Dialing the phone with a pencil

'Fess up, you guys --- each and every one of you "sampled" Mom's make-up from time to time, now didn't you.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 09:46

Did you walk around with a towel turban after taking a bath? only after a bath? hell i did this all the time and the bigger the better. i used to make towel turbans out of bed sheets. I could get the thing to stand a good 24 inches high. i could balance the thing in a hurricane if i had to. my mother started locking her jewelery box up after she caught me one too many times fastening a big brooch on the front and clipping matching earings on the edges of the towel where my ears would have been. my poor parents, i would not only do this inside, i would do this all over the neighborhood and usually while sporting a slip my little friend let me wear.

I was 5 or 6.

Once, our family was getting redy to go somewhere special. I could feel the excitement in the air as my mother darted around trying to make sure she looked absolutely stunning. The more effort she put into getting ready, the more important the occasion. This was VERY important by all the commotion coming from her bedroom. I thought it would be a good idea if I made a special effort for this occasion and donned blue eyeshadow and mascara. There i was, sitting in the living room waiting for everyone to come down, painted up like a 7 year old floozy when my mother came down. She didn't notice at first, but when she did...holy cow! I have never before or since seen such fireworks!

Good God, I was [am] sooooo gay!

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 09:52

you're all fat

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 10:00

I remember watching Maude and she would walk around with one arm bent and the wrist hanging. I thought it looked so cool, I began walking around with a limp wrist ALL the time!

In Kindergarten, the teacher asked us our favourite TV shows. Everyone said HR Puff'n'Stuff, the Banana Splits, The Flintstones,...

I said "The Edge of Night"

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 10:05

I always wipe my silver with a Kleenex when I dine. It's autumn at The Automat.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 10:16

There were times when I put on my mother's false eye-lashes.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 10:59

I love these stories! I used to pretend to smoke with pencils, or just imaginary cigarettes as it was so 'glamorous.'

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 12:41

Did all you people grow up to be drag queens?

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 12:51

I want to know how old most of you are. (I'm not the guy who asked the drag queen question). Though someone did mention Dynasty. I actually emulated queeny guys: the Uncle Arthur laugh-- not very good at it since I always ended up coughing, the Davie Bowie hair and make-up circa Ziggy Stardust-- hard to do the hair since school policy dictated we had to wear it very short, and the incredibly tight pants (sans underwear) of the Hardy Boys-- boy was I surprised at the reaction that got.

I did think cigarette holders were cool, though again I think it was because I saw Bowie with one, and I wore mascara and eyeliner when I went out on Saturday nights hoping to look like a "rock star." But I think of it all as the same old drag, just the 70's version.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 13:11

Did all you people grow up to be drag queens?

No, in fact I went to college on a football scholarship.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 13:56

My favorite scene of a woman dialing a phone with a pencil can be seen in The Birds, when Tippi Hedren calls up her father at the petshop.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 14:05

.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 19:31

The pencil/phone thing can ALSO be very very creepy. I offer up the scene in Fatal Attraction where Glenn Close/Alex Forrest is sitting on her bed madly dialing Michael Douglas' number as her stalking intensifies. And we all know how THAT ended!

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 19:42

Gay little boys LOVE to be glamorous! I loved going to weddings and getting dressed up. On the ride there I pretended I was riding in a limo and I wouldn't get out until dad would open the door. Then at the reception I tried to be in as many pictures as possible. I remember getting in so much trouble for jumping on stage and trying to sing "Snowbird" acapella while the band was taking a break.

by: anonymous 09/27/2003 @ 22:58

One ringy dingy (snort)!

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 00:02

How about sauntering around the house in Mom's high heels when no one was home?

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 00:13

My mother used to have this fabulously horrible heavy wool plaid coat with fake fur trim, that I absolutely LOVED wearing when no one else was at home. I would wrap it around me, and draw the fur trim close to my face, pretending I was Lara in Dr. Zhivago. Of course my mother also had lots of wigs, wiglets and falls at home, so I'd COMBINE them to create a horrid "Eva Gabor meets Cindy Wilson" look, then pose just like those insipid close-ups of Julie Christie.

I never played in my mother's make up myself, but I'd always put it on my (younger) brothers and then dress THEM up in clothes. My crowning achievement was putting dark foundation on my youngest brother, and creating a LaWanda Page character, complete with the circular old church lady hat, dress and purse ( I actually cut plastic netting from a dishwasher scrubber to create the veil).

