Todd of Vaguebook

HA! Oh I am going to love this thread. Todd on!

Sharing because I believe this is in the spirit of Todd

I'm here for this!

Todd has been misjudged and disrespected yet again:

[quote] If people don't have enough respect for a person to even engage them in a polite conversation before passing their judgments, then they have no business making those judgments in the first place

If people only knew Todd's life story and everything he has to deal with, the world would be a nicer place.

Oh Todd! You coy son of a bitch, let us in! We just want to love you!

r2 That's a good one. Any posts capturing the spirit of Todd most welcome, thanks!

R4 ...Todd says as he judges them.

You know what r8,? If you can't handle Todd at his worst, you don't deserve him at his best!

Todd is very humble and wise...

I feel you Todd...

Is Todd giving himself a reminder or aiming at another unnamed offender? It's unclear of course, as he provides no comment/context.

[quote] 19 minutes

[quote] My ex wife has been talking to Satan about how to be more evil.....I wonder what she is chargeing him.

Poor Todd. He can't even spell.

Good plan, Todd. Keep talking shit about your kids' mother, that should earn their love.

Watch your mouth, r16. You have no idea what I'm worth:

Even Todd's selfies are vague. He usually obscures himself with sunglasses and being out of focus, or half his face cut off, or colors manipulated into something that doesn't look like a photo. He never smiles. It's always a mean mug or a cool pose. He has some selfies with his kids (blurry, of course) where the corners of his mouth are slightly turned up, and that's as happy as he ever looks. Real Men Don't Smile.

I posted a comment on the other thread about druggies posting shit about their kids' being their "reason for living/light of their lives" even though the kids were taken away. This one is the female, druggie version of Todd. Today she posted this: "Calm her chaos, but never quiet her storm." Also this gem: "Having a good heart can put you in some fucked up situations." ( like overdosing in front of your kids?) I think this one may be my favorite, because why look within when there is always someone else to blame: "Hostalgia: rage that derives from never being able to get things back in your past that you feel nostalgic about; anger over the irretrievablility of the past, esp. when it was ruined for you by someone else." Yes, it HAD to have been someone else's fault, Jenni.

The meme I like that addresses that r19 "Everything happens for a reason, and sometimes that reason is you're stupid and make shitty choices"

Yeah, Jenni sounds like she's cut from the same cloth as Todd. They have that "good heart" thing: all of my problems are because I'm just TOO GOOD for this world!

Here's another meme along those lines courtesy of Todd, who carries the weight of humanity on his shoulders:

Gawd r21, he's a real Holden Caulfield, he is.

Such stoic selflessness the world has never seen, R21. Here's another recent Jenni gem: "The Devil whispered in my ear, your (your!) not strong enough to withstand the storm. Today I whispered in the Devil's ear, I am the storm." Truly a legend in her own mind. I really wish I could show you guys a pic of Jenni. She looks exactly as you imagine. Somewhere around 35 but looks 60. Bad teeth and skin. Lots of creepy methed-out selfies featuring her blue and pink hair, pics of her pitbull, and old pics of the kids who were taken away several years ago.

You mean this one? It's also one of Todd's profile pics, lol!

R24 GTFO!! Is Todd a drug addict too??

Possibly. He holds a job and everything but I heard he got a DUI recently and his mugshot is online. I know he used drugs while partying but that's when i briefly knew him years ago. I assume he still uses but maybe he's the "functional" type. Part of his whole persona is that he has some dark past with drugs when he was growing up "in California" (I forget where, cuz it's flyover, CA which is why he always says "I'm from California" even though he's lived in our little nothing state since he was 16-17.) He obviously has stunted social development so damage was done early.

.....

Why do these losers have to drag me into their bullshit?

Todd quotes the great thinkers.

Someone should probably tell dearest Todd that it isn't really a beacon of machismo to quoth Demi Lovato.

Todd watcher - Thank you for these threads - they are truly a beacon of light in my dark night of the soul.

Ok, seriously, I’m loving this because deep down I’m an awful person. My one question - is Todd his actual name, or have you changed it to cover your ass a bit? Because it is PERFECT!

Sounds right, r30, which is why I'm sure he doesn't know who Demi Lovato is. I'm guessing it's too troublesome to look up a quote source. The image of white on black in angry ALL CAPs matters more. Plus it's about not trusting people, which is one of Todd's favorite themes.

r31, No. Todd is not real name. It's just thw name that popped into my head when I decided to start reposting him on DL.

....

,...............

Why do the self pitying cunts who create those things never know how to use apostrophes or actually spell?

