Things that you are extremely funny to you but nobody else

How ironic, you fucking moron.

Singing in the shower and correcting Barry Manilow’s grammar by singing the line:

“There was blood and a single gun shot, but who shot WHOM?” At the Copa. Copa cabana”

[quote] Singing in the shower and correcting Barry Manilow’s grammar by singing the line:

I correct Sondheim in the shower. “If mama WERE married…”

I've giggled over randomly remembered Chrissy Metz stuff I've read on here in real life.

R2 here. I also laugh to myself simply thinking about the Joel and his older neighbor/dog Mitzi situation. It just cracks me up. I think of the old neighbor. The decor. Joel being clueless. Mitzi prancing around. It’s so stupid, I know but it kills me.

“Kick to the cunt bone” a la Stevie Knicks gets me laughing by myself too.

I also laugh to myself thinking up names for French prostitutes. Not drag queens but actual prostitutes.

On my list for French whore names are:

Quelque Fois

De Temps en Temps

Pourquoi Pas

I also laugh at/with that line in “Paris is Burning”, when the MC blares over the microphone …….”YOU. .OWN. EVERY…THING”, as someone is voguing.

I often use this when someone gets all uppity when talking about how great they are.

And this is very obscure, but the very first season of MTV’s Real House, there was this black female named Heather, amongst all these white kids.

In one of those “camera one on ones”, she explains how hard her life has been and how she is going to go out and make it, damn it!

She says into the camera (about herself and defiant of the white kids)…… “Heather got to do fo’ Heather”.

The more obscure the better!

I like this thread. More please

In Sopranos Bobby Baccalaureate is late meeting Tony because his wife (Janice) has him handling all the stuff for the new baby - the car seat , the stroller etc. Tony is annoyed because Bobby is late - Bobby explains he was late with all of the the stuff with the kid - car seat etc - Bobby: “You remember how it was Tone?” …. Tony: (still annoyed) “No - I didn’t do that Shit!”

Baccala - spell check!

[quote]Stevie Knicks

I got a laugh out of that.

That's funny, but also inspiring, r8! I think I'll start every day by shouting that out.

For tv commercials, I always laugh when they list the side effects.

“Dupixent can cause suicidal ideation and diarrhea”.

On those ads, I also laugh at the HR/weak attempt to make all the families multicultural.

I’m Still A Woman To Me

From an old DL thread - the Jimi Hendrix song "The Wind Cries MARY!"

The spoken bridge in "I've Never Been To Me"?

David Sedaris form his book, "Me Talk Pretty One Day". The scene when he goes into a butcher shop in France to get some lambs brains, but in his faltering French, it comes out as, "I'd like to acquire the thoughts of a sheep."

On That 70s show, Red Forman was asked what makes a Belgian waffle Belgian and he responds by saying that they crumble at the hands of the Nazis.

R19. Sedaris when he does the critique of the middle school Christmas play.

When someone asks me where something is, I'm forced to repress my desire to bellow...It's In My VAGIIIIIINAAAA!

Thanks MADTV.

99% of my posts on DataLounge.

This clip of Ace Frehley drunk on the Tom Snyder show in the 70s. I’m not a KISS fan but it cracks me up every time. I guess others did find it funny. Gene Simmons seething is an added treat.

R22 Every now and then my friend and I quote MadTV's "Whitney Ruins the Classics" skit, especially "Something...OVER THAT RAINBOW! littlebirds...They're fly-ing HIIIIIIGH! WHY???" *drops into a squat* Because... I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOUUUU! Beans don't fry in the kitchen..." We also love to quote Celine Dion from one of her concerts and dedicate things to "all of the parents and all of the children in the world."

Some dumb motivational speaker spoke at my high school one year told us that whenever someone asked us how we're doing, we should answer "Living the dream!" I do it sarcastically now but few people I still know get the whole joke.

When a group I'm in is being indecisive about what to do next I like to quote Hey Arnold!: "I say we paint ourselves with tiger stripes AND FREE ALL OF THE AMIMALS FROM THE ZOO!"

