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Create the Most Atrocious/Offensive Stage Musical You Can Imagine

Let's rip off "The Producers," and create some ideas for musicals that would be shocking, inappropriate, or just plain unwatchable. Extra points if you give it a catchy name a la Andrew Lloyd Webber.

I'll start with my idea: "TUBE: The Terri Schiavo Musical." It could open at the Burt Reynolds Dinner Theater in Florida, and cause a riot of bad reviews, followed by an actual riot.

by Anonymousreply 237January 12, 2022 3:49 PM

"Dahmer!"- Ansel Elgort stars as the most notorious serial cannibal ever. Songs include "I Love Asian (But I'm Hungry An Hour Later); "With 2 You Get Eggroll"; "Don't Look In The Icebox". Also starring Bernadette Peters as the lovestruck Landlady who's in denial. At the Emmanuel Streisand Theatre.

by Anonymousreply 1December 13, 2021 3:32 AM

"Diana the Musical".

I mean, really. Why come up with parodies when reality is so fucking horrifying?

by Anonymousreply 2December 13, 2021 3:34 AM

"Kyle, get your gun!"

by Anonymousreply 3December 13, 2021 3:38 AM

Jonestown the Musical featuring "What You Talkin' Bout Dad?," "White Night" and the finale "Grape Stomp" during which every audience member gets a cup of Flavor-Aid!

by Anonymousreply 4December 13, 2021 3:45 AM

"Choker: The JonBenet Ramsey Story."

Songs include "Only Winners Can Sleep," "Why, Momma, Why?" and "Burke the Smirk."

by Anonymousreply 5December 13, 2021 3:45 AM

"COSBY": The story of how Bill Cosby was framed, with such numbers as "That Dyke Lied", "Sometimes Rape Can Feel Mmm Mmm Good" and "I'll Be Puddin' It In Your Drink, Then Puddin' It In Your Stink".

by Anonymousreply 6December 13, 2021 3:53 AM

You people are not right. You need Jesus.

by Anonymousreply 7December 13, 2021 3:55 AM

Think "Cruising " the musical but instead of it set in the S&M gay world, it's trannies. The murderer is a black lesbian TERF And the white straight male cop saves the day. Enjooooooooy.

by Anonymousreply 8December 13, 2021 3:57 AM

"Pool party!" A midwest boy hoping to make it big in Hollywood gets trapped at one of Mr. Singer's soirees.

by Anonymousreply 9December 13, 2021 3:58 AM

Last House on the Left.......the musical

by Anonymousreply 10December 13, 2021 3:59 AM

“That’s My Manson”, featuring such highlight hits as “Sharon’s Carrion” and “The LoBianco Lobotomy”.

by Anonymousreply 11December 13, 2021 4:01 AM

"Barrels of Fun: the Adventures of Chris Watts"

by Anonymousreply 12December 13, 2021 4:04 AM

Connie’s A Ho Down at the HoJo. Songs include: Raping in the Rain, My Turn: The Gangs Here, Black Man, Black Man, The Man Who Got Away (with my purse and panties), and Satisfaction

by Anonymousreply 13December 13, 2021 4:07 AM

A Josh Duggar musical featuring "I Dug Her," "God Bless The Children (After I Fuck 'Em All)," and "Sister Can I Sleep With You Tonight?"

by Anonymousreply 14December 13, 2021 4:07 AM

Divinely, Delightfully, Delicious. (A Jeffrey Dahmer Tribute)

Featuring the newly re-worked Judy Garland hit, "How Could I Ignore, the Boy Next Door" (The minute I saw his face, I knew he was just my taste. My only regret, is once we've met, I won't be sure how long to baste)

Are Direction by John Wayne Gacy

by Anonymousreply 15December 13, 2021 4:09 AM

Dream's Requiem!: The Musical

Based on a Novel by Hubert Selby, Jr.

Directed by Julie Taymor

A Walt Disney Production

by Anonymousreply 16December 13, 2021 4:10 AM

They never made Mandingo into a stage show, did they?

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 17December 13, 2021 4:13 AM

"Cool Cats." A show about middle-aged Black gigolos. With songs like "The Mandingo Ate My Baby," "The Buck Who Fucks for a Buck," "I'm Gonna Suck You, Sucka!"

by Anonymousreply 18December 13, 2021 4:16 AM

Sandy Hook: The Musical

Featuring Adam Lanza performing a number while playing "Dance Dance Revolution"

by Anonymousreply 19December 13, 2021 4:17 AM

"Plandemic: the Musical" with Laura Osnes and Chad Kimball. Featuring the songs: "Fauci, Don't Give Me an Ouchie!", "My Little China Flu" and "Free to Kill You and Me."

by Anonymousreply 20December 13, 2021 4:18 AM

There already was a Columbine stage production. Not sure if they sang in it though.

by Anonymousreply 21December 13, 2021 4:18 AM

HUMAN CENTIPEDE: The Musical.

by Anonymousreply 22December 13, 2021 4:19 AM

Springtime for Shitler: The Donald Trump musical

by Anonymousreply 23December 13, 2021 4:20 AM

If you liked 1776, you'll love.....

January 6th!!!!!

Starring Jeremy Jordan as Zip Tie Guy

by Anonymousreply 24December 13, 2021 4:22 AM

Vairst Victim: The Ivana Trump Saga.

I almost wrote "Queen: The Leona Helmsley Story," but that would make a fucking excellent Ryan Murphy series, starring Catherine Zeta-Jones as the bitch, and maybe Charlize Theron as 1980s Ivana Trump.

by Anonymousreply 25December 13, 2021 4:23 AM

Staging “Porgy and Bess” with an all-albino cast.

by Anonymousreply 26December 13, 2021 4:25 AM

"Upside Downey", a family-friendly look at prison rape based on RDJ's past experience in the hoosegow for being a smacked out dumb-ass. Features the songs: "I Loved You in Chaplin; I Love Me in You" and "That's Why They Call it the Pokey!" Starring DL fave Tom Daley as a young heroin-addled RDJ.

by Anonymousreply 27December 13, 2021 4:31 AM

"Christmas Parade" featuring the Dancin' Grannies of Waukesha

by Anonymousreply 28December 13, 2021 4:32 AM

The Octopus Conundrun

Octopuses do not have any bones with the exception of their beaks. So if you are responsible and depraved enough to be literally the life support of your 8 limbed friend, you can debeak it like how you’d declaw a cat and then push your member into its feed chute.

You can then let it subsist on your baby batter.

The Octopus is smart. Very smart. It will learn that without its beak, it cannot feed on anything else but your human seed that has to be milked from you.

Every morning, you will feel your clothes slide off and a damp weight on your lower half.

The sensation creeps up on your body until most of the jiggly mass has enveloped the entire length. It will start pumping as fast as it can for it is hungry.

The animal gyrates its empty stomach and the folds of its brain rubbing on your glands, begging for nutrition.

You climax and give the marine creature’s breakfast. The pumping slows down but doesn’t stop to milk out the last few drops of its meal.

Looking into its yellow animal eyes, it looks back with a thousand-yard stare. This will be routine for all of its meals for the rest of its 3-5 years on this god forsaken planet.

by Anonymousreply 29December 13, 2021 4:33 AM

MIDNIGHT IN PARIS: THE PARIS HILTON STORY. Music by Kathie Lee Gifford.

LOVE IS A VIRUS. A CV-19 romantic romp set among the elderly residents and staff at a nursing home (based loosely on A MIDSUMMER NIGHTS DREAM).