FFS.

Todd's the boss!

[quote] Lol more like me being sober

[quote] Confused

Need. More. Todd.

Jennifer Smith is feeling sad 😔

Is she pulling any sympathy , r40?

Todd and Jennifer, if you please! Also, I fucking HATE people that use Jack Sparrow, Harley Quinn and any incarnation of the Joker but mainly the Leto one.

Todd loves Jack Sparrow. It was his Halloween costume a few years ago.

I actually know an old balding doofus who seems to think he looks like a cross between Johnny Depp and RDJ somehow. I'm sure he's waiting to be discovered in a drugstore just like Lana Turner.

R44 Don't you love it when people tell you what celeb they think they look like? "People tell me I look like..." Sure. Sure they do. R42, Jenni actually got a job! She is a service tech at an oil change place. So her posts have been fewer lately. Maybe things have turned a corner for Jenni! She did post a seemingly recent picture of her daughter that was removed. The poor girl looks to be about 9 years old and is sporting a mullet.

Jenni's going places! I wonder why she removed her daughter's pic, though....

As for Todd, his last several posts were more pics of his kids from 3-5 years ago with comments like "miss em." No idea if he hasn't seen them recently or what. No explanation on what his "evil" ex wife actually DID recently, or what was supposed to happen in "19 minutes", etc. Todd seems to throw out a line and see if anyone bites. If he doesn't get enough likes/comments, or any at all, the questions one might have about his mysterious posts remain unanswered.

This creepy doughy 33 year old Backstreet Boys fan I know appears to have meth face.

[quote] Jenni's going places! I wonder why she removed her daughter's pic, though....

That would be because her daughter didn't invite her to her wedding. Seriously

[quote] How i feel today

Todd does NOT apologize for who he is.

Todd is adored by the innocent:

[quote] Reminds me how my kids look at me

Todd has been hurt by every single person he has ever encountered. They are all shit to him.

Relationships are hard. Everyday isn't a good day. Some days you are in the fight of your life. Other days you are on cloud nine. Be patient. Love yourself and your person through it. Just don't give up

I love my Grand dogs (2 pitties)

Oh Jennifer. You have two enabling death wishes.

r55 ha! yes r54, I should have known Jenni was pit adjacent, by the daughter who doesn't even like her, I bet. I hope she never pit sits, it could get vicious.

Todd has some hard advice for you all:

[quote] Sometimes you just have to get real with yourself and decide what you're willing to accept and what your not willing to accept from others, or get used to disappointment.

....

My guess is Todd is surrounded by disappointed people.

Todd's kids are almost teenagers. His constant world of hurt is going to get worse when the two adoring innocents stop looking up to him if they haven't already.

Todd is "feeling inspired"

[quote]When someone does something you didnt expect, and it made you realize something you missed about them and its inspiring to be surprised and humbling that you thought you had everyone figured out and were totally wrong. Eyes open.

I'm guessing somebody stroked his ego today and therefore didn't disappoint him. It's only a guess though, because of course Todd doesn't say who he's talking about or what they did.

Todd has this exact, same, stock image tribal tattoo. He has some other ones but I forgot what they were.

A fucking flash tattoo? Ugh.

^ No. It's permanent.

[quote] When someone does something you didnt expect, and it made you realize something you missed about them and its inspiring to be surprised and humbling that you thought you had everyone figured out and were totally wrong. Eyes open.

I love how incomprehensible his writing is.

I glean more from Google transliterations of tweets from the feeds of my Japanese friends (who barely speak English).

Oh sorry r64, I didn't mean flash as in temporary, I meant it as in gutless, the shitty designs they have in books and on walls that everyone gets so everyone has the same shit.

3/11/18

[pic of his new girlfriend with his kids]

Beautiful day, with my beautiful girls.

3/15/18

Todd is already suspicious of his new girlfriend.

[quote] Interesting read

Good grief.

3/15/18

Someone crossed the line with Todd, yet again!

[quote] Truth

This is an award winning thread btw.

3/15/18

Some bitch obviously can't see how perfect Todd is.

[quote] Riiiigggghht

3/15/18

Getting alot harder to be a nice person these days, to few supporting arguments anymore.

3/16/18

Todd is hungover, most likely:

[quote] Thissssss mf

3/16/18

Todd knows a narcissist when he sees one.

3/17/18

Todd has higher priorities than you, bitch.

[quote] (pic of Todd's kids) Miss the reasons I do what I do. Time to get it done.

