What is the dumbest lyric in popular music since the start of the rock era?

“We are living in a material world and I am a material girl “. Whatever.

#1 song at the moment:

She's the baddest of them all The baddest of them all She's the baddest of them all The baddest of them all She's the baddest of them all The baddest of them all She's the baddest of them all The baddest of them all Do you wanna dance, baby? I know you see me lookin' at you on the daily Ooh, I'm in a trance lately I need something to wake me up, something to faze me Do you wanna dance, baby? I know you see me lookin' at you on the daily Ooh, I'm in a trance lately I need something to wake me up, something to faze me

"My humps, my humps. My lovely lady lumps."

I'm convinced that at least half of the instances of misheard lyrics is our brains trying in vain to make sense of dumb lyrics.

One of my all time favorite songs is a Reba deepcut "You Remember Me." I always thought the lyric was "tomorrow night it's Calvary, and you'll be good and rid of me." Which fits with the rest of the song, that mentions stained glass windows and has a vaguely spiritual and/or mysterious epic feel of the song. But, it isn't Calvary it is Calgary, which robs the song of so much. So to me that one word is the dumbest lyric. Because it sinks an otherwise wonderful song.

The entirety of You're beautiful-James Blunt

There are perhaps worse lyrics than these, but they annoy me especially because its a popular song considered "deep" by some.

Someone left the cake out in the rain.

Push push in the bush.

I'm serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer.

That thong th-thong thong, thong

This.

Marconi plays the mamba, listen to the radio....

R5 I've never once heard of someone thinking it was "deep."

"Lick it up!!!!! LICK ETTTT UPPPPP! WHOAOH-OHHHH-OHH!"

He's a bad mammy jammer.

"Tonight there's gonna be a jail break ... somewhere in this town."

You can stand under my umbrella You can stand under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh Under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh Under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh Under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh

My humps!

My humps!

My lovely lady lumps!

Whatcha gon' do with all that junk

All that junk inside that trunk?

Imma get, get, get, get you drunk

Get you love drunk off my hump!

And I said, "What about Breakfast at Tiffany's?"

She said, "I think I remember the film;

"And as I recall I think we both kinda liked it"

And I said, "Well, that's the one thing we've got"

“A bathtub of gentlemen only turns me off”

🎵 my neck, my back, lick my pussy and my crack 🎵 Doesn’t the crack come before the pussy?

"Only time will tell if we stand the test of time" - Van Halen

"Song she sang to me, song she BRANG to me" - Neil Diamond, Play Me

"Don't go chasing waterfalls, please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to" - TLC, Waterfalls

Lucky that my breasts are small and humble so you don’t confuse them with mountains!

"You're a vegetable."

Goo goo goo joob

Get on up, on the floor 'Cause we're gonna boogie oogie oogie 'Till you just can't boogie no more

It’s no use, he sees her / He starts to shake and cough / Just like the old man in / That book by Nabokov

That Gwen Stefani song talking about donuts and pastries.

R6 Bernice Clifton! How ya been?

“Jesus take the wheel.”

I think I first heard it during a period when I was attending AA meetings and there was a lot of stuff along those lines - just accepting, trusting in your higher power. I remember sitting in meetings and thinking, “Jesus isn’t going to drive your car for you.” Then I heard that some on the radio a day or so later. It must have already registered in my subconscious.

If you're searching for dumb lyrics, look for any song by Yes or Rush.

Baby you could light up the dark like a solarscape.

Papa, don't preach.

I'm in trouble deep.

Putting the adjective after the noun just to rhyme is done in mediocre poetry.

I can't remember the song or the singer (I think it might have been MC Hammer), but he rhymed "above" with "Dove."

He literally meant Dove the soap because he couldn't think of any thing else to rhyme above with.

If I were a sculptor

But then again, NO.

Little early birdie came by in his curlywurly and asked me if I needed a ride.

Love love me do

Last night I heard my mama singing a song Ooh wee, chirpy chirpy cheep cheep Woke up this morning and my mama was gone Ooh wee, chirpy chirpy cheep cheep Chirpy chirpy cheep cheep chirp

“The tears are in my mind and nothin' is rhyming“ - Mandy, Barry Manilow

"Macaroni in a pot, that’s some wet-ass pussy",

Girls, we run this mutha (yeah) Girls, we run this mutha (yeah) Girls, we run this mutha (yeah) Girls, we run this mutha, girls Who run the world? Girls (girls) Who run the world? Girls (girls) Who run the world? Girls (girls) Who run the world? Girls (girls) Who run this mutha? Girls Who run this mutha? Girls Who run this mutha? Girls Who run this mutha? Girls Who run the world? Girls (girls) Who run the world? Girls (girls) Who run the world? Girls (girls) Who run the world? Girls (girls)

“ I've overheard your theory, "Nostalgia's for geeks" I guess sir, if you say so, some of us just like to read One second I'm a Koons fan, suddenly the Koons is me Pop culture was in art, now art's in pop culture, in me”

Bloody hell

If you love somebody, set them free"

We get it, Sting. You saw a poster in Spencer Gifts once and wrote a song about it. Big deal

Fly Robin flyyyyy

I’ve always hated Shower the People by James Taylor , not so much for the actual lyrics but the way he says THEE instead of the:

“Shower THEE people, show them THEEE way..”

Why?!?!!

Respectfully I say to thee

Animal! Animal! I wanna get animal. Let’s get into animal.

I want your sex

I kissed a girl and I liked it. The taste of her cherry chapstick. I kissed a girl just do try it. Hope my boyfriend don't mind it.

Mouth & MacNeal - "How Do You Do"

Lyrics:

I thought Wa - na- na- na

And you will say Na-na-na-na

That song is pathetic.

Side by side on my piano keyboard O Lord why can't we?

“ Read my body, are the letters big enough?

Read my body, do you like the book of my love?

Read my body, turn the page, get to the good stuff

Read my, read my body, yeah”

I am Music: and I write the songs.

You on the rise as you toucha my thighs

I go down dah dah down down down

I hold you in mah hand

Your smooth and shiny feels so good against my lips sugah!

