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You all misunderstand borderline personality.

Believe it or not, people with this affliction, at their very core, are the inverse of the narcissist. People with BPD start out 'too sensitive', too empathetic. People with borderline personality disorder empathize to the point of pain.

When the highly sensitive person grows up in a very non-validating and/or abusive environment, with a history of trauma, BPD can manifest.

In order for borderline personality to develop, an invalidating environment with and a highly sensitive person MUST BE present.

What is going on in a Borderline Personality Disorder sufferer's mind and how they are acting can be two entirely different things.

To the sufferer, BPD is about deep feelings, feelings often too difficult to express, feelings that are something along the lines of this : tIf others really get to know me, they will find me rejectable and will not be able to love me; and they will leave me;

tI need to have complete control of my feelings otherwise things go completely wrong;

tI have to adapt my needs to other people's wishes, otherwise they will leave me or attack me;

tI am an evil person and I need to be punished for it;

tOther people are evil and abuse you;

tIf someone fails to keep a promise, that person can no longer be trusted;

tIf I trust someone, I run a great risk of getting hurt or disappointed;

tIf you comply with someone's request, you run the risk of losing yourself;

tIf you refuse someone's request, you run the risk of losing that person;

tI will always be alone;

tI can't manage by myself, I need someone I can fall back on;

tThere is no one who really cares about me, who will be available to help me, and whom I can fall back on;

tI don't really know what I want;

tI will never get what I want;

tI'm powerless and vulnerable and I can't protect myself;.

tI have no control of myself;

tI can't discipline myself;

tMy feelings and opinions are unfounded;

tOther people are not willing or helpful.

To the family members, BPD behavior is often very frustrating can feel unfair and punitive - something like this: t You have been viewed as overly good and then overly bad;

tYou have been the focus of unprovoked anger or hurtful actions, alternating with periods when the family member acts perfectly normal and very loving;

tThings that you have said or done have been twisted and used against you;

tYou are accused of things you never did or said?

tYou often find yourself defending and justifying your intentions;

tYou find yourself concealing what you think or feel because you are not heard;

tYou feel manipulated, controlled, and sometimes lied to.

by Anonymousreply 47109/02/2016

Can anyone see this video? I get the message that my country has blocked this video. I live in the USA.

by Anonymousreply 108/05/2011

So in other words, BPD is all about me, me, me.

by Anonymousreply 208/05/2011

they're NUTS

by Anonymousreply 308/05/2011

Those statements all sound pretty true to me, R1.

by Anonymousreply 408/05/2011

Yes, while it's true both are consumed with self, narcissists cannot/will not empathize. People with BPD CAN and DO empathize...too much, sometimes. That's a HUGE difference. Even though people with BPD sometimes act evil, they are not evil. More than likely, they're beautiful people on the inside. Most have giant hearts and can't stand to see things suffer; however, they are almost impossible to live with because their emotions are so intense and out of control that they can somtimes become blind to the suffering they're inflicting on loved ones.. Although, unlike narcissists, I think people with BPD, with enough distance, can understand the effect they're having on others. Princess Di had BPD.

by Anonymousreply 508/05/2011

Back when I took Psych, BPD wasn't on the list. They added it when business fell off.

by Anonymousreply 608/05/2011

I still don't get why it is called "borderline personality"%0D %0D I understand the characteristics. I just don't get why it was given that particular name.

by Anonymousreply 708/05/2011

R7, perhaps it has something to do with the person seeming to change their personality to go along with others? As if they don't really have their own personality, but just mimic/reflect what they think others want to see?

by Anonymousreply 808/05/2011

Finally, someone on DL who really does understand BPD! Thank you, OP. Reading that description (of my feelings and behaviours) is both empowering and very very sad.

by Anonymousreply 908/05/2011

Oh for fuck's sake. So you've been diagnosed with BPD, OP, and because it's almost impossible to deal with, your therapist has told you how "many" BPs are "beautiful people on the inside." And "feel toooooo much." And "empathize tooooooo much." Well, your therapist is throwing out the attributes of about the 1% of contained and high functioning BPs with the hope that you will keep your anxiety contained and not become a Glenn Close on her when she has to reschedule an important. So, keep feeling special and too sensitive and pay no mind when most people give you a wide berth. Whatever gets you through the day.

by Anonymousreply 1008/05/2011

[quote]Believe it or not, people with this affliction, at their very core, are the inverse of the narcissist. Bullshit. A former BPD friend was a complete narcissist. Sure, there's some empathy there, but like R2 said "BPD is all about me, me, me" and that's how my former BPD friend was. I understand BPD all too well, thank you very much.

by Anonymousreply 1108/05/2011

That hit home, OP.

by Anonymousreply 1208/05/2011

R7 It's borderline 'personality disorder' like real-close-to-being personality disorder. The latter you do NOT want to catch.

by Anonymousreply 1308/05/2011

"Even though people with BPD sometimes act evil, they are not evil. More than likely, they're beautiful people on the inside. Most have giant hearts and can't stand to see things suffer; "%0D %0D Oh bosh! Lots of people with BPD spend their entire lives causing suffering in others, and are indifferent to the pain they cause. All they really care about are their own fears and feelings, they are as incapable of putting another person first as a narcissist.%0D %0D And who the hell keeps saying that Princess Di had BPD? Proof, please.

by Anonymousreply 1408/05/2011

[quote]There is no one who really cares about me, who will be available to help me, and whom I can fall back on;%0D %0D This one resonates, but almost nothing else in that list does.%0D %0D I guess that means I'm not BPD... I'm just pathetic.%0D

by Anonymousreply 1508/05/2011

They sound like typical sociopaths.

by Anonymousreply 1608/05/2011

R10/11 = NPD

by Anonymousreply 1708/05/2011

Uh, we really don't care. We have our own lives, which you care nothing about. Get back to the borderline.

by Anonymousreply 1808/05/2011

You know what's funny? The over-the-top ANGRY people who respond to threads like these. It's so obvious that these people have the worst cases ever.

by Anonymousreply 1908/05/2011

I was the one posting on the narcissist thrad saying that I thought my ex has BPD, not narcissism. This thread has confirmed it, and I have sympathy for those with BOD, but it doesn't make the headfuckery any easier. Ultimately they need to grow up and get therapy. There have been some good examples recently of therapy being useful for borderline personality disorder.

by Anonymousreply 2008/05/2011

So, OP, clearly the answer is: expose BPD sufferers on the side of a hill to die soon after birth.

Or, if they somehow made it to adolescence or beyond: shun them entirely.

by Anonymousreply 2108/05/2011

One of the best depictions I have ever seen of BPD was the character Christina Ricci plays in PROZAC NATION. The movie went straight to video because the central character is so monstrous to the people around her that its almost intolerable to sit all the way through it: however, her behavior is very much like a person who has BPD. But this "they may be beautiful on the outside and so shouldn't be blamed for acting in a way that is perceived as evil" argument really bothers me. The argument that "they can't help it" would then have to extend to sociopaths then too: once could always say they can't help being sociopaths, after all. I agree that BPD sufferers often are tremendously hurt by what they do to other people and feel they can't help it, but if they're manipulating, and lying to, people (or behaving cruelly to them), then they absolutely have to take the consequences, just as a sociopath would.

by Anonymousreply 2308/05/2011

[quote]I still don't get why it is called "borderline personality"

It got this moniker when it was thought it might be something on the fringes of schizophrenia, on the borderline between neurosis (emotional distress) and psychosis (break with reality, hallucination, delusion).

by Anonymousreply 2408/06/2011

A good book for insight into the first person experience of this disorder at link.

by Anonymousreply 2508/06/2011

If you think the fibromyalgia support boards have some astounding true tales, ("I'm so lucky, my husband knows he can have no physical contact with me whatsoever, and that sometimes even glancing at me from across the living room causes my skin tremendous pain"), you should see the ones for BPDs. ("I'm just so grateful that my husband loves me in spite of my episodes of screaming and throwing things and having the police come to throw him out of the house. He understands that these episodes need to be ridden out and that soon we will have three minutes of calm. I can sometimes sense his getting cross with me and he knows he really can't do that or I may perceive him as the source of all evil. He knows he has to check that or it will make me punch him. Overall, he has accommodated my disability and I have a great life.")

by Anonymousreply 2608/06/2011

[quote]I have to adapt my needs to other people's wishes, otherwise they will leave me or attack me;

I've never thought of BPDs as being particularly concerned about the wishes of other people. Quite the contrary.

by Anonymousreply 2708/06/2011

BPDs are concerned with other people's feelings, in a way. They can't really mindfuck with you until they've won your trust, and they win the trust by appearing to be whatever you want a friend or lover to be. %0D %0D They read your feelings, although it's only to further their own ends.

by Anonymousreply 2808/06/2011

My BPD friend was, in some ways, one of the best friends I'd ever had. No one was as kind or supportive. She was that person I could count on for sympathy or advice or a kick in the butt as needed. And the funniest person I'd ever met; she could call me at work and within sixty seconds have me literally out of my chair and on the floor, gasping for air from laughing so hard.

But then I'd do something that set her off, usually inadvertently, and I'd get a three-page letter telling me I'm the worst person in the world and she never wanted to speak to me again. And later, after a period of months or years, she'd call me up and pick up where we left off, like nothing ever happened. It wasn't just me; I remember her spending weeks ranting about a niece like she was Hitler and Jeffrey Dahmer rolled into one, and then one day she said her niece was the person in her family she loved the most. Reminding her of her Hitler and Jeffrey Dahmer comments returned the most sincere quizzical look, as if she was hearing that opinion for the very first time.

After our last reconciliation, I told her that I couldn't go through another cycle because it hurt too much, and the next goodbye would be forever. And when it happened, I stuck to my guns.

Fast forward ten years. I'm chatting with a co-worker who mentions she used to work where my ex-friend worked. The co-worker knew her and I mentioned we used to be close but had a falling out, and I sometimes thought about calling her up. The co-worker looked at the floor, and then to me and said softly, "You know she died, right?"

Ugh. But at least I can hop on DL and say with authority, "I had a friend with BPD, and she died."

by Anonymousreply 2908/06/2011

Can someone explain what the difference is between someone who is BPD and someone who has abandonment issues? My bf has a lot of the symptoms in OP's post, but I think his main issues revolve around past abandonmnets.

by Anonymousreply 3008/06/2011

r30, that's like saying, "Can someone explain to me the difference between someone who has lung cancer and someone who has a persistent cough?"

by Anonymousreply 3108/06/2011

The clumsiness and imprecision of the diagnostic umbrella - not helped necessarily by the fracturing of the thing along a variety of pseudo-objective categories - reflect the continued lack of understanding of etiology.

We continue to diagnose psychiatric disorders by symptoms rather than by underlying cause(s). Physical medicine is in many cases farther long - at least we don't say people died of the flux; we say they died of an e coli infection.

Granted that psychiatric disorders are not all going to be found to issue from genetic or environmental proclivities, and the actions of social environment always will affect outcomes just as much as they do for physical disorders. But until the roots are better identified, we're going to be left with the same kind of symptom-driven, falsely objectified claptrap that produced the borderline personality disorder fiascos (as I see the results) and those for other personality disorders.

Don't yammer at me about treatment successes. Sitting down with anyone open to it and talking and working through things using REBT or other behavior-modification, reflective-based therapies will work - for those for whom they're going to work.

And as far as the DSM refinements "based on current research," I've been through the last two and it's like watching sausage being made by vegans with a hankering for steak. I KNOW members of the BPD committee were diagnosable in the area themselves - how does that give me confidence in their twaddle?

by Anonymousreply 3208/06/2011

Psychobabble psychobabble psychobabble psychobabble psychobabble psychobabble

by Anonymousreply 3308/06/2011

OP, thank you.%0D %0D R29 - sorry about your friend.

by Anonymousreply 3408/06/2011

Grew up with one--she destroyed my family. Work with them--they're poisonous and fuck up the psych units with their manipulative and splitting behaviors. Whatever lets you sleep better at night, OP, but keep the fuck out of my hospital.

by Anonymousreply 3508/06/2011

Some of those sentences posted by OP are so universal, so broad, they according to that list, we would ALL be walking around with it. We all have feelings and thoughts like those at some time or other. I agree with the poster upthread that it's a new "diagnosis" designed to cover a wide area when a more specific diagnosis isn't applicable.

by Anonymousreply 3608/06/2011

[quote]The co-worker looked at the floor, and then to me and said softly, "You know she died, right?"

C'mon, finish the story. How did she die?

by Anonymousreply 3708/06/2011

[quote]. But at least I can hop on DL and say with authority, "I had a friend with BPD, and she died."

You just made my day, r29.

by Anonymousreply 3808/06/2011

This crap is like horoscopes. You can always 'make' it fit.

by Anonymousreply 3908/06/2011

OP? Can you tell me why I should give a fuck? My solution: stay away from nutcases with personality disorders. They're not happy until they take you down with them.

by Anonymousreply 4008/06/2011

I honestly don't know how she died, R37. We had our last conversation in December 2000, and she died in 2005. I didn't find out until 2009. My co-worker only knew that she had been in and out of the hospital for a number of months before she died. I've fallen out of touch with any mutual friends, and I didn't feel right calling her family four years later and asking for the gory details.

She was very obese and had a litany of health problems, so it's not a shock that she died so young. But it's especially sad knowing that she had an odd fixation on retirement -- obsessed with getting vested for pensions and the 401(k) and when she could start drawing Social Security, because if she could just hang in there for 25 more years, then no more going to work and life would start getting good. I always used to tell her that it wouldn't be so horrible to try to be happy today as well. I should write fortune cookies, huh?

Sorry if I'm being bloggy.

by Anonymousreply 4108/06/2011

nah... I think I got it down pat...

by Anonymousreply 4208/06/2011

One time, I blamed this guy for taking me to an Indian restaurant for dinner where I got food poisoning. I puked for two days straight and lived off of popsicles for another week because my stomach was still so fucked up. I had it in my head that he did something to my food while I was in the bathroom. And later I felt bad about blaming him for a kitchen problem. But then it turned out he was a total psycho and probably did intentionally poison my food, he did much worse things to me and others. Does this make me borderline or him a psychopath?

by Anonymousreply 4308/06/2011

are boderlines cared all the time

by Anonymousreply 4408/07/2011

I don't know if this was answered (or correctly as I read some very incorrect statements): BPD is named such because originally ( back in the first half of the 20th century ) because suffers' perception of reality was so queued, so twisted that they were on the borderline of a psychotic break from reality.

Looking at any borderline and you can clearly see how that relates. The entire push/pull they go to avoid abandonment depression - which is what drives them to cling with a vice grip to someone then succumb to the fear that they person will leave/reject them inevitably so they do it first to protect themselves and on and on. THAT is the key. Not empathy. They neither have real empathy or would know what to make of it of they did. They perseverate on being abandoned. The fear consumes them and that is all the care about.

Borderline's are the most difficult to treat and are dreaded because they manipulative - but in a different way than the anti-social or the narcissist.

THE classic example is Glen Close in Fatal Attraction. Oh yeah - it is predominant in females as anti-social is in males.

The only thing worse to treat or have to deal with than a female borderline is a male borderline.

by Anonymousreply 4511/01/2011

Therefore, gays are narcissists and not borderlines.

by Anonymousreply 4611/01/2011

One of the most intriguing people I've ever met was diagnosed as borderline. His capability for excessive empathy was definitely supported by his codependent relationships with women (he was straight). He also bullied his way to the top of a large corporation, making himself obscenely rich. He seemed to be constantly struggling with his desires to be treating people really well and then randomly feeling the need to treat them like total shit. Still not sure if he had a conscience..

by Anonymousreply 4711/01/2011

R47, so was he in genuine emotional turmoil, or just occasionally an evil asshole?

by Anonymousreply 4811/01/2011

No, borderlines don't respect boundaries. That's where the name came from. Duh. It had nothing to do with "excessive empathy." Empathetic people may not always respect boundaries, but they at least know them. Borderlines don't see why you have any boundaries, because they think they don't. In fact, they do, which is "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me."

by Anonymousreply 4911/01/2011

I know a woman who is BPD and bipolar, and when she's NOT on meds she's a total mess with binge drinking, blaming her own kids for her own problems and issues, and it's a shame.

Thankfully she's gone on meds and getting help.

by Anonymousreply 5011/01/2011

But borderlines are not expressing real empathy...it's a manipulation. They need constant validation and they will do anything to get it. They can fake empathy incredibly well. They can seem incredibly concerned about you...it's part of a snare. Once they've ensnared you, they want you to only think about them...their needs, their desires.

OP's therapist/support person is an enabler. This business about "being an incredibly beautiful person on the inside, but one who does bad things" is typical of therapists who aren't qualified to work with a serious illness like borderline. They are easily manipulated by their client, who can feign caring, tenderness, and empathy to a degree that the therapist cannot objectively judge the manipulation. Borderlines really need to work with professionals who understand the illness really well. Otherwise they'll inadvertently harm the client by spewing the kind of nonsense that OP has been spoon fed. It's critical that therapists not enable their clients. But therapists don't always understand the disease, and others have a hard time dealing with their client's meltdowns so they frame everything in a flattering way.

OP's whole post is a classic manipulation. "I am a tender, sensitive person who has been cruelly misrepresented. I don't mean to do the evil things I do, I'm just so lost, lonely, and frightened. Things have been hard on me, and I can't help myself." Borderlines rarely hold themselves truly accountable for the harm they cause others; they're too busy feeling sorry for themselves.

And though not technically "narcissistic disorder", it's just as serious a pathology. Some believe it's actually worse. Narcissists only see themselves, they are at the center of everything within their perspective. They often lack the guileful ability of borderlines to manipulate, something which makes the borderline person far more dangerous. Narcissists tend to inadvertently expose their disorder; borderlines can deceive a prospective target with much greater finesse.

People who are "beautiful on the inside" don't commit "evil acts." That's an enabler's perspective being reflected through the borderlines manipulation. Deep within borderlines is a sociopathic potential. Because they see themselves as always being the 'victims', they are able to rationalize and engage in some pretty heinous behavior. They can be very dangerous. Frankly, you're better off with a narcissist (and that's really saying something!).

by Anonymousreply 5111/01/2011

49 is correct...borderlines don't respect boundaries.

by Anonymousreply 5211/01/2011

It is true they do not respect nor even recognize boundaries but that isn't why this disorder is term'd Borderline. #51 is spot on and I touched up that in my post. They lack a sense of self and therefore they attempt to satisfy their needs etc externally. When they are said to be primitive - it is akin to the toddler testing independence by slowly playing farther and father away from Mom Or dad and then running back and clinging to them. In a toddler it's a natural process. The borderline does that - or rather it is similar - as an adult.

I really do my utmost to not have to treat someone with BPD. I swore and oath and I would not turn my back on someone in an emergency but my style just doesn't work well it.

Generally, however, a major barrier for those with characterological disorders is that personality generally begins to solidly in adolescence so it becomes entrenched and with each passing year more difficult to treat and effect a positive outcome.

by Anonymousreply 5311/01/2011

From Wikipedia:

"Borderline personality disorder is a diagnosis about which many articles and books have been written, yet about which little is known based on empirical research."

That's a big red flag.

The DSM is five or more of the following 9:

"Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment."

"A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.

"Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.

"Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging

"Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, threats or self-injuring behavior

"Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood

"Chronic feelings of emptiness

"Inappropriate anger or difficulty controlling anger

"Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation, delusions or severe dissociative symptoms"

The one about fighting is the one people care about.

The WHO does not recognize this "disease." It has a different definition more narrowly focused on negative aspects.

Three of five of: "marked tendency to act unexpectedly and without consideration of the consequences;

"marked tendency to quarrelsome behaviour and to conflicts with others, especially when impulsive acts are thwarted or criticized;

"liability to outbursts of anger or violence, with inability to control the resulting behavioural explosions;

"difficulty in maintaining any course of action that offers no immediate reward;

"unstable and capricious mood."

The WHO's definitions would not fit OP's scenario, I don't think.

by Anonymousreply 5411/01/2011

Wikipedia says the opposite, that it grows less over time and some recover, R55.

by Anonymousreply 5511/01/2011

That is the "Impulsive Disorder" of WHO.

Their "borderline disorder is

Two of the following in addition to the above

"disturbances in and uncertainty about self-image, aims, and internal preferences (including sexual);

"liability to become involved in intense and unstable relationships, often leading to emotional crisis;

"excessive efforts to avoid abandonment;

"recurrent threats or acts of self-harm;

"chronic feelings of emptiness."

by Anonymousreply 5611/01/2011

What is the best treatment for a BPS? Therapy + meds?

by Anonymousreply 5711/01/2011

R57, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy is the best treatment.

by Anonymousreply 5811/01/2011

What's the best revenge on a BPD person?

by Anonymousreply 5911/01/2011

R55...Wiki is hardly the authority on such things.

My experience is that borderlines get worse as they get older, not better. Their commitment to their illness, rather than to recovery, gets stronger and stronger. To do otherwise would potentially force them to actually see the damage they've caused to other people, rather than to view those episodes as having been evidence that they were somehow the victim.

Some illnesses do get...softer, as the person gets older. Borderline is not one of them. Generally speaking, a borderline diagnosis is a bit of a sealed fate. That's why medical professionals are often reluctant to go there first. Most borderlines have had multiple diagnoses before they are actually properly diagnosed as borderline. By that time, the damage done to the person by their illness (and behavior) is somewhat irreversible.

It's always best with these things to get the person into treatment while the brain is still developing. Ideally, that would be before the person is 25 or so. Once the brain has finished that stage of early development, it's extremely difficult to treat them. The pathology makes it virtually impossible, because borderlines assume a 'victim' stance that precludes a lot of self-discovery. And by that time they've learned habits (such as the faked empathy and guileful manipulation) that become difficult to treat.

by Anonymousreply 6011/01/2011

R58 is absolutely correct.

The sad reality, however, is that DBT is the only treatment that has ever shown any success with borderlines, and yet it is only considered moderately effective in many cases. In most cases, even DBT cannot effectively affect a significant change in borderlines. And the practitioner has to be incredibly skilled at this method; a lesser practitioner will completely enable the client's illness, creating more harm than good.

I personally think it's a better treatment for sexual abuse and trauma survivors, than for borderlines. It's too tricky with borderlines. They are seeking validation, and one of the methods of DBT is to provide validation. I've seen this go horribly awry, particularly when practitioners do not understand the manipulations and deceptions inherent in the illness. I've seen people suffer terrible setbacks because their therapist/ support person validated dysfunctional behavior, inappropriate actions, and/or dysfunctional thinking, because they were either inappropriately implementing DBT in a way that did not understand what they were dealing with.

by Anonymousreply 6111/01/2011

Are people who do the "I'm so worried about you" thing where they contact you because they say they fear for your health/safety or whatever and then proceed to make demands where you have to help THEM considered Borderline?

by Anonymousreply 6211/01/2011

No, probably just selfish.

So, no one can answer me at R59?

by Anonymousreply 6311/01/2011

R63...you want an answer on how best to get revenge on a person who's severely mentally ill? Seriously?

The best "revenge" is not to pander and enable them. Walk away from the person. Live a happy, functional, and fulfilling life.

by Anonymousreply 6411/01/2011

A word of caution: mental illness exists on a spectrum. Highly functioning borderlines stand more of a chance of seeking help and controlling it. R60, your experience may be with people who didn't receive BPD and/or have more severe forms.

by Anonymousreply 6511/01/2011

"Even though people with BPD sometimes act evil, they are not evil. "

I reject this distinction. If your actions are good, there's no point in somebody's saying that "although you usually act virtuously, you're not good."