3/17/18

Todd's phone is probably ringing off the hook, now:

[quote] Im shutting down social media for a while, here is my phone number in case anyone wants to get in touch with me. 555 555 5555 Thanks

Ha r75, meanwhile Todd would bang that chick in a New York minute!

^ Exactly. My guess is that Todd thinks his gf should stop posting "sexy" selfies now that she's with him.

This thread is priceless.

I feel like Todd would post this.

A Todd-like person would post that, yes. Our specific Todd has not...yet.

This seems Todd-esque

Has Todd found anyone who can appreciate his whole journey yet?

What's Todd up to?

ONE PERSON MAKING THESE POSTS???

No. I've made some but nowhere near all. Use your trolldar settings if you don't believe me.

More Todd!

how’s Todd holding up in this cruel world?

Todd lasted about two weeks "shutting down social media" before posting this image to remind everyone of his superiority over the rest of us sheeple.

A couple weeks after that he posted pics of his new (much younger!) girlfriend and has been proudly including her in posts with his kids.

But don't worry, in between the gf and kid posts are more insufferable memes about how people should conduct themselves, like "Pracrice what you preach or change your speech."

Todd is not prone to mood swings and rage, he's just full of PASSION. The rest of you are dead.

[quote] Like this alot

I wish that I could feel things as deeply, as honestly, as Todd.

Many on the DL might like Todd inside them, quite deeply.

Yes, Todd is sooooooooo deep.

Oh this again...sweet

Im over this bs

"Actions show you who someone really is. Words show you who they pretend to be."

ha! oh Todd, what has the cruel world done to you now? I wonder if his inbox fills up with "what's wrong?" I would ignore or laugh at him.

^^ LOL. Actually a couple have asked what's wrong and he replied "its (sic) not work." But won't say what it is of course, which means it's most likely that his 22-year-old girlfriend of four months (who lives with him and his dad) has pissed him off again.

I noticed Todd's friend list has decreased by 20-30 over the last few months since I began paying attention to him. Not sure if he unfriended them himself or they got turned off by his posts and, like I should do, unfriended him because they aren't close to him anyway.

Interesting...

Thanks for the update, Todd Watcher. I needed a laugh today!

Todd has "Left Job" at the car dealership.

He has unfriended his girlfriend.

He has updated his banner to pic of himself on a white pony, wearing sunglasses and not smiling.

Todd's newest ex-girlfriend is now "In a Relationship With Mashed Potatoes."

A couple hours later she posted:

[quote]i don't understand why people need to do drugs or party in order to have fun, have you tried mac n cheese

I have no idea if she's talking about Todd or what. She's not even on my friends list. I don't even know her. What am I doing here? It's Friday night and I'm Facebook sleuthing the life of some vaguebooking douche I hardly know anymore. Who's more laughable, me or Todd?

Todd also unfriended his dad some time ago but I'm pretty sure he still lives with him.

NEVER feel pathetic, Todd watcher. I, for one, am fascinated by Todd and the drama that surrounds him. It’s fucking hilarious.

Todd watcher, you and Todd, and you watching Todd--- you are onto a winning combination. Well I appreciate it anyways.

Love your work, OP

Is it wrong of me to hope for bad things for Todd just to see how facile he can be?

Todd's mood swing has corresponded with Colto's this time!

r103 a literal pony? Like on a beach Fabio style or in a petting zoo or what? Ha!

^ Looks like a stable, petting zoo background. His two daughters are in the pic, too.

[pic of two preteen girls]

[quote] My reasons

Happy Mother's Day, Todd!

If Todd isnt hung like a mule there is truly zero reasons to have him in ones life. Im exhausted by him and I only see whats posted here! By the way,is he cute, OP?

Link to Todd's Facebook???

Todd is indeed exhausting. His Facebook posts from the past week allude to on-again-off-again drama with his young girlfriend, or whatever she is to him, and being ready for a new job vs. being fed up with all the bullshit of the universe. I'll post some of it verbatim for your entertainment soon.

As far as what he looks like, think Matt Damon / Leo DiCaprio variety blandness. I haven't seen him in many years, and any pics he posts on Facebook are as vague as his posts: blurry, sunglasses, face half cut off, far away, filtered or enhanced to technicolored oblivion, etc. He tries so hard to obscure his true self at every level, yet betrays himself constantly. It's cringey and painful to see.

Sorry, I'm not linking to his profile.

I don't blame you for not linking it r116, but you better be better about updating us! I would like my Todd news at least weekly!