I took a Polaroid picture of that creation, but have since lost track of it. A pity, since I posed him in just the right "I'm gonna git you sucka!" pose.

by: Nancy Nurse 09/28/2003 @ 08:19

I loved that thread.

KISS KISS KISS to you, OP.%0D %0D This was the funniest thread ever on DL.

More, OP, more! You've satirized one of the warhorse thread types, the inane subject. Would love to see you take on the political threads and also the show biz ones. However, most of those threads are ridiculous enough as they are without gilding the lily.

Would love to see OP lampoon the idiotic threads questioning the existence of bisexuality.

This is no lampoon, this was the beginning of perhaps the most classic thread in DL history.%0D %0D OP, do you have the rest?

Well, I%E2%80%99m satirizing anything! I was cleaning out my computer and ran across this thread and decided repost some of it as it%E2%80%99s frequently referenced as one of the most loved threads in DataLounge history. I loved it enough to save it off, so figured people might like a little taste of it. I%E2%80%99d forgotten it was so long ago!

Love the idea of a "fabulously horrible heavy wool plaid coat with fake fur trim" -- so glad the fur trim was fake.

Best thread ever! OP, thanks for reminding us to laugh at ourselves.

Thanks OP. I know I have the first few pages of [italic]"What Was Your Favorite Helen Lawson Show?" stored somewhere.[/italic]

More please, OP!

Mother had a special gossip bench that was perfect for dialing the telephone with a pencil...

While some of you clearly had some odd affectations why on earth was this thread considered a 'classic'?

What ever happened to your youngest brother 8:19AM? Did he turn out to be a drag queen or did he compensate by becoming a muscle stud?

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 14:00

Here's 8:19's little brother. He no longer looks like LaWanda Page.

see link

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 14:17

Gay things you did when you were a kid: the sequel

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 14:26

When I was 7, I saw a rerun of "Love, American Style" that featured a stripper. She just got up in front of the male characters in the sketch, and let a long, hooded robe slip off her while she danced. I immediately went to my room, took off all my clothes, wrapped myself in an afghan, and tried to act it out in front of a mirror. My Dad caught me and yelled at me to get my goddam clothes back on.

by: Darren 09/28/2003 @ 14:27

Now that you're on your own, Darren, do you ever do your afghan act?

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 14:31

"Let me entertain you, and we'll have a real good time."

by: Gypsy 09/28/2003 @ 18:21

I wanted to be Tina Louise, singing that Let Me Entertain You song. She was so glamorous as Ginger Grant.

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 18:29

"I wanna be loved by you, by you, and nobody else but you. I wanna be loved by you, alo-oooo-oooo-ne. Boop boop be doop."

by: anonymous 09/28/2003 @ 18:30

YAY for OP! And R11 PLEASE start posting it!

At the dime store...'65/'66, w/my mother...I saw this clear plastic thing w/a point on one end, and a little ball on the other. Asked her what it was..."that's what ladies use to dial telephones with, so they don't eruin their nails, and the other end is a letter opener." She bought it for me, but I just left it by the phone in the kitchen, since I was 8, and did not get many letters or phone calls then!!!

by: anonymous 10/09/2003 @ 17:59

What's Nicks brother's name? And why isn't he my boyfriend?

by: anonymous 10/09/2003 @ 18:01

Dear queen of the snatchlickers, I bow in your presense. Dearest? The facts remain...

me=loved, popular, sophisticated.

you=bitch wannabe who never will be.

by: anonymous 10/09/2003 @ 18:06

Dear queen of the snatchlickers, I bow in your presense. Dearest? The facts remain...

me=loved, popular, sophisticated.

you=bitch wannabe who never will be.

by: anonymous 10/09/2003 @ 18:06

>> I just saw an episode of the Jessica Simpson Newlywed show and Nicks brother walks around in a towel turban for 5 minutes. I guess that is part of his shower routine. What else was he wearing? He's got a hot bod like his brother. I hope he showed a lot of skin.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 08:07

I used to use a clean dishcloth with a rubber band around it to make the ruffly "night cap" worn by Mary and Laura Ingalls on "Little House on the Prairie." I could never understand the importance of wearing a frilly lacy thing on your head to go to bed, but it had a very captivating quaint glamour, all the same.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 08:30

When it's cold, you lose a lot of body heat through the top of your head. In the olden days, when they had no central heat, people wore nightcaps.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 08:36

they also *took* nightcaps, by the gallon if you happenned to be married to a particularly uggo woman.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 08:43

>>>Why didn't your'alls ... I thought that your'alls was a mountain range in Russia.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 08:44

The nightcap was also supposed to keep a woman's hair in "place" somewhat since people didn't bathe but, like, what, once a week or a month?