HUNGER GAMES: A NEW MUSICAL.

by Anonymousreply 30December 13, 2021 4:34 AM

R29, I think you have the wrong thread, and, possibly, planet and/or dimension.

by Anonymousreply 31December 13, 2021 4:35 AM

Chris Burrous: The Operetta

by Anonymousreply 32December 13, 2021 4:35 AM

"Scummy Motherfucker" - a tale of trashy neighbors in Plains Township, featuring Jimmmmaaay.

by Anonymousreply 33December 13, 2021 4:38 AM

Black Lives Dont Matter

A Proud Boys Production, featuring an all black face cast. Song highlights include:

You Aint Gettin No Reparations

Uncle Tom my Hero

You Don't Know Me

Burning Down the Town

We Need Mo Po-Lice

Encore by Smash and Grab Brothers

by Anonymousreply 34December 13, 2021 4:39 AM

Bullets Over (and in) Bonnie Lee Blakey

Songs-

Roll Down the Window (Robert’s Theme)

Last Shot at Lasagna

Just a Whore with Glass in Her Hair and Stars in Her Eyes

Slut’n on the Corner Sunset and Vine

by Anonymousreply 35December 13, 2021 4:43 AM

Working Title: The Vegetable Garden. Final Title: A Little Bag of Tricks. (The Sonny von Bulow Story.)

by Anonymousreply 36December 13, 2021 4:44 AM

Throat Goat - Nancy's Fancy

Featuring such hits as "Mr, Gorbachev, Tear Down That Gag Reflex"

And

"I did NOT Trade Arms for Sausages"

As well as the all time hit

"Everyone For Abortion Just Wasn't Swallowed"

by Anonymousreply 37December 13, 2021 4:45 AM

WOODY AND MIA AND SOON-YI AND DYLAN

Cause you never know where you'll meet the right girl! Just don't tell Mom.

by Anonymousreply 38December 13, 2021 4:45 AM

ALTERED BOYS

Adapted from SPOTLIGHT, the story of the Boston Archdiocese's coverup of child molestation.

by Anonymousreply 39December 13, 2021 4:50 AM

"A Little Black Book - Jeffrey and Ghislaine Story" featuring the songs "Our Little Island", "The Townhouse of Fun", "Daddy's Got Somethin' For You" and "Andrew is a Naughty Boy."

by Anonymousreply 40December 13, 2021 4:51 AM

The Three Wives Club, starring Steve Bannon, Newt Gingrich and the ghost of Rush Limbaugh. Contains the hits: "Somebody Actually Fucked These Hideous Things"; "(Manson) Family Values" and "Squirtin' and Spurtin' (The Male Lactation Lambada!)". Also features the controversial number "Dick's on My Back" where Roger Stone strips down to a thong and his Nixon tattoo.

by Anonymousreply 41December 13, 2021 4:51 AM

JUICE! AN OJ SIMPSON CELEBRATION

by Anonymousreply 42December 13, 2021 4:54 AM

THE KARDASHIAN TRILOGY

SUNDAY IN THE PARK WITH GEORGE W BUSH

A LITTLE NIGHT MOTHER

by Anonymousreply 43December 13, 2021 4:57 AM

None of these can beat the "Facts of Life" musical someone on Datalounge invented years ago. The names of the song titles were all centered on various FoL episodes everyone seems to remember (for no reason), like Blair taking 2nd place in the poetry contest by plagiarizing Emily Dickinson.

by Anonymousreply 44December 13, 2021 4:58 AM

"Three's A Crowd" , inspired by Paul Bernardo and Karla Homolka's crime spree. Featuring the hit song: "She Was My Sister, But I had to Kill Her."

by Anonymousreply 45December 13, 2021 5:01 AM

"Serial lover"...an imaginative "What if" love triangle in prison between Jeffrey Dahmer, Larry Eyler and John Wayne Gacy.

by Anonymousreply 46December 13, 2021 5:03 AM

Forever Neverland: A Tribute to Michael Jackson

"Thank Heaven For Little Boys"

"Sippin' On Jesus Juice"

"I Know What Boys Like"

"Pretty Young Thing"

by Anonymousreply 47December 13, 2021 5:11 AM

The Front Hole Monologues, starring Elliott Page

by Anonymousreply 48December 13, 2021 5:12 AM

Happy Valley: The Penn State Musical. Nathan Lane IS Joe Paterno. With Mandy Patinkin as Jerry Sandusky

by Anonymousreply 49December 13, 2021 5:18 AM

I Don't Geeve a Fuck About Christmas, An Updated Christmas Carol with Melania Trump as Scrooge

by Anonymousreply 50December 13, 2021 5:19 AM

BLM The Musical! Songs Rootin' Tootin' Lootin' It's Whitey's fault Reparation ( sang to Oklahoma)

by Anonymousreply 51December 13, 2021 5:21 AM

R25 There has been a Leona Helmsley musical, performed at 54 Below starring Tovah Feldshuh. It basically was a reading to get producers interested. I doubt there were any takers.

by Anonymousreply 52December 13, 2021 5:42 AM

"Cat!", the musical version of "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof". Big Daddy's 11:00 number, "Mendacity", would be a definite crowd-pleaser, and Maggie's Declaration of "Those little no-neck monsters" would have the audience in stitches.

by Anonymousreply 53December 13, 2021 5:45 AM

Oklahoma (city bombing)!

by Anonymousreply 54December 13, 2021 5:52 AM

"Lint: The Musical".

by Anonymousreply 55December 13, 2021 5:53 AM

My Fair Ladyboy

by Anonymousreply 56December 13, 2021 5:54 AM

The Tiger King

by Anonymousreply 57December 13, 2021 5:57 AM

Grease (fire): the Datalounge Musical

by Anonymousreply 58December 13, 2021 5:58 AM

"Naked Boys Singeing": a hilarious musical in which a dozen okay-looking guys with nothing-special voices drop trou and then burn off their pubes by accident. Features "Heating Blanket Gonna Getcha When the Wire Shorts Out!" and "What Oh What is That Horrible Smell?"

by Anonymousreply 59December 13, 2021 5:59 AM

Phantom of the Bathhouse

Follow a young man’s journey across the country visiting bathhouses.

by Anonymousreply 60December 13, 2021 6:00 AM

The anon cumdump. Each top is different with their own genre and fills the cumdump in his own way.

by Anonymousreply 61December 13, 2021 6:03 AM

Rent (to Own):

Follow 6 or 7 quirky bohemians as they get caught up in a rent-to-own scheme and go belly-up chasing the American dream.

by Anonymousreply 62December 13, 2021 6:04 AM

I could do this all night.

by Anonymousreply 63December 13, 2021 6:05 AM

Audrey Hepburn! So nice of you to stop by.

by Anonymousreply 64December 13, 2021 6:06 AM

JFK the musical. Starring Hugh Jackman with a terrible fake Boston accent as John F. Kennedy, Lin-Manuel Miranda as Lee Harvey Oswald and Adele Dazeem as Jackie. Featuring “The Troll on the Knoll” a reworking of The Beatles song “Fool on the Hill”, a remake of the Guns ‘N’ Roses song “November Rain” and “How Do You Solve a Problem Like Earl Warren?”

by Anonymousreply 65December 13, 2021 6:26 AM

That’s actually not atrocious, r65.

by Anonymousreply 66December 13, 2021 6:31 AM

"Edward Penishands", a musical gay porno.

by Anonymousreply 67December 13, 2021 6:33 AM

"Patriot Day: The Jan. 6th Musical"- Willie Nelson, Toby Keith, Mickey Rourke, Kris Kristofferson, Randy Quaid and Shelly Duvall star in this ensemble tribute to the men and women who protested a stolen election. With Michael Crawford as Donald J. Trump.

by Anonymousreply 68December 13, 2021 6:34 AM

"Salem: The Satan Musical" starring Susan Lucci as Dr. Marlena Evans.

by Anonymousreply 69December 13, 2021 6:38 AM

From the makers of "Diana: the Musical":

"John-John: The Musical." Starring Aaron Tveit as JFK, Jr.; Fantasia as Carolyn Bessette; Laura Bell Bundy as Daryl Hannah; American Pharoah as Sarah Jessica Parker; and Billy Porter as Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis. With the recorded voice of Anderson Cooper as the voice of JFK, Sr., speaking to his son from The Great Beyond.

by Anonymousreply 70December 13, 2021 6:47 AM

Dawson: The Musical

The story of a young man who goes from one to 12 to 50 loads on a single Weekend.

With a guest a guest appearance by the a Wriggleyville Cumdump.

by Anonymousreply 71December 13, 2021 6:55 AM

Glorious Me – Meghan The Musical

A thrilling reimagining of Jesus Christ Superstar. Sing along to its beautiful calipso hit: "Hitching My Wagon To A Ginger Donkey".

by Anonymousreply 72December 13, 2021 7:06 AM

"Tuesdays with my Abortionist Dr. Morrie: The Helen Lawson Story"

After a while, he said, "Helen, let's cut to the chase - you just come here every Tuesday afternoon, and I'll scrape out whatever's in your uterus.

Once in the early 1960s, he said, "Helen, I don't know managed it, but you had a baby in there from every single member of the Rat Pack - there was even a little black Sammy Davis Jr fetus in there with a glass eye!"

Afterwards, we'd clean up and go for a drink at Spagos...start the process all over again

by Anonymousreply 73December 13, 2021 7:10 AM

"Up with $cientology!"

