Lots of discussion about white people not bathing going on, Roxane Gay is horrified!

Also:

Oh God. This cow again?

Why is she always so pissy? Isn’t her wife performing her wifely duties?

We wash tits, pits and slits, Roxy.

No more is needed.

I think it may have been from a recent interview where Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis said they don’t bathe every day. See the allusion to that at R3.

No, there have been recent articles about how white people don't wash their legs when they shower and people are horrified. I personally don't wash my legs unless they're dirty or sweaty but that's actually my motto for any skin that isn't pits, undertits, or full slit.

Roxanne in the tub.

I hope Roxane bathes TWICE a day, all those folds probably get crusty very quickly.

Even though she may be correct, Roxane really is a cunt.

As if ever post and reply she makes isn’t meant to convey her perceived superiority.

Well let's smell YOUR ass, Roxane.

On second thought...

That's a troll tweet. The very definition of a troll.

In r8 she's claiming that white people typically smell? Seriously?

Black Twitter was all up in arms about this the other day, so I'm assuming that this is what DL Favorite Roxane Gay was referring to in her subtweet.

that stupid idiot kristen bell saw how much press ashton kutcher and his wife got when she said she barely bathes her kids, so kristen said the same thing, except she ramped it up. She said she "WAITS FOR THE STINK" before she decides to bathe her kids. Her dumbass husband agreed with her

She is so desperate to become A list or to have A list friends she willingly humiliates her kids on a daily basis

They really have been going after Kristen Bell for that interview. This is one of the replies to a tweet sharing the story.

Do Africans bathe daily? Because when I was there it did not seem like many did.

Roxane clutches her pearls over being called ableist LOL.

Kristen Bell was joking. It was actually funny. In essence she was saying you don't need to wash them just because they are dirty, wait for them to stink.

Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell are the latest parents to join the bath time boycott.

On Tuesday, the couple sat down on The View and shared their take on the topic when it comes to their kids Lincoln, 8, and Delta, 6.

"We bathed our children every single night — prior to bed is like the routine," Shepard, 46, said. "And then somehow, they just started going to sleep on their own without the routine, and by George, we had to start saying, 'Hey, when's the last time you bathed them?'" Bell, 41, added "Yeah, we forget." Shepard followed up by noting that "sometimes five, six days" pass without his kids being washed but they don't smell.

Then Bell had to drop a truth bomb of her own: "Well, they do sometimes," she shared. "Once you catch a whiff, that's biology's way of letting you know you need to clean it up." Then the actress said she "lets Mother Nature take over and waits for the natural aroma."

- Kristin will do anything to get attention. Any type of interview that she does contains cutesy (mostly made up) stories about her kids. When she first had kids, she made a big deal out of wanting to pass a law where the paparazzi can't take pics of celeb's kids. No one gave a shit about her kids or cared what they look like. She doesn't want pics, but she has no problem, constantly telling humiliating things about them

I get where she's coming from. Black people have to be extra clean to prove racists wrong, these two white people are bragging about how filthy they are.

People in California don't wash their children because it's not eco-friendly to do so.

Everywhere there is not a (possibly policy-exacerbated) drought and eco activism as the norm, people wash their kids and themselves.

[quote] I am genuinely shocked by how rarely (some) white people bathe themselves and their children. And how comfortable they are discussing it. During a pandemic.

Change "white" to "black" in that tweet, and anyone would be rightly excoriated as a racist for posting that.

Does she realize how offensive that is? How are Ashton Kutchner and Mila Kunis representative of "(some) white people"?

She's a fucking bigot.

What R21 said

And her followers, “I’m white and I agree with you. Please like me, Ms. Gay”

[quote] "Do Africans bathe daily? Because when I was there it did not seem like many did."

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt, and assume this wasn't a racist post...

There are many nomadic indigenous tribes that have alternative methods of cleaning themselves (i.e. without water). Some use the smoke of specific plants & trees known for their antimicrobial properties, The Himba women of Namibia use dust (specifically: ground red ochre mixed with butter that is spread over the body to help keep them protected from the sun, while also keeping their skin clean & moist...while also using the previously mentioned smoke bathing method).

I bring up The Himba specifically, because they've always fascinated me, and I've seen quite a few documentaries on them. I don't love to see Namibia someday.

I would imagine that folks outside of these tribes use water regularly, like most folks in the world.

“my fellow white people”

🙄

Every time this subject is brought up, I think of the scene in My Fair Lady where Eliza is dragged kicking and screaming into a bathtub.

There’s more to it than just Roxanne trolling and being extra cunty for the sake of cuntiness: (it’s white people, she loves to judge white people and do it vaguely, letting commenters fill in where she leaves off. That’s her thing. Fine. Whatever.)

It’s actually true some white people, and probably Black people and Asians, too, don’t bathe their kids regularly and here’s when and why, and why no one should give a flying shit.

There’s an age where kids, mostly in the summer when strict routines slide, especially when the kids are in early elementary school, and definitely when they go for a swim every day, you don’t bathe them. They shower before getting in the pool if it’s at the club or at the neighbor’s pool (less so if you have your own pool) and they rinse off/wash off sunscreen and chlorine after swim, and you let it go.

There’s no nightly bathing/showering going on in upper middle class to rich white families homes with both pools and elementary aged kids. And lastly, until about 4th grade, maybe 5th, kids simply don’t get b.o. like older kids and adults. You know, that oniony b.o. funk? Little ones don’t get it. So unless they’re filthy and/or they have somewhere important to be, etc., that 2nd grader you see with his yoga mom at Whole Foods in July on summer break probably hasn’t had a proper bath in a few days. (But the mom probably has if she’s going out in public.)

Roxanne and her countless, rancid folds stuffed with more cheese and yeast than a calzone, can fuck right off because she’s trolling AND talking out of her fat ass.

^And yeah, I spelled Roxanne’s name wrong and I’ll continue to do so until I die.

I grew up in the 70s in a very poor white suburban household, and as a kid, I had a bath every Sunday night. Other than that, there might be a shower during the week maybe once if warranted - like playing in the mud or something.

When I turned 12, I got self-conscious about my hygiene and appearance, due to acne and sweat and pubic hair. I showered every damn morning before going to school, and I got up early to make sure I did.

R26 I grew up doing all those things you listed and my mother had our asses in a bath every single night. No excuses. It boggles the mind how black people would be howling if "white" in her post was switched with "black". Why doesnt she mention the putrid smell of hair oils during the Jerri Curl phase ? Get on a hot city bus during the 80s and your eyes would water from the smell of that pungent shit they used in their hair. Never mind the grease stains all around their collars ! There Roxanne,see how easy that is?

*I'd love to see Namibia someday

As we all know, even if one goes to bed hungry every night (due to poverty, neglect, etc) as long as you go to bed bathed, all is right with the world. Because a clean ass is everything!

Bathing isn't showering, right? Showering is bad by American standards now? American problems... Or is it just Twitter problems?

I've seen that thing about "white people, wash your legs," and it seems like a pathetic attempt to act superior. Why should I wash my legs if I'm already being inundated in the shower, with soap and shampoo from the rest of my body running down my legs and getting rinsed off thoroughly? Your legs don't sweat or produce oil (or hardly at all). What kind of rank legs do these people have that they think it's so crucial to scrub them?

R33, I think that the concern is more about dead skin on your legs, which can (and some would argue, should) be scrubbed off.

This is more a of a visible issue for black people (i.e. ashiness), so the issue gets punted back to white people.

[quote] There’s an age where kids, mostly in the summer when strict routines slide, especially when the kids are in early elementary school, and definitely when they go for a swim every day, you don’t bathe them. They shower before getting in the pool if it’s at the club or at the neighbor’s pool (less so if you have your own pool) and they rinse off/wash off sunscreen and chlorine after swim, and you let it go. There’s no nightly bathing/showering going on in upper middle class to rich white families homes with both pools and elementary aged kids. And lastly, until about 4th grade, maybe 5th, kids simply don’t get b.o. like older kids and adults. You know, that oniony b.o. funk? Little ones don’t get it. So unless they’re filthy and/or they have somewhere important to be, etc., that 2nd grader you see with his yoga mom at Whole Foods in July on summer break probably hasn’t had a proper bath in a few days. (But the mom probably has if she’s going out in public.)