[quote][R22] Every now and then my friend and I quote MadTV's "Whitney Ruins the Classics" skit, especially "Something...OVER THAT RAINBOW! littlebirds...They're fly-ing HIIIIIIGH! WHY???" *drops into a squat* Because... I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOUUUU! Beans don't fry in the kitchen..." We also love to quote Celine Dion from one of her concerts and dedicate things to "all of the parents and all of the children in the world."

Debra Wilson's Whitney sketches had so many memorable offhand lines that nobody would grasp in any other context.

They did a few of Celine and I still remember the line Martin Luther King Day Jr.

I’m a Choo-choo Charlie and a class act.

Fuckerface I love you. Fuckerface I need you.

R25. Deborah Wilson is a fucking unreal talent. Always kills me.

“Like sweet Mountain Dew….. doo bee doo bee doo”

“Smokin on the dock of the bay. Gettin high”

And, yes, that squat in Something over the Rainbow. Thanks. You got me to pull it up on YouTube. Needed that laugh. I think the end line is from The Jeffersons???? “Fish don’t fry in the kitchen”.

Str8 men and their OBSESSION w/contact sports. It's homoerotic even to The Lighthouse for the Blind.

"It was 30 years ago today tomorrow that President John F. Kennedy...

Whenever I want a real life I watch this clip from celebrity big brother. It’s like something out of Curb your enthusiasm! Let me set the scene before you watch it:-

Housemate David Gest felt unwell so went off to lie down. Angie Bowie is called to the diary room and told her ex husband David Bowie has died, but she must not tell the other housemates….

Old episodes of Hee Haw.

That henway joke.

Streisand on Oprah- talking endlessly about food.

What a great time she had "eating her brains out" on the vacation she just came from. Even showing pictures of deserts, and giving detailed descriptions of her fav. indulgences .Overeating on thin crust pizza, noshing her way through food markets and eating brie with a whole loaf of bread. At one point Big O get´s almost teary eyed and starts licking her lips white knuckling her seat..

It´s like talking porn to a sex-addict.

You will too lick your sister’s pussy if she gets horny!

When Anita Baker came out with "I Love You Just Because" I was dating a guy in SF who was more into me than I was into him, which was a source of contention. I remember walking down 18th Street with him one day toward Castro, and I was singing the song. Somehow, I thought the lyrics were "I Love You Just Enough". He stopped dead, started laughing, and corrected me. Then we both laughed pretty hard. He was a good guy.

Now every time I hear that song I laugh.

"Don't use ________ if you are allergic to ________ or any of its ingredients."

Well, duh.

I find Spike on Buffy very humorous. I pretend I'm him and say, "Out. For. A. Walk. Bitch", then make the hand gesture. For some reason that cracked me up. I find people driving SUV's wearing masks hilarious. Hermetically sealed in their tank like car. Wearing one. The list is so long, and like the Far Side penguin, I just gotta be me.

Pardon me but your face looks like an asshole.

R Kelly especially Trapped in the Closet. He’s always so damn earnest even when he’s doing something so incredibly foolish and that just makes it so much better.

This scene

Some crazy book I read years ago was listing off the famous and powerful who are actually alien lizard-people, and the list ended "The Royal Family of England, Bill and Hillary Clinton, The Bush Family, Winston Churchill, and Kris Kristofferson."

I still add "and Kris Kristofferson" to the list whenever somebody asks who will be at a party or dinner.

I think it's probably funny to a lot of people... Scott Tenorman's tears of unfathomable sadness at the Chili Con Carnival with him being shamed in front of Radiohead at the same time, was hilarious. (South Park Scott Tenorman Must Die episode)

I had an over zealous micromanager that revered Radiohead to a really weird degree at the time and this made it all the more hilarious.