Am I jus thickly practical, or is this allegation of inner goodness--despite outward acts of evil--precisely what is fucked up with therapy?

If you do good, I don't care if you secretly seethe with hatred. Because I'm unlikely to ever know, but also because you might take on the qualities of your own actions. Do good, become good.

Tired of people apologizing for bad deeds with, "But that's not me; not who I really am."

by Anonymousreply 6611/02/2011

Whut Ev, OP

by Anonymousreply 6711/02/2011

The reasons behind it don't change the effect. BPD's are still impossible to deal with.

by Anonymousreply 6811/02/2011

Best revenge on a BPD person is to abandon them, full stop. It's what they're most afraid of and it fuels why they behave the way they do.

I grew up with a classically Borderline mother and it was hell. I was trapped - she could put on a perfectly reasonable, seemingly sane face to the public but behind closed doors, all she wanted to do was rage about something and usually at me (my younger brother was the perfect child, I was the monster. Oddly, he was the one with friends who did drugs and all I did was have weird drama friends, who obviously must have been a bad influence on me so I never heard the end of it about how I needed better friends.)

I got lucky - I escaped, and menopause and grandmotherhood seems to have mellowed out my mother. I still see it lurking behind her eyes, but she's learned to keep the rages under control (or at least out of my eyesight.)

And the cost is that her first-born son moved halfway across the country and sees her a couple times a year. All she ever wanted was a stable family, and she fucked herself out of it because of her selfishness and the rage inside.

I deleted my Facebook after she joined because I could tell we were going down that road again. No huge loss - but it should say something that not using Facebook at all is easier than dealing with my Mother's reaction to whatever is on Facebook. And I'm 36, but it's energy I don't need in my life. I've worked too long to move away from it.

I've spent enough time in therapy to know that I'm not borderline myself, but you can tell the ways in which I was raised by a borderline. I tend to be overly nice and accommodating to people, but when I hit a breaking point I have a hard time arguing rationally, because with Mom rational arguments meant nothing and the only way the fight would end was with one of us completely breaking down, so I had to learn to say the most awful, cruel, straight-to-the-gut insulting things just so Mom would cry and the fight would be over. Things about how I was glad she'd die young because she was so obese and her heart would give out (spoken calmly while looking her dead in the eye, screaming it would have lost the impact) so it means that I have an exceptionally cruel streak that can come out in very stressful situations.

I could go on for days, but a post asking for sympathy for borderlines while they deliberately make other people's lives hell is classic.

Sending good positive thoughts to anyone else trapped with a BPD in their life. It's a horrible, confusing thing to have to contend with.

by Anonymousreply 6911/02/2011

So this is what it has come to: lack of "validation" = abuse? Why would ANYONE want to be a parent in today's world? Talk about thankless and impossible . . .

by Anonymousreply 7011/02/2011

I've been friends for 18 years with a woman who was recently (finally!) diagnosed with BPD. She's been going to DBT for around 2 years. It's only made things worse. From the time I've known her she's been at turns: charming, funny, odd, rude, smart (very), histrionic, narcissistic, manipulative, angry - very, very angry, lonely, lost, promiscuous, withdrawn, demanding, untruthful, malicious, and very dramatic.

She's gone through 12 - 15 therapists. The next to the last one finally referred her to DBT after 5 sessions of my friend sobbing on the sofa for the entire 50 minutes. She's on anti-depressants, anti-anxiety medication and has a prescription for Xanax.

She's blamed her mother - who didn't love her enough and was sometimes got very angry. - her younger brother for being born and taking away her father's attention. - her aunt for coming between she and her very special very favorite grandmother. - her older sister for not paying enough attention to her when she was young. - her first boyfriend for getting her pregnant and abandoning her after she broke up with him and didn't tell him until she was 8 months along and he had moved on and married someone else. - her parents for initially disapproving of her pregancy (after she told them 2 weeks before the baby came - surprise!) and even though they later apologized and adore her daughter. - her ex-boyfriends wife for stealing him away - her bosses - who expect her to do her job like an adult. - her students (she's a teacher) who don't respect her in the way that she so richly deserves - most of her friends who don't pay enough attention to her problems and aren't sympathetic enough - strangers on the street who ask her "How are you?" and don't [italic]really[/italic] mean it. - religion (it stole her soul) - politicians (they don't really mean it either) - the internet (nobody really means anything) - her fellow group therapy patients (they're all soooo self centered) - every man that she's every had a crush on, cared about, thought about, dreamt about, who didn't respond the way she "needed him" to.

She's pretended many, many times to deeply care about someone (even a student who later committed suicide) and some how made it completely about her.

She's never had a genuinely kind thought about anyone else's feelings in the entire 18 years I've known her.

She's was getting a little better after 1 1/2 years of DBT. Recently she spent almost an entire weekend sobbing and screaming at me on the phone because she got called on the carpet for not taking attendance in class. ("It's too much to ask along with all the other stuff I've got to do")

Her therapist wouldn't answer her pages. He later apologized and validated all her hyper dramatic emotional response to a minor situation.

Everything is all about her - always. She's the victim. Nobody has every loved her enough and never will. I feel very sad for her.

I've walked away. Stopped taking her phone calls, stopped going to lunch (where I always had to pay) and feel like I'm free again.

by Anonymousreply 7111/02/2011

I had a friend with BPD. We met in high school and I was her friend until she was in her mid-twenties. From what I have read about BPD, it tends to rear its ugly head starting in the late teens to early twenties, but the seeds of it are planted in early childhood, usually from family-inflicted trauma.

My friend had been molested and raped when she was a young child, mostly by her oldest brother though possibly by her father as well. She blocked out those traumatic memories and only began to uncover them after years of meds and therapy. It is sad to think of what a marvelous person she'd have become if not for the abuse and instability in her childhood.

She had always been articulate, dramatic, emotional, witty and caring since I'd met her, but as time passed it seemed that her personality was being eroded and consumed by the disorder. The wit and charm and listening skills and logic all fell by the wayside and what was left was a quivering mass of untethered emotions. It became exhausting to be around her because of all the drama! drama! drama! and her relationships to people always seemed to be 100% LOVE or 100% HATE.

She became obsessed with some loser guy who treated her like crap and for the last half-decade that I knew her, it seemed her every thought and desire revolved around him. I never met him but by her description he seems equally dysfunctional, so I dearly hope they never have children. The good news is that, because of the mood stabilizing meds she takes, the doctors made her have an IUD implanted that'll keep her from getting pregnant for ten years.

As to people with BPD mellowing out or getting better over time, what I've read is that they're at their highest risk for suicide/suicide attempts in their mid-to-late twenties and that after that they seem to naturally stabilize enough so that they're no longer suicidal. Since BPD is mostly diagnosed in women, I wonder if the severity of the BPD is related to hormone fluctuation / fertility level.

Either way, I have been told that people with BPD are never really cured and that the most you could expect is for them to stabilize enough to be functional in society; hold down a job etc. That unless you're directly related to someone with BPD, it's in your own best interest not to get involved with one on any meaningful level because it's stressful and emotionally exhausting at best.

I've only known the one person with BPD, but she did have a conscience and, underneath all the crazy, she had a good heart. She was a good friend for more than a decade and I hope she finds peace and fulfillment in life. Perhaps in a decade or two modern medicine will offer better treatment for her disorder.

by Anonymousreply 7211/02/2011

"My friend had been molested and raped when she was a young child, mostly by her oldest brother though possibly by her father as well. She blocked out those traumatic memories and only began to uncover them after years of meds and therapy."

There are still people who believe this nonsense?

by Anonymousreply 7311/02/2011

Gurl, I dont care what causes the disorder, all I know is it takes a damn fool codependednt to deal with one. Face if, if someone says "I borderline", run as fast as you can. Otherwise, you'll be on here posting next week how your borderline friend stole your credit card and boyfriend cause he was cycling that day.

by Anonymousreply 7411/02/2011

R72...your friend was lying. It's what borderlines do. You were manipulated. Your own post is baffling...you say she had a "conscience", yet all the behavior you describe suggests otherwise. You say she was a "good friend", but "exhausting" to be around; that she HATED or LOVED people, and that she was "drama, drama, drama!." That's all contradictory. My guess is that she was your "friend" because you were fairly easy to manipulate, and you (in some way) enabled her. Borderlines tend to LOVE people who enable them, and HATE people who call them on their shit.

The "recovered memory" business is typical of borderlines. They create abuse scenarios to help rationalize their cruel, aggressive, and harmful behavior. The scenario is meant to elicit sympathy and to make the other person more malleable.

The fact that you are terrified that your friend might choose to have children says a lot about her. You are no longer friends with her, and I'm assuming it's because it all became too much for you. I understand that you want to believe she was a 'good person deep down inside', but it's not a question of that. She has a serious mental illness, one that creates a situation where behavior is always a means to an end.

by Anonymousreply 7511/02/2011

R65...generally I'd agree that there is a "spectrum." But illnesses such as borderline do not have a huge variation in manifestation. There are folks who can function at a "higher level" in terms of working, perhaps. But I never use "working" as a criteria of 'better' or 'worse' mental health. There are mentally ill who can't work who are highly functioning in other areas, and vice versa. Borderline is fairly consistent in its impact upon the individual and on those in that individual's social environment. A "lessor" form of borderline might well be another illness...it might be a manifestation of trauma, for example. Borderline itself is fairly predictable and consistent.

It's also important, I think, to point out that personality disorders are often not a result of abuse. That's a misnomer. PTSD can be triggered by abuse. But personality disorders often manifest in people who are raised in families where the parents have personality disorders. It often seems to get perpetuated within families through a replication of behavior/perspective from parent to child. This may be partly caused by a genetic predisposition; scientific research has shown a chromosome issue with BPD's, and there is a high rate of BPD among twins. Nothing has been proven; it's all correlation, not causation. It is interesting, however, to see the high degree of correlation in these areas among people with BPD. This would clearly be exacerbated by behavioral issues within the family, particularly ones that are parent-to-child.

by Anonymousreply 7611/02/2011

Interesting post R76.

Do we know how borderline personality disorder correlates with employment? I wonder of there is a "best career choice" for them. Based on what I am reading here it seems some would excel at sales.

A psychologist friend once told me that even non-indulging children of alcoholics enter adulthood with alcoholic behavior because it's their norm, the only adult behavior they know well.

by Anonymousreply 7711/02/2011

Theoretically, people with borderline can work. The problem is that borderlines have difficulty interacting with others, and that can create a myriad of problems. They tend to go from job to job, on a fairly frequent basis.

The other alarming fact is that they tend to be drawn to helping professions. This raises a whole host of other issues, particularly since their motivation for wanting to be in those professions is usually dysfunctional. It's a part of the illness...wanting to manipulate vulnerable people by trying to create a false persona...faking empathy as a manipulative snare...trying to elicit validation that they are "good people" while simultaneously carrying a hidden agenda. It's a disconcerting aspect of the illness.

I have heard of instances where someone who was diagnosed as borderline became successful in the work field, but it's all anecdotal. I've never actually seen that myself.

by Anonymousreply 7811/02/2011

[quote]Based on what I am reading here it seems some would excel at sales.

I think that would be the worst - they can't deal with rejection. In sales you deal with a lot of rejection. I doubt they would last long in sales, it would be too much for them to deal with.

Lots of informative information on this thread.

OP, I do have compassion for people who suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder. Because I don't think they can help themselves. I would be supportive if they were therapy bound though. However, even if they were, I would always have to keep a safe distance, and just be causal friends or acquaintances having to accept the fact that at anytime the casual friendship will completely cease, with no rational explanation. Basically never expect anything from them - not even common courtesy, consideration, or a real heart to heart exchange. It will never happen.

I could never get involved with someone who has this. Ever. There is no sense of fairness in a romantic relationship or good friendship with one. You are constantly walking on eggshells having to censor or carefully word everything so the BPDer would not feel a sense of abandonment or rejection - there will come a time where you will slip, which will just cause the BPDer to turn on you and suddenly make you his or her subject of hatred, drama and turmoil. It's too much work with nothing good that will come out of it. Not to mention all of the turmoil and drama involved. The cycle of hurting people. It is not a two way relationship - only one way - their way, a way that always changes when the wind blows. You can't even predict their behavior, thoughts or feelings, it changes so much.

A borderline has nothing to give, and will only take. They will put you on a pedastal one day and suddenly turn on you the next day due to factors that are completely out of your control.

It's just not equal footing, and so not worth the hurt and turmoil involved.

They also have no real sense of identity. They will obsess over one thing one day, and lose interest the next. They take on the interests and hobbies of the people they are "interested in" at the moment - and lose interest in those activities as they lose interest in that person. Then on to the next obsession, and identity/hobby/interest shift. They are not true to themselves because they have no idea on even who they are - or what they want. If they don't know who they are or what they want - how are you supposed to know as a friend or romantic partner? You can't know. Basically you can't ever "know" them on a deep level. The "relationship" will always just be too surfacey with no potential to evolve and grow deeper.

Ideally, they talk of wanting to be normal, having a normal life, a stable life, but that will never happen. They are not capable of that.

It doesn't mean that they are not good people somewhere inside - I do believe that under all that confusion and instability, deep down there is probably a lot of good there - but their over sensitivity, irrational thought process, impulsivity, and selfish behavior over shadows all of it.

From what I have read real borderlines don't seek therapy, is this true? Or do therapists just avoid taking them on as clients due to how difficult they are to treat?

by Anonymousreply 7911/02/2011

R79...it depends upon the definition of "seeking therapy." Borderlines are often advised to apply for Social Security Disability, and that requires psychiatric assessment. In order to get other critical services (like health care) they may have to have a case worker.

Their interest in "therapy" is often only an interest in being unconditionally validated. If they do not receive that validation, they quickly move on to another practitioner. In some instances, a borderline will search, fairly exhaustively, for a practitioner whom they believe they can manipulate, and who will enable them in their illness. Even in these instances they will become extremely agitated, and even very confrontational, if they believe the practitioner is not 'on their side.' They will insist upon the practitioner's 'sympathy' and unconditional acceptance. This is obviously very damaging to the person in treatment; they often change the facts of circumstances to make themselves seem more sympathetic, and will even create elaborate abuse scenarios in order to elicit sympathy from the practitioner. If the practitioner is an enabler, this can have serious consequences, and the borderline's mental health can severely deteriorate...it's a catch-22. The borderline wants only positive feedback and complete, unequivocal validation. This is, in turn, damaging to them. Yet they will not tolerate any criticism they perceive to be 'negative', even if it's proffered with great care.

So, in a real sense, they are not looking for "therapy." They're looking to be enabled. This is why practitioners are often reluctant to work with borderlines...it's a situation that isn't amenable to real therapeutic growth, and it can ultimately actually cause greater harm to the person because their motivation is dysfunctional.

by Anonymousreply 8011/02/2011

[quote]Yet they will not tolerate any criticism they perceive to be 'negative', even if it's proffered with great care.

Yes, this is what I was referring to as always having to censor yourself/walking on eggshells when communicating with a borderline - and there will come a time when you slip and are not as careful. It's a lot of work, and doesn't seem worth it.

If they do receive criticism or perceived criticism, they are confrontational, correct? Or, is their way of confronting just dropping the therapist, or person who is confronting them with their behavior - as they are suddenly the "bad person" for saying something?

What I am trying to say is - a borderline WILL confront someone, verbally? Or do they use other methods - by just dropping someone or being avoidant of the issue/criticism at hand?

by Anonymousreply 8111/02/2011

And you have to watch everything you say *so* carefully because you know it can (and likely will) be used against you. Somehow. Some way.

by Anonymousreply 8211/02/2011

[quote] So, in a real sense, they are not looking for "therapy." They're looking to be enabled.

Sounds like they are looking for love but only as it exists in their unbaked definition of it.

by Anonymousreply 8311/02/2011

R81...borderlines will not eschew confrontation. To the contrary, they can be extremely confrontational.

The reason they drop the therapist differs from the one the borderline person would generally proffer. A borderline person will say, "this therapist doesn't get me. He doesn't understand that I'm the victim, and that I need support and self esteem. I need affirmation, not criticism. He's against me. He's not on my side." Etc.

What's really happening is that the borderline person's manipulations aren't working, and he's afraid that the therapist is 'on to' him. Borderlines won't tolerate that. They may fight, at first, and demand that the practitioner accept their false persona at face value, and deal with them in accordance with that false persona. Borderlines will sometime fight tooth and nail to get the unconditional validation that they demand. You'd be amazed at how often this is successful. Practitioners will sometimes 'back down' just from the sheer force of the borderlines indignant anger and their accusations. Ultimately, however, the borderline can only get so much compliance from practitioners, in terms of getting nothing but positive validation and unconditional acceptance. When that happens, the borderline person will start shopping around for a new practitioner, one whom they can start 'fresh' with.

In some instances, borderlines, after learning the details of BPD, will demand that their diagnosis be changed, or they will not work with the practitioner. They refuse to accept the diagnosis, and will aggressively argue that they do not fit the criteria. If the practitioner does not acquiesce, the borderline person will move on.

by Anonymousreply 8411/02/2011

R83...looking for love? No, not at all.

by Anonymousreply 8511/02/2011

R84, with all the different personality disorders discussed on DL, I have read on some, but get confused as many have common traits - but are entirely different disorders. Thank you for clarifying that BPD's were confrontational.

by Anonymousreply 8611/02/2011

Any famous Borderlines?

by Anonymousreply 8711/02/2011

I think the Office's Michael Scott is a perfect example of BPD. Because they have made it into a comedy, the impact of his abuse as manager is dampened. But just watch him in each episode and you will understand the dysfunction in full view.

by Anonymousreply 8811/02/2011

R60 - BDP is the military's favorite diagnosis for everything, particularly in cases where individuals either refuse to conform, or in cases of those who are whistleblowers, precisely because it is seen as a sealed fate, and certainly affects military careers that way.

by Anonymousreply 8911/02/2011

I am fairly certain that my sister, who recently died after years of struggling with mental illness and drug addiction, was either Borderline, Bipolar or both. Sometimes the two disorders can manifest themselves in similar ways. And I'm not referring to the bogus contemporary notion of Bipolar as a disorder that afflicts anyone who has ever had a mood swing in their life, but rather the severe, chaotic manic depressive disorder.

by Anonymousreply 9011/02/2011

R89...that's interesting and terribly depressing. I doubt that most practitioners would accept a military diagnosis of a mental illness. There's usually an agenda involved. Fascinating to learn that the military is even more evil than I had imagined.

by Anonymousreply 9111/02/2011

R90...you're exactly right. It's not uncommon for borderlines to be mistakenly diagnosed as having bipolar disorder. And I'm also referring to the actual illness, not the contemporary pop culture version; another astute observation on your part.

by Anonymousreply 9211/02/2011

The military was misdiagnosing people as having personality disorders before there was a better understanding of TBI and PTSD. It is only very recently that things have changed. It is also hard to diagnose those conditions because there is less continuity of care than in the civilian world, since service members change duty stations frequently. I have seen my friends' personalities change after war and nobody at their new unit will have any clue what they were like before combat. Unless your chain of command happened to put you in for a Purple Heart, nobody will know you have TBI.

by Anonymousreply 9311/02/2011

R93...thank you for that clarification.

by Anonymousreply 9411/02/2011

I've been told one of my mother's sisters was diagnosed with this. But everything I read about it seems even more descriptive of my mother and grandmother. Granted, my aunt has been medicated for quite some time now and went through some therapy, the other two have never had it looked into.

by Anonymousreply 9511/02/2011

In Girl Interrupted wasn't Winona's character diagnosed BPD? She didn't seem manipulative though.

by Anonymousreply 9611/02/2011

"In Girl Interrupted wasn't Winona's character diagnosed BPD?"

There was nothing really wrong with the Winona Ryder character in that film, although by the end it looked like the mental hospital would drive a normal girl nuts.

The Angelina Jolie character was supposed to be a real BPD, and didn't it come easily for such a limited actress!

by Anonymousreply 9711/02/2011

I'm pretty sure my mother had BPD. She was a cross between Faye Dunaway in Mommie Dearest and Eunice Higgins from Mama's Family.

by Anonymousreply 9811/02/2011

R97, What makes you think I was acting?

by Anonymousreply 9911/03/2011

R98=my nephew

by Anonymousreply 10011/03/2011

I thought Angelina's character was a sociopath. She's always saying how proud she is of that because they are so rarely women.

by Anonymousreply 10111/03/2011

Recovered memory syndrome is a skeevy, discredited theory. People who've been abused as children develop all sorts of problems precisely because they CAN'T block out what happened to them.

by Anonymousreply 10211/03/2011

My BPD ex-wife screamed at me because she asked me for money, and I didn't give her any. She said: I know I lost my money gambling but I don't have a husband to fall back on. Now mind you, she made $20,000.00/year more than me but wants me to bail her out if she loses her money gambling. She was a compulsive gambler and that would of made me go broke to keep bailing her out. They are definitely out for themselves period. She said that she works hard for her money (as if I didn't) and she can do whatever she wanted with it. I had to finally tell her she wasn't welcome in my home anymore. I feel sorry for anyone in a relationship with a borderline. She was actually a cluster B.

by Anonymousreply 10309/21/2012

A large portion of our population has some form of mental illness. They end up self-medicating with illegal drugs or drink, because it is cheaper and easier than paying for real treatment.

by Anonymousreply 10409/21/2012

So do people with BPD ever "cure" themselves with therapy? How many years does it take, if so?

I went no-contact on an ex that I believe had BPD. It was crazy-making already and I could see that it was only going to get worse (which he would have "relished" or at least enjoyed the complications, I feel). He went smack-bang into a long-distance relationship with someone else almost immediately afterwards and has it least twice tried to meet up to talk intensely about our original connection/love.

I decided to keep him at a distance, certainly while he is still in another relationship. But it's painful for me; I could and can see his issues, and he can too (he has said this), and I wonder whether he will ever change. Or maybe he is "fixed" in his new relationship, and I am just kidding myself that he was BPD (or possibly bipolar, which I think was his only official diagnosis years ago, which he claims his psychiatrist then changed her mind about).

Can they change / do they change? Will a different relationship "cure" them and their behavior?

by Anonymousreply 10509/21/2012

BPD bump.

by Anonymousreply 10609/22/2012

Here's a question? What do I do with my mother, who completely enabled my father's BPD and emotional abuse against me for decades?

My father was a cruel, nasty guy with intense BPD. He made my life miserable growing up, and I finally walked out of his life when I was 32 and never saw him again until a few years later when he was on his deathbed in a coma. I should have done it years before.

My mother spent my entire life enabling him - making excuses for his outbursts, telling me that I provoked him because of my "tone," because I used certain words he didn't like, etc. She has never taken any responsibility for her actions or her complicity in his abuse. Instead, even now she makes excuses, focusing on how much emotional pain he was in, and pretending she actually stood up to him and protected me. She has a long history of lying - certainly to me, probably to herself - in order to pretend that everything is fine. In essence, my mother decided to be a mother to my father rather than to me - probably because he was the one with the job that paid the bills, and it was easier to just crush me than to stand up to him.