You’re attempting to make poor hygiene reasonable and acceptable by claiming that affluent people don’t bathe. The only people who don’t bathe DAILY are the people who have poor hygiene, poor, middle class or affluent. At least poor people have an excuse. They may not have the resources. Going out into the public without bathing is disgusting. Getting into your bed, at night, without bathing, is disgusting. Just like you brush your teeth, hopefully at least twice a day. You need to thoroughly clean your body, all of it. If you don’t. Guess what. You have poor hygiene!

R29, I grew up in the 70’s and 80’s, but I was poor so no pool. I had to bathe most nights in the summer. And definitely during the school year.

No comment on reversing races. I know all about Jheri curls and I get your point, but that’s irrelevant to the current discussion, in my opinion.

Just so I am up-to-date, is Roxane shocked or is she shocked and exhausted?

Meh - people used to have one bath a week just a few decades ago.

Kids don't need to bathe daily. What parent does that? That's bullshit.

R35, I’m talking about kids of a certain age not bathing. I’m not talking about adults. Im not talking about teenagers. And no one said anything about brushing teeth. That’s a HUGE priority among the upper class of all ages. You know what else is a huge priority among the upper class? Literacy. But you wouldn’t know anything about that, dear.

[quote] [R33], I think that the concern is more about dead skin on your legs, which can (and some would argue, should) be scrubbed off. This is more a of a visible issue for black people (i.e. ashiness), so the issue gets punted back to white people.

Bacteria is the “concern.” Just as it is with the rest of your body.

[quote] I personally don't wash my legs unless they're dirty or sweaty but that's actually my motto for any skin that isn't pits, undertits, or full slit.

Bacteria covers your entire body. You bathe to remove bad bacteria. You have poor hygiene. Which is not surprising. Many Dataloungers seem to have poor hygiene.

I don't know her.

I agree R38.

I think this all blew up because of stupid Ashton & Mila. That's fine if they have a policy about their young kids, and it's one that most parents actually agree with. But they took it a step further and talked about how THEY also don't bathe much, so now we get to envision these famous adults' naughty bits reeking of pee and other bodily fluids all day and every day. THAT is what is going on here, that pretty much any reasonable adult is mortified by this.

This Roxane bitch is making this about race. Black people have classically felt pressured to be clean as a whistle to skirt criticism from white people, and this is very true. But Roxane's not addressing THAT at all, she's just scoring internet points for being racist against whites in general.

Also, and I hope this doesn't give delicate Roxanne a stroke, I pee while I shower if I need to.

R40, you have bacteria all over your body, whether you bathe or not. The bacteria issue is only critical when you have a cut, or in any general area where there is hair.

I can relate.

There is an emotional/spiritual aspect of feeling and smelling clean.

R40, you do know about over-bathing, right? Bacteria is important to keep your skin balanced and to prepare to fight infections. There is reason to avoid washing 'too much' or else you remove that protection. This is a medical fact.

[quote] We wash tits, pits and slits, Roxy. No more is needed.

Is the coin slot included too?

[quote] [R35], I’m talking about kids of a certain age not bathing. I’m not talking about adults. Im not talking about teenagers. And no one said anything about brushing teeth. That’s a HUGE priority among the upper class of all ages. You know what else is a huge priority among the upper class? Literacy. But you wouldn’t know anything about that, dear.

1. You’re promoting poor hygiene and attempting to justify it with delusional anecdotes about swimming pools and what you believe affluent people do.

2. As I stated before. Bathing your body regularly is equally as important as brushing your teeth regularly. Age does not matter. Young children play outdoors. They get into God knows what. Children make messes indoors and outdoors. They also have the same most basic bodily functions as adults. They may or may not clean themselves properly in the restroom. Bathing regularly is equally as important as brushing your teeth.

3. I will just ignore your ad hominem attacks. I understand you’re angry. However, not bathing regularly = poor hygiene. No anecdote about the “upper class” is going to change that.

She needs to visit her local skid row before casting stones.

[quote] [R40], you do know about over-bathing, right? Bacteria is important to keep your skin balanced and to prepare to fight infections. There is reason to avoid washing 'too much' or else you remove that protection. This is a medical fact.

I believe my post actually mentioned “good bacteria.” Therefore it’s pretty obvious that I’m aware that our bodies need some bacteria. However, you also need to bathe regularly. “Good bacteria” is not an excuse to be a lazy filthy slob.

[quote] She needs to visit her local skid row before casting stones.

You believe that people, not having the resources to properly care for their bodies, justifies you having the resources, but somehow choosing not to use them. You don’t bathe regularly, because homeless people can’t. Is that some form of protest?

Everyone smells of something. I smell of fresh linen.

This Gay person must have its own particular odor preference.

Wow, this got crazy.

R.Chick, I don't think I've ever peed in the shower but my husband says he does it.

No, kids don't need to bathe every night until they're pre-teens or teens. The person who said they don't get stinky like adults is correct. I think that must be someone of a class thing. Some people who are afraid of coming off as lower class won't admit to not bathing their kids every night. I don't care about that, and can admit to not bathing my kids every night when they were younger.

To the person who asked about showers vs. baths: They are pretty much equal. Most people shower and consider that bathing. Some of us like to bathe in the tub, but a lot of people are skeeved out by that (they say eww, you're sitting in your own filth!). I wash my legs because I soap them up to shave them, but I know a lot of people don't do that every day, or ever. I would assume that legs would kind of get clean no matter what (like the guy upthread said).

What exactly is her problem?

It’s always appreciated when a PhD weighs in with a word salad.

I don’t have a clue, R55

I had an uncle who bathed twice a year. If that. He died when I was a teenager, so I'm not sure exactly what it was, but he had a skin condition and you could just watch him move and watch the skin cells falling off like snow. That's why he never bathed, my father said. His skin would dry out even worse. So I wish Ms. Gay wouldn't be so quick to judge. But her ilk always enjoy making themselves feel better by criticizing things without all the facts.

R49, you can keep making lists directed at me, but you’re not understanding what I said, at all. And what I said is not complicated or convoluted. It’s pretty straightforward.

Do better, mkay? You don’t want to end up like Mz. Gay, do you?

Wash yo damn nuts.

Really, lady? You're 800 lbs. You sweat just moving from one room in your house to another. You HAVE to bathe constantly and you still smell.

Black twitter being racist. Just a typical Thursday…

Roxeanne said that in response to Ashton and Kristin Belle not bathing their kids? OK, I guess all non-black people should assume all black adults raise their parents the same way T.I. raised his daughter then.

Ride the NYC subway in August. The nonbathers aren’t just “whypyo.” Sorry. I know it’s extremely popular in this dumbed down culture to make sweeping generalizations based on skin color, but alas, life is more complicated, nuanced and varied for that.

Maybe we should ALSO look at….economics?

I find this post very triggering. We did not have a hot water tank growing up, so all my bathing was done in a metal tub with kettles of how water. For that reason, I bathed once a week, regardless of the season. Not only is this post racist, it is also classist and ableist. I am exhausted from having to explain this to people.

Jesus R65 ,when did you grow up ? the 1930s ?

You just know Roxane stinks like most morbidly obese people do. She likely cannot wipe properly between her folds of fat, and probably also can't wipe herself "down there" properly.

Looking for the perfect gift to send dear ol' (obese) Roxane?

I don't understand Roxane making a stupid comment like this.

A) She's half white.

B) Her wife is white.

What a bitch.

I wonder when the wife is going to say "Enough is enough," and dump her ass.

Born in 1980, r66.

Didn't Roxane hint just a few weeks ago, that she was "exhausted" with fighting on social media, and that she would be leaving it?

I guess that didn't last very long.

R70 where honey ,Appalachia ? Im not being judgey,but I just dont understand how that could happen.

As a black person who has dated many white guys, we had some different showering rituals, but it was never about the amount of showering. For instance, I like a washcloth and one of those things your use with body wash. Every white guy, that I've seen, uses their hands. The whole leg thing that black twitter goes on about, that must be some kind of class thing and not a race thing. Because, I think, half of showering is about gravity. I don't know why you need to specially focus on your legs.

