Can a man still be masculine if he has a fem/obvious voice?

Of course not.

Yes!

I think masculinity is all about effortless confidence. A man can very butch and wear the most backwards baseball cap in the world but if he frets about his masculinity then he's not masculine, imo. The reverse is true too.

Of courth! Don’t be thilly!

Nope!

R4, which Josh Lucas?

Ask Lindsey Graham

Nope

Not if he has hit butt in the air

N O

R3 Many femme gays are very confident but that doesn't make them masculine.

Yes, very well

Interesting question

Surprised there are not more responses

Maybe

Why do you ask?

Tattoos and a girly voice are the very two things that make David Beckham so unappealing.

Possible, but is there a single example? William F. Buckley?

Fuck no.

They can try! 🤣

The GAY accent is the MAIN thing that prevents a gay guy from being masculine.

R21, I totally agree!

Yes.

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Beck

Does he have a masculine body?

No, the voice can ruin everything.

So can the body

How can a man look masculine but when he opens his mouth dicks fall out. There is a contradiction of perception.

I don't have a feminine "accent", but I've had surgery on my vocal cords five times since I was 7, and it's left me with a higher than "guy" voice, I sound like I'm hitting puberty, and I get called Mrs. on the phone a lot., which is not good for the self-esteem.

Bump

Yesser

No. He cannot.

I knew a guy at work once, I would call him a Muscle Queen....like Bodybuilder huge...HUGE. And he had the most absolute femme girly voice...like it sounded like he had swallowed helium every time he spoke. Bottom line , no.

R30 is this guy

Or nasally with a slight lisp. Turn off.

How dare you, Sir!

You are not fit to be received in the homes of Good Christian heterosexualist!

And I for one would not sit in my parlour with my ankles discreetly crossed - as one does when entertaining callers - with a vulgarian like you!

OP, may I introduce you to my wife Demi-Leigh Tebow.

And before you ask, "Yes, I did design her dress and I even stitched it up on my Singer - Demi-Leigh has a few figure flaws that are hard to disguise with 'off-the rack' frocks...and I just do so enjoy making women more beautiful."

"Why yes, I chose all her accessories myself too - you are too kind, Sir!"

Chris Steele

R41, who is Chris Steele?

Rock Hudson is a good example of that.

"Can a man still be masculine if he has a fem/obvious voice?"

I find the word "obvious" interesting in this context.

You know what's sad? Although I think I generally sound "gay as blazes" in a Harvey Fierstein kind of way, when I have a cold I sound like Darth Vader minus the scuba noises.

So I went to the store one day with a cold (pre-pandemic) and the cashier who had definite gay voice, asked me if I wanted paper or plastic.

I answered in my Darth Vader voice.

Suddenly he lowers his voice and seems to get very defensive as if my voice was some sort of rebuke.

That's internalized homophobia. Kind of like this entire thread, which was probably started by this creep:

I have a very medium voice. Not high, not low. But my voice is almost identical to my mom’s. I get ma’am on the phone all the time, she got sir.

But I have a strange attraction to big muscle-bound Mary’s with the gayest voices. If they’re real, and not an affectation, the girly expressive voice and excessive use of gay slang coming out of a big he-man’s mouth is something I find adorable.

"no this is dan!"

Dunno

Bump

Yes.

Probably

.....

Dunno

If he "Looks Like Tarzan and Sounds Like Jane," No. Despite all the kids Bobby Kennedy created, he sounded like a Nelly Queen.

Only if he is willing to slap a ho for you.

Chris Steele has a really low voice, doesn't he? If not, then he's an example of a guy who can still be masculine without one.

Yes.

[quote]Chris Steele has a really low voice, doesn't he? If not, then he's an example of a guy who can still be masculine without one.

Like many gay porn stars, he has a fake-masc voice that he uses on camera but is full sausage-curls nelly IRL.

No, voice is critical

No. I don't think so.

I don't think so but then to me the American accent often sounds gay anyway.

[...]

[...]

Oh yeah

There is nothing sexier than a man with deep rich voice. I am straight woman so I like my men to sound like a real man.

Colton Haynes

I don’t give a flying fuck- what is wrong with some of you- your question OP is loaded with homophobic subtext.