The feel-good musical of the season!

You've never seen a gal as big and old as Kirstie Alley dance!

John Travolta has hair again!

And Tammy Cruise's face actually moves!

Don't Tell Me These Aren't Miracles!

by Anonymousreply 74December 13, 2021 7:16 AM

R14 the working title is Diddler on the Roof

by Anonymousreply 75December 13, 2021 7:18 AM

Beauty and the Beast, refreshed for 2021 starring the gay bachelor and his new hubby.

by Anonymousreply 76December 13, 2021 7:20 AM

Singing in the Acid Rain : a climate change story

by Anonymousreply 77December 13, 2021 7:23 AM

The Triangle Shirtwaist Fire: The Musical!

A toe-tapping revue about young immigrant women burning to death in a factory fire that could have been avoided if the fire doors in the building had not been nailed shut by the owners (to prevent the girls from taking cigarette breaks).

Fun fact! The owners of the company were charged $10 for negligence and then nailed the fire doors shut in their new location.

Yay capitalism!!!!!

by Anonymousreply 78December 13, 2021 7:23 AM

"Ya Could've Been a Lot Thinner - The Real Karen Carpenter Story"

As told from the point of view of her mother Agnes

"Superstars Don't Have Fat Asses!"

"You've Only Just Began - To Diet!"

by Anonymousreply 79December 13, 2021 7:25 AM

"No You're Lying: The Kellyanne Conway Story"

by Anonymousreply 80December 13, 2021 7:36 AM

Monday in the Park with Amy. Taylor Swift as Amy Cooper, Kanye West as Christian Cooper, and Sarah Silverman as the (off stage) 9-11 operator.

Musical numbers include "Let My Canine Go," a paean of leash free dog walking; "Don't Offer My Henry Any of Your Soul Food," and "Help! There's Black Man Threatening Me!"

by Anonymousreply 81December 13, 2021 7:39 AM

"Calling the Hawgs: The Sarah Huckabee Sanders Story"

Papa, Will I Ever Be As Big as You?

Torturing Dogs in Arkansas

And The Whole All-You-Can Eat Golden Corral Buffet Finale!

by Anonymousreply 82December 13, 2021 7:41 AM

"Everything Goes Toot-Toot: My Struggles with Irritable Bowel Syndrome"

by Anonymousreply 83December 13, 2021 7:48 AM

Jewface - a Jew Who Really Loves Jesus: The Kathy Lee Gifford Story

Too many songs to count!

by Anonymousreply 84December 13, 2021 7:50 AM

Daddy's Little Princess: The Mackenzie Phillips Story

by Anonymousreply 85December 13, 2021 7:53 AM

Sunset Boulevard.

by Anonymousreply 86December 13, 2021 8:06 AM

[bold]Manwhore! Cocktease! Dumbass! The Brandon Cody Musical[/bold]

Everybody's favorite functionally illiterate gay-for-pay grifter is the toast of the Great White Way!

Thrill to such unforgettable numbers as

"I Am Not a Prostatute"

"I Dreamed I Could Spell"

"My Butthole's Exit-Only (But It's Easy to Pretend)"

"He Made Me Lift His Caftan"

by Anonymousreply 87December 13, 2021 8:27 AM

Donald Christ SuperTrump, the smash hit story of how one man, believing himself to be god, tried to create a new religion. Features the songs ‘I don’t know how to vote for him’, ‘This Hillary must die’, ‘Any lie will do’ and ‘Take that look of disgust off your face’.

by Anonymousreply 88December 13, 2021 8:36 AM

Oh Dyatlov!

One act. No bathroom breaks required.

by Anonymousreply 89December 13, 2021 8:38 AM

Paralysed : The Christopher Reeve Story...... Sarah Jessica Parker as the horse... Hugh Jackman as Reeve before the accident, Stephen Hawkin after....show stopping tunes ; Limp Dick and I Can Still Use My Tongue and My Colostomy Bag

by Anonymousreply 90December 13, 2021 8:40 AM

Rust: The Musical

The story of a film production gone horribly wrong. Featuring the numbers "The Baldwin Bullet," "It's Not My Fault," "Prop Master (You're No Master At All)," and "Halyna in Heaven."

by Anonymousreply 91December 13, 2021 1:23 PM

Fyre! The Musical!

Featuring Denzel Washington as Ja Rule. Bradley Cooper as Billy McFarland.

Attendees will receive a cheese sandwich and a 6x6in piece of a piss soaked mattress.

by Anonymousreply 92December 13, 2021 2:07 PM

"White Supremacy Christmas" Carlson Tucker and Sean Hannity become romantically involved with Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert and team up to save a failing Florida Resort.

by Anonymousreply 93December 13, 2021 2:13 PM

Jared!

Songs include: This Sub Looks Delicious (But Your Children Look Better), Am I Too Fat For The Kids?, and No One Eats Subway In Prison.

by Anonymousreply 94December 13, 2021 2:21 PM

OP, Family Guy beat you to the Terry Schiavo musical. Catchy tune, too.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 95December 13, 2021 2:25 PM

The Holocaust on Ice, ovens and sequins galore. A fun and family friendly show to keep us all in remembrance. Don't forget to bring nanna.

by Anonymousreply 96December 13, 2021 2:31 PM

As soon as I saw OPs post, R95 popped in my head. I can no longer hear the name Teri Schiavo without thinking: “Oh, oh, oh Teri Schiavo is kind of alive-o!”

by Anonymousreply 97December 13, 2021 2:34 PM

“I’m bigger and better than you- the lia Thomas story”

“External ovaries, internal woman”

“My clit is bigger than yours”

“Work harder girls”

“Testosterone schmestosteeone”

by Anonymousreply 98December 13, 2021 2:36 PM

"Rickety Bridge: The Delphi Murders Musical." featuring the songs:

- "Hey, Guys, Down the HIll"

- "Me and my iPhone"

- " Give me Liberty or Give me Abbie"

by Anonymousreply 99December 13, 2021 2:36 PM

Matthew Shepard Superstar

A play portraying Matthew Shepard as the gay Jesus who died for our sins so we could have rights.

by Anonymousreply 100December 13, 2021 2:37 PM

Gabby Petito: The Musical

“Feelin So Alive in this Van”, “Chokings”, “Help Me Officer”, “Under the Shrubs”

by Anonymousreply 101December 13, 2021 2:38 PM

R100 It's called "Laramie." Been running for over a decade.

by Anonymousreply 102December 13, 2021 2:41 PM

Chrissy Teigen: My Miscarried Eyebrows (A Musical in 10 Interminable Acts)

Meghan Markle: A Day at the Races/It's All About Me!

(Both productions will sell out immediately due to the stars buying up all the tickets on the first day, depleting paper supplies for elementary schools for a week.)

Brought to you by Nars Iz Tick Nation

by Anonymousreply 103December 13, 2021 2:43 PM

[quote] You people need Jesus

Only if he’s got a halfway decent vibrato

by Anonymousreply 104December 13, 2021 2:47 PM

"Propellers: The Lauren Scruggs Story," featuring a show-stopping first act with acrobats vaulting back and forth through giant spinning jet engine blades. Also featuring the hit songs:

- No, Eye Don't

- Walkin', Walkin', Ouch

- Give Me a Hand (Preferably a Left One)

by Anonymousreply 105December 13, 2021 3:02 PM

"A Very Heavy Burtation: The Serene Branson Story," featuring the musical numbers:

"Stroke Me, Stroke Me"

"A Very Derisan Day"

"Toosh De La Pit, Le Had Le Pit"

by Anonymousreply 106December 13, 2021 5:08 PM

Birth of a Nation on Ice.

With: Darky Larky Time, We're All O-K-K-K, and Lynch'em High, Lynch 'em Low.

by Anonymousreply 107December 13, 2021 5:25 PM

The ending of the original West Side Story is heartbreaking and sobering. Still brings a tear to my eye.

by Anonymousreply 108December 13, 2021 5:27 PM

An electronic opera based on Lindsay Lohan's life as an expat.

by Anonymousreply 109December 13, 2021 5:30 PM

R108 Sorry. Wrong thread.

by Anonymousreply 110December 13, 2021 5:31 PM

“Riding the Comet: The Heaven’s Gate Musical”

A reimagining of the suicide cult’s story where they succeed in teleporting to the spaceship Hale-Bopp. “The Reunion of Ti and Do” is the standout number, along with “Brand New Pair of Nikes” and “$5 in My Pocket”.

by Anonymousreply 111December 13, 2021 5:32 PM

The descent into poverty and madness of Sculpture Dave Poulin, creator of the original bronze statue of Lucille Ball in Celeron, N.Y., who gives up his passion out of the shame and ridcule. It will be like a small town Rent hybrid with The Agony and the Ecstasy, and Michelangelo and Lucille Ball will be the Greek Chorus.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 112December 13, 2021 5:37 PM

Trading Gashes - Alok Vaid-Menon and Elliot Page play each other in a sassy, heart wrenching, and hear-touching avant garde piece.

