Jack Grealish, part 18 - you're my Wonderwall...

Previous thread, you know how this goes..

Jack found some standard-issue length shorts for the first game-day! How sweet, very respectful of the occasion, and not hogging the spotlight.

Of course, we won't see him wear them that long again until next year's season opener. Cursory compliance is one thing, but if Jack doesn't have all eyes on his arse as often as possible, he'll simply cease to exist. This matter goes beyond mere modesty.

We reckon de Bruyne & Haaland have double-teamed yet, or nah?

ok so sorry to Jack and to feminism and not to slut-shame but

honestly Trent pushing Jack off the pitch during the Community Shield match was the proudest moment of my life as an LFC fan motherhen

i was like that's my one good son!!!! putting a cheap sellout yachtgirl in check!!!!! that's one point for integrity!!!!!

Damn, OP's gif is a thing of beauty.

R5 Jack is so incredibly gorgeous.

And brainless. And shallow. And pilled-out. And rode hard. And only good for one thing.

But yes, we have to give him gorgeous.

Jack’s now being touted as the next big guest panellist on comedy sports gameshow A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN, and is apparently keen to appear because he wants to prove he’s more intelligent and quick than everyone assumes.

Oh...baby...no. The programme hired Jamie Redknapp for the same reasons, and we all know how that turned out, don’t we. Those bitchy rude comedians want you only as the token Barbie to take easy potshots at...

England lionesses Skipper Leah Williamson also has a Gucci sponsor deal.

Wonder if she’ll collab with Jack? She’s the hotter commodity and the more successful of the two, at least for now.

It's only been a few matches, and Pep's already fed up of Jack's on-pitch chokes & shenanigans.

Maybe Jack's conditioned to keep backpassing and bottling it, because like a typical nympho he prioritises the boys rather than the game? Wants to make the squad happy and give them the lions' share of the ball, so that the lads will feel grateful enough to fuck him senseless later.

So relieved that the 'fall over and automatically get into doggy like a desperate gaping whore' pose hasn't been retired yet. We highly rate that one.

It's so effective, that it renders players wanting to take Jack on temporarily immobile. Hendo wouldn't run at him for a few minutes after Jack did it, head completely gone after seeing Jack down on the ground laid out in the way he loves most.

Erling is so much bigger than Jack, hadn't noticed that until the West Ham game.

Must be lovely for our slut, feeling so delicate and helpless in the arms of a strapping fella who can pin him down and really go to town. That's Jack's fetish in a man, really, if you think about it--there's been Petrovic, Terry, McGinn, Mings, Hendo, de Bruyne...

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

R5 there’s a bit more where that came from..

R11, Jack is really striking a sultry classic Hollywood leading lady pose in that embrace shot with Haaland.

r7 is there anything that Romesh Ranganathen is not in? The ubiquitous go to ethnic.

R14 yes!!!! Jack living his glamour-girl femme-fatale fantasy!!!

Kind of ruined the sexy smoulder that he wasn't quick enough to hide the instinctive blissed-out look on his face when Haaland first grabbed him, though..

Hilarious that he kicked West Ham's Jarrod Bowen over, just so he could pretend Jarrod went for him first and get sympathy from the bigger lads. Lying slag!

Bet England's future captain Declan Rice wasn't happy with his mate Jack about that naughty devious behaviour. Can't just go round sticking cleats into other fellas' boyfriends, can you, just because you want a bit of attention and fuss over you.

R16, that shot of Jack surprisingly shows he's capable of being a bit of cool, if smoldering, Hitchcock blonde. Reminiscent of Kim Novak as Madeline in Vertigo.

Let's try link again. Hope this works

I ❤️ love Jack.

It would seem the former Villa Captains in Jack & Tyrone have come together to support their successor John McGinn in stepping up to take the Villa armband.

Wonder if there’s a sexual initiation as part of that? Jack certainly wouldn’t be opposed, and Tyrone’s not fucked him in a long time..

Awww the way the EA graphics people made Jack look exact the right level of adorably and fuckably and sluttishly pathetic in FIFA...

He just sits there and nods with his brainless pretty mouth wide open doing what all the older men around him tell him to. The accuracy!

Sometimes it's hard not to wonder how much easier life would be, having Jack's looks and lack of self-consciousness.