Can he fix stuff, throw a mean fuck, and need to be the outside spoon?

Honestly vocal fry , which is practised plenty by straight men is 1000 times more annoying than "gay speak". Also, as an actual straight woman, R65 seems to be a troll more than anything, so pay it no matter.

R69 even more annoying than vocal fry is upspeak. Especially if spoken by a man, gay or straight

Agree R70

I find gay voice so unappealing and unattractive. To answer OP’s question, no. A man who has an effeminate voice cannot be and is not masculine.

Gay voice is like nails on chalkboard and any guy I’m attracted to based on looks who turns out to have gay voice is no longer hot to me.

It is especially jarring because I tend to avoid gay bars/gay spaces, so in the rare instance I hear a group of effeminate gays talking in public, it just sounds so over-the-top. I mean do you really have to broadcast your sexuality in such an obvious and obnoxious way?

I don’t think many gay men with gay voice are even aware of how they sound. Gay voice is learned behavior, that many gay guys emulate from other gay guys. It’s not natural and it’s not attractive, and most people won’t say anything, but I know it makes many people uncomfortable (especially most straight men).

I know I’ll be roasted for my comments but I don’t care.

R72 it's not learned -- maybe flamboyant speak is, but not your common or garden effeminate voice.

R72- Like that ANNOYING character Elijah on GIRLS- he was super QUEENY and super BITCHY

It is learned, R73.

It’s one thing to have a slightly effeminate voice, but the flamboyant, attention-seeking way many gay effeminate American men speak is unique to them, and the accent seems to have really taken hold over the past 25 years from what I gather.

R75 I agree with you. I guess it just depends on how you define 'slightly effeminate' vs 'flamboyant', although I think we all know that the latter means.

Is Richard Simmons merely effeminate or is he a SCREAMING QUEEN?

Also one thing about gay voice that I seldom hear discussed is the negative implications it has for employment or job prospects.

Certainly this is changing, and many companies (especially tech) firms will hire an effeminate, obviously gay men for client-facing facing, or executive-level roles, but many companies, especially in conservative parts of the country, will not.

Simmons is a queen.

But I think many gay guys are also very queeny. If a random stranger hears you speak and can deduce your sexual orientation (gay) within two seconds, you’re a queen. Many, many gay men are obvious to random strangers.

The more reserved gay men, who have some effeminate qualities, but aren’t so flaming, but still may be identified as gay after some interaction are a different species from the queens.

And then you have other gay men who aren’t at all obvious, although they seem to be much more rare.

You answered your own question. He can certainly LOOK masculine, but overall masculinity will dissipate once he starts talking.

R79 where do I fit in your schema of things, R79?

R61, the AMERICAN accent sounds gay? Uhhh, as opposed to what? A British accent? Lmao. Literally the first time I have ever heard this…

There's a guy I'm in lust with who is gorgeous/manly, but has a high, nasally fem voice and he talks fast, too. Just an awful voice. And he likes to talk a lot.

It's what brings him down to an 8. It's that bad that I have to take off two points.

All language, pronunciation, accent, etc. is all learned.

Do babies come out of the womb talking?

No?

It's all learned.

I'm the one who told the story about the grocery store clerk altering his voice after hearing me with a cold.

I dated a guy once who was very well-built/roided up, he had Greek heritage so was dark/swarthy looking and basically just looked like he could fuck you up - but he was pretty soft spoken, I wouldn't say feminine as such but definitely not the deep, gruff voice that you might expect from looking at him. I don't think it made him any less masculine, it's about the whole package and how someone holds themselves, one aspect that isn't 'stereotypically masc' doesn't bring down the whole impression IMO.

I remember getting to know a guy online, he was really hot, with a rugged, masculine, “tough” kinda look. When we eventually met in person the moment he opened his mouth it killed the attraction for me: imagine this high pitched, ultra queeny “Oooohhhh myyyy GOOOoooooodddDdd!! HhHHHIIIIIYYYAAAAAAA!!!”

That’s why I talk to dudes on phones for a while before meeting

.....

You can look like the biggest, strong, lean man but if you open your mouth and your purse drops out, you're gay. Your masculinity score just dropped from 9 to 3.