C’mon TW, I’ve been feeling a vague sense of dissatisfiaction, like I’m not appreciated despite my deeper understanding of the world and our place in it. I need to know that someone else feels the same. Post that shit.

r118 I feel like you could use an edgy Jared Leto as the Joker meme about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer. Or maybe a Jack Sparrow drunken debauchery meme. I am sending that out to you in my thoughts.

5/10/18

Excited for the future and a much needed change.

I knew it! I knew he did Jack Sparrow memes! I know his ilk.

Yesterday at 11:06 a.m. [quote] You know what really sucks, when something is bothering you and you cant talk to them about it.

Yesterday at 1:55 p.m. [blurry pic of Todd in sunglasses making the universal douchebro limp-wristed two finger symbol and his girlfriend doing Sparrow Face] [quote] My girl and me being stupid ha!

Yesterday at 4:36 p.m. [quote] Sometimes it all just hits you and you realize your not ok with any of it.

P.S. Todd has refriended and unfriended his girlfriend at least twice this week. Currently she's unfriended again.

P.P.S. Yes, he loves those Johhny Depp pirate memes. I'm pretty sure I posted some in the original thread.

You should be there for Todd! Something is bothering him and he doesn't feel like he can talk to anyone about it...

Todd posted this a few days ago with no comment. So when you think of leather boots with skull buckles, you should think of Todd, and you should tremble with fear, respect and awe.

In the About section on Todd's profile:

[quote] I would rather talk about who you are?

Anybody want to field that one for analysis?

ha at those boots! I love it.

Todd and his ilk have that ComicCon/LARP thing where they are VERY imaginatively invested in corny superhero and action movies. It’s an adolescent quality. But really, is life better when you think of yourself as the star of an epic struggle, battling enemies and winning fair maidens, even if you’re living with your parents and make a living oiling the weiner rollers at 7-11? Only Todd knows.

I heavily suspect R126 that Todd is one of those guys who falls in love and becomes deeply committed within the1st 2 hours of the very first date. A young woman might get swept away by that,but an older gal sees it for the desperate emotional leechiness it truly is.

I'm getting a Scorpio/Pisces vibe from Todd. As in, he's a Pisces who would like to be a Scorpio. He's touchy feely and prickly and he wants you to be utterly fascinated by his mysteriousness. But he probably spends his dates talking about himself.

I wonder if, just for a split second, the irony ever dawns on Todd that he's constantly airing his feelings about not being able to air his feelings.

ha! r131, truth!

[quote] I miss my kids, love them so much.

I believe Todd is unemployed at the moment as he announced a couple weeks ago he left his job. I wonder if he was fired.

Wait, where are his kids?

^ He is divorced and they live with his ex wife. I believe they visit him on the weekends.

Poor Todd. I bet every last person he knows hates him.And he seems to be completely oblivious to that fact. Either he's mildly retarded or deeply delusional.That being said,hes caught my interest!

Our Todd is a car salesman, isn't he? The last car salesman I dealt with was a conspiracy nut and didn't seem to know much about the car. I thought he was pretty bad at his job and wouldn't get too far. But Todd is a lot older. So he must have some talent that way. What else can Todd do for work?

OMg r130 YES Todd is every pieces male ive known!

I always wonder if these dads who lament about how much they love and miss their kids are telling the truth, or if they just say things like that out of societal pressure to sound kind and loving. I don't think the innate parental bond is as strong in fathers as it is mothers, and Todd is self-centered to the point that he really wouldn't have much leftover time to spend concerned about anybody else. Unless these kids know how to feed his ego, would he truly miss them all that much?

You always have these dads who go on and on about how they'd do anything for their kids and yet their actions usually suggest otherwise. "I miss my kids, I love them so much" makes him sound good though, especially to any single fraus on the prowl.

Yeah R140, like an equivalent to having a cute dog. But Todd is stuck with children so I guess he is making the best of it.

I wish I had a snake instead, that gets lots of attention too.

I think the types r140 is talking about play the roles doting dad without any real engagement in their kids lives. They see that men who have children are meant to be supportive of them but they really don’t have a clue so they go into this über emotional play acting on social media. It’s all a con and if it makes the ex wife look like she’s not allowing him to see his “reasons for living” all the better.

16 hours ago:

[quote] I feel incomplete And ny thoughts wont stop reminding me of it.

Yesterday at 12:10pm:

[quote] Lets make $$$

Manic?

[quote] I know a good Salesmanager Anyone looking?

Todd for hire is the name of my new band!

Todd is such a rugged individualist, it must be hard for him to get a regular job and follow the rules.

Todd doesn't play by anyone's rules, even his own! Also, why would anyone want to hire a kook like him with his passive aggressive posts to his ex, his difficulty in communicating, his messy personal life, etc?

