote] And I can even see sweet Marianne.

You have to know something personal about Tori to know what this means, but Marianne was a childhood friend of hers who died. So Tori is now under the influence of ayahuasca, and she's having visions (and feelings) of wizards and angels, and she sees her friend. So she is in fact "on the other side."

To me, it's important to note that this song sounds mysterious and haunting even without knowing what it means, but nearly everything she sings about is inspiring awe in her. She's astounded, but she sings it almost as if she is in a trance.

[quote] Sister Janet, you have come / from the woman clothed with the Sun

The Woman Clothed with the Sun is from the Book of Revelation. That is how the apparition is named in the Bible. She's also known as the Woman of the Apocalypse.

Sister Janet's identity could be anyone, but Sister Janet was an Australian Catholic nun who recorded a rock version of the Lord's Prayer in 1973. Tori was young at this time, she has always been attuned to music, and her father, a Methodist minister, forbade Tori from listening to rock music, and so this nun was probably a role model for Tori as a child.

[quote] Your veil is quietly becoming none.

"Nun" may be a pun, just for kicks. "Apocalypse" literally means "the lifting of the veil." So we have the woman of the veil, or the apocalypse. Tori is astonished here, because she is seeing "beyond the veil" that (in New Age speak, most commonly) divides this material world from the spiritual world. Sister Janet comes into her mind, Tori realizes she was birthed by something divine, and she realizes she is seeing/feeling that aspect of being.

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by Anonymousreply 14703/26/2021

R147 Okay, now you’re preaching to the choir.

Still love you and your divergent thinking!

by Anonymousreply 14803/26/2021

More Tori...

[quote] Call the Wanderer / He has gone

The Wanderer is a pseudonym for Odin, the ultimate Norse god.

This is a rare mention of a pagan god from so early in her music, but as time has gone on, Tori has made a lot more mentions of European pre-Judeo-Christian gods, and her album Night of Hunters takes her back to ancient Ireland, when the Romans came in and committed genocide against the Celtic gods. This is a really big part of her beliefs system, and she now refers frequently to the disappearance of the "old gods," and she resents it. Her friend Neil Gaiman's "American Gods" deals with this, as well.

[quote] And all those up there / are making it look so easy / with your perfect wing / A wing can cover all sorts of things

This rings of sarcasm to me, which is kind of a funny thing to be put into such a reverent song, but it's common to her worldview. She is having this divine vision--all those angels she sees are presumably beautiful, hovering, and she reveals a little jealousy that they're making being look so easy...but then she cuts them with an accusation of sorts, observing that they have perfect wings, but under them they are concealing something. So she sees these angelic creatures, but she suspects that they are not showing their true selves. (Biblical angels are freaky and often violent creatures, and they can look really terrifying under their wings, which they use to cover themselves, depending on the order of angel.)

[Chorus]

[quote] Hey! Yeah! Yes, this again! Well, I—I think I could try this once again.

This is the first time in the song when she has a pretty excited tone. Her journey seems to be coming to an end, and it has been tumultuous and bizarre and revelatory...and she decides that, yes, she could do it again.

If you take ayahuasca, you'll definitely be left questioning whether you would ever want to put yourself through that again. And you'll probably decide yes.

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by Anonymousreply 14903/26/2021

R148 It wasn't meant to be preaching.

People in this thread have asked for people to share experiences, and I just wanted to walk through the song lyrics because I interpret them to be a really reliable representation of a typical ayahuasca experience.

She went through the phases of visions, self-discovery, personal accountability, encountering the divine, coming down, and questioning whether she could ever put herself through that again.

So I thought it would be worthwhile. :)

by Anonymousreply 15003/26/2021

R150 You are too adorable :*

by Anonymousreply 15103/26/2021

What is the body high like? We used to call tripping on acid "frying" and that's kind of what my body felt like. A little more mellow on shrooms. I loved Molly and K back in the day. What's the closest body sensation you can compare it to or is it all just in the mind with the exception of the purging?

by Anonymousreply 15203/26/2021

R152 I had a distinct buzzing feeling. Just a latent energetic kind of buzzing, and it seemed to be about the same frequency as the buzzing sound I heard in my last super-trip.

This woman does a good job of describing it.

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by Anonymousreply 15303/26/2021

Some of these visuals look just like what I saw/was enmeshed in during the highly visual part, but many parts don't look familiar at all.

The sounds here, though, are very reminiscent of the "out of body" part of the experience. It's unpleasant and it's so tied to my memory that these sounds actually still make me feel physically nauseated.

The vibrating/buzzing feeling feels very tied to the sound.

And by the way, in traditional shamanic approaches to architecture, sound is of the utmost important. During all ayahuasca rituals, shamans sing songs called icaros that they use to accompany the person on ayahuasca, to direct their trip and to keep them safe. It's really interesting because the shifting geometric compositions, the sounds, the vibrating and song are all tied together.

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by Anonymousreply 15403/26/2021

This movie is EXCELLENT. It seems to be inspired by the sort of philosophic worldview that ayahuasca imparts, but it avoids directly mentioning ayahuasca and instead substitutes a fictitious replacement plant.

The movie has an 82 ("universal acclaim") on Metacritic and 96% on Rotten Tomatoes.

It's worth your time whether or not you ever drink ayahuasca.

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by Anonymousreply 15503/26/2021

R155 I’ve listed after that man’s body a few times. Damn.

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by Anonymousreply 15603/26/2021

r95 Uh, with the "explosive diarrhea" - was there a toilet nearby or ... ?

You were able to clean yourself up for the rest of the trip, right?

by Anonymousreply 15703/26/2021

*lusted

by Anonymousreply 15803/26/2021

This thread is absolutely fascinating! Thank you to everyone who posted their experiences, especially r113.

Many of the things described ( the sounds, the geometry, the movement and sensations) sound like accounts from ancient sources I have read in the past although these sources did not directly reference ayahuasca.

Also, I can't remember which poster posted the link with the "machine elves" digital art but that fucking blew me away! I can only describe it as "falling into" that picture. The artist doesn't seem to offer prints which is a shame. I can't stop thinking about it.

Please continue posting your experiences as they fascinate me. While I'd be interested in exploring this avenue, as a female, I don't think it would be too safe, sadly.

by Anonymousreply 15903/26/2021

R159, there are female shamans/ayahuasca healers, if that's of any interest.

by Anonymousreply 16003/26/2021

Yes, r160, I've had a session with one minus the ayahuasca, so I know they are out there.

It's not the shamans that concern me. It's the other people who would be attending. It's mostly white males and I would not feel completely comfortable around them in that sort of situation.

But thank you.

by Anonymousreply 16103/26/2021

Hi, all.

I'm the person who shared those long posts above about my experiences with ayahuasca and the Embrace of the Serpent movie.

This is the type of conversation I appreciate about this website, along with interesting obscure stuff, old-timey gay stuff (Bette and Joan, etc.).

I'm a sincere and earnest person, probably to a fault, and I am sad to say that after more than a decade of some illuminating discussions here, I feel like I need to leave this site and find something else to do with my time, or at least a more civil online forum.

Someone started a thread here a few days ago that has stunned me. The topic is a news story about a 24-year-old woman who was gang raped and murdered by two men. 85 percent of the comments in that thread mock the woman, say she got what she wanted and worse, or else they say that she got what she deserved for hanging out with black men, along with astonishing lies about black men being savage killers and rapists. These are the kinds of lies Donald Trump and his followers tell that almost destoyed the United States.

The past four years was traumatic and I do not wish to expose myself to that kind of sick rhetoric any longer.

I started a thread imploring the site owners to moderate content to prohibit extreme hatred, such as claiming a rape and murder victim deserved what she got and claiming that black men are violent and subhuman. My thread got a lot of support. And then it got deleted by the site owners. The hateful thread is still here, and so I can't be part of this community any longer.

Sincere thanks for engaging in my last meaningful conversation on this website. I wish all of you well and I hope you find peace in your explorations.

by Anonymousreply 16203/27/2021

[quote] I'm a sincere and earnest person, probably to a fault, and I am sad to say that after more than a decade of some illuminating discussions here, I feel like I need to leave this site and find something else to do with my time, or at least a more civil online forum.

I can sense your sincerity and earnestness, R162, quite intensely, actually. I completely relate to where you’re coming from because I have often felt the same, taken extended breaks from the site, and no longer engage on it as often and intensely as I used to. That being said, there is light to be found here amidst the darkness, but I understand and respect your decision.

In fact, the last couple of weeks I have been mulling over doing the same as you. My subscription ends in December and I have already decided not to renew it. I can’t say I won’t be back but a part of my relationship with DL has certainly ended. Most of it has to do with me. On the cusp of middle-age, I find that I want to tend to and explore so much.

I wish I knew you outside of here, love. You’re a true gem.

by Anonymousreply 16303/27/2021

Is it something that can help you get out of a rut, or stop you from feeling sad (about a loss, for example)..

by Anonymousreply 16403/27/2021

R162 I had you blocked, which is very curious because this last post is reasonable, and in part, something I could write myself. But you must have posted something at sometime that offended me, so I blocked you. My point is that in this sloppy, blind, binary, two dimensional environment of digital communications - silly, offensive, corrosive things are said... and misperceived.

I do think that the anonymous nature of the internet not only exposed an endemic racism/hate, but actually fostered it, grew it. It's a huge problem. I think the only thing that can save civilization (the root of the word being "civil") is a kind of spiritual renewal engendered by things like ritual and awakening - ayahuasca an example of that.

I can understand your reason for stepping away. I think a "goodbye cruel world" message in social media is actually asking for discussion of why you want that . (Snitty trolling would respond like, "it's not an airport, you don't need to announce your departure").

But this thread, your contributions to it, your understanding of its value, suggest how much you can contribute to DL. Ignore the mess all around, stay to build the beauty. I have no clue why I ever blocked you... but there you go.

by Anonymousreply 16503/27/2021

R164 Did you read the posts on this thread? Yes, absolutely the point is, in part, to awaken the mind/being to something otherwise ignored, missed, unknown. But folks need to know it's not just for momentary pleasure - there is a "risk" involved. You can press restart, but the price is you can never be that previous self.

At least in my thinking.

by Anonymousreply 16603/27/2021

I have a chronic gastrointestinal disorder.

I'm asymptomatic, but anything that involves potential pants-shitting immediately makes me not want to partake.

by Anonymousreply 16703/27/2021

A few years ago, podcasters Ross and Carrie ("Oh No, Ross and Carrie") went down to Costa Rica to do ayahuasca and detailed their experiences.

It's pretty funny and eye-opening.

Part 1 linked below.