And white guys have no problems sharing toothbrushes. That took me a minute, but now I'm fine with it too.

Here's the bottom line:

When showering, wash EVERY PART OF YOUR BODY.

Simple, right?

It means that you get the dirt, grime, and germs off of yourself COMPLETELY.

This is basic hygiene.

R73 if anybody put my toothbrush in their mouth I would freak ! Not even my lovers could do that. Sorry,some things are sacrosanct !

The UK only has compulsory metered water on houses built after around 1990.

The rest of us pay a flat fee or around £10 ($13) a week or less for unlimited water usage (differs across the Country).

It was established in that way over 150 years ago to encourage cleanliness.

[quote] if anybody put my toothbrush in their mouth I would freak

And yet, the dozens and dozens and dozens of guys you’ve rimmed before fucking them doesn’t bother you. Interesting. :)

She is making this about oppression? What a clown world.

It happens for other reasons too. Like a parent spending the gas/electric money on beer so boiling water added to the cold in the tub is the only hot water you're going to have. uh, I have heard.

Ya it’s so funny to me the toothbrush thing. People will literally put dead animals in their mouths, drink cows milk, rim someone and then scream if you use their toothbrush lol.

Second note, you bores going on about class, it doesn’t exist any more. Discussion of class (upper class / middle / lower) is over. Stop associating levels of society with wealth. So retro and embarrassing, but mostly desperate, it says so much about you, and what it says is not cute.

I say this almost every day on this site, but STINK IS SEXY.

As long as the stinking person is HOT.

Feet, balls, maybe even ass (though I won’t lick the ass if it stinks). I prefer dirt and musk over Irish Spring and cologne. Fuck outta here with that perfume.

She is legend that woman!

I am genuinely shocked by how badly (some) black people smell despite bathing themselves and their children. And how comforting that we lose our sense of smell during the pandemic.

You can lead a whore to water but you cannot stop her stink.

R83 Dietary differences also play a role rather than ethnicity..

I can smell Chinese people from 20ft away as I'm allergic to most South-East Asian food (mainly MSG and sesame oil).

It doesn't mean they smell bad, it's just that I can smell them.

Wait . . . is Roxanne male or female?

What am I? Chopped Vindafoo?

I think it may be comforting to pretend that all white people don't bathe, can't cook, can't dance, are stupid and have jobs they don't deserve and are not qualified for but it's a defense mechanism. The only generalization I'll accept is that white people don't spend as much on hair and nails as black people do.

I’d like to hear what Kristen Bell’s kids (Tinker, Liberty, and Diving) have to say about being labelled stinky.

Actually R40 soap strips the skin of healthy bacteria.

"By scouring ourselves in the shower every day, we are actually stripping our skin of bacteria that keep us acne- and eczema-free. "

R67 thanks so much for that mental image!

[quote] Wait . . . is Roxanne male or female?

Yes!

It's Roxannx!

The first line on her Twitter profile is, “I want a tiny baby elephant.”

Laugh my fucking ass off. Oh the irony. Honey, just look in the mirror. Presto! There’s your elephant. And bitch, it’s not so tiny.

R88 here’s a book you’ll enjoy!

[quote] think it may be comforting to pretend that all white people don't bathe

Did you read this thread. Most of the responses are angry idiots, defending their poor hygiene.

[quote] Wow, this got crazy. R.Chick, I don't think I've ever peed in the shower but my husband says he does it. No, kids don't need to bathe every night until they're pre-teens or teens. The person who said they don't get stinky like adults is correct. I think that must be someone of a class thing. Some people who are afraid of coming off as lower class won't admit to not bathing their kids every night. I don't care about that, and can admit to not bathing my kids every night when they were younger.

You don’t wait til they stink to bathe them and urinating in the shower is disgusting! It is not a toilet. Some of you live like wild fucking animals. Actually wild animals are probably cleaner than some of you. Lazy and disgusting!

This is a thing I’ve seen Black friends do. It’s to dehumanize the oppressor and self-comfort. “They smell like wet dog” is another common remark.

R95, all one need do is look at Republican officials, and most recently our former president, for proof positive that minimally qualified white people get ahead. I don't dispute that. The problem is pretending this is true of all white people and erasing the differences in background, intelligence, initiative, politics and so on that account for individual success. White privilege is real. The legacy of slavery is real. Structural racism is real. But thinking white people don't bathe is bigotry,

[quote] am genuinely shocked by how badly (some) black people smell despite bathing themselves and their children. And how comforting that we lose our sense of smell during the pandemic.

You’re angry that someone made a generalization about whites not bathing. You’re response: assert that black people stink; even when bathed. Instead of acknowledging that racist generalizations are wrong. You decided that you’re going to out racist, the initial generalization. Because you believe that’s a mature and intelligent response. Thereby I guess proving your racial superiority.

Canadian Appalachia, r72 (rural Nova Scotia). I grew up with my grandparents in an old house. We got a hot water tank in 1997, and an electric stove in 1996. We likely could have gotten the hot water tank before that, but my grandmother was stubborn and insisted that the kettle was all the hot water she needed.

Roxane's horror (if not her casual racism) can be explained. I've heard obese celebrities are sometimes very paranoid about how they smell, because they know people expect them to smell awful.

A friend of mine who works in entertainment said that Bruce Vilanch actually smells nicer than anyone he's ever met in his life.

r100, are you Anne of Green Gables?

Roxane, as usual, seems to be conflating issues. I don't think anyone would deny the fact that minorities have always been expected to be more than the majority, just to be considered equal. I think a lot of gay people here would understand that. But to act like most people aren't repulsed by Ashton and Mila for not bathing, and therefore racism, is reaching so hard.

She WANTS to be a victim. In every situation. She WANTS to complain about every single aspect of life. She'll find a reason to tie every issue she can into oppression. It's actually kinda harmful, I would argue. It diminishes real cases of oppression.

Oh and I really don't know what she's talking about, I don't know ANY white people who brag about not bathing, or any white people who laugh it off and don't care if they come into contact with someone with BO.

For someone who complains constantly about people being stereotyped, she sure does a great job of doing the same thing herself.

From reading both threads (Kunis & Co., and current) there seems to be more than a few posters who seem psychologically damaged by their upbringing, as well as all the adverts that shame us into a belief that we are disgustingly dirty, smelly, etc. There is also little to no correlation between race, class, and cleanliness.

Logically there is a happy medium here, between scrubbing everything and showering daily, and living like a Kutcher or a Kunis. Washing up daily, with soap and a flannel, or synthetic scrubbies will more than suffice for many skin types. They may get by fine with a weekly or twice weekly shower. Some do a quick rinse or use a body wash after the gym, but they aren't scrubbing every bit in there for twenty or thirty minutes. They smell fresh when they leave though.

If people pay attention daily to pits, crotch, arse, and feet, they can easily get by with three showers a week, perhaps fewer if they have dry skin and are not active people.

We're not meant to remove all oil and bacteria; it's impossible anyhow. I like a long hot bath once a week, usually after some serious exfoliating and rinsing. Three showers a week are plenty for me, in addition to my bath, and daily washing up. It's an American habit and hang up to believe you'll stink without a daily shower. It's the soap and the friction which get us clean and remove bacteria, not the rinsing under multiple gallons of water for twenty or thirty minutes. It's wasteful, and completely unnecessary.

Even on long camping and backpacking trips, I don't stink. I find water to wash, whether from a stream, or a well pump, or a lake. I also bring unscented deo or antiperspirant. I'm not bragging, but have gone as long as thirteen days without a proper shower, yet I still managed to keep adequately clean, and stink free.

That said, I wouldn't go as far as the Doc referenced on the Kunis & Kutcher thread who went five years without a shower. The only weird thing is Kutcher not using soap for his arse and feet, and come to think of it, Kunis didn't mention soap for her feet either. Some of these notions about how dirty we are have more deep psychological meaning to some of you. You probably never really feel clean enough.