If only the Trump administration knew of Todd. He'd be a great fit.

Is Todd a recovering addict?

Why can't Todd punctuate and spell properly?

[quote] Is Todd a recovering addict?

See r26.

[quote] Why can't Todd punctuate and spell properly?

I believe he dropped out of high school around 10th grade and got a GED later on.

Am i really so awful? ~Todd

[several comments telling him he's "amazing", etc.]

I ment like a person, am i an awful toxic person? ~Todd

[more comments saying he's "fantastic", etc.]

Say, hold off on hiring that guy we saw yesterday. I see this guy Todd is a sales manager and he seems to be well liked and not a toxic person!

Aww, poor Todd almost became self-aware.

The thing that gets me the most is his age.HOW could someone reach their 40's and think thats how grown people act ??? Is he "autistic"? I cringe for him !

If he was attractive, his pitifulness would actually be kind of cute and endearing. But average/ugly guys acting vulnerable are just... average/ugly guys acting vulnerable. Nothing special, which is what Todd aspires to be.

Sadly the world is full of Todds

Agreed r157. This is teenage stuff. Nobody should be pulling this shit beyond sixteen, it’s pathetic.

I kind of wish I had my own todd to watch, though.

I just wanted to say I block this thread every time it comes up in my feed, purely for the obnoxiously smug tone of the "Todd watcher" creature in the OP. That is all.

Oh okay, thanks r162, calling someone a "creature" is a sign of humility and not being smug though.

Todd found your thread, OP!

Todd wisdom:

[quote] You will never know how close to fixing the problem you may have been when you quit to soon, and you will never fix anything if you listen to people say its not possable that have never been there. You will just end up in a bad place with regret.

Whoever Todd is addressing here, may or may not be on his Friends list...

"5/18, 5:35am: Its difficult to not talk to someone at all that you used to open your eyes too everyday.

5/18 4:44pm: A glimmer of light in the darkness, that's enough for a chance."

Oh god,he's one of THOSE guys! not only does he fall deeply in love a half hour after meeting you,then he stalks you hoping that you'll give him "one more chance".

Todd bump

Todd IS a vampire:

[quote] I get to spend the day with my beautiful daughters and soak up some much much needed love.

And do his daughters get to soak up some much-needed love too?

No, I didn't think so. Only Todd gets to have love.

[quote] I just watched lego batman with my kods and made association's with my life...thats not healthy

God! He can't stop talking about how broody and badass he is, even with Lego movie associations.

EHAT gappens in the LEGO movie that could possibly parallel Todd’s life?

I think it's the batman aspect, r173, why he couldn't just use the original Batman to reference is a mystery. I guess because he wanted it to be known that his daughters were actually with him today.

[quote] EHAT gappens

Do pull yourself together, R173.

[quote] I guess because he wanted it to be known that his daughters were actually with him today.

You mean, his kods.

I need to follow Todd’s example and choose my words carefully.

Todd's idols, posted with no comment.

r178 Those pussies? God, Todd is lame.

[quote] True change comes from knowing the reason is worth it.

I wonder what the reason is. Oh god, that's what he wants, isn't it? Everyone to ask him about his mysterious ways.

Does Todd sport “spiritual” tattoos in an unknown language that he thinks say “soul warrior” but may in reality say “dry clean only”?

^ No, he has a tribal tattoo as shown in r62 and IIRC a skull and some other cliche crap. It has been a while since I've seen him. I do remember he was somewhat embarrassed about them and I almost never saw him in short sleeve shirts.

Wait r183, so you know Todd in real life? I guess you probably said if you did, it was just in another thread. Man, you're like a celeb now too by association, did you guys go to high school together? How old are you/he?

We've already established hes not great looking and emotionally stunted,but has anybody confirmed the dick size yet ? He's got to be hung big,otherwise why do people keep putting up with his stupidity ? Come now OP,no wet bathing suit shots on his profile ???

Yes, I've mentioned a few times that I know Todd personally but I haven't seen him in many years. He was more of an acquaintance I'd met through other friends in my early 20s. We're roughly the same age. When I joined Facebook, like most people I found all these friends and acquaintances from the past and that's how he got on my friends list.

r185, I'd love to post Todd's photos but fear that'll point to his identity. Besides, he doesn't post clear photos of himself anyway, as I described in r116. They're heavily filtered, manipulated images. I wish I could post, but won't.

Todd's comments and quotes revolve a lot around other people dragging you down or getting in the way of your happiness. He's always the victim, but he's a warrior too. Nice self-awareness.

