Insist on being called Doctor or Professor. Demand peer-reviewed sources for everything, even banal comments like, 'Nice weather, isn't it?'
If butch, open car doors for their femme in a way that would have Scarlett O'Hara rolling her eyes.
Know they'll never have an attractive partner so say things to themselves and others like, 'I fall in love with souls. The physical is so superficial. Confidence in a huge gunt is what's really sexy.'
Write mystery novels with cat detectives.
Insist they can fix ride-on mowers even as the lawn gets to the point where people who don't even live in the neighborhood complain.
Feel momentary shame at all the processed food they buy when unpacking their groceries, then forget about it spend the rest of the week binging on it.
Bring bread pudding to the table while singing Blue Denim by Stevie Nicks, but with the lyrics 'blue denim' changed to 'bread pudding'.