Toddler weather report. Four years old. First saw on jimmy kümmel . Tried to provide link. Just type in sprinkling vs raining video in YouTube

I live in Tennessee(sorry) and there used to be an ad that ran on the local stations years ago of a Loretta Lynn tribute show. During the ad they would play a medley of her songs and end it with, “You Ain’t Woman Enough…”. Well, I hadn’t heard the song prior to that and would sing “You Ain’t Woman Enough to Be My Man” instead of “take my man.” I still laugh at the side eye my mom gave me.

This post still pops up occasionally and it makes me laugh every time.

[quote]Things that you are extremely funny to you but nobody else

Bad grammar

Every time.

That part in Bojack Horseman where Margo Martindale is acting in an obscure Tennessee Williams play. She sells the fuck out of it and it's not even a real play.

I HAVE ambition SIR. Dreams that do not conform to the expectations of cynics like you. Cynic! Always laughing your cowardly laugh. Well I can laugh too! HA HA HA HA

This accident scene from Final Destination 2 is so over the top it makes me laugh.

This artfully crafted scene from Deadly Friend also giving us hints of what a crazy cunt Kristy Swanson would become.

I change innocent commercial dialogue into something more sinister.

A recent hearing aid commercial....

"Dad, how did you know I'm pregnant?"

"Because I'm the father."

The ‘60s song “Windy” goes: who’s walking down the streets of the city / smiling at everybody she sees…

I replace the opener with an old commercial jingle: Whose underwear is under there? (And giggle thinking Windy is either: special needs, for having a name like that & smiling at everyone; prone to flatulence; imagining everyone in their underwear, like Marcia did on Brady Bunch)

My mother arguing with me that Shania Twain is a lesbian, because “Man, I Feel Like a Woman” is subtext for: Man, I feel like (having) a woman. I can’t unhear that whenever the song comes on. And now I look at That Don’t Impress me Much in a whole new way!

On air strokes.

Watching a B/W student film in a packed auditorium, there’s a montage scene showing the boy & girl characters falling in love. They’re on a picnic & eventually wade in the lake, the whole scene is no dialogue, just background music. The girl splashes the boy & should giggle/tee-hee, except she throws her head back & roars MUAH-HAAA-HAAAA like a sci-fi villain.

I guffawed so loudly, & had the “church giggles” for the rest of the show, that people were turning around in their seats to see what was going on. The friend I went with said I really embarrassed her.

Our other friends went the next night & the “actress” was there for a meet & greet/Q&A session, & our friends said she was indeed every bit as (unintentionally) ditsy in real life as her on-screen character.

This happened well over 20 years ago. A funny friend of mine and I went to see a Broadway play that was TERRIBLE. Appallingly bad. During one long, tedious stretch of the play, we were getting bored and antsy and I could tell people around us were also feeling trapped in hell. My friend turned to me, and in full voice asked, “Do you remember where we left the dildo??” It was just so random, and it still makes me laugh. People around us were trying not to laugh. I’d say at least half the audience, including us, left at intermission.

R58 golden! I found that extremely funny, so you didn't follow the "rules" of the thread title. 🤣😉

A few years back on the DL, maybe a MichFest thread, someone mentioned “fiber artist” and a witty poster corrected, “more like a fibromyalgia artist” and that still cracks me up. I always think about it when I see something about “fiber art.”

R57 oh shit - you just brought back a memory from a student film screening where the film was SO BAD - so very, very terribly, ineptly, incomprehensibly bad - that my (inconsiderate) friend started laughing. We all wanted to, but were suppressing the urge. The guy who made the film was like two rows ahead of us, so this was extremely unkind...especially since we were all trying very hard as an audience hold it together.

But no...my friend is now open-mouth laughing, chortling and looking around at us to encourage us to do the same. The worst part is, he is rocking back and forth in his chair so hard from laughter that the ENTIRE ROW is shaking as he spasms.

I broke. I hated him for being so cruel and overt....but he broke me and I started laughing so fucking hard it was all I could do to muffle the sound, and I couldn't really do that. I lost my shit. He lost his even worse, having succeeded in egging me on...it was a mess. The whole row was exploding with laughter.