Alok Vaid-Menon is a beauty and a revelation - as the young Hollywood starlet Ellen Page.

Elliot shows true range as a female masquerading as a male who masquerades as an exotic, trans-border genderfluid illusionist Alok Vaid-Menon, even singing several arias in Punjabi, a language Alok does not speak.

The heroic life journeys are played out simultaneously in a theatre in the round setting. With lyrics by Judith Butler and Edward Said and repurposed music composed by the late Sophie and Lil' Peep.

by Anonymousreply 113December 13, 2021 5:50 PM

I'm Dreaming of a WHITE Christmas: The Tucker Carlson Musical

by Anonymousreply 114December 13, 2021 6:12 PM

Jonestown!!!! The loves, lives and perils of Jim Jonrs snd his misfit motley crew of devotees as they prepare to enter the holy land.

by Anonymousreply 115December 13, 2021 6:56 PM

A Room With The View. The musical no one wanted to see. Starring Billy Porter as Whoopi Goldberg, Harvey Fierstein in dual roles as Joy Behar and Rosie O’Donnell, Bai Ling as Lisa Ling, a coat hanger with a blonde wig as Elizabeth Hasslebeck and Marisa Jarrt Winokur as Meghan McCain. Special guest appearance by Mandy Patinkin as Meghan’s daddy.

by Anonymousreply 116December 13, 2021 7:29 PM

You're A Bad Girl: The Casey Anthony Musical

Nancy Grace gets two musical numbers of her very own called "Tot Mom" and "The Devil Is Dancing Tonight." Casey sings "I don't want my daughter. But how can I slaughter her without them catching me?"

by Anonymousreply 117December 13, 2021 7:40 PM

Cuomos: A Tale of Two Ass-Grabbers

Featuring: -Grandmas got the 'Rona -Do you like old balls? -Fredo's follies

by Anonymousreply 118December 13, 2021 9:23 PM

[Quote] Grease (fire): the Datalounge Musical

This deserves its own thread.

by Anonymousreply 119December 13, 2021 10:46 PM

"Sorry Antivaxxer: The Musical!"

Noted for its ventilator ballet, and stunning climax where the main character, Dee Plorable, sticks a floor lamp up her cunt.

Features the rousing song "Beep...Beep...Beep...Beep...Beep...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep..."

by Anonymousreply 120December 13, 2021 10:52 PM

[Quote] "Scummy Motherfucker" - a tale of trashy neighbors in Plains Township, featuring Jimmmmaaay.

Love it, R33. I propose the following songs for the roster:

"Brian Baranski's Answering Machine" "His House Looks Great, He Must Be Gay" "Pussy Pussy Pussy!" "Don't Call Spaide a Spade" "Ugh OH Ugh, I'm shot!" "Ode to MAGA-Tards" "If Only (I Had a Snowblower)"

by Anonymousreply 121December 13, 2021 10:56 PM

GAH! Reformatting the above:

"Brian Baranski's Answering Machine"

"His House Looks Great, He Must Be Gay"

"Pussy Pussy Pussy!"

"Don't Call Spaide a Spade"

"Ugh OH Ugh, I'm shot!"

"Ode to MAGA-Tards"

"If Only (I Had a Snowblower)"

by Anonymousreply 122December 13, 2021 10:58 PM

[quote] Uncle Tom my Hero

I hate to have to keep pointing this out to people but Uncle Tom IS the fucking hero of the book, Uncle Tom's Cabin.

[quote] "Patriot Day: The Jan. 6th Musical"- Willie Nelson, Toby Keith, Mickey Rourke, Kris Kristofferson, Randy Quaid and Shelly Duvall star in this ensemble tribute to the men and women who protested a stolen election. With Michael Crawford as Donald J. Trump.

Willie Nelson and Kris Kristofferson are both known to be liberal Democrats. In the last election Willie campaigned for Beto. Rourke supported Biden and said he cast his first ever vote for Biden/Harris. And was vocal about his dislike of Trump. I don't know how Crawford feels about Trump but based on appearance he would make a good DJT.

by Anonymousreply 123December 13, 2021 11:12 PM

[quote]Grease (fire): the Datalounge Musical

[quote]This deserves its own thread.

It already has one.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 124December 13, 2021 11:28 PM

Nathan Lane in Hell's Belle: The Lindsey Graham Musical. Featuring Ben Platt as intern #1

by Anonymousreply 125December 13, 2021 11:50 PM

R122, don't forget, "You shoulda kept your mouth shut!"

by Anonymousreply 126December 14, 2021 12:28 AM

Nothing Compares to Uganda

Insane, searing, scatological but ultimately upbeat Dadaist musical calvacade through Ugandan history and popular culture. Music, lyrics, and book by Kanye West, Sinead O'Connor and Eddy Kenzo. Production numbers include "Eat Da Poo Poo", "Big Zaddy Dada", "Man Go Up in a Man" and "Delicate Drown"

by Anonymousreply 127December 14, 2021 12:29 AM

Thanks R124! 😊

by Anonymousreply 128December 14, 2021 12:54 AM

R126, THIS is the HEADLINER! 👍

by Anonymousreply 129December 14, 2021 12:57 AM

R91, you made me laugh out loud, you horrible bitch.

by Anonymousreply 130December 14, 2021 2:52 AM

Hilaria: “I Ass You to Leave, I Ass You to Go Away (Please Don’t Go)”, “Her Name is Halyna!”, “Cucumber (How Do You Say in English?)”, “I Mix Languages (So Insecure)”, “Babies”, “Me in Panty with Baby”

by Anonymousreply 131December 14, 2021 11:57 AM

Oh god there are some fucking gems here. MORE!

I kind of miss the murder/suicide threads. I wonder how the new family is settling in at Jeff's house? If he's a ghost, (should such things exist) I'll bet he's a protective one.

If there are any updates, please point me to the thread.

Sorry for derailing this one.

by Anonymousreply 132December 14, 2021 12:21 PM

Making a Kwanza Cake - The Sandra Lee and Chris Cuomo Love Story

"You're Only Piercing Your Nipples for That Gal at Work"

"You Couldn't Cook Even If You Were Sober!"

"You're Such a Bitch - You Make Me Govern Badly!"

"No, You're Offensive to Black People!"

by Anonymousreply 133December 14, 2021 12:33 PM

*Playbill Correction "The Sandra Lee and Andrew Cuomo Love Story"

by Anonymousreply 134December 14, 2021 12:37 PM

I thought Aida was pretty awful. I also thought Rent was pretty bad- but not nearly as bad as Aida.

by Anonymousreply 135December 14, 2021 12:42 PM

All Black Guys Look Alike: The Alice Siebold Rape

Including the hit song, "It Must Be Him"

by Anonymousreply 136December 14, 2021 1:25 PM

Sorority House Covid Blues

"This Is Killing Our Rush!" sung by the girls of Alpha OMICRON Pi

"Tell Us About It!" sung by the girls of Delta Delta Delta

by Anonymousreply 137December 14, 2021 1:40 PM

GUYS AND TRANS

A transgender reimagining of Guys and Dolls

Featured songs:

A Bushel and a Dick

Adelaide's Labia

If I Were a Belle

I've Never Had a Muff Before

Take Back Your Dink

Snatch Shooters Ballet

Silicone Be a Lady

Sit Down, You're Rockin' the Tuck

by Anonymousreply 138December 14, 2021 1:42 PM

ANNIE Frank The Musical: 'Midnight Train to Auschwitz' , 'Gaslighted',

by Anonymousreply 139December 14, 2021 2:00 PM

"I Spread My Legs for My Father-in-Law and My Cunt Got Real Wet" - Lara Trump's one-woman show.

Features:

"Is It In Yet?"

"Really, It's In, You're Kidding Right?"

"Don't Feel a Thing (If It Ain't Got that Cockring)"

"If They Could See Me Now Oh Wait They Do You're Taping This"

by Anonymousreply 140December 14, 2021 2:06 PM

Meghan! A View From the Right.