I’m gonna miss you like a child misses its blanket

Roses really smell like poo poo

I don't like cities / But I like New York / Other places make me feel like a dork

B-A-N-A-N-A-S. This shit is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

I know you like to think your shit don’t stink. Lean in a little bit closer. Roses really smell like poo poo. Roses smell like poo poo 💩

I killed my former and Left her in the trunk on highway ten Put the knife under the hood If you find it, send it straight to Hollywood

"Yeah, you got that yummy-yum

that yummy-yum, that yummy-yummy."

I'm too sexy for my shirt

Too sexy for my shirt

So sexy it hurts

And I'm too sexy for Milan

Too sexy for Milan

New York, and Japan

And I'm too sexy for your party

Too sexy for your party

No way I'm disco dancing

I can hear her say

Leave me alone, won't you leave me alone

Please leave me alone, now leave me alone

Oh leave me alone, please leave me alone, yes leave me

Leave me alone, won't you leave me alone

Please leave me alone, now leave me alone

God leave me alone, just leave me alone, oh leave me

(Leave me!)

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will be as one

R32 really?

[quote] Begin the day with a friendly voice

A companion unobtrusive

Plays that song that's so elusive

And the magic music makes your morning mood

Off on your way, hit the open road

There is magic at your fingers

For the Spirit ever lingers

Undemanding contact in your happy solitude

Invisible airwaves crackle with life

Bright antenna bristle with the energy

Emotional feedback on timeless wavelength

Bearing a gift beyond price, almost free

All this machinery making modern music

Can still be open-hearted

Not so coldly charted, it's really just a question

Of your honesty, yeah, your honesty

One likes to believe in the freedom of music

But glittering prizes and endless compromises

Shatter the illusion of integrity, yeah

Invisible airwaves crackle with life

Bright antenna bristle with the energy

Emotional feedback on timeless wavelength

Bearing a gift beyond price, almost free

For the words of the profits were written on the studio wall

Concert hall

And echoes with the sound of salesmen.

Of salesmen

Of salesmen

Yeah. Real dumb. (surrre)

An honestly dumb lyric is also mentioned above and often misheard (same song) as revved up like a douche, another runner in the night..."

R64 for the 🏆

I like Outkast but I have to admit the "poo poo" lyric is stupid

Let's have some fun, this beat is sick I wanna take a ride on your disco stick

What the hell is a disco stick?

The reflex is a lonely child he's waiting by the park

The reflex is in charge of finding treasure in the dark

And watching over lucky clover isn't that bizarre

Every little thing the reflex does

Leaves you answered with a question mark

[quote]"Nobody does it better. Makes me feel sad for the rest. Nobody does it half as [bold]good[/bold] as you. Baby, you're the best."

Not Carly Simon's fault, as it was written by Marvin Hamlisch and Carole Bayer Sager. But Carly, couldn't you have sung "half as [bold]well[/bold] as you"? Surely you knew the difference.

Ooh, I've been to Nice and the Isle of Greece

When I sipped champagne on a yacht

I moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo

And showed them what I've got

I've been undressed by kings

And I've seen some things that a woman ain't s'posed to see

… ad nauseam

Okay r73 wins. Shut this thread down now!

Here I am, on a road again

There I am, up on the stage

Here I go, playing star again

There I go, turn the page

Most of the lyrics to Imagine.

You shook my tits and you rattled my cunt

Yummy,yummy,yummy I've got love in my tummy and I feel like-a lovin' you.

Poopy-di scoop

Scoop-diddy-whoop

Whoop-di-scoop-di-poop

Poop-di-scoopty

Scoopty-whoop

Whoopity-scoop, whoop-poop

Poop-diddy, whoop-scoop

Poop, poop

Scoop-diddy-whoop

Whoop-diddy-scoop

Whoop-diddy-scoop, poop

[quote]Lil' Kim not a whore. But I sex a nigga so good, he gotta tell his boys

Whatever it is, Nikki Sixx definitely wrote it.

R21 Only if you're trying to get a nasty vag infection! For shame

I swallow his babies

Abra abracadabra. I wanna reach out and grab ya

Stuck a feather in his cap and called it macaroni

R65 he rhymed 'one' with 'one'? 😂

[quote]♪ She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah ♫

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," you call that music?

"Hidy hidy ho," now that's music!

I got a little change in my pocket

Going dingaling aling

That one about "rain on your wedding day" being an example of irony. Only if you're the weatherman.

And they whirl and they twirl and they tango

Singin’ and jinglin’’ a jango

Floatin’ like the heavens above

Looks like muskrat love

I am, I said

To no one there

And no one heard at all

Not even the [bold]chair[/bold}

Neil, you had "care" right there for the taking. If you wanted to get fancy with two syllables, you had "despair." Did you knock off work early that day?

[/bold]

We be deep and we don't get no sleep

Cause we be up all night until the early night

You're havin' my baby

What a lovely way of sayin' how much you love me

The need inside you, I see it showin'

Whoa, the seed inside ya, baby, do you feel it growin'?

Are you happy you know it?

Daddy please don't, it wasn't his fault, he means so much to me

Daddy please don't, we're gonna get married

Just you wait and see.

“Thunder only happens when it’s raining.”

LIES!

Well, everybody rapping like it's a commercial

Actin' like life is a big commercial

So this is what I've got to say to you all

Be true to yourself and you will never fall

"Oops I did it again...I'm not that innocent...play with my cunt please"

“Fuckin magnets…how do they work?!?”

[quote]Little early birdie came by in his curlywurly and asked me if I needed a ride.

It's "Early Pearly," a derogatory nickname. The whole verse is about California losers who take themselves too seriously, a "silicone sister" and a manager, and the "go-kart Mozart" and his friend "Early Pearly," who are into cars just because it was trendy.

A curly wurly is a 1932 Ford Model 18, known as a Deuce Coupe, made famous by the Beach Boys and "American Graffiti."

That line at least makes sense; if you'd said "blow the bar but first remove the cookie jar" then I'd have agreed with you.

Anything by Gaga or Beyonce.

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark

All the sweet, green icing flowing down

I like to singy-singy-singy

Like a bird on a wingy-wingy-wingy

I like to rhumba-rhumba-rhumba

Dance to a samba-samba-samba-ah-ah-ah....