My god this woman is disagreeable. She's also having a rant on another topic today, but thankfully others are not letting her get away with it:

Original Tweet:

[quote]Angela Bassett has inked a new deal paying her $450,000 an episode for FOX drama 9-1-1. It marks the highest salary a black woman has ever made on broadcast television.

Roxane:

[quote]The friends got $1 million an episode for a lil half hour show. How is this possible. I mean I know but come on.

Other Poster:

[quote]Friends was in syndication - getting $50M per episode. The series just sold for $425M for a 5 year run on HBO/Max. It is not about current status-it has more to do with long term value. If she stays on the show for a decade and it remains #1 she should be rewarded similarly.

Roxane:

[quote]I don’t care mr wizard. Because I actually know all this. I work in TV. Please take your mansplaining where it is welcomed and that is not here.

Other Poster:

[quote]You cared enough to reply. You asked, I answered. I'm not a wizard, but an oncologist. I might suggest not asking questions you don't want answered - or limit them to vagina owners or those who identify as female .

By the way. She works in TV? Or is this just another case of her acting like she knows EVERYTHING?

No one wants to put up with her on this:

"Know"

"Mansplaining"

Her arguments wouldn't convince an 8-year-old:

My goodness, people, Roxane is not a "fucking bigot" for saying "some white people" like the uber-rich faux hipster celebrities Ashton and Mila can get away with sounding gross while other people absolutely cannot.

What gets me the most about these threads is that everyone pretends like there isn't a whole damn industry of social media cranks who are always complaining about something. There's hundreds of them Andy Rooneying all over Twitter, it's not just Roxane. She's just one of them.

I don't care for her one bit (I was indifferent until I saw photos of some of her congealed grease lumps that she called food, then I went to actively disliking her) but the DL notion that she's the only person who does this and is a racist psychopath for it is just ridiculous.

[quote]thinking white people don't bathe is bigotry

She doesn't think that literally. For a while now there's been a lot of online social media talk about how younger whites, Millennials mostly but Zoomers now as well, write so many articles and post so much about how little they bathe. There's all sorts of advice about dry shampoo, "no poo" hair washing, things like that. Just go out to Google and type "how to go without a shower" (no quotes) and look at all the articles in Cosmo, GQ, NPR, USA Today and others giving advice on how to not bathe. For a while YouTube was trying to shove a whole slew of male vloggers who don't shower down my throat, they have multiple videos on how to do it, it's like an obsession with some of them.

That's turned this whole thing into a common generational stereotype.

It's not bigotry. In this case, it's a woman who makes her living by being a crank on Twitter, saying things that make her sound like a crank on Twitter.

[quote]What gets me the most about these threads is that everyone pretends like there isn't a whole damn industry of social media cranks who are always complaining about something.

Well, good news - you can relax, because people aren't doing that on this thread. This thread mentions Roxane, therefore Roxane is going to be discussed. On the thread about Randa Jarrar, she was the one discussed, etc.

[quote]I saw photos of some of her congealed grease lumps that she called food

Oh god, yes. Those photos were revolting (and hilarious!).

Stale sweat has a horrible rancid smell and is common on kids who haven’t washed (or whose clothes haven’t been washed). Bathe your kids, people.

Historically white people can get a bit more lazy about things like this because they know that being sloppy won’t affect their social status all that much. Having said that, this sort of hygiene problem is obviously common in all races and at all times. It seems to vary by parental character, family to family.

I don't feel right if I don't shower morning and night.

Also, the whole kerfuffle over toilet paper during covid made me way too aware of how many people probably don't wash their arse, which is an unpleasant thought.

[quote]you can relax, because people aren't doing that on this thread

I'd argue that this idea that Roxane is being a bigot against whites is a pretty good indicator that people ARE taking her as an isolated example of a racist harassing people of a certain race, rather than as a regular everyday internet crank saying OTT things to get attention.

R73 im white and I think sharing toothbrushes is gross and probably not clever (just for an anecdotal counterexample).

I know that DL hates this woman, but she didn't say that all whites didn't bathe. Why does everything become a game of telephone now?

[quote] For a while now there's been a lot of online social media talk about how younger whites, Millennials mostly but Zoomers now as well, write so many articles and post so much about how little they bathe. There's all sorts of advice about dry shampoo, "no poo" hair washing, things like that. Just go out to Google and type "how to go without a shower" (no quotes) and look at all the articles in Cosmo, GQ, NPR, USA Today and others giving advice on how to not bathe. For a while YouTube was trying to shove a whole slew of male vloggers who don't shower down my throat, they have multiple videos on how to do it, it's like an obsession with some of them.

This thread is filled with Dataloungers explaining that bathing is not necessary and fiercely defending their poor hygiene.

[quote] know that DL hates this woman, but she didn't say that all whites didn't bathe. Why does everything become a game of telephone now?

Roxanne Gay is an obese biracial woman. Therefore Dataloungers can demonize her with bigoted stereotypes and also loudly defend and justify their own refusal to bathe. Essentially they don’t bathe (and their proud of it) but Roxanne Gay is a fat racist with poor hygiene for accusing them of not bathing.

What she said was this:

[quote] I am genuinely shocked by how rarely (some) white people bathe themselves and their children. And how comfortable they are discussing it. During a pandemic.

Now imagine a white person had tweeted that with one word changed:

[quote] I am genuinely shocked by how rarely (some) black people bathe themselves and their children. And how comfortable they are discussing it. During a pandemic.

That white person would be canceled in an instant for being a racist.

It is good to keep young kids a tad dirty helps their immune systems. Not filthy mind you.

[quote] Now imagine a white person had tweeted that with one word changed: That white person would be canceled in an instant for being a racist.

Yes imagine if a white person said that Mexicans were criminals and drug dealers and referred to African countries as “shit holes.” They would instantly be canceled all the way to the White House and 57% of whites would vote to re-elect them. Even after impeachment, hundreds of thousands dead from their mismanagement of a pandemic and a recession.

Right wing media broadcast racist nonsense 24 hours a day everyday. Guess what. Corporations still advertise on those shows.

It’s a good thing for kids to play in the mud, to play with dogs and cats and other animals. *That* is good for their immune system.

But they need to wash off at the end of the day. Going to bed dirty does not help the immune system.

If right-wing media disseminate racist garbage all the time, strike out at them and denounce anyone who appears on Fox News.

I refuse to be a convenient target because those folks are unavailable. In the immortal words of Mariah Carey, I got problems of my own.

[quote]That white person would be canceled in an instant for being a racist.

Probably, but that's because this is where we are right now and I blame that on white people. You guys are perfectly fine with cancelling your own. Black people, alone, do not have the buying power nor the population to cancel anybody. All of this stuff, cancel culture, so-called "woke" culture, listening to the Twitter mob, that's all white people. I saw a BLM protest yesterday. I counted, maybe three, black people in the entire group.

Yes imagine if a white person said that Mexicans were criminals and drug dealers and referred to African countries as “shit holes.” They would instantly be canceled all the way to the White House and 57% of whites would vote to re-elect them. Even after impeachment, hundreds of thousands dead from their mismanagement of a pandemic and a recession.

Right wing media broadcast racist nonsense 24 hours a day everyday. Guess what. Corporations still advertise on those shows.

It's "wypipo," btw.

That was for R64. All the responses after that didn't show up for me until I refreshed.

[quote] Probably, but that's because this is where we are right now and [bold]I blame that on white people. [/bold]

Why, what a surprise.

I agree with R124.

[quote] “They [white people] smell like wet dog” is another common remark.

I’ve also heard raw chicken.

Don't forget behind your ears and your belly button. They get stinky too.

Orientals think that white people really smell bad.

Go ahead and ask them.

If I don't shower every day my hair looks awful.

R132, they stink of the West, stink of sweat, stink of cologne and baccy and all their Yankee hash...

[quote]I work in TV.

Is this true? Or is she just referring to that one time she was on The L Word?

She's still harping on about it today:

Can someone please tweet this to her?

[quote] GO WARSH YOUR PUSSY, BITCH!

I don't have Twitter.

Lol at R136.

Roxane Gay: "I said what I said!"

She's channeling Nene Leakes.