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by Anonymousreply 16803/27/2021

Plant Medicine. Off topic, but this is probably a good thread to ask: CBD vs THC. Can anyone speak to the question whether CBD actually does anything?

by Anonymousreply 16903/27/2021

R169 CBD does work and helps with pain, anxiety, and some forms of depression.

by Anonymousreply 17003/27/2021

R169 I have started using cbd for cramps and for a migraine I had recently, and partner took some for anxiety. We take relatively low doses as needed but it helps take the edge off pain and anxiety, but it does need to be combined with a bit of THC to work (but can be a microdose to avoid a high). There are products out there with an 18:1 ratio, etc. When I’ve taken it for pain, etc. it has improved my mood slightly, I’ve found. But for severe pain, you’ll have to up the dose quite a bit, which I worry will create tolerance over time if used too often.

by Anonymousreply 17103/27/2021

For severe pain, I would suggest regular/moderate ratios of CBD:THC. Weed, when I still used it, could take my pain away almost as effectively as an opiate, but I would definitely get high.

by Anonymousreply 17203/27/2021

Thank you, r162, I am very sorry to see you leave as your posts have fascinated me but I completely understand your disgust.

TBH, I had been avoiding this place for several months because of all the hate. It never used to be this bad. It seems like it's been overrun with MAGAts and other scumbags.

But I logged back in after reading all of the posts in this thread to let ALL of you know I appreciate the openness shared here. So thank you to everyone who shared.

by Anonymousreply 17303/27/2021

R163 and R175 please do not leave and leave us with trolls and hateful people in here! Although I understand if you need to. I avoid most threads in here because of the horrible things people say, but stick to my special niche threads that I like, including spiritual threads and some celebrity gossip. It is disheartening to see so much snark and bitterness in many threads but we need more people to call it out and provide more balance to the nastiness. Otherwise it’s just a bunch of angry trolls. But I think your frustration is valid so do what you need to do! I just wish we had a place to interact that wasn’t so toxic.

by Anonymousreply 17403/27/2021

R174 DL has always been full of snark and bitterness. That is fine. It's tolerable and at times relatable.

That is not what I am talking about.

I am talking about a thread about a young woman who was raped by two men and murdered by them. In that thread, with over 100 responses, the majority of responses either said that the woman deserved it/wanted it/asked for it because she hung out with black men, or else they said that all black men are violent/rapists/murderers while dehumanizing them as oversexed animals.

That is not snark or bitterness. It's the worst kind of hatred. It is truly Nazi-level hatred, dehumanizing an entire race and mocking a woman who was killed after being serial raped.

It is not tolerable.

I complained about it.

My complaint was deleted and that thread was not, and not were the sick responses.

If I joined any kind of club or community in real life where people spoke this way, much less thought this way, I would speak out against it. If the proprietor of that place told me to shut up and told the others to keep talking, I would leave it because that is not a place I would have any interest in being.

I have not read worse anywhere on the Internet than what is being said now on DataLounge, and it pains me because I have come here for so long and now I regret having engaged with people who think these things. I feel guilty about it.

by Anonymousreply 17503/27/2021

R140 Thanks for the clip. I remember Robin trying to talk seriously about it, but in typical Howard fashion, he just made fun of her for it. Gonna watch it again.

by Anonymousreply 17603/27/2021

Are the ayahuasca and san pedro cactus experiences similar?

by Anonymousreply 17703/27/2021

3,200-year-old mural of spider god found in Peru. I'm thinking some of these ancient people were partaking...

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by Anonymousreply 17803/27/2021

"Embrace the Serpent" (free for Amazon Prime members) clearly states that knowledge of Ayahuasca and other beneficial plants came from the "Sky gods" who came to Earth as teachers. This is in direct contrast to the many videos where hosts claim that the plants themselves imparted the knowledge.

Wondering if the colonizing priests savagely beat the natives for discussing native traditions and beliefs and therefore their origin stories changed.

Either way Ayahuasca is an antidote to the many intestinal parasites and tropical diseases. Perhaps it helped hunters focus for long periods of time, stave off hunger until the actual kill, and made extremely long, treacherous hikes and voyages tolerable.

by Anonymousreply 17903/27/2021

Strongly recommend you watch this very short video explaining the effects and demonstrated medical and psychological benefits of Ayahuasca. Those with delicate stomachs should be forewarned that Ayahuasca is very acidic

by Anonymousreply 18003/27/2021

R180 The machine elves ate the video.

by Anonymousreply 18103/27/2021

r40 Is Ecuador dangerous?

by Anonymousreply 18203/27/2021

R180, Here's the link.

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by Anonymousreply 18303/27/2021

It's possible to have the experiences relayed above through intentional meditation and especially shamanic journeying without ingesting any substance.

by Anonymousreply 18403/27/2021

R184 With all due respect, that's like a "breatharian" proposing that if one meditates enough or properly one can get all the sustenance needed from the air and one can stop eating.

Meditative states can produce great insights, open doors - enlightenment transforming how one experiences being itself. But its is different from the ayahuasca-metabolizing experience. Not even saying which is more authentic or more transformative, just that there is a difference.

Hiking to the top of Mt Whitney and walking through the Louvre are both wonderful experiences. There is no need to say they are the same.

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by Anonymousreply 18503/28/2021

R185 I appreciate what you say that your experiences with ayahuasca were distinct from meditation or guided journey without ayahuasca. However, believe it or not, I have experienced the reset/healing from helpers, electrical energy zapping areas of my body, color healing, intelligent two-way conversations, downloads and life changing understanding, among many other experiences described thread, without ayahuasca. Just presenting another perspective. I do have a funny story about when I did imbibe which I will write below.

by Anonymousreply 18603/28/2021

When I took took ayahuasca, I was the same as the poster above that had explosive diarrhea, which started 12 hrs after I ingested and went for 6 hrs after that. Also threw up 6 hrs after ingestion and broke a blood vessel in my eye from all the harsh yakking. So yes there was a purge! Lol! Anyhoodle, I was due to get on a plane 3 days later and was concerned about the eye and pressure so went to ER. Now...if you were me, do you tell the story of how this demon red eye came to be, or do you say you threw up from bad food?? People in scrubs took lots of notes....

by Anonymousreply 18703/28/2021

R182, I never had any problems there. I would avoid Guayaquil though -- which is easy enough.

by Anonymousreply 18803/29/2021

Of all the videos I've watched I strongly recommend this one particularly if you are right brained. Towards the end the host explains how you can get the same effect for free if that's what is right for you.

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by Anonymousreply 18903/30/2021

I am guessing this isn't something that can be done in the US?

by Anonymousreply 19003/30/2021

Ayahuasca is federally illegal in the U.S., and it's a schedule 1 drug, which is preposterous. Schedule 1 drugs are supposed to carry a high risk of death by overdose, high risk of physical addiction, and have no medicinal value. None of this applies.

There are a couple of exceptions to the legal status, though.

Two Brazilian churches, União do Vegetal (UDV) and Santo Daime, won a US Supreme Court case that allows them both to administer ayahuasca as a religious sacrament. This is the only explicitly legal way to use ayahuasca in the U.S., and both churches are Christian.

(Notably, a study of UDV members by psychiatrist Charles Grob of the UCLA School of Medicine found them to be psychologically and physically healthier than average, and he has recommended ayahuasca as a treatment for depression.)

The other "legal" use in the U.S. is not legal, per se. A few states and Washington, D.C. have decriminalized the use of plant medicines including cannabis, psilocybin and ayahuasca for personal use by individuals. That means that using it is still federally illegal and therefore risks imprisonment or high fines, but it's the lowest-level priority for police, and so you are unlikely to be arrested for using or possessing it unless you are doing something else to attract the cops--being violent, scaring people, making noise, etc. Theoretically, jaywalking is a higher-priority arrest, but if you happen to jaywalk with ayahuasca in your system, then you could go to prison (theoretically!) for ayahuasca use.

Possessing the plant material that makes ayahuasca is *not* illegal anywhere in the U.S. You may own the leaves and the vine that contain DMT and harmaline. Once you cook them, you've extracted the psychoactive substances and at that point you possess an illegal substance.

by Anonymousreply 19103/31/2021

One other thing about the risk of using ayahuasca in the U.S.

My therapist is a psychiatrist who works in a hospital and she told me that a patient came in who "almost died" from using ayahuasca. I was curious to know how that happened. The patient was seen or heard by someone behaving erratically and making noises, and they called the police.

The police and EMS came and saw the patient what they believed to be a psychotic state, and the EMS brought the patient to the hospital.

The hospital immediately gave the patient an antipsychotic medication and an antidepressant/antianxilytic.

Combining ayahuasca with psychoactive pharmaceuticals can cause serotonin syndrome, which can be fatal. The hospital almost killed the patient by giving him medications for mental illness, unaware that he had ayahuasca in his system. So it was really the hospital staff that risked his life unwittingly, but because ayahuasca is illegal, they blamed the patient and the drug for the harm.

by Anonymousreply 19203/31/2021

[quote] Schedule 1 drugs are supposed to carry a high risk of death by overdose, high risk of physical addiction, and have no medicinal value. None of this applies.

I consider the fact that marijuana is still classified as a Schedule 1 drug even more preposterous.

In other news, the New York senate passed a bill yesterday to legalize marijuana.

by Anonymousreply 19303/31/2021

R192 An important bit of advice. When you take Ayahuasca make sure mom pins a not on your shirt: "High, not psychotic."

No one should do A without a guide and a context that supports and protects you. Anyone taking it alone, just for the high, is pushing off into the ocean in a kayak with no paddle. Respect the plants or there will be tears before bedtime.

by Anonymousreply 19403/31/2021

After reading these stories I went into a trance like state and saw lights. Amazing the power of belief.

by Anonymousreply 19503/31/2021

No way this is real right?

Ahem.

www. Soul - (hyphen) Herbs. Com

It's better to fly to the country where it's legal, with a Canadian tourism company to make sure it's legit, right? There's no telling what you're ordering and no way to have accountability for it because it's currently illegal!

by Anonymousreply 19603/31/2021

R195, Remember that the drug was originally used to counteract internal parasites common in the rain forest. Forced vomiting and other forms of elimination was a magic cleanse as well as a psychological boost for those suffering helplessly.

by Anonymousreply 19703/31/2021

R196 Well, a few counter-arguments to be the devil's advocate:

1. You can travel to Peru or Brazil or Costa Rica where it's legal and presumably safe, but you're drinking the brew on faith that it has been prepared with the ingredients you hope it to be prepared with. In reality, you're taking a cup of liquid from someone you don't know and trusting that it will be safe. As mentioned above, there have been some violent incidents with some retreat staff (uncommon) and there have been issues with some shamans mixing in toé (also uncommon), which can be deadly and also can be terrifying and traumatic.

2. The plant materials are not illegal in the U.S. Making a brew of them, and thus extracting the DMT and harmaline and combining them so that they are orally active, is illegal in the U.S., however.

3. If you were to order the plant material, it's true that you don't know for sure that you'll get what you ordered. But once you receive the material, you can easily compare it with images online and verify that you've gotten what you paid for.

The bottom line is that you're taking a risk either way. And while you can try to hold a retreat center in a foreign country legally liable for harm caused to you there, what do you really think the chances are that that would work out in your favor? A tourist visiting a country for what is regarded as trendy drug tourism suing a medicine man who runs a shack? In what court? Are you going to fly back to Peru for legal proceedings? And will they take your claim seriously and award you for damages? Probably not.

by Anonymousreply 19804/01/2021

Beautifully filmed travelogue of No Peru combined with spiritual philosophy re Mother Ayahuasca. Relaxing native music for the soundtrack. Strongly recommend this immersive experience.