R15 ymmv but imo Romesh is not even funny or a very good host. He just seems like a bitter, passive-aggressive nerd at whom people laugh nervously and politely so he doesn’t snap on them.

Now sexy Freddie Flintoff and quick Himmy Carr have left ALOTO, there’s no reason to watch.

Good thing Jack didn't start today because he would have demanded Kevin De Bruyne shag him on the pitch after that goal by de Bruyne.

Jack now on for start of second half in place of Foden. Will he be focussed in order to get rewarded after the match by Haaland and/or Kevin and/or anyone/everyone else on the team?

OT but Haaland's lotus-pose goal celebration gives me the absolute ick. So tryhard.

I'm sure Jack's not remotely put off, though. Just another big man's lap he can sit on and grind like a needy purring slut.

Oh no, looks as if our favourite Whore has been injured!

Who was the brute that targeted those delicate beautiful glass ankles? Shit-list for them.

Daresay Haaland didn't seem very concerned or impressed by Jack going to ground--maybe not good 2nd boyfriend material. KDB looked worried, at least.

R28, he managed to shake it off and play the rest of the game. At least Kevin seems to care, he's a good egg that one, and a tremendously talented player. That goal he scored yesterday was a work of art.

R29 you’re not wrong about Big Kev. That was a stunning finish yesterday.

Idk about you lot, but I reckon a goal that good deserves a kinky prize. Something fun and different and spicy, to keep Kevin motivated all season and on the successful road he’s on. When you find momentum in sport or in any passion pursuit, it pays to maintain it, after all. And Jack’s all about passion, team-spirit, getting the win and making the lads happy!💙💙💙

Hmm, possibilities. Jack could beg for Kevin’s tongue to open him up, saying absolute filth but with his eyes all big and butter-wouldn’t-melt in that tempting way he does. Or could tie Kevin’s shirt around those baby browns, sink helplessly down and let Kevin do whatever he feels in the moment. Jack could roleplay that he’s a young bubbly over-eager non-player fan, or a starstruck ball-boy, get deeper into an idol fantasy. Or perhaps Jack’s got it in mind to be more of a girl, a tight pussy for his hero, digging out a skimpy and pretty City-blue summer dress that Kevin can tear off.

Pep’s got a stockade for the dressing-room stashed away somewhere too, I’m sure. But that’s for more public and group-oriented rewards & punishments.

Jack is cute, but do not get carried away, he has them flaring nostrils, a feminine face and that bad hairdo. He has a great ass, that's it!

R31 Jack's a star. SO pretty and with all that long hair perfect to pull on. Don't be jealous!

[quote] Good thing Jack didn't start today because he would have demanded Kevin De Bruyne shag him on the pitch after that goal by de Bruyne.

Feel like Jack's constantly pestering KDB for sexual relief when they're at training or away for games. Just sliding up to Kevin in the hotel corridors or in the Empt!had showers, and asking for a taste or a feel of that fat Belgian cock to tide him over until Jack can get home and see Daddy or sext someone else. Because Jack can't really troll for new dick while he's at work, and fucking Walker/Stones/Foden in rotation gets boring after a while (Little Phil is tiny and more of a bottom too, Kyle finishes too quick and tires too easily, and Stones is always talking about non-sexy things like how he feels guilty about cheating on Pickford).

Little slag likes to try and be adorable, hiding and jump-scaring people around the workplace, then running off giggling.

Ruben Dias keeps falling for it. Guess he wants another turn with and inside that gorgeous body, so he humours Jack's silly childish pranks and hopes Jack likes him better for it. No-one's told poor Ruben yet that he doesn't have to, that he can treat Jack exactly how he likes and Jack will still let him hit whatever he wants whenever, so long as it's on City time and not at home (Hendo's tolerant, but he's not *that* tolerant).

City's #7 João Cancelo seems to have the thankless unofficial job of protecting the Slut Princess whenever a fight pops off (usually Jack's doing).

The most recent incident happened just the other day, in the game vs. Bournemouth. Jack caught the eyes of Bournemouth's Adam Smith one too many times, passions were stirred, wires got a bit crossed, and before you know it Jack was on his feet ready to dive over there and latch onto his confused and angry opponent's cock. Jack's lust and heats are going to get a man brutally attacked on the pitch, one of these days.