For years we've had only the most superficial relationship because she simply wouldn't recognize the toxic family dynamic or do anything about it. He could have temper tantrums in public or pull whatever sort of juvenile behavior he wanted, and I was always at fault because I didn't accept and understand it. For years our entire relationship has been her babbling on about whom she's run into at the supermarket, what random cousins I've met three times in my life are dying of what form of obscure cancer, etc. There's never been any effort to reach out to me or deal with the mess of the past.

This year I finally got sick of the charade with my mother and had several huge blowup arguments on the phone with her (she's in IL, I'm in NY). I basically told her that she was a bad mother, that she had decades of opportunities to make my life better but refused to do so because she didn't want to be bothered, and that I wasn't sure I wanted her in my life anymore. Now she's calling me all the time and leaving voicemails, saying she misses me and that she loves me, blah blah blah. I think it's just that she's all alone - mid-70s, no siblings, dead husband, and her only child who doesn't want to deal with her - and is scared. But she still has shown absolutely no understanding of how she contributed to his abuse or that she has anything to make amends for.

Do I just cut her out of my life completely?

by Anonymousreply 10709/22/2012

[quote]What do I do with my mother, who completely enabled my father's BPD

Nothing. BPD is a mental illness. Are you saying people with mental illness aren't sick? If someone has the flu and you bring them soup you aren't enabling them.

That's insulting to all mentally ill people.

by Anonymousreply 10809/23/2012

r108, fuck off and die a painful death in a sewer.

by Anonymousreply 10909/23/2012

108 is clueless.

107, your mother didn't "enable" your father's abuse. It sounds like she was the primary abuser.

He was mentally ill. She was not. She was the healthy one. The one seeing the world clearly. Making rational decisions, informed choices. Or what she thought were.

by Anonymousreply 11009/23/2012

This thread has surprised me. Really. Some making (ridiculous) excuses and justification, a handful offering professional experiences and some spewing vitriol.

It doesn't really matter what the borderline's intent or internal struggle is to the people whose lives have been damaged. It only matters to the borderline, and they are most likely lying to everyone, including themselves, anyway.

If a person is toxic, stay away from them. You can't save people from themselves. Be clear about your reasoning:

"Mom, you're a hateful bitch who made my childhood a nightmarish misery. You still make me miserable and I don't want you in my life. Stop calling me. Good bye." Don't expect her to agree or validate your feelings or ever do anything but continue to be a miserable bitch. It's not going to happen.

"Friend, I'm sorry you are a borderline personality and I would help you if I could but you are trouble on two legs and I have my own issues to deal with. Stop calling me. Good bye." Yes, she/he will have a tantrum and trash you to anyone who will listen, but so what? Consider the source.

I know this sounds harsh, but half my family is bipolar (most unmedicated because the meds "make me feel like I'm not myself." Duh! That's the point!) and a few have worse things going on, including BPD. When I was younger I thought I had some obligation to fix them all but I finally realized that I couldn't and in fact I was just throwing my own energy into a black hole that nothing could ever fill. The little I could do just propped them up enough to make them worse. Yes, it's an awful thing that so many people are so profoundly damaged, but unless they really want help and are willing to work on it, including taking their meds, then you can do nothing for them but sacrifice yourself on the altar of their selfish needs.

/rant

by Anonymousreply 11109/23/2012

Huh.

Of all those "symptoms" of BPD in the OP's post, only a few seem to be true of me... but they're very strong. So I don't have BPD, but clearly I have something. Maybe it's just "trust issues"? These are the ones that are true of me, as far as I can tell:

- If someone fails to keep a promise, that person can no longer be trusted;

- If I trust someone, I run a great risk of getting hurt or disappointed;

I will always be alone;

- There is no one who really cares about me, who will be available to help me, and whom I can fall back on;

- I will never get what I want;

by Anonymousreply 11209/23/2012

The conclusion OP drew, that the borderline is the inverse of a narcissist, is simply a lie. They are not concerned with others so much that they forget themselves. On the contrary....

by Anonymousreply 11309/24/2012

R105

True borderline personalities employ splitting as a coping mechanism developed as vulnerable infants. They have not learned the basic lesson most infants achieve. That the source of all gratification (mother) sometimes is not available at the moment of need, but she will be available again and can be trusted. If course, borderlines have probably endured much more deprivation and neglect, even abuse, than most infants.

As adults, they idealize the love object, go to great lengths to win and please them. They fall in love quickly and often. This love object is the "good mother", the source of all good feelings. When their expectations and extreme needs can't be met they split, the all good object now becomes the bad object. This leads to the extremely dramatic ups and downs anyone who has had a relationship with one can attest to. They are often desperately pertinent but are unable to change the dynamic.

When a borderline leaves or is forced from a relationship, the partner is often amazed that the person who may have been near suicidal and clinging is very quickly into a new intense relationship. Another example of splitting.

R105 Advice: run quickly and far. He is not fixed, nor will he be. BPD patients are very difficult to treat.

by Anonymousreply 11409/24/2012

I don't have the faintest idea what you mean by borderlines being "desperately pertinent."

by Anonymousreply 11509/24/2012

R108 has no idea what "enabling" is, or why it's a bad thing.

by Anonymousreply 11609/24/2012

R115 I meant pentinent, damn autocorrect.

by Anonymousreply 11709/24/2012

lol penitent

by Anonymousreply 11809/24/2012

Thank you, r114.

by Anonymousreply 11909/24/2012

I have been in a LTR with someone with BPD for the past 7 years, and it is extremely difficult. When she had a good therapist/worked at her therapy, things were better. We had to move for my work, and her new therapist just goes through the motions, and so does my partner. She has fallen into a pattern of justifying outrageous behavior, twisting anything that is said to her into an insult, and picking fights at the drop of the hat. I do care about her, but our life together is becoming untenable. I know she suffered terrible trauma in her past, but I cannot continue to pay the price for the sins of her father.

by Anonymousreply 12009/25/2012

I find this thread to be much like all others regarding BPD. there is such a deliberate coldness for people who suffer from or struggle with this diagnosis. I self diagnosed myself with BPD after years of trying to find out why I felt like a frightened witness in my own mind and body. I suffered a traumatic brain injury in 1998, while still a teenager, and over many years began to feel completely disconnected from my thought processes. Major depression, anxiety, emotional disregulation, rage...all things I was all too aware of that I couldn't always control. No medication felt right in my still developing brain, and no halfassed therapy I would seek out seemed to fit my mind. I am now in my 30s, and basically terrified of becoming the mother with body that ruins her only child, after nearly dying from complications during his birth. I fear being the crazy girlfriend because I tried to act normal and did not make my emotional needs clear-therby setting myself up to lose my shit when I was truly mistreated. I resent being potentially labeled the kind of person who makes themselves the victim when I say I have opened up about my weaknesses and guilt and shame for what I thought were just shitty personality traits--and it left me the one manipulated, used, and invaded for. I believe that bpd is being used as a diagnosis for people who do really shitty things to their kids, their spouses, etc by people who want answers as to why their parent or spouse treated them so terribly. I suspect my mom had a touch of it, but she was more histrionic. All I know is the more I read on this disorder, the more convinced I am that I have it, wonder if the brain damage as a teen assigned me this fate, worry every day that one day my son will be like many of these poster's, so casual when it comes to unfeeling not giving a shit. I have been victimized, but don't consider myself a victim. I have suffered many traumas that would rightly fuck up anyone's mind. I am wary of meds because I think they did damage to my still growing mind. I know that I have done terrible things that I truly felt were beyond my control. I know a lot of the time I meet all 9 criteria for Bpd, but I also know that when someone is having a bad time in THEIR life, I am there to make them laugh and distract them for a moment. I have been told since I was young that I have a knack for making people feel better, and am often called upon just to listen to people vent. I am thanked for my ability to understand what is hurting others when they. cannot.

I do not have to try to understand what hurts people, it is natural. And I don't empathize so as to manipulate later, or expect them to empathize in return--although I think its kinda fucked up that wanting reciprocity in relationships is defined as a symptom of a disorder. I try to make everyone I know feel better when they are sad or angry or confused because I would value that interaction. And it makes me feel good about myself, like even though I have some shit wrong with me--it alone cannot define me. I am a whole person, capable of rage and insensitivity, impulsivity and desperation...but also generosity and brevity, supportive and kind, understanding and accepting.

...and the Bpd in me just has to say once again that all of you with your heartless directives to abandon people with bpd seem to have your own real issues, and if that is the attitude you bring to the table when dealing with someone who has this "horrible" disorder, no wonder they treat you like shit. Just because I have a hard time regulating my emotions doesn't mean I can't tell when someone is shitting on me...

by Anonymousreply 12112/31/2012

There will be mostly cloudy skies in NYC for tonight's NYE celebration. Times Square has been blocked off for tonight's celebration.

The phrases most unpopular include: Whatever and 24/7

The financial crisis loom

by Anonymousreply 12212/31/2012

Get some rest R121. It will all look different tomorrow.

by Anonymousreply 12312/31/2012

This thread is extremely helpful as I just left someone who suffers from BPD and I'm still dealing with the aftermath of that relationship. My therapist told me my ex probably suffers from BPD and told me to read a book on BPD's. My ex pretty much fits all the criteria! I was shocked. As someone who genuinely loved my partner (although I only managed to stay with her for less than a year), it's really hard to explain to my family and friends why I even stayed so long, given the level of emotional abuse. I was constantly blamed for being the source for all of her problems. Yet I still find it hard to cut all contact completely.

Maybe people could share stories of how they managed to cut all contact. How long it took them, etc. I'm really struggling with it, as my instinct is to at least stay friendly and try to help her. I know it's pointless....

by Anonymousreply 12401/04/2013

i know two women with the disorder..both have absolutely no genuine thoughts for the welfare of their (ex)girlfriends or friends, one of them has only one friend, who is also emotionally damaged. both have no social skills other than superficial chatter. there is no depth to them and when they are challenged, they are either 'too tired' or 'too busy' meaning, i know im losing this argument so i return to my default setting.

one wouldnt let her g/f have a phonecall without needing something done immediately, meaning the g/f would have to cut short her conversation, to attend the disorder's needs and therefore her fear of abandonment was allayed again. the other one would be very secretive about her phonecalls, even going out late at night and making up a story about going to help a friend etc..when she returned got very angry when challenged and turned it into the other persons problem that she wasnt trusted! both complete headfucks..they should come with health warnings like cigarettes

by Anonymousreply 12501/07/2013

so if you are in relationship with someone like that, is it best to completely remove yourself from their lives, even on a friend level?

by Anonymousreply 12601/08/2013

both of my friends said they wished they had left quicker, but as usual lesbians will go to the bitter end and by then all empathy for the ones with the disorder had gone. both of them want absolutely nothing to do with them as they are still blaming them for everything and anything. its a great relief that they are no longer the carer, mother, housekeeper, cook, etc. although one of my friends is having therapy to understand why she stayed so long.shes angry with herself for wasting her life with this person. personally i would either run a mile or i would only do what i wanted to do period. no leeway for 'madness'. none at all.

by Anonymousreply 12701/10/2013

I'm convinced one of my ex BFs had BPD. Charming, witty, smart to the public but angry, dark, and abusive when it was just the two of us. I told him it was over and he cried and said he was going to kill himself if I wouldn't see him. I was young and dumb and eventually let him creep back into my life. But then he got even more drunk, mean and controlling and I finally put my foot down and told him goodbye get out of my life. He thought he could guilt me back into the relationship - he'd send me letters, gifts, call me crying saying his father was dying, etc. I was scared he would do something violent towards me and would end up stalking me. He eventually drifted away and found someone else to torture. I looked him up recently - he has held down a fairly high level job and owns house. I can only imagine what he is like now, esp since some of you say one doesn't mellow w/ this illness. I booted him from my life 15 years ago. I used to think he was "just" an alcoholic narcissist but I see it was more than that esp w the suicide threats. Fascinating thread.

by Anonymousreply 12801/10/2013

I have an ex who had this along with being bipolar. The experience was like slamming a hammer into your head over and over. It put every other failed relationship I've ever had into perspective.

by Anonymousreply 12901/10/2013

BPD is of course a real disorder. It is also known as the wastebasket of psychiatric diagnosis, for difficult and unhappy people and lazy clinicians.

Like most personality disorders it is too casually thrown about by internet amateurs who have learned some new words. "Aspie's" do not exist as usually referred to out here.

The OP's definition is pretty on the mark and many others here have expressed their struggles with being borderline or being intimately attached to one. Many therapists refuse to take on this kind of individual and others take them on for the clinical study only.

BPD is the most difficult of personality disorders to treat as it basically requires re-parenting of very difficult adults. But it does exist on a spectrum and their are borderline borderlines, if you will. If self awareness and acceptance is present in the patient, there is hope.

Again I will say this is considered by most all serious clinicians to be a throwaway diagnosis in the common vernacular. I am not suggesting that anyone who has posted out here has not had a real experience, but the label does not always fit.

A true borderline is not without resources. They often have a lot of charm and tenacity. Initially, and sometimes lifelong they are more able to make connections with people in social and romantic relationships that have more depth than a narcissist or obsessive compulsive personality can achieve. Hence the pain and confusion that can be ensue. However even the most unconditional of love is unlikely to "cure" or bring stability to someone with BPD.

Most of the posters out here seem to know this and show a fair amount of insight. I repeat however, that it is a tossed about diagnosis and need not be applied to just anyone who has difficulty in feeling secure in relationships.

The best clinicians are not label obsessed, but use them diagnostically when they think it can be of some help to the patient's understanding and treatment. This others involved of course.

by Anonymousreply 13001/10/2013

[quote]Like most personality disorders it is too casually thrown about by internet amateurs who have learned some new words.

Do you include yourself? If not (and I would suppose not since you jaw on about it so), what are your qualifications then for being such an expert in the diagnosis and not another internet amateur? Are you a practicing clinician yourself? From where did you get your psychiatric degree and your training?

by Anonymousreply 13101/10/2013

I expected this sort of response and challenge and why not r131 ?

I am not BPD. I have made my statements and did not jaw on about anything. Often the most reasonable of opinions and facts are unacceptable to others. Nothing I said is controversial or in debate to mental health professionals.

I am not about to provide my clinical qualifications to you or to defend them.

I posted with all good intentions in accordance with my experience and training. My hope was to illuminate, not to discredit anyone.

by Anonymousreply 13201/10/2013

[quote]I am not about to provide my clinical qualifications to you or to defend them.

Then why in the world should we believe you in particular since you're tearing down other people's opinions on BPD? You raised the entire matter yourself by attacking others' opinions and simultaneously setting yourself up as the expert on BPD.

Frankly, unless you can provide some sort of credentials, none of us has any reason to accept your opinion than we do anyone else's here. You're just another Internet schmoe expressing his opinion.

by Anonymousreply 13301/10/2013

R22' is a flaming fag

by Anonymousreply 13401/10/2013

Speak for yourself, r133. R130 hit the nail whith the "re-parenting" thing. Must be a nightmare for therapists.

by Anonymousreply 13501/10/2013

I don't really understand why we need to be fighting about all of this. Everyone brings in valid insights, either from personal experience or more professional opinion. If you are trying to deal with someone who has this disorder, this thread is incredibly helpful. I am slowly giving up any hope that my love and my ability to withstand the mood swings will ever bring about any real change in my partner.

The difference between the narcissistic personality disorder and a BPD is fundamental though and I really appreciate someone explaining it so well here. It's helping me put all the missing pieces together.

by Anonymousreply 13601/11/2013

They want to be seen as good, and manipulate carefully to that end. The nice part seems to be an act, the snarly mean vicious stuff is too practiced not to be the core personality.

It was called Borderline because it was close to a psychosis, but not 100%... and when not in the throws of some emotion driven craziness, they can seem non-psychotic. The name is terrible as it doesn't sound very bad, and it is very bad. Dated a girl with it and she devastated me, caused me to lose my business, a good job, my marriage, and my self respect. It truly is me, me, me, me with them. The sex was great.. but it was just used to get you hooked, it wasn't love. They are insecure and driven by needs... their needs, not yours.

Avoid them for your sake.

by Anonymousreply 13701/11/2013

The over the top angry people who post on this thread are not BPD or NPD, they are people who have come in contact with one or the other, likely recent to their post. People with BPD can do alot of damage and cause incredible suffering and throw normal people way off. I just spent the weekend getting 48 hrs of ranting about how evil i am etc etc. When he bottomed out, he felt well and stable enough to tell me I am as mentally ill and the pot calling the kettle black. I've often wanted to film a BPD rage, they just dont get it! Being Wrong all the time in a BPD relationship causes a lot of anger. People with BPD seem really evil because they supposedly love you but turn on you so quickly. Not only that, they are sometimes unsafe, they destroy your property or get physically abusive. I think some Boderlines are capable of killing you in a rage. Be careful of these ppl! I have broken up today after suicide threats and the whole shebang. I tried to understand but the lack of empathy and the frequency of the rages was making me afraid and sick. Borderlines make you feel guilty for leaving them. I will say just RUN the other way, guilt is better than constant misery and fear which they NEVER comprehend. I am also very angry about this.

by Anonymousreply 13801/13/2013

Oh, I want to qualify my post above when I say that Borderlines 'never' understand the pain and fear they cause, Im talking about Active (not in therapy)

by Anonymousreply 13901/13/2013

I really identify with what a lot of you here said about BPD's and their partners. I too have wanted to record my girlfriend's rages, because I had never seen anything like that. The fights/rages were also over really trivial things and by the end of them, I was always blamed for being the mentally ill one and the one who is angry/evil etc, even though I never even raised my voice. The psychological damage it does to you, as their partner, is hard to describe. And yet, you get hooked to the great sex and the spontaneous and (positively) intense aspects of he relationship, so it's hard to leave. At least that's been my experience.

by Anonymousreply 14001/14/2013

I believe it's hard to leave because of co-dependancy and the Borderlines constant manipulations. After this last bout of rage, blame and fear (because he was saying he wanted to die etc, could not stop vomitting, crying), which had me worried sick- when he bottomed (this is the end of the cycle, energy spent out) he went out with friends to play music, seemed perfectly fine and texted me saying that I knew he was crazy and stuck around anyway so it's STILL my fault. At that point I had the greatest of all epiphanies, immediately cut off the relationship with NO talking or texting and every day since is better. When you get some distance you begin to realize how bad you were hurting, how much they manipulated you, how little all those 'feelings' they supposedly had actually meant, it was all about them, always will be and you, when the short adoration stage is gone- are just their punching bag of choice. I no longer believe 'they can't help it' I believe the action is well practiced and the core person. There IS control because they dont do it when it's important they NOT. They just get everyone doing what they want out of fear and creating chaos for attention and get off on it. They actually despise you- just cant deal with you leaving. Read articles from BPD sites when they tell you how they are, youll begin to believe they should all be locked up for the good of society, and themselves. for a Co-dep who is buying into that a Borderline will kill themselves if you leave them, guess what? a borderline is never alone for long, you'll be surprised how soon that suicidal crying screaming lunatic is in someone else's bed as soon as they find another adoring victim. It's better to leave them AFTER a major rant when theyre spent out, they will tell you to go fuck yourself and you can skip all the suicidal crap, and dont talk to them or they'll reel you back in. The longer You stay with one the sicker YOU will get. Beware.

by Anonymousreply 14101/14/2013

thank you for your thread, you summed up nearly every angle that bpd use for their own gains. as ive said in my previous threads, it can take a long time to realise that your not the 'unreasonable' and 'selfish' one in the realtionship, but you definitely are the 'unwilling victim'. i think also that when youre older maybe 40+ then you start to see things with a different outlook and are not in the 'young love' stage, when 'drama's' and 'making a scene' can be commonplace with just abt anyone. as someone on previous thread said they are called 'borderline' because they are 'borderline psychotic' which is very very scary! and sadly i dont think the knowledge of this state is common like bi polar or autistism is. so we are left with a very large number of people worldwide (im in uk) that are currently going about destroying their partners lives and its put down as 'they are highly strung', 'very emotional', 'difficult' etc etc..wow, so be on your guard and dont be afraid to walk away asap from the new relationship as soon as those bells start ringing!

by Anonymousreply 14201/14/2013

Slap a Haloperidol patch on a Borderline and they are almost tolerable.

by Anonymousreply 14301/14/2013

No you do...sorry but my mother is one..."Beautiful inside" not my momster..she is borderline and histrionic...narcissistic, too. If she had any empathy, it was for herself only..always the victim. She single handed lay ruined the lives of everyone around her and destroyed the extended family. Of course it was never her fault. She is an awful person ...no me can stand to be around her.

by Anonymousreply 14401/14/2013

Oh Gosh, just by this post I can feel your deep pain. Just know there are many here that get it. The best thing to do is make yourself better. Whatever that is, a gym, friends, movies, something and anything. Make sure you get up everyday and look for life, because it's yours for the taking.

by Anonymousreply 14501/15/2013

I have autism so I can do what I want and anyone who says otherwise is an AIDS infected homo.

by Anonymousreply 14601/15/2013

I'm finding this thread very helpful. I had a partner who must have had BPD and this is the first time I've read any insights that have really helped me to understand what it was.

She was actually great in lots of ways, whip smart, sexy and extremely fun. She did have, I believe, genuine compassion for me and others. She could be very caring and helpful to others and because she was so smart, she could be a lot of help. This was until her paranoia took over, which it always did. Then she was a nightmare, full stop.

She played out an abandonment scenario with me every few months-mostly she would abandon me and I would find myself begging her not to do it. Then we would have a "break up/closure talk" where I would be hauled into her court and have every last thing I ever said to her twisted back to me in ways I never meant. I would fight or resist these interpretations and end up apologizing for things I never said or did just to end the court session. Then she would proclaim us officially I would walk away heart broken and somewhat relieved to have the relationship finally over. Then she would call a few days or weeks later, crying because she was having a crisis or missing me etc... Then the whole cycle started again. I'm still not sure how or why I ended up putting up with this. I was at a low point in my life and the relationship did make me very happy for a brief few months. I kept stupidly thinking that we could just get back there, if she could learn to relax and trust me. (She had a nightmare childhood, of course) I had never had any relationship like it before and I didn't recognize myself in it.

Finally I walked away for good and stopped communicating with her after she sent me one crazy email too many. I still loved her though and was worried about her constantly. She committed suicide 3 months later and I have never been the same. I'm in a very good relationship now and grateful but something feels broken inside me. I'm always worried something will go wrong and I can't enjoy it as much as I should. I feel very guilty both towards her and towards myself for ever being involved in that mess. I feel like I was the final trigger for her. I know it's not my fault but it still feels like some awful twist of fate that I could have avoided if I hadn't been lonely and stupid.

by Anonymousreply 14701/15/2013

R147 your story hits so close to home for me. My ex girlfriend, from whom I just separated, but she is stringing me along and I still love her, sounds a lot like your ex girlfriend. The behavior of twisting my words, making me apologize for things I don't think I ever said or meant, threats of suicide, lack of trust.

The paranoia is what was the hardest part to take, because I always felt like I was dealing with imaginary problems and how can you even begin to resolve something that doesn't exist?