For the rest of the 2 minute movie (felt like 10 minutes) I couldn't breathe, couldn't stop convulsing, I just was lost. Dizzy afterwards. Crying. Lying to myself that maybe the "director" didn't notice.

Poor guy.

Student film festivals are hilarious.

Where can I watch some student films?

I was fishing in a johnboat with my younger brother (we were 13 and 14) and father. My brother dropped something on one hand and yelled about it hurting. I said, "And you'll never walk again."

I laughed so hard I almost fell out of the boat. My father was tolerant and my brother didn't get it and told me I was stupid.

I still laugh.

When I was a kid, Ann-Margaret was on TV and my mom told me about the time that she fell off of the stage in Lake Tahoe. I burst out laughing. My mom told me that it wasn't funny, she was seriously hurt, and I shouldn't laugh about it. Well, that just made me laugh even more. My mom got mad and sent me to my room.

I called my dad a cocksucker

And he was a good one, too, r65

An old thread titled something like “let’s be a lesbian potluck” made me laugh really hard.

Any thread title with “FAT WHORES:” in it. Always absurd and rude and hilarious - whether the fat whores are rejoicing or mourning or just being called to attention.

On the old Sasha Baron Cohen Ali G. show, I still laugh when I think about his segment on women’s rights/feminism where he sat down with two very serious feminists and when they said they were lesbians - Ali G. acted all surprised, then got bashful and reverential and said he’s a “big fan” of the lesbians and has seen a ton of their “films.”

Martin Short as Jiminy Glick, on a talk show promoting his ill-fated movie: "It's a murder mystery! And did I DO it, and did I NOT do it, and who might have DONE it?"

[quote]My mother arguing with me that Shania Twain is a lesbian, because “Man, I Feel Like a Woman” is subtext for: Man, I feel like (having) a woman.

I'm with Mom, R55. I always think Shania wants a woman when I hear the song.

At the end of introducing myself: "I have absolutely no idea what we're doing here. Or what I'm doing here, or what this place is about, but I am determined to enjoy myself!"

Debbie Reynolds' line reading of "...it's been suggested that they may have dropped the wrong version."

"She is the most beautiful woman in all of Gotham City."

The Joker, referring to Maggie Gyllenhaal in "Batman Begins."

Margaret Cho as Kim Jong-il

As r2 does with Barry Manilow, and r3 does with Stephen Sondeim, I correct Carly Simon in the shower: "Nobody does it half as WELL as you."

How the fuck did "half as good as you" happen?

When I took a big shit in my uncle’s baseball cap after he booed my Flashdance on the front lawn.

I seriously think Erna is one of the most hilarious posters on DL. I use her lines all the time!

When I talk to my haggy sister, we automatically say “conversatia, lamentatia, etc.”

We often say to each other “Correlatia does not equal causatia!” And we laugh like retards every time.

The whole Pepsi internal marketing document by Peter Arnell that got leaked.

Any interview of his from back in the day has me rolling at his poseur flexing.

^ Also the Tropicana debacle. He just gets himself so wound up, I just start pounding the table I’m laughing so hard if I come upon an old article talking about the half-orange shaped nipple-cum-cap that no one could open.

On Locke and Key, Mutuku threatens to viciously kill the kids, then Nina comes in. Mutuku reverts to Mr. Charming and leaves. Nina sighs "what a nice guy."

Any Thomas Friedman “observation.”

They’re exactly like Peggy Hill’s musings column.

The movie Pure Luck.

The trucking craze movie Convoy. If it’s on, I drop everything and watch it.

This fraupacalypse destroyed bee cake saga I came upon years ago on Metafilter.

The slum hippie prudery responders chastising the cake maker are the perfect touch.

This song, sung by this very nelly performer.

Streisand being honest about her motivation for singing.

Money.