Songs include:

"My Father" ("You Can't Kill Him Again")

"Whoopi's No Cushion"

"The Joy Sucks Club"

"Say (Yes to) Cheese"

by Anonymousreply 141December 14, 2021 2:33 PM

"Pizzagate: A Fable"- Hillary Clinton (Marissa Jaret Winokur) operates a kiddie porn smuggling operation out of the basement of a restaurant. Songs include "C'Mon Baby Eat My Pie"; "Lollipops"; "Killary Billary"; "You're Never Going Home Again". Bill Clinton: Harry Connick, Jr. Edgar Maddison Welch: Billy Gilman. Johnny Gosch: Clay Aiken. Huma Abedin: Idina Menzel.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 142December 14, 2021 2:37 PM

The idea of having sex with an octopus was featured in the Addams Family musical.

by Anonymousreply 143December 14, 2021 2:49 PM

"The boys in the band" but played by transwomen

by Anonymousreply 144December 14, 2021 3:32 PM

High-Riding Bitch: The Dolores Claiborne Story. Featuring such off-key classics as:

"Cheese and Crackers!"

"Has He Fucked Her? Gorry-Be!"

"I Killed for Her, and STILL She Pops the Pills!"

"There are Worse Things I Could Do (than kill an old lady)"

"Freedom in Maine is A Prison Itself!"

by Anonymousreply 145December 14, 2021 3:36 PM

Mengele: The Musical

Starring the Olsen Twins

by Anonymousreply 146December 14, 2021 3:47 PM

Slender Man: The Musical

This musical will combine two tragedies that took place in Waukesha, Wisconsin. In 2014, the Slender Man told two girls to attack and attempt to murder a friend of theirs. In 2021, Slender Man returns to Waukesha and causes a man to drive a vehicle through a Christmas parade.

Songs include "The Slender Ender," "Friends Don't Kill Friends," and "The March Towards Death."

by Anonymousreply 147December 14, 2021 4:20 PM

Jared Kushner IS Slenderman

by Anonymousreply 148December 14, 2021 5:50 PM

Rust the musical with alec singing ,i did not shoot the sheriff but i shot the cameralady. Alec in a duo with meghan markle singing: nobody ASKED if we were okay !. Grand finally alec singing : acdc's dirty deeds done dirt cheap. Curtain lowers

by Anonymousreply 149December 14, 2021 7:17 PM

West Side Shove It Up Your Ass, the Michael Cohen Story, featuring the Bay City Rollers, Mr. Hair Gel, and A Cast of Trashy Lawyers (sure to make you smile, free ambulance ride with every show)

by Anonymousreply 150December 14, 2021 7:41 PM

Light My Grease Fire

starring DL fave, Greg

by Anonymousreply 151December 14, 2021 8:14 PM

Bo Sinn is Duke Vincentio (and Lodowick) in the all-nude production of Shakespeare's Made For Measure, set to music by David Byrne and Bjork. Celine Dion as Mistress Overdone, Viennese brothel madame. Performed in nasally Quebecois French.

by Anonymousreply 152December 14, 2021 9:16 PM

Mary Tyler Moore sings your favorites from Ordinary! Including “Happy”, “You Can’t Save French Toast!”, “Like Something Out of Dickens” and “Buck Never Would Have”. Order now and we will throw in a bonus of the Next to Normal cast recording.

by Anonymousreply 153December 15, 2021 12:21 AM

I WAS MOLESTED Lorna Luft’s triumphant return to the Broadway stage!

Lorna/Liza “I was molested/I don’t care”

Lorna/Joey Luft “I was molested/I like blue”

Lorna/Judy Davis (as Judy Garland) “I was molested/happy days are here again”

by Anonymousreply 154December 15, 2021 12:43 AM

"Roxane!", a gender twist on Cyrano with DL fave Roxane Gay secretly advising a cis white conventionally proportioned lesbian on what to say to another woman.

The 11 o'clock number, "Hunger," rhymes the lines "big old phony" with "taste your yoni."

Visiting school groups, which got tickets in a package with "Mrs. Doubtfire" and "To Kill a Mockingbird," will return to Maryland VERY confused.

by Anonymousreply 155December 15, 2021 12:45 AM

An update to Chicago called Shriners! It skewers victim celebrity, with Alec and Kaleb competing to receive the most operations from renowned Shriners surgeons. The boys, with thier brittle bone disease, dazzle while singing And All That Smash. The dance numbers are weak, however.

by Anonymousreply 156December 15, 2021 1:10 AM

"Gary Talked Her Out of It!", a musical revue where Lucille Ball fantasized about what could have been. "The Manchurian Candidate' is re-tooled with songs, and she flashes her tits as Mrs. Robinson. The big climax number has Lucy in a musical sequence from 'Sophie!" with a song called "My children, my choice".

by Anonymousreply 157December 15, 2021 1:49 AM

Andrew Lloyd Webber's "The Messhie Pusshie", a heartwarming story of life in small-town Hudson, New York, London, Paris, Bhopal and other locations. Features the songs "Happiness is a Lump of Ziploc Cake"; "Help, My Cat is Stuck Behind the Fridge"; "Feeding My Soul with the Theah-treh"; and the big dance number, to the tune of "I Wanna be Loved by You", "I Need to Get Fucked Right Now" done by the entire cast in the nude.

by Anonymousreply 158December 15, 2021 2:02 AM

[quote]Mary Tyler Moore sings your favorites from Ordinary! Including “Happy”, “You Can’t Save French Toast!”, “Like Something Out of Dickens” and “Buck Never Would Have”. Order now and we will throw in a bonus of the Next to Normal cast recording.

You forgot "Of Course His Doctor Is a Jew (But I'm going to Pretend I Hadn't Noticed)"

And "I Resent Having to Re-grout the Bathroom for HIM"

by Anonymousreply 159December 15, 2021 5:28 AM

"The Blue Musical"- Joey Luft (Jason Alexander) tries to get on Public Assistance in West Hollywood. Liza/Judy: Mario Cantone. Lorna: Jane Krakowski. Social Worker: Fantasia.

by Anonymousreply 160December 15, 2021 5:28 AM

"Producers! The Therapy Musical". A raucous romp through the minds of Harvey Weinstein and Scott Rudin as they deal with the ramifications of their take down. Visions of their victims pop in their head through nightmares and therapy sessions, resulting in a song and dance extravaganza that will have you outrageously tapping and humming along. The big moment comes when Scott Rudin dreams through a ballet number that he's being stoned by having coffee mugs thrown at him.

by Anonymousreply 161December 15, 2021 10:18 AM

"Armie Hammer, Cannibal"

The story of how one man pursues a career in Hollywood while hoping the world doesn't learn his big secret; he has a twisted mind and is into any number of sordid things, specifically cannibalism. Featuring his own take on "Montero (Call Me By Your Name" by Lil Nas X as a reference to his most famous movie role. "Call me by your name, and then I can taste you in private. Call me by your name, I need your flesh in my diet."

by Anonymousreply 162December 15, 2021 2:00 PM

Gladiator 2022!

Featuring fat Russell Crowe as Maximus AteTooMuchCakeymus Meridius.

Commodus is played by Rege-Jean Page, the mulatto son of Marcus Aurelius who couldnt get enough of that African snatch.

The lions and tigers in the gladiator arena battles will be played by transmen on their periods.

by Anonymousreply 163December 15, 2021 2:20 PM

SISSY TODD: THE DEMON HAIRDRESSER OF CASTRO STREET

The final musical written by Stephen Sondheim (although his estate will only allow it to be produced under his pseudonym Hymie Shaftheim.)

It is the story of Sissy, a flamboyant male hairdresser who arrives in San Francisco in 1976, hellbent on styling the hair of the city's richest (and bitchiest) women while murdering random gay tricks and tawdry street hustlers.