R147 I wish there was a support group for (ex) partners of BPD's because it's been extremely helpful to compare notes. Thank you for sharing your story.

by Anonymousreply 14801/15/2013

Re 147 Babe, I feel your pain and you know it was not your fault. These folks threaten suicide all the time, about 10% do it , most don't. She could never trust you, because there are two things here: While being in a loving relationship is ALL they desire, being in one is like being in a burning building, so there is no solution for them, or you. They just torture themselves and make close relationships the catalyst for it, and your life would have been hell, perhaps ruined had you stayed. I truly hope you find lasting peace, if it was not you it would have been someone else. It's no real reflection on you, BPD is prevalent and any of us who came across one just wished it never happened, to us or them. Be well and happy, and enjoy your great relationship to the fullest. You are very lucky and probably a great person, and know that it's just what is was, a horribly unlucky situation, like a car accident. Peace to you, you deserve it, and all good things in life.

by Anonymousreply 14901/16/2013

I have BPD. I didn't ask to have it. From the responses on here to the post I notice and accept that people are angry about the way they have been treated by people with the disorder it probably isn't easy to deal with some one with it but I just feel like I should say that calling us psyco is a bit harsh.

To paint a picture for you: imagine a little girl the age of five who is cute with pigtails think of the cutest girl you can up until that age her parents have never told her they hAte her they discipline but with good reason. Let's say the mother of that child has two children 16 months apart and the father loses his job and has to take 2 low paying jobs and is never home. The mother starts to suffer post natal depression and beginIs to lock the little girl out side. One day the little girl desperately needs to go to the bathroom. she knocks Nd knocks on the door asking 'mummy please let me come in I need to go" the mother looks at the little girl through the security door and eithe ignore her or just is so stressed she can't really cope. The little girl wets herself the mother gets angry at her and puts her in a diaper and parades her down the street.

Welcome to my life as a child almost every day. Ok so maybe I should just get over it but if you saw this happen wouldn't it make you feel some thing. I'm also not saying our behavior is socially acceptable and not harmful I'm just trying to let you know what it takes to get us to where we are at.

Spare a thought next time you know of any one abusing their child and get the parents help so the child might not need it later.

by Anonymousreply 15001/17/2013

I always feel like things are my fault with my BPD when their is some kind of argument with family spouse ect

by Anonymousreply 15101/17/2013

R149 I like your quote "While being in a loving relationship is ALL they desire, being in one is like being in a burning building" because this is exactly the hell I have been dealing with with my ex girlfriend who suffers from BPD. She literally tortured me while in the relationship, then built some kind of a case against me that let her believe she couldn't trust me just so she could "justifiably" torture me more. All the love and compassion in the world can't change those people though and I was so emotionally depleted with her, I was miserable all the time, even though I really love her.

To the person who says she has BDP, I see hope for you because at least you realize that. My ex would never admit to it and actually said I had it, or other people in her circle had it. If she can't own up to her own behavior, there is little hope, but you can actually make a lot of progress with the awareness. Good luck!

by Anonymousreply 15201/17/2013

Several people here have asked about trying to maintain friendships with borderlines being ex's etc. Also about letting go for good. As a person who had a borderline mother and a recent ex boyfriend who is still trying to manipulate me and I've posted here several times, it's not that I have ultimate answers but have done adequate research I think to comment. Friendship means both people understand what 'friendship' is. You need to assess if this is TRUE. Doubt it, seriously. You will notice that BPD's are usually in constant crisis, either losing their wallet or other personal items like keys or locking themselves out of car or house, car problems, other relationship problems, going to jail, , being sick or injured which is a big one, constantly screaming for help or attention. Late night calls or loving, then either clingy , break down or nasty emails/texts. I have noticed that once you make a first 'out reach' of compassion- they try to get you 'back on the hook.' It may look innocuous at first, they may text with a true pertinent matter, so you respond. The next thing will usually be something that presses YOUR buttons, creating a need for Your response AGAIN, even an angry one will give them what they need. This is the reeling in process and you can find yourself right back where you started or stopped, even spending your day now thinking WTF! I have managed this by setting boundaries 'I ' stick to. (don't expect them to) You will know when you are being manipulated, especially if you give yourself enough time away. Don't answer phone or text after any time you deem correct, no matter what the texts or VM say. No matter if they are locked out, need a ride, breaking down...don't answer. They learn you are not the go-to person. I have said, in the calm time, if you are feeling suicidal go to the hospital, call your best friend, Do not call me! They don't go to the hospital or call their best friend because they would be embarrassed, and because YOU as an ex , friend or whatever are the victim of choice. They pick the best and most compassionate to their cries, you must not be this person, it's a sum lose game for you. Once the camel's nose is under the tent so to speak. There are other people to call if the crisis is real, but they don't, because usually it isn't, This is about Your attention which sooner rather than later- you will be reviled for. As far as 'leaving' and how to? The BEST thing to do is cut off communication entirely and go through WHATEVER YOU Will Go Through- loneliness, withdrawl from your own co-dep, sit with it and know you chose survival- do not engage. Get up and shower everyday, take a walk, look at the beauty in your life, even if it's the little things. Block them from Facebook, dont read their FB page , dont watch them or listen to BS they say on FB, or get screwed up because all their friends are sympathizing with them. Remember that while you likely got a little isolated in the relationship and it seems they didn't, you will recoup, their life is hell in their own mind and all this posturing is FAKE. Each day away is a better day for you. With time away from the entire nuts that was your life, you will see the lies (OMG, the lies come up suddenly and you ask, were they really sick that day, was so and so at work really such a bitch etc), You see the manipulations more clearly, you will be stronger. Fight with all you have your own co-dependency and partake of alcohol or drugs at a minimum, since they make your resolve weak. I take walks, even in the cold. I look around and breathe fresh air and remember who I was and who I am. See friends if you can manage it. I have a little trouble with this (post traumatic stress) but am trying, and my friends keep calling and texting every day, and I take comfort in this. Eat and sleep early and well. Every day is better than the last, that I know for sure. Soon you will be back to your life loving, happy self. Take comfort in the peace you have now and discount the loneliness, it will pass. Know you loved well and will love again. Peace.

by Anonymousreply 15301/17/2013

I dont know you or your ex. I apologize on their behalf also being a sufferer of bpd. It hits pretty hard to home for me to hear what your saying as i myself have done things like that in the past and it breaks my heart that you had to suffer such pain.

You have a great heart and I hope that you have the most amazing relationship ever in the future. Actually I know you will.

I just really feel for you and want you to feel better.

by Anonymousreply 15401/18/2013

Wow Sonja thank you so much for your words. It's both painful and reassuring to read as I try to maintain a relationship with my BPD ex (still so in love with her). I do see all the lies and manipulations and how isolated and small my world has become, as many things and people that were in my life somehow made her feel insecure and I started to get rid of them one by one. It's both sad and painful to realize that you are right. Cutting off all contact is the only way to go. And I too suffer from post traumatic stress as a result. I don't want to see any new people, I barely even want to see friends. Again, thank you for your words and sharing your experience. It's so valuable and validating to know that I am not the only person who has gone through that. Thank you.

by Anonymousreply 15501/18/2013

this is for sonja..your post was spot on and actually made me laugh cos all i remember is my friends having to cut short their time with me or other friends because the bpd ex had either: lost the door keys, lost their purse, lost the car keys, lost their passport, lost their travel card, lost the vouchers after making you go to the store to spend, flooded the house after 'bleeding' the radiator?, the cat was sick, the electric lights wont work, cant work the washing machine, cant turn cooker on, their mum/dad/brother has turned up unexpectedly, oh and their only other friend cant meet them after all. all needing the return of the poor wretched partner. so yes absolutely/completely/utterly NO contact. they will find a new victim asap anyway. cheers

by Anonymousreply 15601/27/2013

Well, I can talk but don't walk the walk too well. I'm cyber stalking my ex-learning about more elaborate lies every day. Maybe I'm learning or just self torturing. Perhaps you have to convince yourself youre right. it's incredibly frustrating that they have all this 'support' , friends and concern on Craackbook. You feel so foolish, while you sit alone and know theyre a goddamn psychopath, and watch them date and get new people to 'feel their pain', and say bad things about you, then call you and lie through their teeth about how bad it is for them, then laugh with their friends, when you truly are in pain and your stomach is in knots all the time. It's really the most sickening shit I've ever known. I have to ask myself WHY, as if the myriad of lies aren't enough? I need more proof? Or I resent their facade of lies that have other people convinced they are the one 'wronged'. My phone is kinda dead, without all those texts of love or desperate calls for help. You get addicted to that shit. The space becomes empty all of a sudden. You dont quite know what to do with all the freetime, as you see them move on to another victim, you almost feel abandoned yourself. You know it's for the best,... it just feels incredibly UNFAIR.

by Anonymousreply 15701/30/2013

Way back in the thread someone suggested that anyone that had mean things to say about a BPD individual were all hateful narcissists that did not have empathy. Well, let me dare go down that path of having something unflattering to say of BPD. My ex-wife is diagnosed as having BPD. She came clean on her cheating during our marriage, but wont tell all about cheating the 4 years we lived together before marriage, but admits that she has cheated our whole 17 years together. About three times a year she would sexually or emotionally cheat. She would have sex with me sometimes minutes after having sex with another man, some whose names are unknown to her, and some while totally sober. I would kiss her and kiss her stomach unknowingly just after she had had sex or gave oral to some guy. She thought she was in live each time of course, most of these guys she knew and were married and would keep a secret and she had a thing for if THEY showed any flattery towards her. l was home with our three children and these nights out could be out with co-workers to a girls night out or a birthday party gone wrong. She was a total chameleon. So, in her case, the only empathy she has is for herself. She is aware of her pain and distortions, but she cannot put herself in anyone else's shoes nor imagine the humiliation, health risk, ruined life, betrayal and stress that they put someone through. Trust me, I carried her though a decade of clinical depression and paid for all things anyone could want and need. I left here (and me) penniless in the end. She was a secret spender and I have our three children. She is not maternal and cannot stand to be around her kids for more than 40 hours straight (less than two days). So for those that say they are misunderstood and have too much empathy and sensitivity...I say that is bullshit. She is directly evil and male sexual attention is a problematic desire in the bulk of all BPD cases. You just have not found out about it yet or never will. I am a very aware person and she was so stealth. I also find that they partner (become best friends) with females that honor "girl code" and share much of the same immorality. My ex begs me daily for me to take her back. She is on mood meds and had doubled in size. I hate to see her physical health suffer from her weight issues and the loss of her attractiveness, but this is God's doing I suppose. Vengence is his...which is probably fair because she targeted my friends and co-workers and was successful in bedding some of them WHILE I would be with them. She would sneak off on our few date nights that we got per year to go sit and talk to men she had been with if we were out listening to music and come back and say "Oh that was someone I graduated with. I was just asking if his wife was feeling better, she had been sick." When in reality, she now admits that she went over and got a smack on the butt and got a high from the risky flirtatious act that was way over the line. She is sick and will be forever. Hopeless and likely a true psychopath. Her sister and mother are evil people that manifest destruction and human turmoil wherever they go. So, I dare you to tell my damaged children how empathetic their BPD mother is. I dare you. Oh, and get a DNA test if you have kids with a BPD woman. I would consider it essential. She is a rabid liar. Mood meds (anti-psychotics, same as they would give a diagnosed psychopath) slow the demon down a lot, but her thought process and fantasy of men, no empathy, lies by omission in general is unchanged - it is just slower in nature. Anti-depressants make it worse and are not recommended per the DSM manual for clinicians. They only disinhibit the beast within and make it worse as far as acting out.

by Anonymousreply 15801/30/2013

My therapist once described BPD people as having ' a giant hole in them that can never be filled' , though God knows, they try. The neediness, constant attention - it's exhausting. Really, no matter how much is done for them, it's never enough. A giant hole .

by Anonymousreply 15901/30/2013

The problem with borderlines is that they always have to focus on someone to alienate. Someone in their family, someone at their job. You just know it is a matter of time until your number is up. It's all bullshit that they repair after 40 years of age. They freak when they can't cause drama and then run to the suicidal manipulations. Let them kill themselves. Let them go.

by Anonymousreply 16001/30/2013

My BPD ex never really attempted suicide but constantly threatened she would die, she was always "dealthy ill" and had many medical problems, yet at the same time she was the most in shape and resilient person I have ever met. It took me months to figure out the lies and manipulations. That when she claimed she was so sick she couldn't get out of bed, calling doctors etc, it was all lies which she used to elicit sympathy and get attention. Her illness was also something she used when I wanted to make plans with other people. I was always made feel guilty and had to cancel my plans to stay home and take care of her.

by Anonymousreply 16101/31/2013

[quote]If others really get to know me, they will find me rejectable and will not be able to love me; and they will leave me;

From reading this thread, that would seem to be a rational, well-founded belief.

by Anonymousreply 16201/31/2013

To NoBDP4me and {R 160] Gosh what horror. I find myself having thoughts I never thought I would have, like maybe they just will die in a car accident and it would all be over and no one else would be terrified or abused by them anymore. I called the cops on mine while he was breaking everything in the house. He thinks he got off scott free at pre-trial-but the DA called today and said they are pursuing. This is not actually good for me because I've been struggling to move on and this daily entanglement is what is killing me. The authorities actually dont care about me, its all about Grants for Programs. I said to them, this is not worth the town time and cost, plus he will be REALLY pissed now, and they said theyll take out an order of protection for me. I'm like , Yeah Right! because the LAW works so well to keep a maniac from losing their shit at your back door, didnt work the first time! They said, But this was a crime! (Caveat- but he wont do jail he'll just go to anger management classes. ) Then I'm thinking, How much is this costing the town for nothing? So you want to prosecute so he can go to anger management classes? Plus I apparently have a 'victims advocate' now too. Ok, he owes me $900 for a broken laptop. How much is the town spending on all this? Now he needs a lawyer, I'm in this for months, there are victim advocates, prosecutors, DA, judges, programs, I mean fuck me. All I wanted was for the cops to get a maniac off my porch before I shot that mutherfucker dead if he breeched my window. I dont think State run 'anger management' classes are in the least part or solution to this persons problem, plus it's putting me in more danger than before. But oh no, its now an 'issue' that will drag me into connection for months. The sick part of this is , you Have to watch when you bring authorities into the mix, they do not forget you. This endless redtape will make people less likely to call for help when they need it.

by Anonymousreply 16301/31/2013

[R162] You bet! The reason is, anyone 'getting to know' a Borderline will be so badly abused they cannot possibly deal with it. Getting to know a Real person with a few problems, you can deal. We all 'get to know people', deeply and affectionally and accept their faults along with their good parts. But with a BPD- you are not getting to know anyone real. You just think you know a lying, manipulating, emotional vampire, not anything like a person. True, they are so in pain they don't think they are bad, believe the world is all about them, even when they are absolute evil in their actions. That's the problem. Getting to know a Borderline is Your utter demise, so YES, a self ful filling prophesy on their part ." If you get to know me you will hate me and leave me" Damn straight, anyone with a heart and a brain and any level of self preservation would and must do, to survive. Dont twist this like it's the outside world's fault for not accepting this insanity, detriment and pain. We do not need to accept this behavior, all baby tantrums and damage for YOU. It's the BPD who needs to understand that the behavior is not acceptable, and it's up to you to change, not for us to tolerate.

by Anonymousreply 16401/31/2013

Why can't any of these posters who have experience with BPDs ever once use the return button twice? It separates text into separable paragraphs and makes it ten times easier to read.

Look, you just hit

[return]

[return]

and you have separated your text into paragraphs. That's all you have to do. You will make other people reading your posts much happier.

It comes across as crazy if you don't do it, and we suspect you yourselves actually have BPD and are trying purposefully to annoy other people when you don't do it.

by Anonymousreply 16501/31/2013

Well aren't you the intelligent one!

Most of us did separate paragraphs but the site put them all together, so thanks for telling us how to do it. (return) (return) Obviously you are some person who cannot read content, but relies on stupid shit like structure.... hiiisssssss! Take your BPD anger out on your therapist, or take a class in reading.

by Anonymousreply 16601/31/2013

Classic BPD response! Do not address the issue just the context and call 'others crazy'. Pick on something irrelevant, pick an argument over it and distract from the real problem, the BPD psycho- themselves.

Clear as day right here.

by Anonymousreply 16701/31/2013

[quote]Most of us did separate paragraphs but the site put them all together,

You only used the space bar once.

by Anonymousreply 16802/01/2013

Sonja, I say this with love;

by Anonymousreply 16902/01/2013

BPD people are sick fucks who would all ideally be locked up in asylums if they still existed.

by Anonymousreply 17002/01/2013

@[169] Go fuck yourself.

by Anonymousreply 17102/01/2013

[quote]My therapist once described BPD people as having ' a giant hole in them that can never be filled' , though God knows, they try.

I know exactly how they feel.

by Anonymousreply 17202/01/2013

Sonja comes across as so sane and reasonable and measured on this thread.

by Anonymousreply 17302/01/2013

Of course I'm not sane, reasoned or measured. I just got out of a relationship with a BPD! No one can be sane under those circumstances. There are holes in my drywall , a destroyed laptop and Iphone thrown into the fields, the law involved, business and personal relationship over, you bet- I'm off my fucking rocker. And So What is it to you? Do you feel you must kick someone when they're down? That tells a lot more about you than me.

by Anonymousreply 17402/01/2013

Go back to the squirrels' storebin, nutsy.

by Anonymousreply 17502/01/2013

Your life obviously sucks ass, since your a hateful cunt. Mine will get better. Yours will not, since youre a hateful cunt. Probably a BPD making everyone in your life miserable.

by Anonymousreply 17602/04/2013

Sonja, I read all your posts and found them very insightful you truly understand how is was to be in a relationship with a borderline an experience only people who have been thriugh it know I can't really add much to your posts since their so accurate imo, but I will say this my first red flag was here her impatience it was not normal impatience also very hypocritical People.

Anyway I appreciate your input...I usually don't reply on messageboards much anymore but your posts inspired me to write. YOU have a comrad here.

Peace&Love

by Anonymousreply 17702/05/2013

Sonja I also sympathize with you. Only people who have dealt with a BPD can understand how damaged it leaves the other partner. And I really do understand the emptiness that comes after cutting off contact, because BPD's put in so much of their energy (both positive and negative) onto you, so when that goes away, it leaves you feeling so empty. You realize you were addicted to that attention.

by Anonymousreply 17802/05/2013

178. Its definitely an addiction to the attention also toxic shame. The thing is that they live fantasy land so much and play so many mind games to avoid pain while inflicting pain its simply a no win situation they're not fit for adult relationships too immature and childish imo they hate truth They want to follow a script they've created in their mind that always changes depending on their mood at the moment.

by Anonymousreply 17902/05/2013

BPD here, relatively high functioning and on meds and ok outside of romantic relationships. I understand the burden this disorder can place on people when untreated, but the level of cruelty here makes me sad. I'm not really angry, I just don't get it...why so mean? Is it because its easy to hide behind a computer and spew hateful words that you wouldn't say face to face? I gotta say my latest guy has been great with me but only after I agreed to take my meds and control over my life. Still, even in my rages, I don't recall being as nasty and unprovoked as some of the comments I'm reading. All human beings are at some point 'me me me.' This thread serves no purpose other than to spread viciousness.

by Anonymousreply 18002/08/2013

Borderline Personality(BPD) and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are closely linked. It is very common for someone to have degrees of both these disorders. These disorders are at epidemic proportions for females in the USA at this time. Men need to be educated about this. What usually happens is a man and woman have a relationship for any lenghth of time. But eventually the relationship becomes completely dysfunctional due to the female BPD and NPD disorders.

To those that are unaware... it appears like it's the mans fault... but the reality is that the woman's behavior towards the man she is in close relations with...is sociopathic. MEN BEWARE!! Does anyone else out ther know what I'm saying???

by Anonymousreply 18102/14/2013

Is r181 Debra Winger?

by Anonymousreply 18202/14/2013

what the hell - this is like the Today Show threads with people wandering in from nutso dullsville

by Anonymousreply 18302/14/2013

[quote]This thread serves no purpose other than to spread viciousness.

Well dud...this is Datalounge....pointless bitchery is why we are here. Please read the directions before participating......

by Anonymousreply 18402/14/2013

Could people in this thread state at the beginning wheter they are a man or a woman?

I like to skip the female posts.

by Anonymousreply 18502/14/2013

R182 Nope, It's Chris Brown. It appears that it's Chris's fault but it's really Riri who is making him punch her out.

by Anonymousreply 18602/14/2013

Clearly, Glen Close in Fatal Attraction! MD 'House' is a Borderline, pointed out to me recently, a cutter, addict, liar, manipulator, weak sense of compassion/empathy except when it suits his needs, brutally fun to watch, not so much to 'live' for best friend and lover, if it were real. I dont think this thread is simply vicious, there is a lot of pain expressed, but who would expect a BPD to admit that? Since BPD is often tied up with NPD and addiction, black outs and self involvement really help them in their utter denial of any responsibility or wrongdoing. It's always someone else's fault. Like in Silver Linings Playbook- Youre Crazier than me! Yaaa- SUUURE!

by Anonymousreply 18702/19/2013

Who are you to decide what I do or do not understand on a topic that we have never discussed?

One of the things that you do not have to worry about is excessive identification with others.

by Anonymousreply 18802/20/2013

Dw. I know exactly what u mean!

by Anonymousreply 18903/02/2013

What is the best way to drive Bordeline to suicide? I know one who irritates me and I'd like to give her a little nudge to get her going in the right direction (which is off a cliff)

by Anonymousreply 19003/02/2013

The best advice in the world that anyone can give someone close to a BPD person is to encourage them to RUN AWAY and to STAY AWAY from the BPD person. It's the only way to a decent life for yourself. You must cut them out of your life completely - no matter what.

Those of you posting here who have BPD and are dismayed at the response really just need to shut the fuck up. You are a BPD person and you have never been on the receiving end of you. You inflict your vicious craziness on other people and then whine when the best anyone can say to them is to run away from you.

Don't like it? Too fucking bad. No one deserves the shitrain from hell that you put people through. No one deserves the devastation you bring to the lives of others. No one needs to feel sorry for you, you spend your entire life feeling sorry enough for yourself.

Leaving you alone is actually BETTER than you deserve, after the way you treat people. So really, spare us the "oh how can you all be so MEAN" bullshit. Those of us who really know BPD know that you are just being manipulative, self-pitying, attention-seeking assholes - as usual.

by Anonymousreply 19103/02/2013

R191, just because a loved one insulted you once, it does not make them a "borderline." Get a grip.

by Anonymousreply 19203/02/2013

R192, I will put my real world, real hell experience with a BPD person up against whatever the fuck you think you know, any day of the week.

So fuck off, cunt.

by Anonymousreply 19303/02/2013

Everytime a borderline dies and angel get it's wings.

by Anonymousreply 19403/02/2013

BDP..definitely live in fantasyland they need to grow up take responsibility and start living in the real world and stop manipulating ppl with their mind games period!

by Anonymousreply 19503/02/2013

BPD..my mistake

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by Anonymousreply 19703/03/2013

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by Anonymousreply 19803/06/2013

What a great thread. I completely agree with the advice to cut these people out of your life as soon as possible. They will never change because they can never accept that there is something wrong with them. I was fooled for too long by someone who it's clear now had BPD. They will say whatever they can to get the desired response from you and if you tell them a contradictory statement they made before, they will have no idea what you're talking about. They are always the victim, even when they act out in a rage.

