Advice on Tongue Cancer Please- Thread 3

Wow. I can't thank you enough for your support. I would have thought that most people would have stopped caring or following my situation. I don't talk to my friends or family about many of the issues I am facing, because I don't want to worry them, and there is nothing they can do about it, so it is nice to come here for some emotional support and kind words. Thank you.

Brian, Brian, Brian. Your situation has illuminated my own fears and truly pathetic attitude/weaknesses in life's most BASIC challenges..

I'm going through some life changes- potential job loss, money worries, etc. And I have been having severe anxiety and literally breaking down crying, daily,,

You have been an inspiration here- Your attitude is that of a soldier and I am humbled by your experience, attitude, courage, words, and life.

You are extremely strong and brave and you have truly reminded me of what being courageous means. You have been dealt a hand that I certainly could not handle.

You are a great guy and you are going to have many new and wonderful experiences and eventually, (like all of us) lifetimes. You have earned it. You are an inspiration to me and have are a great teacher.

Let's not forget to come up with clever DL-worthy names for the unnamed experimental drug OPB will begin taking soon!

I say, HELLO PEOPLE

I'm glad you're still here, Brian. I think your grace in this situation is remarkable. I think about you and wish I lived in TN so that I could help in some way. You are an inspiration to many of us. And I like your art, too!

No, R5. If you knew what it is like, you would NOT want to live in TN!!!! If I had not gotten sick, I would have moved by now.

And I'm sorry you are having struggles, R2. I have been there. I think almost all of us have. I think those who are most compassionate are those who have, at one point, needed the compassion. I know It is hard to stop worrying about the things you are dealing with, but I try to not worry about that which I can not change. I hope all the anxiety is for naught.

Hello Brian, I am happy to see you're still willing to fight with the experimental drug. We are all here for you.

Brian, how are you feeling physically?

Of course we're still following you Brian. I understand how sometimes it's difficult to talk to those close to you. Peace to all of us who are struggling.

R4 Are you the one who posted about your bird in the last thread? Either way, he’s gorgeous. Thanks for the pic! ❤️

Is cupcake really your official name, R8? I love that. SO sweet. I feel great. I do not feel any signs of cancer or residual chemo effect, other than one: my wounds do not heal quickly. If I get, say, a paper cut, it cold be open and hurting for weeks. cuts and bruises simply don't heal themselves like they did before, and it can be rather annoying, especially since I work with my hands. But I'm doing pretty well if that is the only symptom I have, considering they expected me to be dead by now !

R4 Love the bird. Very dignified!

R4 He really does look both regal AND sensitive. What a handsome bird.

I'm glad you're feeling ok, Brian. Did you start the new treatment?

So happy to hear you feel great Brian and that you can work! Creative people are treasures, and most of you don't get nearly enough credit for your endeavors. Your talent is all yours and something very special. PJ the African Grey sends his regards to all on your thread, and plans another picture to post in future, in another mood. x

R15 PJ needs his own thread. ❤️

Little black Bosch cat sends his love with his fur Uggs- no Jaundice, no gallstones, but a infection in the liver:

R17 What a beauty!

I'm sorry you lost your little dog recently Brian. PJ spreads his wings over you in love, no matter what you're thinking or doing. If we were close to you, I would bring him over in his hated travel cage for a chat and to maybe watch his favorite Three Stooges. You're probably busy painting anyway, don't ever stop. x

I'm thinking of you, too, Brian. Went in search of this thread so I could continue to offer my support. I'm glad to hear your feeling well.

Too funny. I saved Brian's website in my favorites, and a few times when I am not looking at my keyboard and I press wrong buttons, ect, it brings Brian's website on my screen. This has happened twice...

Thinking of you Brian!!!

Hey Brian I hope you're okay.

Thinking of you, Brian.

How are you feeling, Brian?

Sending you good vibes and wishes from NYC Brian!

Brian, so happy to hear from you and that you are doing well.

Brian, I hope you see this. I see you're in TN, so am I. I'm currently taking care of my mom who is getting in-home hospice, albeit different circumstances, and lost my dad to cancer, so I can be of any support.

Somebody mentioned a website and I haven't found a link. Can anyone link it, please?

Here you go, R27.

Brian does paintings of pets, if you send him a pic of yours he might paint it (he did that for someone here anyway.)

OPB here. I've been taking the experimental drug, and have not had any unmanageable side effects. I wont know if it is working for another month or two. The good news is I just booked a flight to London for next month. I have been anxious about going, which is not like me. I used to travel all the time, and don't ever really get anxious about anything, which is why I decided to go. I can't let fear rule what is left of my life. I'm looking forward to going. And, as always, thank you for the kind works and thoughts. It is so amazingly uplifting.

R28, thank you.

Thank you for the update, Brian. I'm so glad you're okay, I was getting worried. A trip to London sounds like a great idea!

Hope you have a lovely time, Brian.

Have a wonderful trip. Brian!

Hi, Brian. Good for you going to London. It's one of my all-time favorite cities. Thanks to whomever provided the link to your paintings. They're fantastic. You certainly have had an extraordinary life. And you've helped so many people here. You should feel proud of that. If you run into Boris Johnson, pinch his cock. What do you have to lose?

Glad the trial is going ok. Have a wonderful trip, Brian!

Thank you to the poster of the link, what wonderful paintings, you are very talented, Brian.

Sending you love, Brian. Thank you for letting into your life. xoxo

I am so happy that you're going to London in it's holiday finery- let us know if you need any recs.

Brian, I love your paintings. London sounds fun - I hope you have a wonderful time!

Thumbs up on the London trip Brian! I love it there this time of year, or any time really. I am going to Paris, so I will skip a stone across the Channel to you. Meanwhile, PJ is going to birdie boarding, where he will languish with 7 or 8 others of various species, and return home talking like all of them.

Do you need a hotel recommendation? I know an excellent modern overpriced one if you do. Bon Voyage Brian!

OPB. I could always use some London recommendations! I tend to be an intrepid traveler, and just meander about without any grand scheme. I lived in London and have been there many times, so have no need or desire to visit the typical tourist spots like the Tower or Buck Palace, et al, although I used to work at Harrods, so will probably stop in for old time's sake. The only thing on my must-see list is the Tate Modern. Otherwise? I will just wander around various neighborhoods. I would love to see some theater while I'm there, but the West End seems to be more overrun with jukebox musicals and family theater than Broadway right now. I'm sure I can find something worth seeing, though. I know I will have trouble eating, because I can only eat food that has been pureed. I'm hoping to find a sympathetic restaurant and chef who doesn't mind sticking whatever he/she makes in a blender in order for me to eat it. I'm looking forward to the trip, and to any recommendations someone might have. Thank you!

I haven't been to London for many years, OPB, so have no recommendations beyond the Tate. Perhaps you can enjoy afternoon tea in a quaint place with a lovely pudding.

Have a wonderful time, and continue to feel well. I visited your website, you are a fabulous artist and an inspiration.

So glad you are going to the Tate Modern. Seeing Cy Twombly's Four Seasons hung together was one of the best artistic experiences of my life. I hope you enjoy it as well. Safe travels.

OPB, how about the National Gallery in London? Admission is free. Here is a link to some of their must-sees, which include Van Gogh's "Sunflowers," Seurat's "Bathers," and Van Eyck's "Arnolfini Portrait."

There's also the National Portrait Gallery (London), admission free as well.

I've been to both museums and did not regret spending my limited time in London at those 2 museums.

Love London! You can literally lose yourself in that city there's so much to do and see! Any good gigs at Albert Hall? Magnificent building that is. Bon Voyage Brian!

Take a look at the Nadler Hotel, a local chain in Kensington, Covent Garden and Soho (the last my favorite and the best located). I like it because the rooms have kitchenettes, and the service is good. It's the kind of place that should be able to help you with your concerns; give them an email and discuss. The Soho one has relationships with some of the many local restaurants. (Get a room bigger than standard double, if you can)

This is just a suggestion Brian. It might be out of your budget, so whatever you need I will help you find it. If you wish I can contact you through your website. So exciting!

Edvard -- I've booked my flight, but not my hotel yet. The Nadler looks great; I was unfamiliar with the chain. I was thinking of staying in the West End area, so the one in Soho looks fantastic, and is reasonably priced. I would love to stay at the W in Leicester Square, but that might be a bit much. Thank you for the suggestion.

Enjoy OPB! Have a safe flight and trip!

Going to London, that's wonderful OPB. If you do get to the Tate Modern, could you do me a favor and say Hello to the Rothko paintings he willed to them.

I will never see a Rothko in person but maybe I can experience it vacariously.

Is your lodging sorted Brian? As for getting into town, I recommend ExclusiveAirports car service, approx £50 each way, so you don't have to schlep your cases up and diwn the Tube.

Keep us posted if you can. x

I don't know when you're going to London OPB, but if you're going after Thanksgiving, give the sentimental "A Christmas Carol" at the Old Vic a try:

Christmas in London, it’ll be like something out of Dickens!

OP Brian - Here's a handy link to November Tatler featuring entertainment listings such as Sleeping Beauty at the Royal Opera House.

Stay strong, Brian. My household has also been touched by tongue cancer in the past. Best wishes to you.

OPB here. Thanks everyone for the awesome recommendations. I would not have thought to see what was on at the Royal Academy of Arts -- I would be more likely to have stuck to the Tate and the National Portrait Gallery -- but I would love to see an exhibit of Freud's art. Thanks for the heads up. And Sleeping Beauty! I used to see world class ballet when I lived in NYC, but Nashville doesn't have much, so Sleeping Beauty sounds lovely. I will be there mid-November, so most of the Christmas decorations will be up, which will be wondrous. I never get tired of seeing holiday displays.

I still haven't booked my room. I can use points on IHG or Marriott, so I might just stay at one of their hotels. The Kimpton looks fantastic, but not exactly in the area I would prefer to stay in. The Intercontinental Park Lane seems better-located, but a bit stuffy. This is an odd time for traveling so I'm guessing I will have options on where to stay.

I suspect this trip might do my body in a bit, since it will require a lot more energy than I have used in a while. Friends have advised against going because they fear I might be too susceptible to germs, etc, since the chemo compromises my immune system, but I don't care. What else is life but a series of adventures, some that work out, and some that don't? I've never been afraid to do something before, and I am not about to start now. I would rather just check out now than be worried about trying to get the most of the time I have left. Granted, this trip might shorten the time I have left, but I'm ok with that.

Thank you all for your wonderful support and encouragement.

OPB, I hope you have a fabulous trip! So glad to hear you're in good spirits, heading to London, and grabbing life by the short and curlies.

Likewise, I hope the new treatment helps kick your cancer's ass. :-)

Wonderful to hear from you OP, bring face mask to protect from germs esp on the plane. Enjoy London!

Mayfair has wonderful Christmas decorations as Brian alluded to. Here's a sampling. Enjoy London Brian!

Hey OP Brian. Are you back from London?

OPB here. Thanks for bumping the thread, R58! I got back from London last Thursday, and had a wonderful time. It was unseasonably cold, so I didn't walk around to see as many Christmas decorations as I would have liked to have seen, but it was still a wonderful trip.

I have a follow-up scan this Friday, and will find out if the experimental drug is working. If it is, great! If not, well, I am ok with that too. Fingers crossed that it is working.

Glad you enjoyed your trip, Brian! Thinking of you extra hard this week.

So glad your trip was a success!

R59 It sounds like your trial drug doesn’t have many side effects, Brian. Yay!

My fingers are crossed too.

Good to hear OPB. When you can, perhaps you can describe your travels?

So glad you were able to visit London. Let’s hope the trial drug is working - fingers crossed!

we are here for you !

Fingers crossed, Brian.

Welcome home, OPB. Wishing you and yours a lovely Thanksgiving, and wonderful news from Friday's scans to give additional thanks for.

Brian, I'm so happy you enjoyed your time in London! I hope for good news regarding your trial drug.

Yay! Glad you had a great time, OPB! All the best to you and good luck on Friday!

Glad to hear you had a fab trip OPB! I'm sending you good vibes for Friday.

Have a great thanksgiving OPB and to everyone in this thread from NYC.

Yay Brian, I'm so glad you did your trip! Thank you for your chronicle of sorts. Did you take some fabulous pictures?

How are you doing OPB?

Oh yay!! I'm so glad you had a nice trip to London! Hoping you have scan results back soon and they show good news!

Thinking of you for tomorrow Brian. Hope it goes well and that you had a peaceful Thanksgiving.

OPB here. It turns out the experimental drug is not working, so they stopped it. They are putting me on immunotherapy. I had it before the surgery, and it was ineffective then, so I don't expect it to do much of anything now, although, I suppose it is better than nothing. They said that it is most likely that in a few months, the tumor in my chest will move or grow in such a way as to constrict blood-flow, putting me to sleep right away, and killing me within ten minutes. That sounds like the ideal way to go, unless, of course, I am driving! I also have barbiturates -- Nembutal -- which I will use to euthanize myself if the pain becomes unbearable before the tumor does its work, or I get pneumonia from aspirating. At any rate, at least now I know for certainty what I am dealing with, and I am more than ok with it. I didn't expect to be facing something like this so soon, but this is as good a time as any. We will all get there, eventually. Thank you for your kind words and thoughts. They mean a lot.

OPB, you are a good person. You’ve given the world art, and are leaving the world a better place because of that. I wish you joy, peace and friendship until your time comes, which honestly is the best we can wish for anyone, now that I think about it. We will all get there, is right.

Brian, you've had several months to think about this. My mom died of cancer when she was 65. (It was approximately a year between diagnosis and her death.) She predeceased her mother (my grandmother). In a way, I envy my mom. She didn't have to grow super old like my grandmother. She had time to put her affairs in order, etc.

I hope you keep on posting, if you're up to it. Your experience is something we all can learn from. Lots of love.

OPB no matter what they say I can't help but hoping something will work. You seem like such a kind, creative, sweet man. If I get to be half as dignified as you are when my time comes, I'll be very glad.

OPB, you are so brave. Thank you for letting us share your journey, you are a very kind soul and please haunt some of our dreams so we know if there is an afterlife when the time comes...

Please take care and we love you very much!

I'm just a follower of this thread and I'm devastated over your last post. I'm not a believer in deities but I wish I was. I'd willingly bruise my knees on your behalf. Many of us will never forget you.

Thank you, Brian. You are loved.

Oh Brian, that is crushing to hear. I don't know if the doctors added (I'm being morbid here, but this is how my father died) that you can also die from a heart attack if you don't get enough oxygen- your heart works overtime to get more oxygen in the system. Did they mention going on oxygen at all when the tumor gets bigger?

OPB, I was so sorry to read the latest news. I have been following your journey from the beginning, and thanks to your posts I found your lovely, whimsical art on Facebook. Your kindness shines through in your work - a wonderful legacy. You are leaving the world - and our little world here on DL - a better place.

Please keep posting if you can, we are here for you!

Sending lots of love to you, Brian. You’re a good guy. I know it seems you’re alone in this, and perhaps you are in a way. But in another way, you are loved and cared for by many. I hope things go easily for you whatever happens.

Brian, I am so sorry to hear that. Every time I saw there were new messages in this thread, I dreaded opening it up. But you sound like a wonderful human being and I feel I've come to care about you, so I needed to know. Thank you for sharing this experience with us. In the grand scheme of things, we will all be joining you in the blink of an eye.

Sending you love.

Brian, you are so much stronger than any of us. Please know we are here if you need us. Love you.

Hi Brian, thinking of you. Sending positive vibes.

Brian you will always be on my mind, keep us informed as to how you are doing.

I've tried to avoid this thread because of an ex. She died of ovarian cancer. She was an incredible woman in so many aspects of her life. While dealing with her cancer she still took the time to see me in the hospital. Brian, my heart aches for you, but strangely you have given comfort to those that have posted here. It sounds so cliche, but you are truly an inspiration. Whatever this leads I can only hope you are surrounded by those you love. May peace come swiftly with no regrets.

OPB here, You are all too kind.

I have been off of chemo and the trial drug for a few weeks, and I feel better. When you're on chemo, your brain gets fuzzy so slowly that you don't realize it until you're off of it, and start to think more clearly. Also, your skin gets in credibly dry and cracked, especially your fingers. There was a period when I had to wear gloves because it hurt too much to use my fingers. That is better now, too, thankfully. A friend is here this week from LA. She's a songwriter who sometimes comes to Nashville to write. She's had this trip planned for months and months, and I really did not expect to be alive when she got here. I'm surprised and happy that she is here, and I look forward to seeing her. Thanks again for all the kind words and thoughts. For the time being, I am still feeling great.

OPB, it's nice to learn that you're feeling great and have an entertaining week ahead with your friend.

Before things get too busy, I would like to wish you (and everyone on this thread) a wonderful holiday season.

Thanks so much for sharing. Trying to aid my brother who is 44 was diagnosed with metastic liver cancer months ago and has just been given similar news. I don’t know how to understand what he is going through - and your description has been helpful in understanding. He seems so much more bitter and angry than you. Understandably having 4 kids 8-17 contributes, but I want to help him attain peace and I don’t know how to support - and feel sometimes I’m intruding on his time by wanting to spend time with him.

Hope that you are able to enjoy every day deeply and that your time is relatively pain free. Thanks again for the incredibly valuable sharing that has allowed me to understand what it’s like - both for my loved ones and for when my time comes.

