Nominations Are Now In Order For DL's New Official Old Bitchy Cunt Actress

Sue Sarandon meets all the qualifications.

Can it be an old actor?

[quote] Cannot be Dionne Warwick

I don't think she mee-ts the re-quirements. She's not an actress first of all.

Joan Collins

Jane Fonda is free these days, always looking for a little attention, when she’s not looking for a rich husband. She’ll gladly take this honor!

[quote]I don't think she mee-ts the re-quirements. She's not an actress first of all.

Guest stints on Rockford Files, Switch, and The Fall Guy. How dare you, sir!

Julie Andrews

R7, is Julie Andrews a cunt? Which reminds me, I need to re-read the true-life account of the secret affair between JA and a young Mormon gal. That was highly entertaining!

Are you zsherious?

Cloris Leachman

I think so R8. JA just seems too goody two shoes to be true

Someone else mentioned Marsha Hunt on one of the Olivia de Havilland threads. Gay ally and, more importantly, 102.

Dame Maggie

R12 no one knows who she is.

I nominate Angela Lansbury, her feud was with Lucy.

Has to be over 100.

R14, does Lansbury have a past of cunty behavior?

No, R16, but she did play the cuntiest mother of all time next to Medea.

Can it be anyone but M?

R16 she refused to ever let Patty Duke guest on MSW because she stile her Oscar. She said that if women dress sexy they should expect to be knocked down and raped!

Tovah Feldshuh. Five-Star Cunt, certifiable. Award winning, if you count an Outer Critics Circle Awards. If she has no long-running feud, it would be because NO ONE CARES about her.

Patti LuPone.

Would that 99-year-old bastard Prince Philip fit the bill?

Coke mom Debra Messing

Prince Philip would be terrific but he's never been the sympathetic sort

Debra Winger

Debra Messing

Susan Sarandon

Megan Mullaley

Viola Davis

Bitch bitch bitch

Is there categories? A list, B list, C list, D? What is the name of the prestigious award/ honor?

Some of your requirements didn't match up with Livvy's predecessor, Luise Rainer--so why so restrictive?

[quote] What is the name of the prestigious award/ honor?

The SOld.

I second the nomination for Julie Andrews. I have personally seen her cunting behaviors. This time, her work will not be egregiously overlooked.

[quote] Some of your requirements didn't match up with Livvy's predecessor, Luise Rainer--so why so restrictive?

I think the only requirements from OP's list should be:

Old

Award winning

Cannot be Dionne Warwick, i.e., has to be a well-known actress

I agree. Seems to me that age is the most important requirement. She has to be old enough that people think, "Wow, she's still alive?"

Too young, but in about 20 years, DL fave Joyce Bulifant.

Arlene Dahl

In about another 30 years, international star of stage, screen and TV Rula Lenska.

[quote] Arlene Dahl

She's still alive, but she no longer looks good.

Kate Jackson

Rhonda Fleming

Gena Rowlands

Meghan Markle is made for this role. Limiting the field to "old" seems like blatant age discrimination. And she fits all the other qualifications

Kim Novak

Dionne Warwick would work.

She could claim to have divined deaths after they happened.

Not an actress but easily the biggest cunt ...

HELL FUCKING LO?

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

How about Ann "Veda" Blyth? She's old as hell and played an iconic, bitchy character

How about Carroll Baker? (89)

Claire Bloom? (89)

Ann Blyth? (91)

Leslie Caron? (89)

Joan Collins? (87)

Actress-tigress-survivor Mitzi Gaynor? (88)

None of these are stunningly elderly, but they bear watching. I'll keep looking for someone even older.

Faye Dunaway isn't old enough and she's already the DL Patron Saint of Crazy divas.

Betty White is a nasty bitch and she 98.

If she were a bit older, Shirley MacLaine would be absolutely perfect. Bitchy, award-winning, has been around forever and has some of Olivia’s narcissistic cluelessness.

What r28 and r32 said. The most important thing is they are OLD.

They have be old enough that they could say "So Young" at 99% of people who would die.

Are these awards called the Bitchies or the Cunties?

What sort of statue will they receive?

Jane Powell (91)

Joanne Woodward (90)

Betty White (98)

Janis Paige (97)

Of all the ones I've posted, I think Janis Paige has the most potential. She's just obscure enough to be an in-joke, and 97 is plenty old.

I'm leaning toward Angela Lansbury. She's not a centenarian at 94, but she's very well known. She could be around for several years.

The CUNTY award

Although, Norman Lloyd is really the best candidate for a "So young..." troll, even if he's not a B.C. Actress!