OP is entirely wrong in describing their empathy, but is right in how emotional they are. They don't care at all for anyone but themselves. There is no hope for dealing with them. Unless they are family, cut off all communication. They feed on it. They're sick.

by Anonymousreply 19903/06/2013

Some people are just assholes.

by Anonymousreply 20003/06/2013

I'm sorry, but if you think empathy is a cardinal marker in BPD, then you need help.

Lack of concept for Boundaries Explosive inappropriate anger Fear of abandonment Anger with a strong subcurrent of anxiety paramount Child-like emotional patterns

These are the meaty part of the curve for all BPD "sufferers" and that's because everyone else suffers as much as they do.

Yes, I am in the field.

BPD is also estimated at 3% of the population (most women). This is not allowing for the fact that probably 90% of BPD sufferers think the world is just 'ked up, not them. Think more like 12-15% of mainly women. Then you start to get scared....

by Anonymousreply 20103/06/2013

I'm so confused. I love knowing about all the various disorders...but this one is tough!!! I don't understand it.

Name a famous film or literary character who you'd say has BPD order...that may help.

by Anonymousreply 20203/07/2013

LMFAO @ R182. That was awesome.

by Anonymousreply 20303/07/2013

Does anyone know of any support group in NYC for people who have been or are in a relationship with a BPD? I have been taking care of my partner who is BPD and I don't know how to free myself of this situation. I almost feel powerless to do that.

by Anonymousreply 20403/07/2013

I "know" someone on another online forum who exhibits some of these BPD traits, mostly the one about being unable to take, or even see his own responsibility in some of the shit that happens to him.

And he's so open about everything, he practically drowns us in so much detail about his life that people have been able to take said information and use it against him in real life. He just got fired from a job he purportedly really wanted, because someone on that forum reported him to his employer.

Yet, it's the employer's fault this guy did what he did, then talked about it online. The maybe BPD guy had nothing to do with it. It was the person who reported him's fault. His employer's fault.

Does this describe BPD?

by Anonymousreply 20503/07/2013

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by Anonymousreply 20603/11/2013

Im 20. Ive been told I have bpd. Reading this. Well... there is no hope for me is there... or any of us. I wish they still did labotomys.

by Anonymousreply 20703/15/2013

I know of people with BPD who have gotten better as they got older, alongside taking dialectical behavioral therapy, R207. So don't be discouraged!

by Anonymousreply 20803/15/2013

R207 The fact that you acknowledge your BPD diagnosis and are looking for information puts you miles ahead of most people with the disorder. It isn't easy and it is a lot of work, but you CAN get better if you really want to and are willing to put in the time and effort to change the maladaptive thinking patterns and behaviors that are the hallmarks of BPD. Good luck!

by Anonymousreply 20903/15/2013

[quote]You all misunderstand borderline personality.

No. It's not that we don't understand - it's just that we don't care OP.

by Anonymousreply 21003/15/2013

[quote]Name a famous film or literary character who you'd say has BPD order...that may help

One of her biographers made a good case for Marilyn having it.

by Anonymousreply 21103/15/2013

As someone with BPD, it's absolutely crushing to read these replies.

I internalize so much of my emotions. I do not destroy my relationships, my family, etc. It's also ableist to use terms "nuts, psycho, crazy." Society needs to grow out of this stigmatizing. I didn't ask for BPD.

& I just want help.

by Anonymousreply 21203/19/2013

This thread has been very enlightening. My sister in law has always been emotionally unstable, but she's recently gone completely off the rails, blaming her parents for things that happened 40 years ago, thinking everyone is a thief and a cheat and out to get her, and generally rewriting history. It's unnerving to be around her, and I don't think she'll ever get the help she needs or take medication.

by Anonymousreply 21303/19/2013

I have BPD. The person I hurt the most enabled me. He let me walk all over him.

I'm now in a relationship with a man i love and who will not put up with BPD behavior but he's mostly blind to manipulating effectionate side. The raging, angry, defensive, blaming side he has never seen in me and it's been a major struggle to hide it. When the "evil" surfaces, which it does about every 2 or 3 months, he is very strict in dealing with it immediately. During these times I secretly fully HATE him.

When he's working or with his family or friends I know suicide would be better than the empty hollow dispair I feel. Sometimes I punish him for spending time with his friends instead of me by not seeing him when he asks but really I'm just wanting him to feel the pain of how he made me feel when he abandoned me. During these times I secretly fully HATE him.

He doesn't know I have BPD.

I decided when the relationship ends i will end my life. Ive already wrote the note. I hate who I am and how I feel and after this charade is over there wont be energy to continue another one and I'm not going back to the endless pain of rages and the horrors they make. I hate me, I hate the emptiness, I hate the hollow feeling, I hate hating someone i love, I hate not being able to control my emotions, i hate manipulating someone I love. We BPD people manipulate for one reason. To make you love us because we know we are unlovable.

We're not narcissistic, we're desperate to hide our unlovable empty selves and to make you fill our bottomless empty unlovable soul.

by Anonymousreply 21403/21/2013

Yes, DL you don't know shit about borderline personality. And method acting, and realpolitik, and the Kinsey scale, and....

by Anonymousreply 21503/21/2013

Despite all the crap re. men vs. women, this post has been helpful to me in understanding a good friend who I knew had some kind of psychological issue but I could never put my finger on what exactly it was. He gets into weird emotional/angry tirades then won't let go, blaming everything and everyone for all that's wrong in his life, see's the world and interpersonal issues in a very black and white manner (he even admits he cannot deal with unresolved/unresolvable issues), tells people what he thinks they want to hear with a huge amount of charm then turns on them when they do something he perceives as a slight etc., regards the entire world as revolving around him and his needs with little real emotional empathy for others (except in impersonal terms such as tragedies that don't involve anyone he actually knows). He uses people for what they can give him, then is willing to dump them when they have no more to give or are unwilling to give him what he thinks they should. Most of his casual relationships seem to involve people he meets over the internet who don't live anywhere near him (and he has very little chance of actually meeting). I don't have much emotionally invested in the relationship so whether or not he comes or goes isn't much issue but I think the trick to dealing with people like this is to be supportive within reason and not get drawn into all their drama--to be able to walk away.

by Anonymousreply 21603/21/2013

Therapists are MONSTERS when it comes to people who need help the most. They are ALL advertised on the Psychology Today database and ALL of them are Monsters when someone with BPD tries to get to see one of them. They will tell any lie to get out of it, they will fail to return a call and lie about the reason, they will then call on SUNDAY when they were supposed to call on a MONDAY...just to throw you off....so they can thrust it in...ie: no "openings" no interest, no professional ethics. I think their favorite lie is they have no room. Who can ever prove this? As a result there is NO HELP for borderlines. And that fraudulent cheap-shop "CBT" crap is worse than simply being offed because it is abuse-in-action. "CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS OR ELSE" can be accomplished with horsewhips and torture too. GOD help you if you have BPD cause NO ONE else will.

by Anonymousreply 21703/24/2013

R214, are you in therapy? Please don't feel that it's hopeless and that suicide is the best option. I wish you good luck and peace.

by Anonymousreply 21803/24/2013

First off, part of the disorder is psychotic. They are capable of pushing away guilt. For instance, my ex would put me down and swear at me, and then shortly after act like nothing happened. Then if I brought up the fact that she did it, she would then put me down and swear at me. That is clearly someone who is not empathetic but who only cares of themselves. I have heard it described that BPD's can empathize as long as it doesn't affect their needs. As soon as their "survival" is impacted they will tear your head off. They are the worst people to be involved with and to define them as having big hearts is just crazy. My ex would have a big heart for strangers, not her own family. In my opinion it all seemed like an act. She knew not to yell at me and put me down in front of strangers or people we didn't know well. She was in control of her emotions to a degree and clearly seemed to understand right from wrong in those instances of constraint until we got behind closed doors or in the car. To me that shows she could control it and yet didn't. Big heart my @ss.

by Anonymousreply 21904/02/2013

OP, you understand that DSM diagnoses are basically for the convenience of insurance companies, right? All other mental conditions are theoretical and hardly definitive.

by Anonymousreply 22004/02/2013

"order for borderline personality to develop, an invalidating environment with and a highly sensitive person MUST BE present. "

that's not true... I have an amazing home with amazing parents that constantly tell me an my sister how stellar we are. We also have grown up very sheltered, Suburbia upper middle class lives.

My sister still has developed borderline personality disorder. I like that you dispelled the myth of having little empathy but you encouraged another one the 'trauma myth' that some hardship in life is needed to develop a disorder. False

Enjoyed this article though!

by Anonymousreply 22104/03/2013

r212 STFU and go back to Tumblr where you belong.

by Anonymousreply 22204/03/2013

I think you hit my reason for bpd on the head.

BTW to people hating...

people without BPD do horrible things too. If anything its worse because they have control of their emotions and still do it.

so go fuck a camel.

by Anonymousreply 22304/07/2013

I agree getting upset at these posts really does no one any good,however,listing the people that get upset hear as having the worst cases of all perhaps in an attempt to rise above them is no better or worse than the people you are trying to put down,they for sure have fell in love with these people and hurt! I understand their anger . And being with a beautiful woman and lover for 3 years i can say this,it was the most passionant,fever piched turn table of love I really would not want to miss,and the most hateful,evil,insulting spirit burnt time in my life,She never could admit her mistakes because in her eyes she did them from my actions,she would fight about anything and I would try to put logic to it when she only knew I did not understand what she was feeling,she changed the facts to fit how she felt,I of course tried looking at the facts to understand her feelings,get it?

by Anonymousreply 22404/08/2013

Wow. I have recently come to realize that my BF has BPD. He refuses any treatment becauuse therapy "takes too long, he doesn't have the patience." As well as he can " control his own thoughts, doesn't need someone elses' brand of bullshit thinking, Cu's he won't believe them." Meanwhile, the man will admit his brain will make him think something vastly different from one day to the next? (Ie...his mind is untrustworthy.) I am *so fucked* I can't begin to fathom how to recover. I am 35 yrs old, have no job or career (my own issues, of course I got them!) And am almost seven months pregnant with his child. I have no family, no where to turn. I have always been used and manipulated in my life...but never like this. I never loved anyone like this. Lol! I finally fall in love and it turns out, it's with the *craziest* of craziest. And in my life, that's saying a lot. I$m so 'kin gullible, too honest, too caring...too lonely and desperate for the security of a die-for-you life-long love. He is someone I tried to date a couple of times over the years...at 17 and at 24...six months was the longest I invested back then. He was just..."odd" and stand-offish. I got the sense of his wanting to fill whatever he did with me but not being able to rely on him to return thefavor in any way. I am too co-dependent to be an endless supplier. You gotta nourish back. Anyway..ten years go by and he tracks me down out of the blue. Innocuous emails quickly turned into what is pure manipulation. Of course, stupid me, I didn't think anyone could or would make the things he says he feels up. And I'm vulnerable. Having gotten a small inheritance, I chose to get out of a 15 yr relationship from hell (constant rages, no love.) And see if I couldn't find something better for myself. It was a big risk but I knew I'd never be happy if I stayed with my ex. Sigh* So this guy, BPD guy, decides he can't live without me another day, leaves his wife of six years and their one year old daughters (who supposedly meant the world to him) and moves in with me. And we're madly happy and in love until a month goes by where he then packs up and leaves out of nowhere! Now...at first I bought the BS, he missed his kid (wife refused to allow her near me and he, of course, never challenges her). He would want to come back after a couple of weeks and I, fool that I am, was happy! I have never been in love. I never had anyone feed me, so consistantly, precisely what I needed to hear before. The man has a good job, but between his uncontrolled sense of entitlement (let's buy e expensive things to fill my empty soul) and his wife's complete shalliow self (she refuses to divorce him without ensuring he can not financially afford to move on with his life) *I* wound up using my money to support him, pay for his lawyer, etc... By the time I started to realize I can't ever trust him...he's not simply "confused" but crazy...my funds were very low and I was pregnant. Mind you, I was create, Shit, AM still, addicted to the man. The idea of this love I have, that he created! The man has left about 20 times in the past eight months. This last time he was gone almost a month. I, at 5 months pregnant, had a nervous breakdown. Was facing eviction and had to ask my psycho ragey ex to come and not leave me alone Cu's all I did was shake with anxiety. BPD didn't care.He teased me with promises of returning only to change his mind the next day. He did come back a couple weeks ago but...well, rent's due on Friday and he's been acting shady all week. "Tired," he says. :::SMH::: I've learner this is his code for, I'm putting distance between us so I can work on twisting my brain up so that I can hate you long enough you leave you again. Sigh* This board, I found last night....needless to say, when he's in the throws of BPD (or the manifested part I see as distance) I don't even sleep. The thing that hits me most is how the bottom line is quite clear: he is never going to be anything but this insane child. Part 1

by Anonymousreply 22504/24/2013

Part 2 Selfish beyond all comprehension, irrational in his wants, as not only are they inconsistant, they are veritably at odds with each other. Immune to anyone elses' *needs*, despite wanting to be able to endlessly go back to that well for another cup of your soul. You all say run. I wish I could. I wish I had any means to financially survive. And I'ma have a child! Whom, btw, he has provided *nothing* for!!! It helps, this tho ad....because now I truly know, my own brand of crazy isn't so bad. I *do* recognize, finally, the e depths of this man's depravity. His soul-sickness. It is hard, being a person who wants to heal others, to really accept that all that he does is so far out of my control...it has *nothing* to do with me. A more loving, supportive, intelligent and demonstrative person than me he can never, ever hope to find. And I'm sexy too! Lol! Just saying, if a real life relationship of love and understanding, forgiveness and support as well as the aptitude to present that mirror, to call him to answer to the realities *of his own making* were something he was after, then I wouldn't be so petrified right now of his leaving again. I have read a lot of "professional" opinions on BPD these past few days. None of that comes close to the real life understanding I've witnessed here in this thread. So, thank you. I apologize for my length and the many odd typos...I am using a Kindle and autocorrect is auto-wrong. I'll definitely return here, so if anyone wants mire details (and they are truly mind-bending to me...and sickening to all) or whatnot, ask away. Thanks.

by Anonymousreply 22604/24/2013

There are a lot of ignorant people on this board. Basing your understanding of an illness on a movie is like thinking you are an expert on the Civil War because you watched Gone With the Wind. Each person is unique and if they have an illness or disorder, that doesn't mean they are that illness. Both my father and I have BPD. He was abusive and out of control but pretended to be nice in public. I on the other hand almost never get angry and would say my defining characteristic is kindness. I was just diagnosed, but the literature seems to suggest remission of symptoms is possible in a year with intensive therapy. I think complaining about other people's illnesses as though you are a victim is a pathetic way to feel better of yourself. This condition makes a person feel miserable and you should be ashamed for attacking that other poster.

by Anonymousreply 22704/24/2013

One of my best friends is Borderline. I love her a lot, much more than a friend actually, and that has caused some trouble for us. Neither of us has boundaries. She told me I was her favorite person within a few weeks of becoming friends and it all got really intense from there. Im gay and shes straight, but she would flirt with me and we got very physically close and it confused the shit out of me. When she got a BF I freaked out. We have had like four arguments about all of this. She never dumps me though or gets angry with me about it, which boggles my mind as she often insult or complains about everyone else we know.

About a month ago she broke up with her BF and suddenly decided that she didnt wanna sleep next to me anymore or be close. I didnt understand why and this really upset me. Its taken a little time, but now she is getting close to me again- however with boundaries. I know I will always love her though. Dont know how to get over her...

by Anonymousreply 22804/25/2013

One clear red flag to when a person is borderline is if you go to visit a friend or loved one and the new squeeze insults them incessantly while sucking up to you. You're like, WTF, and wish your friend or loved one were not linked to this person. You might be tempted to think it's an abuser or a cheat, but if the relationship lasts, it's almost certainly a borderline.

by Anonymousreply 22904/28/2013

I never realized that so many people with BPD use the Datalounge. It really explains a lot.

by Anonymousreply 23004/28/2013

I hate r227. Glad their father hit them.

by Anonymousreply 23104/28/2013

Any negative comments about BPD are from ignorant people and should have remained un posted. I have BPD and am a psychologist. It is am extremely painful emotional roller coaster ride and takes contnuous strength to live manageably. I chose to become a Psychologist to help others with BPD since I have a greater source of empathy. Those around you often fail to realize your immense suffering.

by Anonymousreply 23205/04/2013

Even the title of this thread is classic BPD. So insufferable. For your own mental health, if you suspect a friend or partner has BPD... RUN!!!!!

by Anonymousreply 23305/04/2013

One of the prosecution witnesses who is a mental health professional said Jodi Arias had attributes consistent with borderline personality disorder and one other pathological condition.

by Anonymousreply 23405/04/2013

Borderlines should just kill themselves and stop all the whining!!!!

by Anonymousreply 23505/04/2013

"Those around you often fail to realize your immense suffering."

It's true, few people tune into how much pain the BPD is suffering, because they're so preoccupied with how much the BPD-er has made THEM suffer!

If you want sympathy, don't hurt other people.

by Anonymousreply 23605/04/2013

Maybe I'm a borderline...

by Anonymousreply 23705/04/2013

i'll give you borderline!

by Anonymousreply 23805/04/2013

To all of you insensitive bitches who are giving everyone with bpd a ignorant typical stereotype. Think about this you sure as hell ain't perfect but you want to sit and judge everyone with bpd as crazy. I'm have bpd and know how to control it. Several of mention how crazy your partner was... did u ever think they probably thought you were a pyscho? Your obviously heartless and ignorant.but maybe the.problem really in you so how about you learn how to whip your ass before you talk shot bitch

by Anonymousreply 23905/10/2013

Had a girlfriend with BPD. Horrible. Made everything about her. Saw slights where there were none. Always has it in for someone in the family and someone at work. You always wonder when your time will come to be in her "hot seat". She could never understand how her friends and coworkers could hold relationships with men of means. Her envy of these women who thought enough of themselves was so toxic. She never got why men would always go for her friends and not her. Her fragile ego always needed coddling. I watch her struggle for afar via her psycho Facebook page.

by Anonymousreply 24005/11/2013

I know BPDs who -think- they are very empathic, but half the time (or more) they make up the way another person feels, and are actually completely out-of-touch with that other person's emotions.

BPDs may feel deeply, and feel deeply about other people. That's not the same as empathy, though. You have to have more awareness of the other person. BPDs spend most of their time being too self-centered.

And when it comes to other people, also *way* too self-congratulatory.

by Anonymousreply 24105/14/2013

What does that even mean R241?

by Anonymousreply 24205/14/2013

Could one of the more knowledgeable people, if there are any still around, give some of the similarities between bipolar and borderline as well as differences.

by Anonymousreply 24305/15/2013

Saying "you all misunderstand..." to a bunch of strangers, most of whom haven't said anything, seems deeply disturbed and disturbing.

by Anonymousreply 24405/15/2013

Every time this thread pops back up to the front page and I see that opening paragraph of bullshit it just make me insane.

Don't try to talk you way out of this one, you manipulative little asshole.

by Anonymousreply 24505/15/2013

I agree with R245 - just give it a rest, BPD psychos. No one wants to listen to any more of your bullshit.

by Anonymousreply 24605/15/2013

BPD can also be of biological cause. As a parent of a teenage daughter who has just been diagnosed with "tendencies" towards BPD, I can tell you that she grew up with a very loving Mom. Now, her Dad, is another story. He was wonderful. Until the chaos got the best of him. EDUCATION, more EDUCATION and more again. We tried from the time she was very young to try to get "help". NO ONE listened! Started with lies. Lies to gain attention. Telling stories about her family that were far from the truth. Then the never telling the whole truth - just the part of the story that is necessary. As a parent? WOW. You seek advice, you try. You talk, talk, talk. (I did) It ended in divorce for her father and I. At 13, the roof keeps raising on our home. From the age of 10 on, she sleeps in my bed. We do EVERYTHING together. I do my very best to be her Dad and Mom. Things do not get better. At 13, she's sneaking out. Ends up having sex WAY too early. Then the temper... the anger... the violence. Sickness - belly aches. Needing to come home all the time from school only to get home and feel immediately better. I HAD NO IDEA what was going on. Take her to the Dr over and over only to be told nothing was wrong. Put her on the pill to "stabilize her moods". HA! That didn't work (of course not!). On to counselling for her and I. A full year of that! Not much help at all. The only thing it did was help me to think that I'm not crazy.. there really is an issue. GUILT, PAIN, CONFUSION... and even ANGER. Some of my issues. Door after door after door slammed in my face. FINALLY??????? I read enough about teen depression I think it's that. Take her to our NEW dr. He says he'll only give her meds IF she visits Mental Health. Email after email after phone call after phone call. Telling the worker what was going on. Each incident, faithfully, I called. FINALLY???? A screening. An answer. FINALLY. Her and I smile.... We will head down the road to recovery together. DBT first... not sure what's next. We have a different relationship now.

by Anonymousreply 24705/22/2013

All the negative garbage on here???? Educate yourselves. THEN, and only THEN should you waste "finger" time typing junk on here. Possibly there's a medical term for your kind too. Just because you don't understand something or someone does not give you the right to judge.

by Anonymousreply 24805/22/2013

Every time I see the title of this thread it pisses me off. I knew someone with BPD, and she always had to be telling everyone exactly how they had to "understand" something and exactly how they had to treat her. She (and her kids) always used her illness as a way to control others. "I'm SICK, so you have to do X and Y and X and every other thing I tell you to do." Guess what? I don't have to do what you tell me, or to "understand" the world exactly as you see it. I cut her and her family out of my life, and I'm far better for it.

by Anonymousreply 24905/22/2013

R247 this sounds a lot like my 20 year old son.... A truly bright, loving, delightful, loving child as a little boy.....then at age 7, 10, etc., I saw things that disturbed me. Excessive sensitivity & overreaction to "perceived. Rejection or insults." Very exaggerated responses to these things. Then lying over ridiculous things, manipulating & playing one parent against the other. His father, it was suggested to me by a therapist, was a narcissist.... Who let this boy do whatever he wanted, did not know how to say no or set rules, guidelines, boundaries. It was me- mean mom, against them. I felt like a third wheel! My then husband wanted to ( and STILL wants) to be his son's friend, not his father. I felt like I was on my own and going a little crazy. Talk about a total "mindfuck!" Yeah, that's exactly what it was, only I didn't know that term then & could only describe their combined interaction with me as totally "twisted," a pack of lies, contrived stories. Felt like I was really going crazy. My only child & 2 against one. Finally, we split. At 13, my son decides to go with dad & totally cut me out of the picture. Dad has more$$$$$, and dad has no rules, and if you get into any trouble or mess up, dad will lie like a rug for you and rescue you over and over again. I keep trying to maintain contact, I love my son!!! I try to instill in him what I felt he knew and understood as a young child... The difference between right & wrong..... Taking responsibility for your actions.....After 6 to 7 years of running wild, lying constantly, manipulating & using people, then becoming consumed with a frightening rage that comes & goes without warning, all kinds if accusations of me doing horrible things I KNOW I did not do ( and perpetuated by his father to this day) my ex has created a monster of sorts who WANTS to do the right thing, but can't seem to, who overreacts emotionally to everything, who's life is spinning out if control & races from one crisis to another... Who though is extremely gifted intellectually, can't get through a semester if college or hold a job more than a few weeks, can't tell the truth about the simplest thing...... So many secrets!!!!, Involved in one serious, intense relationship after another, possessive, jealous, blowing huge sums of $$$$, and now having some legal issues related to those toxic relationships...... This is how the ex dumps, and I do mean "dumps" him on my doorstep after "grooming" him to be the way he is today. And the ex moves away & washes his hands. There IS a gentle, hopeful, loving, hurting soul in that boy!!! I see it more and more. Don't tell me to run!!! I am his mother! There HAS to be a way out for him. There has to be help! He KNOWS he's not right. He knows. You experts out there..... Tell me what I can do, what we can do. Where can he REALLY get help for this? He's scared but he does trust me now. We're all scared. I used tobthinknthis was bipolar disorder, but it is so much more like BPD, and I think that latter ex scares me even more.

by Anonymousreply 25005/30/2013

I wonder if BPD is genetic.