You know, I have been wondering about this for a while with regard to the news media. You can be gay, but not sound gay until recently. First time I saw Philip Rucker on MSNBC I had to do a double take. He sounds really gay but he knows his shit. At first I thought oh, he wont last, people will make fun of him but to his credit or their credit, he's on there all the time with no problems. I mean granted he still tries to speak professionally so no Yass Queen or other gay slang. I think Vaughn Hillyard also sounds gay. But he's more of a reporter on the street.

Sure

Voice is important, but so is what you talk about. You can have a masculine voice, but the content of your conversation is effeminate, or stereotypically gay, people will view you as effeminate

R90, you think it's a detriment for Phil to have that voice? If anything, I'm sure it opens more doors to sources with all of those closet case Republicans in DC.

He was also a figure skater as a kid.

What about st8 men with gay voice like john ritter and ryan Reynolds?

R94- Ryan Reynolds is as straight as Richard Simmons.

I always thought that John Ritter had a quite effeminate voice. I'm not sure about him but I do find it hard to believe he was totally heterosexual.

Bump

Sumer

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Never

Sometimes

Never

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Butt

.....

Looks Like Tarzan. Sounds Like Jane.

R105- The proper phrase is

See Tarzan Hear Jane

Naw

Yesser

R2 yenno the footballer who came to mind first for me was John Terry. More of a masc demeanour & body but softer voice and mannerisms than DIE-vid.

other side of the spectrum--skinny men with narrow shoulders and feminine facial/physical features but the deepest most Alpha voices and tough aggressive personalities...

Can a man still be masculine if he's pregnant?

Possibly

Never

Colton Underwood

....

It depends on my mood, but sometimes I find it really hot when a good-looking man has a femmy voice. Just depends on what I'm horny for in the moment.

Bumpy

Dunno, good question, but I'm attracted to fem/ gay voice so not a problem to me

V8fairy what did you think of mine?

Can a woman still be feminine if she has a butch/dykey voice?

Gay lessons

There are varying degrees of gay voice.

Steven Carter-Bailey from GBBO is gay and has a lisp, but he also has a lowish vocal register, doesn't have a lot of dramatic changes in pitch, and speaks at a pretty slow and even pace and lowish volume, so he sounds gay but also masculine to me.

He still sounds obviously gay, but I remember watching his season of GBBO and loving hearing him talk.

Can a man still be masculine if he doesn't have a penis?

R119 a bit gay, and VERY sensual and sexy!

There's a guy on my FB who I know through another acquaintance. Burly, manly, tough looking, security guard day job. Always posting lipstick clips with his muscular other half. Good lord! Met him one time in person, more pursues dropped out of that mouth than a half off sale at Mayc's.

Host

No no no

OP a man can be femme even when muscular, covered in body-hair and with a deep voice.

So long as he's a sweet girly bimbo who loves taking cock and batting his eyes at men, it's fine.

The older generation of gay men tend to think masculinity is about physical presence. They especially have this weird fixation on hairiness. Today, the focus is on demeanor, interests, athleticism, styles, voice, mannerisms, social tribe, and manner of walking.

As long as it's not carefully crafted gay voice (like Ross Mathews), guys with naturally higher-pitched voices can still come across as masculine. Two examples would be Katt Williams and Conan O'Brien.

Although I wouldn’t call Katt that effeminate, few consider him particularly masculine at all.

Nope

Looks Like Tarzan, Sounds Like Jane.

I used to know a gorilla from the health club who sounded embarrassing, but he had a whatever-degree blackbelt and could (and had on several occasions) beat a homo-basher into a literally unrecognizable pulp. So is that masculine?

R133 Let’s rewrite the world for them LOL

Of course he can’t. Don’t be ridiculous. Once the purse falls out of his mouth, the game is over.

Once a while - I had group fun a few times with a dom top with a very feminine voice.

Of course, Op. Many people think I'm a complete top.

Nopers

Example

Yes.

R141, lol

No he cannot. Katt Williams is the epitome of this.

If you’re unable to hear a guy with a gay sounding voice and see him as masc then I’d say you’re the one with the masculinity problem?