Have a nice time with your friend OPB. I visit my neighbor who is ill with stomach c. We are not old friends but I am very fond of her and bring her some chicken soup from my grandsonmother's recipe....here's a virtual bowl for you too Brian, love you and your sweet ways.

Thanks for updating, Brian. Glad to hear that you're feeling good.

Brian so thankful you posted. It's always nice to read your updates. You're a very special person, though it might sound trite, I really mean that. Please let us know how your visit goes.

Brian, thank you for sharing your experiences. Mortality is both the most awesome mystery and greatest certainty. Whenever someone shares any illumination on the subject we are all very grateful and better prepared for our own. Your posts are a selfless gift. Thank you. Peace for the season.

Hey, Brian. Hope you're doing well. Just wanted to say we think about you often.

wishing you peace lovely Brian

Dear Brian, I am SO happy to hear your cozy friend came for a visit. Please let us know how it went when you feel up to it.

Sending love your way,

Keep on keeping on Brian. Glad you are feeling better, and hope you have an enjoyable visit with your friend.

Hi Brian!

It seems to me you are handling this situation with great grace. Of course parts of it are awkward and awful. But think back to when you first posted. In that time, you have become so much braver and dare I say, a stronger and better person.

What has happened is not your fault, and all you can do is deal with it as it is. But you have done it so well. I hope you enjoy your friend and your holiday. God bless.

Hi Brian, here's hoping your Christmas/Hanukkah/non denominational holidays give you some cheer. xoxo

Hi Brian, hope you have a lovely, peaceful Christmas Eve and Christmas. ❤️💚

Sending love for you on Christmas eve eve Brian.

Happy Holidays to you Brian !

And to everyone in this thread, have a safe and wonderful holiday season.

Merry Christmas, Brian!

Merry Christmas to you, OPB, and to everyone in this thread. :-)

Happiest holidays Brian. And I hope somehow we can have many more.

OPB here. thank you for all the greetings. I hope everyone has a fantastic holiday.

Glad to hear from you, Brian! Happy holidays!

Happy Holidays Brian hope you have fun.

Brian, I absolutely love your new paintings...the England-themed works...and the dinosaurs!

Love to you at Christmas, Brian. And to everyone else on this thread.

Love you, Brian. Happy Holidays.

Here is a link to Brian's art on IG, please follow him!

Merry Christmas everyone!

Here’s the original WPIX Yule Log.

Here’s the modern, HD, no music, crackling fire version.

OPB here. That was sweet of you to link my IG, R115. Thank you, and Happy Holidays to all. B

Warm wishes on this day OP Brian. I posted on the other thread (London Suggestions?) yesterday and found it kind of strange no one posted afterwards. Glad someone started this new thread. I posted this link to a 2015 British Sainsbury ad which I thought might bring you back to your UK trip for a few moments. Enjoy "Mogg's Christmas Calamity! "

Hey r2 - OT but I had to comment. I went through what you are going through in 2015 for a period of 2 years. It was a difficult time but I got through it. Long story short, I wound up in a new field of work, new career, more suited to my talents. If someone had told me (during the bleakest time) that this would happen and to keep my spirits up I would have told them where to go. So I say to you the same thing that was told to me: Do not give up. Hang in there. Explore everything, make connections, phone people, just get out there. You can and you will do it!

r120

Thank you for the wishes OPB -- same to you!

Merry Christmas from London, Brian.

Happy Holidays Brian. Also, to all the Dlers who care too.

Thinking of you Brian.

Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!

OP, I just discovered your art works. To say that I love them would be an understatement. Stay positive. Praying for you!

Aw, thank you R127.

OPB here. I hope everyone here is having the best holiday, and that the next year is filled with love, peace, and happiness. I just did something very irresponsible, and I feel a little guilty about it. I booked another flight for London, for March. I did not have the time or health to do everything I wanted to do when I was there last month, and didn't get it all out of my system. Then when I read that the Tate Modern was hosting the first UK Warhol exhibit in over 20 years, I knew I had to go back. His art influences me more than any other artist, and I have never seen more than a small handful of his paintings in person. So...I spent a considerable amount of time searching for cheap fares. I flew business and first class the last time I went, but this time I will fly the cheapest coach seat they have. I'm aware that the experience will be markedly different, but I can not spring for a top ticket now. Being sick is expensive!!!! I know it is irresponsible to go back so soon after the last trip, but, perhaps, I am betting on myself by thinking I will still be healthy enough to travel in March, There is more than a good chance that I won't even believe alive then, but planning a trip gives me a goal. I also feel terribly guilty about taking a trip to London, and not going to Boston to see my mother. I saw her -- and my sister -- at my sister's cape house a few months ago, and I felt like we said our goodbyes then. Saying goodbye to someone you know you will never see again must be miserable. When I said goodbye to her at the Cape, we thought I might be swinging through Boston again, so there was no finality to it. I don't know if I can take saying goodbye to my mother again, because the next time WOULD be the last time I would see her. I love my mom more than anything, and it would kill me to see her sad. My sister will come down to Nashville again shortly before I die to help figure out what to do with all my stuff, and my art, and will take my two cats. That will be hard enough, because one the cats are gone, I will have no more responsibility. I will miss them, but they will love my sister. As for hotels, Im debating between the Nadler Soho or the Strand Palace. Both seem reasonably priced and well located. I loved the Kimpton, where I stayed before, but the room was way too small. Any other thoughts on decent hotels in Covent Garden area? Thank you for being on this journey with me, and making it more bearable . And happy new year to you all.

Hi Brian, I looked at your Instagram posts and I can see the Warhol influence. Your paintings are full of color and life. Also, I'm betting you are a fan of Wayne Thiebaud as well.

Please don't feel guilty about planning a second trip to London. If not now, when? I hope others will chime in with hotel recommendations for Covent Garden.

Happy New Year & lots of love.

Having another trip to London to look forward to seems like the best "medicine" you can give yourself. Does your mom travel well? Maybe she could join you and together you could share a grand adventure rather than a sad good-bye.

Wishing you and your loved ones a Happy New Year, OPB.

OPB, now is the time to do whatever you want to do! It sounds like London is calling. Go!

Yeaaaaah new England trip! And a Warhol exhibit? This is a great idea, Brian, don't feel guilty.

May the new year bring you love, peace, wonder and adventure. Love you, Brian.

OPB The trip sounds wonderful I love Warhols art too I remember seeing him in the clubs on 14th st in NY. Have a wonderful trip it may be the medicine you really need, good wishes for the new year.

Seeing his large Mao at the Met sometime in the 80s changed my life. Scale is everything.

Happy New Year to you OPB and everyone on this thread.

I don't have any recommendations on hotels but if you can, you should fly business class. You can actually rest and sleep on those comfy chairs. I've flown on economy in the past and it's just too cramp for me to get any rest at all. (i'm 6 foot 2). Or maybe go economy but pay for the seat by the exit. that's what I would do.

All the best to you and thank you for everything!

Springtime in London - Can't think of a better time, or a better place, OP Brian. Crazy thought: Would be cool to see a "video" of your trip and see clips from museums with your unedited funny, insightful, and personal commentary (?). Okay, maybe not a great idea.

R130. You're the first person to notice my love of Thiebaud. He is surprisingly not as well known as you would think, and most people don't seem to know him. Yes, he is a huge influence on me. And, alas, my mom is too old to travel abroad -- she's 84 -- and about to have a hip replacement, so she will not be able to meet me there. My sister wants to meet me there, but I do prefer to travel alone. That is especially a priority for me now, because my energy flags suddenly, and I don't want to feel that I am dragging anyone down, and I know I will. It is easier and more enjoyable for me to just follow me feet when and where I want to, and not worry about trying to keep up with someone. I've been a solo traveler all my life. I've even gone to places as far-off as St Petersburg and Hong Kong by myself. I love it. I'm looking forward to going! Happy new year, everyone.

Hello Brian

London’s calling - so go !

The Strand Palace is very central but not as luxurious as it may sound. Most central London hotel rooms are pretty small, compared to what you may be used to in America. You could maybe try the Russell Hotel but that’s a conversion from a grand Victorian hotel, and again, rooms pretty small.

For eating, I noticed last time Rules was full - do make a reservation and explain your requirements. They will be happy to help. It’s fabulous.

The only places I can think of with bigger rooms as standard are further out. I would be tempted to ring and explain it’s your final trip, and see if they have a larger room available. But that may very well not be your style, so many apologies if you find the suggestion tasteless.

Good luck!

And Happy New Year. I am an avid solo traveller too. :)

Totally agree on traveling solo. Only way to go. Can you use credit cards to upgrade? Maybe even move it up to February - though it’s cold.

R139. I had a feeling that the Strand Palace might be a little on the seedy side. The price is too reasonable for such a prime location. The Russell Hotel is now called the Kimpton, which is where I stayed the last time. I loved it, although the room was so small, and the one reading chair in the room was incredibly uncomfortable. And, R141, I can't move the trip to February, because the Warhol exhibit doesn't start until mid-March.

Hi Brian! I know exactly what you’re saying about an art exhibit being life-changing. I booked a trip to Chicago to see the Van Gogh exhibit at the Art Institute years ago and it was one of the best experiences of my life. Do NOT feel guilty about your return trip to London, in fact go back every damn month if you want to!

Hope you have another wonderful trip. 😥

^^that was supposed to be a damn ❤️ emoji, not a sad one!

Wishing you the happiest New Year ever, Brian.

Happy New Year Brian!

I think it is fabulous that you are going to London, yet again. You enjoyed yourself. Why guilt, just have some fun!

We just stayed here in December and it was lovely. We were upgraded to a larger room, so I can't say if the standard rooms are comfortably sized or not.

I am so pleased to hear about your trip, that's fantastic news. Nadler Soho has the best location for you Brian, they don't call the area the beating heart of London for nothing. You get a good discount for advance payment, aim for a Superior Double. Are you going to the theatre? Blithe Spirit with Jennifer Saunders opens early March.

OPB, so happy that you're going back to London! There's nothing like it. I have a question about your kitties leaving with your sister when the time comes. Could they not stay with you through it all so you don't have to be without them before you have to go? xxoo

Brian, I was curious.... I hope you don't mind me asking but I think your insight would be helpful...

Did you get cancer from Oral HPV? Or were you a smoker?

And what was the early symptom that made you think something was off?

OPB here, R150. My cancer was not HPV, and I've never smoked even one cigarette in my life. It was completely random that I got tongue cancer, and the doctors have no idea how I got it. They think it could have been a virus that just transmuted to cancer, but they don't know. About 1 1/2 years ago, I noticed that my tongue started to hurt when I ate. It felt like I had bitten my tongue, and I assumed that it would go away. When it persisted after a number of weeks, I went to a doctor to find out why. I ended up going to three different doctors over the course of months, because each one misdiagnosed the sore -- one even thought it was an ulcer caused by eating too many tomatoes -- and it did not get better, despite the treatment they recommended. I finally went to an oral surgeon and insisted on a biopsy, which came back positive for cancer. It was about 7 months from my noticing the pain til surgery. Chemo did not work, so I am now on immunotherapy. The side effects are negligible compared to chemo, but I don't expect it to get me that much more time. I feel great now, even though I should have been dead months ago. Whatever time I have left is more than I thought I would have.

Hi Brian. Eldergay here. All my friends died in the 80s and 90s. I don't mean that to minimize your experience. Quite the opposite. Your graceful, positive attitude exemplifies the best of us. You are a blessing. I am better to have known you even if it is over an anonymous chat site on the internet. Thank you for showing us the way.

Thank you, R152. What a nice thing to say.

Hello Brian- do not feel guilty. Art is what makes us human. And if it inspires you to live like you do (you’re one of the most gracious, gentle, classy people that I have encountered in this crazy world), do it with no remorse. All I can add is to ask for a bulkhead seat (or pay premium economy)- there is more legroom in bulkhead- and maybe you can FaceTime with your mother and sister whilst you’re in London?

I'm the kind supporter you don't really need. But I can't help but cry a bit. I'm still pulling for immunotherapy to keep you with us and happy too.

Sorry, wrong thread.

I’ve been following your Instagram, OPB, and I’m endlessly entertained by your cheerful art.

Hope you had a nice weekend.

How are you doing, Brian? We think about you often. Please check in.

Hi Brian! How are you doing?

OPB here. Thank you all for keeping this threat alive, and for your concern. Because I am off chemo and the trial drug, I feel the best I have felt in a long time. I'm not tired. I don't have that awful dry skin and rash. And I don't have that fuzzy "chemo brain." I feel great, which is rather ironic, because the tumors continue to grow, so I'm actually less healthy that I've ever been. For the time being, though, I really do feel great. I don't know at which point the cancer will start to compromise my ability to live my life -- and how quickly -- so I'm just taking it one day at a time. I should have been dead MONTHS ago, so every day is more than I thought I would have. Thank you all, and I hope your weekend is fantastic.

Good to know you're feeling well, OP. How are your London plans coming? Have you sorted it all out?

Hi OPB! It’s nice to hear from you.

Hi OPB - Great to hear your news! And I second that - any details about London trip? I think you had to go before March or something like that.

Probably the best thread on DL. Shows the best in us.

OPB here again. I bought my ticket for London for mid-March, which is when the Warhol exhibit opens at the Tate Modern. I'm looking forward to it. I haven't booked a room, yet. I would love to stay at the Hotel Cafe Royal, but it is so expensive! Someone upstream suggested the Nadler Soho, and that seems like a more realistic choice, although it isn't quite as grand. Not that I have any regrets, but I do wish I had spent more time in London over the last few years. It is my favorite city in the world.

My absolute favourite city as well, OPBrian. I worked there as a student in university one summer (lived in Bayswater, would get off at Fulham tube stop to get to work) and have fond memories of Hyde Park, the Serpentine, Soho theatre (saw Tommy the musical) and..... lots and lots of rain. Never saw so much rain in the summer. I saw the Police when they first came out with Roxanne hit. Good Times.

Thanks for checking in OPB. Glad to hear you're feeling good. Looking forward to hearing your adventures in London.

This is a morbid question OPBrian, but, based on your post, who is going to notify us on your passing?

Have fun in London. I think this is a very good decision to go to London again. Hope a great hotel pops up for you.

You deserve this, OPB!

That is not a morbid question, R168. I was just thinking about that this morning, oddly enough. You all have been so wonderful and kind and supportive, I would like someone to let you know what happens to me, when it happens to me. I'm also trying to figure out how to let my sister and friends know when I do die. The doctors expect a chest tumor to shift slightly and cut off circulation, and I will be dead in an instant. Tumor growth and movement is unpredictable, so it could be tomorrow, but they think it could be months. Who knows? It is entirely possible that I don't get back to London, but I hope I do. I suppose that if you don't hear form me in a while, that means I have died. In the meantime, again, your encouragement.

R170 Can this tumor be treated with gamma knife, stereotactic radiation or any number of other new treatments available? Have you checked into any of this, Brian?

Brian, I hope that day doesn't come for a long time. But when it does, it will be sad for us to realize what has happened, and you will be missed.

Well, shit, OPB, I am sorry to hear that your immunotherapy drug did not work, but glad that you are feeling well and doing as you wish with the rest of your life. I'd go for the Hotel Cafe Royal if I were you!

I know you are probably not interested in this, as is your right, but in the event you should change your mind and want to try something else, I, too, am a metastatic cancer patient and know of various resources one can use for finding appropriate clinical trials. (Some of the people in my cancer "community" have done several trials, with varying degrees of success.) Would be happy to post info here (or not).

Re your death, perhaps you could arrange for someone to post the info on your website and we could check there? (And thus you could avoid exposing an innocent person to the horrors of DL!)

Brian did you contact Mayo Clinic in Minnesota? They're world renowned for difficult cases. I went there 10 years ago because my doctors here in California thought I had pancreatic cancer. It's a very interesting place. Tests everyday in an assembly line type process. They keep track of your itinerary and hand you an updated one every time you check in for a test. They arrange transportation for you across town if you have an appointment at their other campus. The doctors work in teams so more than one specialist is on your case. My doctor told me to that the Minnesota clinic was the best of all Mayo hospitals. (I think they are in 4 states.)

So many well meaning people here with the "yes, but have you tried. X?", "don't give up, what about Y?" posts, but I doubt there is anything under the sun that OPB hasn't heard of, if not tried. He made his decision some time ago, so why can't everyone just throw their support behind how he is choosing to live? He says he is happy and feels great. What more can one ask for in life?

Sounds like when he does go it will be short and relatively peaceful. That’s what I wish for myself.

Brian, you are loved and respected. If you are truly even 1/8 as truly and classy and dignified (and BRAVE) as your posts suggest- you are a patron saint of DL forever.

You will never be forgotten by me.

To quote my most treasured musical artist (MARY!)......

The waves have come to walk with you

To where you will live in the land of you

Land of you

You will not ever be forgotten by me

In the procession of the mighty stars

Your name is sung and tattooed now on my heart

Here I will carry, carry, carry you

Here I will carry, carry, carry you

Forever.

Brian, this last year has been really hard for me, drama with my family, health issues and broke up with my best friend. I pretty much have felt like giving up on the human race.

You have been a reminder to me that there are still good hearted people in the world. People with some grace and humor about them. I may having a hard time finding them right now, but you have reminded me that they’re still out there. Thank you for that.

R177, well, that was beautiful. First time posting on this thread (but followed it from the beginning). OPB, thanks for being a light in this world.

OPB I’ll plant a tree for you and it will remind me of you.