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 08:46

how adorable! god, i hope my son does all of that! i am only letting him watch old hollywood movies - no disney.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 10:35

I love the black clutch story, it's adorable.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 11:01

This is a great thread. It warms my cockles, er, bangles.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 11:33

Add me to the list of "Ginger Grants". When we played this we would steal a shirt from my sister's bed that had the leopard printing on it and we would wrap it around us like her cut on the bias dresses and walk around on our tip toes. Then we would pretend to make banana cream pies in our best evening wear. My grandma used to sleep with a nightmask to keep out the light in the morning. I took one home with me after a visit. It had some frills on it and I used to put it on in the morning and wear it like the glamorous women in the movies did. When I woke up I would push up the mask and scrunch up in my bed to get ready for the domestic help I would imagine would be brining me 'my tray' soon. I'm sure my mother thought I was nuts.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 11:54

I used to wear a shower cap and use a long handled back brush when I had a bath, then my mom would come in, dunk me, wash my hair and let me put the shower cap back on to finish my bath. I also dialed the phone with a pencil, and always gave out my number as the old fashioned SW3-XXXX instead of 793 because I thought it sounded more glamorous.

by: anonymous 10/14/2003 @ 11:55

bump

I'm Nancy Nurse, and no my youngest brother didn't grow up to be a drag queen -- he played football in high school and college, and has a family.%0D %0D Totally straight, but very gay-friendly!%0D %0D I just wish I had that photo to whip out at family gathering, LOL!

Yeah!!! I'm so glad to see someone from the original thread responding!

Thanks Nancy Nurse.

Nancy Nurse's post was my favourite.

I posted to that thread (won't say which contribution was mine).

I'm more blown away by the fact that that thread is from 2003! I can't believe it's been seven years since that thread was around. Wow.

AWESOME. Thanks for posting, OP.

Thanks for posting this, OP; it's the only "classic" thread that I was anxious to see.%0D %0D Having seen it, however, I'm left scrtaching my head (like R14), wondering what all of the fuss is about. %0D %0D It's a little like being told for years about the fabled Golden Age of Television, only to finally get a chance to see it, in the form of some Burns & Allen schtick.%0D %0D Maybe you had to be there...

I don't get what is classic about silly childhood affectations either.

The thread was an offshoot of "Earliest Indicators You Were Gay" and it was heartwarming to read how many of us had some similar experiences in our childhoods. I suspect DL's demographic has changed quite a bit in the years since so that it doesn't resonate with as many people today. Or as r26 says, maybe you had to be there.

I loved that thread. I'm a straight chick who wandered into that thread and thought you all soundeded really cute and immediately recognized some traits of little boys I'd known and played with as a child.%0D %0D Now I will scuttle out before I get called a gash or fish.

What's sad is that the webmaster can't be bothered to store the classic threads any longer, which forces the OP to take action like this.%0D %0D WTF? How much space would this thread take? Like, 100 MB?

I think it was so funny at the time because it was the first such thread where people wrote their affectations. We've had dozens of similar threads since then and it's kind of diluted the funny-ness of "Dialing the Phone.."

lol r13, I need a "gossip bench"!

[quote]WTF? How much space would this thread take? Like, 100 MB?

It's just text stored in a database. It would be more like 50 kb, max.

My Grandmother had a black rotary dial desk top model that had a sort of gravely sound when dialing with various and sundry objects. I wish I'd nabbed that when she passed, have not seen one since.

I have one, R34. A cat knocked a glass of Kaluha & milk over onto it, so the dial is a little slower & scratchier sounding than it used to be, but it works fine.

I love that, R-35! I think I'll seek one out on Ebay or a junk shop.

As I recall, the original thread went on for over a hundred posts and the response were very diverse. I think everybody managed to see something of their childhood in it.

But yes,of course DL denizens of today would find it boring because we weren't on facebook and didn't tweet about ti.

Enjoy this thread while you can, because it will probably be gone when the webmaster purges again.