ACT ONE

"Fasten Your Seatbelts, We're Gonna Do The Bump (And Ride You All Night)" - Chorus

"I Hope They Like Me At Le Salon" - Sissy

“Do You Know Who I Am?/I Am This Town” - Winnie Crenshaw-Ford

"Polishing Every Knob (On Nob Hill)" - Sissy

"Wash & Rinse/If He Loved Me" - Latimore

"Whore Made Me Pay/He'll Pay" - Sissy

"Hot On His Tail" – Chorus

“Glory Hole Tango” – Sissy & Cast

“I’ll Clean Up His Mess” – Latimore

"If It's The Last Thing I Do, I'll Find That Killer Fag" - Detective Marconi

“I Hope They Like Me – reprise” Sissy

ACT TWO

"It Takes A Fag To Tease It Right" - Winnie Crenshaw-Ford & The Ladies Who Lunch

"69in' a 49er (And Nothin' Could Be Finer)" – Sissy

“Locker Room Bloodbath Boogie” – Chorus

“It’s Not Too Late For Us/You’re Too Big For This Town” – Latimore

"I Cum, You Bleed" - Sissy

“The Killer Fag Is Slipping (On His Own Blood)” – Detective Marconi

"It Takes A Fag To Tease It Right - reprise" – Sissy

“To The Docks!” – Chorus

“Shag, Marry, Kill” – Sissy

“He’s Not A Monster/If He Loved Me - reprise” – Latimore

“Cable Car Requiem” – Chorus

“I Hope They Like Me (In Hell)” – Sissy

by Anonymousreply 164December 15, 2021 2:40 PM

An update to Mengele: The Musical

Songs include "This Way to the Gas, Guys and Dolls," "Sophie's Choice," "Dancing in the Zion Hotel," and "Rhyming Simons."

Group rate for Nanas!

by Anonymousreply 165December 15, 2021 3:41 PM

R160, will Joey sing "Am I Blue?"

by Anonymousreply 166December 15, 2021 5:33 PM

I Did My Own Research: The Aaron Rodgers Musical

by Anonymousreply 167December 15, 2021 5:34 PM

"Whipple Down the Wind"

by Anonymousreply 168December 15, 2021 5:52 PM

[quote] Light My Grease Fire - starring DL fave, Greg

I like it!

by Anonymousreply 169December 15, 2021 8:15 PM

No Daddy Bad Touch

A jukebox musical where characters representing Lorna Luft, JonBenet Ramsey and Anthony Rapp, among others, sing about their challenges.

Songs include "Touch Me In The Morning (Then Just Walk Away)" "Baby It's Cold Outside" "Wrapped Around Your Finger" and the 11 oclock number, Joey Luft singing Joni Mitchell's "Blue." (Literally, the word blue, it's the only lyric he remembers.)

by Anonymousreply 170December 15, 2021 8:19 PM

Damn it, somehow I missed R166. Apologies.

by Anonymousreply 171December 15, 2021 8:19 PM

Marge: Portrait of a Middle-Aged BBW Hooker

We really needed to repair the car, and they cut back my hours at Walmart

"Chrissy M. Is a Role-Model for Us All"

"I Wanted to do Mukbank Videos But We Lost Our Intenet"

by Anonymousreply 172December 15, 2021 9:42 PM

Gunning For America: The Lauren Boebert Musical. Starring Laura Osnes as Lauren Boebert

by Anonymousreply 173December 15, 2021 9:55 PM

My Little Margie: The Marjorie Taylor Greene Musical. With Kristen Chenoweth as Marge

by Anonymousreply 174December 15, 2021 10:06 PM

....

by Anonymousreply 175December 16, 2021 8:45 PM

Brigacoon!

An all-black re-imagining of Brigadoon with an all-rap score, a troupe of twerk dancers, and Hair-era nudity featuring a hung cast of black male ex-cons.

The one traditional ballad, "The Heather on My Azz" will be sung by Adam Lambert (in black face.)

by Anonymousreply 176December 16, 2021 9:01 PM

FARTS! The Musical

Brought to you by Michael Lucas and Lucas Entertainment

Produced by Michael Lucas

Directed by Michael Lucas

Book by Michael Lucas

Music and Lyrics by Michael Lucas

Starring Michael Lucas

Based on the film produced, directed, and written by Michael Lucas

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 177December 17, 2021 12:30 AM

↑ But did he do his own wardrobe?

I could fart and get credited for "everything" on my movies

by Anonymousreply 178December 17, 2021 9:34 AM

[quote] "Propellers: The Lauren Scruggs Story,"

R105 Does it feature a show stopping number that her good Christian husband Mr. Jason Kennedy can star in? Perhaps "I'm Gonna Wash That Queer Right Out Of My Hair"...

by Anonymousreply 179December 17, 2021 11:11 AM

R179 You shut up! I'm 100% heterosexual and horny for pussy!

by Anonymousreply 180December 17, 2021 11:23 AM

I saw a TikTok that said one of those Dance Mom type shows had young girls doing an interpretive dance with a school shooting theme, so that’s a really horrendous conceit for a Broadway show. Though to think of it “I Don’t Like Mondays” could be a great end to the first act and really bring the curtain down with a bang!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 181December 17, 2021 11:34 AM

PURE SHIT: The Gym Jordan Musical

In this country music non-narrative look at Gym Jordan, Act I takes place in the locker room of the Ohio State Men's Wrestling Team. There is lots of skin and lots of steam and lots of illicit sex on stage.

Act 2 takes place in the locker room of the men's gym in the US Congress. There is lots of skin and lots of steam and lots of illicit sex on stage.

Act 3 takes place in the locker room of a federal prison. Which one is yet to decided. There is lots of skin and lots of steam and lots of illicit sex on stage.

Johnny Rapid has been signed to play Gym Jordan. The 'greek' chorus men play the OSU wrestlers, Congress members, and federal prisoners. The score won't be a problem for those whores on Broadway. Just say that this is being produced and someone will write it.

by Anonymousreply 182December 17, 2021 11:48 AM

Maybe not as sensitive but certainly something that would infuriate ticket buyers. Going to see Hamilton the musical and discovering that the subject matter is quite different than what they expected.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 183December 17, 2021 12:36 PM

Offensive, not sensitive. Tired of Android keyboards that change random words after you proof read and hit post.

by Anonymousreply 184December 17, 2021 12:40 PM

Once again the Greeks are ahead of their time:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 185December 17, 2021 3:22 PM

Here is the first photo of Johnny Rapid in his role as Young Gym Jordan.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 186December 17, 2021 6:36 PM

"Bruce Again!" - A raunchy musical about the life, loves, and buffets of famed comedy writer Bruce Vilanch.

With such hits as: "I Flashed Donny Osmond," "Another Broken Barstool," and "Hollywood Squares? Who Cares?"

by Anonymousreply 187December 17, 2021 6:55 PM

Rioter on the capital roof!

A January 6th musical extravaganza.

Featuring: Ansel Elgort as the shaman and Chris Hemsworth as the Lectern man.

by Anonymousreply 188December 17, 2021 8:08 PM

If you liked "Broadway Joe" Namath, you'll love Broadway Aaron Rodgers in Thoughts and Prayers: the Covid Musical!

by Anonymousreply 189December 17, 2021 8:17 PM

"Implants XXL" - a musical about a young woman who gets dumped by a hot guy, so she decides to get breast implants. There's a song about how hot the guy is, a song about how the guy loves huge tits (sung by the guy), a song about how large she wants to get them, a song about the surgery (sung by the doctor), a song about accepting herself for what she is, and then a song about how great her life is after she gets the implants (she decides to get them anyway).

by Anonymousreply 190December 17, 2021 8:19 PM

"They/Them" - a musical about a young man going through his process of deciding what his new gender pronouns will be. There's an entire lavish number about "Xe/Xir", a number where he is suicidal after being misgendered, a song about cancellation (he cancels the woman who misgendered him and takes her job), a song about updating his Twitter profile with the new pronouns, a song about Gender Euphoria caused by people using the new pronouns, and in the end he decides to just stick with "they/them", in the finale wrap-up number.

by Anonymousreply 191December 17, 2021 8:23 PM

The Full Monty 2021 starring Caitlyn Jenner.

Including Tony Award winning song “Pole or Hole?” and a special guest appearance by Kanye West performing “I Don’t Know How to Love Kim”. Eventually the play is all about Kanye. Poor Cait.

by Anonymousreply 192December 18, 2021 3:55 AM

Black Box - Tilda Swinton mostly invisible in a series of black boxes on stage representing famous embalmed and mummified corpses - Lenin, TUTANKHAMUN, Eva Peron - while the Princing Elites dramatise historical events. Music by Cerrone with Morcheeba and featuring Martha Wash.

by Anonymousreply 193December 18, 2021 4:13 AM

The next Ben Platt Broadway production.

by Anonymousreply 194December 18, 2021 7:07 AM

"10 Years A Sex Slave": Three young women (Lena Dunham, Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato) fight to survive locked in a house for a decade. Songs include: "Here He Cums Again"; "Knock Three Times For 'Yes'"; "Chick Fill A"; and "If I Ever Get Outta Here". The Dude: Mandy Patinkin.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 195December 18, 2021 3:11 PM

Lizsha the Musical. Starring Mario Cantone in the titular role. Featuring classics such as:

“All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth”

“Silver Bells”

And don’t miss the show-stopping performance of, “Georgia on my Mind”

by Anonymousreply 196December 18, 2021 3:32 PM

SLAMMED! A Texas Prison Romance! Featuring such toe-tappers as:

"Twenty-five to life - And what a life it's been!"