I have a friend who I have known for 35 years. This thread has helped explain a great deal of the behavior I've witnessed and been subjected to over the years.

At a funeral gathering...I met one side of this friend's family...they all had stories about growing up with extreme BPD behavior.

Thank you all for the discussion.

by Anonymousreply 25105/31/2013

Every time this thread shows up with its "you all misunderstand," I feel resurgent hatred of the OP and his presumption.

by Anonymousreply 25205/31/2013

R241 nails it. I keep an eye on a former friend who is BPD and she is so predictable. Puts her cats before everyone including her husband who is now leaving her because he found a woman with real interests in life. She isn't wrapped up into herself and it is just such a welcomed relief for him.

by Anonymousreply 25305/31/2013

[quote] I keep an eye on a former friend who is BPD

She *is* BPD? Or she *has* BPD?

I see this so often when people have ADD, or some variation thereof, that they say they *are* the disease. I have a condition that has an acronym, but I never say I *am* the condition.

by Anonymousreply 25405/31/2013

No. She is the PD.

by Anonymousreply 25505/31/2013

Fricken sad that all I have to fall back on is this disorder and not a person. I'm probably the poster girl for this disorder. There was a time I was diagnosed with it and I didn't know what my medication nurse was thinking cause I didn't know anything about the disorder. I think the disorder is more like a outside physical handicap that others see and judge but only the sufferer knows how it feels to be handicapped. I grew up with very insensitive people in my family. It really hurt that my brother and sister would always tease me. Then when I would go to school classmates teased me for being poor. Don't people know that you will spend the rest of your life being a child if you are not given a happy childhood.

by Anonymousreply 25606/18/2013

Wow, this thread is filled with real drips and downers.

by Anonymousreply 25706/18/2013

What percentage of the American population is believed to have BDP?

by Anonymousreply 25806/23/2013

Yeah...just like the BPD guy I was dating for awhile "empathized" with me by fucking other guys and girls while we were together,took money from me claiming he was broke(when actually he had thousands of dollars in a bank account he tried to keep hidden), made fun of mentally and physically disabled gay guys and never hesitated ONCE to exploit,manipulate,use and abuse the people around him who tried to be his friend.

by Anonymousreply 25906/23/2013

words fail me at some of these posts, the ignorance of people's beliefs surrounding bpd as an illness are just as misunderstood as schizophrenia, everyone is an individual, yes there are some nasty and manipulative people with a bpd diagnosis out there but there are also nasty and manipulative people who are diabetic or asthmatic etc. the majority of individuals should not be judged by the actions of a minority, get some mental health education before you write such stigmatizing dribble.

by Anonymousreply 26006/29/2013

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by Anonymousreply 26107/06/2013

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by Anonymousreply 26207/07/2013

Libertarians with borderline personality disorder believe in spellcasters?

by Anonymousreply 26307/07/2013

Hello, Im hoping for some advice from someone who has either been in a relationship with someone suffering from BPD or who suffers themselves from it. My life has recently been ripped to pieces by this disorder. And before you "say run like hell" I did. Many, many years ago this girl tore me to shreds and did some pretty bad shit to me. I had no idea anything was wrong with her then or now for that fact. Anyway, she moved long ago but we stayed friends and every time someone would tell her the no good things I was up to I would get an hour long lecture when I saw her. We were in love long ago (I thought). She built the walls that now protect me from being hurt ever again (so I thought). As a matter of fact I haven't been afraid of much in my lifetime...except her! For years I would disappear shortly after these lectures in fear of what would happen next? Well, I just got sick of looking for the right girl and have always known she was right in front of me the while time. Recently following yet another lecture I had my hand on the door to leave and somehow heard "I need a ride" coming from far behind me. I stopped. That's where my life ended. We went out for the next two nights and against her wishes I dropped her off both nights with nothing more than a kiss. She called as soon as she landed from her flight back to her "now" home state and started crying and saying all those things I needed to hear. I pleaded with her not to put me in the dark place she put me before because I couldn't live through it again and she promised me she wasn't that girl anymore. I always knew I would end my life with her. Every time I'd see her she would tell me about something she had kept for all these years and how I was her first intimate relationship. Now, I know this girl (so I thought) better than anyone in this world and soon realized something was fucked! To get to the point without going into to many details. I flew down to see her and spent the best week of my life....and I have had some great weeks! And she did have EVERYTHING I had ever gave her. As soon as I returned home she hated me. She said to give her a few days and I'm thinking WTF? After many hours on the internet looking for some kind of answer being as impatient as I am. I know she had some bad things happen to her but she has overcome them (so I thought). She is the smartest girl I know with a good education and also has a very good job that she has been at for a long time. After stumbling on a few articles that described my 10 days with her almost perfectly I yelled out what I thought was wrong with her. I said that this wasn't her and I wanted her back. I will regret this for the rest of my life! She said she was sorry and meant to tell me and after a short argument hung up the phone and has never talked to me again. She changed her numbers and even called a mutual friend and said some bad things about me. Oh ya, and if the ring wasn't sent down to the wrong store....I would be married to her right now. Stupid or not that's how sure I was of her and I mean no one knows or suspects what's wrong with her. A lot of things add up now especially why a gorgeous girl like that's not married yet? But hell, I wasn't either! And if she didn't admit it to me I still wouldn't know what the hell happened. She did tell me she was seeing a phyc for PTSD but that wasn't no PTSD! I haven't said a fraction of the things that happened but they all added up in the end. OK, first she isn't a girl I just met. She is the most precious thing in this world to me. I value her friend ship more than anything else and can not go the rest of my life with her hating me. SO RUNNING IS NOT AN OPTION. Can someone tell me how to go about just getting her to talk to me again? I know I went about this whole thing wrong but she knew I wanted to say something and kept coming up with excuses to get off the phone, she must have know I was close. I let it go for 4 months now and more than anything I'm worried about her. I wish we just stayed friends. Thanx

by Anonymousreply 26407/08/2013

"I value her friend ship more than anything else and can not go the rest of my life with her hating me."

Don't worry, she won't hate you for long, soon she'll hate her next ex the way she hates you now, and won't care about you at all.

Run away from her and don't look back, you idiot!

by Anonymousreply 26507/08/2013

I see a lot of bpds in fandoms, especially the obsessed ones. Just take a look at tumblr and twitter and see what I am talking about. People are seriously fucked up out there. Obsessions with actors and TV shows. People posting how this one particular celebrity saved their lives.

I see pics of cutting and what not.

I noticed one girl was just furious over how another was talking shit about her, sending her hate mail. She then made suicide threats.

by Anonymousreply 26607/08/2013

Then, there are the jealousy posts about actors who are dating, ripping apart the S/Os.

by Anonymousreply 26707/08/2013

People with an avoidant personality disorder often suffer a lot more than those with BPD. Unlike borderliners they have no friends, never had a relationship, and are un-or underemployed.

Borderliners often have outgoing personalities, to the point of being outright attention seekers, they can be assertive and they usually have lots of friends and a partner who can assist them in their therapy.

Avoidants, on the other hand, hide away, suffer in silence and because of their timid nature they end up as victims of bullying in their neighbourhood or workplace.

by Anonymousreply 26807/08/2013

Every time I see the title of this thread, I get ticked off at the presumption of the OP.

by Anonymousreply 26907/09/2013

A lot of BPD's are like a lot of Muslims...

ALWAYS playing the victim.

by Anonymousreply 27007/10/2013

I feel sorry for all. Of you that have wished ill or angry desires for ppl with BPD, if ur. Ex,s had a cardiac condition that was chronic with angina, and u had to wake in the early mornings. To take them to the. ER, would u wish them dead,because u were sleep deprived and needed. Some peace for urself? When will the stigma of mental illness be gone? There is no difference, you have no idea how much pain the BPD victim, yes victim. Goes thru mentally, I think. Umay TRULY have no control, they want it desperately,and feel such remorse, but u can't unring a bell, have u forgotten the endure trauma, not only as a child, when they can not help themselves? And that they have trama thru out their formative years, they did nothing to receive this disorder, except be a cnhild in a home where there was was no love or concern for them. My sister is a victim, and she is beautiful inside and out, its so sad. That they empathy they have can not be returned. By. So called. NORMAL PPL. may God bless u all, and yes I know this is not gramatically correct

by Anonymousreply 27107/20/2013

I need to correct. That. They have. NO. Control over their actions and suffer great remorse, I am a psychiatrist, and I have had a huge amount of anger. Spewed at me, but regardless, I am just a human, and can not fathom the the ill will I have read here. Instead of spewing ur own. Venom and praying or reading and try to have some minor comprehension of the victim , u behave cowardly in ur anonyomity on the internet, the very ppl. U r wishing ill. Will. Upon, cry genuine tears for u that are trying to cause them harm, so. Who is really. The bad person? Ask. Urselves. And if any of u would like to comment to me. Ask. For. My. Email, I will assist u, in that, so u may hurl ur venom at me on posts and personally, I didn't read this but scanned it quickly, and the only person, I am sure was being. Genuine. Was. Sonya, stay strong. And. God bless

by Anonymousreply 27207/20/2013

You answering in that vein and are in the field. NOW. That's. Scary. I hope u meant in a literal. Field. Now the medical. One, God bless u and the veggies. U must. Be growing, if u would like to debate or have a discussion of MY Specialty, I think I would enjoy that immensely

by Anonymousreply 27307/21/2013

I have never read anything more. On the spot. Thank. U, and to the mother, god bless. U, its very. Hared to parent, but. Ur love and thee stress. U have, will someday be replaced. With. Thanks and glory from our father in heaven, she is a very lucky daughter

by Anonymousreply 27407/21/2013

To 201. I am a psychiatrist. Not a computer. Geek, no I never said. Empathy was a marker. For BPD, simply usiong. An andecdote of one form to to express. That. One would not wish ill to a personl, if the disorder was not hurting them, trying for some open understanding for these patients. But. For a person " in the field". To have such a limited closemindedness is frigthening, and should not be expressed in a forum for that topic , I am new here. So I don't k now the protocol to speak to the one that left the msg. Niw for the person that said she was from a stable home. It only takes a few minutes to traumatize a childs persona, and they can not be watched all the time. , b ut that componet is thnere for the victim whther seen or. Not. All I was saying. Was more understanding of the illness can reduce the severity, the person is ill not evil, and the caregiver or. SO needs to educate themselves to for. Better union, that is free of the b ehavior. It can be done, but medical help must be sought, now for the homosexual that caloled me a cunt, that's the first and last time I use that filth I will pray for u, please get ur doctorate. Before u harm othners. U do know. " first do no harm". I do not think u ha e the b ehavior control for this profession, and I do not let en ept cowards. Offen d or disturb. Me I am in control, u should pratice. That. Often

by Anonymousreply 27507/21/2013

The "Beth Anderson" posts are why I don't go to shrinks.

by Anonymousreply 27607/21/2013

A psychiatrist who can't spell "you"?

Sure.

by Anonymousreply 27707/21/2013

Yeah, R277. Or her own name the same way twice?

by Anonymousreply 27807/22/2013

Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much. in this kind of situation where one loses his/her soul mate there are several dangers engage in it. one may no longer be able to do the things he was doing before then success will be very scarce and happiness will be rare. that person was created to be with you for without him things may fall apart. That was my experience late last month. but thank god today i am happy with him again. all thanks to DR Paul, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how DR Paul could cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email: altimatespelltemple@gmail.com. words are not be enough to express what he has done for me. i have promised to share the good news as long as i live........cyan

by Anonymousreply 27907/26/2013

jump...do it!!!.... r279.

by Anonymousreply 28007/26/2013

[quote]Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose . . .

oh, dear

by Anonymousreply 28107/26/2013

Jesus fucking christ.

The fake "psychiatrist" and "lovespell casters" followed hot on the heels of the whining "my darling spawn has BPD and you all are SO MEAN" cunts.

Please, for the love of god, die in a grease fire.

If dying in a grease fire isn't your thing, just leave. Go back to the "Fat Women With BPD Kids" discussion boards and/or the "Fat Women Seeking Lovespell Casting" discussion boards.

Thank you.

by Anonymousreply 28207/26/2013

First, will you goddamned morons please learn how to paragraph before you post? You may have written something interesting, I will never know. I am not slogging through all that single-spaced, un-paragraphed crap.

Hit the return key TWICE and it makes a paragraph break. It works every single time and it's not rocket science.

Now then, let's have a look-see at the lovely and talented R248:

[quote]All the negative garbage on here????

Oh, you mean people posting their actual experiences with selfish, vicious, manipulative, lying, cheating, raging BPD's?

[quote]Educate yourselves.

Regrettably, we've had an education. Those who have been unlucky and/or unwise have had that excruciatingly painful education on a daily basis for years.

[quote]THEN, and only THEN should you waste "finger" time typing junk on here.

See above, then take your "finger" time and shove it up your smug, ill-informed ass.

[quote]Possibly there's a medical term for your kind too.

Yes, it's called PTSD. We acquired it while coping with the relentlessly abusive behavior of paranoid, vindictive, psycho BPD cunts.

[quote]Just because you don't understand something or someone

Oh, but we do understand it, Blanche, we really, really do. We actually deal with it from a perspective you will never understand or know. While you're busily raging, blaming and projecting, we're on the receiving end of your pointless, crazy, exhausting, destructive behavior.

You BPD people think that everyone's somehow obliged to tolerate your shit. We aren't and you have no idea what you put decent people through with your hateful insanity. Of course, it would only matter if you actually cared about other people, which you don't.

[quote]does not give you the right to judge.

See above, we actually DO have that right. We are judging you and we will continue to judge you. Don't like it? Feel free to fuck off.

by Anonymousreply 28307/26/2013

Yes to what R283 said.

by Anonymousreply 28407/26/2013

don't bother with crazy people in real life. period. and there are MANY on here, the internet...feel free to fuck with them.

by Anonymousreply 28507/26/2013

Hello my Name is mrs Suzan i just want to share my experience and testimony here.. i was married for 6 years to my husband and all of a sudden, another woman came into the picture.. he started hailing me and he was abusive..but i still loved him with all my heart and wanted him at all cost…then he filed for divorce..my whole life was turning apart and i didn't know what to do..he moved out of the house and abandoned the kids.. so someone told me about trying spiritual means to get my husband back and introduced me to a spell caster called Dr Jagem of Supremacytemple so i decided to try it reluctantly..although i didn't believe in all those things… then he told me what to do and I do it he told me not to worry that my husband will come back in 3 days when he did the special prayers and spell, after 4 days, my husband came back and was pleading..he had realized his mistakes..i just couldn't believe it.. anyways we are back together now and we are happy..in case anyone needs this man, his email address supremacypower@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 28607/27/2013

Mine is a difficult situation, at best. In serious, deep love with a man who is married and I am married as well. Both of us in unhappy marriages, found eachother by accident, but the attration was so intense, so deep, it developed into love. As he has so much more to loose than me, being a woman, the obstacles were too great for him to jump over, so we both decided it was best to stop our relationship beifre it became a mess. Heartbroken, I went to Dr.ZACK BALO for help. I cannot live without the touch, voice or heart of this man with me. I’ve been miserable without him. I asked Dr.ZACK BALO to help me and the day he cast the spell, I ran into him in the street. After months of being apart, we never talked about our romance, we only talked business. (We have a business realtionship we have to deal with) He acted like a schoolboy in love and even kissed me on the lips in public!! I nearly died. I called him on the cell phone a few minutes later and he all of a sudden he starts telling me that he misses me, he cant resist me and he wants to see me. The spell. It’s not that he didnt love me before, but we decided not to take our relationship further and stuck to it. He stuck to it harder than I did!! For 3 months I couldnt get him to come back to me without worry and now I didnt even get my talisman yet and he’s talking like this, a way in which he didnt for a long time after we broke up. I gave him bait but he never took it until now. I know it’s the spell. Dr.ZACK BALO is amazing. We spoke again a day later and he was again, very romantic and talking to me as if we never broke up again. I love this person so much, it’s painful. I want us to be in love and worry free and Dr.ZACK BALO will make it happen. I will re-post when I get my final results. You are safe with Dr.ZACK BALO. I feel so comforted by this guestbook and just by my own experiences. Thank You Dr.ZACK BALO, Thank you email to contact him is wiseindividualspell@gmail.com.

by Anonymousreply 28707/29/2013

THE GREAT POWERFUL SPELL CASTER THAT BRING BACK MY EX BOYFRIEND. I just want to say thank you prophet ahmed for all you have done for me. He is back now. That very powerful spell caster STOP THE DIVORCE – and get my ex boyfriend back. My name is Joy Philip, from Canada. I never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once when i went for a business summit early this year. I meant a man who's name is PROPHET AHMED he is really powerful and could help cast spells to bring back one's gone, lost, misbehaving lover and magic money spell or spell for a good job or luck spell .I’m now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 3 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down because our relationship has been on for 3years. I really loved him, but his mother was against us and he had no good paying job. So when i met this spell caster,i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him. At first i was undecided, skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try.And in 7 days when i returned to Canada, my boyfriend(now husband) called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mother and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married. I didn't believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do. Well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid, and my husband also got the new job and our lives became much better.in case you are in any situation you can contact prophet ahmed at his email solutiontemple399@gmail.com or his personal cell +2347053375151 Thank you for all your help prophet i promise to share this Testimony to every body in the world wide.

by Anonymousreply 28808/01/2013

Hello everyone, am Alexia from U S A. I just wanna to share my experience and testimony about my relationship and how it was restored through a spell caster called dr obas. My ex left me suddenly for one witch street girl without any reason and i tried all possible means within my reach to get him back but doesn't work out after which a very good friend of mine introduce me to this spell caster. When i explained everything to this man, he requested for some personal details of me and my ex with our pictures. Then this man told me that within 24hrs starting from the time he collected the details my ex will find me and to my greatest surprise before the time this spell caster told me my ex came back to me. To the glory of dr obas me and my ex are now living happily. In case anyone needs his help contact him through his email;obasspiritualtemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 28908/02/2013

was the song "Borderline" by Madonna about her being borderline?

by Anonymousreply 29008/06/2013

I don't know, you should ask the spell casters.

by Anonymousreply 29108/07/2013

I am so happy to let the whole word know how this powerful spell caster saved my marriage. Everything was going down the drain as my husband can not stop cheating on me with other women. It became used to always heating on me. I tried to make him stop, but I couldn’t help the situation, the more I tried, the harder it becomes. At times we will fight and go apart for some months and we will come back again just because of our kids. One day a friend told me about this spell caster who helped her too, his name is Dr.Dova Saga, she said he uses white magic spells to solve spiritual problems. I decided to give it a try, I contacted him and he told me it will take just 2 to 3 days and I will see great changes in my husband. He actually cast a spell, believe me after 2 to 3 days of the spell, my husband was confessing different names of woman he has slept with. He begged for forgiveness and never to try it again. From that day till now, my mind is at rest. My husband dislike every other women on earth except me. And am so happy to have him for myself alone. The spell caster’s contact is dovasagawhitemagictemple@yahoo.com **or his website is: www.dovasagawhitemagictemple.webs.com. You can contact him for any help, he is very powerful and kind.

by Anonymousreply 29208/07/2013

After all this time, the OP's misuse of the word "inverse" was the first clue that the putz simply was trying to explain away her diagnosis.

by Anonymousreply 29308/07/2013

Hi everyone i will never forget the help the priest of JAYEMA temple render to me in my marital life. i have been married for 4 years now and my husband and i love each other very dearly . after 3 years of our marriage my husband suddenly change he was having an affair with a lady outside,i notice it then i was praying for divine intervention the thing became more serious i told my pastor about it we prayed but nothing happen. my husband just came home one day he pick up his things and left me and the kids to his mistress outside at this time i was confuse not knowing what to do again because i have lost my husband and my marriage too. i was just checking my mails in the office when i saw someone sharing her testimony on how the priest of JAYEMA temple help her out with her marital problems so i contacted the email of priest JAYEMA i told him my problem and i was told to be calm that i have come to the right place that i should fill some information concerning my self i did after 30 minus he called me again congratulating me that my problems will be solve within 48 hours. he told me what went wrong with my husband and how it happen.that they will restored my marriage but i will make a free donation to their JAYEMA home anything my heart told me. to my greatest surprise my husband came to my office begging me on his knees that i should find a place in my heart to forgive him i quickly ask him up that i have forgiven him.friends your case is not too hard why don't you give priest JAYEMA a try they work surprises because i know they will also bring back your husband. contact him via jayemamagictemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 29408/09/2013

Thanks to this great man of spirit called Dr Samura which I don't know how to thank him for the good work he has Don for me and family which I want to share my testimony with to you all so I was married to Hassan Moel and my name is Julie deshields for six years now he left me with two kids with know reason which I don't know what to do so one day i was in my friends place when I exposed my pain to her about my depression which I have be looking for who to help me out of it then my friend called me closer to her self telling me on how she got this great man of spirit who helped her found her way to get her husband back then I ask of his contact she quickly go and get her computer and gave me his Email ID and his number so,that is how I contacted him for a help. And now am so happy with my family and with a happy home if you are in such pain kindly Via Email SAMURATELLERSPEL100@YAHOO.COM or call +2347030410643 have faith in him and he will help you Julie Deshield

by Anonymousreply 29508/09/2013

r283, should get the post of the year award. Right on target.

by Anonymousreply 29608/09/2013

The good news is BPD actually starts to wane in your 40s. It's not lifelong like the other personality diorders. If you're afflicted, just hang in there and try to catch yourself. Read the symptoms and then beat them. Recognize them and you'll hasten the healing in your mid thirties. Only you can do this as therapists usually avoid the BPD because at some point, the therapist is going to go from loved to hated. They can't see the grey shades in people. Just black and white.

SNAP YOURSELF OUT OF IT!

Oh and BTW, mostly every teenager suffers with this illness at some time in their lives.

by Anonymousreply 29708/09/2013

My mother is a diagnosed narcissist and it's been interesting to compare her to the things people say about being victims of people with BPD here.

I've always felt like narcissism was to Asperger's as BPD was to full-blown autism - on the same spectrum and both presenting their own challenges, but one was much less debilitating than the other.