Eva Marie Saint. Long hollywood career, oscar winner, 96.

R55 I agree.

It needs to be someone everyone knows and I'd rather it not be Shitley, even her name sets me on edge

[quote] Eva Marie Saint. Long hollywood career, oscar winner, 96.

Good one. With our luck she'll be dead by the end of September.

I would suggest Barbara Rush, but she apparently is a very nice person. She did appear in Can't Stop the Music, was married to Jeffrey Hunter and won a Sarah Siddons Award. She's 93.

These are all ancient cunts. There should be Ancient, Elder, Old, Aging, Queen and Ingenue categories.

Fuck you people. I'm chopped liver?

After all the torment I've been through?

Just because you shits don't know me doesn't mean I don't grieve every time a youngster drops dead.

DL should have prepared for this sad day sooner. With all this death we won't have an official condoler for weeks now

Norman Lloyd is the winner for me, he's a hundred and fucking five soon to be 106.

He's older than Livvie and Luise were

But he's a maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan, R64!

[quote] There should be Ancient, Elder, Old, Aging, Queen and Ingenue categories.

Admittedly, I am the oldest member of the Ingenue category.

R65 He's still an old bitchy cunt.

Trans bitchy cunt!

Will there be an In Memoriam category for the Queen of all Cunts, Miss Joan Crawford?

[R30], do tell. Calla Lillies Hepburn would own this if she hadn’t croaked.

Take my "pole" please:

OP is a cunt. I'm an Emmy-winning star of stage and screen. I am 100 years old. Yet OP's stupid requirements take me out of the running.

It doesn't work if it's a man R64.

No offense R71, but I had to Google Marge Champion and I'm in my late 40s. If you have to Google the person, what's the point?

R70's "pole" only counts votes if you vote for Angela Lansbury...

It should be Angela Lansbury. She’s the only one of these people that is well known.

Marlo Thomas aka THAT GIRL!

R76, good choice.

Frieda Claxton

R38 A second vote here for Gena Rowlands.

Jeepers Gena Rowlands is only 90! Way to fricking young for the job, no one would take her seriously.

Damn, R66 beat me to a CZJ/ingenue reference. You magnificent bitch!

How about Miss George Chakiris or Miss Earl Holliman?

Linda Lavin?

If someone is in their 80s (or younger) they are too young.

George Maharis

R85, are you also R82?

^ Yep, I am!

Thank you, R87/85/R82.

Wow. I know Madonna is a snippy, rude, and insecure cunt, but that video at R42 was an eye-opener. I can smell her holier-than-thou, angry, twat through my iPhone. Good music though, I have to say.

I don't think of Liza as the cunt sort. Dizzy, addled, daffy, sweet but never a cunt.

Christine McVie.

Angela Lansbury isn't a cunt.

New and improved "pole". Now with additional choices.

Cicely Tyson.

She's 95 and she's a woman for 2020, you know.

You know.

I like Cloris as the choice. She’s an ancient drunk who hates fat people, which makes her ripe for the DL treatment.

Love Cloris!

Blucher!

Eva Marie Saint at the Academy Awards a couple years ago. She was 94 at the time and still glamorous as fuck.

There should be a Crone category too.

I nominate Cloris as well. I have friends who have worked with her, and they hate her. Apparently she has something akin to Tourette's, where she calls people cunts all the time.

[quote] Apparently she has something akin to Tourette's, where she calls people cunts all the time.

Is she on DL?

Martha Stewart meets OP’s criteria. She will be 79 next week and therefore will have entered her 80th year. She can out cunt anyone, even her Class A cunt of a daughter. She and Ina Garten are in a cunting death match. As for awards, Martha has won a Daytime Emmy or two. She’s decidedly not Dionne Warwick, though she is from New Jersey.

That is far too young r101.

I seriously don't get why people keep suggesting people in their 70s or 80s. The entire joke is the person is so old they can look at people dying at a normal age (ie 80) as "So Young".

R102, maybe we can come up with a new joke.

Kim Novak is campy and pushing 90

[quote][R102], maybe we can come up with a new joke

Good idea, because this is getting dumb. There aren’t that many actresses near-100 that people would even know who they are.

How about Lee Grant?

Helmut Berger

Too you, R106, and disputed age.

Too young, R106, and disputed age.

Olivia is going to be a tough act -- and broad -- to replace!

I'm tired of old hags ruling the roost. It's time we passed the torch to someone ageless.

Forget an actress, I want a goddess.

As if.

Somebody tell that nasty asshole person who started this thread thing that I am not available to play an "old bitchy cunt actress" even if there were any money in the gig. What shitting nerve. I know they have improved makeup techniques but I lack the mother fucking personality to be a "cunt," assholes. I am pure class and everybody knows it.