I hope you get to visit London OPB and have an absolute blast. I hope you prove your doctors wrong and live a good long life, but if not you go with a smile on your lips and a G&T in your hands. xxx

YES R181!!!!!!!!!!! I want Brian to visit London again! With perfect health, joy, and peace!!!

Brian, PLEASE make it to London. Promise me. AND NOT some bullshit trip in misery and health issues and worry.

I see you in London in PEACE, JOY, PERFECT HEALTH, ABUNDANCE, and LOVE. Mr. OPB!!!!! (London is my dream city, like A Christmas Carol PERFECTION)

To the divine universe, creator of all that is- May Brian- Mr. OPB (in my limited perception of this divine being) make it to London, under grace, in perfect ways. May he reach London, and enjoy London +in and under+ the most divine grace and peace that anyone has ever known. May this being be bathed in the most wonderful divine light forever and always. He has given me so much faith and hope. He is my brother in eternity. May he always be under your divine protection. Archangel Michael, please watch over Brian. Saint Germain, may your divine violet flame wash Brian in your divine and protective light, may he always be protected and loved.

Brian. It is all set. I have seen to this. Motherfucker, you are going to London. IN perfect health. It is done. And I am buying one of your fucking paintings. And FUCK some chest tumor shifting and all that shit. It will shift after London. At the perfect time and not a moment before.

It is done. XOXOXOOXOXOXOOXOXOXXOXOXOX

So mote it be.

[quote] I'm also trying to figure out how to let my sister and friends know when I do die.

You never heard of an emergency contacts list?!? One in your wallet, one posted in your home, even one on your phone. Hospitals, cops, first responders, etc., all know to look for this. Who's your executor? Give them a list of friends and others that would appreciate notification. Every single old person I know does this, same for those with medical issues.

You have blessed us with your life. You deserve to go to London. You deserve to do anything you want too.

OPB here. R148 -- yes, I have a card in my wallet with contact information, and a do not resuscitate order. What I meant, though, is how will anyone know when I'm dead? I live alone, have a fairly solitary life, and can go days and days without texting or communicating with anyone. (Because my articulation is not great and it is hard to talk on the phone, the only person I ever actually call is my mother, because, although she has a smart phone, NEVER turns it on. She pretends to understand what I'm saying, but it is clear that she does not. That's ok; I know she just likes to hear my voice.) My sister is my executor, and I sent her a copy of all the necessary legal paperwork.

And, to the poster upstream: I should have been clearer...I have gone through rounds of chemo, radiation, and a new trial drug -- I was the first person at Vanderbilt Hospital's trial to get it! -- but none of it worked. I am currently on immunotherapy, but I do not expect much from it, because I tried that BEFORE surgery, and it didn't have an effect. I am taking it again now, though, mostly to give my family some peace that I have tried everything. I don't want them to think "what if..." My sister has a doctor friend ad Dana-Faber -- a leading cancer hospital in Boston -- and she tried to convince me to go there for more treatment, but I wouldn't do it. It would have meant completely uprooting my life and moving to a city where I don't have a life, and the stress of that would be more than I want right now. I don't like living in Nashville at all, but I love my loft, and it is easy to live here. As much as I love Boston, it is not an easy city to live in. Plus, I am at peace that this is terminal. What would be the point of fighting it? I accept my fate.

And, as always, thank you for your support and encouragement and humanity. I express things on here that I don't with friends and family, because I don't want to worry them, or make them have to deal with what I'm going through. You are all treasures. Thank you

Thank you OPB, r186. Thanks for your honesty and patience responding to all these questions. It is because many of us care so it is out of concern, not to create "waves" at your end. Agree - if you feel at peace in Nashville, and at peace with the potential finality, then that is all that matters. I don't know if we are all "treasures" (speaking for myself here) lol but we do try! lol

Brian, please get into a check-in habit with someone, maybe your sister, where you text at set times just so she knows what's up. Even a "still here" at 8 am & 5pm (or whenever) set your phone reminders for those times and make sure you send that text. If you miss one, she will know she has to set something in motion if she doesn't hear from you in x number of hours. If I remember, you have a pet? Maybe call care.com if you don't have a neighbor who you trust with your key, and set up an account, give your sister that info, and find a place to leave a key. If I'm mistaken and you dont have a pet, everything else is still valid. Don't let the unsurety of whether you are ok or not keep your sister up at night, just set up a routine. So glad you are going back to London, hope you get to enjoy everything you want, formats long as you want.

I think any single person over a certain age has some of the same concerns as OPB. How would someone know if he/she died? I did a google search, and there are services which are simply "check in" services. I'm not advocating for the one I'm linking, I'm just linking it to show an example of such a service. It sounds as though they call at a certain time of day, and you don't even have to talk to anyone, you just pick up the phone and press a 1. If no one answers, they call back a few times that day, and then notify a person you have designated to go over and physically check on you. If it's not too expensive, and it would give you some additional peace of mind, OPB, I'd think a service like that might be well worth it .

R[189] thank you. Sounds like a good service.

R189. I didn't know such services existed. That is a brilliant idea. Thank you. I do have two cats, R188, but my sister will take them soon. THAT is stressing me out more than anything! They were both feral adults when I found them living in a restaurant dumpster, and, although they have finally come around and are affectionate with me, they are both very wary of everyone else. I feel like I have let them down, since my responsibility and my implicit agreement with them is that I would take care of them, always. I know it is stupid to worry about pets considering what is going on with me, but...I do. Fortunately, my sister loves animals more than anyone I know, but the thought of how to get them to Boston stresses me out. I will either hire a van service to take them door to door -- which is extremely expensive, and the thought of them being stuck in a car for a day or two with strangers is not something I wish on them -- or she will come to Nashville and fly back with them; airlines allow you to bring one pet on board, so she will take one, and a friend will take the other. I wish I could magically just get them to Boston, because that is really what is worrying me the most right now. I know that is foolish, but I don't take my responsibilities lightly.

Hi OPB - Pet person here r191. Two cats also (one also rescued when "dumped" at a vet's clinic) so I also take my responsibilities as owner seriously. I was recently considering relocating from one city to another and would have been forced to fly, most likely. This issue had me also stressed, even worrying about one cat in possible cargo which I nixxed owing to risks in cargo hold. So yeah, I get it. I'm chiming in only because I have considered options for cats as well. I agree, ground travel would be difficult for them. If you can afford to pay and get the two people to accompany the cats onboard (in cabin) then you are home free. One or two hours in the air and there are good to go. I have done this before and it is stress-free for the animals and it is over before they know it. Sorry to rag on...just trying to soothe your concerns and help based on my own recent experience.

I've been following this conversation and so much of it upsets me. Obviously you have chosen your path OP, but you seem to be in denial to your fate. You have said you have two cats, yet you have really not thought of their existence after you are gone. You need to get your act together. I know I will be bashed over this comment, but you don't have my sympathy at this point. Everything that has been pointed out to you you just seemed to have not thought it out. Life is not just about you OP, it is about your animals and your family. At this point your just sound selfish.

What, R193? I'm not sure what you mean. OPB here, and I have mentioned several times that I am completely stressed about my cats. My sister is taking them, and, yet, I worry about them all the time and feel like I am letting them down. And I completely understand what my fate is. How can you say that I am in denial about it, and that I am not thinking of my family and pets? Perhaps I misunderstood your post, or you have misunderstood mine.

Your comment at R186 R194

R193 is a troll, already on the list

Like I care R196. This calling people trolls is BS.

I think the problem here is that OP could drop dead any minute and he doesnt have a plan or person in place who will make sure the cats are taken care off. He also doesn't seem to call his friends or family regularly to let them know he is ok. So he could basically just die any minute and the cats would be alone for several days or weeks. What happens if you have an emergency and have to go to the hospital, OP? Do you have friends or neighbors who visit you daily? Some here already suggested a call service, but maybe you could look for an organization/church were volunteers visit you regularly and make sure you're ok. You could also ask at a shelter if someone was willing to foster your cats till your sister can pick them up or help you get them to Boston. Shelters usually have a lot of contacts and resources.

You also still have your sister and mother OP, but don't seem to have that many friends in Nashville. Wouldn't it be nice to spend your last weeks with your family instead of alone at your loft? You probably don't want to be a burden, but maybe it is time to ask your sister for help. If my brother only had a couple of weeks left, I would definitely invite him to spend his last days with me instead of all alone in his apartment.

Let Brian do what he wants to do, Little Miss Scoldy Pants R198. You're way out of line here.

Brian, kudos to you for stressing about your cats. A question, can you accompany your sister to Boston? It would help both you and the cats to be there when they land at their new home. As for flying or driving, there are kitty tranquilizers that work very well for travel. My daughter travels between two locations in her car a few times a year and they work just enough to make them nod out and be wide awake once they get to their destination. Ask your vet about them today. There are also scent diffusers that emit relaxing potions into the air for cats. You will miss your cats and your cats will miss you, but you are doing the right thing by them. Stay strong.

R193, OPB has clearly stated that his sister is going to take the cats soon, and he's currently figuring out how to do it. Taking a few days to organise this is not unreasonable, especially since he's been feeling okay those last weeks, so there's no reason to think he's going to keel over right now.

As for the one saying he should stay with his family, you know what he should do? Exactly what he wants. Some people will want to stay with their family, some won't, and no one should compromise on that. I think if I was in his place I'd rather go alone too.

[quote]there are kitty tranquilizers that work very well for travel

Was just about to post the same thing. I have a couple of friends who moved from L.A. to NYC and had two cats -- they flew with the cats (who'd been given the tranquilizers) in the cabin and all was well. They'd also previously taken the cats (again, medicated) along on LONG road trips without incident.

You can also get FeliWay mist to spray inside their carriers (about 20-30 minutes before you put the cats in) to help relax them, and have your sister get FeliWay plug-in diffusers for her home to help ease the transition and lessen the stress.

Your feline friends are going to a loving home -- there may be an adjustment period, but they'll be just fine. :-)

Brian, I LOVE pop art and yours is so good. This isn't a pity post. I really love your work. The gallery goers looking at tomatoes was just fantastic and my personal favorite. How can I buy a print?

I fucking hate cancer. It's so cruel and unfair. Thanks for being a good human. Enjoy your last days. London, watching bad TV, whatever you need. Your DL family won't forget you. Thanks for being so candid.

OP rims.

[quote] I know I will be bashed over this comment, but you don't have my sympathy at this point.

Did anyone ask for or care about your sympathy?

[quote] Wouldn't it be nice to spend your last weeks with your family instead of alone at your loft?

I can't even imagine having the brass balls and total cluelessness to offer a stranger an unsolicited lecture on how YOU think he should spend the final days of his life. What the almighty fuck?

Brian, ignore the bad posts here. Have a great time in London. I hope you get to see and do everything you have planned.

It's the same guy who started the "I blocked that person" thread, R205. They're either a troll or have an untreated personality disorder.

R193/R198 is a massive cunt who probably has to guilt her family members into spending time with her. I hope her cats eat her in her sleep.

OPB here. R198 , thanks for your concern, but what is best for you might not be what is right for someone else. I get the most enjoyment from spending time alone, reading or painting. I don't have much time left, and I prefer to not uproot my life to suit someone else's idea of what one should do when the time is running out. And don't think for an instant that I'm not stressing out about the cats and doing what I can to ensure a good future for them. If they could, I'm sure they, too, would thank you for your concern.

R203 -- OPB here. I'm afraid I don't sell prints. I have a licensing agent who sells prints of older paintings, but I haven't given them new art to print in years. That tomato painting, by the way, was painted for a local exhibit. There is a big festival in Nashville every year, "TomatoFest," and an art gallery in the area has a huge exhibit of artwork featuring tomatoes. That one sold, but, if you send me an email, I would be happy to forward a high-res file and you can print it if you want. You can find my email in the "contact" section of my website.

Brian, what is the link for your site?

My site is...

Thanks, Brian! Loved the Snoopy one!

Brian, love your art work.

Hi Brian, just checking in with a weekly hug.

I have been following these threads since the beginning and wanted to share my admiration for Brian. I work at a veterinary clinic, and we have made arrangements with clients to take their pets and care for them until arrangements can be made. Pets need health certificates to travel on plane. I hope your cats veterinarian can offer assistance whenever you may need it.

Hello Brian, sending good wishes from England. I was the dolt who didn’t know the Russell Hotel had changed name.. I used to live literally round the corner, decades ago. Your posts have touched me and I wish you well.

OPB here, R217. Did you see the movie of Cats? I hope not, for your sake! The facade of the Russell Hotel features prominently in the very beginning of the movie, so, apparently, the set designer also did not know it has changed names! I'm still hoping I can get back in March. I will find out of the immunotherapy is working in about another month. And R216 -- it would not have occurred to me that the cats need health certificates to travel on a plane. Thank you for that information.

Hey Brian! Hope you've been feeling good. Love you!

Hi Brian! I’ve been enjoying looking at your art which is all so cheerful. After days and days of Trump all day and all night every time I look on the TV, it’s nice to look at something so colorful and vibrant. It reminds me there are still beautiful, happy things in the world, it’s not all doom and gloom.

R216 is correct. Your kitties should be given a health check up, ensure vaccinations are up to date, etc. I would check with both the Vet and airlines to ensure you have all information (latest information, as policies change from time to time). Should also enquire about size of pet carriers they allow. It's a pain but getting all your data ahead of time is critical for smooth trip.

[bold]Note: Also make sure vaccinations are done ahead of time (can't remember how many days/weeks they require in advance of flying) to ensure kitties meet airline travel regs,

About Plane Travel with Cats:

You need a complete check up for the Cats with a vet and all vaccinations, to travel on a plane. Get a good vet now, Brian. Also, only a few airlines let you buy a pet ticket to bring on the plane with you. Also, these regulations can change, so fall back is driving them. It is just another headache for you, so sorry. Sister and friends may have to drive them.

I hope you are having some fun planning your trip to London.

Bless you Brian.

Just a weekly check in, hoping everything is okay, as well as sending positive vibes on this supremely windy day in L.A.

Sending good wishes Brian. No, I didn’t see Cats :) Hoping all is well.

I was thinking about your today, Brian. I just wanted to tell you this and check in with you.

Hey OPB....are you doing okay? We're here for you in spirit.

OPB here. Thank you for asking, those of you who asked. I am feeling good. I have a scan next week to find out if the immunotherapy is working. I should know on Thursday or Friday. And today's my birthday. I always thought I would die on my birthday, but, I guess not!

Happy birthday. Brian! Glad to hear you are doing well!

A Very Happy Birthday OP Brian! How are travel plans going for London?

Happy Birthday, Brian! 🎂 I would also like to hear about your travel plans for London.

Happy Birthday Brian! So glad you're feeling good!

Happy birthday 🎉🎁🎂

Happy Birthday! Hope you get a fantastic gift next Thursday/Friday.

Happy birthday Brian! Hope you had a wonderful day and wishing you good news next week!

Happy Birthday, OPB, and I join the others in wishing you the gift of wonderful news next week!

Happy birthday fellow Aquarian! So glad that you're here with us.

Happy birthday, OPB! Glad you are feeling well and hope you get good news next week.

OPB here. Thank you all for the birthday wishes. I sold a big painting today -- 5 x 6 feet; larger than I usually paint -- so it was a pretty good day! :)

Oooh funds for the London trip! Congrats OPB!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OPB!

Wishing you more happy days to come, including your exciting trip to London!

Happy Belated Birthday Brian, congrats on selling your painting!

OPB here. I thought I would let you know...I had the scan yesterday, and was supposed to find out the results on Thursday, when I went in for my scheduled immunotherapy. The hospital called me this morning, though, and told me that there is no need to come in, because the immunotherapy is not working, and the tumors continue to grow. They said there is another trial they will see if I am a candidate for, and there is also a possibility that radiation will help stop the growth. If either of those do not work -- and, at this point, I'm not sure they will -- they believe I will have 2 - 10 months left. I will continue to be asymptomatic, until the tumor shifts, and cuts off one of my artery, at which point, I will be dead in seconds. That sounds like a good way to go! I will, likely, have more frequent scans so they can monitor how quickly the tumor is growing. I am thankful that the tumor is a non depilating kind, and it will stay out of my way until it does what it wants to do.

I am so sorry to hear of this latest setback. Sending good thoughts and prayers your way, OPB

I'm speechless, OP. Sad but keep on, you've fought and continue to fight the good fight. You have incredible specialists around you and I'm certain they are exploring everything now. Stupid question: Is London trip off?

Everyone: If this thread goes by a day without anyone posting, please BUMP if you pop by. The "Watched" feature on DL not working.

Stay strong, Brian, we are here for you.

OPB never give up, fight it all the way the next treatment might be the right cure.

R245 Now it’s working again..

Thanks, r248. There's now a nasty list of DL "watched" threads appearing on the left hand side of the screen which I cannot get rid of. Blocks half the screen.

r245

Oh OPB, that sucks. I know it's a lot, but can you pop in and say hi to us every day, even if it is just "Hi"? Sometimes I wonder if you're okay if we don't hear from you in a week.

I'm sorry, Brian.

Yes, r250. Just a wave back to us OP Brian every day and we are good.

Thanks for the kind words. I am not sure how much I am going to fight it. If I don't, I will remain mostly asymptomatic until the end. I don't know what kind of side effects the trial will have, if I get into it. The side-effects of the last trial were unpleasant, and I think I would rather have a few months of feeling great, than a few more of feeling bad. I will wait to find out more about the trial and possible radiation -- which I'm told will have no side-effects -- before I know what I will do. In the meantime, I still am planning on going to London, if I am still able to. Thank you all again. It is great to have this board and all of you to touch base with.