R36, you'll probably have to add the sticky drink to it yourself, or get a clumsy cat to help you with that part.

I wonder what was spilled on Myrtle's?

bump

Way before my time on DL, but I already love the thread.

I used to pay my brother fifty cents to be my servant for the evening. He was only allowed to speak to me after I had climbed into bed when my mother was out- I had her crystal bell to call him- he was not allowed to speak to me until after I had rung for him. He would bring me chocolates, drawn my bath, and had a warmed towel ready for me.

R43, just out of curiosity, what is your relationship like with your brother now?

R43's thread is even creepier than finding out Max was married to Norma in Sunset Blvd.

OP- please find the Anubis cane post. That left me crying.

bump

$2 bill.

I'm with you r46- Anubis! *shakes cane*

Dialing the phone with a pencil originated on the soap opera "Another World", with the Beverlee McKinsey socialite character, Iris Carrington.

Her manner had a profound effect on those viewers who would grow up to be homosexual.

I definitely remember this thread. It was quite bittersweet for me as I was quite a flamboyant child, but being in a conservative family in a rural town it was forced out of me.

I often wonder how much better my life would be if I'd grown up in a better place and time, and with liberal parents.

Can't believe it's been ten years!

I can't remember it exactly. There was a great one where the son came into the living room, where his dad was entertaining colleagues, and said to the bemused audience - 'I'm taking a poll. Who's prettier - Florence Henderson or ... ' Does anyone remember who the other woman was?

Shirley Jones was the other.

bump

WOW!

All you people sound fat. Fat fingers, too fat to dial the phone.

skinny fingers are perfect for princess phones

Thanks OP!! I loved this thread. W & W for you!

bump

DIAL

Friday is DIal Day

My all time favorite DL thread.

Take that, annoying Gay Bras.

bump

OP, any chance you also have "Red Dragon Cheese" lying around?

Thanks!

....

C'est Chic!

every gay boy did this

retro bump

issy man pump

I used to flounce around the house wearing my sheet cape, which was fastened at the neck by one of my grandmother's brooches, usually (paste) emerald or ruby. It was during my "director" period, in which I would have kids from the neighborhood act out scenes from my Classics Illustrated comic books, usually A TALE OF TWO CITIES or THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO.

And then there was my Cher period: towel turban and hairbrush mike, singing along with "I Got You, Babe," "Baby, Don't Go," and the entire "All I Really Want to Do" album.

And they said they had no idea.

girly men

R72 = perceptive of the obvious

men who love the feminine

Like Andy Taylor, I just pick up the phone and ask Sarah the telephone Operator in Mayberry to connect me when I need to call Aunt Bea.

Rip Taylor dials a phone to this day

Datalounge has finally gone the way of Hollywood with no more original ideas.

This is like a sad, unasked for remake of a classic movie.

we don't need another hero

we need more lesbians!

J'adore R71.

Wow, I missed this in April but I am one of the old timers who remembers this thread from way back. Thanks, OP.

"Dialing the phone with a pencil" has been a useful catchphrase for me ever since. Hard to believe it's been 13 years.

People are obsessed with this thread, aren't they?

I can't get enough

At least one of those posts was mine. Thanks for the nostalgia.

Bumpo

I love the pencil

Don't know why they closed the thread, but here is one of (sadly not the original) "Childhood indicators that you were gay" thread:

This may be the funniest thread ever.

How about the kid who was singing “wouldn’t you like to ride in my beautiful balloon” out his upstairs window and his mother sent his sister to tell him to stop.

Bump to save this gem.

[Quote] I heard that it was confetti Gwen Verdon inhaled during "Chicago"; I remember calling Lenox Hill Hospital when I was a kid to inquire how she was after surgery, but they wouldn't give me any information.

You queens have no dignity. You should never admit to any of this least your balls will fall off.

[quote]least your balls will fall off.

Oh, dear.

Oh dear indeed

[Quote] When I was in the 4th grade my Rona Barrett magazine with Valerie on the cover was confiscated by my teacher and torn apart in front of the class. It was heartbreaking, but I kept quiet while it was happening to save myself from the embarrassment of owning the magazine. I had it hidden in my notebook but a bully saw it, took it away from me and gave it to the teacher knowing that she was destructive of other people's property. Hearing the news of her passing brings back the feelings of loss I had back then. It's as if she died twice.