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by Anonymousreply 19904/01/2021

What is the plant ayahuasca comes from? Are there different types of plants?

by Anonymousreply 20004/01/2021

This is my problem. When people start talking about extraction, harmaline maoi, receptor, activator. I just don't get it and since it's shaky and underground it's hard to know the safest route of preparation. It's only self appointed gurus with teks.

by Anonymousreply 20104/01/2021

R98--- Thank you for sharing this with us. I do have a question, if you don't mind? The place you were at, where you begged to be returned to this life, do you fear death? Is that what you think you were shown, where we go when this life is over? Thank you again. I have been low dosing mushrooms to treat life long depression and self destructive behavior. It has been one week and I feel nothing except nauseous. Maybe I am being impatient because I am a very impatient person. Any input would very much appreciated. I have doubled my caps for two days now. Nothing.

by Anonymousreply 20204/01/2021

Thanks for all the vid links! I will definitely be checking them out when my schedule clears up.

by Anonymousreply 20304/01/2021

R202...are you a poster on the long-running mushroom thread? Lots of company there for novices (like us) and lots of experienced people too.

by Anonymousreply 20404/01/2021

Also R202...I am a first time user of psilocybin based on the other thread. The full effect of the capsules kicked in after about a month, I would say. It’s not so much a “high on life” feeling as it is just not spending so much time dwelling on depressing things, and being able to shake them off if they enter my mind. I also find that the advice given to set an intention each time you dose is helpful.

by Anonymousreply 20504/01/2021

Thank you, R205. As I said, I am so very impatient and it hasn't served me well, to say the least. I just want out of this darkness so very badly. Sigh.

by Anonymousreply 20604/01/2021

It takes time. Also, you might eventually want to up the dosage but it’s said to be best to do it slowly. Definitely check out both threads if you haven’t...so much good advice and support to be found over there, along with several success stories. I’m holding you in the light, as we Quakers say. Life is definitely not easy. 🕯

by Anonymousreply 20704/01/2021

I ordered some shrooms capsules. I'm waiting for them to arrive. I hope they are potent enough to work. I wonder when the effects will begin. I wonder if I can swallow like 10 to see what a mushroom experience is actually like.

by Anonymousreply 20804/01/2021

[quote]I’m holding you in the light, as we Quakers say. Life is definitely not easy.

Sorry for interjecting, R207, but your post made me smile and go “awww!” 🙏🏼

by Anonymousreply 20904/01/2021

According to R8's website, it's not safe to take in combo with almost any other drug, including Benadryl.

by Anonymousreply 21004/01/2021

[quote] This is my problem. When people start talking about extraction, harmaline maoi, receptor, activator. I just don't get it and since it's shaky and underground it's hard to know the safest route of preparation. It's only self appointed gurus with teks.

I'm certainly not saying this to encourage you to brew ayahuasca on your own, but it really is not that complicated. It sounds like you're comparing it to growing mushrooms with "tek," and nothing like that is involved. Ayahuasca is basically made like a sauce, but a whole lot of sauce.

There are three ingredients: the ayahuasca vine, the DMT-containing additive plant (more on that below) and water. That's it.

The brew is made by putting the plant materials in a big pot, simmering it for hours until it reduces to very little, straining the fluid from the plant material. You set aside the "juice" and fill up the pot full of vine and leaves and simmer it down again. You strain it again, fill the pot, simmer and strain again. Then you discard the plant material and simmer down all the ayahuasca brew you have into a cup or two. And that's it. It's not complicated. This is a technique that has been practiced for hundreds and possibly thousands of years in the rainforest.

The active chemicals in the plants is not relevant to the preparation--it's just information that explains what is having a physiological effect on your body. But it isn't complicated, either. It's just interesting to note. The ayahuasca vine contains one psychoactive (you might call it trance-inducing) substance and the DMT-containing plant that is combined with it contains a psychedelic substance (DMT). DMT is not orally active. That means that if you drink DMT, it won't have any effect ok their own. However, combining it with ayahuasca makes it orally active, and the DMT and the trance qualities work together to create a powerfully transformative experience. But you don't need to know the "how" for it to work. All you need to know is what to expect so that you can be prepared for it.

[quote] What is the plant ayahuasca comes from? Are there different types of plants?

Ayahuasca comes from a plant called Banisteriopsis caapi. It is a HUGE, twisting vine that grows in the tropics. Ayahuasca is translated as "vine of the dead" or "vine of souls" because of its profound qualities. If you ever experience it, you will understand the name.

The vine is gigantic, and so it is shredded to pulpy bits to prepare as a brew. (Tori Amos's song "Strong Black Vine" refers to it this way: Blow to bits/Every drip serpents bless/You rape Earth knowledge/Still, she will save you/From your evil faith.")

The vine is the "soul" of ayahuasca and only Banisteriopsis caapi is used.

The DMT-containing plant that is combined with it vary.

--Most commonly, Psychotria viridis, also known as chacruna, is combined with it. Chacruna is regarded as a relatively gentle form of DMT. Chacruna is a woody shrub and only its leaves are used in the brew.

--The alternative sometimes used in the Amazon is Diplopterys cabrerana, aka chaliponga. Chaliponga is regarded as a more aggressive form of DMT than chacruna.

--Not traditionally used but sometimes used by westerners in place of chacruna or chaliponga are syrian rue or acacia bark. Both of these are very potent.

by Anonymousreply 21104/01/2021

R211 Thanks!!

So ayahuasca activated DMT orally? What's the difference between 5-meo?

There's something about smoking DMT, taking 3 hits and breaking through. Is there similar with ayahuasca oral DMT?

by Anonymousreply 21204/01/2021

R203, Each video I post is of high quality but very different in style.

This one is quite long but extremely thorough. It combines a travelogue of the rain forest of Brazil and the descendants of the Mayan people with a lot of the philosophy re how Ayahuasca works as explained by an American ex-pat.

Visitors who have a variety of serious psychological and/or physical ailments are portrayed in depth going thru the process. If the purging and repetitive music start to get to you, skip to the end with the surprising follow-up of how all were cured by the immersive process.

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by Anonymousreply 21304/01/2021

R212 DMT and 5-MeO-DMT are not the same. I have never smoked DMT or experienced 5-MeO-DMT, and so I can't really comment personally. I've listened to a lot of stories from people and it sounds to me as if smoked DMT sends people immediately into another, colorful, geometric dimension for 10-15 minutes, and 5-MeO obliterates your sense of self for a time and it's less visual and more of a mind fuck, so to speak. One is wondrous and one is transcendent and stupefying, if I interpret accounts correctly.

Yes, ayahuasca makes DMT orally active. Some people have breakthrough DMT experiences with ayahuasca and some do not. I keep saying it but it can't be overstated: while smoked DMT seems to be something people do for "fun," drinking ayahuasca is not fun. It's not a 10-15 minute psychedelic trip. It's a 5-6 hour-long introspective journey. Most people who do it do see and feel spectacular visions, but what makes more of an impact in most cases is the effect of the vine as an inner personal journey. I sort of think of the combination as DMT luring unsuspecting people in with the promise of spectacle and then the vine wrapping herself around them and holding them through traumas so that they come out healed when they would not have taken the journey otherwise.

But yes, you certainly can have spectacular visions, a psychedelic breakthrough complete with ego dissolution and a knowingness of oneness on ayahuasca. It may or may not come the first time, though, because with ayahuasca, you get what you need when you need it. It's not a toy.

I realize this sounds woo-woo to people who just want to have fun with a drug but I think you'd do well to keep it in mind because you will find it to be true.

by Anonymousreply 21404/01/2021

Here's a ayahuasca trip report.

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by Anonymousreply 21504/01/2021

So do we go to heaven when we do these drugs? Does it disconnect us from the body and let our souls come out?

by Anonymousreply 21604/01/2021

In the video still above, you can see the vine (brown) and the chacruna (green leaves) in the pot. That's what is combined to make ayahuasca brew.

The buzzing in his video is what it sounds like when you're about to be "ejected" from yourself.

As he reports, I've also experienced times when the effects come on strong and then quickly wane. It's surprising and disappointing and leaves you anxious. That happened to me when I had my total breakthrough with open-eyed visuals: it began to come on and then everything was normal for 20 or so minutes and then BAM! it was an open-eyed arcade game and then it went back to normal and then I was just yanked out of my body and sent off into a void. I have found that the experiences tend to come in waves.

by Anonymousreply 21704/01/2021

Radically different video offering. Trippy visually, combined with intellectual discussion by several noted psychiatrists and university researchers.

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by Anonymousreply 21804/01/2021

R216 There's a reason it's called vine of the soul.

Also iboga, which is more aggressive than ayahuasca.

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by Anonymousreply 21904/01/2021

Could you just, drink it and then go to sleep?

Btw, I'm hearing a buzzing in my ears. I'm so highly suggestable to this stuff. I swear the last time I spent a few hours reading testimonials I started seeing random orbs.

by Anonymousreply 22004/01/2021

I don't want to work corporate America anymore. I just want to do these drugs. 😊

by Anonymousreply 22104/01/2021

How are you going to pay for the drugs?

by Anonymousreply 22204/01/2021

Savings. Then I will meditate and ask the plant about money and what I should do with my life.

by Anonymousreply 22304/01/2021

R214 Keep it up, toots! You’re doing all the filtering and hard work for us and we love you for it!

by Anonymousreply 22404/01/2021

Meant for R213!

by Anonymousreply 22504/01/2021

R216 It certainly gives us a peak into the metaphysical world, both the light and dark sides.

by Anonymousreply 22604/01/2021

I will remember to reach out to Jesus if it starts going bad.

by Anonymousreply 22704/01/2021

Forgive me, R218, but there are a couple of hot men in this vid. Thanks!

by Anonymousreply 22804/01/2021

That's the spirit, R227, you big old MARY! Yeah, I know it wasn't my show but still…

by Anonymousreply 22904/01/2021

R227 I'd be cautious, depending on how you envision Him

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by Anonymousreply 23004/01/2021

I thought [italic]Amen[/italic] was more His style. And it showed Sherman Hemsley didn't need Norman Lear to star in a hit TV show and that Clifton Davis was not to blame for the failure of [italic]That's My Mama[/italic].

by Anonymousreply 23104/01/2021

R230 Ok, I will..

Did ayahuasca give you answers you were seeking for years, after meditating beforehand? Or did it just kind of make you feel groovy and not worry about your problems anymore.

by Anonymousreply 23204/01/2021

I honestly thought Ayahuasca was the name of Joanna Kerns' maid when my show was on the air and she could afford hired help.

by Anonymousreply 23304/01/2021

R232 It showed me things I wanted to see and also things I had never fathomed and would prefer not to know. Overall, the gifts were beyond my hopes. I understand I am worthy of the same respect I give to every other person, and now I am much kinder to myself and therefore more content. I feel less connected from some social conventions and therefore alienated. I honestly carry a childlike sense of wonder about so many everyday things now that makes me feel a kind of joy that I thought was lost after childhood and it's so thrilling that thinking about it brings me to tears. It ended a lifelong compulsion of contemplating suicide and made me afraid of an early death. It convinced me death is the end of this present experience but only a transformation that may be traumatic in a moment, but no more than birth was. It made losing my mother--which terrorized me--a lot easier to accept because I now truly believe that we'll never be disconnected, just separated. It's been a godsend for me. But that's just me.

by Anonymousreply 23404/01/2021

R233 Chiiile...

by Anonymousreply 23504/01/2021

R234 You cutie, you.

by Anonymousreply 23604/01/2021

[quote][R233] Chiiile...