Can you tell us who he looks like, then? I know you don't want to post photos and I don't blame you but who does he resemble?

^ See r116.

[quote]He's got to be hung big,otherwise why do people keep putting up with his stupidity ?

Oh, c'mon. I don't know why people put up with the Todds of the world, other than for the point-and-laugh factor, but how many people in any man's life are concerned with his dick size? Sex partners/potential sex partners, okay (though I don't think that many straight women consider a big dick a priority) but it's not as though Todd's friends and family are thinking "ugh, he's such a douche, but I guess I'll stick around because he's so well-hung."

[quote] I choose patience today.

Please tell Todd to hang in there. We’re trying to live up to your standards, Todd, but it isn’t easy. We can’t all be you!

When his daughters get older you can look forward to those ridiculous, redneck-y rules for dating my daughter memes: "she may be your conquest but she's my princess and I have a gun and a shovel" type shit.

Todd wooing a mysterious target.

Todd is spiritual.

Todd is a patriot.

Todd has a warning for you.

I hope his mysterious target doesn’t have a clue about the difference between your/you’re or that meme will grate on her eyeballs r194.

Is Todd warming up to his big reveal---he's a Deplorable?

^ He is deep down. He's mainly ignorant about politics and made a lot of posts during 2016 about how he didn't care about the election and is focused on his FAMILY and being a good person, etc.

His constant misuse of your/you're makes me cringe.

More turbulence for Todd:

If Todd found his rainbow, he'd denounce it for being gay. Storms are manlier, no?

Todd’s rainbow has skulls at the end not pots of gold. Manly but sensitive skulls, skulls that see the hatred all around but manfully toil onward for the sake of their beloved kids that they take to McDonalds for an hour every second Sunday. That type of skull.

Still contending Todd is a Pisces wannabe-Scorpio.

People only throw rocks at Todd because he SHINES:

Jesus what an obscure meme! DO people throw rocks at shiny things? Perhaps mentally challenged people but that is frankly something I have never heard of.

You bitches just arent evolved enough to truly grasp the complexity that is TODD.

That is certainly true.

Not sure though about the word evolved. Or even the word complexity. Bitches, yes.

^ Oh yeah?

[quote] Not everyone is what they want you to beleive they are and those people are damn good at making you think the wrong things about the right people. Wake up

Oooof! Thanks, Todd. I needed that.

Haha! r203 and r204.

Todd doesn't concern himself with the opinions of you sheep:

R213 Stolen.

[quote] When your gut tells you to let it go.

I honestly thought that was about a bowel movement at first.

I've got a real hothouse flower, all breathy like a Gothic heroine. Lots of trailing ellipses at the ends of her plaintive pleas for wuv. I'm afraid that if I quietly drop her she'll just positively wither from the stress of it all.

Sample laments:

"My heart is breaking to pieces..." "I can barely breath..." "I would give you my heart, if you'll let me into yours..." "If I died, would anyone care?" "I just don't know anymore..." "Do you hate love?" (my personal fave)

She has zero meaningful interaction with anyone. Zip. There's no sense of her being anything other than a tear-stained wet rag. She claims to have kids, but I can't imagine anyone putting up with her. I just have the biggest urge to say, "Bitch, write in your fucking diary!"

r217 is she Kelly Osbourne?

"I mean, I'm not gonna be IGNORED, Dan!"

Another in her endless litany of gripes: being ignored, not being acknowledged, not having her affection returned in a 1:1 ratio.

"I'm fading like a flower!"

What is the name of your Gothic hothouse flower, please?

She has two first names (seriously) and her last name is cribbed from a superhero (oy...).

Today's Hot Topic lament: Why does my heart care so FUCKING MUCH?... This follows whip-wielding Catwoman imagery. Jesus, this chick IS the distaff Todd.

LOL, r222. Todd and his spiritual twin sister are veritable goldmines of attention-seeking vaguebook schmaltz.

Todd KNEW it. He knew it all along.

"We wear masks at our job. We try to hide our imperfections. We pretend we don’t have problems at home. We pretend we are more confident in our position than we really are.

We wear masks with our friends. We mask the debt we’ve incurred to pay for a lifestyle we can’t afford. We mask our insecurities. We pretend to be closer to certain friends than we really are so that they can help us achieve our goals or ambitions.

We pretend to be more spiritual, more put together, more mature in our faith than we really are. We fear that if anyone knew the real us, they would think less of us…so we mask our brokenness.