R71, what annoys me the most about that song is how he doesn't sing: "The reflex...", but "[italic]T'e[/italic] reflex..."

Sometimes the snow comes down in June (yes)

Sometimes the sun goes 'round the moon (what?)

Come on baby let's get away

Let me take you on an escapade

He asked me if I'd be his date for the prom

And he's buy me a horse, a Porsche and a farm

--"How Many Licks", Lil' Kim

Tryin’ to feel my hump hump. Lookin’ at my lump lump.

You can look but you can't touch it

If you touch it, Imma start some drama

You don't want no drama

No, no drama. No, no, no, no drama.

Mix your milk with my cocoa puff

Milky, milky cocoa

Mix you milk with my cocoa puff

Milky, milky right

How come every time you come around

My London, London bridge wanna go down

Like London, London, London

Wanna go down like London, London, London

" Land of the free and the home of the brave."

[R99] also:

R99 it gets better:

[quote] Niagara falls and the pyramids/Everything you believed in as kids/Fucking rainbows after it rains/There's enough miracles here to blow your brains/I fed a fish to a pelican at (Friscal?) bay/It tried to eat my cell phone, he ran away/Magic everywhere in this bitch (shit’s crazy)

R91. I am, I said

To no one there

And no one heard at all

Cuz no one was there

lovin you is easy cuz you're beautiful

*groan*

Upside down boy you turn mve inside out round and round

Diana Ross needs to stop.

SCREEEEEEEECH!!

"Shining like a supernova

Brightest of the stars

From another galaxy

Like Jupiter and Mars"

-- Supernova by Kylie Minogue

Jupiter and Mars are *not* from another galaxy. They aren't even from another solar system.

it's getting sour by the hour | hit me

Tough nut, don't crack | shake my tree and I'll attack

no cut, skin deep | secrets that you try to keep

Ooh, the flossy, flossy. The glamorous. The glamorous, glamorous. By the glamorous. Ooh, the flossy, flossy.

Dark skin, light skin, my Asian persuasion

I want a feed bag, feed bag...

Jeremy spoke in, spoke in

"Do you ever feel like a plastic bag drifting through the wind wanting to start again?"

R122 really?

Imo ‘Jeremy spoke in class today...’ is quite a subtle and beautiful way to understate the tragic story Pearl Jam wanted to relate. The whole song is quite an interesting and successful example of first person witness narration in popular rock.

The first verse of ‘Jeremy’ is chilling and brilliantly done, too—leading the listener to think of an innocent young boy drawing a triumphant bright beautiful landscape...until...

"A mulatto, an albino. A mosquito, my libido."

I'm going to miss you like a child misses their blanket.

r39

It's not because they are using the birds to symbolize how children grow up and leave.

Michael Jackson owns this thread

You give me Butterflies .......Eh hee hee

I'm a lover not a fighter

The girl is mine (yeah right)

"I wish you could swim, like the dolphins, like dolphins can swim". I love this song so much, but that line always makes me cringe. Sorry, David Bowie

R129 Simple Minds did it better.

I’m more a fan of The Wallflowers version.

I loved getting up in my grandma’s face singing Roses by Outkast.

2 from the same song:

"Tell your boyfriend if he says he's got beef that I'm a vegetarian and I ain't fuckin' scared of him."

"Shush girl. Shut your lips. Do the Helen Keller and talk with your hips."

R 124 Maybe it's just that I don't care for Peari Jam as well. Sounds like he's saying Jeremy's smokin'.

My baby takes the morning train

You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess

Dot, Dot, what a girl I got

When we shower together

We don't have to turn on hot

From the musical " New York Rock."New York Rock is an off-Broadway musical by avant-garde artist Yoko Ono. It is a fictionalized account of her marriage

to songwriter and Beatle John Lennon:

All day long, I felt like

Smashing my face in a clear glass window

But instead, I went out

And smashed up a phone box 'round the corner

Am I going crazy, or is it just you, daddy?

Am I going nuts, or is it just you, mommy?

Am I plain gone, or is it the world?

Mommy, I'd rather have you dead than crazy

R138 um that's incredible rage poetry from a goddess capturing the spirit of the female rasa how dare you!!!

R139 I agree. I love it

Loud or lewd or lah-dee-dah-dee

Everything to everybody!

Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy

Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy

Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy

Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy

Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy

Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy

Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy

R142 wins

This thread is reminding me how terrible Fergie's lyrics are!

Also, R125? I, uh, kinda like the way he sings those words.

[quote][R138] um that's incredible rage poetry from a goddess capturing the spirit of the female rasa how dare you!!!

And it articulates the feelings of the majority of New Yorkers.

I just fell Don't know why

Debbie Gibson, Lost in your eyes

R146 definitely cringe worthy

Elvira and Bobbie Sue by the oak ridge boys is pure cringe shit

I only want to die alive

Never by the hands of a broken heart

I don't wanna hear you lie tonight

Now that I've become who I really am

Ariana sings it like "Now that I've become who I really are"

'Aaaaaaaaaaaaand if you ask me how I'm feeling/Don't tell me you're too blind to see...'

"MacArthur Park"

I recall the yellow cotton dress Foaming like a wave On the ground around your knees The birds, like tender babies in your hands And the old men playing checkers by the trees

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark All the sweet, green icing flowing down Someone left the cake out in the rain I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it And I'll never have that recipe again Oh no!

"WAP"

If it don't hang, then he can't bang You can't hurt my feelings, but I like pain If he fuck me and ask, "Whose is it?" When I ride the dick, I'ma spell my name, ah

All of Electric Youth by Debbie Gibson

"About that drama, you don't want no problems

I love that llama but you know what it is

Aye, I get money, all I count is big money

Because all she get from me, boy, you know what it is"

Rapper T.I. including a llama in his song, because it rhymes

"I'm not an actor I'm not a star. And I don't even have my own car."

Can never listen to that line without squirming. Talk about stretching for a rhyme.

I'm a paperback writer

Boom, boom. boom

Let's go back to my room

We can do it all night

I can make you feel right

You make me wanna die. You make me wanna die. You make me wanna die

“You Make Me Wanna Die” by Farah

“I miss you like the deserts miss the rain.”