That sounds a very sensible plan, Brian. Much love.

We're honored OP Brian, r253 you chose us to open up to. We're grateful to you and I know I've learned a few hard lessons here reading your posts and the many responses and outpourings of concern, sympathy, empathy, and dare I say, Love.

Bitch , you are NOT DEAD YET .

[quote] OPB never give up, fight it all the way the next treatment might be the right cure.

I'm guessing this is well-meaning, but not everyone wants to take this route. IMO, that's not OP's goal. Treatments can be very debilitating, messy, painful, etc. It's his choice what he wants to do.

Not starting a fight here, but I have been following these threads.

I vote that we enshrine OPB as a DL patron saint, right here and now while he has the time to know it.

Thinking of you Brian😘

Really, it's all for the best isn't it? You've fought long and hard enough. There's some mercy in the painless end you describe. Not many get even that. Enjoy your final months. We all have to die. Peace.

I cried a little in the office when I read this today. I wish you continued peace, OPB.

I'm sorry to hear that Brian, but I say get yourself to London anyway. The worst that can happen is you get sick over there and they have the NHS to take care of you. Enjoy the fuck out of your time here, which may well be years. Doctors really often wrong about these things.

It has been such an honor that you are sharing your life with us. You are our blessing. We (really I) are so blessed to have you in our lives. We support you and your decisions.

With so much LOVE,

We support you Brian!

Thank you for doing the trial therapy Brian. It can't be easy for you, and I admire your calmness. Would you give me your website or FB? I'd like to keep up with your artwork. x

Brian, just wanted to tell you how much I love your new painting, "Snowy." I hope your London trip is fabulous!

R264 He's already given his website at R212.

here it is...

I second the vote to make OPB an official DL Patron Saint.

He performed the miracle of transubstantiating datalounge into a supportive, positive collective.

All in favor?

OPB here. I have been dealing with all of the difficulties I've been facing with a good degree of stoicism, I think, and one of the very few times I've cried is when I've read the some of the comments on here. Thank you. Your support and kindness is invaluable.

Aww, OPB, you're a sweetheart.

Hi from London, OPB. I’m really glad you booked a return for the Warhol. I think of you often. I think your approach and reasoning make sense about your remaining time; I’d feel the same if it were me. I have your back, for what it’s worth.

I’ll keep checking in, especially in March. If you need anything at all, I’d be happy to assist in any way I can. xx

Happy Valentine's Day, OP Brian.

Happy Valentine's Day, OP Brian.

OPB, I think of you often and have so much admiration for you. So glad you will see London and the Warhol. Please continue to check in with us. Much love.

Brian, please check in. We miss you!

Thank you, R275. I continue to feel well, although a scan shows that the tumors in my lungs are inflamed, so I am on prednisone to help them shrink. I saw the radiologist this week, and he recommends that, because I don't respond to treatment, I blast the tumors to keep them from growing too fast. He insists that the radiation will be free of side-effects, and I will trust him. He also said that the tumors should shrink enough that I will most likely not die in as soon as two months, as my oncologist suggested. I know that cancer is unpredictable, and I don't expect any doctor to know exactly what I can expect or when. I will continue to operate under the assumption that I can go any time, but that is really true for all of us.

I'm meeting the oncologist again on Tuesday because he thinks he can get me in a different trial. I will listen to him, but I am not inclined to try another treatment. I have not responded to any of the many treatments I have had, and I don't have any interest in chasing after any possible cure when I know none truly exists. I would rather have a few months of feeling great, than a few more of feeling side effects of a treatment.

Thank you for checking in on me, and all the kind words and thoughts. I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend!

Hi Brian, a close friend of mine had radiation on brain tumors (metastasized from another kind of cancer). IIRC, no side effects from the radiation. So, I'm hoping the same for you.

Hi Brian, thanks for the check in. Let's hope that the radiation does shrink the tumors to the extent that you can enjoy your London trip.

OPB, you will know when enough is enough. Meanwhile, please keep us posted on your London trip! London/England/Scotland were my favorite vacation ever.

Nice to hear from you Brian. My MIL has had good results with Avastin for her inoperable lung cancer with few side effects.

I hope yiu have a nice trip to London.

Brian, your oncologist sounds like a REAL FUN GUY (in my best Rosanne Rosannadanna voice.) Seriously, he seems like a huge pessimist and doomsayer.What’s up with that?

OPB here again. I just want to say: Life is difficult, and I know that every one of us has problems. It is remarkable that so many of you have taken the time to show support, and to make my burden a little lighter. Thank you for having such amazing empathy and kindness.

OP Brian, we support you. we love you. You make the choices and medical decisions that work for you. I wish you a great week-end and a fun trip to London. Or whatever you are planning to do. It is up to up!

Love and Power, from me, always!

I think about you often, and always wish you the best, my sweetie!

Wishing you also a great weekend, OP Brian. Think of you often also on and off DL and marvel that your incredible strength and spirit are not diminished since your very first post in this series. Look forward to the London trip 'updates' like last time. Did you get the hotel resolved? Can't remember.

Thank you for being here with us Brian, for some reason, I really look forward to hearing from you. You've always been gracious and encouraging, even when your life isn't. A real class act and a rare bird.

You sound strong Brian. Keep at your art. I continue to marvel at my friend who is fighting c too; It has not dimmed her light either. Love you.

Hello Brian , so good to hear from you. I thought of you today as am in London on business, staying in the CoventGarden Travel Lodge just down Holborn. ( thé glamour, darling! ) My cab drove past the erstwhile Russell Hotel where you stayed last time and I silently wished you well, wherever you are, so was very pleased to see this update today. I do hope you remain well enough to visit London again. X

Hey Brian, how are you doing? Still planning for London or are you avoiding the airports (due to Corona virus)? Anyway, hope you're OK. Check in if you're up to it.

OPB here, Thank you all for the kinds words, and for checking in! I am feeling great. I do have a tumor that is pressing against my spine, however, which feels almost like a broken rib when I breath heavily, laugh, or cough. I have been able to shrink it in the past with prednisone, but the last round of meds did not work, so I start radiation on Thursday to shrink that tumor, and the more urgent one that is pressing against my artery. I am willing to believe that the radiation will be free of side effects. It would appear, though, that the next few months will be like whack a mole; zapping the tumors until they just become resistant to radiation. It does appear to be painless, thankfully.

I’m not worried about the virus as of yet. I’ve always been very careful about germs, and carry a hand sanitizer with me. I will just have to be extra careful, but, really, there are virus all around us when we go outside, and this is just one more, although one we still know little about. I am as likely to die in a pane crash as from the virus, and I am not one to live in a bubble.

The only reason I would cancel the trip is if London shuts down its theaters and museums, because, then, I would not be able to do what I am going there to do. Given the level of panic, it is not impossible that they will do just that, though; Northern Italy did, after all, although it would be more difficult to do in a large city. I will also cancel if there are complications from the radiation, but I don’t foresee that happening.

In the meantime, I am truly grateful for feeling as well as I do, and for all of you caring and offering such care and kindness and encouragement. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!

OPB, glad you are feeling great and hope the radiation works wonderfully well to keep you feeling great. Also hope the stupid coronavirus does not fuck with your London trip!

Glad to hear London is still on, OP B. We are living in strange times with these nutty viruses around us. And you are right, we are constantly bombarded by germs, viruses so one has to be philosophical about these things. I wonder if you could get some deals on theatres, hotels. I was reading yesterday that 90% of hotel rooms (think they were referring to Rome) are being cancelled. Suspect London may not be too far off in that regard. Take care, stay safe, and please do keep us posted!

Thanks so much for the thread/updates OPB. I have a brother going through pancreatic cancer for past year and it has been so helpful to me to understand through the eyes of someone going through it. I can only theorize how he feels - and struggle to be supportive and provide him with what he needs. You seem very strong - and accepting. I’m hoping my brother gets there - lots of anger for past year. Curious if that Is who you have always been - or if the cancer process changed you.

R292. I think I have always pretty much been like that. I never went through the anger stage of having cancer. I am an atheist, so, perhaps because of that, I have always believed that there is no reason why anything happens; it just does. I don't think I'm any more special than anyone else, and, thus, I am more deserving of good health and other things. I don't have any sense of entitlement. It has come in handy.

I meant to type NO MORE deserving of good health... My kingdom for an edit function!

I can't remember - Are you going for 1 week OP B? More ? Less? Was just reading on ConornaVirus thread, that the Louvre has shut down today, first Sunday of every month they open the museum free of charge. Wonder what the situation is with museums and other venues in London. I don't think the U.K. is perhaps as affected as the mainland. Is there any way to find out?

They have universal health care there, unlike the US. So does France, if you want to do an excursion trip. When are you leave for your trip?

Bon Voyage!

Have fun planning, and of course, while on your trip!

Been thinking of you, OPB

Thanks OPB. You make me proud of the pragmatism and atheistic acceptance of many gay men. Your point on entitlement really hits home - I think many rural, religious white folks like my brother feel they are entitled and that God should cure them because they have been devotedly religious. His anger may stem from feeling that the belief system he adhered to his whole life is a fraud. But also think you are uniquely strong and accepting. Thank you for showing a great way to approach our mortality.

Hi OP Brian - Hope you are okay and survived the tornado. Do you have power?

Brian— are you OK?

OPB here. The tornado hit my neighborhood, but my block did not get any damage, fortunately. I live in an old car factory that has been converted to lofts, and my sleeping berth is just feet from the roof. I could hear the wind howling above me -- it sounded like a jet plane engine or a very loud fan -- and then, BOOM, rain like you wouldn't believe. I love the sound of a storm, though, so I quite enjoyed it.

I have seen photos of damage, but I did not see any in person. Voting this morning, however, was a nightmare. My local voting place was closed, as, I am told, three other places in the area. The entire neighborhood had to go to a makeshift voting location, where they had lines snaked around the building, and ONE voting booth. It was madness! I was glad to see so many people turn out for the primary.

Glad to hear from you Brian. You didn't move to a safer part of the building? You were just chilling near the roof? Eek!

Good to hear you're safe and sound, OPB. Let's hope the Covid madness dies down, so you can go to London.

Holy shit Brian, I'm so glad you're ok. I'm glad you got to vote too. Take care of yourself.

OPB, I commend you for voting despite the obstacles!

Wow, what a mess. Glad you are okay, Brian. VOTE, power to the people!

Hi from London again, Brian! I’m glad to read your updates here. Just wanted to send support and hugs, lovely man!

Hi OPB - Wondering if you have already left for London. Or if you decided against it?

OPB here. I leave on the 19th. I'm still going. I'm not worried about the virus, although I probably should be. If I were to catch it, I will most likely die, because my lungs are already compromised because of the tumors. I think , though, we run the risk of catching something every time we leave the house, so I am not too worried about the addition of a new virus to the mix. I will cancel, though, if the museums shut down (like the Louvre last week, ugh!) or if they start cancelling theater. Or...if I end up having side effects from the radiation I am currently going through. My radiologist swears that I will not have any side effects, but, if I were to, they would manifest themselves a few weeks after treatment ends, so, for the time being, all systems are go!

Thank you all for checking in on me. I appreciate it, and hope everyone has a fantastic day.

Hey OP, I had metastatic melanoma ( lungs, vertebra , knee and a couple lumps on my back) I did radiation for the vertebra , NO PROBLEM! My back nodules were removed surgically and Immune Therapy ( Opdivo and Yervoy) took care of everything else. Wiped it out! I too should have been a goner, but I happened on an immune therapy that worked. YOU TOO can happen on something that will work. I know your mind is set on your situation, I get it ! But please don't turn down any offer of a possible path to remission. It's not fun, I know that, it's fucking exhausting! I've been there. I'm not on DL a lot but I have followed your thread as your situation was timely with mine. Enjoy London ! Have a fuckin blast and please have a little bit of hope. Your breaking my heart!

R309. Thanks for your info, and I'm glad that treatment worked for you. That is fantastic! I am not on any treatment, other than the radiation. I tried immunotherapy and chemo twice each, and none of it worked. The doctor wanted me to try a different kind of chemo, but I declined. Although I plowed through and tried to make light of them, the side effects from treatment were more than I would like to face again, so...no more treatment, other than occasional radiation to shrink problematic tumors. I'm glad they worked for you!

Hey OPB, its [R309] I'm certainly not going to preach, I got you, I understand. I was not a person of great Faith when I was diagnosed. But I learned to pray. Not for me, but for the people around me. That they be given the strength to deal it and for dealing with me. I send prayers up for your strength now.

I actually admire OPBs atheism. It seems to be a core part of his strength. His cold eyed pragmatism seems to have served him well. I say keep up the strong clear grounded view of life and death.

R309- ROCK ON!!!!!!!

Melanoma is a CUNT of the highest order-

You are a miracle.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Many more years of health and joy.

XOXOXOXOXOOOXOXOXOXOXOOX

Thank You !!

OPB: Please don’t let these people make you second guess your religious views, your treatment plans or anything else. I think you have a great handle on who you are and the decisions you make. Enjoy your time and embrace who you are. You are very inspiring to many on here.

Have Fun Brian! Keep us posted. We support you and your decisions.

OPB here. A number of friends are surprised that I have not found any type of faith given what I am going through, and insist that everyone is eventually a Foxhole Christian. I promise them that I am not. My atheism is very deep-seated, and I can't imagine anything will change that. Since I live in very Christian Nashville, a number of people I run into ask to pray over me. Under normal circumstances I would not let them, but, now, I do. I realize they are not praying for me; they are praying for themselves. If it makes them feel better to pray for my health or afterlife, I bite my tongue and let them. I know that a lot of people love me and will miss me, and, if that gives them a deeper connection to me or gives them hope that I will get better, who am I to not let them pray? I, however, do not join in their prayers, but I don't dismiss those who do. Also: One of my best friends whom I love like a brother wrote me the sweetest hand-written note (and who does that these days?) saying that he hopes I am wrong and that there IS an afterlife, because he wants to see me again. That is one of the most touching things anyone has said to me. And it is especially touching because he was my best friend for about 15 years, but we become estranged shortly after he got married and his wife had a baby. We hadn't talked for a few years, but it is all water under the bridge and we are as close as we were before we became estranged, although we don't see each other often because he has a few kids now. I am very thankful that we were able to reconcile while we had a chance.

And again OPB, you have shown what a uniquely strong and aware person you are. You really have a lot to teach us - which is why this thread has such loyal adherents I think. That take on prayer is wonderfully reconciling - for atheists but also for the militantly anti-religious. Accept it as well intentioned - even if religion isn’t something you (or I) believe in.

Hey, OPB! Glad to hear you're doing well and still planning on heading to London. Hope you have a fabulous time!

To add to R318's thoughts: what I love about these threads is how level-headed everyone is, especially OPB.

These days, people all over the place are losing their minds and freaking out over POSSIBLY contracting a virus – which MIGHT give them flu-like symptoms and from which they would most likely recover – and yet OPB is staring cancer in the face and going, "Yup. It's *definitely* going to kill me. Not sure when my number will be called, but I'm okay with everything and I'm gonna make the most of life until it is."

Hope everyone has a wonderful Sunday!

Love your optimism OPB, but my only concern is that should you contract Covid-19, it would be a very miserable way to die (not that dying of cancer is any better). With Covid-19, you will actually feel horrible/sick and then die. Sorry to be so morbid, just don't want you suffering any more than you should be.

Brian, How are you, today? Just wanted to check in with you.

I was thinking about OP Brian yesterday as well. I am guessing London trip is off? Or Not?

OPB here. I had a pretty rough week. A tumor in my back inflamed, which caused incredible pain. I could barely walk, sit, breath, or move without agony. Fortunately, the doctor prescribed a heavy-duty steroid which shrunk the swelling, and, although it is still uncomfortable, it is manageable, and I feel a lot better, thank you. But, alas, I believe I will have to cancel the trip. Although flights from the UK have not ben banned yet, I suspect they will be presently. Since the UK is still part of the EU, I imagine it will be easy-enough for Europeans to travel to London to board flights, so they will become more restricted. I can't risk being stuck in London for a month, as lovely as that would be. Also: since they have shut museums and theater and public gatherings in NYC, it is only a matter of time before London does the same. I hope I live long enough or am well-enough to travel once the dust has all settled. I am hopeful that the airline will refund or give me credit for the ticket, but I am not counting on it. I am thankful that I was in London in November, and that I have my paints and cats to keep me company until then. Thank you for checking in, and may we all be healthy and protected from the virus and the madness.

Sending love and hugs to you and your cats from me and my cats in London, Brian. I’m glad your doctor could bring some relief. I’m thinking of you. x

I’ve been thinking of Brian the last couple of days too.

Thank you for your update, OPB. Sorry to hear about your back. The airline should refund you, given what's going on. If not, I'll call them for you and be a Mega Bitch on Wheels. Sending love and furry purrs from Theo, Mahler, and Bosch (the air balloon boys) on this rainy day in Los Angeles:

I'm sorry to hear about the pain, OP Brian. But you are getting some relief, however minor so that is good. This whole virus is indeed "turning the world upside down" as the Mayor of New York said today. I am kind of glad in a way that you are not going to London; at least not right now, or for the foreseeable future. It's good you went in November - perfect timing that trip was. I am guessing you are somewhat quarantined these days but so happy you have your paints and kitties to bring a smile to your face. That's important. :)

OPBrian,

oh no, I am so sorry that you had this intense pain, and this rough week because of this and everything. Yeah, you will get that amazing London trip. Most Importantly, is YOU. How can we keep you UP, with us and feeling supported?