As a timeless contemporary artiste with my fingers on the retro pulse of the nation, I am re-leasing my new album on 8 track tape. Would Dead Olivia Fat-Face do that?

Shit.

[quote]maybe we can come up with a new joke.

Gurl, you must be new in these parts.

I'd like to nominate the ever-lovely and vivacious June Lockhart. She turned 95 last month. This Old Hollywood actress has a Tony and two stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and she appeared in such classic films as A Christmas Carol, Meet Me in St. Louis, and Sergeant York, as well as achieving true immortality as Lassie's mother and on Lost in Space. She is an avowed rock-and-roll goddess. According to Bill Mumy, the only photo she ever kept in her purse was of David Bowie -no pics of her children. She feuded with her Lost in Space costar, Jonathan Harris, who referred to her as Lady Macbeth, The Iron Butterfly, and The Ice Queen. She made disparaging comments about his sexuality. And she charges $300 for an autograph. Said one fan, "June Lockhart is a CUNT...with a capitol K !!"

I submit she has all the makings of a tru Datalounge Legend.

June Lockhart is still alive?

It strikes me, some 116 posts in, that we were pretty quick to acquiesce to the rules OP set out. I don't believe it was ever established that the actress had to be a bitch. Luise Rainer and Olivia weren't especially known for that, except here. So why are we restricting ourselves to that?

Cloris gets my vote. I've been watching 'The Facts of Life' on Roku TV, and she just joined the cast in S8 that I'm on. Not only does she act circles around the girls, but many of her line deliveries and body language are way beyond, "I'm an Oscar winner doing this just for the money." I believe she was around 60 at the time she took over for Charlotte Rae, and she still looked good and had quite the caboose!

Another vote for either Arlene Dahl or Rhonda Fleming. They're both 97 and were starring in movies as far back as the 1940's. (A star from that period should have been in OP's criteria). I guess Janis Paige, as well.

Look at R117 trying to cause trouble.

I wrote at R31:

[quote] I think the only requirements from OP's list should be: Old Award winning Cannot be Dionne Warwick, i.e., has to be a well-known actress

I also started the polls.

Lee Grant

Betty White, you bitches. She's fucking 98.

Glenn! Finally an award you can win!

Fuck sex. Another vote for Legend Norman Lloyd. Is all about the age,anyway.

I would agree that from an age perspective you can't beat Norman Lloyd. He is older than everyone else named.

Let’s throw out age and just go for cunty.

How about me, bitches? I turned 95 this summer

Is anyone looking for a 98-year-old French bitch?

How about a 90-year-old Finnish bitch?

Sophia Loren FTW! Peasants...

When did all these "rules" go into effect? I thought it just had to be the oldest celebrity you can think of?

Mamma Mia! I'll be your Italian, bitch. Screw Sophia

Sophia can cut you with her side eye.

I turn 90 in 2021 and I'm still a red hot mama!

How old is Doris Day?

Yeah but Mamie's not a cunt.

Doris Day is never going to be any older. Disqualified.

[quote] How old is Doris Day?

Her grave is a bit over a year old.

The actress does not have to be a cunt, just very old. Luise Rainer had a sweetness tinged with tartness that made her pronunciations of "So young" a tad biting. Olivia had an hauteur and reputation that was a sign of veiled cuntiness behind her beloved screen-legend persona that made her "So young" pronouncements like small daggers. We need someone with a similar bitterness.

Crawford and Davis are elder cunts, Babs and Jane are the old cunts and Meryl and Julia are the aging cunts. Jennifer Lawrence is the ingenue cunt.

All this hullabaloo on Vivian Vance's burfday. Classic DL!

I don't think it's necessary to find a new one, Olivia can be beatified and we may still invoke her as a saint of DL.

Betty is the perfect successor for a few reasons:

1) she’s old as dirt.

2) she’s not REALLY a bitch but she’s great (arguably no one better) with a passive aggressive bitchy line, kind of what we’re looking for here.

3) she has worked at some point with literally anyone and everyone and is known for outliving her Co-stars, and guest stars, bitches!

4) she’s the patron saint and last surviving member of DL’s most loved and obsessed over TV show.

The end.

I think R143 is onto something.

Angela Lansbury currently leading at 20.83 percent followed by Trans Norman Lloyd at 16.67 percent.

It should be Marsha Hunt. No one knew who Luise Rainer was till her fame was rekindled by her extreme old age. Marsha, at 102, fits the bill.

Oooh... What about Linda Hunt!

