Hiding your boner (erection)

“The receptionist took the day off.”

Yeah.

Right.

So neither one of you was wearing a mask?

[quote]How do I track him down?

You can meet up in the ICU soon enough.

Time to get a notepad or work folder to conceal mr. stiffy.

If the delivery guy knows your last name now perhaps you'll get a friend request on FB. Next time when he asks for your last name you should ask for his.

Where the hell do you work that the COVID protocols are so shitty? The White House?

[quote]This morning I happened to be sitting at the front reception desk of my office. The receptionist took the day off.

Gurl.

I’ve seen OP’s boner, he only needs a sticky note pad to hide it.

Poor thing, you're 48 and filling in for the front desk girl?

[quote]He asked if I was looking fire to the weekend

What does that even mean?

OP, you should've raised your Caftan a couple inches and exposed your bare ankle, coquettishly! But no. Not you! Because you are a DL WHORE, you had to take things to the extreme and show off your rock hard cock! You scared him off! Now, you'll never know what it's like to fuck, marry, and divorce a UPS delivery man!

Can you spot an erection of a micro peen?

Thank you for putting erection in parentheses, op. I wasn't sure what a boner was.

This is why I love DL. It didn't even register with me that he had done that, R11. I'm now laughing so hard (but not like an erection).

R12 - omg I’m laughing so hard also and my partner’s quizzically staring at me. 😂

OP Finally, I've been waiting for a hot guy with a big package to arrive at my front door.

I think your fupa would hide your erection OP.

You are too old to be the girl at the front desk. Better yourself.

Girl, next time he cums in, you need to do the bend and snap!

Bend. And... snap!

You sound like an eldergay. Why didn't you drop a pin and see if he picks it up.

OP, but did you cum (ejaculate)?

[quote]The receptionist took the day off.

Was it because she had to go to the abortion clinic, OP?

[quote] He asked if I was looking fire to the weekend I don’t even know what I said in response.

I bet you didn't say anything, since "looking fire to the weekend" makes no sense.

[quote]Poor thing, you're 48 and filling in for the front desk girl?

OP is the front desk girl.

I like the phrase [italic] looking fire to the weekend. [/italic] Not sure how or when I might use it yet. But I’d love to find the right context for it.

Looking *forward* to the weekend.

[quote] Was it because she had to go to the abortion clinic, OP?

An abortion, Michael! Just like our marriage is an abortion!

Most importantly, why would start a sentence with "So?"

I'm having an abortion and I CAN'T WAIT!

[quote]He asked if I was looking fire to the weekend I don’t even know what I said in response.

When I read this, I thought OP was lying and the FedEx person was actually a sassy black chick, because I see black women refer to things as being "fire" (hot).

[quote]When I read this, I thought OP was lying and the FedEx person was actually a sassy black chick, because I see black women refer to things as being "fire" (hot).

So does DL's own "sassy black chick," a certain TikTok- and Aaron Schock-obsessed troll I won't name.

.....and obsessed with Dylan Geick. And Kegan Keller. And Levi Conley.

R29 - who ISNT obsessed with Dylan Geick!!?!?

You make up a lot of stupid threads, OP. What has caused you to be this desperate for attention?

How in the hell was that movie @R16 so popular? I've never watched it and I couldn't even sit through that clip.

Op, the only thing hard for you is your pathetic life.

R32 popular enough that it spawned a sequel, a Broadway musical, and they are starting filming the third one now. It's an alarming longevity for such scant source material.

R34, it shocks me. Truly. I mean I don't have a problem watching fun/dumb movies, but that scene was just awful.

R 34 and r35 I love Jennifer Coolidge She was awesome in Legally Blonde!! And of course Raquel Welch as bitchy mom to Chutney!!

My favorite character was Holland Taylor as the gruff professor whose heart grows three times in response to Elle Woods' unorthodox approach to the legal system. She's pretty much Professor McGonagall Goes to Washington.

I don't mean to victim-blame, OP

But maybe you shouldn't be wearing your caftans so tight...

I don't hide it, dear. I embrace and proudly showing it off.

R39, I like to embrace my erections too. I hug my cock with both hands and squeeze it lovingly.

R40, (jerk-off)

also: (masturbate)

That UPS guy in the OP is hot!