It kinda ruffels the feathers of the worshippers AND haters that´s very amusing to watch

I still remember this old article Lindy West wrote years ago. It began with the sentence "Aham and I got engaged..." however the drop-cap used made it look like it said "A ham and I got engaged..."

Very funny.

^ Ha!

Ha! Ha!

I was at UCLA when they screened Sophia Coppola’s student film at Melnitz Hall and I said out loud ‘What a fucking nepotism shit show it was’. And then they asked each director of said student film to stand, and little did I know that she was seated right in front me and heard me say it. I was correct, of course.

Double Anal In A Double Bed

I get lost in your thighs and I feeeeel my penis rise...

As for Taylor Swift? Aretha said, "Okay, uh... great gowns, beautiful gowns."

Tracey Ullman in “Small Time Crooks” spending almost one minute removing accent pillows from her large bed. I couldn’t stop laughing in the theatre. The decor of the bedroom was so overdone.

The scene in Forrest Gump where he starts running and his leg braces come flying off. I was laughing hysterically in a packed theater and it took me a moment to realize I was the only one. I hate that fucking movie.

That happened to me when I watched Kill Bill Volume 1.

The part where The Bride chops off Sofie Fatale's arm with a fountain of blood, I was laughing my ass off and realized that I was the only one. My friend gave me a look and later said that people were staring at me.

This is a QT film right? Fucking Poseurs!

R93, you're not the only one

Piggybacking off of R32's post, Tiffany/New York's response to whether she will apologize to Angela Bowie:

[quote] In Sopranos Bobby Baccalaureate

Oh I remember that guy. He used to lord it over us because he went to cawledge.

the Grammy scene with Tony Orlando/Rita Coolidge in the 1970s version of “A Star Is Born” with Barbra Streisand and Kris Kristofferson

If someone near me gets hurt. I laugh. My roommate in college fell from a ladder, a stray tree branch hit my grandmother in the head. I was dying laughing. It’s difficult to hide and it really irritates the injured person!

I LOL at every caftan and earring joke. It is my duty as a DLer.

At the old Ziegfeld Movie theater in nyc (RIP), my friend and I got asked to leave during that Brad Pitt movie Legends of the Fall. We were stone cold sober but it was sooooooooo bad from the first five minutes. And we kept laughing. Then laughing harder. And harder. We had to exit out that side door

I love you r101

R99 when me and my younger sister were little kids, she accidentally fractured her in a kickabout (casual soccer game) we were having in our garden with our dad. She was hurt and crying, and I was so afraid and upset that my nervous system kicked in too hard and I started laughing uncontrollably at the same time as crying. To this day, she's never let me live it down.

Footballer bete-noire Jack Grealish getting kicked or diving on the pitch, as is his wont.

Everyone else watching seems to find it either enraging or saddening, where I just think it's sauuur funny.

Every time I see scallops on a menu or at the store I think "It's Top Chef, not Top Scallop" and internally giggle.

R104 it’s funny because he also finds it funny. The boys a natural ❤️

I grew up in the country. Some kids strung a heavy wire across a road between two trees. I didn't know it but met up with them as they stood at a short distance, and before I knew it a motorcyclist came speeding by. He wasn't wearing a helmet and his head just came clean off. The body on the bike kept going until a turn in the road made it crash, spurting blood out the top of his neck. The head kept traveling, too, but not as far. There was something about it that was so surreal I gasped and started laughing and before I knew it we were all on the ground rolling around laughing.

All at once we all jumped off and took off. They were never caught and I never told anyone, until now.

It turned out to be someone who was just going through the area who liked country roads.

I wish it would have been R76, but she was too old to be on a Harley 20 years ago.

When my cat takes a crap and then runs out of the room because she can’t stand the smell.

R101 reminded me of when I went to see the movie 300 and was laughing my ass off at the queeny villain and the general homoerotic campiness of the whole thing. The straight guys in the audience were not amused.

Aw, r17, that was me! I didn't think anyone thought it was funny.