Lardos thread 17 - Butterballs Niall, Lewis, Gemma and Niko

I am a Larry shipper, a Larry believer if you will.

R2, why would clean living health nut Harry Styles be dating stinking Louis Tomlinson, who smokes 60 a day and is an alcoholic, like Niall and Liam? Please be sensible.

R2, are you new here?

Niall is definitely an alcoholic.

Nope, I started the first Fat Niall thread and introduced everyone to Gemma's blog. I detest Larries because they link Harry to an ugly motherfucker who lives to smoke cigarettes and drink cheap beer.

Thanks for that R5! The Fat Niall threads are hilarious! And it is even funnier now that there are FOUR hopeless fatties we can laugh at. I am glad you found Gemma’s blog and introduced it here. She is out of her mind.

Who is Fat Niko?

R7, Fat Niko is the lead singer of a Finnish band called Blind Channel. They sing in English. He's gross with a double chin and long, greasy hair.

Do you have a picture of Fat Niko? Is he actually fat or does he just have a double chin?

FAT NIKO on the right. Mr Grease.

Ewwww! His hair is so greasy! And he looks overweight. The other guy is kinda cute and looks miles better than Fat Niko aka Mr. Grease. That’s a perfect name for him too.

R10 Thanks for your answer! Fat Niko’s hair looks greasy in that pic. He is a bit fat then?

Fat Greasy Niko has a huge wobbly beer gut and looks a mess for a guy of only 22. Even Niall looked fine at that age.

Even a huge beer gut? At the age of 22! Should I feel bad for him? Body already ruined at that age…

Does Hogran smoke too? Or is it just food and booze killing him?

Hogran has been papped smoking but tries to keep it a secret.

Hogran shouldn't be ashamed of adding another vice to his repotoire.

R14 No, you shouldn’t feel bad for him! He ruined his body himself. He decided to shove all that greasy food in his mouth.

Hogran probably smokes. Maybe not regularly but I think he does. Maybe when he is partying?

Niko probably smokes too. He looks like he does.

Isn't Hogran on one continuous party? Probably smokes a pack a day.

Hogran is so disgusting! Smokes. And drinks so much alcohol. And eats junk food only.

Same goes for Fat Niko. I think he smokes a lot. Niko also looks like he reeks of some musty fast food place.

Does Gemma smoke? She is probably really smelly too! Ew!

Grease Boy Niko definitely smokes - all those emo types do.

Greasy Fat Niko 100% smokes! He looks stinky and it’s clear that he smokes. His double chin and lardy body make me feel sick.

He looked more innocent a few years ago. He already had full, round, doughy face back in the day. And he has put on a lot of weight since these pictures.

Gemma wrote this about a food shopping trip with her FATMATES. They bought so much grub that they couldn't carry it all. TWO hours loading up on dozens of pizzas, pies and litre tubs of ice cream:

why do 2 hour food shopping trip to buy groceries and carry all of it home walking ? would not recommend . we did this yesterday and my shoulders are never going to recover

TWO HOURS!!! That household is full of nasty pigs. Gemma is so greedy she had to buy more gross and fattening food that she can carry. She definitely bought pizzas, pies and massive tubs of ice cream, like R24. But she definitely also bought cookies, chocolate, crisps and other unhealthy items like sugary cereal. And gallons of coca cola, or other full fat fizzy drink.

It is incredible to me that they spent two hours loading up those trolleys with food. What a greedy fatty Gemma is.

Does Hogran like drugs too? 🤔

Food is his drug. He is addicted. A food addict and an alcoholic.

I love how you call them her FATMATES. 😂 Tells everything you need to know.

Does Hograns girlfriend make him get naked only once under the duvet?

Yeah probably. Who would like to see his wobbly beer belly and manboobs wobbling? She hates to see his lard so will tell him to keep his clothes on if he doesn’t have the duvet covering his body.