No, I was from Venezuela. Mr. Kirk helped me get saved from the Devil and communism when I work for the white lady on TV with him.

by Anonymousreply 23704/01/2021

R231 Issued a citation for typing while on hallucinogens.

R232 Hmmm. I think acid, psilocybin/shrooms, mescaline/peyote, high THC stuff... do affect a person per his/her experience, or intention. A long time meditator would have an awareness of what to see and experience - even unspoken or unrecognized, would go into the experience expecting certain things.

Ayahuasca seems not to care about any of that. Previous experience gets checked at the Door.

by Anonymousreply 23804/01/2021

Related, but different. I think that these tools are important, and they open up the heart, soul and mind to new understanding, bigger understanding. I think these tools, used correctly, generate the Sacred.

But, once taken a few times, do they need to be taken again. I do know folk who taken strong hallucinogens for entertainment, indicated by the frequency and geography of their use.

Ram Dass (rest his soul), one of the original LSD pioneers, stopping taking LSD. He said he did it every couple years "just to check in."

by Anonymousreply 23904/01/2021

The problem is a question of regular access in non-shitty neighborhoods.

by Anonymousreply 24004/01/2021

R234 That's like this conversation I heard where these drug experiences said they thought kids were high all the time.

by Anonymousreply 24104/01/2021

R239 Which plant if I ask it will best tell me how to do life? Because I am almost done. I've had enough. I keep praying to God that if my doesn't change could I just not be here anymore? I'm just done with it all.

by Anonymousreply 24204/01/2021

R242 Don’t give up, love. Dark nights of the soul are never easy but always fruitful.

by Anonymousreply 24304/02/2021

R239 In my experience, no, they don't necessarily need to be continued. As I said earlier, the United States schedule 1 status of psychedelics is especially egregious and preposterous because schedule 1 drugs are supposed to fulfill three primary criteria:

1. Schedule 1 drugs must be highly addictive. Psychedelics are not physically addictive and in fact they tend to be the opposite: typically, people do not use them regularly.

2. Schedule 1 drugs must pose a high risk of death by overdose. No one has ever died from an overdose of a psychedelic. Risks are associated with them for some people--for example, some people with latent psychotic illness present with psychosis after using a psychedelic, and some people who have known or unknown cardiovascular problems can be harmed by ayahuasca and iboga because they cause vasoconstriction (narrowing of blood vessels) during use. Also, because of the MAOI content in ayahuasca, combining with SSRI antidepressant medications can cause serotonin syndrome. However, all these risks very rarely cause problems and no one has ever died from overdosing on any psychedelic--unlike alcohol, narcotics, aspirin, Tylenol...

3. Schedule 1 drugs must have zero known medicinal use. This makes classifying all psychedelics, including cannabis (considered by the Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies to be a mild psychedelic), preposterous. MDMA was originally developed and used until 1985 by psychotherapists in clinics as a therapeutic to great effect. Then the US government banned researching it for medical purposes and said it has no medicinal use. We now know cannabis has a great number of medicinal properties, from anti-seizure effects to improving glaucoma symptoms, pain relief and appetite stimulation. Psilocybin is now known to be the most effective smoking cessation aid--to far better effect than prescription pharmaceuticals used for this purpose--and it is now used effectively for end-of-life mortality panic. Ibogaine has been extracted from iboga as a pharmaceutical drug used to break narcotic addiction. Ketamine is now used legally in clinics (in pharmaceutical form) to treat mental illnesses as MDMA used to be used. Ayahuasca is not administered clinically in the west and is regarded as hard to study because its preparation is more recipe-art than science, with inexact quantities in different plants, and so it has been pushed to the sidelines--which is good because it is regarded as a plant teacher and a soulful entity by those who have experienced it, and once Purdue Pharma, Pfizer or AstraZeneca commodifies it and the FDA approved their ayahuasca pills, they'll destroy the natural plants and their purposes.

by Anonymousreply 24404/02/2021

Traditionally, I believe most people use iboga one time as a spiritual rite of passage. It holds people for three full days and most people would not want to do that more than once.

My experience with ayahuasca matches those of others I have heard: I used it several times at first, with each session being a kind of elementary class that built on lessons from the one before it. After three times, I was stunned and bewildered by what I saw and felt and I needed a lot of time to make sense of it and to settle back into reality. After a couple years, I took it again and it was more comfortable and familiar, and I saw and felt much more. Then I waited a couple of years and did it again. That time involved extraordinary revelations and a feeling that I went to "the other side" and so much more, and when I came back I was grateful to be alive again, this world felt like a wonderful, wondrous place that I wanted to be, and I have only had fleeting thoughts about doing it again. When I think about it, my inclination is always that I was so grateful to come back to this life that I don't know why I am thinking about leaving it, even briefly, until it's my natural time to move on from it.

So to answer your question, R239, I think that ayahuasca is self-limiting for most people. You get life-changing lessons from it, those lessons reset and rebalance your sense of who you are in day to day life, and eventually you end up extraordinarily grateful for the life-changing lessons but the recollections of those experiences never leave you or dull at all as some memories do, and you just don't feel any call to keep drinking it. I can understand the concept of 'checking in,' though, if only because I felt so strongly that ayahuasca was a real, sentient entity, and the interaction was so intimate--a kind of mind-body meld--that I feel like taking it again would feel again like going on a vacation to visit an old friend in a way.

by Anonymousreply 24504/02/2021

Is it ok to do microdose shrooms a few days before aya?

by Anonymousreply 24604/02/2021

R245 Thanks, that all makes sense. I have a good friend who has taken ayahuasca several times a year for years. I am not one to judge any one else's journey... but I observe that he has slipped down to some shadowy places, and is rambling around a unique and distancing reality. Just kind of toss notes to him over the wall and hope for his best

R242 I don't know how genuine that post is, but may I share that there is a connection in all of us, a door to unitary Presence that is pure and limitless and unconditional love. You are not only loved by the Universe, you are that love itself. On this Good Friday, I access my own traditions to share with you that the Christ was given by the Creator to all of us to know our experience, not to die for our sins, but to conduct a healing light into our darkness. Know that out here in stupid, trivial digitalia, on an obnoxious board like this, there is an old man who prays for your happiness and well being. And that energy is all around you, holding you close. You are the eyes of the world, and it's a beautiful place to see.

by Anonymousreply 24704/02/2021

R247 that sounds like my ex ,your 1st paragraph, although not necessarily from ayahuasca

by Anonymousreply 24804/02/2021

Thanks Acid Grandfather. It's pretty genuine. My life's not great and I'm really hoping whatever happens when you ingest these psychedelics will help me make my life better.

I think my way of thinking had led to it being like this. So maybe it will help even if it's just a reset and not explicitly explaining exactly what I need to be doing.

by Anonymousreply 24904/02/2021

I am planning an ayahuasca retreat for my 40th.

by Anonymousreply 25004/02/2021

So, when we die, we go back to the one and we don't have an identity anymore? Are their other Gods? Or just the One?

Sometimes I understand why atheists really want to call it all hogwash and balderdash. The thought of having to do life for eternity seems unbearable. Much better to enjoy a finite existence.

by Anonymousreply 25104/02/2021

[quote] So, when we die, we go back to the one and we don't have an identity anymore? Are their other Gods? Or just the One?

We return to the One if and when we have rid ourselves of karma. If not, we return to hell: here.

by Anonymousreply 25204/02/2021

R251 False dichotomy, it's not either/or, Pookie.

For me the eternity/identity questions are not in some chronological prison of our current incomplete understanding. The Kingdom of Heaven is inside you, right now.

Not a lot of opportunity to discuss in a social media snack - but I sense you'd be happy with the Stoics' school of thought. Revival of it in the 21st century.

by Anonymousreply 25304/02/2021

R228, I tried to post videos DL would enjoy watching.

by Anonymousreply 25404/02/2021

There’s a quickly growing body of research in psychology about the beneficial effects of awe (feeling small in the vastness of the world but while feeling safe) on the body and mind. Hallucinogens do this synthetically by temporarily activating certain parts of the brain. That said, by listening to a beautiful music piece, seeing vistas yourself or even in a video, seeing something inspiring in nature, seeing a beautiful or powerful work of art, etc. can create beneficial effects that are lasting if you create enough awe experiences for yourself. Someone I know experienced awe simply by watching the series Planet Earth. Whether or not we use hallucinogens, creating opportunities for awe would be beneficial for everyone reading this thread in terms of mental and physical health.

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by Anonymousreply 25504/04/2021

[quote] The Kingdom of Heaven is inside you, right now.

Very true, R253.

by Anonymousreply 25604/04/2021

Ok. I am ordering it. $300 because I can't make it myself. I shall get it in two weeks and join you fine people in knowing the secret of life and not being depressed anymore.

by Anonymousreply 25704/04/2021

Acid Grandfather, is this true?

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by Anonymousreply 25804/04/2021

Ok got the stuff. BCappi and MHBark. I'm just boiling it together in a pot on med for 3 hours. That's it.

by Anonymousreply 25904/04/2021

R259 Psychotria viridis is gentler than mimosa is. You're planning to jump straight into something very potent and aggressive--so just brace yourself. You may give yourself quite a fright.

It sounds like you are very eager to make things happen, but patience would serve you well. You might be smart to take the caapi brew by itself the first time, without any additive at all. You will have a chance to understand the feeling of the vine first. By itself, it will still cause you to purge, and you'll still feel anxious and quite possibly will go into a deep, emptional trance state. You could possibly have dreamlike visions, as well. But no phantasmagorical light show. After taking just the caapi, you may be less likely to panic as the effects of the caapi and the mimosa both kick in. You need to prepare yourself so that you don't go into a panic as the effects settle in because if you panic, you will guarantee a very difficult journey. (It would still be worthwhile in the end, most likely, but a lot of time would need to pass before you felt it was worthwhile, and a 'bad trip' could be self-defeating. When people say you have to be in the right mindset and the right setting, it's true. So prepare yourself. Listen to other people's journey stories and realize that any and all of those things could happen to you. If you see an electrical grid blipping in and out before your eyes, or a giant snake, or geometric shapes that think out loud and speak by creating shapes, all of that is 'normal' and you will come back. But the greater challenge than a reality reset in the long run will be confronting your most personal traumas and insecurities, and you will have no choice but to honestly confront them. That will be liberating but the process of it will take a lot of emotional energy and you won't be able to opt out. So make a real, definite determination to yourself that you want and need to do it and you will not try to bail out. Trying to bail out = bad trip. Trying to go into denial = bad trip. It's like a drug addict signing up for a 28-day rehab center and then trying to run away as they are walking through the door. Had they not tried to run away, they'd go through a challenging process but it wouldn't be a horrible experience. If they try to run away, though, the guards will grab them and drag them into their room and everything that follows will feel like an assault. That is exactly how the spirit of ayahuasca works. Shortcuts are not ideal.

by Anonymousreply 26004/05/2021

R260 Speaks with a lot of wisdom here, pay attention (except for the analogy about signing up for rehab... huh?)