Stella Stevens!

Gina Lollobrigida just turned ninety-three.

I suppose she is mostly forgotten.

Olivia can be beatified by the caftan robed priests of DL, swinging Hermes bags of incense and she would be known as St. Olivia of Havilland, her holy image being a tiny cage with a woman in it. She can still be invoked in this manner in threads where necessary,

You hafta include Madge in this gambol thru fields of bitches. I just wish my ex-wife were eligible, but alas, she’s only made films, not acted. Btw there are whole categories on youtube dedicated to Madge’s colossal bitchiness. Besides, she stole a lot from gay cultcha, voguing, cross-dressing etc. As I’m sure u all know.

Runners-up: Shirley MacLaine, Leslie Caron: simply because if they could win parts away from Audrey Hepburn, who demanded her pick of sympathetic cinematographers, they must have been even more Kolossal Kunts than she was!

Surely, Ellen DeGeneres

Eva Marie Saint

Top picks:

Betty White

Sophia Loren

Joan Collins

Shirley MacLaine is certainly shaping up to be an Aging Goddess of the Kali variety.

Michelle Phillips

Angela Lansbury, if for no other reason that she said of the #metoo movement that if women dress like slappers they shouldn't be shocked if they get knocked down and raped.

Of course she claimed to be horribly misquoted.

Shirley Maclaine

Poor June Lockhart -Getting no love here... :(

Betty or Cloris. I voted Cloris.

Rita Tushingham

What’s Anna Maria Albergetti up to, I’m sure she could use the career boost?

Cletis Leachman is nothing but a TV actor. Same with Betty Shite.

You've all gone nuts, picking actresses in their 70s. I'm sticking with Norman Lloyd and you can't stop me. Nyah!

Be a sport and indulge us. How long can this state of affairs last? He's 105 years old! Then we can revert to Demi Moore or Quvenzhane Wallis or whoever you ultimately decide is old enough for the role.

R164, Cloris Leachman has an Oscar to go with her eight Emmys. and over eighty feature film credits (not counting any shorts or direct-to-video). She has also starred on Broadway. She doesn't get my vote for this New Official Old Bitchy Cunt Actress position, but she sure as hell cannot be dismissed as "nothing but a TV actor."

Cloris also saved The Facts of Life!

I always read those So Youngs! In Olivia’s drawn out voice.

[quote]She made disparaging comments about his sexuality.

She criticized him for being straight?

Is Debra Winger too young?

Yes, R170, by far. Even Shirley McClain is too young.

R169 -Jonathan Harris professed to be straight. He was married to one woman for decades. However, there has always been a lot of speculation about him. June Lockhart stated in an interview that she thought he was gay.

Fie on you for saying that Cloris is just a TV actress! How can you forget THIS?

[quote] How can you forget THIS?

We couldn't in part because we saw R97. In addition, I'm sure many on DL know she won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar.

R37 Does not qualify.

Cloris gets my vote.

I got to meet her at a reading! I attended with my lady pal. Cloris was pretty funny, but also a little hard of hearing. I presented her with an 8x10 from The Last Picture Show. She said something like, “Christ! People still watch that?!” She proceeded to sign the bottom left and right corners, then drew a dotted line down the middle. “When you two break up, you won’t have to fight over this.” My lady pal was not laughing, cause she wanted this gay dick so bad! She would get me drunk and try to....

Anyways, I vote for Cloris.

Cloris gets my vote.

I got to meet her at a reading! I attended with my lady pal. Cloris was pretty funny, but also a little hard of hearing. I presented her with an 8x10 from The Last Picture Show. She said something like, “Christ! People still watch that?!” She proceeded to sign the bottom left and right corners, then drew a dotted line down the middle. “When you two break up, you won’t have to fight over this.” My lady pal was not laughing, cause she wanted this gay dick so bad! She would get me drunk and try to....

Anyways, I vote for Cloris.

Great story, R176.

Great story, R177.

R177 were you a stunner?

I don’t look a day over 35.

r181, me neither

The "pole" is currently tied with Angela Lansbury and Betty White in the lead. Who will it be?

It’s not Shelley Hack!

Lee Grant!

Whomever it is you all settle on for this silly title will be dead before you queens make up your minds.

She is eternal

Barbara Rush, per this thread...hoping I can link DL to DL without being lost to a DL wormhole.

[quote] Stella Stevens!

Where am I? Who am I?

Cruella is the same age as Roger's wife, R187, who looks to be perhaps 30 or so. They were college roommates, at least in the original book.

I dare say it was all that clean living and fresh air.

S.hack

Jill Eikenberry