I have no idea who Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard are. Should I be aware of them?

What, exactly, is her end goal here? What does she want to achieve? A requirement that every white person bathe twice a day and think about their privilege while they do so?

Or does she just want to gripe and moan and complain and act victimized yet again?

She really wants to push the idea that every little act committed in the world is directly involved in oppressing her. I guess for a woman who grew up in a rich family, going to fancy schools and having her rent paid by her parents until she was 30, she needs to somehow feel oppressed.

[quote] I guess for a woman who grew up in a rich family, going to fancy schools and having her rent paid by her parents until she was 30, she needs to somehow feel oppressed.

Suffering is good for the soul.

And I have SUFFERED!

...

Well, I think she may be of the impression that she's brigadeering for racial justice in general, not just for herself.

But these folks inadvertently always make it about themselves, because that's the nature of social media. It's really dumb to assume you're the champion of anything by yelling on the Internet. People who do the real work are smarter and do it behind the scenes.

The real work is harder, requires a lot more effort, but is ultimately much more rewarding. And yes, the people who do it don't go around blowing their own horns about it.

People like Roxane, and frankly, most of the people like this on Twitter, think if they spout off a couple of angry Tweets, they've actually done something. It's all for clout. And I get the feeling they wouldn't be happier with a better world, because they would have less to complain about and make all about themselves.

I ask this question to those of you who are piling on her. I can understand the whole shooting the messenger thing, but is her message that crazy? Are you okay with some people not washing their funky asses? If you are, then I have clearly stumbled on to some kind of alternate reality Datalounge. This is the same place where people pull out switchblades in the bar soap versus body wash threads, correct?

Good question, R145.

I bathe twice a day and am very hygiene conscious, so I personally find it gross that others aren't - but it doesn't upset me, as long as I don't have to stand next to them, hehe.

I honestly think if she had left race out of it, no one would really have an issue with what she said. But she seems less concerned with people washing than she does with focusing on a racial aspect to it.

Plus, I think even if she said what she said but was pleasant in her interactions with others, people would be kinder towards her. But she is so utterly nasty in the way she talks to other people, including all the people being respectful towards her. I think this is primarily what gets peoples backs up about her. I mean, look at her response to that guy at R105. That is not a one off, she is like that all the time.

Exactly R146.

Some people, like R145, completely miss the fact that we are faulting her for making this about race. Ironically, she is hurting her own cause, because the pressure on black people gets greater when someone puts anything like this out there. Black people didn't ask for her to highlight how they feel pressure to be clean for Whitey. That's a huge pill for society to swallow - this half white narcissist ain't the messenger for that, and Twitter ain't the right publication either.

Well, can we discuss hair washing frequency next and see what she has to say?

I say that as someone who generally washes my hair twice a week for the same reason I don't wash my legs. I don't need it more and it's not dirty and it dries it out. I just wash it as I see necessary and leave others to decide how frequently they need to wash it (if at all) without judgment.

I am making a gentle point in an empathetic manner, not actually poking the bear. But, it is a pointed point.

[quote] I ask this question to those of you who are piling on her.

Ask away!

True, R148. Ultimately whatever works for people is what works for them. Who am I to judge hygiene levels?

I am, though, a bit less inclined to fantasize about blowing Ashton Kutcher than I was about a week ago...

R147 - great response!

[quote]I am, though, a bit less inclined to fantasize about blowing Ashton Kutcher than I was about a week ago...

Substitute Jake Gyllenhaal for Ashton Kutcher and you have my thoughts exactly.

Okay, I get the point about the race thing. But, you aren't seeing any black celebrities admit to not showering regularly. I just don't understand why anyone would admit to this. Jake Gyllenhaal's ballsack probably smells like swiss cheese. Why tell people?

[quote]And her followers, “I’m white and I agree with you. Please like me, Ms. Gay”

This is so accurate. It's really embarrassing watching her followers fall all over themselves to lick her boots. And I thought I had low self-esteem!

[quote] And her followers, “I’m white and I agree with you. Please like me, Ms. Gay”

Lesbians tend to anoint a Queen Bee, and then they worship her.

I noticed this same thing with Hillary Clinton. Lots of lesbians were calling her "My Queen!"

It's a weird phenomenon with females.

Men don't do this.

Interesting, R154. In the tweet a few posts above, Roxane herself refers to Angela Bassett as a "queen" as sole justification for her being able to command a high salary.

It seems sort of childish to me. Like people who keep saying things like: "How dare you say that on Beyoncé's internet". Ok..?

Roxane's height and stature lend to this "Queen" effect with other lesbians.

She's very tall and very large.

Men make fun of it, but women see it as strength. She's like an Amazon Warrior.

Tell me you wouldn't look at a six foot, three inch woman who weighs 300+ pounds, and not be intimidated by her.

I know I would. And I'm a guy!

MMA fighter Sharice Davids = 5'3"

Roxane Gay = 6'3"

Who would you pick to win?

R156 Yeah. Remember this at the Las Vegas McDonald's?

Rofl R158!

Big women like that are often insecure because of their size, and they have probably been teased a lot when younger.

But you really don't want to piss them off, because they can (and will) squash you like an ANT!

LARGE AND IN CHARGE!

Pictures like that above are certainly much better than the one of her holding her head in her hands and rolling her eyes up that is used in nearly every byline.

Can you imagine what HER nether regions would smell like after a long hike through the woods? Not that she would do that, mind you, but just imagine....

She isn't as fresh as a daily, I can tell you that!

[quote] Jake Gyllenhaal's ballsack probably smells like swiss cheese.

More like fomunda cheese.

Or Limberger

[quote] Pictures like that above are certainly much better than the one of her holding her head in her hands and rolling her eyes up that is used in nearly every byline.

Again, I think she's insecure about her body.

You and I both R161 prefer that photo in the gray suit, but I think she only wants the "neck up" photos.

Personally, I think that suit is flattering on her.

[quote] Jake Gyllenhaal's ballsack probably smells like swiss cheese.

Jake is Dutch, so his balls probably smell like Gouda.

I thought Gyllenhaal was a Swedish name?

I guess you're right, R167.

I always thought it was a Dutch name.

[quote] Jacob Benjamin Gyllenhaal (/ˈdʒɪlənhɔːl/; Swedish: [ˈjʏ̂lːɛnˌhɑːl]; born December 19, 1980) is an American actor and producer. Born into the Gyllenhaal family, he is the son of director Stephen Gyllenhaal and screenwriter Naomi Foner; his older sister is actress Maggie Gyllenhaal.

I guess then, his balls must smell like Drommen Cheese.

[quote] fresh as a daily

Daisy! I'm being crushed here, forgive my error.

It's ok Mr Chair, we know you have a lot to contend with. It can't be much fun when Roxane gets in one of her self-righteous moods, especially.

She's a joke among serious academics

That doesn't surprise me at all R171! I'd love to be a fly on the wall when they discuss her.

She is so gross

R124 Yep, it’s mostly fat, homely young educated white women who feel powerless and invisible. “Cancelling” others and virtual signaling in the extreme are the only ways they are “seen.” Unfortunately a lot of these women end up as teachers/professors.

Very true, R174. And these people annoy those they purport to be speaking on behalf of too.

99% of the time it's overweight, college aged white girls with blue hair and glasses.

^^who call themselves "queer."

Yep. "Queer" in name only though.

[quote] ask this question to those of you who are piling on her. I can understand the whole shooting the messenger thing, but is her message that crazy? Are you okay with some people not washing their funky asses? If you are, then I have clearly stumbled on to some kind of alternate reality Datalounge. This is the same place where people pull out switchblades in the bar soap versus body wash threads, correct?

White celebs are proudly publicly celebrating their poor hygiene. Dataloungers routinely discuss their own reluctance to regularly bathe. This thread is mostly filled with Dataloungers attempting to justify not bathing regularly. Yet Dataloungers (who turn even the most mundane and benign threads into a KKK rally) are disturbed that Roxanne Gay made this “about race.” She’s forcing them to say the white supremacist nonsense that they always say.