Do deserts really miss the rain? They’re not meant to get much rain. Does the rainforest miss the drought?

"I ate it up and spit it out."

Not dumb. Just disgusting.

“Oh babe, I wanna put my log in your fireplace.”

“Girl you make me feel real good, we can do it til we both wake up"

There were plants and birds and rocks and things

“She don’t eat meat but she sure likes to bone.”

Oh, for your information

Bertha had 3 sisters

Betty Butt, Bella Butt

And Bathsheba Butt

When Bertha butt did her boogie

She started the Bertha Butt Boogie

No question

Bum bum bumadaum

"If you wanna be ,my lover, you gotta get with my friends"

Hizzey gizzirls! Y’izzall hizzave to mizzove izzout the wizzay sizzzo the gizzuys can plizzay bizzasketbizzall

Izzsay whizzat? Nizzo yizzou izzain’t

y’izzall bizzetter mizzove

Izzsay whizzat? Willze illzain’t mill oven’

Shillzu gillza! Milzza nilzza bilzzaby!

Willze illzzare plizzayin’ dizzoouble dizzutch!

"Nibblin on bacon, chewin' on cheese...."

"Songs you sang to me, songs you BRANG to me...."

R135 Horrible dumbass song. People loved it, though.

Eh, sexy lady Oh-oh-oh-oh oppa Gangnam Style

Laughably bad...

“Why do I find it hard to write the last line?” Because you’re as smart as pig shit, of course!

How come pop/rock song writers suck compared to Broadway lyricists?

The former often produce wonky lyrics and straw-clutching rhymes, but Broadway show tunes for the most part are better written with clever rhymes, including internal.

R172 Just compare the volume of the two. Pop/rock is made on an industrial scale while Broadway tunes are handcrafted.

Would you like number twenty three? / Leave your yens on the counter please

"Hong Kong Garden" - Siouxsie And The Banshees.

I think you'll find Yen is the Japanese currency...

You insist you're not to be kissed

Cause your mama's not far away

I'm dismayed that you're so afraid

I'm beginning to waste away

I just wait while you contemplate

If your mama's outside the door

It's so wrong, we can't get along

'Cause you've never been stopped before

"What Your Mama Don't See (Your Mama Don't Know)" - Gary Glitter, hiding in plain sight.

Dehumanisation is such a big word

It's been around since Richard the Third

"Blind Youth" - The Human League

Raindrops are falling on my head [bold]And just like the guy whose feet are too big for his bed Nothing seems to fit[/bold] Those raindrops are falling on my head, they keep falling [bold]So I just did me some talking to the sun And I said I didn't like the way he got things done Sleeping on the job[/bold]

Can't complain, musn't grumble

Help yourself to another piece of apple crumble

"That Was Then, But This Is Now" - ABC

R178 quite a true indictment of British life.

"Yes," by Amber.

I put my arms around him, yes

And drew him down to me

So he could feel my breasts

And his heart was going like mad

And yes, I said yes, I will yes.

Respectfully I say to thee

R180 was Amber going for Kate Bush only missing the mark?

R182 God, that's as bad as Amber's song.

Some people call me Maurice cause I speak of the Pompatus of love

No lyric by Duran Duran ever made sense but they do rhyme,

"Hungry Like The Wolf"

Dark in the city, night is a wire Steam in the subway, earth is afire Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo

Woman, you want me, give me a sign And catch my breathing even closer behind Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo

In touch with the ground I'm on the hunt down, I'm after you Smell like I sound, I'm lost in a crowd And I'm hungry like the wolf

Straddle the line in discord and rhyme I'm on the hunt down, I'm after you Mouth is alive with juices like wine And I'm hungry like the wolf

"Lies and betrayals

Fruit-covered nails

Electricity and lust

Won't break the door

I've got a heavy coat

It's filled with rocks and sand

And if i lose it

I'll be coming back today"

-Pavement, "Trigger Cut"

Now my mascara running, red lipstick smudged

Oh, he so horny, yeah he want to fuck

He bucked all my buttons, he ripped my blouse

He Monica Lewinski'd all on my gown

R186 'Straddle the line in discord and rhyme/I'm on the hunt down, I'm after you/Mouth is alive with juices like wine' is not a bad line by the radio pop yardstick. It's even rather poetic.

'You Can Do Magic' is a lovely song, and musically I really enjoy it and admire it for the most part.

However, the 'you know *darn well*' in the chorus just jars my ear. It sounds so twee and so country, where the rest of the song is more psychedelic.

An AOR/anthemic 80s rock song dear to my heart, 'Burning Blue' by The Outfield, seems to make sense--if you don't listen too closely.

[quote] I don't wanna have to shout while the day is long/Repeating all the things that I've said and done/Only words you know so well.../And if I could explain what you want from me/Satisfy your insecurity/Something that you've failed to see...Oh my love for you - well it's still as new/And it's burning blue....

....what? 'Shout while the day is long'? 'It's still as new'....as what? And why is he able to explain what the subject wants from *him*, rather than vice versa?

Mmbop badubadop badooobop…

I know you really wanna taste wanna see my woohoo! Licky licky yum yum when he taste my woohoo!

Mmmmmm, mmmmm. mmmmm

Yeah, we fancy like Applebee's on a date night

Got that Bourbon Street steak with the Oreo shake

Get some whipped cream on the top too

Two straws, one check, girl, I got you

Bougie like Natty in the styrofoam

Squeak-squeakin' in the truck bed all the way home

Some Alabama-jamma, she my Dixieland delight (ayy)

That's how we do, how we do, fancy like, oh

R180 - to be fair, James Joyce wrote those words.

R194 he wasn’t dumb I bet he got a nice check from Applebee’s. Since that song hot number one their sales have been way up.

R194, good one

Don’t YOU wanna dance, say YOU wanna dance… Uh-huh With somebody who loves ME?!

(Other than that head scratcher, I love the song)

Jeannette, get your hair done...

"I feel good 'cause I don't feel bad"

A lyric from JLo's song "Emotions" on her AKA album

This is the actual third evrse of ":Love is All Around," the theme song to "The Mary Tyler Moore Show." They used the first verse (which begins "How will you make it on your own?") for the first season credits, and the second verse (beginning "Who can turn the world on with her smile?") for the credits for all seasons thereaftrt, but they never got around to using these lyrics for the third verse--yet these are the actual lyrics for the third verse of the song when it was first written:

"You are Most Likely to Succeed...