Painting and Cats, sounds fabulous actually.

Hey Brian, How's it going? How was your weekend? Did you get any painting done? I've been lazy to do projects. Check in, if possible!

I've been thinking about you a lot lately Brian, hope all is well. Such bad timing with the trip, but as usual you're handling it with intelligence and grace. Take care OPB

OPB here. I am just absolutely stunned by what is going on. I tend to not panic, and really thought we could glide through this with minimal disruption to our lives, but I think I was wrong.

The least of my concerns is having to cancel the trip. I hope I’m alive, or at least able to travel, when the dust settles. In the meantime, I am absolutely astonished that British Airways will not refund my ticket, since it was a non-refundable ticket. That seems incredibly selfish and greedy and tone-deaf, but, then again, I have seen so much greed in the last week, that I am not surprised by anything.

I know a few people who have gone out and bought big extra freezers, then loaded them with food, and then complained and panicked that supermarket shelves were empty. Well, of course they are empty. You and everyone else just bought more food in a day than you usually buy in a month, and you expect the shelves to magically restock themselves? I am really saddened at how selfish and ignorant people are being. It makes me sad.

Despite calls for maintaining social distance, someone posted a video of a crowded downtown Nashville bar that is, actually, just a few blocks from where I live, under the headline “Nashville will not be defeated.” I can not even begin to understand how someone can think going to a crowded bar against all health warnings can be considered a sign of being “undefeated.”

Who would have thought that any of this would be happening just 2 weeks ago? Most of us knew that things would change, but I never expected them to change quite this much in so little time. It is unimaginable. Who knows what lies ahead? It is frightening to even think about.

Yes, unbelievable. Where I am we've had drought, raging fires, devastation of our wildlife, floods, and now this plague. Consequently our markets have plummeted taking our pensions.. This week marks the day last year my guy suddenly lost his 30 year job which he'd dedicated himself to, shortly thereafter our dog died.

When this plague eases we will probably start all over, maybe even in another country. I have a feeling we are changing as people to those who are a lot more eager to act on our wishes to make our life decisions without family or employer obligation. It's about time...cause maybe there isn't as much left as we might hope...

Yes I think it’s forced everyone to consider our mortality and the irrelevance of the getting and spending. Something OPB has done for us these last few months. Sorry your trip was cancelled. Hoping the trip can happen yet.

Although the trip was cancelled - it’s always good to hear from you OPB. Wishing you well.

Brian, I would check with your credit card company about a refund. They will have more leverage with British Airways... worth a try. So sorry about all the agita you're going through. Thanks for checking in.

Brian, Sorry you had to cancel your trip.

If you really wanted your money back, get your doctor to sign a note and go through you credit card company. For you medical safety, you had to cancel. MD orders. It up to you if you want them to know your business. Yes, they are greedy. bastards. Just a thought that might work.

Take Care and much love!

[quote]Despite calls for maintaining social distance, someone posted a video of a crowded downtown Nashville bar that is, actually, just a few blocks from where I live, under the headline “Nashville will not be defeated.” I can not even begin to understand how someone can think going to a crowded bar against all health warnings can be considered a sign of being “undefeated.”

I absolutely agree, and it's crazy to see both the UK and the US act like this is a terrorist attack, not a pandemic. It's all "Blitz Spirit" this and "we'll beat it by going on as usual" that, and I'm gobsmacked.

Take care, and check with your credit card company about a refund, seriously.

I agree with advice on credit card refund. I'd call tlhem and explain exactly the situation (broader issues beyond your control i.e, pandemic, etc) and appeal to common sense and/or morality. I am also shocked at this outcome but as someone just said on NBC, "these are not normal times."

Would they consider a pandemic a force majeure type situation? Some companies can weasel out of things citing that.

Brian, have you been on ba.com? British Airways changed the requirements for refund in some cases. Check their new policies, and attempt to pursue it with them if you can.

Hi Brian - Hope you are feeling ok today, and not too much pain. Also hope you are able to sleep. Are you enjoying your paints? Everyone feeling "anxious" about the outbreak. Such a shame London fell off the radar but with the ever evolving situation overseas, it was probably for the best. Maybe things will settle down in a few weeks and you can reschedule. On a much more serious note, were you able to partake in celebratory green drinks yesterday? I went onto the Dublin Earth Cam yesterday and poor Template Bar was largely desolate, empty, vacant, except for the odd passers-by. Crazy times indeed.

Temple Bar ^^^^

Hi Brian, I've been following your threads and am very impressed with how you are handling a very difficult situation. It's good the radiation treatments aren't causing any trouble. The London trip would have been great but now with virus wreaking havoc, except for the monetary loss, I agree, it's a good thing you're safe at home.

Your artwork is wonderful, so colorful and whimsical. I especially like the Green Stamps painting having had a funny experience with Green Stamps many years ago. My father had collected quite a stack and after wetting them all and putting them in the little books, he placed them in the oven on warm to dry. Then he forgot about them. I came along and turned on the oven to preheat for some reason, came back a while later, and the books were on fire. I was able to quickly put out the fire, pulled out the books, they were blackened and singed at the edges. But, enough remained intact that he was able to redeem at a place that pretty much looked like your painting.

What a great story, R343! My last radiation treatment was today. Ive been having crippling headaches, and, when I lay down on my back, it feels as though my left eyes is being squeezed in a vice. It goes away as soon as I sit up, so the doctors don't know what it is, so I have to have a brain MRI. I am not looking forward to it! I've been through worse, so I will just grin and bear it.

Hi Brian, Thank you for checking in. Congratulations on your last radiation treatment. Sorry to hear about your headaches. Do you have a recliner chair that you can sleep in? Maybe this recent DL thread about adjustable beds / recliners might help. Who knew Data Lounge could be so helpful.

Brian, how are you doing these days? Please let us know.

OPB here. The last few days have been rather trying. Nashville is on lockdown as of midnight tonight. Only essential businesses will be open. Not to paint a dire picture, but I know I will not outlive the quarantines and the effects of the virus. I have to wonder at which point I should use the meds I have and simply exit. Is this really the world I want to continue to live in, knowing that I won’t live long enough to see the fog lift?

My main concern right now is getting my cats to my sister in Boston. She had planned to visit and then bring them back on the cabin, but she can’t now because my mom recently had her hip replaced, and her PT was halted because of the quarantines, so my sister needs to take care of her longer than she thought she thought she would have to. (The virus has long, unexpected fingers.) The longer we wait, though, the more difficult it will become. Will all flights be halted soon?

I am not too concerned about what happens to me. I know my time is over soon. It is simply incomprehensible, though, that this is what the world is now. It will take years and years for things to get back to normal, if they ever do. I don't get stressed about much, but it is difficult to not be affected by what is happening now. I hope all of you are sheltered and well.

Brian, can you find someone else, as an emergency backup, to take care of your cats? (Before your sister can "take custody"?) That will probably ease your mind quite a bit.

OPB I am a loss for words... can someone transport your cats to your sister and mom? I'm sure they would bring a little light to their quarantine. And it would give someone a job in these times.

As far as your survival, how long do you think you can last? And is it lack of medical attention and pain that is the most dire? The tumor on your spine? What are your doctors advising?

Brian, so sorry. I think it is a good idea to find a back up plan for your cats, until your sister can get them. Do you think you can do this? Do you have local support?

I don't want you to be in unnecessary pain, but I don't want to see your light extinguished so soon.

Whatever you decide is the right course. There will always be a permanent tear in my heart for all you are going through and will have gone through.

I love you, Brian.

I love you too Brian, thank you for everything and I support whatever you decide.

I'm going to go against the grain here and ask that unless you are in pain, to not end it now. Your mom, sister, and cat all love you and want to keep you around as long as you are not suffering. I know it's crazy out in the world now, and in some respects we all want to withdraw totally, but we will miss you here on DL, and we hardly got to know you. Don't hate me. I just am hoping for a miracle until the last possible second. I wish I lived nearby, I'd break isolation rules to come and meet you & kitty. Love you.

I'm R311 and R309. Hell, Id take your cats to Boston on a flight with me. I flew with mine( fat Burmese with an attitude that lived 21 yrs) on several occasions. One from Georgia to California when I was transferred and ATL to Miami. If you cant find anybody, you let me know when you need this! I'll escort and deliver the cats. Geez ! I cant stand your worrying about this. I'm in San Antonio and have relatives in Nashville. We can meet up. I'm a military officer and I can give you all the references you need. I understand you have a website? I can go there and leave my email. For what it's worth, I'm standing with R55...…. Stay in peace and try to be comfortable.

meant R355....I'm flustered !

[quote]fat Burmese with an attitude that lived 21 yrs

Lol ❤️

r356, here is OPB's website. You can contact him through it I believe.

Thanks !!!

Ok Brian, you have my info and contact source. Let me hear from you, if/when you need me. My treat .

You are all too kind. My mom is panicked about my sister traveling, so I do need to find another way to transport my cats to Boston. I just contacted a van transport service a friend of a friend used, and am waiting to hear back from them. You are all too kind to offer help and suggestions. I'm deeply touched. And, alas, I do not have anyone to take them in, which is why I'm eager to take care of it now. Most of my friends are dog people, allergic to cats, or don't like them. (How is such a thing possible?!?)

Brian, I love you. I have been reading this thread since the first post and not a day has gone by that I haven’t checked in here to see how you’re doing. I even thought of visiting you when I was in Nashville, but I didn’t want to be weird. Now I wish I had, because you’ve truly changed me, and I thought I was too old to change. Please know that you are so loved, and that whatever happens you have made such a difference to so many people. And if you are still with us and comfortable next time I’m in Nashville, and I hope you are, I will visit.

R356, I love you too.

Brian, this van service - do you know someone who has used them with a pet? There may be local rescue groups that do caravaning with animals on their way to different parts of the US who would probably help out for a donation.

Brian, I'm glad you are being resourceful about getting your cats to you sister. I googled animal transportation services and found this. Maybe they can help.

These are hard times Brian especially for you. But you are also echoing most of our own feelings with this pandemic. It is horrid and we're all kind of left wondering about life, the future, and even our sanity. But your life is your life. I cannot ever possibly comprehend what you are going through and your state of mind in these trying times. You must do what you must do but .....try to hang in a little longer. I would gladly take your kitties from you as I have two of my own. Big cat person. And unapologetic! If I were in Nashville, they would be with me tonight. I hope the person who offered - that you will take this person up on your offer. Knowing your kitties are safe, and looked after will take so much load off your mind. We are all rooting for you but you know that already.

We have followed you, been fascinated by your incredible imagination, insightful commentary, and endlessly entertained by your detailed travel stories whilst in London. We slowly but surely fell in love each in our own weird, and wonderful ways with you, your artistry and we've come to respect for the decent, kind and loving person you are. I think you can see that and I think you are breaking a few hearts here today. But as I say, you must do what you must do. If only it weren't so.

Have you spoken with your primary physician lately? A few people have asked that question. I'm sure you've considered this and have done this already. Please do not leave without a fond farewell, that is all I ask. You have many, many friends here and we do love you, we do care and we worry more than we like to admit to you. Let us know how the kitty adoption goes. I think you will feel much better once this is sorted. A burden lifted and who knows....you may have a change of heart when all is said and done.

Much love.

Liz in Canada

Mr. Military (r356), would there be a chance you could temporarily foster Brian's cats until his sister is back in Boston?

You are all too kind. Sending the cats north is probably going to be the hardest thing I will have to do. I will miss their company, but I also know that it will become increasingly difficult to ship them. I've already contacted a company that will transport them by van. A friend used them and was happy with them. I will pull the trigger in the next week or two, and hope they are still able to do it. Thank you all for the thoughts, suggestions, and kindness.

I understand you love for them OPB, but putting it off is not advisable. We don't know what our country is going to be link in a week or two. This is tough love, you got to do it now, for the sake of your cats.

Brian, it is funny how people will not help you when you are in need? You obviously are in serious need and support right now. You can be the one always that help people, but when you need serious help and support they are no where to be found. This is my lot in life to.

Focus on your cats. Something tangible to focus on. I am stressing out about this too. Hope this person is the real deal or these cat transport companies. It just another nightmare for you. You do not need this.

Are you doing anything to help you deal and cope better through this mess and nightmare? This is so stressful, you need to take time for you too.

LOVE YOU BRAIN FOREVER!

Wut? Mr. Military offered to help.

Also, "Brain". :p

Brian, I know someone who was until very recently in the Chicago area who fostered lots of cats and had them adopted out to people all over the U.S. He would know someone who could help transport your cats. Do you want me to contact him or is it all sorted already? Please let me know, I'll keep checking the thread.

R372 --I would love any information he might have, thank you. I have contacted the van service that my friend used to schedule a date, but have not heard back from them. More information and another option would be perfect. Thank you!

Brian, check out the link at R365 if your friend's referral doesn't work out.

Citizenshipper.com. They have a good review system for pet shipping.

Brian, have you figured out th he kitty transport yet?

It is hell out there. I am so sorry and worried for Brain and his Cats.

I've contacted a company that a friend of a friend used, and I filled out forms and gave them credit card info. I suppose they are looking for someone in the Nashville area who is able to do it before giving me exact dates. They say they will drive straight through to Boston, and the van is protected from them trying to escape. I am nervous as hell trusting my cats to someone I don't know, but they do come recommended. Im waiting to hear the exact dates from them.. I will feel better once they are on their way, but I won't be completely relaxed until they are in Boston with my sister. Oh , the things we do for those we love. If I end up having to wait too long fo them to firm up details, I might just start a thread on soliciting cat transport.

Can a friend just drive them? I think it's good to look at all the opinions, as you are doing. Call your vet and find out what he would do if he was in your shoes.

Brain, you might need to start a go fund me page. Better yet call your local news for a positive story.

Anybody a journalist on here, we need a story on Brian and his Cats?

Might also be worth checking with the folks at the Nashville Cat Rescue to see if they have any ideas. They likely have a long list of cat-loving, cat-savvy volunteers and resources who could steer you in the right direction.

Sending hugs and support to you and your small furry friends, OPB.

You are running out of time. Transporting your cats is a non essential service. I told you a few days ago you don't have a week or two to think about it. Someone offered to transport them for you. Just fucking take them up on the offer. Now you have made this melodramatic.

Please stop calling him, "Brain".

OPB contact Mr. Military, who left his info on your website email.

I like the idea of doing a write-up and publishing it - local news story. Better than transporting them long distance. Here's another idea. When I relocated from one province to another I contacted local TV station and they sent over a reporter and interviewed me. I got a few responses. I also went on KIJIJI and received feedback from that as well. I would up going with KIJIJI person who accompanied my cat on a flight.

I'd get in touch with military dude at r356 and find out whether he's for real, in case other options don't pan out.

I have booked a transport service that a friend of a friend -- who is a huge animal lover -- recommended. They are picking the cats up on the 31rst. This is the hardest thing I think I have ever had to do. I am heartbroken.

I'm so very sorry, OPB.

Big hugs to you, OPB.

Try to set up a video chat with your sister, now. So you have the kinks ironed out when the kittys get there. You can look in on them every day that way and they can see your face.

My cats are very fearful cats. They were both adult feral cats when I took them in, and they both retain their skittishness, even though they are affectionate with me. I know it will be months and months before they will let my sister near them, but she is very patient with cats, and I know they will love her in time. And I also don't fool myself into thinking that my cats love me for me; they love me because I pat them and feed them, which my sister will do. I don't need to see them; I will just be happy knowing that they are safe and protected and loved. Seeing them on a screen will do nothing for them, but will make me miss them more than I can manage. I will feel better once I know they are in their new home. Right now, it is agony.

Brian - I only found out about your thread when this one was created and I’ve checked in and posted a few times (short posts). I haven’t gone through all of the previous threads because I know where things stand as of now and I’m sure it would be sad to scroll through each treatment that didn’t work out in the past and the hope and optimism of everyone on the board being crushed each time. However, I do want to say before you leave us - your story is amazing leaving What I’m assuming was a high paying director job at Ralph Lauren to move and create for yourself. Not only to create as a hobby, but to create work that people around the world appreciate - seeing your work brings me joy simply because the nature of it is so fun. At some point I intend to get a piece at some point once I fix a few financial setbacks; likely after you go (although I’m sure the value will skyrocket and I’ll have to wait a while longer). Point being - you matter to people. You matter to us for having such a great spirit and care for others (and devotion to your cats). You matter to the people who get a chance to smile because they take a moment in a chaotic world when they see your work. And I want to say as someone who rarely cries, let alone about people I don’t know personally, this is really hitting my feelings - although my feelings are nothing compared to the ordeal you have been through. Cancer is a cruel bit*h and unfortunately she doesn’t care if you are a saint or if you are the scum of the earth. I hope that the stress of the cat situation is soon resolved. And I hope that knowing that you will leave a legacy of making people smile through your art for decades to come is some comfort, along with the fact that your creative passion in doing something you loved is responsible for that. Not many people get to make that type of mark. I know that I will take a moment to smile when I finally hang my piece on the wall.

We love you and we will miss you Brian.

- Will.