R258 Lots of different sources of a variety of chemicals which alter consciousness, lead to visions and insights, and change the channel for a short time or forever. I think if you're not familiar with how to prepare them, how to use them, what to expect and how to complete the journey, you really should stay away from them.

Intention (which has details like context, trust, internal readiness, experience - in addition to motivation) is important to determine what the experience will be. If you do work "before" the trip - meditation, yoga to center in the body, purging with teas or fasting, and critically - breathing, following the breath, trusting the breath etc. - doing this work may help make the experience deeper, more therapeutic, more likely to deliver insights.

Part of the context is having the plants (or chemicals, if you're going synthetic) prepared correctly, and if you're doing this the first time having somebody be a guide. Guide means someone who knows what they are doing and also, someone who is not high. Again, doing DMT for the first time really should be done under guidance.

If you are doing it just to get high, you'll get high. But what a waste of precious living, what a waste of sacrament. (And what an invitation of a bad experience.).

This may be too woo woo for some - but the Sacred Plants deliver best when respected. Doing Aya (or, in my old view, other high powered entheogens) simply to get high, to roll the dice for bliss... is like having a bottle of Domaine de la Romanee-Conti Romanee-Conti Grand Cru, Cote de Nuits, opening it and using it to cook chicken.

by Anonymousreply 26104/05/2021

R261 The point of the rehab analogy is to emphasize that working with ayahuasca can be likened to therapeutic self-improvement. It's not easy work. It's entirely rewarding work that is worth the effort. And you can choose how you participate: You can walk in willingly and cooperate with the system, which will give you a very challenging experience but one which will pay off for you in the end. Or you can go into the system, freak out and decide it's too hard for you, and end up being restrained and forced to do the work you sign up for. In a rehab facility, you'd be restrained by security and forced by counselors to do what you signed up for. In the context of ayahuasca, you'd be restrained and forced by ayahuasca to do what you signed up for if you enter into it and then freak out. So you have to go in with an understanding of both what you want to get out of it and that once you sign up for it, you're going to either participate willingly or be made to participate unwillingly. In the end, you'll benefit either way, but wouldn't you rather not make it harder than it has to be?

by Anonymousreply 26204/05/2021

R259 Bitch, you did not!

Home girl is about to have a South American jungle trip in her living room. 😂

by Anonymousreply 26304/05/2021

R261 I've only taken ayahuasca, but having done so, the idea of anyone taking it to get high for fun is alarming to me. That's why I keep emphasizing that it's not fun.

Even if a person can't make any sense of the notion and thinks it's ridiculously New Age, it would still be wise to *pretend* that ayahuasca is a teacher who commands respect or else will beat you up until you do. Because that is how it works. Even if a person doesn't attribute the effect to a living spirit, the reality is the same: using it to get high will not work. I think the most likely scenario would be that you'd be caught off guard when you find yourself emotionally on your knees and in an absolute state of awe and then you'd respect it or, less likely, you'd totally resist that what you're feeling and seeing is actually happening and you'll try to claw your way out of it...in which case, you'd get beat up the entire time it's happening and come out of it in a total state of alarm.

As I said, I've never taken any other psychedelic of any sort, but the latter point above is proved by Maureen Dowd's experience with edible marijuana. She had never taken marijuana in any form and decided it would be a good idea to write a column about her first experience in the New York Times after it was decriminalized in Colorado. So she few to Colorado, bought an edible brownie (or something) and took it back to her hotel room. The person who sold it to her told her to follow the instructions on the label and not to take more than one serving. She ate it, waited a short while, decided it didn't work, and so she ate the entire thing, which was 10 or 12 servings or so. She then felt the effects, freaked out, and it turned into a nightmarish trip because she was so unprepared, disrespectful and resistant to the experience after it started. She then decided as a result of her personal experience, which rejected everything she was told not to do, that marijuana is a dangerous drug and that it should be prohibited everywhere.

I imagine that she might have had a positive experience if she had been less cavalier, more respectful of the plant medicine, and if she had not been so eager to have a phenomenal fireworks show that she could brag about to everyone she knew. She fucked it up for herself by being arrogant.

Ayahuasca does NOT tolerate arrogance. Whether you see it as a divine entity or just a potent set of chemical compounds to be careful with, it pays off to humbly ask for insights from it. If you start a wrestling match, you'll look.

Take a look at pictures of the ayahuasca vine. This is what you'll end up psychically wrestling with if you don't approach it with humility and respect. It's a gracious being and it will not leave you hurt, but it will beat the shit out of you until you submit to it.

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by Anonymousreply 26404/05/2021

I realize the Tori Amos stuff might be annoying to people, but since this thread is about people's experiences and insights about ayahuasca, I'm going to post a few quotes from her because they're accurate in my experience:

[quote] "The drug which had a big effect on me was ayahuasca. It comes from a vine in the Amazon and you ingest it. You know that stuff they take in The Emerald Forest? It's like that. I was hanging around with some medicine women and they suggested I try it. I was very lucid, but felt like I was walking around Fantasia, having a conversation with myself. It isn't like acid. It's more emotional, more mental. But it can grab you by the balls and just shove you up against the wall. I've been in a room with a woman who was literally trying to bite her own arm off. And this lasted for 15 hours. I wasn't scared - just scared that I'd make a fool of myself. The funny thing was, I kept laughing and laughing, rather than sitting in the corner being intense. Then every so often, I'd say, I'm in a really rough patch. And one of the medicine women would come over and reassure me that everything was going to be alright. But it would keep on getting deeper. In the end, though, it was an educational experience. I learned a lot about myself. I haven't taken it in a couple of years now. You can only really do it once in a blue moon. But the wild thing is that sometimes I only have to smell something and I'm right back there again, high as a kite. It just happens."

[quote] "I find it [the truth] especially when I'm in an altered state. Music can put me in an altered state. So can hallucinogens. I have used hallucinogens and I do sometimes still use them to journey to another space. I don't use them to escape, but as a tool. And they have been helpful, but only because I have been working with people who have been in the Amazon and learned how to have visionquest. It's the idea of going into your psyche and knowing it more deeply. It's a complete wealth of information in there."

[quote] "I find it [the truth] especially when I'm in an altered state. Music can put me in an altered state. So can hallucinogens. I have used hallucinogens and I do sometimes still use them to journey to another space. I don't use them to escape, but as a tool. And they have been helpful, but only because I have been working with people who have been in the Amazon and learned how to have visionquest. It's the idea of going into your psyche and knowing it more deeply. It's a complete wealth of information in there."

[quote] "Um... the most influential journeys I have had have been with ayahuasca, the vine from the Amazon, the combination of that and mushrooms. It's very much a medicine woman, medicine man's journey drug, where you go inside. It's not a social thing. It's an internal experience. I experiment with things that are usually an internal experience, because that's just what excites me. And yes, it does sometimes give me visions. But my intention when I am doing it is very different than recreational. I don't do it recreationally. I do it to go do inner work, and I'm very clear before I do it what I'm searching for. That way, there's no abuse suffered and I don't rely on it. It's just one more tool that I use sometimes."

[quote] "Ayahuasca is a vine in Brazil in the Amazon - I've had it freeze-dried a few times - but the point is that it gives the medicine men vision down there, and I'd like to think that my concerts are like a journey you get from ayahuasca; that you go through an emotional journey."

[quote] "Ayahuasca...yes, definitely changed my perspective. And I would say to you that the work I did with it at the time, in the late 80s, early 90s, it affects me to this day insomuch as that it has opened up my perspective to realize I needed to listen. I needed to not speak all the time. I needed to listen, and see, and hear what people are saying to me or showing me, what the universe was trying to show me in the moment. It taught me how to do that."

by Anonymousreply 26504/05/2021

R265 Love it!

by Anonymousreply 26604/05/2021

R177, San Pedro is from the Andes (mountain region). Ayahuasca is from the Amazon rainforest. Where ayahuasca is feminine sacred plant, San Pedro is masculine. San Pedro was a very gentle and benevolent experience, filling you with love and positivity.

by Anonymousreply 26704/05/2021

LOL R263

by Anonymousreply 26804/05/2021

Is R259 still alive?

by Anonymousreply 26904/06/2021

Some of you should get a lot out of Alan Watts. I’ve started a thread on him (linked below).

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by Anonymousreply 27004/06/2021

Yes, I'm alive, thanks. It takes about a week for delivery. The B caapi will be here soon so I'll start that by itself.

Then the mimosa h will arrive and I will microsip it until I feel ready for trying the big breakthrough. Honestly guys a 6 hour journey doesn't seem like fun. If it's anything like the thinking and analytics I get into my head when I smoke weed 🙄.

by Anonymousreply 27104/06/2021

R271 Hopefully you won’t try to chew your own arm off!

by Anonymousreply 27204/06/2021

Nope. I will sip it. I will meditate before.

by Anonymousreply 27304/06/2021

R273 Mimosa won't be active on its own, only with the caapi. But you could drink caapi first and wait 20 minutes or so before the mimosa.

For whatever it's worth, my first ayahuasca experience was terrifying--just a feeling of panic and doom, no visions. The ones that followed were not. And my body does NOT like cannabis at all. I have smoked it once and took a medical tincture twice and it caused me to panic. It doesn't seem compatible with my psyche.

by Anonymousreply 27404/06/2021

Why is this thread grayed out?

by Anonymousreply 27504/06/2021

It’s not for me. Are you on “delicate flower” or “asbestos eyeballs”? 😂😂😂

by Anonymousreply 27604/06/2021

R274 Thanks. I ordered like 250g each and will ratio it out in equal parts. I will try boiling it separate and together. Just micro sips to start.

I wish I could use a pressure cooker or crock pot.

by Anonymousreply 27704/06/2021

R275 Big pharma doesn't want you to know there are other mental health alternatives to their endless cycle of meds

by Anonymousreply 27804/06/2021

This preparation made me laugh.

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by Anonymousreply 27904/06/2021

The caapi is about to arrive. I'm so happy!

by Anonymousreply 280Last Thursday at 12:46 PM

Oh hell no, R280. Are you ready?

by Anonymousreply 281Last Thursday at 2:30 PM

Yes. The caapi simmering. It smells bad. I see why people throw up.

I guess I'll french press it in 2 hours. I don't have a cheese cloth.

by Anonymousreply 282Last Thursday at 2:36 PM

Honestly not even sure it's going to work. Just looks like some shredded tree.

by Anonymousreply 283Last Thursday at 2:37 PM

R283 It is shredded bark. It's also a teacher. Remember that.

You will most likely have very mild psychotropic effects from taking Banisteriopsis caapi alone, so you may drink it and feel nauseated and then decide it didn't work. Don't be foolish. It is very mild on its own and the effects are not visual, but visionary--deep meditation in a trancelike effect. You may feel a heavy buzzing sensation and it's possible you'll feel panicked. It does smell bad and it tastes worse. But whether you get a potent reaction or a very mild one or feel nothing, it is working in your interest.