You've got the looks and charm,

And girl, you know that's all you need.

All the men around adore you!

That sexy look will do wonders for you..."

(And then the chorus: "Love is all around, no need to fake it

You can have the town, why don't you take it?

You're gonna make it after all...')

I am woman, watch me grow

See me standing toe-to-toe

As I spread my lovin' arms across the land...

But I'm still an embryo

With a long, long way to go

Until I make my brother understand!

R202 For a feminist anthem the embryo line has always bothered me after getting high and discussing lyrics with a friend in college. Most feminists tend to be pro-choice who view embryos as expendable, therefore if women are just embryos doesn't that mean they are expendable?

I’d rather jack than Fleetwood Mac

"I could have another man in a minute.

And in fact, he'll be here in a minute."

Here I am, in this city With a fistfull of dollars And you better believe I'm BACK *PSHEWWW* BACK IN THE NEW YORK GROOVE

Float, float on

Float on, float

Float, float, float on

Float on, float on

The Nirvana one is good and bad. But when I was studying psychology that song was big. I was studying for a test and a friend used that as an example of "clanging" and now I'll always remember it.

I always hated the rap in Kelis' "Bossy". It's not just dumb lyrics, he sounds so uninspired when he does it, and there's to bothering to even create a beat with the words:

[italic]It's 'bout time that she get with me

Can't stop starin', she's fine and she's pretty

Damn girl, don't hurt 'em

If niggas don't back back, you gon' work em

Put your mack down, I know your background

Whatchu want girl, you gettin' mad now

That's how you do it, huh?

Well I'm the coolest one

In fact, bitches in the back bring 'em to the front, bitch!

Tell that man you's a boss bitch

Make some noise, raise your hand if you's a boss bitch

I don't think he understand you's a boss bitch

Get some help if you can 'cause he lost it

Ain't no refunds, she spent the cash mayne

In your Benz with her friends in the fast lane

Flossin', you say "How much it cost me?"

About a million dollars playa, she's bossy

^*NO bothering, not "to".

¡Dame más gasolina!

"Look Away" by Chicago:

But if you see me walking by

And the tears are in my eyes

Look away, baby look away

And if we meet on the streets someday

And I don't know what to say

Look away, baby look away

Don't look at me

I don't want you to see me this way

If Terry Kath hadn't killed himself already, this would've driven him to suicide.

"Look Away" is a Diane Warren special.

From “Life” by Des’ree:

“I don't want to see a ghost / It's a sight that I fear most / I'd rather have a piece of toast”

Not as well known but this lyric from Del Amitri’s “Tell Her This” always makes me cringe. It’s a good song otherwise

Tell her something in my heart

Needs her more than even clowns need the laughter of the crowd

The second-worst lyric ever? From the same fucking song… “I bought a ticket *to* the world/But now I’ve come back again.”

OMG r214, is that real? HAHAHAHAHA!!

The first two lines were fine, but that third one took it for a loop.

Pa pa pa pa

Papa oom ma mow mow

Papa oom mow mow

Pa pa pa oom ma ma ma mow

Papa oom mow mow

Di di dit - papa oom ma mow mow

Papa oom mow mow

Di di dit - pa pa pa oom ma ma ma mow

Papa oom mow mow

Pomm

(pomm) - funniest sound I ever heard - (pomm)

Pomm

Pomm

(pomm) - I couldn't understand a single word - (pomm)

Pomm

Is he serious

Or is he playing

Oom mow mow is all he's saying

Papa oom - pomm

Pomm - papa papa papa oom

Pomm pomm

Di di dit - pa pa pa oom ma ma ma mow

Papa oom mow mow

Di di dit - pa pa oom ma mow mow

Papa oom mow mow

Pomm

(pomm) - I said a hey there partner what's your name - (pomm)

Pomm

Pomm

(pomm) - now don't you dare tell me the same old thing - (pomm)

Pomm

The words you sang, I can't figure out

But you've got a sound, make me stomp and shout

Papa oom - pomm

Pomm - papa papa papa oom

Pomm pomm

Di di dit - papa oom ma mow mow - dit dit

Papa oom mow mow

Di di dit - pa pa pa oom ma ma ma mow -dit dit

Papa oom mow mow

Di di dit - di di dit - di di dit

(pa pa pa pa)

Papa oom ma mow mow

Papa oom mow mow

Di di dit - pa pa pa oom ma ma ma mow

Papa oom mow mow

Pomm

(pomm) - and now I hear this sound everywhere I go - (pomm)

Pomm

(pomm) - on records, tv and a radio - (pomm)

Pomm

And now it's spreadin' all over the land

I still can't seem to understand

Papa oom

Papa papa papa oom

© Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group

I think this might win:

“Well slap my poosey.”

Bluffin' with my muffin'

Nobody cares about your muffin, rhinoceros face.

Standing on the corner watching all the girls go by,woo woo woo woo woo

Play that funky music, white boy! Play that.funky music,WHIIIITE!

Champagne Ivy is my name,

Champagne Ivy is my name,

Good for any game at night, my boys

Come and join me in a spree!

"Strong Enough" by Cher"

Come hell or waters high

You'll never see me cry.

R170 that was cringe. This version from Hawai'ian singer Loyal Garner is way better.

Had no idea it was a cover

This lyric in "I Haven't Stopped Dancing Yet" by Gonzalez has always bugged me:

"I haven't stopped dancing yet

Since we met on our first date

I haven't stopped loving you less

It's all right, it's all right, it's all right, it's all right."

Um, if he hasn't stopped loving her less, he must think she's a real cunt.

Take meeeeeeeee Take me to the wah-tahhhhhhhh Summertime summertime May-beeeeee We can fall in love Summertime summertime Time time summertime Summer summer summertime Time time summertime

[quote]It's so delicious (they wanna taste of what I got) I'm Fergalicious (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty). Fergalicious def-, fergalicious def-, fergalicious def- (Def-, def-, def-, def-, def-, def-, def-, def-, def-, def-) Fergalicious definition make them boys go crazy

I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese

I really think so

Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese

I really think so

I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese

I really think so

Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese

I really think so

To sir with love

R231 You realize "turning Japanese" is slang for jacking off, right?