OPB, your sister can get several Feliway plug-ins and put them around her place. They emit scent-free (to humans) pheromones that are extremely calming to cats, and helps them adjust to new surroundings, stressful situations and the like. It might make the transition less challenging for them... and your sister. :-) Feliway also sells a pump spray that you can spray on the cat carriers, inside the van, etc.

Your vet might also be able to prescribe the cats some mild sedatives to make the journey easier. I know many cat owners who have done this when taking their feline friends on long car or plane trips, and it's worked out well for all involved.

Brian, can you send an article of your clothing that smells like you with each cat for the trip? That might help calm and comfort them.

R391, that's a good idea. My vet uses them for pet check ups. My big old strong male cat hates his appointments, tries to crawl up my head and stick to the ceiling but put him on a towel with the pheromones sprayed on and he gets very calm.

Brian, I'm really glad you got the cat transport figured out. What a relief. Your cats will adjust in time and your sister will love them because they are yours. They will be safe and cared for and you will have avoided the trauma that would befall them if they are there at the end.

Aww sorry Brian. My friend Rose just did the same thing with her cat Frank when she went into the nursing home. She got upset at first talking about him, but knows it was the best thing for him. She was laughing today to know that shy Frank swats his new doberman bro on the nose when he doesn't want to be bothered. Love you madly Brian.

What absolutely sweet messages. Thank you. I'm sending their bed and cat tree with them, so will have things with a familiar smell. I also have spray Feliway which I will give to the van driver to spray in their cage every so often. My sister loves animals probably more than I do, and has already loaded up on treats and Feliway and everything else she needs. She also has a huge house, so they will have a lot more room to roam than they do with me. I know they couldn't be going to a better place, but I am still very sad to be saying good bye to them, partly, I suppose, because it is a reminder that I will soon be shucking this mortal coil. After they're gone, there really is no reason for me to stay, although I will probably hang around and paint for a while.

R390. Will, thank you for the inordinately kind message. I'm really touched. I have been very fortunate that I have been able to do that which has given me joy, and have had the courage to try new things. I've always worked hard, and appreciate that I have been forge an odd path. Thank you.

@ have been able to forge an odd path. My kingdom for an edit button!

oh sweetie, i know this is so hard for you, Brian. I am so sorry this is happening. Get a back up plan too. I guess, the back up plan is your sister. What a fucking nightmare that you are going though?!

Hi Brian, glad you got that worked out. Must be a load off of your mind. I'm happy for you.

Brian, check this out. Music created by “a team of experts” to relax and soothe cats. See if yours like it.

Brian, just checking in on you. Hope things are as well as any of us can hope for!

I’m curious about insights or thoughts about the world now. I know politics and all that BS don’t matter now - but what does matter to you about the world now? Or does anything? I’ve heard concerns and thoughts narrow down to a much smaller range of things - personal health, weather, doctor appointments.

Thank you for all you’ve shared. Invaluable.

The cat transport is coming to get my cats tomorrow, which is sooner than I expected them. They want to make sure they can do the job before there are any more shut downs, or their drivers become ill. I am beside myself with grief. I can’t believe that today is the last time I will ever see my cats. I know they will be loved and taken care of, but I will miss them beyond measure. It is a good thing my doctor prescribed Xanax for the occasional bouts of anxiety, because I am not sure I could make it through today otherwise.

And what do I think about, R402? I know the cliche is that your life passes in front of your eyes when you’re about to die, and, although I can’t say that is true, I will say that I spend more time than I thought I would thinking about important moments and people in my life. I am not terribly sentimental and don’t usually spend a lot of time looking back, but, lately, I have been. I’ve been thinking about particularly wonderful and seminal times with friends and family that I don’t think I appreciated at the time, or, at least, I didn’t think they would have been as transformative as they have proven to be. A lot of them are just random moments, but they mean a lot to me.

I know that what happens in the world and in politics will not affect me — hell, I’ll be dead when the next president is elected — but I can’t stop my interest in politics and world news. So, no, my world and my interests have not gotten any narrower, although I sometimes wish I could stop being as affected and angered by what is happening. I'm not sure it i possible for me to narrow my interests or perspective.

Oh, Brian, I’m so fucking sorry. I know I’d feel the same about my cats if I were in the same position as you. It’s that barrier between species that means you can never help explain difficulties — even little things like vet visits, or injections. You are being selfless for them. It says everything about your character.

I wish I could be with you tomorrow to help you get through it, or words to make it easier. I’m thinking of you tonight here in London. I’ll keep checking in. Sending love.

Sean

I am so sorry for your Brian. How difficult.

Maybe it is the better thing to go through all the transport stress and grief now? Just think, they will be safe at your sister's home soon.

Love you Brian!!!

Ah Brian, it's heartbreaking to hear one of the sources of joy for you is leaving so early. But you are a good human for providing everything for them. I am hugging you so hard now.

Thank you OPB. Your clear eyed, pragmatic and accepting approach is one I can only hope to emulate. Peace.

Whispers of love to you Brian.

I will be thinking of you more than usual today, Brian, and sending virtual hugs from Los Angeles. I know it's traumatic, but I hope you will feel the loss of your cats less once they are safely ensconced with your loving sister.

Love to you, OPB Patron Saint of all DL cats

When I think of Brian I hear Jennifer Warnes singing Song of Bernadette. xxx

Sending you and your small furry friends virtual hugs today, OPB.

May their road trip be smooth and speedy (and stress-free for all), and may you soon breathe a big sigh of relief that they're safe and sound in their new home.

Sending many positive vibes for the cats. If you're lonely, OPB, come and sit by us.

We're here for you - You've done the right thing by them. That's what matters.

Love, OPB. Just love. Lots of it.

A difficult day, for sure. When are they expected to get to your sister's place? I'm so glad that the transport company was on the ball and recommended moving up the time frame - yes, hard on you, but it would be any day they left. But also better on everybody that they get there before arrangements could not be made.

We're here for you Brian, all of us animal lovers have a small glimmer of what you are feeling today. Let us help in any way we can.

Thinking of you today, and your kitties and your wonderful sister, Brian.

The cats are on their way to Boston. I will be greatly relieved when they are there, safe and sound, and getting treats from my sister.

How are you holding up, OP Brian?

Hey Brian -

You are welcome at R396. It really is the least I could say. I’m glad the cats are on their way but I’m also sorry that you are likely feeling pretty down today as a result. All my virtual hugs. Please keep us updated as to their safe arrival and upcoming plans for yourself (as always).

Keeping you (and the safe travel of cats) in my thoughts.

-Will

What a day for you. They are almost at your sister's.

"Come sit with us" (love this from other dler), to keep company and companionship.

I have a question for you: Could you get a home health care aide to help you, esp right now during this times? Maybe something you could look into?

Cats on Vacay to Aunties!

I am relieved that the cats are on their way to my sisters, but I will be anxious until I know they are there, safe and sound.. It might take them months to feel completely at home, but they will be loved and fed. Their comfort will come in time. They will adjust, eventually.

R421 -- I don't need home health care. I am asymptomatic, and feel completely fine. I know that belies what is going on inside me, but I am thankful that I am fully-functioning at the moment. Once I no longer am, I will pull the plug. I don't see a point in prolonging my life once I am not able to take care of myself, or when I start to have more bad days than good days. I don't fear death at all.

Though, you may change your mind. At least, you can get help with grocery shopping etc. I just spent $10 on toilet paper.

How long does the transport take?

Thinking of you Brian! And your fur babies!

Very calming and peace-inducing to read that someone is approaching the end in the way I hope to do so - but always doubt I will actually be brave enough to do. Thank you,

Please keep us posted, OPB.

How long is the transport expected to take? And do you get updates along the way or just once they've reached their destination.

Either way, sending hugs and support. As a fellow cat parent, I know how stressful this must be. That said, I was thinking: wouldn't it be a wonderful miracle if the cats actually settled in relatively quickly? I know they're former feral felines, but you never know. Cats are always full of surprises. :-)

My cats got to my sisters early this morning. The driver drover straight through from Nashville to Boston, which is a rather tall order. I am very thankful they are there. My sister said that they are sleeping in the closet of one of her guest rooms. I know it will be a while before they are comfortable-enough to explore the house, but the hard part is over. Thank you all for your encouragement and kind words.

Awww yay for the arrival. Will you post a photo of your cats? What are their names and idiosyncrasies?

PHEW. That must be an enormous relief, OPB! So glad to hear they're safe and sound and sleeping.

Both of my cats were adult and feral when I took them in, and, although they are both affectionate with me, they remain very wary of strangers. They were living in a restaurant dumpster when I found them. Skittles is a tiny little black cat -- whom I paint a lot -- and she is a sprite. She has tons of energy and personality, and follows me around the house crying if I don't pay attention to her. Waffooz is an orange tabby who is frightened of everything. It takes very little for him to run and hide. Neither one is much of a cuddler, but Waffooz always sits on the sofa with me. I say that the difference between them is that Skittles is a sidekick, and Waffooz is a companion. Waffooz is very vocal; you can have entire conversations with him. In fact, his original name was Walter Winchell, but he has a speech impediment, so he changed it to Waffooz. They are both sweet as can be. They loved my sister when she was here taking care of me after my surgery, so I'm sure that they will be be ok one they become familiar with her again. She has two cats already who are very good natured, so I don't anticipate any problem with them, and her house is large enough that they can all have their space. I am very relieved that they are there. And I know my sister will love them like no other because they will be her last link to me once I am gone.

Yay, Brian, what a relief. Closets are good right now. And glad that her cats are the easy-going type, it will make for easier transitions. I'm sure you are relieved right now. And give that driver a large tip for driving straight through!

Brian -

Glad to hear that you can relax knowing your cats are safe. And WOW props to the driver for going on a straight through trip. That must be one hell of a van transport company.

I'm so glad to hear that they made it!

I would be willing to tip the driver extra if you want into their Venmo.

The service itself was quite expensive -- $1800!!! -- and both my sister and I tipped the driver very well. I appreciate anyone who is working during this time, and hope everything treats service workers well.

YAY! They are safe and sleeping. They have each other too, which really sweet. Cats are curious types. It's like an adventure for them, really.

Now, what are you going to do for you?

Keep us posted on your cats and sister.

Keep us posted on YOU.

Love you Brian!

Hi Brian, mission accomplished. Sounds like your sister has a nice, large house. Also, I didn't realize your cats were already used to her and that they like her. That's about as much as you can hope for. Kudos to this delivery driver, making it happen. People like that can seem like angels (atheist here) at times like these.

Brian, how was their first night? And I sincerely hope you were able to breathe a little easier yourself yesterday. I know there's an emptiness in your heart, but you know they are safe and being loved. We love you, Brian.

I thought about your cats last night Brian and said a prayer to the Universe that they would settle in quickly.

I think all of us here are thinking about you and wishing you well.

Thinking of you Brian, hope you're doing okay.

Thank you all for the kind wishes. I feel a sense of relief that the cats have been moved. They slept on the cat bed I shipped with them last night, but I am not asking my sister for daily updates of their acclimation, because I know it could be weeks or months before they start to feel at home. I know it will take time, but I know they will eventually adjust. I'm just glad they are on their way to adjusting.

I have been getting blinding headaches. It mostly happens when I lay down, and they go away pretty quickly as soon as i sit up. The doctor ordered a brain MRI. It was scheduled for today, but I cancelled it last week. I don't think I have a brain tumor, because, if I did, I'm certain the pain wouldn't go away by just sitting up. At this point in my life, I would not take any treatment, especially for something in my brain. I will just learn to live with it, and know to sit up when it becomes unbearable. I will just grin and bear it.

Brian, I know you are not asking your sister for updates but are wondering if she offered any. Can you tell I'm bored?

And I forgot to ask, how are your headaches?

*wonders if it's sinus related*

Thank you, Brian's sister, for caring for his babies and for your loving devotion to him. We love you almost as much as we adore our dear Brian.

Hi, Brian. ((((((hugs)))))

Hello Brian, sending much love to you from England. My three cats are busy whisknetting support to your two across the Big Water as I type this. X

Brian if you're so inclined, please bring your sis on here for cat updates.

Me, and the Balloon Boys give you hugs and your furries purrs.

OPB, hope you're doing okay today. Please call your airlines back for a refund:

Airlines must fully refund airfare to passengers whose flights have been canceled during the outbreak of Covid-19, the U.S. Transportation Department ordered on Friday. It is receiving a growing number of complaints from people who say airlines have refused to pay refunds after flights were canceled, the agency said in a press release and an enforcement notice.

“The obligation of airlines to provide refunds, including the ticket price and any optional fee charged for services a passenger is unable to use, does not cease when the flight disruptions are outside of the carrier’s control,” the agency said.

The directive applies to domestic and foreign airlines for flights to, within, or from the U.S. It applies when an airline “makes a significant schedule change and the passenger chooses not to accept the alternative offered by the carrier,” according to the department.

The order threatens to add more financial strain to an industry that is facing severe challenges from a dramatic plunge in demand even as it prepares to start receiving $50 billion in loans and payroll assistance payments contained in a government bailout package.

As of Thursday, passenger traffic had fallen about 95% compared with a year ago, according to the Transportation Security Administration. Only 124,021 passed through security that day compared with 2.4 million on the equivalent weekday in 2019.

In response, airlines have canceled thousands of flights a day and cuts are expected to remain for weeks or longer.

Instead of giving passengers their money back, they have been told by airlines they would only receive vouchers or credits for future travel, the department said in the release.

The rules requiring refunds have been in place for decades, according to DOT. They have been enforced after previous disruptions to the aviation system, such as the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks and Hurricane Katrina in 2005, the agency said.

The trade group for major carriers, Airlines for America, issued a statement Friday saying its members are working closely with the government and Congress during the virus emergency.

“Since the early stages of the crisis, carriers have worked to increase communications with customers, as well as introducing travel policies to accommodate passengers during this health crisis,” the group said in a statement.

The trade group didn’t directly address the extent to which U.S. airlines have been unwilling to make refunds or whether any carriers are changing their policies.

Initially, the government is giving airlines the opportunity to comply with the law on their own, the Transportation Department said. “However, the Aviation Enforcement Office will monitor airlines’ refund policies and practices and take enforcement action as necessary,” it said.

It's on Bloomberg. com, but DL won't let me link

Although British Airways initially just offered a credit for the flight, they ultimately offered a full refund on the ticket once they cancelled all flights. I had bought a ticket to see The Seven Streams of the River Ota at the National Theatre, but they would only issue a credit for a future ticket. I don't mind that, though, because I think of the lost money as supporting the arts, which I do anyway. I would have loved to have seen the play.

The cats seem to be settling in. One of them -- the more dauntless of the two -- is already roaming around the house, while the more skittish one is still hiding under a bed, and only coming out for food and treats. It took him months and months to get comfortable with me, so I suspect it will take a while for him to get used to my sister's house. The important thing is he is safe, loved, and fed. The rest will come in time.

I am struggling a little bit this week. The tumor in my back is acting up again, and the pain is pretty bad. I can take a steroid to shrink it, but it does a number on my liver and kidneys, and has diminishing returns. I will grin and bear it, and use mediation skills to help me not think about it. I have dilaudid and oxy, but I don't like taking them. They make me feel tired and spacey, and I would rather feel pain than spacey. Here's hoping the pain goes away soon.

Warm hugs Brian

Hi Brian, so sorry to hear about the pain you've been going through. Pain meds can also cause constipation, ugh. Hope you can find some entertainment on YouTube, Amazon Prime, etc. Paul Simon has been posting stuff on YouTube. Here's "American Tune," which is one of my favorites.

Good to hear about the one cat getting used to your sister's house!

Lots of love to you.

Funny that you posted American Tune. I coincidently listened to it the other day, and was particularly touched by the line "We're alright, we're alright; We lived so well so long." I'm not a huge Paul Simon fan -- I think too much of his writing comes from his head and not his heart -- but that song is a stunner. Thanks for the link to that version.

Brian, for some reason, I thought you might like the song. Glad you did.

Hello from London again, Brian. Thinking of you over here (at 1.30am!). I hope your heart isn’t too heavy tonight. I’m so glad your cats are with your sister. Sending you love.

It'snice that your cats have each other. I am sorry to hear that you are experiencing pain. That's terrible.

Take Care, Brain.

Sleep and Rest!

Hi Brian, just thinking of you and your cats on this cloudy L.A. day. Many hugs.

Hey Brian, I was the one that said it was tough love, but you needed to get your cats out ASAP. I have a dog that I love dearly and realize there is no one that will take her if I die. I've even made directives that if I die she is to be put down. I understand what you are going through and how hard it must be to continue your journey without them. You did the right thing, but you need to let others do the right thing for you. Ask your sister how they are doing. Facetime with your cats. Do something that is going to be uplifting to you. You have already shown the person you are by rescuing two feral cats and the affection they have for you. They miss you as much as you miss them. They don't understand what is going on. Let them see you or hear you for them to know everything is going to be alright.

JFC, r457, leave Brian alone about his cats already. They are safe with his sister and it is none of your business whether he asks about them, Facetimes with them, whatever.

R458, some of us think it's ok to ask Brian about his cats, showing that we care about him and his family. I hope he takes it that way or tells us to stop. But until he does, what would you prefer we talk about? The insanity that is our life today? No thanks. R457, there are options other than death for your pet if you die first. Give us a bit of information about where you live and I'm sure one of the readers on this thread will have an idea for you. The shelter I was volunteering for up north used to arrange for future care if someone wanted it. Basically an agreement that was left in a prominent place in the owner*s house, say the fridge, and notification to the vet on record. Some vets will also do this service. Please think this through.