Do you know what kind of caapi vine you're working with? Black, yellow, cielo, red? They vary in intensity.

by Anonymousreply 284Last Thursday at 2:54 PM

It's yellow. I didn't know it varied by intensity.

I really want to drink it now but I guess it had to be 3 hours. It's just the caapi. The mimosa is coming from Netherlands in another week or so.

I also got my microdose mushroom capsules and took one today.

by Anonymousreply 285Last Thursday at 3:01 PM

R285 It does, although it also varies from individual plant to plant.

There's a reason the Tori Amos song above is called "strong black vine." Black caapi is usually the most potent. Yellow is the most traditional one and it should be easy on you.

by Anonymousreply 286Last Thursday at 3:06 PM

Thanks.

I wish I could have a meetup party or something and do this. In a real pot ceremony outside.

Do people see snakes because they're in the jungle? I'm going to lay in my hammock.

by Anonymousreply 287Last Thursday at 3:15 PM

I think it boiled out because I got about a coffee cup total. I drank it. I feel nice I guess. Lightheaded.

I'm listening to Grandma Willow from Pocahontas.

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by Anonymousreply 288Last Thursday at 3:32 PM

Put the phone away and close your eyes and listen.

by Anonymousreply 289Last Thursday at 4:02 PM

Ok. I will.

by Anonymousreply 290Last Thursday at 4:11 PM

R282 Share every detail of your experience here. In fact, commune with us whilst ascended.

by Anonymousreply 291Last Thursday at 4:18 PM

R286 Isn’t Strong Black Vine underrated? I think AAtS is in general.

by Anonymousreply 292Last Thursday at 4:20 PM

R286 I appreciate the song more than I enjoy listening to it. I realized why it's so discordant when I figured out what it's about.

by Anonymousreply 293Last Thursday at 4:30 PM

Isn’t that song “Two Vines” by Empire of the Sun supposed to be about ayahuasca?

by Anonymousreply 294Last Thursday at 4:32 PM

I don't think I drank enough. I kinda rushed the boiling by an hour. It was 3/4ths of a coffee cup.

Everything was just peaceful. It looked like there were diamonds in the trees. It was the sun behind the tree.

That's about it! Strange to think you can order some tree and boil it. I'll do it again but be more methodical about it. I spilled a pickle jar and was too distracted to see or hear anything.

No major insights or anything.

by Anonymousreply 295Last Thursday at 4:33 PM

R293 Yes, I understand 😂 I love Ophelia, though.

by Anonymousreply 296Last Thursday at 4:33 PM

R295 Chiiile. Has it even been an hour?

by Anonymousreply 297Last Thursday at 4:34 PM

R295 Are you being serious with us?

I don't know why you would have rushed it, but ayahuasca preparation typically involves simmering down three washes of water and then further concentrating the three concentrates into a thick, almost tarry viscous liquid. That can take eight to 12 hours.

It usually takes ~45 to 60 minutes or so before the effects begin, and then they last for five to six hours in most cases.

You didn't mention the taste, which is unforgettable, or purging...

by Anonymousreply 298Last Thursday at 4:40 PM

Yes, it has. I'm pretty big, 6 ft and hefty so I'll need more.

by Anonymousreply 299Last Thursday at 4:41 PM

R298 Oh! I didn't know that. I just simmered it for about two hours, drained it and drank what I drained.

You're supposed to make a tar?

by Anonymousreply 300Last Thursday at 4:42 PM

R296 I think the album is good and certainly underappreciated, but it's also very heavy and the only Tori album that actually makes me sad. I love Flavor, Fire to Your Plain, Give and Starling. I like Curtain Call a lot as a song but it's really depressing.

by Anonymousreply 301Last Thursday at 4:42 PM

Yeah it was nasty. I chugged it but it was less than a coffee cup. I'm trying to forget about it and hoping I won't be having accidents tomorrow.

by Anonymousreply 302Last Thursday at 4:44 PM

R300 Not tar, really. It should look like this. It gets thick, even a slight bit syrupy if you really concentrate it. It always will have particles that will settle and separate out a clearer liquid from a dark particulate one.

The point of doing multiple washes is to extract as much from the leaves as possible. Then you concentrate all the reduced liquid into about a cup or so. It should be a rich, dark brown, not a brownish or yellowish clear water.

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by Anonymousreply 303Last Thursday at 4:46 PM

This is it. This is what I boiled. A few handfuls of this.

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by Anonymousreply 304Last Thursday at 4:47 PM

Another view.

If it isn't this dark and opaque then you made a weak tea.

Patience is a virtue.

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by Anonymousreply 305Last Thursday at 4:48 PM

Ok. I guess I need to read more about how to make it thicker.

by Anonymousreply 306Last Thursday at 4:49 PM

R306 Watch this. He shows how to do it. It seems like you're intent on taking a shortcut, but you really should do multiple washes.

He says to use vinegar in the water. The reason for that is because the acid helps to extract the essence from the bark. You could use lemon juice in place of vinegar (which will make it taste more putrid), but you could also not use anything and get a less potent brew.

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by Anonymousreply 307Last Thursday at 4:52 PM

I did,but his caapi is a resin, no?

by Anonymousreply 308Last Thursday at 4:55 PM

R301 It was a necessary evil after the disasters that were TBK and ADP. Although I don’t really listen to them anymore, AAtS and MwG were when I realized she had hit her nadir and was on her way back. For that reason alone, I will always look on them bittersweetly. NoH and UG were breaths of fresh air and NI was a true return to form. Those last three contain some of her finest work, even when compared to her first 5 masterpieces.

by Anonymousreply 309Last Thursday at 4:55 PM

Did you puke? If you didn't, it wasn't quite done right.

by Anonymousreply 310Last Thursday at 4:57 PM

Ok. I see. It's a process.

Well, I had a nice little intro anyway.

by Anonymousreply 311Last Thursday at 4:57 PM

R308 Here's a better video showing how the caaapi is simmered down. The process is exactly the same, but I didn't realize he was using mimosa and adding a caapi resin until the end of that video.

The caapi resin he shows in the video above looks like what is left when you properly reduce the vine, except that it would be liquid. If you froze it, it would look like the resin he showed.

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by Anonymousreply 312Last Thursday at 4:59 PM

Ok I see, so they boil out the water. So it's supposed to boil out. I kept adding water, but that should be pulled.

I'm going to try the crockpot and coffee filter method to cook this.

by Anonymousreply 313Last Thursday at 5:03 PM

R309 I don't think either the Beekeeper or American Doll Posse is a disaster at all. I think the Beekeeper is a very good album, just a mature familial one, and American Doll Posse is all over the place but I love many if its songs. But that era wasn't her best albumwise. I didn't love Night of Hunters at first but it grew to be one of my favorites once I realized how brilliant it is. And I totally agree about Native Invader, although I believe Native Invader in great part to be a pop retelling of Night of Hunters. Battle of Trees = Wildwood, for example, and Fearlessness = Cloud Riders, Bang = Star Whisperer, etc. I think Native Invader was Tori's ultimate coming out as a shaman, and I think Midwinter Graces was her first foot coming out of the closet about that.

by Anonymousreply 314Last Thursday at 5:05 PM

Concentrate it by simmering.

My stomach hurts but I didn't throw up.

by Anonymousreply 315Last Thursday at 5:05 PM

My brew did not come through...

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by Anonymousreply 316Last Thursday at 5:07 PM

R313 I'm tellin' ya, this song is a key to understanding ayahuasca.

"Submission is my mission for a strong black vine. Your mission: concentrate! Yoo might just see that sweet Jesus."

Tori's big on double entendres. You have to submit your spirit to ayahuasca and let it have its way with you.

You also have to concentrate in two ways:

1. Concentrate the tea. Simmer it down slowly and concentrate it. Concentrating it means letting it evaporate so that it gets thicker and thicker. You seem not to have realized that, so you should realize that before next time.

2. Concentrate on your intention before drinking it and then set aside distractions and focus. If you're distracted, you might not get into the right state of mind to observe what you're hoping to understand.

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by Anonymousreply 317Last Thursday at 5:10 PM

R314 I absolutely love NOH - it’s in my top 5 - and did from day one. I felt like she was back in her element and doing what she does best. I also love the instrumental version of the album she released, which underscores her craftsmanship as a musician.

I like bits of TBk - Marys of the Sea, Martha’s Foolish Ginger, General Joy, Toast, Original Sinsuality, Barons of Suburbia, the bridge in Witness (“Is there anyone, is there anyone around...”) - but it doesn’t work for me as a whole. I really don’t like ADP and I forced myself to love it when it first dropped. I think I associate it too much with a very dark, drug fueled time in my life when I was bouncing all over the country like a cold, numb pinball. Still, it too has songs I like. That’s the thing with Tori: she’s never released an album I didn’t love at least some of the songs in.

by Anonymousreply 318Last Thursday at 5:13 PM

It's going to take my weekend. I'll report back on Monday!

Thanks for your help. I seriously thought it was a TEA like a watery tea. I didn't realize they concentrated it down into a goo.

My ear rang for like 3 secs.

by Anonymousreply 319Last Thursday at 5:15 PM

R317 See, you just reminded me that I secretly do love AAtS. As she said herself upon its release, it was her first personal album in a while - no concept except those harmless visualettes - and the darkness and pain she communicates in it is authentic, even if bleak.

by Anonymousreply 320Last Thursday at 5:17 PM

R318 I love Father's Son, Code Red, Beauty of Speed, Almost Rosey, Dark Side of the Sun, Smokey Joe, Dragon and Miracle.

I also love the bridge ("we could make it easy/easy, Love/easy...wrapped in metal/wrapped in ivy/painted in mint ice cream") of Bouncing Off Clouds. But the rest of the song doesn't really do much for me.

I find her concepts intriguing as the genesis or part of her creative processes, but I really just pay attention to the music. I never cared to learn her ADP characters and what songs go with which, and I never really paid attention to what gardens her Beekeeper songs belong to.

Scarlet's Walk was also a concept album and it is brilliant. It weaves together narratives about her life, about Native American people, about a character named Scarlet, about US history and about the geography as a sentient being and somehow it all works brilliantly. She also created an online "Scarlet's Web" component that I did click through to read the stories, but it's the songs that really matter.

The thing that put me off to Night of Hunters at first was the concept. When I read that her daughter plays a shapeshifting fox-goose spirit guide and her niece plays "the fire muse," I thought, Oh, Jesus, give me patience. But as ALWAYS with her music, I learned bit by bit what she was referring to and that her references were not just pulled from her ass and the album just revealed a whole world to me.

by Anonymousreply 321Last Thursday at 5:43 PM

Wow. I'm shitting water. Thanks!

Are there any other plants, trees etc that you recommend boiling? I'm guessing it's better to do this Saturday because of the side effects.

by Anonymousreply 322Last Thursday at 5:46 PM

[quote] Are there any other plants, trees etc that you recommend boiling?