"Make it fit with mayo!"

"Stale Coffee and Stiff Cocks (the Warden's Lament)"

"Pruno Means No!"

"A Trusty Who Sure Weren't Rusty!"

by Anonymousreply 197December 18, 2021 5:49 PM

I said this in the theater thread, but it would work here too:

Sarah Brightman IS…Typhoid Mary!

by Anonymousreply 198December 19, 2021 1:29 PM

Nine/Eleven/Thirty Six

Ann Romano (Bonnie Franklin) experiences a midlife crisis on September11, 2001–her 36th birthday. Unable to enjoy the celebratory breakfast hosted by her family and friends at the Windows on the World restaurant in New York City, she heads to the ladies room where she ruminates on the hardship of aging women in modern society. Suddenly the lights go out and a tampon dispenser hits her on the head (dream sequence begins). An airplane crashes through the ladies room mirror. A group of scantily clad males (played by the Juul Haalmeyer Dancers) emerge, singing “We Got Annie!” while hoisting Ms. Romano on their shoulders. What follows is a joyous, life-affirming musical revue celebrating Annie’s remarkable beauty, talent and perky breasts. Towards the end, a loud BOOM is heard, ash falls from the sky, and the entire company (JH Dancers, Nanette Fabray, Pat Harrington, Glenn Scarpelli, Valerie Bertinelli, Shelley Fabares, Richard Masur and a coked-out Makenzie Phillips) join Valerie’s husband Eddie Van Halen on stage for their rousing rendition of “Jump.” Another loud boom is heard and the entire company disappears through the floor. The stage goes dark goes dark, then a spotlight shines on Annie, alone, on the floor of the ladies room, covered in dust. The resilient star of our show literally picks herself up, dusts herself off, and delivers her closing soliloquy in the song “Annie”s Turn.” After the last few choruses of “This time, for ME! For ME! ANNIE! ANNIE!” Ms. Romano falls through the floor, at peace that even though she’s going to die, she still looks hot!

by Anonymousreply 199December 19, 2021 3:31 PM

Pulse! The Orlando Musical - with 'This Joint is Jihad', 'Michael in the Bathroom about to Get Shot', and 'Ringing Phones on Empty Tables'

by Anonymousreply 200December 19, 2021 3:52 PM

Fisting: The Josh Hawley Story

The scenes on the yachts with Josh and the rich old poofs will shock audiences! Shock them I tell you!

The rousing closing number takes place on January 6, 2021 with Josh leading a chorus of Broadway's finest choir boys dressed as uneducated white trash marching and pumping their fists in the air to the title tune, "Fisting!". Double entendres abound.

Jake Gyllenhaal or Ryan Gosling for the lead.

by Anonymousreply 201December 19, 2021 4:11 PM

The contemplative ballad, "I Don't Know How to Love Her" set on Josh's wedding night (to his wife!) will bring the audience to tears.

by Anonymousreply 202December 19, 2021 4:17 PM

ISIS: A Love Story The Musical. There's an actual novel by this name btw.

by Anonymousreply 203December 19, 2021 4:19 PM

"We hate River City!". A group of theater Geeks, obsessed with Beetlejuice, storm the Winter Garden theater and take over the the stage on the opening preview of "The Music Man", and the two musicals intertwine as Meredith Wilson's lyrics for The Music Man are heard to the music from Beetlejuice, and vice versa.

by Anonymousreply 204December 19, 2021 5:04 PM

En Attendant Godage, a tragicomedy musical in two acts, starring the Weggleville Cum Dump as Estragon and Rafael Alencar as Vladimir. Music by Patrick Cowley.

by Anonymousreply 205December 19, 2021 5:30 PM

PULSE! The Tony Orlando Musical.

The life of Tony Orlando from his humble beginnings as a child in New York's Hell's Kitchen to the Brill Building to his own performing career to dabbling in the GOP, drug addiction, obesity, mental illness and his current gig as a Saturday night DJ hosting a radio Oldies show.

(Don't put any money in this that you can't afford to lose.)

by Anonymousreply 206December 19, 2021 5:32 PM

Woke!

Gay white woke mad scientists turn feminine gay children into transgender cretans!

by Anonymousreply 207December 19, 2021 5:39 PM

I'm thinking more of a casting choice that would make it most atrocious and offensive, rather than the plot and staging.

by Anonymousreply 208December 19, 2021 5:39 PM

MOHAMMAD: SUPER STAR!

Dead gay patrons of a shot up gay night club return from the dead to praise the Muslim who killed them.

by Anonymousreply 209December 19, 2021 5:41 PM

"Amber and Johnny in the Clair de Poo" - a night in bed with Johnny Depp, Amber Heard and a pile of shit.

Features the songs "Something Warm Between the Sheets"; "Put Some Clothes On you Broken-Down Pig"; "Finally, Something Stinks Worse Than Your Last Five Films".

by Anonymousreply 210December 19, 2021 5:55 PM

Confessions On A Bathroom Floor

A Madonna jukebox musical

Featuring reworkings of some of her classics: Where's The Potty, This Used To All Orange Groves, Take A Bowel Movement, Open Your Heart Surgery, Borderline Personality, I'll Barely Remember

by Anonymousreply 211December 19, 2021 6:23 PM

"SMEGMA: THE MUSICAL!"

Featuring the showstopper, "Stop! That Only LOOKS Like Cheese!"

by Anonymousreply 212December 19, 2021 6:35 PM

Mumia Mia!

Mumia Abu-Jamal in Song and Dance!

by Anonymousreply 213December 19, 2021 6:38 PM

I CAN COOK TOO

A new musical based on the life, loves and passions of Paula Dean.

ACT ONE

"That Pan Won't Grease Itself" - Grandma

"Big Girls Do Cry" - Paula (age 7)

"Yo Daddy Done Got Drunk...Again!" - Mama

"Lick The Frosting, Girl (It All Gon Be Alright)" - Grandma

"I Don’t Want No Hand Me Downs, Mama" - Paula (age 15)

"Sweet 16" - Chorus

"I'm Gonna Get Me A Blue Ribbon For Cookin' (At That Gosh Darn County Fair)" - Paula (age 17)

"Shotgun Wedding" - Papa

"Boy Child/You'll Never Leave Mama" - Paula (adult)

"Daddy's Dead, Jimmy's Drinkin' And I Just Can't Get Outta Bed" - Paula

"The South Will Rise Again" - Chorus

ACT TWO

"That Pan Won't Grease Itself - reprise" - Chorus

"The Day Yo Daddy Left" - Paula

"Boys, We're Goin' To Savannah!" - Paula

"Best Mama Ever" - Jamie and Bobby

"She Can Cook Too" - Food Network Scout

"Mama, You Gon Be A Star!" - Jamie and Bobby

"Everything's Better With A Little Bitta Butter" - Paula, Jamie and Bobby

"Nothin' Bad Can Happen Now" - Paula

"Mama Done Said The N-Word" Jamie and Bobby

"When You've Lost It All/Just A God Fearin' Woman" - Paula

"Lick The Frosting, Girl/It All Gon Be Alright - reprise" - Grandma's ghost

"Never Hungry Again" – Paula

"The South Will Rise Again - reprise" - Paula and Cast

by Anonymousreply 214December 19, 2021 8:59 PM

Stupid World, Stupid Songs: The Dayglo Abortions Jukebox Musical

featuring wall-to-wall showstopping classic hits, such as:

"Dogfarts"

"Sit on My Face and Bleed"

"I Killed Mommy"

"Fuck My Shit Stinks"

"Christina Bin Laden"

and, of course,

"My Erection"

starring Donny Osmond as legendary lead singer The Cretin

by Anonymousreply 215December 19, 2021 9:42 PM

I’m very late to this thread… I wanted to create something based on Joel… But after reading R29 I’m not sure I’ve got anything. R29 you need some time removed from society….

by Anonymousreply 216December 19, 2021 9:58 PM

Piper Saratoga, the Opera. Follow American political royalty JFK Jr and Carolyn Bessette in real time over the the fateful flight to the Kennedy Compound. Using magical realism, events from their lives are recreated when the planes front and rear structures fall alway in the fog of the night to reveal ravishing and horrifying set pieces, both intimate and vast in scale. Scores are settled, blowjobs are given, mysteries solved while new deeper conspiracies are planted. Music by David Byrne with Jonathan Dove. State designed by Jenny Holzer with Damien Hirst.

by Anonymousreply 217December 20, 2021 10:05 AM

Oooo, I actually kind of like R217's idea.