In other words, my mother is a selfish, melodramatic complete asshole, but in talking to friends with BPD parents, I know she could've been a lot worse.

by Anonymousreply 29808/09/2013

I' found a FB page and pinterest of a diagnosed borderline personality disordered frau type. Scroll down on the left to the pinterest. Unfortunately, she's turning to the born again church when she should be working on a program with a psychiatrist and compassionate counselor. Feel bad for this poor soul but she might just grow out of it as she nears forty.

by Anonymousreply 29908/09/2013

Is that another difference between narcissism and BPD? I don't think narcissists ever grow out of it.

by Anonymousreply 30008/09/2013

I had a friend who was full-on sociopath (he even asked me to help him kill someone once, just "to see what it was like"), and a friend who had BPD. I'm a healthy enough person to know that ending both of those sick friendships was a good idea, but uncomfortable that I drew people like that to me in the first place. Honestly, I sometimes miss the sociopath's friendship because he was both calm and creative, and seemed to be good at everything. Also, he read people so well it was almost like a parlor trick. The BPD friend was creative too, but so completely melodramatic that she wore me out. She lost friends all the time, and would then try to blame them for her own offensive and inappropriate behavior towards them. I stuck it out for longer than I should have because I felt sorry for her. I don't miss her at all.

by Anonymousreply 30108/09/2013

hello everyone in this blog, i want to extend my thanks to Dr Oko solutionhome@outlook.com the great spell caster that help me get my ex back back after i have be scam by two spell caster who claims they are real and genuine, i contacted this great spell caster at the point of losing hope that i can not get my man back again, i did exactly what this man ask me to do and to my greatest surprise everything happen the way this great spell caster told me that it will happen. my man who have not called me for the past three weeks just called me after Dr Oko cast his spell on him, and i really surprise that there are still great spell caster like Dr Oko who is so powerful. i am really happy today seeing my man back to me and even loving me more than ever before i meet him. i will not forgive myself if i leaves this blog without dropping the email address of this great spell caster for those of you that might need his help to contact him. so here is the email address of this great spell caster: solutionhome@outlook.com contact him now and all your problems will be gone forever Sonia

by Anonymousreply 30208/15/2013

I am Sandy from UK, i want to share a testimony of my life to every one. My Husband abandon me and kids. We have been together for 13 yrs married almost 10 yrs and we have 2 children age 10 and 6. My hubby has worked traveling for 2 yrs & this is the 1st time he has been alone. After he left for this job in Pa. and was coming back to get us in 2 wks for the summer but before that came he called me & was evil & mean & told me he wanted a divorce. It's been 2 months now and I know the devil is in this but he had cut any contact with me, even cleared our acct & mails me "child support". I found that he has a girl living with him along with her child yet he abandoned us. My mother had a terrible heart attack 2 wks ago and we almost lost her, I have lost 40 lbs, our 10 yr old has bald spots and the doctors all said these were from stress. I've tried so hard to talk to him but nothing helps and only makes it worse. I was really devastated so I confided in a friend of mine who now introduce me to Dr Jonally email: kayakoyavodosolutiontemple@gmail.com who now help to cast a spell that brought back my man. Friends I must tell you the truth kayakoyavodosolutiontemple@gmail.com is a very reliable spell caster.

by Anonymousreply 30308/21/2013

Schema Therapy: At Last, Effective Treatment for Borderline Personality Disorder

by Anonymousreply 30408/30/2013

My name is jennifer from Australia, i have little words to say about a spell caster in ( babaka.wolf@gmail.com) that stop the divorce of me and my husband. myself and my husband have been married for 14 years, and we have never had misunderstanding that would last for a week, but just last month here, my husband started acting weird and disrespectful, he do come home late and drink and smoke. he no longer have time for me and our kids, he was really becoming frustrating staying with a man who no-longer care if his family has eaten or not. And when i took a close look, i found out that he was seeing another lady outside our marriage. i acted as if i dont know, my husband was so stupid enough that he started bringing her home and when they come, they stay at the other side of the house. I was wondering because i know my husband can never be that foolish to bring a woman to our home. I will cry day and night, and all time regretting ever getting married to such an sweetheart who later turn out to be an idiot. One faithful morning i was just checking the internet when i saw so many good talks about this spell caster whose email address is ( babaka.wolf@gmail.com)i decide to try and see if there can be solution to my problem. I spoke to the spell caster over the phone and told him my troubles and he said he is going to check what the problem first before the casting of the spell. And few hours later he called me and he told me that there is a woman who has blindfolded my husband and even now, my husband is planing for a divorce. And this i never knew. And when i went to see our lawyer he said its true that my husband is discussing about our divorce. This made me cry more and angered me that i could not take it any more and when i confronted my husband, my husband said he is tired of the married and he want out. I felt like i was been drowned, and i asked the spell caster to save my marriage before its too late but the spell caster told me that firstly he will cast a spell to separate my husband and the other lady, and cast another spell that will reunite me and my husband together again as one. And he said this is going to take 3 days before i see results and at exactly the actual time and date, i saw my husband crying at the bedroom running to me kneeling apologizing for how stupid he has been for hurting me and the kids and he promise never to offend me or the kids ever again. everything looks as if its a movie and later on, my husband would call me at every seconds to ask were i was, even when he is in the office, he would want to know if am fine, Thank you Dr Moko for your great help.

by Anonymousreply 30508/31/2013

My name is Mr Frank Leo,I live in Germany,and I’m happily married with a lovely wife and three children. I had a very big problem with my wife few months ago,to the extent that she even packed her things away from me and my kids for almost 7months,and I tried all my possible best and effort to bring her back,but all to no avail.I discussed it with a very good friend of mine,and he gave me an advice concerning a spell caster,and I quote.“There’s someone who can handle your situation,he’s always ready and able to do anything related to spell casting,I will like you to contact him with his email,which is as follows.”Dr Jagem of SUPREMACYTEMPLE”. I never believed in spell casting,but he convinced me and I had no choice than to follow his advice,because I never dream of loosing my lovely wife.And that’s how I contacted him with his email address,and I discussed with him and so surprisingly,he told me that I’ll get my wife back a day after.so I never believed,until when things start happening, 3 days time,my wife called me to inform me that she was coming back…..So amazing!! That was how I got my wife back through spell casting and our relationship was now stronger than how it was before.One of the price I was asked to pay was to tell it to people around me that problems like this,can always be solved by “Dr Jagem of SUPREMACYTEMPLE”. So! my advice for you out there is to visit this same man,and tell him your problems too,if you are in any condition related to love issue or getting your ex back,to have a happy family,lottery spell,instant promotion etc.THANKS.... HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS supremacypower@gmail.com.. CONTACT HIM TODAY VIA THIS EMAIL ADDRESS: supremacypower@gmail.com AS HIS POWERS ARE SO STRONG AND VERY EFFECTIVE AND HAS NO BAD EFFECT INSTEAD IT HAVE A VERY GOOD RESULT AFTER CASTING THE SPELL.

by Anonymousreply 30609/04/2013

How TO BRING BACK YOUR EX I read a testimony online about Dr Love spell caster solution job well done ,drlovespellcastersolution@yahoo.com drlovespellcastersolution@gmail.com tel: +2348038096203 many ladies and gentlemen they are sharing their Love story on how Dr Love helped them get an ex-husband or ex-wife come back to their life back again between 48hrs then i decide to give Dr Love a try about my ex husband Raymond because My husband recently divorced me and states he fell out of love with me because he is now "dating" other young girls but ever since we divorced i find out i still love my ex-husband very much and my heart aches every single day . at first i don't believe i could ever get Raymond back and remarried again but Dr Love make my dream come true and you are my hero because you make me smile and happy again .Thanks so much Dr Love Name : Cherie

by Anonymousreply 30709/07/2013

Hello my name is Sarah Johnson i know renowned spell caster who helped me when i had problem with my Husband if you need a right place to solve your problems contact kpotikispelltemple@gmail.com is the right choice. he is a great man that have been casting spells with years of experience. he cast spells for different purposes like (1) If you want your ex back. (2) if you always have bad dreams. (3) You want to be promoted in your office. (4) You want women/men to run after you. (5) If you want a child. (6) You want to be rich. (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever. (8) If you need financial assistance. (9) Herbal care (10)If you want to win lottery Contact him today on: kpotikispelltemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 30809/14/2013

Who are these freaks posting about spell casting? Is this a joke?

by Anonymousreply 30909/14/2013

I was raised by an undiagnosed BPD. I am positive my mom had it and now that she's gone, I am able to deal with and process it more.

There isn't a person who knew her who didn't think something was "off" or "wrong". Irrational reactions to every day nuances, angry outbursts that included throwing things that could really hurt someone, going OFF on a defenseless server who didn't get the order right, slapping a man at a gathering who said Madonna was hot (very, very true story - she was easily angered by men's attraction to other women for some reason).

It has only been recently that I understood that I was the person in her life who she clung to - my dad was that person for over 20 years until they divorced and then it was me. She was very deft at manipulating me to stay with her, even after she disowned me twice for making decisions she viewed as black/white: if you talk to your dad, you're against me. Goodbye.

It was torture being disowned.

I'm envious of the people here who had the strength to walk away and cut off ties. I never could and I seem to have her patten of behavior on my mind a lot so as to make sure I don't repeat it.

I don't think I have it but a lifelong battle with depression came with the role of enabler.

I just felt so guilty leaving her alone in the world. The bad times were bad (emotionally, she never yelled or hit) but when those shining flickers of love, openness or acceptance came around, I relished them.

I know it sounds terribly pathetic and I feel pathetic writing it. But she's gone now and while I miss her, it is a tremendous relief to be free from it.

For the first year after her death, I didn't know how to live without her stern and judgement, it just had always been there since I can remember being alive.

by Anonymousreply 31009/15/2013

R310 I'm sorry for what you went through and wish you well.

What is up with the spellcaster crap?! God I hate the Internet sometimes.

by Anonymousreply 31109/15/2013

Is BPD always related to childhood sexual abuse? I remember reading that in the 90s, but is thar still considered true?

A family friend's 18 year old daughter was recently given this diagnosis. She has always been volatile, hypersensitive, weirdly monomaniacal - as in, dominating conversations,only wanting to talk about her musical obsessions and not listening to others at all. Very angry and tearful. Not just as an adolescent, but even when a young child.

She loathes her father, our family friend. I know him to be a major pot head and self absorbed. But sometimes I wonder if he abused her.

by Anonymousreply 31209/15/2013

I bumped this so out DL BPD's could investigate Schema Therapy, but somebody is way too committed to spellcaster stuff.

by Anonymousreply 31309/15/2013

I'm not sure about abuse but I always suspected something had happened to her.

This was half-confirmed recently by a family member, who had been disowned years ago, said "it wasn't her fault".

I don't want to know what happened to her, honestly. It doesn't change the outcome of her life and doesn't change those she was close to. Every single relationship in her life was complicated and difficult. There were a few people who escaped her wrath (and I was always curious why they did avoid it - after reading here, I suspect it's because they provided something she needed to continue to function as she did). Many of those who escaped the wrath do bring up stories about a time that her behavior shocked them even though it wasn't directed at them.

I also wouldn't be surprised if she was just damaged with no history of abuse there. It's a really strange disease.

by Anonymousreply 31409/15/2013

I know someone who has this disorder and she's working her divorce through life quotes on Pinterest and joined a born again Christian church. Her FB publicly gives intimate details about her husband dumping her for someone more stable with hobbies and interests. Why she can't see that she's humiliating herself while trying to spite her ex is just giving her former friends that "schadenfrueden" feeling and collecting on bets? She avoided a hospital stay THIS time but all bets are still on that she'll end up there after a faux suicide attempt or something. She weirdly goes from conceit to self loathing within mere minutes. Whenever I come down on myself, I think of this one and feel suddenly fortunate and blessed. BPD, what a bitch...

by Anonymousreply 31509/16/2013

Hello My name is Paul Wayne from England, I am 32 years old and I sincerely want to thank a great spell caster called Dr Alao who helped me to bring back my wife after she had left me and my kids for good two years and six months. through out that year and six months I and my two kids called kate and wilson were in great suffering until one day I came in contact with this powerful great spell caster who decided to wipe out tears away from eyes. According to my problem He decided to perform a spell service immediately and all other necessary things that has to be done an after the spell had been done He told me to wait for just 40 hours that the spell will start to take effect and so I believed and I waited for the time he had said. To my surprise, exactly the 40 hours that he had said I received a call and when I picked the call it was my wife pleading and also asking for forgiveness, at first I was amazed but later I came back to my mood and I decided to hang on the phone on her but when I terminated the call she keep on calling an I decided to switch off the phone. To my greatest surprise around 6:30am in the morning I heard my door bell ringing and I decided to open the door , to my surprise I saw my wife kneeling and begging me to forgive so I decided to forgive her and I ordered her up an I embrace her. This was how I got my wife back with the help of the great Dr Alao. viewers willing to contact him or anyone with the same problem or any kind of problem should simply contact him on this email ( Allpowersspiritualhome1@gmail.com) contact him at anytime and he is ready to help>>>>> HE IS A MAN TO BE TRUSTED>>>> once again THANK YOU THE GREAT DR ALAO.

by Anonymousreply 31609/23/2013

Is there a correlation between BPD and BDF?

by Anonymousreply 31709/23/2013

Wastebasket diagnosis. Anyone who's overly emotional gets slapped with the BPD label.

by Anonymousreply 31809/23/2013

Hello My name is paul wayne from England, I am 32 years old and I sincerely want to thank a great spell caster called Dr Alao who helped me to bring back my wife after she had left me and my kids for good two years and six months. through out that year and six months I and my two kids called kate and wilson were in great suffering until one day I came in contact with this powerful great spell caster who decided to wipe out tears away from eyes. According to my problem He decided to perform a spell service immediately and all other necessary things that has to be done an after the spell had been done He told me to wait for just 40 hours that the spell will start to take effect and so I believed and I waited for the time he had said. To my greatest surprise, exactly the 40 hours that he had said I received a call and when I picked the call it was my wife pleading and also asking for forgiveness, at first I was amazed but later I came back to my mood and I decided to hang on the phone on her but when I terminated the call she keep on calling an I decided to switch off the phone. To my greatest surprise around 6:30am in the morning I heard my door bell ringing and I decided to open the door , to my surprise I saw my wife kneeling and begging me to forgive so I decided to forgive her and I ordered her up an I embrace her. This was how I got my wife back with the help of the great Dr Alao. viewers willing to contact him or anyone with the same problem or any kind of problem should simply contact him on this email ( Allpowersspiritualhome1@gmail.com) contact him at anytime and he is ready to help>>>>> HE IS A MAN TO BE TRUSTED>>>> once again THANK YOU THE GREAT DR ALAO.

by Anonymousreply 31909/25/2013

We need something to diagnose the workplace fraus that goad us into fights with their anger only to start crying and make it seem like the fight is our fault, like we beat them or something.

by Anonymousreply 32009/25/2013

Stick to Freud

by Anonymousreply 32109/25/2013

Egad, I hate OP -- enough to find myself saying things like "egad."

The presumptuousness of suggesting that he knows what all of us understand or do not understand is simply astounding. Arrogant twit. I become annoyed every time I see the title of the thread.

by Anonymousreply 32209/25/2013

I still think it's your minions posting and not you.

by Anonymousreply 32309/25/2013

"They're all nuts", "Sociopaths", "Narcissists", etc, etc.

Interesting reading these responses, and utterly pitiful as well. They either confirm the phrase, "Denial ain't just a river in Egypt" or they are the very ones who keep perpetuating the vicious cycle of BPD from generation to generation. I pray for your children, that you don't do to them what was done to us. I don't hate you, but I do pity you, because without an iota of compassion or understanding, it is all of you who the sick in your souls, and we are the ones who must eat your sins.

by Anonymousreply 32410/06/2013

A gigantic, overflowing volcano of hot garbage, lies, filth, worms, feces, and puke. That's what not only this thread is, but also the "we're so empathetic" chants can be described as.

BPD have no empathy. End of story. They have the imitation of empathy, which, in all honesty, is just self-loathing, guilt, and the inclination to beat oneself up.

Even as a BPD reads the above, they will feel emotion instead of looking at it objectively. All the people you've screwed over, you twist into two parts: "They weren't paying attention to me!" or "They were taking advantage of me!"

But really, it was YOU being hot and cold; being an emotionally retarded child whose early sexual/emotional abuse has truly F-ed you the F up.

When a BPD claims to be too sensitive or too caring or other such nonsense, they are LYING and trying to make themselves feel better. Their guilt isn't about how they've hurt others, it's about how hurting others makes them feel. Big difference. They hate the feeling rather than feel remorse for the act.

This is an absolute fact. Do not ever believe their silver-tongued lies and filth.

by Anonymousreply 32511/05/2013

My name is Andrea Ramsay from USA My boyfriend and I were happy as far as I could tell and I never thought that we would break up. When his cousin died in a tragic car accident he went back to Philippine for a week to be with his family. I could not go because I was in the middle of entertaining out of town clients for work. He did not seem to be upset that I could not go so I let him be. The next thing that I know, he reconnected with an old friend from high school that he had a crush on years ago and they started to have an affair! I had no clue what was going on until a month after he came back from Philippine.He proceeded to see both her and I until I caught him testing her one night. I confronted him and he told me the truth about what happened. We broke up and went our separate ways. Neither of us fought for our relationship. I was angry and decided not to be upset about it and just keep it moving. Then after about a month of not speaking to him I became sad. I wanted him to tell me that he wanted to be with me and not her. I contacted Dr.Agu for a love spell and he totally helped me! he was able to get him to miss me to where he wanted to get back together again. He had a lot of regrets and felt bad for not fighting to keep me and for cheating in general. He values our relationship so much more now and we are together now! You can also get your lover back with the help of Dr. Agu contact him through his email: agulovespell@hotmail.com

by Anonymousreply 32611/11/2013

Reread that R325. You really think there is a difference between feeling bad that you hurt someone and being concerned how you feel when you hurt someone? I doubt there is any real difference.

by Anonymousreply 32711/11/2013

Thanks for making my family happy again, my father came back home and he can even take us out, something he never think of before! i wonder Dr egbenakhue are you god or what? amazing you make things happen! i will .Thank you very much. from Holland if you need his help contact email address Dr egbenakhuespelltemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 32811/14/2013

My name is Owen Chloe from United Kingdom I never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once when i went to Africa in February this year on a business summit. I meant a man who’s name is DR.ROBIN he is really powerful and could help cast spells to bring back one’s gone, lost, misbehaving lover and magic money spell or spell for a good job or luck spell .I’m now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 3 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 4 years. I really loved him, but his mother was against us and he had no good paying job. So when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him. At first i was undecided, skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try. And in 7 days when i returned to Canada, my boyfriend (now husband) called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married. I didn't believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do. Well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid, and my husband also got the new job and our lives became much better. His email is robinhealinghome@yahoo.com

by Anonymousreply 32911/17/2013

my name is Natalia from England, i met Dr Dahiru through a friend who was helped by him. It happened 3 months back when my husband left me for another woman. We have been married for a couple of years and we were about to get married. But suddenly I noticed changes in him like he doesn’t eat at home; he doesn’t come home on time and doesn’t sleep with me the way he used to do before. I used to ask him what went wrong but he answers me with a shout at me. The situation worsens that he doesn’t come home again and she started dating another woman. I was confused and unhappy, that was when i narrated the problem to my friend and he introduced me to great Dr Dahiru .I discussed with Dr Dahiru and he told me not to worry. he has he has been bewitched by the woman he was dating. Dr Dahiru gave me 3 days after he has contacted his oracle and made some sacrifices to his great oracles. To my greatest surprise my husband came home within two days and begged for forgiveness because he has done something bad to me. i want to thank the great Dr Dahiru for what he did in my life. My husband and i are happy back .I recommend him for my friends in this kind of situation that he his the best spell caster. He can be contacted via his email address. arewaspecialisttemple@yahoo.com or his mobile +2348074601888.more grease to your elbow Dr DAHIRU

by Anonymousreply 33011/18/2013

I am Precious Levitte, I promise to share this testimony all over the world once my boyfriend return back to me, and today with all due respect i want to thank Olorun for bringing joy and happiness to my relationship and my family. I want to inform you all that there is a spell caster that is real and genuine. I never believed in any of these things until i loosed my boyfriend, I required help until i found (Olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@gmail.com ) a grate spell caster, And he cast a love spell for me, and he assured me that I will get my boyfriend back in two days after the spell has been cast. two days later, my phone rang, and so shockingly, it was my boyfriend who has not called me for past 3 years now, and made an apology for the heart break, and told me that he is ready to be my back bone till the rest of his life with me. Olorun released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. As I’m writing this testimony right now I’m the most happiest girl on earth and me and my fiance is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up. So that’s why I promised to share my testimony all over the universe.All thanks goes to Olorun for the excessive work that he has done for me. Below is the email address in situation you are undergoing a heart break, and I assure you that as he has done mine for me, he will definitely help you too. email him on; Olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 33111/19/2013

I am Miss Lucy Hollywood., From united states of America.I will start by saying to all that have experience heart break and also cant do with out there lover should please stop here and read up my story, So as you will know how to go solving or getting your ex back from this spell caster..AND AGAIN I WILL WANT TO ALSO TELL ALL THAT THIS SPELL CASTER I WILL WANT TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD ABOUT IS HARMLESS AND DO NOT HAVE ANY SIDE EFFECT, BUT TO RESTORE AND GIVE YOU BACK WHAT YOU DESERVE, COS WHEN I MEET WITH THIS SPELL CASTER THAT WAS INTRODUCED TO ME BY THE WIFE OF MY BOSS IN MY WORKING PLACE, HE MADE IT CLEAR THAT HE CAN CAST SPELL ON SO MANY OTHER PROBLEMS EXCEPT IN GETTING YOUR EX OR MAKING YOUR LOVER TO LOVE YOU MORE THAT WILL SUITE YOU. Last year December, My lover was cheating on me and was not also give me the attention that a man should give to a woman,And really that was troubling my mind and tearing my heart apart to the extent that i was not concentrating in the office the way i use to before the break up by my lover.And before that incident,I always see how my boss use to love his wife so much. I was binging to think that i was not doing the right thing to him that will make him love me forever,So i really gathered my courage and went to my boss wife office to ask her the secret that made her husband love her so dearly,In the first place she refused in telling me,She asked me why i am asking her such a question,That if is it not normal for every man to love his wife.I told her the reason that made me ask her about this question,That my lover started cheating on me lately,When i knelt down before her for her to see my seriousness in this issue that i went to ask her,She opened up to me by telling me that i should not tell anybody about what she want to tell me,The wife to my boss started to say to me that she used a very powerful spell on his husband to love her,And the spell that she used is harmless, But the spell is just to make him love her and never to look for any other woman except her. I QUICKLY ASK HER HOW DID SHE GET TO KNOW THIS GREAT,POWER,DURABLE AND PERFECT WORK SPELL CASTER,she said that a friend of hers also introduce her to him. Then i also ask her how i can meet with this spell caster.SHE SAID EVERYTHING TO ME,THAT THE NAME OF THIS SPELL CASTER IS Dr. DAHIRU TEMPLE. My next question to her was how can i get this wonderful spell caster,She said she is going to give me the email of the spell caster for me to contact him for my problem,Really she gave to me this spell caster email and i contacted him and explained all to him,And after every thing that needed to be done by the spell caster, In the next two days, My lover that hated me so much came to house begging for forgiveness and i was so glad that i have finally gotten my heart desire..I was so grateful to this spell caster for what he has done for my life.. So i made a promise to him that i will always continue telling the world about his wonderful work towards me and also to other that came to you before and also the people that will also get to you from my story that i narrated online now.. I will want to say to the entire world that you should not cry over noting again, That there is a great man that has been helping individuals to restore there Joy and smile in there faces !! The direct email to get this man is : arewaspecialisttemple@yahoo.com This is what i want to tell you all out there,That is thinking that all hope is lost ok..Thanks

by Anonymousreply 33211/23/2013

My name is Sandra and i want to testify of the good work done by a faithful Dr James, a spell caster. in my life i never thought there is such thing as spiritual intercession. my problem started nine months back when the father of my kids started putting up some strange behavior, i never knew he was having an affair outside our matrimonial home. it dawn on me on that faithful day 19th of April 21st 4:23pm when he came to the house to pick his things that was when i knew that situation has gotten out of hand and he then told me he was quitting the marriage which i have built for over five years, i was confused and dumb founded i called on family and friends but to no avail. two months after i started having problem with my kids welfare rent-age and all of it, i really went through hell. until a day i was browsing on the internet and i happen to meet a spell caster i never believed on this but i needed my man back so i gave the spell caster my problem at first i never trusted him so i was just doing it but you know a problem shared is half solved after a week my husband called me telling me that he his coming back home and that was all. now we are living happily and i still do contact him on this email: Olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@live.com OR Olorunoduduwaspiritualtemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 33311/25/2013

I want to say a very big thanks to DR.obas for helping me bring back my husband who left home for good 8years to south Africa for a tourist, where he meet another woman and he was bewitch by the lady,my husband refuse to come back home again,i cry day and night looking for who to help me,i sew a testimony about a powerful spell caster called DR.obas and i contacted the spell caster to help me get my husband back to me and he ask me not to worry about it that the gods will fight for me.. he told me by mid-night when all the spirit is at rest he will cast a spell to reunite my husband back to me. and he did has he said 3 days after my husband com home and he was crying begging me am sorry. am so happy me and my husband are back for good. Thanks be to DR.obas In case u need a good spell caster u can contact him on this Email:obasspiritualtemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 33411/26/2013

Hello my name is john,I know a great spell caster who helped me when I had problem with my wife if you need a right place to solve your problems contact DR WISEMANREVEALSPELL is the right choice. he is a great man that have been casting spells with years of experience. he cast spells for different purposes like.