All people eventually smell. Lord knows I've been around some smelly black folks. And white folks. And Asian folks. And so on. No 'race' is above criticism on this issue. Different bodies require different hygiene habits, but ultimately, wash yourself. No on wants to smell your nasty ass.

That being said, why these celebs even want to tell the public they have horrible hygiene...why? Just, why?

R175 and real YA literature exclusively. These women used to worship J K Rowling…no more. Somehow it’s immensely satisfying to tear down and denounce that which you once loved. Human nature, I guess.

[quote]you aren't seeing any black celebrities admit to not showering regularly

Absolutely agree r152 and I think if she'd stuck with "what's with these rich white celebrities bragging about not washing their butts?" kind of talk, and pointing out that pretty much only white people of a certain level of wealth can get away with bragging about not washing, that would have been fine.

The problem is she doubled down with "well then this isn't about you, now is it?" replies to people, and she went into Tressie McMillan's replies and went after some well-meaning guy with 26 followers for basically no reason.

Overall, though, her behavior isn't nearly as bad as a lot of people here are making it sound like.

[quote]Like people who keep saying things like: "How dare you say that on Beyoncé's internet".

Those are JOKES. Do you really not know?

I shower twice a day even when I don’t go anywhere. I love how a shower in the morning wakes me up and I cannot imagine purring on clean clothes without one. At night, a hot shower with a few drops of lavender oil is very soothing befire sliding into clean sheets (I change mine every 2-3 days, but that’s another thread). Doesn’t everyone feel good after a shower?!

I had a child friend who attended a Junior college for rich granola kids. Other Gen Xers will know the type I mean: Lots of tie-tye, Birkenstock’s, hackeysack and dreadlocks on white guys (it was OK back then). The Grateful Dead and the scents of pot and patchouli ooozed from evey dorm room, women eschewed bras and shaving their legs as a symbol of the patriarchy and everyone got rid of their bedframes to sleep on a mattress on the floor. Above the mattress would hang either that famous black and white shot of Jim Morrison, a Coltrane poster or most often, a sheet sized piece of printed cotton fabric invariably referred to as a “tapestry.” You know what I mean. Anyway, I’d visit my friend and she and her friends would boast about no longer bathing. She and her floppy haired boyfriend came over one evening to help us decorate our Christmas tree and my mother told me the smell was making her sick. She said I was not a good friend if I didn’t tell her to bathe, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Anyway, yes, this faction of rich hippy granolas are often smelly.

^ putting on, before, childhood

I need new glasses.

[quote]Those are JOKES. Do you really not know?

Um, ok.

Haha?

[quote]Overall, though, her behavior isn't nearly as bad as a lot of people here are making it sound like.

Most people here I think have been aware of her behaviour for a long time now. She's done some pretty disgusting things (see her part in the Kate Elizabeth Russell kerfuffle for example), and so I guess a lot of people are looking at the overall picture, not just what she is doing in this case.

I would argue, even being horrible to one person in this particular situation is one person too many.

As for me, I actually think if she sorted her attitude out I'd probably quite like her.

R109

[Quote] It’s low for a queen. Next.

This is the argument of a five year old. How does this woman get paid to write columns for the New York Times?

What is a “queen?” An exceptionally talented black woman or just any black woman?

[quote]That being said, why these celebs even want to tell the public they have horrible hygiene...why? Just, why?

They don't believe they are telling the public this, that's why. Their point of view is that people bathe too much, because doing so is bad for the environment and your skin, and that the notion we must shower and wash hair every day is a habit that might be worth challenging for those reasons.

This is a Cali thing. It's not only the land of tree huggers and celebrities, it's also a place where drought is an every day reality. I've lived here most of my life, and I can sympathize with efforts to try and model behavior toward using less water.

It's all a balancing act ultimately. Cleaning yourself is critical for your health, but there is always a 'too much'. Everyone has their own idea of what is 'too much' - that's the issue here, really.

Daily bathing is not "too much."

You know what's "too much?" Being crushed by intense weight, every day!

I have oily hair and I perspire easily. I shower twice a day because I feel disgusting if I don't.

R190 - that's your opinion. I agree with your opinion, personally, but maybe one day a week I can let myself not shower and not worry about it.

Other people have other opinions than we do. That's my point. You can judge them all you like, but it won't make you any more enlightened about why people do things certain ways.

Bathing once a week is disgusting, and it's not enough. Sorry r193 that is not an opinion.

I am shocked that a board full of incredibly stereotypical gay men are ok with not bathing regularly.

I mean, I do take slightly less showers than I used to two or three years ago.

Mainly because of the pandemic (I am not outside as often) and also because my area is in a drought.

[quote] Jake Gyllenhaal's ballsack probably smells like swiss cheese.

HOT!

[quote]This is the argument of a five year old. How does this woman get paid to write columns for the New York Times?

Exactly! People should be laughing her off Twitter, but instead it's all "Preach!"

I don't think the 1% have to worry about the writers of the future firing up the public anymore, that's for sure.

[quote]she went into Tressie McMillan's replies

Oh god, that Tressie woman is just as insufferable as Roxane. No wonder they get along so well.

Here they are together, R199!

That must have been one HELL of a bitch fest!!

Hahaha R200! Probably telling some story like:

"...and so after I chopped my finger off we went to the hospital and the doctor came in and started trying to tell me what to do to save my finger, and I was like: 'I DON'T NEED YOUR ADVICE! DO YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW THIS?' Lord, give me the confidence of a mediocre MAN!"

"Preach!"

Lol R201!

I'm imagining something like:

Roxane: "Gurl, my titties are almost touching the ground!"

Tressie: "Child, you gonna have to sling them things over your shoulder pretty soon!"

Roxane: "Mmmm hmmm...."

Reminds me of that children's song, rewritten:

Do your tits hang low? Do they wobble to-and-fro? Can you tie them in a knot? Can you tie them in a bow? Can you toss them over your shoulder like a regimental soldier? Do your tits hang low?

R202 That sounds very stereotypical. Ms. Gay would never speak like that. She speaks like she has a stick up her ass.

She doesn't, though. Although I've almost been swallowed up whole once or twice.

Why doesn't she do something about her weight?

I love peeing in the shower.

Her next book: When Everything is a Microaggression

That could be an omnibus collection of her tweets, R207, haha!

[quote] This is a Cali thing. It's not only the land of tree huggers and celebrities, it's also a place where drought is an every day reality. I've lived here most of my life, and I can sympathize with efforts to try and model behavior toward using less water.

Yet none of them have mentioned anything about the drought and I guarantee you that their mansions have beautiful green lawns.

R189 some interesting points, but I think R209 is right. None of them really mention the environmental impacts and all that jazz. And yes, they use more than their fair share of water considering their estates. Let's not fool ourselves. This is simply about poor hygiene, and living inside a bubble that has impaired their ability to understand how this 'reads' to the rest of society. That simple.

It's not really a California thing (I am born and raised here). Yes, we're aware of our drought issues, but I've never heard anyone use that specifically as an excuse to not bathe regularly (other than the typical hippie types, maybe). I respect that individual bodies require different hygiene habits...but for the most part, those that truly smell bad do so simply because they are lazy with overall poor hygiene.

Good god, she does realise that if she just wrote clearly the first time she wouldn't have people understandably thinking she meant something else? No, it's everyone else's fault that they can't read her mind.

When Roxane goes into HMart they all scream and run because they think Godzilla decided to shop for some green onions.

Only a masochist would read her feed. "I wasn't attacking you. But if the shoe fits." That seems to be her shtick.

That Tressie woman just had a big bitch on Twitter about men mowing their lawns (during the day, on weekends). The noise annoys her, and the reason she thinks they do it is not because the lawn needs mowing, but to get under women's skin as an act of toxic masculinity or something.

I can't with these people.

Tressie is much worse than Roxane, if Tressie was ever accidentally funny like Roxane can be, SHE would be the one getting all the hate here on DL.

I agree with you, R215. She's utterly miserable and if we think Roxane is always looking for victimisation, we ain't seen nothing yet!

I love how I can agree with Roxane Gay and still fucking hate her.

R194, reading comprehension failed you again.