Add Laurie Anderson to the mix and stage it at BAM and you've got a hit on your hands, R217. It will play the major capitals of the world and in 20 years, be presented at the Met.

by Anonymousreply 218December 20, 2021 12:43 PM

"Fluidity"- A downlow LatinX playah thinks he has it all figured out- til one fateful day. Ricki Martin, Maluma, Zendaya, Chita Rivera. Songs include: "She Ain't Got What I Got"; "Full-Length Sable"; "Guilty Of Love- In The First Degree!"; "Stinkfish"; "Cut It Off".

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 219December 20, 2021 4:49 PM

"Loomered" - the Laura Loomer musical. Begins with Laura (played by herself) chaining herself to Twitter to get her account back.

Features: "Handcuffed for Freedumb!" "Oh No, I Gotta Pee" and "I'm an Ugly Skank Who Couldn't Get a Free Fuck in a Frankfurter Factory".

by Anonymousreply 220December 20, 2021 4:55 PM

[quote]I'll start with my idea: "TUBE: The Terri Schiavo Musical." It could open at the Burt Reynolds Dinner Theater in Florida, and cause a riot of bad reviews, followed by an actual riot.

OP, Family Guy already beat you to it.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 221December 20, 2021 5:52 PM

Danny Thomas: Mudslides and Hersey Kisses!

A erotic telling of the romantic adventures of America’s Favorite Dad!

Songs include: 1. A Glass Table for Two

2. Sex and the Shitty

3. Before She’s Too-liet

4. Beans, Burritos, and Bulimia

5. Let’s just Re-laxative

6. The Sweet Smell of Sulfur

7. When Did We Eat Corn?

by Anonymousreply 222December 24, 2021 5:21 AM

John Wayne Gacy's Follies: The body parts of several murdered boys reunite in a serial killer's crawl space.

Featuring Andy Dick in the titular role.

by Anonymousreply 223December 24, 2021 6:36 AM

[quote]John Wayne Gacy's Follies

We had to get to Follies eventually.

by Anonymousreply 224December 24, 2021 7:08 AM

Cats

by Anonymousreply 225December 24, 2021 8:15 AM

Mommie Deadliest: The JonBenet Ramsey Story

by Anonymousreply 226December 24, 2021 8:20 AM

If I Did It: The Opera (Libretto by OJ Simpson)

by Anonymousreply 227December 24, 2021 8:25 AM

Evita II

It's the fictional story of Austria after World War II when they start arriving, and Hitler and Eva Braun has escaped. Eva P. takes Eva B. under her wing and shows her the ropes. Hitler plots to overthrow Peron, but his plans fail and Peron dresses him up in drag, put him in the main square in Buenos Aires, and has him tortured to death.

by Anonymousreply 228December 24, 2021 10:49 AM

You could use O.J's own words for "The Night In Question", the 11 o'clock number from "If I Did It", R227.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 229December 24, 2021 5:09 PM

I don't have a title but I have an idea. We all know that Ivanka and Melania are bitter enemies, fueled by jealousy and ambition. That all changes when Donald Trump is injured in an accident. In spite of his crass persona, Trump is actually one of the nation's leading philanthropists. During a turkey giveaway in rural Mississippi, Trump is stabbed by a deranged BLM adherent. As Trump convalesces away from the public eye, Ivanka and Melania are forced to set aside their differences for the good of the family, and the country. It's Evita meets A Christmas Carol.

by Anonymousreply 230December 24, 2021 5:18 PM

Uhhhh... I only like the part where Trump get stabbed.

Does he survive the attack? Because I would not pay to see that.

by Anonymousreply 231December 24, 2021 9:06 PM

I Can’t Breathe: George Floyd the Musical

by Anonymousreply 232December 24, 2021 11:27 PM

Todesengel - a sung-through musical about Mengele at Auschwitz

by Anonymousreply 233December 24, 2021 11:59 PM

LETS DROP THIS WINDOWPAYNE ACID BY ONE OF THE KENNEDY BOYS . First number: i am seeing lots of colors how bout u babe ? Second number : i AM driving you home Third number : man this crazy bridge sure is small Fourth number : what a. I doing sitting upside down in3 ft of water Fifth and final number: everyman (or woman ) for themselves, see ya.

by Anonymousreply 234December 25, 2021 1:35 AM

Terry Miller: The Joy of Fisting

Baby You Can Drive Your Car...Into My Big Hole

Honey,, There's an Echo in Here

And the Crowd Pleasing Finale - Vaginal Rejuvenation Really Works - I'm Young Again!

by Anonymousreply 235December 25, 2021 7:56 AM

↑ If Terry Won't Cooperate

let him know that we can replace him with Lens Dunham

and we won't have to change a thing

by Anonymousreply 236December 25, 2021 8:02 AM

GLINDA: SLUT OF OZ

An exploitation musical inspired by The Wizard of Oz universe.

ACT ONE

Setting: A munchkin dive bar on the outskirts of Oz, one month after Dorothy finds her way back to Kansas in a hot air balloon.

A munchkin barmaid named Schotzie pours Glinda a whiskey, neat. It is not Glinda's first drink of the day. It is 11AM.

Glinda steadies herself on her barstool and tells her story to anyone willing to listen.

"Buy A Girl A Drink" - Glinda

"There's A Midget In My Pocket (And He's Happy To See Me)" - Glinda

"I'll Huff And I'll Puff (Till You Blow My House Down)" - Male Munchkin #1

"Lollipop Shuffle" - Munchkin chorus

"Bitch Got A Crown (It Don't Make Her Special)" – Raynetta (prostitute Munchkin)

“Glinda's Shit Don't Stink" - Glinda

"They Might Be Small, But They're Big (If You Know What I Mean)" - Schotzie

"2 Is Good, 3 Is Better/Let's Move This Party To My Room" - Glinda

"Lollipop Shuffle - reprise" - Munchkin chorus

"Bitch Got A Crown (It Don't Make Her Special)/"I'll Huff And I'll Puff (Till I Take That Witch Down)"" – Raynetta

ACT TWO

Setting: Glinda's room in a fleabag hotel on the outskirts of Oz. Midnight.

Glinda wakes up in bed. She wears a stained négligée. Two naked male Munchkins sleep fitfully on either side of her.

"Flying Monkeys (The Voices In My Head)" – Glinda

The Munchkins wake up and shoot heroin with Glinda.

“Poppy Fields Forever” - Male Munchkins #1 & #2

The Tin Man peers at them from outside through a dirty window.

“Peeping Tom/Grease Me Up” – The Tin Man

"They Might Be Small, But They're Big (If You Know What I Mean) - reprise" – Glinda

The Tin Man breaks through the window and kills both Munchkins with a tight chokehold.

The Tin Man then screws on a large metal dildo to his groin.

"2 Is Good, 9 Is Better” – The Tin Man

The Tin Man roughly mounts Glinda.

“Flying Monkeys/I Want To Go To This Place Called Kansas” – Glinda

While The Tin Man continues to penetrate Glinda, Raynetta enters. She holds a gun.

“Buy A Girl A Drink – reprise/I’ma Be The Queen” – Raynetta

Raynetta shoots Glinda. It is a bloody mess.

Glinda, on the verge of death, musters the energy to sing one more song.

“I’ll See You In Hell (Wearin’ A Pair Of Ruby Slippers)” – Glinda

Glinda chokes on her own blood and dies.

Raynetta takes a large piece of jagged glass from the broken window, slits her throat, and dies, spraying The Tin Man with blood.

The blood instantly turns to rust, killing The Tin Man.

Schotzie enters with a bucket of sudsy water and a mop and begins to clean up the mess.

An instrumental version of "Lollipop Shuffle” plays as the curtain comes down.

by Anonymousreply 237January 12, 2022 3:49 PM
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