We wear masks at home. We pretend things are okay in our marriage when there is distance. We say nothing is wrong when our feelings are truly hurt. We don’t necessarily lie to our spouse; we just shade part of the truth. We don’t feel comfortable being our true self with our spouse because we are afraid of judgment or ridicule.

The thing about masks is that they never bring us closer to who we were created to be. Friendships. Marriages. Families. Churches. Everything in our lives get cheated when we choose to be fake.

It takes courage to live with no masks. What would happen if we stopped apologizing for being honest with each other and started expecting and accepting authenticity? What if mask wearing were a thing of the past in your life?

Just thinkin..."

"The pain inside, trying to stay, but want to..."

—Duchess RavenWaves, currently on deathwatch and presumably breathlessly wandering through the mist of a gothic graveyard with Evanescence haunting her earbuds.

^ Is that the Gothic hothouse flower?

No way he wrote r225. He copied and pasted it from somewhere and added the "Just thinkin" at the end to make it seem authentic. So he basically put on a mask to post about not wearing masks. And he's not even good at wearing masks in the first place.

Todd has Inception of the brain.

Something tells me that Todd has at least one daughter named Harley Quinn.

And another named Jezebelle.

@227 Yup, it's her. The mascara is really running this week.

I believe you're correct, r228. It's pretty obvious. Some people have commented and Todd has thanked them, but has provided no source for his material.

To any and all who are on thin ice with Todd.

P.S. Todd's friend list just passed 300 again.

Fuck, he is more passive aggressive than a teenage girl. I HATE TODD.

I've been hating him for a while now. I'd have already unfriended him if I wasn't addicted to Datalounge.

Oh, don't unfriend him, OP: his drama-queen postings are too amusing.

OP, sometimes you dare to hope for other people to do the right thing. Then they don’t, and you’re reminded again of why you can’t count on anything or anyone.

First rule of Todd Club: don't cross him or he will UNMEET you.

Todd, forever shackled to The Wheel of Pain, his suffering but a mystery to us all.

Is he really named Todd ? Or is he Godd ?

Fuck you, Todd.

- you know why

[quote] Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

Gothic Heroine's updated cover photo. "Doesn't ANYONE care?!"

Oh god R243, you don't how often I've wanted to send that question off into space, via Twitter.

My sister has a version of Todd in her FB friends, but he doesn’t have kids. Despite being not bad-looking, fit, owning a nice home and his own successful business, Bryan is always single. Which he cannot understand because he is a Nice Guy.

He posts photos of his cat (to whom he is quite devoted) often.

As usual, people remain clueless about all the ways they piss off Todd:

R245 That Todd has a micropenis.

Fuck you Todd, you never learned to love.

Is Bryan an "incel", r245?

"I don't know how long I can hold my emotions anymore, I can't take it!"

I have it on good authority Todd violated his DUI probation and has a sentencing coming up in a few weeks.

Meanwhile most of his Facebook feed lately is reposts of "this day [blank] years ago" pics of his daughters and lame memes about keeping a positive attitude.

The vampires are sucking Todd dry:

[quote] Beware of those people who seem to come into your life when your down and extend what seems to be a helping hand, they are not always what they would want you to beleave, they will tell you what you want to hear, deceive you, slowly start to sink their fangs in and poison you to death because they are toxic people and they prey on certain types of people. Once you discover thier lies unraveling you better watch your back because you will see a totally different person then you thought and they will discard you for the next victim just like that and isolate you from anyone you might want to warn about them. Thats how they operate. Beware. They only show up in your life when your vulnerable.

Todd seemed to have found a new car sales manager job for a couple months and made a lot of posts about how "he" was hiring so contact him for a job. Now his most recent post says:

[quote] Im looking for a new job anyone know of anything let me know

Todd does seem to have a set pattern.

Oh! This is bad news. Todd may not be able to post to FB for a while. We won't be able to read his very unique analysis of what it is like to be in custody.

“Beleave”?

^ Remember, Todd is only semiliterate.

And yet he spelled 'deceive' correctly.

Todd feels more deeply than the rest of us. It’s his blessing...and his curse.

Any updates on our Todd, he of the deepest feelings?

Yeah, I’ve been wondering about Todd, too. What’s he doing? What’s he thinking? What’s he FEELING?

Best thread ever.

this struck me as very Todd-esque.

There must be a few Todds out there R262.

Will todd survive gaol? He struggled with normal life...

Todd is still unemployed. He posted this a few days ago:

[quote] Im looking to sell this bed its a california king slay bed, its a comfortable bed, in good shape, was probably 3000 grand when i bought it all new, im looking around 750 for frame mattress and box springs. Or best offer. Lemme know pm me.