My opinion was that bathing every day "except maybe one day per week" was acceptable to me. That's six days a week, in case you are also math challenged.

Our darling Roxane has been outraged about this so much, she's written an essay, published on her site "The Audacity".

Her responses on Twitter and elsewhere to people, including people supporting her position, are, as expected, unpleasant and sarcastic.

Carrie writes:

[quote]’m fascinated and baffled by the attention these three very wealthy, privileged, and oh so Hollywood mavens are getting for their truly outlier take on cleanliness. Please don’t assume most white people do this. In the Goop-ified, vag steaming circles of the elite, maybe this is a thing.. In all the years this I’ve been white-the entirety of my existence- I have NEVER heard white people bragging about being dirty. I mean, not once. I’m not wealthy, or even “well-to-do”, so maybe it’s a... class thing? I’m just astounded at the number of articles and posts and blogs that are keeping this narrative alive that “white people are filthy” based off the words of LITERALLY 3 families. MOST WHITE PEOPLE DON’T DO THIS!

Roxane responds:

[quote]I think you underestimate your fellow white people. I've seen it quite a lot in my life. And I am not alone in this. Why are you so... defensive? If this isn't about you, it isn't about you.

Roxane, hon? That's a logical fallacy, not an argument.

She sure does that "this isn't about you" thing a LOT.

Roxane is right that white people in the past (and even some to this day) will say people of non-white races are dirty or "look dirty." She takes it a step further and says that being deliberately unclean is a white thing, giving examples like some white girls she said she knew in high school who bragged about not washing. That's when people say no, it's not a white thing. And it's not; with the exception of the "dirty hippie" and subsequent countercultural movements of the same type, there's never been any kind of mass movement of white people bragging about being dirty.

Roxane won't admit that because, like all Twitterati, her brand is about being right all the time, and she cannot let herself be wrong.

[quote]Roxane won't admit that because, like all Twitterati, her brand is about being right all the time, and she cannot let herself be wrong.

I think this is the most perfect encapsulation of what Roxane is that I have read so far. Add in a desperate need to be the victim in every situation, and there you have her.

What is Roxane's end goal? Does she actually want to make the world better in any way, or does she just want to gripe and moan for the rest of time? I never really see anything positive about how we improve human rights. And why not? - when once she responded to someone, angrily: "human rights is my lane, bitch!"

Here's a funny example of Roxane's prickliness...

She posted a story on "The Audacity" (ROFL!), and this is Roxane's response to someone:

And this is the author's response to that same person. Quite a difference in tone:

What did it say, R224?

She deleted it.

She seems to just be a horrible person.

She's a bully.

That's offensive to bulls, R228.

She is a miserable person, which is odd because she lives a very cushy life.

R230 Cushy life or not, being obese is very uncomfortable, both mentally and physically. . She hates what she sees in the mirror and probably has aches and pains you can’t even imagine, such as in her hips and knees.

Fortunately for her, it is now the Era of the Perpetually Aggrieved, so at least she can cash it on that. Robin di Angelo is making a killing, why not Roxanne?

R226, oh I should've quoted it in the post, sorry about that. I didn't think she would delete it, but more fool me, because she has a habit of doing that.

I can't remember the exact words, but it was along the lines of:

"THAT'S what you took out of this? Really?" but in a very nasty way. I find it hilarious that she deleted it, because I can imagine her seeing the perfectly normal response from the actual author and realising what a cunt she (Roxane) was being.

I'd bet anything that's EXACTLY what happened, r232. She realized she looked bad when the author who made the mistake wasn't rude about it like she had been.

That Tressie McMillan Cottom woman wrote something today and it just made me roll my eyes and also feel kinda sad, because it really struck home how miserable people like, her, Roxane and many Twitterers really are. How they've wed themselves so firmly to this idea of scolding people, being offended, demanding apologies, etc.

Tressie posted a picture of herself, and this woman, kinda bizarrely, commented on the picture:

[quote]Love it!!! Might I suggest: paint the risers on your stairs, sherwin-Williams Urbane bronze. That would add some warmth and depth, and tie in really well with your potted plant.

Tressie and all her followers have piled onto this woman, telling her how rude she is, how she needs to apologise and shut up, delete her Twitter etc. The woman did apologise and said she merely loves interior design and thought she was helping (potentially on the spectrum, I wonder?), but everyone was just so angry. Tressie called her a "heffa" (sic - and really body positive there, Tress!) and said it was insulting that white people want "us to live like them".

And I thought, wow. Where is anyone's sense of humour? It WAS a weird comment to make, but any normal person would've surely just made fun. These people totally missed the opportunity to make: "Might I suggest sherwin-Williams Urbane Bronze?" a funny catch phrase/in joke. If this had happened on DL, you at least know Lizsha would've appeared to discuss "shhherwin-Williamsh Urbane Bronzshe".

And that's when it hit me how desperate to play the miserable scold these people are and what unpleasant lives they must lead.

One person at least tweeted, in response to calls for an apology:

[quote]LOL. Is a formal apology for giving an unsolicited home decor suggestion really necessary? C'mon. It's enough that we're all laughing at her.

There’s no point at being angry with Roxanne Gay. She’s not forcing white celebs to make announcements celebrating their poor hygiene. And many Dataloungers have also proclaimed that don’t bathe regularly. You cannot acknowledge and defend not bathing. Then become angry, when someone repeats your comments.

But that’s not the issue, r235. Roxane saw a story about some narcissistic movie stars and turned it into a whole thesis about white people not bathing. Look, I don’t read Roxane and generalize “wow, black people sure are lazy thinkers.”

I looked that up r234 and Tressie was way out of line. She only gets away with this kind of thing because there are a lot of people who think Twitter is there for them to be abusive.

Did you see her tweet today about how she's had so much positive feedback over the last day or two she's now dealing with physical issues like ringing ears? I cannot imagine how miserable she must be if one day of positive interactions is giving her physical symptoms.

Roxane Gay gets off on making people apologize for being white.

Had considered subscribing to Tressa Cottom's newsletter because of NYT hype. Then I read her twitter feed, It's chock full of info I don't care about like the state of her sinuses today and slaps at people who displease her like the woman who suggested painting her stairs. I don't care about her sinuses or her stairs or want to be a punching bag. Next.

Dear Roxane and Tressa: I

am not the reason your life isn't working. I have not deprived you of generational wealth or of doing anything you want with your life. I realize my very existence prevents a person of color from holding my job, but I have to make a living. I have worked very hard and gone into a lot of debt to gain credentials and was not handed my job because I was white. I bathe. I have never used the N word or wanted to. I would never knowingly disrespect you or any person of color but for those who are hypersensitive, anything can be twisted in a microaggression. I am at peace with myself and will never attend another DEI session at work again, unless forced to do so, because they've become a Lollapalooza for POC dredging up every shitty thing that ever happened to them. Believe me, I could match you and then some.

Some Black people are narcissists. Some white people are masochists. I don't want to associate with either one.

Have a nice life, ladies. It will not intersect with mine.

Well said, R240.

Agreed, R237. Yeah, I saw that tweet too. She is an odd lady. It actually grosses me out how many of these Twitter people know they have a following who will attack anyone and are happy to sic them on others/let the followers be outright nasty to others.

[quote]or want to be a punching bag.

So true! I think there are a lot of masochists out there who don't mind this. A lot of Roxane's followers seem to be in kind of awe/terror of her.

[quote]Look, I don’t read Roxane and generalize “wow, black people sure are lazy thinkers.”

Haha, this is a brilliant comeback. Would love it if someone responded to her like this one time.

She doesn't look black to me.

Yes, you need to know who Kristen Bell is. She is Anna in Frozen (Elsa's little brownish-red haired sister). Frozen is a cultural phenomenon.

A few years ago, when I was going full Karen in a CVS for some reason, I did say to the manager that I didn't know how he could smell so bad in a place that sold so much deodorant. A really nice black kid who worked there tried to defend him, and said something like it was part of the guy's religion to smell bad (manager was Indian type). Black kid still works there and he's so nice. Not my main CVS though, it's my secondary CVS. Yes, I am embarrassed.

R242 That kid sounds hilarious and adorable.