Is Jack jealous of all the hot throbbing vascular footballer dick that England teammate Raz is getting at Chelsea?

That sluttish natural back arch Raz has going on could rival Jack’s...

Awww, lovely to see Jack is still close with big sexy Tyrone Mings.

In response to critical comments made this week by bitter old pundit Graeme Souness writing for the Daily Fail, Tyrone snapped back on social media, and Jack backed him up. What a faithful friend (and hole).

Doubt Hendo was happy about Souness’ rude unnecessary comments, either. Tyrone is a good mate of Jordan’s as well as Jack’s, when they all play for England. Perhaps Hendo can send Jack over to Tyrone’s place for a bit of cheering up, or they can even go together to visit Ty in the Midland and get a defiant threeway distraction going.

Dirtsheets are a-rumble, saying that Jack is edging himself out of the City XI with every appearance he ghosts or bottles.

Good, City don't know how to treat their concubines, anyway. We'll find a service sub role for you at Anfield, baby, don't you worry.

There’s an up-and-coming racehorse named after him, a pretty 5-year old chestnut gelding called Super Superjack. Bred in Ireland, of course.

The horse has only been racing for a few years, but has won at Bath several times, and placed well at Ascot & Goodwood.

Super Superjack is owned by Lee Turland and trained by Milton Harris, the latter of whom says of the his young charge:

[quote] “He can be a little quirky at the finish, but he's progressive..his course form is a plus.”

For R20 & R31, because our favourite pretty arse has been too quiet this past week—behaving himself, even...

The City boys play Newcastle United on Sunday. Jack still owes forward player Miguel Almiron an apology for making fun of him at the end of last season—perhaps letting Miggy skullfuck him in the dressing-room while Newcastle’s XI watch and wank onto the ‘10’ on the back of Jack’s ugly City shirt will be sufficient redress...

Love the needy way he always looks on the bench, surveying the opposition and the crowd for anyone who looks up for fucking him.

His social media has been quiet this week. Must be busy training and shagging. Or shagging and training.

Erling Haaland is kind of ugly and kind of Nazi Aryan beautiful at the same time.

R44 Jack doesn't care what Erling looks like, only how he gives dick.

Not me pretending to my upper middleclass rugby-fan sociopathic Tory relatives--over the newspaper crossword brandished during weekend get-together brunch--that I know nothing about Premier League football, couldn't name a City player at gunpoint, and haven't the first idea who Haaland is. (his first name was the answer to a clue)...

Think I got away with it. None of them could guess I use spare time to write filthy smut about EPL footballers, and essentially RP Jack Grealish online.

Eddie Howe: right then lads you need to wait until *after* the match to gangbang an apology out of Grealish. if Pep’s feeling generous he might let us borrow Jack as a pre-game fluffer but he’s got his own team to manage first in that respect

Jack's not even on the squad today let alone starting. Either his ankle injury he suffered last match is worse than it appeared at the time, or they are keeping him away from Newcastle, or he's worn out from too much shagging during the week so not fit to play 90 + on the pitch.

[quote] they are keeping him away from Newcastle, or he's worn out from too much shagging during the week so not fit to play

R48 bit of both ain’t it?

For City to have their winger set upon, stripped, fingered and fucked into a soaked drooling daze, for a stadium quarter-full of fans and cameras to see, would not be best for business, as much as Jack would love it and probably benefit.

Then there’s the daily railing sessions he’s been having to curb his generalised anxiety. The physios at MCFC do wonders for spinal alignment and muscle stretches, yenno..

A DRAW????

All that money and time and expertise Pep has at his fingertips but he can't put together an XI sound enough to slaughter a bang-average Newcastle???

Any City fans here I hope feel a deep abiding embarrassment, because the slut on your roster is incapable of course, while the other players clearly don't care.

Given Hendo’s history with injuries, I’m assuming and trusting that he knows how best to work carefully and gently with Jack’s lateral ankle sprain/LCL knee during sex.

Goes without saying that Jack feels better after almost anything Jordan does, though.

why was giggly Jack watching Newcastle from the crowd so funny💀💀💀

cheeky minx dngaf about football he’s just there to vibe and sometimes get railed