Somebody commented: I dont need your "slay" bed

Damn ! When your selling everything you own on FB youve officially hit rock bottom. Poor Todd ! Will he be able to muster the strength to go on ?

Man r266, you don't know much about Todd do you? Here is where he would insert a meme about haters underestimating him. Don't be one of those haters.

I kinda felt sorry Todd when he posted his bed for sale but on second thought noticed he just HAD to mention he paid 3k for it and also, he should be putting it on Craigslist or some local classified site, as some of his friends commented. It made me remember how when I knew Todd in person years ago he definitely was the type to boast about material things, how much something cost, etc.

Don't feel bad for him r268, if he were that hard up he would be out hustling and not posting on FB. People who actually have to work for a living probably don't post like he does.

[quote] sick of it all

YHthis creepy fat guy I used to work with is trying to sell a sex you on Facebook. I think he stolenit he’s an ex druggie.

OOPs I meant a sex toy. I’m not great at typing. Usually he posts inspirational quotes and bad selfies

They walk among us.

Wow, imagine all the fuckin’ Todd did on that bed. Gives me shivers.

Yeah like Todd gets laid that often!

Has Todd been sentenced yet? I don't even remember the crime. Last I heard he was selling his worldly goods and preparing himself for incarceration. Any updates?

Todd, ready for human bondage. Stoic in the face of adversity. Hardened by injustice.

Ohhhh R277 I love you.

That is TOTALLY Todd r277.

[quote] Has Todd been sentenced yet? I don't even remember the crime. Last I heard he was selling his worldly goods and preparing himself for incarceration. Any updates?

He'd violated a DUI probation somehow. I don't know if he drove with a suspended license or didn't turn up for the court ordered AA meetings or what. But I'm told he has to spend one night in jail every week for the next couple months.

He just started a new job at another car dealership, though. Not as a manager anymore, but as a salesman on the lot. Before this he'd gotten fired from two jobs earlier this year for mouthing off to his bosses. I got that as second hand info.

He can't drive himself anywhere so his dad has to drive him everywhere. And from what I remember his dad is kind of a sad old drunk, so here's hoping HE won't get a DUI while taking Todd somewhere.

Also Todd's 22 yo girlfriend moved in with Todd and his dad to help them pay the rent since Todd has been out of work. She's an overweight, not-so-bright, homely sort of girl, now semi-supporting a fortysomething, alcoholic, narcissistic, barely employed, semiliterate divorced dad of two kids. My money's on Todd treating her like shit as soon as he starts earning his own income again.

God how depressing.

But Todd Will Prevail.

Todd's most recent Facebook post has been hanging there the past few weeks: "sick of it all"

I don't know if he ever managed to sell his "slay" bed.

My source on Todd comes from a mutual Facebook "friend" who knows someone in the local car dealership scene where Todd works, so I'm not 100% in the accuracy but I believe the gist is there.

Thanks for all the info Todd watcher

My future wife out here probably thinking no ones gonna love her awwwwwww I'm coming my little munchkin, don't lose hope

Please let Todd know that he will prevail. He’s too sensitive for this world, but he’ll survive.

Oh goody, Todd's spirit is rising again! Stay strong Todd man!

I suspect that many of his other few hundred followers are in it for the lols too. My personal favourites, from this thread, are Todd de-friending his dad while living with him, and Todd posting a picture of himself unsmiling in sunglasses, on a white horse. Amazing. Never change Todd.

Honestly, R283, that sounds far more like a threat on behalf of Todd than a promise. Also I think it's clear that he goes for women he sees as vulnerable or young enough to be easily impressed. Why is he imagining his future wife thinks no-one will love her? because what he's picturing is a young woman with very low self-esteem. Creepy creepy Todd.

I was just thinking about Todd this week. Hope he’s prevailing.

[quote] Does anyone still care about me?

Every time I pass a car dealership, I think of Todd.

And then I laugh.

I hope Todd isn’t selling Amway products by now.

I've been laughing my ass off at this old thread, so thanks to whoever pasted a link to it from the Let's Be Vaguebook post. Wherefore art thou, Todd? I need me more Todd!

Todd is the Everyman of our Times! Just your everyday schmuck living with his dad and perpetually down on his luck.

[quote] Is it me or does everything electronic like cable Xfinity your cell phone just to anything that has to do with technology since this all started seem to be completely freaking broken I'm over it damn

[quote] Is it me or does everything electronic like cable Xfinity your cell phone just to anything that has to do with technology since this all started seem to be completely freaking broken I'm over it damn