[quote]Roxane Gay gets off on making people apologize for being white.

This certainly does seem to be her raison d'être.

Oh dear...

Damn, she's already deleted all her nasty replies to people on this one, so have no idea what she was saying, but people aren't having it:

Me so sorry. My dogma has been buried. I am woke now, oh great one! 🤡

Lately it does seem like she's deleting a hell of a lot more tweets than usual, and people are more willing to push back on her too. I suppose she'll always have her sycophants, but I imagine a number of people who did like her must have gotten sick of her behaviour after so many years of it.

She's just a miserable, unpleasant person.

[quote]Robin di Angelo is making a killing, why not Roxanne?

Am I imagining it, or did diAngelo release a second book on white fragility and it got completely panned? I guess her moment in the sun has very quickly dwindled.

I guess she can cope by counting all her money r250.

Making all that money spreading segregationist, bad faith rubbish around, trying to incorporate it into workplaces? God, that's depressing.

I fully believe diAngelo IS a racist. Where she trips up is assuming everyone else thinks like her.

Robin DiAngelo has made a VERY lucrative living from her little race hustle.

BTW, she lives in an affluent neighborhood in the Seattle metro area that's overwhelmingly white. The closest black person is miles away.

Oh god, unfortunately that doesn't surprise me at all R253. She's a repulsive person all round. I can't believe she duped so many people. Ramps up suspicion and hatred between people and then retires to her all white area. Jesus.

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

Anyone who does not wash their legs should go jump in a pool for about an hour, or just soak in a bath for an hour, and then get out of the water and apply any sort of friction to your legs, even simply running your hands across your skin. You will instantly see why you need to wash your fucking legs.

It is interesting to me that Roxane has a nice, easy voice in her Times column and her advice is kind and levelheaded. That could be editors, of course, or it could be that Twitter brings out the worst in her. I have colleagues who are calm and pleasant in person and on other social media platforms but become monsters on Twitter. Is it the speedy tempo of the platform?

[quote] What is Roxane's end goal?

Carbs, by the looks of it.

R257, Twitter does seem to bring out the worst in people. But have you ever heard her speak? She adopts this really tired, 'I can't believe I have to say this, this is so exhausting but I don't really care, this is all beneath me' kind of tone during debates and discussions, so when I read her words, I hear this tone.

Not everything she writes is stupid though. She did a good article earlier this year about the Jan 6 thing, for example.

Now Roxane is getting into it with Patricia Arquette! Hahaha.

This is very "whatabout" for someone like Roxane who claims to hate it when people do that.

Patricia: I hope the 10 richest families in haiti step up and help the people this time.

Roxane: I mean absolitely but I hope you say this to America’s richest families too.

Patricia: Yes I do and some of them do.

She's also trying to get people to donate to Hope for Haiti, an organisation of which her father is on the board of directors, and people are calling her out on it.

Ahhh... so this explains then her "whataboutism" with Patricia Arquette...

How much more does that god forsaken shithole Haiti expect ? Wheres the billions the entire world sent them after the earthquake?Never mind they havent rebuilt one goddamed thing. Fuck them. Id also like to point out that florida is heaving with Haitians,and the majority are ignorant filthy and lazy .All they want is welfare and freebies. Not all of them ,of course,but enough to make it a cliche .

It's not the Haitians... so much of the donated money never got to where it was meant to go. Many of these charitable organisations are terrible like that. You have to be so careful where you send your money (I choose Médecins Sans Frontières at the moment).

[quote]everything about these celebs having performative politics makes so much sense the more you pull at the thread

"Absolitely" Roxane?

I'm confused, Patricia's father is the late Cliff Arquette. Who is Michael Gay? And the 10 richest families remark is absolutely odd.

From what Patricia said elsewhere, back in 2010 she went and did humanitarian work in Haiti and spoke to members of the richest families in Haiti who refused to help. I think that's what she's getting at.

Roxane is defensive about anything to do with Haiti, I think, which is why she tried it with Patricia.

Michael Gay is Roxane's father. He is on the board of directors for Hope for Haiti, and there are accusations among some people that he did very good business and became quite wealthy out of the tragedies of Haiti. Roxane is trying to push people to not donate to the Red Cross, but donate to Hope for Haiti instead, without disclosing her father is the vice chair or something.

I think that sums up what is going on, but it does feel like one of those situations where more is happening behind the scenes than we can be aware of.

I saw someone say about Roxane that 'it is fitting that she went from “writer of dubious acclaim” to “shitty social media gossip” in just a few years’ time.' which made me laugh.

Woke--a word I seldom use--college students love her. Probably because, like Olivia in White Lotus, she's a source of one-liners they can us on their parents.

Michael Gay described himself in an interview as a billionaire. Roxane has no good reason to be bitter or to weigh as much as a Toyota.

She never mentions the fact that she comes from a well-off family and her parents paid her rent and supported her until she was in her thirties.

She's probably so angry because deep down she knows she is very privileged - more privileged than a lot of the people she attacks on Twitter.

Too high, so you couldn't get over it

Too low, so you couldn't get under it

Too wide, so you couldn't get around it...

It used to be that if someone disagreed with Roxane on Twitter, she would snap at them and they would apologise/try to make amends.

Lately, whenever I go to her Twitter I see more and more people criticising her, rightly or wrongly, and when she snaps at them, they keep digging the knife in. It feels like Roxane's days at the top seem to be over. I can't blame people, all these years of her attacking others when they are nice to her, bullying and piling on, have made people's patience wear thin perhaps. Not that I'm saying she's heading for a big fall or anything, just that it's noticeable how many people in her comments don't tow the line anymore.

Here is one example from today:

Roxane: Today is publication day for @rafiazakaria’s Against White Feminism, a thoughtful and provocative collection calling for a sharper feminism that decenters whiteness and the conditions that allowed white feminism to prosper. It is a must read.

Canyon Dood: I’d want to read it. But I’m not a big fan of skin color identity and lumping the diversity of European backgrounds into one group. Especially hate the anger towards European women trying to get out from under oppression of centuries..too much anger. Ima judge book by cover.

Roxane: This is asinine. Honestly just keep this nonsense to yourself.

Canyon Dood: Lol. In the 90s my Anthropology seminar on race, discussed the census. And Arabs used to be classified as White. So, I threw the color shit out Bach then...it’s not based on culture. As an ambiguous ethnicity in So Cal...I think the term white is Empowering to racists.

Roxane: I don’t care about your absolutely absurd outlook. Have a nice day

Canyon Dood: Thanks. I’m a fellow Sweetwater High reader...stay at home mom with college degrees, but that’s okay. I get it my voice and opinion don’t matter. No matter how many wars my ancestors fought for US. Or how recent my family came from Sicily (very multiethnic island).

Sweet Valley High...(my grandpa went to Sweetwater High.)

Roxane: Oh stop. This is the embodiment of white feminism. Text book. I strongly urge you to read this book.

---

It's PAINFULLY obvious that Roxane has no arguments, or even the ability to do more than insult others. She can't engage, so she attacks. She is so one-note too, she will tie everything she can to white people - when you look further into it, in this case she wants to tie the horror of Afghanistan to white feminists like... Laura Bush? Apparently all white feminists were clamouring to get into the war.

She is way too old to be so mixed up about what happened back then.

Actually, the embodiment of white feminism is announcing a mentoring initiative in honor of your birthday, replete with celebrities signing on, but I don't see Roxane complaining about that.

Even when I agree with her and not them, I find myself laughing when Roxane gets criticised by others. She's so goddamn unpleasant.

Roxane talking to herself again:

[quote]You’re not old and cranky. You’re intellectually lazy and disinterested in your world view being challenged. And I am not saying this meanly. You really think you’re doing something here. But it’s just sad.

This made me laugh, I like to think it's someone trolling her:

Are there a ton of people attacking her for "telling people what to do with their bodies"?

Good point R279. There should be.

Lately on Twitter she is becoming almost deranged with her turning everything into a race issue. She must be so unhappy.

[quote] It’s always appreciated when a PhD weighs in with a word salad.

If it weren't for word salad, no salad would ever cross her lips at all.