Potatoes, carrots, etc., but I prefer them roasted, personally.

by Anonymousreply 323Last Thursday at 5:48 PM

I see this definitely isn't a light hearted little excursion. This is a full on journey. You really should be outside somewhere wearing depends and drinking until you puke and drinking some more until you surrender to Gaia or whatever you believe in. Into the fire you go.

by Anonymousreply 324Last Thursday at 6:02 PM

Thanks, r322, for letting us know how your first attempt at making the brew went and to the poster showing how to make it.

Very informative.

by Anonymousreply 325Last Thursday at 6:08 PM

R321 I love all of what you’ve mentioned from ADP, especially the BoC bridge, which I wish was longer and maybe even the whole.

Apropos enough, the concept to NoH - which, thankfully, she was subtle about - involves the main character (Tori) being guided into/through a peyote ritual!

by Anonymousreply 326Last Thursday at 6:18 PM

*the whole song

by Anonymousreply 327Last Thursday at 6:19 PM

You bitches have me contemplating undergoing a self-administered ayahuasca ritual in my living room now!

What are some reliable online shops I can purchase the fixings from?

by Anonymousreply 328Last Thursday at 6:20 PM

R326 Yes, the drink of the cactus practice. When she travels back to Ireland, there are also references to entheogens there:

[quote] At ten comes the vine/That generates bramble wine/The constant change of the night sun/A song in the blood of the white bull

[quote] From Ivy leaves is an ale that can unveil/The hidden meanings and serpents/Only revealed through visions

So Tori in the present and in her past life had relationships with these visionary plants, and a big part of the mythology of Night of Hunters and the spirituality of Native Invader relates to them. It's through the plants that she gains the vision and meets the entities that teach her how to shapeshift. And of course, American Doll Posse was all about exploring those different shapes. This has been a lifelong journey for her.

by Anonymousreply 329Last Thursday at 6:25 PM

R328 Maybe the others will know that. They can recommend the right two plant combos. It's basically a plant with DMT and another plant that opens that DMT up (by maoi).

Just set aside at least two days. One for prep, that's a lot of simmering down now, and the other in case it's like alcohol for you and you shit like mad the next day.

by Anonymousreply 330Last Thursday at 6:27 PM

R329 Yup. It’s obvious we’re both big fans, lol.

by Anonymousreply 331Last Thursday at 6:28 PM

And the hidden meanings and serpents she envisions in Battle of Trees, thanks to the vine, are retrieved from a lost past life.

And in "Virginia" in 2002:

So hundreds of years go by

(The red road carved up by Sharp Knife)

She's a girl out working her trade

And she loses a little each day

To ghetto pimps and presidents

Who try and arouse her turquoise serpents

She can't recall what they represent

And when you ask she won't know

by Anonymousreply 332Last Thursday at 6:28 PM

I was wondering if I could add a bit of cinnamon or honey to the brew to make it taste better?

by Anonymousreply 333Last Thursday at 6:32 PM

Ok, I tried it again. Again, just B Caapi by itself ( and I've been taking 1 microdose of shrooms in the morning for the past few days).

Um, this was a lot more intense. I froze the brew a couple of times because I read that helps break it down. I cut several lemons and squeezed them in. I boiled it down and french pressed it into a cup.

I did throw up, but strangely no no. 2 side effects like last time.

I'm a little disappointed because I feel like this was all projections of my own mind. I noticed whatever was in the environment, if it was two dots or something, my mind would attempt to make a person out if it. Sometimes they looked normal, sometimes quite frightening. Started worrying about dying from a bad reaction.

Honestly thought there was no way I could actually add DMT to this and make it even more intense. I didn't close my eyes and got some nice visuals If elderly people, living their lives. I saw a fast motion interaction of this family at a window, maybe a nursing home. I flew through the sky like a bird and dived down over water below and thought of "oh, I've missed this." I remember thinking something like, silly humans they think they're the only ones with feelings.

I had another weird thought. The plants produce this as a way to manipulate humans into caring for the environment so the trees survive. Not that that's a bad thing but it was a little sad. Like the bacteria that hijacks an ant's brain and makes it hang on a leaf so it can infect whatever insect eats it and spread.

by Anonymousreply 334Last Sunday at 8:33 AM

^^^ Anyway, maybe the worst part was the feeling that I am alone and it's just my brain on chemicals.

Not a trip to meet God or someone exciting. If that makes sense.

It is good to help you get to the truth if who you are at stop bullshitting yourself. Can see why it's not addictive because bad trips aren't fun.

by Anonymousreply 335Last Sunday at 8:37 AM

R257, I believe you may benefit from San Pedro Cactus in a controlled environment.

by Anonymousreply 336Last Sunday at 9:21 AM

R334 All the thoughts you had are common: the realization that human beings artificially separate ourselves from the rest of creation, the realization that the plants are communicating this way with people to get us to realize what we are doing to the planet. I hate to refer to it again, but read the lyrics to "Strong Black Vine":

[quote] Shut your mouth I'm spinning it tight down south I'm on a raid, tie you down 'Cause, boy, I can save you from that evil fate Eagles serve Yeah, uh huh, Mother first They turn you predator But, boy, I can save you from that evil fate

This is the vine ("spinning tight" refers to growth habit) telling human beings that Mother (Gaia/Earth) should be put first but we have become her predator. This relates to the thought you had, which you can interpret as your own or you can consider whether the vine actually can communicate telepathically.

[quote] Bodies bathe in black gold your pleasure Arms sold in balmy cities that may not be with us for long Save you from that evil faith, lay back

Balmy cities won't be with us for long because of climate change. The vine is trying to save us from our fate and the evil faith that is driving us to cause so much harm. Ayahuasca is a messenger from the planet to give up the false faiths and love mother Earth again.

[quote] Blown to bits Her innocent flesh to dust All for a dark God All for the love of some evil faith Swollen stream Every drip serpents bless You rape Earth knowledge Still she would save you from your evil faith

The vine has been "blown to bits" by being shredded to make your brew. Her innocent flesh has been pulverized for your purposes. You drink her and you forcibly imbibe knowledge of and from the planet--and still, she would save you from your evil faith if you listen.

Anyway. That's a song and you may or may not agree with the perspective, but I would encourage you to keep thinking about what you thought and experienced. You experienced banisteriopsis caapi.

People try to prepare for it but they focus on the DMT light show. I wrote extensively above that ayahuasca is not what people expect and it isn't fun and it isn't a hallucination: it's a telepathic communication. You go deeply into your own psyche and you are accompanied there by a guide who forces you to confront realities you've denied or ignored and supports you as you do so.

It feels a little like your thought except that it also feels a little like it's new information being imparted by someone else.

It feels a little like dreaming except that it's too vivid and clear and it has too much of a clear message to be a dream.

This would sound crazy to anyone who has not experienced it or who comes from a culture in which its use is not sacred, but when you take ayahuasca, you enter into a relationship with it. You will be tested. The panic you feel at first is akin to disorientation of going to a foreign country and trying to make sense of all the difficult to understand stimulus. When you use it serially, you mellow out as you understand what to expect--not just what happens, but how it feels, and how to communicate with it--and you learn more each time. More about yourself but also more about your place in this reality. Yes, the vine wants to convey an important message, but that doesn't make it a manipulation. It makes it an extraordinary, revolutionary breakthrough in communication between a human being and a species human beings thought were unintelligent because they don't speak languages with mouths. They can "mind meld" with you, and you just experienced that. The DMT is a gateway to other places but the vine is the communication of an intelligent, compassionate soul. There is nothing sad about it asking people to wake up and realize the harm we are causing to ourselves and everyone else.

by Anonymousreply 337Last Sunday at 9:47 AM

This will sound nuts to most people, but with successive ayahuasca experiences, I came to think of them as willingly lending myself over to being possessed, body and mind, by the spirit of the plant--a literal spiritial communion.

If you're Christian, that might seem blasphemous or something, but I'm not and it really is the best way to characterize how I felt it. I think if you think of it that way, then you'll go in with more appropriate expectations than if you expect to have an acid trip or something.

You have deeply significant epiphanies and you may also have significant (possibly worldview-changing) visions. Would it help to call it communion with God to make it more palatable and less confusing?

by Anonymousreply 338Last Sunday at 10:08 AM

R337 Interesting. When I was spinning, I felt like I was jumping up and down. This is going to sound stupid but I asked the plant in my stomach that if it was still alive and not dead, to please not kill me. I was afraid I was going to have a bad maoi side effect like serotonin syndrome or something.

They say there are energies with it like male, female, grandmother, grandfather. I didn't really feel that. I didn't see snakes. I did see my childhood fear of aliens which was disturbing. That's when I thought, oh this is in my head. It's just me. This my fear, not a plant trying to show me something. I could have gotten the same reaction with an artificial chemical compound. It's like it frees up the most disturbing recesses of your mind you have buried. That's the part I found sad, because it felt like this is your brain on drugs, a spectacle of up and down, zany emotions, not here is the great Mother Earth spirit. Maybe doing it alone had something to do with that.

by Anonymousreply 339Last Sunday at 10:17 AM

Another * insight * knowing everything is really boring and lonely. That's why God broke apart and we don't remember everything. That way we won't be lonely or bored.

I used to get so mad a God for not figuring out how to enjoy life with out the suffering part. I think they think it's inconsequential but it doesn't feel like it when you're here. They need to fix that.

by Anonymousreply 340Last Sunday at 10:33 AM

Also the Price is Right came on and felt like Bob Barker was a smooth black man in a past life. How much of this is just my fucking imagination and the tree life whispering secrets. Idk, it's conflated. I come away from this feeling like science is very important. Delusions are delusions.

by Anonymousreply 341Last Sunday at 10:36 AM

[quote] I come away from this feeling like science is very important. Delusions are delusions.

The science of ayahuasca use:

[quote] In the first assessment, nearly half (45%) of the naïve users were found to meet the diagnostic criteria for a psychiatric disorder. After the ayahuasca use, more than 80% of those subjects showed clinical improvements that persisted at 6 months. The questionnaires showed significant reductions in depression and psychopathology. Regarding sub-study 2, long-term users showed lower depression scores, and higher scores for self-transcendence and quality of life, as compared to their peers in sub-study 1. Further controlled and observational naturalistic studies assessing the eventual risks and potential benefits of ayahuasca are warranted.

Using it provokes curiosity and re-engages people with life that had become mundane, and so an interest in scientific knowledge-seeking is a natural outgrowth.

by Anonymousreply 342Last Sunday at 10:46 AM

Another study's conclusion:

[quote] This article has two important take-home messages: (1) the therapeutic effects of ayahuasca are best understood from a bio-psycho-socio-spiritual model, and (2) on the biological level ayahuasca may act against chronic low grade inflammation and oxidative stress via the Sig-1R which can explain its widespread therapeutic indications.

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by Anonymousreply 343Last Sunday at 10:49 AM

[quote] Not a trip to meet God or someone exciting. If that makes sense.

God isn’t that easy, toots!

by Anonymousreply 344Last Sunday at 8:51 PM

R337 I’ve told you so before in this very thread, but I want to meld with and have my own little “cactus practice” with you, you adorably enlightened being, you.

by Anonymousreply 345Last Sunday at 8:54 PM

Do you have to love Tori Amos to get Ayahuasca?

by Anonymousreply 346Last Sunday at 9:50 PM

R346 lol. No.