Go fuck yourself R458. The best love you can give your pet is to make sure they will be OK after you are gone. Sorry, but the fact is Brian was dragging his ass about the cats. Any other time would have been OK, but we are dealing with the coronavirus and there was a good chance his cats could not be transported. You are a fucking idiot R458. When I was in the hospital my dogs, from what I was told, have it soothing to hear my voice. You obviously know nothing about the relationship between people and their animals.

*found it soothing

[quote] [R458], some of us think it's ok to ask Brian about his cats, showing that we care about him and his family. I hope he takes it that way or tells us to stop. But until he does, what would you prefer we talk about?

R459, there is nothing wrong with mentioning the cats, as in, "Hope they're doing well" or "Sorry they can't be with you." Repeatedly popping in here to BITCH at OPB about the cats is a different story. Mr. "Tough Love" has been banging on for some while now about what Brian should be doing about the cats, and how he's melodramatic and selfish for not handling them the way Mr. TL would have. And now that the cats have been successfully transported to Brian's sister's, this asshole is back once again, insisting that Brian needs to Facetime with the cats despite Brian's explicitly stated wishes not to do anything like that? Enough already.

[quote] Sorry, but the fact is Brian was dragging his ass about the cats. Any other time would have been OK, but we are dealing with the coronavirus and there was a good chance his cats could not be transported.

Which did not happen and wouldn't have been any of your fucking business if it had happened. Give it a goddamned rest already. And now I will shut up and stop fucking up Brian's thread.

You're an idiot R463. Brian stated he was going to give a week or so to decide about the cats transportation and I said he didn't have the time. Not my business. Brian made it my business when he posted about it. It is none of your business what I post here.

Thanks R459. Too long of a story to post here.

[quote]Repeatedly popping in here to BITCH at OPB about the cats is a different story.

Okay, look, you and the guy going on and on about Facetime need to STOP. This thread isn't about either one of you.

I know that Dataloungers like to find one person and bitch at them incessantly throughout the course of a thread, but try to control yourselves and not do that on this thread, okay? Just both of you put each other on ignore and stop derailing the thread.

Other than that, Brian, how are you doing? I hope you’re staying locked down and getting to paint. Take care of yourself. I hope you’re not too bored.

I agree with r466. If there’s one time to not bash each other, it’s this one. Brian, I hope you’re doing ok. I know you must be sad to not have your cats around, but I hope you’re at least able to do some things that give you pleasure in your daily life. Are you able to take walks, or at least paint? What can we do to help? (Virtually :)) can we suggest some ways to help?

I hope you're following him on Instagram.

Why, R469?

OPB here. Thanks for the continued kind words. I am fine, and my cats are being taken care of. Thank you.

Glad to hear you are ok Brian :) hope the incessant need of some dataloungers to bitch and moan- even on one of the threads where you would have to be certifiably off your rocker to do so (and possess little to no taste) is not getting you down. How’s your back?

Thanks Brian for the message on Instagram! So glad the kitties caught a ride..and are safe.

r458 - Thanks for the laugh. Some folks are well meaning but....yeah.

Yay Mr. Military! And we follow OPB's Instagram to see his art and to support him.

HI Brian, I just wanted to check in on you. Hope you are well.?!

Mad hugs to you today, Brian.

Ah, thanks for that, R477 and others. I vacuumed today, and felt very guilty when I vacuumed up an errant clump of cat fur here and there. I know it is stupid, but it made me feel incredibly sad.

Brian, I love your new painting "Determination" - immediately brought a smile to my face. Wonderful!

OPB, don't feel guilty, kitties are well and adjusting. Give yourself a pat on the back for being selfless enough to get them set up right now. A funny story that you brought to mind. I had been putting off purchasing a new vacuum, even though my old one was really not doing much of anything. I finally broke down and got a Hoover WindTunnel, and we were joking that that thing could suck a star out of the sky it was so powerful. Well, imagine my surprise when I cleaned out the dust bucket for the first time and found lots of black cat fur, when all we had in the house for the last 6 months was an orange and white dog. In my defense, we had moved some furniture and I was able to get at some spaces that hadn't been vacuumed in a while. After I was suitably aghast, we laughed about it for a while. Our beloved kitty (who had passed at a *very* old age) wanted to remind us she was still boss of the house, and never to forget it. How are your headaches, Brian? I hope they have eased.

Happy Easter to all who celebrate! As my Jewish friends remind me today is Eastover! Hope you are well, Brian.

Hi Brian, how are you doing? We're here not doing much. How are the kitties?

OPB here. I am doing ok. I don't feel any better or worse than I have in a while. I suspect I will start to feel a decline soon, though, but I have decided to not pull the plug until the quarantine has lifted somewhat, so it will be easier to clean up after I am gone. If I were to do it now, I realize that it would be a mess, and it would put people in harm's way, so I will sit tight until it is safe for people to move around and travel. I do hope that I will still be reasonably well at that point.

My cats, alas, are not doing great. One is doing better than the other, but she is the more dauntless of the two. Although she hasn't completely acclimated, she does walk around a little bit, and has let my sister pat her. The other one will not leave his spot under the bed other than for food and litter duty. I suspected that would be the case. It was months and months before he let me near him; he is the most timid cat I have ever encountered in my life. Cats are resilient -- and my sister is patient -- so they will eventually get acclimated. It will just take them a long time.

Thank you for checking in, and I hope everyone is safe and sheltered and healthy.

Sorry that the cats aren't acclimating as quickly as we had hoped, but you are the expert on them and you knew it would take time. But they are safe and will find a way to live in harmony with your sister. I'm selfishly relieved that you are going to try to hold out until this quarantine business is better.. We want you around as long as we can have you with us. Thanks for checking in, Brian. As us old Catholics sometimes say, may peace be with you.

Brian, you are so considerate of and kind to other people, even now. Caring about the "load" on others.

Adopted cats can take forever to get used to something new. Even moving house with the same owner takes getting used to (for the cats).

*pops in* Hi Brian! *hugs* Hope you're not feeling too lonely.

I hope you are doing well, Brian.

My birthday was the seventeenth and I turned forty-six.

When I blew out my candles my wish was peace for you.

That was really sweet, Warren. Happy birthday to you.

Gay Man Spends $2000 on Traveling Pussy Show

“His love for black and mulatto pussies was well known.” say source

What are you doing today, Brian? I have been thinking of you, a lot. And your cats too.

You cats have each other. It is nice to hear that you think your sister is patient and understanding, while they adjust.

I think you have a great approach to this, take it one day at a time. When you say pull the plug, what do you mean by this?

Oh r490, have you not been keeping up on these threads? It means what it means.

Maybe I missed it, but were you able to get the pills needed for that, Brian?

My friend who was terminally ill with cancer began the arrangements to get them. It was a great comfort for her to know they were there if she needed them, but getting them was a process that took several weeks. She had a choice to have them administered or to take the dose on her own. In the end she didn't use them, but knowing she could if she needed was reassuring.

We discussed it at length and I fully supported her choice, as I do your choice, whatever it may be. A positive about that option is having a choice and some control if things get too bad.

I wish you peace of mind and comfort always, your courage is an inspiration.

I was able to get what I need, R492. It took months and months, and a lot more money than it should have, but I was able to find some. I don't know if I will need to use them. One of my doctors still thinks that one of the tumors will cut off circulation and kill me very quickly fairly soon, but another thinks that I still have a long way to go. In other words: they don't know, and I don't really expect them to. Every situation is different. At least I have the means to escape pain should it present itself. In the meantime, I am thankful that I still feel mostly unaffected. I hope everyone is safe and healthy.

i looked it up. They say it is fast and peaceful. you have all bases covered now. I also support your choice. I think there are groups around this.

Are you ordering any fun and interesting?

That's good to know, Brian, and that you're still mostly unaffected and have methods for escaping pain.

OPB, you are so right about cats adjusting and giving their heart away again. I adopted a 4 year old female 3 years ago and she rejected me at every turn. At night she would sleep in her bed next to my pillow, but If I placed my hand in her bed to pet her, she would attack wildly and hurtfully. Just over the past 6 months she's decided she loves me and stays with me night and day if I'm available, she sleeps in my lap while I watch TV. She's just a relaxed loving cat. It takes times, but they do opt for love.

OPB, I hope all is well. Sending love and good wishes.

Hey OPB, how are you? It's been a while.....

Hello OPB, sending you good vibes and best wishes...

(also to everyone in this thread)

Hello OPB, sending you good vibes and best wishes...

(also to everyone in this thread)

Brian, we love you. I just wanted to say that.

Aw, thanks for checking in. The last week has not been good. The tumor in my back flared up and I was essentially unable to move without incredible pain. It was a good 10 out of 10 level. I had to have a steroid IV just to get me to be mobile, and it worked a little. I'm now on a round of heavy-duty steroids to help shrink the tumor and the pain is still pretty bad, but, at least, I can move. I finally asked for a fentanyl patch today. The overall pain has become a bit too much to be comfortable. I hate surrendering to a patch because I know it will never come off -- and that I would like to think that I am stronger and more determined than the pain -- but it is needed at this point. Walgreens is out of stock on them, though, and, here's hoping, they get them in soon! Thank you for checking in, and I hope everyone is doing well. These are trying times, aren't they? I don't know how anyone can go through them without experiencing some level of stress and anxiety. Best of luck and health to you all.

OPB, are you getting through this flare-up on your own, or are friends available to provide support/assistance?

Yes, R503, you're right. I've been wondering this same thing.

I'm not at all religious, Brian, but I've taken to meditating/praying every night to quell my anxiety, and you and your cats have factored heavily in those meditations/prayers.

I wish you a good journey. It's one that we're all going to make some day, and I hope yours is peaceful.

Aw, that is very sweet and thoughtful, R504. I do have friends I can rely on if I ever need them, but, for better or worse, I am fiercely independent and tend to face most tings on my own. Even when I had to go to the hospital every day more months for chemo and radiation, I went by myself. I mostly don't even tell the people around me or my friends when I have bad days, because there is really nothing they can do to change it, and it will just add to their worry. This is the place I come to when I need to vent, so thank you for the outlet. I have mediated daily for about the last 20 plus years. It is hard to say whether it works or not, because I have been doing it for so long, I don't know how I would feel if I didn't. When I meditate, though, I don't seek knowledge, nor do I pray to gods; rather, I just seek a place where the universe and my place in it just cease to exist.

@meditated, rather. I hope I live long enough to see an edit button on here!

[quote] When I meditate, though, I don't seek knowledge, nor do I pray to gods; rather, I just seek a place where the universe and my place in it just cease to exist.

Hey Brian, I meditate also. I'm interested to know what you mean by this, the part after the semi-colon. Do you mean you seek to lose your ego? TIA.

Thinking of you, Brian. I follow you on Instagram and love your art. Always makes me smile!

Thank you, R508. Painting is my happy place, although the back pains have not made it that easy to get there lately!! R507: It is almost like sleeping, but not really. I don't know quite how to put it in words. Maybe it is like losing your ego? Or maybe getting to a point where you're just not conscious of anything, yet you are? There is a sense of peace and tranquility. And there is a place you sometimes get to where nothing matters. I use the primordial sound technique.

I've heard it described as being "in the flow," Brian.

Thank you for checking in OPB. I am so sorry to hear about last week. I guess you got your kitties out at the right time. Are any of your works in a gallery? Maybe in the future, the old shriveled black heart of DL can visit and do a little toast to you.

Yes, R511. I'm in a number of galleries. Dalls/FW. Nashville. Charleston. A few others. I sell most of my art through online galleries, though -- Saatchi, Zatista, etc -- and, surprisingly, I have sold several paintings in the last few weeks. I would think that people would not be making unnecessary purchases given the uncertainty of the economy, but, perhaps, because they are spending more time at home, they want to have something new to look at? I am surprised. And grateful. Also: before the virus, I sold considerably more in Europe than I did in the states, but the opposite has been true lately. It makes me think that Europeans might be less optimistic about the fallout of the virus.

OPB, I think people might be buying more of your art right now because it's so bright, fun and joyful, and who wouldn't want something bright, fun and joyful adorning their walls? Especially when self-isolation means people are looking at their walls a LOT more than they did before. Your work instantly brings a smile, and the world is craving that kind of stuff right now more than ever. :-)

Sorry to hear about the pain. Hope this week is going a bit better for you and that the fentanyl patches are restocked soon.

Thank you, R513, and everyone.

OPB, any update from your sister on the kitties? Are they getting to feel more at home?

Thoughts are with you, Brian

Brian! There you are, we were starting to worry. Sorry to hear that you're in a rough place with the pain right now, and I hope you will soon have medicinal relief.

In the meantime, if and when you're feeling down and lonely, just glance into your monitor/screen and know that you have a load of clamoring DL friends and admirers on this side of the screen, all climbing over each other just to get to the front to wave and give you big WWs and smiles.

Try it, you'll see. Man, it's crowded in here!

Friends of OPB, I know a lot of you don't like FB, but DL does have a page there. I am serious about visiting a gallery with OPB's works and having a toast, so let's check in there when we need to.

Many big hugs to you OPB, the Balloon Boys are headbutting you right now.

Good to hear from you Brian. Don't feel bad about the patches, my MIL is 100% happier and more engaged when she's on them than not. It makes pain one less thing to worry about and let's you enjoy the moment. Many hugs to you from NJ.

Would someone please post the link to OP Brian’s website with his art? I know it’s been posted before but I can’t find it.

TIA

Here you go r520:

Hope you are having a nice day/week. Just checking in to say hi, Brian.

Love you, Brian.

There is a painting of yours Brian that I am interested in. I am assuming, since it is listed at both sites, that it is shipped directly from you?

R524. Yes, the paintings are shipped directly from me, and that is one reason I prefer online galleries to brick and mortar. If a painting is at the latter, it can only be seen by the few people who are in the gallery, and the painting is, essentially, out of your hands. Selling online through multiple platforms allows the paintings to be seen by more people, although the online galleries take their percentage, which I don't begrudge them. Despite being in some great brick and mortar galleries, I sell significantly more paintings online.

Thanks Brian.

OOh r524, you have to show it to us if you purchase it.

Here is the link to it R527.

That is a good one!

Thank you. I hope you get it.

The one thing that is holding me back R529 is I'm not familiar with acrylic paintings.

What do you need to know about acrylic paintings? Acrylic paints have been around for decades, if not longer. They dry much more quickly than oils. They're water-based.

I'm use to oil paintings R531. It is more the visual I'm curious about.

R531, I've painted in oils more than acrylic. Brian probably does lots of acrylic and he can probably chime in.

FWIW (with my limited experience), I'd say acrylics, unless watered-down quite a bit, have a more opaque appearance than oils.

At R528, it looks like there is some type of varnish on the entire painting, giving it a wet look. Without a varnish, I'd say acrylics tend to have a drier (less shiny) look than oils.

Thank you R533.

I use both acrylic and oil paints. They have very specific purposes, but, in general, I much prefer the former. There is a huge difference in quality from one acrylic paint to another, though, and the cheap ones don't have the color saturation that good paint has. I use the best paint possible -- mostly Golden -- and the saturation is excellent. I will admit that I don't take very good photos. Although all my paintings are varnished, black and red paintings photograph "shinier" than they really are. I also use my iPhone camera, and that sometimes exaggerates tonal differences. The painting is much "smoother" in person.

Although commercial acrylic paint was not available until the early 50's, I would say that most paintings you see in a gallery now are acrylic. If you google some of your favorite paintings of the last 50 years or so, chances are it is acrylic.

Oh Brian I hope you weren't offended by my post. I love the painting. I'm just use to oil paintings, so I wanted a little bit of info on acrylics.

OPB I wanna give you giant hug!!!

[quote] FWIW (with my limited experience), I'd say acrylics, unless watered-down quite a bit, have a more opaque appearance than oils.

I was talking about watered-down acrylics as a legit technique, i.e., you can paint in a watercolor style. You can also water down your acrylics to do a version of the Venetian style of painting (layers of transparent / translucent applications with some opaque), which is usually done with oils.

R536 -- No, I was not offended even in the slightest!!!! Thank you. Most people don't know the difference between oil and acrylic. I've only been painting for ten years, and I assure you that I didn't know the difference when I started, or the difference between one acrylic and the next.

R533, I've painted in most mediums but now almost exclusively in acrylic. You can get real depth of color by layering, a technique also used in oils. You build your color slowly, first starting with one thin layer of color than going over it with another color until you built the color you want but it's made of multiple colors you can see through the layers. You can layer around eyes or a particular part of you the painting. You can get deep, rich texture that way and it can sometimes be hard to tell an oil from an acrylic. Because acrylics dry so quickly is why I like them especially for this technique.

And of course, you can also make them as flat and opaque as you choose.

Well I made an offer on the painting. Now I sit and wait to see if it was accepted. I looked at both sites and the difference is commission is why I went with the one I did. It sounds corny, but the painting spoke to me. I have a dog that was terrible hurt by a vet and with surgery and rehabilitation...she will never be the same, but I love her and she has defied the odds.

*terribly

Thank you Brian for accepting my offer. I want you to know that painting is going to a good home that will cherish it. The message of "determination" exemplifies what my dog has gone through the last 8 months.

Hi Brian, first time poster in these threads but I think of you often. Love your paintings.

R529 Looks like I am the proud owner of "determination."

Congrats R543 I love Brians work and wish I could afford to buy one of his paintings.