I think that's an urban myth, R233. The song uses "turning Japanese" based on the stereotype of Japanese tourists taking photos of everything, the song is all about him taking photos.

She's having my baby

Got nobody to kiss tonight Nothin' to lose but my appetite!

Dumps like a truck in that Sisqo song.

na na na na na na na na na na na

I have YouTube just on autoplay this morning, letting random songs come through, and I thought of this thread, because some Carly Simon song just came through where she sang:

You pay the grocer

You fix the toaster

You kiss the host goodbye

Then you break a window

Burn the soufflé

Scream the lullaby

What a strange mix of everyday-ness and melodrama!

[quote]some Carly Simon song just came through

Turn in your gay card, r239

Hehe, not the first time I've had someone say that to me, R240. I have so much to learn!

...So while he was a-talking I was thinkin' up my plan Then my fingers did the walkin' On the telephone man Singin hey lolly, lolly Hey lolly, lolly Hey lolly, lolly Get it any way you can Right? Ha, ha, ha, so I got it in the bedroom And I got it in the hall And I got it in the bathroom And he hung it on the wall I got it with a buzz And I got it with a ring And when he told me What my number was I got a ding-a-ling A-singin hey lolly, lolly Hey lolly, lolly Hey lolly, lolly Just-a doin' my thing

Down in de cornfield Hear dat mournful sound: All de darkeys am a weeping -- Massa's in de cold, cold ground.

RIGHT, slaves crying over the death of their master.

Rrring my bell, el, el..,,Ring my Bell!

Suck my snatch and eat my ass.

"Then I remembered her strange perfume

And how I smelled it was in my own room..."

(from Cher's "Dark Lady", written by Snuff Garrett)

Huh? Even if they'd used the more correct "where" instead of "how" it's still a cringe-y, tortuous rhyme

Well, the Georgia patrol was a-makin' their round

So he fired a shot, just to flag 'em down,

And a big-bellied sheriff grabbed his gun

And said, "Why'd you do it?"

And the judge said "Guilty!" in a make-believe trial:

Slapped the sheriff on the back with a smile,

Said, "Supper's waiting at home

And I got to get to it!"

FIRST, BE A WOMAN, recorded by Leonore O'Malley, 1979

When you're walking down the street

Don't forget your sex appeal

Even though you're wearing jeans

It's important to be real

You were born to be yourself

So no matter how you feel

If you want to impress

Be the opposite sex

When he takes you for a ride

Let him open you the door

When he asks you for a dance

Let him lead you to the floor

When he kisses you good night

Let him come and beg for more

You can be all you can

Say "I am what I am"

But first, be a woman

First, be a woman

First be a woman

When he takes you out to dine

Don't go rushing to his bed

Give yourself a little time

Make him dream of you instead

And his passion will be like

All the stories that you've read

He can be Romeo

If you act like Juliet

Nowadays it ends too soon

Even though it's just begun

You can take him to the moon

He'll leave with the morning sun

Take a lesson from the past

Make him sweat and make him run

You can do all you can

Say "I am what I am"

But first, be a woman

First, be a woman

First, be a woman...

You can't be a quarterback

He can't wear a sexy dress

You cannot be Superman

And he's not a shy princess

So why try to be alike

When it's only self-defense?

You've got grace, he's got style

And together you'll rhyme

So remember to be true

To the legend that you are

All the feminine in you

Has worked miracles so far

So head up high and don't be shy

You can reach for any star

You can do all you can

Say "I am what I am"

But first, be a woman

First be a woman

First, be a woman

[quote] Well she's all you'd ever want, She's the kind they'd like to flaunt and take to dinner. Well she always knows her place. She's got style, she's got grace, She's a winner. She's a Lady. Whoa whoa whoa, She's a Lady. Talkin' about that little lady, And the lady is mine. Well she's never in the way Always something nice to say, Oh what a blessing. I can leave her on her own Knowing she's okay alone, and there's no messing. She's a lady. Whoa, whoa, whoa. She's a lady. Talkin' about that little lady, And the lady is mine.

R239 You are in the wrong thread. Those are very smart lyrics.

Jeramiah was a bullfrog

He was a good friend of mine

I never understood a single word he said

But I helped him drink his wine

R251 I remember watching the Donny and Marie show when I was a kid, and in one episode, when they got to the "I'm a Little Bit Country, and I'm a Little Bit Rock 'n Roll" musical segment, Donny sang this song, but changed the lyric to "But I helped him drink his milk."

My asshole is a mystery. It’s a mystery. My ass is a mystery to me. It’s a mystery. My asshole is a mystery to me.

R252 I remember seeing the Brady Bunch sing it as well, and instead of the line "and make sweet love to you", they sang "and let all the animals out of the zoo".

Got to write a classic/Got to write it in an attic/Babe I'm an addict now/An addict for your love

R25 you beat me to it!

I'm a janitor, oh my genitals I'm a janitor, oh my genitals Oh my genitals, I'm a janitor

T to the A, to the S T Y. Girl you tasty. T to the A to the S T Y. Girl you tasty.

Won't you take me to, funky town

I’m gonna swallow his babies yum yum

Sometimes when we touch, the honesty's too much.

R250, I disagree. But I am genuinely open to hearing why those lyrics are smart.

We built this city

Too shy too shy, hush hush I do I.

All I wanna do is boom boom boom

“…You, you've blown it all sky high

Our love had wings to fly

We could have touched the sky

You've blown it all sky high”

If I had wheels I’d be a wagon

Timothy aka An Ode to Cannibalism

Trapped in a mine that had caved in And everyone knows the only ones left Were Joe and me and Tim When they broke through to pull us free The only ones left to tell the tale Were Joe and me Timothy, Timothy, where on earth did you go? Timothy, Timothy, God why don't I know? Hungry as hell no food to eat And Joe said that he would sell his soul For just a piece of meat Water enough to drink for two And Joe said to me, "I'll have a swig And then there's some for you." Timothy, Timothy, Joe was looking at you Timothy, Timothy, God what did we do? I must have blacked out just around then 'Cause the very next thing that I could see Was the light of the day again My stomach was full as it could be And nobody ever got around To finding Timothy Timothy

It was "hush hush! Eye-to-eye!" Goddam-it!