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by Anonymousreply 347Last Sunday at 9:53 PM

R346 lol no...Sorry, I know it must be annoying that I've quoted her and her lyrics here. I didn't do it to convert anyone to her fandom, but just because the thread OP asked for insights about ayahuasca and she is full of them. She's the first source of info about it I ever had, and her music helped me to integrate my experiences after they left me dumbfounded. So I was just sharing what helped me.

by Anonymousreply 348Last Monday at 12:53 AM

R348 The op is also a BIG Tori fan, so...

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by Anonymousreply 349Last Monday at 12:59 AM

I want to add MDMA/ecstasy to it so I love everything. So when I see aliens I don't freak out.

Is that ok?

by Anonymousreply 350Last Monday at 9:53 AM

R350, ayahuasca, in and of itself, is enough of an experience that it really should be done on its own. I can't imagine anything more piled on top of it.

by Anonymousreply 351Last Monday at 3:01 PM

R351 I think R350 is pretty obviously mocking everyone here.

by Anonymousreply 352Last Monday at 3:10 PM

R352 um, excuse me k, no.

Yes, I have an intense fear of aliens. I used to be terrified of them. I saw Fire in the Sky as a kid and felt they were real and at any second they could grab me and destroy me. I really feel like they are real.

Anyway, when I did the stronger b caapi it was at night and a shadow on my wall looked like an alien and I ran out of the room. Now, I'm never doing this at night again. I can get scared at night just in general. I looked at my ceiling fan and saw three grey aliens and that's when I was like aw, fuck. It's like my worst fear.

Anyway, my mimosa came. I'm boiling it tomorrow and it's currently freezing. I guess I will just take some sips of it because I don't want a bad trip. Someone said it would be gentle because it was yellow. Nope! Nope.

Now I did look up a breakthrough video and this made me happy. This gave me hope. Also heard another story about a guy who healed his friend in the bar.

Anyway I just want an experience like this. I just don't know how I'm going to do it if it starts turning bad. I swear to God I used to have such an intense fear if aliens. It's basically a clinical phobia. I cannot stress enough how it's basically my biggest fear especially at night.

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by Anonymousreply 353Last Monday at 6:25 PM

The day is fine. I'll be fine in the day. No night. Mistake.

by Anonymousreply 354Last Monday at 6:29 PM

Btw just like really? Really? It's that implausible to actually see aliens? Are you serious? When the pentagon has confirmed the ufo footage is real and people are flying out of their body into different realms.

Oh sure, I'm the weirdo. We're crossing over into different realms but there's no chance of seeing some unknown hostiles. Right.

by Anonymousreply 355Last Monday at 6:46 PM

“There are more things in heaven and earth [...] than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”

by Anonymousreply 356Last Monday at 7:24 PM

R353 You should have a sitter with you in case you freak out. Combining substances is reckless both for psychological and potentially for physiological reasons. What compels you to feel like amping up one of the most potent psychotropic medications in the world to improve it beyond how it has been perfected over centuries?

You may not be in the right mindset. You need to trust it and not try to make it better by controlling it.

Also, running out of the room in panic from the brew without DMT concerns me that you're going to totally panic and no one will be there to ground you. If you ended up in an ER talking about being attacked by aliens, they'd most likely load you up with psych medications that could be dangerous in combination with ayahuasca. At the very least, write down what you are taking and have that with you throughout just in case.

Finally, mimosa is very potent. It's a lot more potent than the traditional chacruna or chaliponga. If you're going to see aliens, mimosa is probably most likely of all of them to be your gateway. If you take a little and feel like too much time has passed and feel inclined to take a lot more, you'd be well advised to think twice.

I can't blame you for being eager for a potentially thrilling new experience, but between your inclination to take psilocybin, cannabis and MDMA with ayahuasca (why??), it really seems to me like you are going for a bazooka-blast dazzling drug high and possibly not for the spiritual experience that ayahuasca usually is. It's not crack or meth or heroin and it shouldn't be approached like it is.

Just my $0.02.

by Anonymousreply 357Yesterday at 1:50 AM

I'm just really excited to meet God and get answers. I've waited my whole life for this. Last night I sipped a tea spoon full of it and had nice dreams. It will be day and I never freak out during the day. I'll just sip a little to see.

I just freak out at night in general. I'm a spaz.

by Anonymousreply 358Yesterday at 5:50 AM

Btw the conquistadors thought it was a devil brew.

by Anonymousreply 359Yesterday at 5:53 AM

Set and setting are always, always said by experienced people including clinicians who administer psychedelics to be the most important part of any psychedelic experience.

Set is mindset. If you're calm, open, relaxed and optimistic, then you're far more likely to have an awe-inspiring but not traumatic experience. If your mindset is fearful, anxious, paranoid or if you go in feeling like you're endangering yourself and regret it after you take the substance, then you are very likely to have a very bad trip. Most people still say that their bad trips were good for them in the long run, but in the short term (and rarely in the long term, as well), a very bad trip can be traumatic and can even cause PTSD. Advice to OP: If you're planning to load up your ayahuasca with other drugs and you go in fearing aliens are going to abduct you and do terrible things to you, then *YOU* are setting yourself up for a very bad experience. And you inevitably would blame the medicine. Please take seriously what you're doing and why. Adding MDMA, psilocybin or other medicines is not the way to go. South American shamans say "Ayahuasca is not a drug. It's a medicine." The shamans who administer it are called cuanderos--those who cure, healers.

Setting is where you take it. Most people take it in a version of a traditional setting--if not in the Amazon or the Andes, then at least in a group setting with a trained professional medicine person there to guide you, able to calm you down if necessary, and able to take medical action in the rare case it could become necessary. Given your inexperience, your setting (being alone) may not be the best for you, particularly because you're afraid you're going to be possessed by alien demons.

If you can learn to let go, to take your time, to accept what is given rather than greedily expecting full-on enlightenment by combining a bunch of drugs, and so thinking of it as a threat to you, then you'll be fine. But you do have some factors working against you.

Expect nothing. Hope for the best. Trust that it knows what it is doing and it will give you what you need--nothing more than you can handle--and you will be absolutely fine. But if you demand more than it can give, you're likely going to bring yourself disappointment either by lackluster experience or else by a totally overwhelming one that terrifies you.

I believe part of the reason it inspires such deep panic at first is to test people, to find out if they are really committed and willing to go with what is given, or else freak them out so as not to give them more than they can bear. It's a screening process.

You must think of it as a teacher. It knows what it is doing. When you walk into a classroom expecting your teacher to download the content and capacity of Einstein's mind to you on day one, you're going to have a terrible attitude toward your teacher, and your teacher is going to kick you out and not give you the lessons you need to know if you want to see what Einstein saw one day. Does that make sense?

by Anonymousreply 360Yesterday at 5:57 AM

R359 If you're a judgmental, fearful crusader for Christianity who kills everyone who thinks anything different than what your Bible teaches, and you end up in a mind meld with a wise plant spirit, then you're going to believe it's a seductive brew of the devil because it's going to show you realities that you've been trained all your life to reject as false and dangerous.

by Anonymousreply 361Yesterday at 5:58 AM

You can't always get what you want.

You can't always get what you want.

But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you NEED.

by Anonymousreply 362Yesterday at 9:06 AM

Ugh this stuff is awful. I only had two sips and threw up. How do people even get it down? I don't know how I'll ever be able to ingest it. It's disgusting.

Fuck this shit!

by Anonymousreply 363Yesterday at 9:10 AM

R363, it's not called The Purge without reason.

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by Anonymousreply 364Yesterday at 10:50 AM

Look at her heartily drinking this like it's delicious. Lies!

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by Anonymousreply 365Yesterday at 1:03 PM

You suck up your courage, you drink it, you purge, you move on.

Countless people have done it. It's not that big a deal.

by Anonymousreply 366Yesterday at 1:24 PM

It made a centimeter thick paste at the bottom. Do I eat that?

by Anonymousreply 367Yesterday at 4:31 PM

YES I do! Thanks 😊

by Anonymousreply 368Yesterday at 4:50 PM

R367 😂 Your whole trajectory on this thread is both hilarious and endearing.

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by Anonymousreply 369Yesterday at 4:51 PM

Thanks 😊 I'm really sad I threw out the other paste. It's a learning experience.

by Anonymousreply 370Yesterday at 5:37 PM

And thanks Tori Amos

by Anonymousreply 371Yesterday at 5:39 PM

Btw, it's amazing! Simply amazing.

by Anonymousreply 372Yesterday at 9:04 PM

Ayahuasca Trip Report.

So I ate the paste and I felt euphoria. I went outside and the trees looked so nice, almost formidable. They felt very alive and just as important as humans. I came inside and stared at a colorful piece of artwork. It started looking like those holographic images you see. At one point it almost seemed like some figures were coming out of it. I saw some interesting shapes and triangles.

Then I felt more euphoria. It was almost too much. Like smiling really big when you may not want to smile.

I don't think about, ruminate or analyze anything. I was focusing on the physical feelings because this was my first experience. I got a pop-up thought of my sister and just thought, no I'm good. I don't need to relive all the psychological trauma and guilt right now.

When I laid down to go to sleep, well, I could not. I got all the fun house clown, 60s checkerboard patterns. I was just like...ok. A little annoying when you want to go to sleep. Then I saw all these ancient people and vines everywhere, all kinds of stuff. At this point it had been several hours. I tried to get mad at it but I just gave up.

Then something weird happened. I had to get up and go to bathroom or throw up, water something. When I got up I was effortless light. I could not feel my body. I was really puzzled, like normally there is a heaviness, when picking something up. I didn't feel it all. When I moved, it felt like I was thinking it and making it happen but not feeling it. That set me into debating if it had numbed my pain receptors so I could not feel or if something else was going on. I looked back in my bed to make sure it wasn't an out of body experience, but my body wasn't there.

I want to say it almost felt like a big secret. Like I'm wearing a suit body and agreeing to pretend to feel this body and go through certain limitations here. I started wondering if life was all a delusion and if we're really here . The feeling of my body came back in a few minutes. I was glad because I did not want to stop this life. Almost a feeling of like being strapped back in a racecar to finish the race.

I'm not sure how deep I went. Next time, maybe in a month I will do this in nature, in the early morning, before prayers. It's took long of an experience.

by Anonymousreply 37312 hours ago

[quote] I started wondering if life was all a delusion and if we're really here...The feeling of my body came back in a few minutes. I was glad because I did not want to stop this life.

I shared both of these perceptions. It has changed my whole worldview and my life experience to understand that life is an illusion while also feeling that I want to be taking this ride. As someone who had been depressed most of my life, this lowered the stakes and makes me feel less often like events are crises, and at the same time gives me a little propulsive anxiety when I remember that yes, I want to be here. I chose to be here. And it's all an illusion, and so it's not that big a deal! Enjoy it all you can. The ride will be over too soon.

Take a break now and let your mind ruminate on all the perceptions you described. It's a treasure trove of wonder. It's like being a kid again.

by Anonymousreply 3748 hours ago
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