Thanks R546. If I had not received the economic impact payment (stimulus check) I would not have been able to buy it.

r528, I am crying right now (MARY)-thank you for your back story.. So happy for both you and Brian. Can you put up a photo of your dog?

Also Brian, what search brought you here to our crazy Datalounge?

R545. Aw. That means the world to me. Thank you. Saatchi sent me notice that it was sold, but I don't have any more information, but it will be sent out as soon as I do. I'm really touched. Thank you.

Well R548 I took my dog in for a growth under her tongue. They gave me back a dog that could not get up or walk. None of the vets helped me and one even said "sometimes things are a mystery." I took her to a vet I had gone to years ago and demanded they do an x-ray. I took me 6 weeks and over $6,000 to find out they had dislocated her shoulder and hip. They can't do anything for the shoulder, but she did have FHO surgery on her left hip. She is almost 15 years old and considering everything she is doing really good. This video was taken a little over a month after surgery. She is actually walking much better than that now.

*It

r550, how horrific! She's a lucky doggo to have you. My friend used to give her elderly dog glucosamine for his joints and swore it helped.

Your link doesn't work though.

It is google photos R552. I've never linked to it so don't know if you need a google account. She is on the glucosamine/chondroitin. Hopefully this link will work R552.

Link works! Awww what a love. What kind of dog is she?

And Brian, how are your cats doing with your sister?

R550. Can you send me a few photos of your dog, to the email address listed on my web site? Thanks!

Thanks for asking R554. She is a Chow mix. Brian, didn't mean to hijack your thread. I fought so hard for this girl so I completely understand what you went through with your cats. I don't think I have your website Brian.

I got your email address Brian.

R556 - glad you were able to buy “Determination”, your dog is absolutely adorable and I’m sorry she had to suffer so much - she clearly is walking with determination :)

Brian, glad to hear you are still with us and in good spirits.

Also R556 - it may be tedious and may be rare, there are veterinary malpractice laws in many states.

That is why the painting spoke to me R558. She's a fighter. I contacted the Veterinary board and we had a hearing R558. It is too lengthy to go into, but he lied. He was carrying her and put her down on the ground just outside of the doors. He told me to take the front and he would take the back, which I did. We carried her to the car. He claims he put her down on the ground and she walked to the car. They sided with him and I think one of the reasons is because it took 6 weeks to find out what happened to her, not for lack of trying on my part. I'm still looking into suing him. One of the other vets at the practice falsified her medical records and said she was missing most of her teeth, she has all of her teeth and said she had trouble getting up when in reality she couldn't get up at all.

R559 - the falsification of records should be easy to prove and even the vet board should have seen that. It is just baffling that a group of people (the board) who all likely have pets of their own will side with a fellow vet rather than think of if their pet was treated like that. I’ve always said that harming my cats is one of the few justifiable grounds in my mind to actually hurt someone and gladly wear the handcuffs afterward. In this case, there is a better recourse - we willingly entrust these people with the care of our animals and the vet board should realize that these are people who it is essential for us to be able to trust when we walk in the door. PLUS - both injuries smack of excessively rough treatment on a dog that (from the video) seems to be as happy as can be (even post injury). It’s possible they thought that they could handle a senior dog the same was as a puppy but that is STILL incompetent. Sorry for the diatribe - animal abuse, mistreatment and especially malpractice enrage me.

Brian’s painting really is a perfect fit. But then again, Brian’s artwork is amazing and I’m pretty sure that no matter who you are/ what you are going through that at least one piece will speak to you.

I’m glad to hear she’s getting better still :) is she near getting 100% yet or is there a ways to go still?

Thanks for asking Lovewill. The vet that did the surgery said it will be months and I know she will never be 100%. He was amazed that one week after surgery she was putting weight on the leg. He said he has had dogs that won't put weight on the leg for more than a month after surgery and they don't have the dislocated shoulder to deal with. She can't get up on her own and I don't think that will ever be possible. Just yesterday, with assistance, she was able to take baby steps on my stained concrete floors. It is a very slow process.

At least in my state hearings with the vet board are a two step process. The first step is you testify. You don't get to hear anyone's testimony and they don't get to hear yours. When they were making their ruling, which I have an audio of, they let it be known that the vet and I disagree on how Mocha got to the car. The feeling was they pretty much already had their ruling before the meeting ever took place. The second meeting is once again my testifying and in this instance the vet didn't testify, which why would he since they already ruled in his favor at the last meeting. The second meeting they just upheld the verdict of the first meeting.

One of the cases before mine was against a vet that through negligence a puppy died. This was the second time a dog had died under his care. He got a $200 fine and probation. My vet, I found out he was found liable for a dogs death. It was sad because it was a 12 year old dog and the people were uncomfortable with him doing multiple procedures, but he assured him he could do it safely. He got a $100 fine and, this is the kicker, if he couldn't afford the fine he could make arrangements. Even going to the Veterinary Board you really don't get justice. With Mocha I have spent $15,000 seeing specialists, MRI, ultrasound and X-rays and rehab. No one said hey if you can't afford it you can make payment arrangement. If I didn't have the money I would have had to put her down. As a matter of fact before any procedure was done they wanted their money upfront.

Sorry Brian for hijacking your thread again and sorry for being so long-winded. Believe me Lovewill I have thought multiple times that I would love to harm him as he has harmed Mocha.

What a tale of love for your "girl", r556. Truly heartwarming.

Changing the topic for a second but prompted by your "determined" baby, ...I had to bring one of my cats in to see the vet today (kind of an emergency). As I was waiting outside the vet office enjoying the sunshine, a lady sat in her car staring straight ahead at me, it seemed like. So I busied myself, looking around at people, trying to kill time until the vet assistant came out to take my cat. A few minutes go by, and the vet assistant goes over the lady's car and suddenly the door opened and the two women stood quietly talking standing outside the car. The next thing I knew, a little pink bundle passed me carefully wrapped and tenderly carried by the vet assistant walking back into the office. I smiled at the cuddly little bundle being so lovingly cared for. But something was off. The lady, bundle's mother, is not following. I stood there and looked at the lady who was now back in her car. I looked the vet assistant, with her little bundle gone. Then I looked back at the lady again. She put her head on her hands which were grasping the wheel and she silently wept. For about a minute. Then she drove off into the busy traffic. I stood there feeling so sad for her. Anyway, this is a TL:DR but I felt like sharing on this thread.

OMG R562. I cried over that. I wonder if this is going to be the new normal where we wait outside while they tend to our animals. I could not imagine haven't to put down a pet and not being there for them.

I know r563. I had to get a grip as I was outside, waiting for the vet to come out for me. It was very emotional to see a person suffering, losing her little baby, in this time. I can't explain it. I had tears, so heartwrenching.

What a heartbreaking story, R562. I had to put my dog down in July, and I simply couldn't imagine if I hadn't been there to love him until his final moments.

And, oh, Mocha's person. I am so sorry that you and your girl are having to go through this. I don't know why someone would become a vet if they didn't love animals, and do what they could to treat them honestly and with respect.

If you look into vets it is frightening Brian R565. There was another case where a vet grabbed the persons dog by the leg and swung it around their head and finally threw it on the table and dislocated the dogs eye. Guess what? They got a fine and was still able to practice. Sorry to be such a downer about this, but it really has opened up my eyes. I had no idea a vet could be so abusive to an innocent animal. And what is more frightening, there doesn't seem to be any real consequences for their actions.

I have to say the more I learn about the medical profession I'm surprised any of us are alive, human or animal.

Sorry for the lose of your dog Brian. Do you know how the cats are doing with your sister? I understand it might be painful to talk about them.

Jesus, that's just awful, R564.

I can't even imagine.

:(

That sucks r564, so sorry you had to experience that. I had a similar experience- I had to take my cat to the vet (on Easter), and while I was waiting to be admitted, I saw a lady running out sobbing, holding an empty collar and leash in her hand. It was heartbreaking, because you knew exactly what happened. Unfortunately, that day I had to put my cat to sleep, my poor guy. Why can't pet animals have longer lives?

Sorry that this turned morbid. OPB, we do love you and thank you for bringing class, art, a tiny community, and heart into this mean old world.

My vet has said R568, paraphrasing, it is unfortunate our pets last for such a short time and yet our relatives go on and on. I thought R568 this might be morbid, but it reinforces our beliefs that people care for animals. The stories are hard to hear, but if someone cannot shed a tear for the emotional situation someone is going through that says a lot about them.

Oh and BTW, it was a painting by Brian that brought this discussion about our pets and how much we love them and how we can sympathize with someone losing their pet.

Mochas Person R570 - I can understand why it took the stimulus check to get the painting at this point - 15K out the door over a cruel veterinarian. ESPECIALLY when everything is upfront. I’m happy to have my cats insured through Banfield (on the maximum plan) and our local team really is excellent. I nearly cried when I found out my first vet there was moving to Australia. It’s the one bill I always double check to make sure has cleared even though the money is in the bank. However, hearing about this with Mocha and the other dogs- will make me much more vigilant in an emergency situation or something would require me to go somewhere else. I’m reading up on the vets at our local emergency hospital as I type.

Also, it really is true that Brian’s thread, through quite a period, has caused usually caustic DL to not only be compassionate toward him, but each other, and our pets - learn about art, and so much more.

R564, R568 - There actually is a whole thread now on putting pets down in the COVID era. I don’t know how to link threads and even if I did I’d hesitate because it is heartbreaking.

And to Mochas person in R561 - those thoughts about the vet now also apply to the vet board x 10 because they are permitting what would already land me in handcuffs on a mass scale. It’s a joke - 100, 200 dollar fines (on a payment plan, as if Vets are broke) and probation? What I would do to someone who harmed or negligently caused the death of my cats would land me MUCH more than a 100 dollar fine and would not be a probation eligible set of offenses.

OPB @ R565 - Exactly - I mean I know compassion isn’t a class in vet school but why choose to pay for that degree if you lack it for animals? I mean, I’m sure some animals act like dicks when they are scared or in pain but - that should be all the more reason to be compassionate in itself, they are in distress. They can’t tell us what’s wrong and can only show us certain things via actions. In contrast, I understand the MD who loses compassion after having to deal with decades of humans actively being dicks and cursing them out when trying to help, I also believe they should leave practice if they do lose the ability to be compassionate. However in the case of an MD, if you dislocate someone’s hip and shoulder, like what happened to Mocha - you are going to lose everything you have: freedom, license, money. If you are a vet, apparently you can harm an animal with impunity and have nothing happen. Hell, the vet could have a bad day and take it out on one of our loved animals and walk away with a 100 dollar fine on a payment plan, it’s sick.

I'll get yelled at for this I'm sure, but the lady who is trying to make the thread about her and her dog is the same person who was scolding Brian for days on end about how "upset" Brian was making her because he was "in denial" and that pissed her off, personally. Then with the situation with transporting his cats, she was saying he was "stupid" and "melodramatic" and "hurting" his cats, yelling at him constantly for all his supposed "mistakes." If anyone asked her to tone it down, she'd start cussing and flipping out.

Can we maybe dial back the massive praise for her? And possibly reassess her motivation for turning this thread into a whole thing about her dog?

Brian, have you ever done a painting with lots of doors (different colored ones floating on the canvas)? I was watching a show called Bargain Mansions (home reno, I think on HGTV) and the decorator was putting a canvas on the wall that reminded me so much of your art that I did a double take. If you are curious, it was a current show (2020) and my DVR taped it sometime this week. It's already been deleted or I would give you more info.

On another subject, I see we are getting close to 600 replies, I hope someone will link to part 4 when we close the gap. Hope you are pain free, Brian. Take care.

R572 you have way too much time on your hands. What I told Brian, when he was thinking of having his cats transported, is he didn't have weeks and he should take up the persons offer to drive his cats to his sisters. Because everything was changing rapidly I did tell him he didn't have weeks to make a decision as states were implementing a shelter at home and a service may not be available to transport his cats. I understand it was a rough decision, but it would have been worse if the decision was taken out of his hands. Who the hell has to time or inclination to go through someones comments from weeks ago. I don't come here for praise or for people to like or dislike me R572. I'm sorry you think I was making this about my dog. I just mentioned that the painting spoke to me because of what my dog had been through. And it ended up a discussion about vets and a very important discussion. I don't have the time or desire to go through all your posts R572 or others posts.

Hi OP Brian and others: Didn't mean to upset you or cause waterworks with anyone else, but I stood there yesterday feeling helpless, witnessing this incredible real life harrowing situation. But that little pink bundle caught my eye. It was in a fetal position, tiny (body of very tiny dog or cat), wrapped in what was likely his or her favourite blanket. The image is forever seared in my brain. For a split second, I wanted to go over and speak to the lady (mother of bundle) and say "I know what it's like, I know what it feels like, I know it's hard...." But it was not the right thing to do.

Here's hoping anyone else with a pet illness is coping all right.

It takes a minute to "go through all your posts" -- I remember your nagging. Skipped the overly long posts about the vet as it was not very important..

Go fuck yourself R576. You sound like a miserable person that craves attention that you will never get.

Wow. I know that we can all be a bit prickly, so I have been happy and surprised that this thread has been mostly free of the nastiness that can prevail on DL. Can we please refrain from mean-spiritedness and name calling and judgement? We're always going to disagree with someone, but can we keep the name calling and unkindness to ourself? I don'tI expect everyone to act like Pollyanna, but we can do better than name calling, non? Thank you!!!!

You have an unhealthy obsession with Brian R576.

R579, just stop, please. R576 made a statement; you responded. It's finished.

Why don't you tell R576 to stop R580? You people here are unreal.

Because OPB appealed for peace, and you just kept going. Just stop. Please.

Good Morning Everyone: A cool Friday for May I must say. Hope you, Brian and everyone here are feeling okay and looking forward to a quiet, peaceful and enjoyable weekend, away from the "everyday madness".

Personally, I love Brian's Black Cat painting. I have a black cat, Harry and it is just like Harry!

Checking in as well... it’s going to be rainy and crappy today, so I’ll be indoors. Hope you’re ok, Brian.

It's a beautiful day where I am. Hope everyone is as well as possible.

Hello everyone from sunny and warm West Hollywood. Sending positive thoughts and hugs to all, especially OPB.

Sunny and gorgeous out, but unseasonably cold here today. Just got home from a long (brisk!) morning walk. Hope everyone has a lovely Friday!

Oh, these are the Balloon Boys (color is a bit altered for social media):

How many of us are staying in most of the time? I swear I can go five days without getting in my car, or even going further than my front porch to get the mail. I had to go do Home Depot yesterday for some shipping supplies -- I sold a bunch of paintings, to Europe -- YAY! -- and was shocked at how crowded the roads and Home Depot was. Nashville is slowly reopening, and it looked like it was two days before Christmas, that's how crowded it was. It was insane! I doubt I will leave the house for a while, but I am incredibly fortunate to be able to work from home, and I can get what I need from Dick Blick online.

I haven't been out in at least 2 weeks. I always contemplate going out for a run through Beverly Hills, but my street in West Hollywood is chock full of people walking their dogs, family, gardeners and construction workers without masks on.

I don’t leave my house except to walk the dogs, and my weekly shopping trip. I used to shop for food every day and never had food in the house. Now I’m set for a couple of weeks.

It is very cold here, and we’re expecting rain. My mood is very tied to the weather and I notice I am lethargic lately, but grateful to be able to work from home.

Yay Brian for selling paintings to Europe!

I'm getting more lethargic by the day, too. I used to go out every day for a walk, then it was a few times a week, and this week I haven't been since Sunday. I do take a walk around the block once or twice a day, or do an errand in the immediate neighborhood, but that's it. I don't have a car, so I don't go anywhere I can't walk to, and I'm too sleepy all the time to want to get out.

It's a beautiful day, though chilly and breezy, here, so I should make an effort. What stops me is that there are always too many other people out there for me to worry about. It's not crowded, but as a perpetually vigilant person anyway, I'm really tired of having to scan as I walk in order to plan whether I should get off the sidewalk, cross the street, or stay on my path. It's not a huge deal but it makes me anxious.

Yes, **big congrats** to Brian for selling his wonderful paintings to lucky folks in Europe.

Thithithmy favowit thwead evah.

LIZA, R594?

You are a well-respected artist Brian. This is why your pieces are selling. Hope, you are doing well?

Hi Brian, I googled to have a look at your work because i really like the one above with the three kitties! What interesting art! I wonder if you have done or thought about making some childrens books? Your work be be wonderful in them.

Hi Brian, I googled to have a look at your work because i really like the one above with the three kitties! What interesting art! I wonder if you have done or thought about making some childrens books? Your work be be wonderful in them.

Hi Brian, I'm in Northern CA and it's been in the 80s the past few days. Will start to cool down again soon and I got some gardening in.

Blue jays are nesting in a tree right near my patio. It happens every year and when the babies get close to leaving the nest the parents get very aggressive and attack my cat. They scream at him constantly and hop around within 18 inches of him and dive bomb him and nip the end of his tail. He lays there all helpless and gives out stress meows unless he comes in on his own or I go get him. He's usually out for just a few minutes before the noise gets to be too much.

Once the babies leave the nest my cat is on lock down. The babies are vulnerable for a few weeks. While they're learning to fly they flop around in the bushes and can't get up higher easily. I did some research, the young birds stay with their parents through fall.

Other than the bird drama I'm not getting out much. Did stop at the nursery and was surprised by how busy it was. You could not get into the parking lot until someone left.

Post 600. Adios!