Abra abracadabra/I wanna reach out and grab ya

It still makes me angry how stupid that is.

Chick-A-Boom, chick-a-boom, dontcha just love it...?

Baby I'm A Want You

The pompatus of love...Steve Miller's The Joker

Manama-Na do dooo dee do do

Contrary to popular belief, Steve Miller did not quite coin the nonsense phrase "the pompatus of love" in "The Joker".

It originally appeared in a doo-wop ballad, "The Letter" by The Medallions, 20 years earlier.

The original line was "let me whisper sweet words of pismotality, and discuss the puppeteuse of love". Nonsense words that somehow kind of worked within the context of the song.

Steve Miller, either by mis-hearing of mis-remembering the original made-up word "puppeteuse", turned it into "pompatus"...which I guess some people may think is dumb, but it's no dumber than "puppeteuse".

"Ebony and ivory

Live together in perfect harmony

Side by side on my piano keyboard, oh Lord

Why don't we?"

I remember when this was about to be released, I was excited that there was going to be a duet with Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder.

When I heard it, I couldn't believe my ears. I knew Paul could sometimes write some shitty, trite, embarrassing lyrics, but this seemed like a new low. And I couldn't fathom that Stevie allowed himself to get roped into this piece of shit.

To make things worse, it was one of the biggest hits, if not the biggest hit, of the year...although it's one of those songs the definitely has not aged well, and you really never hear it anymore.

Ying Yang Twins - Salt Shaker

Shawty crunk on the floor wide open

Skeet so much they call her Billy Ocean

It's dumb even though the song definitely has a groove. I can't help but smile when I hear Skeet (and not Ulrich)

Sometimes a tramp

Sometimes a dude

He changes colors just like a chameleon

Who can't find the mood

R277 When He Shines is a gorgeous song.

Get your tongue outta there before I get my hand on your balls.

I’m still a woman to me.

Just call me angel of the morning, angel.

Dark Child Na Na

R278...with some of the most ridiculous lyrics.

^^Says you. Go jump in the toilet.

R284 "Sometimes a dude?" Really? :-)

I've never been to me

You're having MY baby.

What a lovely way of telling me how much you love ME.

R287 When I was growing up, my mom HATED that song. I remember riding in the car with her one day and the song came on the radio. My mom yelled at the radio, "How nice of her to have a baby for YOU!"

In Niall Horan's Slow Hands, which has a good melody but terrible lyrics

"Slow, slow hands Like sweat drippin' down our dirty laundry"

My ding-a-ling

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard

And they're like, it's better than yours

Damn right it's better than yours

I can teach you, but I have to charge

Lord love a duck, Pharrell is one of the co-writers on this song!

Grandma got ran over by a reindeer.

^run

"Catfish makes my nature rise" is a line from the song "Catfish" by The Four Tops. As a kid, I had no idea what these lyrics meant.

Whatcha gon' do with all that junk

All that junk inside your trunk?

I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk

Get you love drunk off my hump

My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump

My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps

Run, Joey, run, Joey, run.

"Strong Enough," by Cher

"Come hell or waters high

You'll never see me cry."

"Come spend the night inside my sugar walls."

My lovely lady dumps

"Da do run run run da do run run."

Hot patootie bless my soul, I really love that rock & roll.

How is that dumb r298?

Man, I feel like a woman.

It’s Britney bitch

I'm blue

Da ba dee da ba di

Da ba dee da ba di

Da ba dee da ba di

Da ba dee da ba di

Da ba dee da ba di

Da ba dee da ba di

Da ba dee da ba di

People think that I'm insane

The only gun is in my brain

Each new birth it gives me hope

That's why I don't smoke that dope

Insane people think I am

Brain inside, my only friend

Hope it gives me birth each new

That dope I don't smoke, it's true

Toot toot ah beep beep

Don’t want no short dick man.

R277 LOL! When I was in college, my gay friends and I used to make fun of this song. If it came on the radio, somebody would say, "Quiet! It's 'Sometimes a Dude!'" We wouldn't even call the song by its real name, "When He Shines."

Then we'd all go into falsetto when it got to the part where she sings "chameleon" really fast and mimic Sheena.

God, were we gay or what?

In your satin tights fighting for our rights.

What makes me giggle about that song, R311, is that I can't work out if they're saying:

"Get us out from under, Wonder Woman!" or

"Get us out from under Wonder Woman!"

Punctuation matters so much, haha. Thinking of it being the second really tickles me.

99 Luftballons

I'm romancing the stone, never leaving your poor heart alone

Every night and every day gonna love the hurtin' away

Destiny's Child - Survivor:

I'm not gon' lie on you and your family

I'm not gon' hate on you in the magazines

I'm not gon' compromise my Christianity

You know I'm not gon' diss you on the internet

'Cause my mama taught me better than that

Because I fondly recall the days when my mama would sit me down and say, "Don't go dissin' people on the internet."

God, those lyrics to "Survivor" are so dumb, R315. Years ago my friends and I would get together to play SingStar, that karaoke game on the PS2, and "Survivor" was one of the songs. It was impossible for us to get through it without breaking out into laughter at the lyrics.

One of the standouts was: "If I surround myself with positive things, I'll gain prosperityyyyyyy!" Couldn't stop laughing at how clunky that line was.

For R275 =

More evidence R315 =

It’s hard to move a muscle when you’re frozen in your bed.

My humps they got you.

R180, did Amber lift that from the end of James Joyce’s Ulysses?

I found my thrill on Blueberry Hill.

The lyrics today= If you saw my ass it'd be a hard pass.

.

My lip gloss be poppin

There's some whores in this house

There's some whores in this house

There's some whores in this house

There's some whores in this house

There's some whores in this house

There's some whores in this house

I eat cannibals / It's incredible

R325 Stupid lyrics, but I still love the song!