Gemma is going on a ‘party cruise’ to see Blind Channel and Fat Niko. She said ‘Everyone is going to get so drunk’. She is unbelievable!

Poor Amelia, having that sweaty lump pawing her when she's so slender and cute. I guess she closes her eyes and thinks of his $70m net wealth.

Alcoholic Gemma is so excited about this awful 22 hour cruise in Finland through the icy winter seas. Sounds like she plans to be blind drunk the whole time, probably on cheap vodka and beer. Blind Channel will be wasted too and barely able to perform.

Let's hope these hopeless obese reprobates experience high seas and are hit by a storm and all start vomiting .

Gemma wrote more about her supermarket trips. Blubber girl likes to do a big shop AND top it up in the week!

it’s a few km, so it’s a bit of a walk but we like to walk it when the weather is nice and so on. normally it’s been alright but yeah we bought too many things this time . normally i would go for less but i like going to the bigger supermarkets to get more food in one go so i don’t have to go back too soon. i do additional food shops if i am missing some items throughout the week though.like a top up . then i would go to the near tesco’s or so ,but i prefer going to the big supermarkets ! wish i had a car for these trips ! 😂 still sore back and shoulders. will i ever recover ?

It’s going to be embarrassing for Blind Channel how drunk they’re going to get and can barely perform. Fat Niko is going to brag about how drunk he is.

And Gemma… She is going to get so drunk she can’t remember anything. Then eat pizzas and burgers to heal her hangover. I am a bit worried how excited she is.

So, you’re telling me that blubbery Gemma goes to the bigger supermarket EVERY WEEK to do a massive TWO HOUR shopping trip AND then she is also topping up her treat pantry multiple times during the week? She probably goes back for sweets and crisps and more ice cream and pastries!

And let’s not forget her takeaways she has a few times a week?! How much does this ”girl” eat? Quotation marks because she is more like a pig than a girl. How many takeaways does she have during the week? Has she ever mentioned?

Perhaps alcoholic Niall can't get it up, that's poor Amelia.

He probably can’t. Too much alcohol and junk food and it’s probably squashed between his legs and underbelly.

Was it very big to begin with?

No, tiny! Niall exudes small dick energy the way he's always boasting.

I'd imagine he's done a few lines with Zayn and Louis in the past.

He didn’t keep up with that, otherwise he’d be skinny!

Haha yep he's FAT.

Obese Gemma bought more tickets to see Blind Channel and Greasy Niko.

Fat Niko looks so big here. His belly is huge! i

She's going to see Lard Channel about five times! Even braving the frozen ocean on an icebreaker cruise whivh sounds really dangerous, especially as everyone will be wasted on 80% proof Finnish vodka.

Niall will be on the cruise, fag hanging out his mouth swigging 80% vodka.

They'll probably roast entire HOGS to feed everybody and keep them warm in the -20c temperatures.

BLIND DRUNK CHANNEL

LARD CHANNEL

BLIND CHUBBIES

Lol! I love those names. Lard Channel and Blind Chubbies are hilarious! She is obsessed with that band. Why does she want to see Fat Niko so many times?

They will definitely be roasting entire hogs for the audience, with some creamy and buttery sauce. Gemma will share one with Niko. They both would love that.

Niall would love to be there too. I can imagine how much of a mess that cruise is going to be. Everyone will be drunk and someone will probably fall into the freezing sea.

Anon: Do they serve nice meals on the Blind Channel cruise or is everyone just focused on the vodka?

Gemma: they do yeah . there are some restaurants or you can choose your own meals (don’t have to include any if you don’t want to though) so we booked a breakfast buffet for the morning so that’s nice . I mean we'll defo eat something before boarding and when we get back to Helsinki.

So meals before during and after the vodka cruise! Probably aiming to consume 20k calories in a 24 hour period.

Oh my butter balls Niall would be in his element, blind drunk and buffet food. At least if he fell in the sea he'd float with all his blubber.

We got paywalled again so here is our new thread!