A goddess on a mountain top Was burning like a silver flame The summit of beauty and love And Venus was her name She's got it Yeah, baby, she's got it Well, I'm your Venus I'm your fire, at your desire Well, I'm your Venus I'm your fire, at your desire

Then dripped the blood from the cross

It told me the King is my boss.

There's a girl that's been on my mind All the time, Sus-Sussudio, oh-oh Now she don't even know my name But I think she likes me just the same, Sus-Sussudio, whoa-oh Ah, if she called me, I'd be there I'd come running anywhere She's all I need, all my life I feel so good if I just say the word, Sus-Sussudio Just say the word, oh, Sus-Sussudio Now I know that I'm too young My love has just begun, Sus-Sussudio, oh-oh Ooh, give me a chance, give me a sign I'll show her anytime, Sus-Sus-Sussudio, oh-oh

My pussy stinks

It really do

My boyfriend thinks

It smells like poo

You get no cock

When the seagulls flock

'Pop pop went the weasels in my mind.'

('Special Lady')

Baking soda, I got baking soda!!!

Baking soda, I got baking soda!!!

Whip it through the glass, nigga!!!

I'm blowin' money fast, nigga!!!

I'm in love with the CoCo

I'm in love with the CoCo

I got it for the low low

I'm in love with the CoCo

("CoCo" by OT Genasis)

Beep beep who’s got the keys to the Jeep? Vrrrrrrr

Orange Mussolini: Say MAGAs, what time is it?

MAGAs: It'Miss Lindzebelle Time!

It's Miss Lindzebelle Time.

It's Miss Lindzebelle Time.

Donnie and Lindzey too

Say Lindzebelle to you.

Let's give a rousing cheer,

Cause Miss Lindzebelle’s here,

It's time to start the show,

So MAGAs let's go!

Get outta my dreams

And into my car

Oh my God Becky, look at her butt It is so big, she looks like One of those rap guys' girlfriends But, ya know, who understands those rap guys? They only talk to her, because She looks like a total prostitute, okay? I mean, her butt, it's just so big Uh, I can't believe it's just so round, it's like out there I mean, uh, gross, look She's just so, black

Grandma used to criticize the way i pulled out my tampon. It made me so depressed. Then I realized she didn’t use one. Oh, she was one stupid old bitch.

Grandma got run over by a reindeer

R337 That juvenile, unfunny, poorly written fake lyric wasn't worthy of being added to one thread.

So, of course, you add it to two.

R339 your review was was much appreciated.. have a blessed day.

The Chainsmokers' "Closer." Every time I hear that piece of shit song, I wanna stab my eardrums.

It's like they went to a first grade class and said, "Hey, kids! Write down every word you can think of that ends in 'er,' then took all those words and tried to make a song out of 'em.

So, baby, pull me closer

In the back seat of your Rover

That I know you can't afford

Bite that tattoo on your shoulder

Pull the sheets right off the corner

Of that mattress that you stole

From your roommate back in Boulder

We ain't ever getting older

Boom boom pow

Shaggy remaking Angel of the Morning (original walk of shame anthem). So instead of 'Just call me angel of the morning baby, just touch my cheek before you leave me baby' Is replaced by Shorty you're my angel, my darling angel, closer than my peeps you are to me, baby'

There's also the poetic You were there through my incarceration, I wanna show the nay-shun my ha-pre-ce-A-shun

Really quite funny, and the heavy Jamaican accent helps!

Africa slaps, but I can’t even read these lines with a straight face:

[quote] The wild dogs cry out in the night/ As they grow restless, longing for some solitary company/ I know that I must do what's right/ As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti

R344 I always thought they lyric was "rises like an empress above the Serengeti."

[quote] Heading for the nineties, living in the eighties/ Screaming in a back room, waiting for the big boom/ Give me, give me wild west, give me, give me safe sex/ Give me love, give me love, give me time to live it up

So bad it didn’t even chart in the UK.

See, that would kind of make sense, r345. Even if you can’t see Kilimanjaro from the Serengeti.

R346 I'm only admitting this bc this is an anonymous board, but I actually love that stupid song. Anytime someone's hand out Valium in a back room I'm in...

Go enjoy your safe sex, you responsible citizen!

Coo-coo-ca-choo, Mrs. Robinson

You turn me on like a lightswitch

That is deep allegory. A mastery of similes and allusion.

"I can't feel my face when I'm with you."

Why? Did you just come from the dentist's office?

Lindsey, Lindsey, Lindsey…….

Absolute elsewhere in the stones of your mind--

J. Lennon

I ain't wanna give you a baby just yet, so I backed out and nutted on your breasts (Mood Swings, Pop Smoke)

I didn't even know about this song until I read about it here a couple of days ago. But the "Return to Harper Valley PTA" has some fucked up Christian lyrics that ruin the song.

They were drinking beer and popping pills

And acting like they were all having fun

I got so mad

I thought at first I'd go back to the house and get a gun [???]

Then I went back to my home

And took my Bible out

And said a little prayer

Now, tomorrow, I can tell 'em that

God loves 'em and I tell 'em that I care [after thinking about murdering them]

I find myself cringing every time I hear Wang Chung's "Dance Hall Days".

Get fresh for the weeekend

I’m showing out.

It’s: get fresh AT the weekend, showing out

[quote]I am, I said

[quote]To no one there

[quote]And no one heard at all

[quote]Cuz no one was there

It's even dumber when he changes that last verse to "Not even the chair."

Revved up like a deuce (or wrapped up like a douche, as many people hear it). Neither version makes any sense.

"Your sex is on fire..." by Kings of Leon.

Just makes me think of somebody having a venereal disease.

Not the worst but

[quote] … Why are you looking down all the wrong roads?/ When mine is the heart and the salt of the soul

Is all kinds of mixed metaphors in a blender Adele is even worse at this than Sam Smith.

Fergie is all over this thread. Are her lyrics the dumbest of all?

No, because she’s Fergalicious

“She was doin’ da butt!”

Wait, I thought you said smartest lyric…

Not a dumb lyric, but I just recently realized that the Rick James song "Mary Jane" is about weed and not a female, and I was around when this song first came out. The first line is "I'm in love with Mary Jane, she's my main thing....". I feel so stupid!