Contact. WISEMANREVEALSPELL@GMAIL.COM

(1) If you want your ex back. (2) if you always have bad dreams. (3) You want to be promoted in your office. (4) You want women/men to run after you. (5) If you want a child. (6) You want to be rich. (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever. (8) If you need financial assistance. (9) Herbal care.

Contact . WISE on: WISEMANREVEALSPELL@GMAIL.COM

by Anonymousreply 33511/29/2013

Do these moronic spell casters ie con artists, advertise on this thread because they know that people with BPD are easily manipulated?

Why the fuck else would they be here?

The average data lounger isn't going to be interested in their "help"

Do they go around the internet seeking out the emotionally fucked up?

by Anonymousreply 33611/29/2013

They're either looking for BPD twats to victimize or they've been sent our way by some BPD bitch as punishment for discussing them without pulling any punches.

Re:[quote]You really think there is a difference between feeling bad that you hurt someone and being concerned how you feel when you hurt someone?

I'm not the original poster you're addressing but yes, there is a HUGE difference. One shows insight, empathy and genuine emotion. The other is self-serving self pity.

[quote]I doubt there is any real difference.

You are emotionally retarded, R327. Do the world a favor and stay away from other people as much as you can. t

by Anonymousreply 33711/30/2013

My name is Mandy Divanna, am from USA. i want to use this opportunity to thank my great doctor who really made my life a pleasurable one today. This great man DR.GOODLUCK brought my husband back to me, i had three lovely kids for my husband, about four years ago i and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me for one lady. i felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he would come back to me, until one day i met a good friend of mine that was also in a situation like me but her problem was her ex-boyfriend who she had an unwanted pregnancy for and he refused to take responsibility and dumped her. she told me that mine was a small case and that i should not worry about it at all, so i asked her what was the solution to my problems and she gave me this great man email address. i was doubting if this man was the solution, so i contacted this great man and he told me what to do and i deed them all, he told me to wait for just two day and that my husband will come crawling on his kneels just for forgiveness so i faithfully deed what this great man asked me to do and for sure after two days i heard a knock on the door, in a great surprise i saw him on his kneels and i was speechless, when he saw me, all he did was crying and asking me for forgiveness, from that day, all the pains and sorrows in my heart flew away,since then i and my husband and our lovely kids are happy.that's why i want to say a big thank you to DR.GOODLUCK spiritual temple. This great man made me to understand that there is no problem on earth that has no solution so please if you know that you have this same problem or any problem that is similar, i will advise you to come straight to this great man. you can email him at:goodluck05spellcaster@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 33812/05/2013

Hello I am ROSELY HARTFORD ,I am out here to spreed this good news to the entire world on how I got my ex love back.I was going crazy when my love left me for another girl last month, But when i meet a friend that introduce me to Dr UNOKO the great messenger to the oracle that he serve,I narrated my problem to Dr UNOKO about how my ex love left me and also how i needed to get a job in a very big company.He only said to me that i have come to the right place were i will be getting my heart desire without any side effect.He told me what i need to do,After it was been done,In the next 2 days,My love called me on the phone and was saying sorry for living me before now and also in the next one week after my love called me to beg and pleading for the forgiveness,I was called for interview in my desired company were i needed to work as the managing director..I am so happy and overwhelmed that i have to tell this to the entire world to contact Dr UNOKO at the following email address;DR.UNOKOSPELLTEMPLE30@GMAIL.COM OR CALL HIM +2348103508204

by Anonymousreply 33912/06/2013

This description of BPD is spot on. I have it and am also bipolar. I love hard and hurt harder.

by Anonymousreply 34012/06/2013

Thank you you are the best spell caster that i have ever seen in my life the spell you casted for me have work very perfectly my ex boyfriend who live me for over 3week now is back and apologizing for me to come back to him that he is very sorry for the pain he cost me and i am so happy Doctor your spell is nice and make me fill alive again i will keep sharing you good work all over the world about the good spell you cast for me to get John back and i will also give your email address to everybody who is in need of help like you told me that you can cast a spell to bring ex back, Money spell, Protection spell, lotto spell, Good job spell and many other spell you told me you can cast for me if i need them i hope you will find a place to help other so they can give testimonies like me Doctor priest grace please help others many people are have problem try to get help form people but they is nobody like you to help the solve there problem like you do priest grace anyone need the help of this nice man contact him via this email Gracerelationshipspell@gmail.com best regards to your child priest graceEmily form USA.

by Anonymousreply 34112/09/2013

Attention: Are you a a divorced women wishing to reunite with your husband and family in joy and harmony ? Are you having paralysed dream, Maybe you are being tormented by some element of dark forces. Are you having problem in your awaken life or career, Unable to reach to your goals ? Are you hated and rejected by your friends and family due to the condition of your life? Are you experiencing failure and difficulties in your struggle to survive? Do you need your ex lover back to you? Do u need a child and can not get one? Do you want to win lottery? Do you want to cure your HIV? I want to tell you that all hope is not lost as you are not alone in the world. We are gifted and divine people specialised in pro founding solution to your kind of problems. Please, feel free to kindly contact us via our email: UNIQUELOVESPELLCENTER@YAHOO.COM

by Anonymousreply 34212/11/2013

[quote]This description of BPD is spot on. I have it and am also bipolar.

For your own sake, and that of anyone unfortunate enough to encounter you, please kill yourself.

by Anonymousreply 34312/11/2013

drama queens 101: the world revolves around me.

I don't have sympathy for borderlines. Unlike psychopaths and narcissists, they suck you in by preying on sympathy and pity.

This is the end result of feminist entitlement. If they didn't do the fake suicide crap, psychiatrists wouldn't even deal with them. My mom had this problem and if we didn't act like robots it was hours of fighting and her pitting us against each other and beatings like no tomorrow. She only "loved" one of us at a time to use as a weapon against the other.

yeah, she was a "beautiful soul"

by Anonymousreply 34412/11/2013

Correct they prey on your pity and sympathy seeing an ex user friend pull this with unsuspecting people at work and on FB

by Anonymousreply 34512/12/2013

Hello to every one out here, am here to shear my the unexpected miracle that has happen to me three days ago, I came across a post online talking about how she got her ex back to her with the help of the great spell caster who happens to be high Dr Brave that he helped her though i never believe this because i was just wondering how could this be, but i gave my self hope and i contact the spell caster. this is the unbelievable that has happened to me this December I was happily married and we had three kids, we lived together as one because we both loved each other but before i knew it, my husband started acting funny and cheating on me later on, he told me that he cannot continue with me so that was how he left me and my three kids without noting but there was noting i could do to stop him or bring him back to me I work so had to pay the children's schools fee and other responsibility i did this for good five years. I cry all day and night because i don't know what els to do to have my husband back to me until this faithful dey i saw the post from one miss Nicole testifying how the high priest helped her to get her ex back I just wanted to try my luck because i never believe it will work but to my greatest surprise, am singing a new song i contacted the great priest on 2nd of December and he told me not to worry because once he finish caster the spell, that i will get my husband back the unbelievable happened on Friday when i got a call and I was surprise to hear my husbands voice apologizing to me that he is so sorry for keeping alone and came back home and we are happy together again wow, i really appreciate your good work great Dr Brave God bless you and your good work for there noting els i can say than to tell the world about you. So if any one is out here seeing this post and you have similar issue like this, worry no more and contact the only man that can help you this email:bravespellcaster@gmail.com MY Name IS Natalia Wilson

by Anonymousreply 34612/13/2013

My name is Mandy laira am from USA. i want to use this opportunity to thank my great doctor who really made my life a pleasurable one today. This great man DR.EKPEN brought my husband back to me, i had three lovely kids for my husband, about four years ago i and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me for one lady. i felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he would come back to me, until one day i met a good friend of mine that was also in a situation like me but her problem was her ex-boyfriend who she had an unwanted pregnancy for and he refused to take responsibility and dumped her. she told me that mine was a small case and that i should not worry about it at all, so i asked her what was the solution to my problems and she gave me this great man email address. i was doubting if this man was the solution, so i contacted this great man and he told me what to do and i deed them all, he told me to wait for just two day and that my husband will come crawling on his kneels just for forgiveness so i faithfully deed what this great man asked me to do and for sure after two days i heard a knock on the door, in a great surprise i saw him on his kneels and i was speechless, when he saw me, all he did was crying and asking me for forgiveness, from that day, all the pains and sorrows in my heart flew away,since then i and my husband and our lovely kids are happy.that's why i want to say a big thank you to DR.EKPEN spiritual temple. This great man made me to understand that there is no problem on earth that has no solution so please if you know that you have this same problem or any problem that is similar, i will advise you to come straight to this great man. you can email him at:ekpenlovetemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 34712/14/2013

I am Ann Marie and words can't express how happy i am now. Read the story below to see why i am happy and try to save yourself or a friend today by reading this to their ears and thank you...... Imagine a man who come to you with love in his eyes for you and then he come kneeling down, proposing marriage to you and then when you both looked at each other eye ball to eyeball, then you see strong bond of love between you both and you agree to be his love and after the marriage you both enjoy yourself as husband and wife with a strong bond of love and then the first fruit of your union as husband and wife come and you both are happy over it because now he is a father and you are a mother but all of a sudden at work, a young sexy girl is brought as secretary to work for your husband and in the course of her service to him at work, she seduces him to herself thereby gaining control over him and when he comes home, he don't eat your food and he disregards you and show no love and time for the kid and then a fateful day comes by and he tells you, he is no longer interested in you that he don't love you and the kid no longer that he is filing a divorce and then he actually do it and later you get to know that he is having an affair with his secretary and they have relocated to another apartment and everytime you think about him because you love him and wish he could come back and then everyday you pray but he isn't showing remorse or coming back and you don't want the kid to know about it, sometimes when the kid want to ask about daddy, you tell him he is away to Canada working that he would come back to visit and then you hear and read of some psychics and spell-casters who could bring him back but you tried the ones you thought could help you but the situation is worst and he isn't coming back, then you think all hope is lost and your kid become more inquisitive about his dad and you're wanting to tell him the truth but then a friend of yours in another county come to visit you and see how depressed you are and tells you and show you prove how he got his boyfriend back through one powerful spell lord and tells you means on how to reach him and you contact the spell lord and then this powerful man tells you what you must do and then you do exactly as he tells you and then he tells you your desire will manifest in 3 days time and surprisingly, according to the prophesy, he calls you that he is so much sorry that i should forgive him and his son also forgive him and that he is coming home and in the cool evening what you longed for that your love come back to you loving you and never again leave you happens and then you all are again reunited with more love and he write a petition against his secretary and she is sacked and then you both are happy, spending time for your son. So, i am indeed happy today and words can't express my JOY because you just read my story and looking at it from the begining, you would think he won't come back to me that it was an impossible thing but thanks to my friend who talked to me about LORD ESIENDO and a bigger thanks to LORD ESIENDO at HOODOOSPELLCASTS@OUTLOOK.COM for restoring back my love and not just only for me but also for my son and today i am through my article of JOY telling as many that are having problems in their marriage, love life and whatsoever challenges that you might be going through, first thought that should come to your mind is, every problem has an expiry date and second and a must thing that you must do is contact LORD ESIENDO for everybody needs somebody to make it in life.

by Anonymousreply 34812/16/2013

[all posts by pathetic racist, sexist, anti-semitic, homophobic flame bait troll removed (but you might want to not encourage it in the future because it will be back because you keep giving it what it wants and it really does not believe any of the things it types), ISP notified with full text of all posts.]

by Anonymousreply 34912/16/2013

But sometimes, Ted, like you, they are born that way.

by Anonymousreply 35012/16/2013

[all posts by pathetic racist, sexist, anti-semitic, homophobic flame bait troll removed (but you might want to not encourage it in the future because it will be back because you keep giving it what it wants and it really does not believe any of the things it types), ISP notified with full text of all posts.]

by Anonymousreply 35112/16/2013

The orphanage probably cared for him better than she could, and there is no evidence the grandfather was mean and violent towards Ted (as opposed to the women, who didn't go around murdering anyone). He was 4 when his mother remarried and his family life was reasonably happy although he disdained his stepfather apparently from the start. Really you can't get the truth of him from him, but only from others, because he told different stories to different people.

by Anonymousreply 35212/16/2013

[all posts by pathetic racist, sexist, anti-semitic, homophobic flame bait troll removed (but you might want to not encourage it in the future because it will be back because you keep giving it what it wants and it really does not believe any of the things it types), ISP notified with full text of all posts.]

by Anonymousreply 35312/16/2013

No but they are born people and sometimes that is enough.

by Anonymousreply 35412/16/2013

[quote] Imagine a man who come to you with love in his eyes for you and then he come kneeling down, proposing marriage to you and then when you both looked at each other eye ball to eyeball, then you see strong bond of love between you both and you agree to be his love and after the marriage you both enjoy yourself as husband and wife with a strong bond of love and then the first fruit of your union as husband and wife come and you both are happy over it because now he is a father and you are a mother but all of a sudden at work, a young sexy girl is brought as secretary to work for your husband and in the course of her service to him at work, she seduces him to herself thereby gaining control over him and when he comes home, he don't eat your food and he disregards you and show no love and time for the kid and then a fateful day comes by and he tells you, he is no longer interested in you that he don't love you and the kid no longer that he is filing a divorce and then he actually do it and later you get to know that he is having an affair with his secretary and they have relocated to another apartment and everytime you think about him because you love him and wish he could come back and then everyday you pray but he isn't showing remorse or coming back and you don't want the kid to know about it, sometimes when the kid want to ask about daddy, you tell him he is away to Canada working that he would come back to visit and then you hear and read of some psychics and spell-casters who could bring him back but you tried the ones you thought could help you but the situation is worst and he isn't coming back, then you think all hope is lost and your kid become more inquisitive about his dad and you're wanting to tell him the truth but then a friend of yours in another county come to visit you and see how depressed you are and tells you and show you prove how he got his boyfriend back through one powerful spell lord and tells you means on how to reach him and you contact the spell lord and then this powerful man tells you what you must do and then you do exactly as he tells you and then he tells you your desire will manifest in 3 days time and surprisingly, according to the prophesy, he calls you that he is so much sorry that i should forgive him and his son also forgive him and that he is coming home and in the cool evening what you longed for that your love come back to you loving you and never again leave you happens and then you all are again reunited with more love and he write a petition against his secretary and she is sacked and then you both are happy, spending time for your son.

This is all one sentence!

James Joyce is posting on DL from BEYOND THE GRAVE!

by Anonymousreply 35512/16/2013

what a marvelous world we are living in. I am Morris from United State. i was scammed two years ago by fake lottery and loan lender agent that took all my money away. my friend introduce me to Dr Azeez Chibuzo a good spell caster that help him to bring back his divorce wife also cast a spell for me and all my money was return back to me in just 72hours after contacting Dr Azeez Chibuzo via email:healingstemple@live.com,all he requested from me is just the names of the agent that took away my money and withing 72hours after casting the spell all the agent started contacting me and begging to return my money to me. it was unbelievable until my money was transfer back to my account, thank you Dr Azeez Chibuzo . contact him via email healingstemple@live.com if you are in a similar problem or you need your ex lover back or you need a solution to solve one problem or the other.

by Anonymousreply 35612/16/2013

Hello to every one out here, am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me three days ago, My name is James mack i live in United State,and I`m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she did not love me anymore So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day what an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who did not call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website {bravespellcaster@gmail.com},i f you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to "bringing your ex back. So thanks to Dr Brave for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, Thanks..

by Anonymousreply 35712/17/2013

Hello to every one out here, am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me three days ago, My name is James mack i live in United State,and I`m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she did not love me anymore So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day what an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who did not call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website {bravespellcaster@gmail.com},i f you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to "bringing your ex back. So thanks to Dr Brave for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, Thanks..

by Anonymousreply 35812/17/2013

A borderline scumbag who thinks we are big ol' meanies called in the spam. Typical.

by Anonymousreply 35912/17/2013

The "My friend/co-worker/boyfriend/ex is a borderline" posters on here are abso-fuckin-lutely nuts.

Holy shit.

by Anonymousreply 36012/17/2013

A Spell Caster Who help me to get pregnant

My partner and I have been trying have be looking for a baby for over five years now, We were going to a fertility clinic for about 8 months before somebody told us to contact this spell caster who is so powerful, We contacted him at this email;akurasolutiontemple@gmail.com , for him to help us, then we told him our problem, he told us that we will either conceive in February this year ,but after five years of trying we were at a point where we were willing to try anything. And I'm glad we came to Dr Akura Because his pregnancy spell cast put us at ease, and I honestly believe him, and his gods really helped us as well, I am thankful for all he has done. contact him via email: akurasolutiontemple@gmail.com but today i have a happy home with family. if you are trying to get a baby or want your lover back. he has powers to do it, he has done mine.

by Anonymousreply 36112/18/2013

I was married for 8years with out any child,because of this my husband start acting very strange at home,coming home late and not spending time with me any more.So i

became very sad and lost in life because my doctor told me there is no way for me to get pregnant this really make life so hard for me and my family.my sister in law

told me about Prophet Osaze from the Internet,how he has helped people with this similar problem that i am going through so i contacted him and explain to him.he cast

a spell and it was a miracle three days later my husband can back to apologize for all he has done and told me he is fully ready to support me in any thing i want,few

month later i got pregnant and gave birth to twins (girls) we are happy with ourselves. Thanks to Prophet Osaze for saving my relationship and for also saving others

too. continue your good work, If you are interested to contact him and testify this blessings like me, the great spell caster email address:spirituallove@hotmail. com

by Anonymousreply 36212/18/2013

The desire to stay away from "BPD-people" specially of those who come in contact with them is completely understandable. However, it makes no sense to actually attack. I think we need to think beyond the victim and victimized mindset. Yes, there is cause and effect, and yes there is the taking responsibility for ones own actions. But none of them really matter, in my opinion, when we are talking about conditions such as BPD. Intact, what is constant in almost every single person is that he or she wants to survive. Pain alerts us to danger. He wants to survive, so he does what he can to minimize pain. I know how society holds Altruism as noble, but narcissism as quite the opposite sometimes. But every person first and foremost thinks about themselves. I'm not saying they are incapable of thinking of others but if they themselves feel to be in danger most of the time, they won't be able to tend to the needs of others.

by Anonymousreply 36312/19/2013

Is that how you justify being a psycho nasty asshole to anyone unlucky enough to wander into your life R363?

BPD's are always whining that nothing is their fault, that they are in pain and can't help what they do. But that is a load of self pitying crap as far as I am concerned.

We all have pain, you aren't unique. The only difference is is that the rest of us don't choose to use that pain to be manipulative and attention seeking.

by Anonymousreply 36412/20/2013

As I had said, I don't look at anything to blame or find fault with, because that's hardly helpful to anyone. By saying that they deal with pain the way they do is not to justify how some (not all) may treat others, but to provide a basis for understanding and further helping people involved in the situation - both the BPD and the "non" BPD.

For you to assume that I am a "psycho nasty asshole" is actually far from truth and that is based on evidence. But I point this out that your own false assumption is the result of the pain that you experience. In this instant, you accuse me of something I am not, which is clearly malicious, but is also born out of pain.

I don't feel attacked, I am only pointing out an obvious tendency in the human nature.

by Anonymousreply 36512/20/2013

Also, when I say "pain" I mean existential pain.

Allow me to explain: The kind of pain born out of feeling that you are painfully alive and a part of this world which completely rejects you. It's being codependent to the point of feeling one's life depends on how happy he/she is in the relationship. But it's also more.

What I am trying to say is that when such a pain arrises, we try to survive, survive, survive, and that's it. Inflicting pain upon others cannot be justified, I don't think so. But justification is different from explanation, and that surely qualifies as an explanation.

I wish I could stop the pain one person at a time, but that is going to take more than just one person. You cannot let anything get in the way, you have to believe in people - which is extremely difficult, and you have to be compassionate no matter what. Not at the cost of Intelligence, of course.

We have to heal.

by Anonymousreply 36612/20/2013

I don't know if I believe that a constant sense of attack breeds thoughtlessness towards others. I've been in situations where I was attacked all the time and still managed to be nice.

by Anonymousreply 36712/20/2013

Precisely, but it may be difficult for some people to be. But if everyone was that way, it would be a happier world.

by Anonymousreply 36812/20/2013

Everyone posting here sounds like a certified nut. Lordy.

by Anonymousreply 36912/20/2013

Hello to every one out here, am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me three days ago, My name is James mack i live in United State,and I`m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she did not love me anymore So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day what an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who did not call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website {bravespellcaster@gmail.com},i f you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to "bringing your ex back. So thanks to Dr Brave for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, Thanks..

by Anonymousreply 37012/20/2013

My Name is PRELLY WESTLEY..I never believed in Love Spells or Magics until I met this special spell caster when i contact this man called agbadado@gmail.com Execute some business..He is really powerful..My wife divorce me with no reason for almost 4 years and i tried all i could to have her back cos i really love her so much but all my effort did not work out.. we met at our early age at the college and we both have feelings for each other and we got married happily for 5 years with no kid and she woke up one morning and she told me she’s going on a divorce..i thought it was a joke and when she came back from work she tender to me a divorce letter and she packed all her loads from my house..i ran mad and i tried all i could to have her back but all did not work out..i was lonely for almost 4 years…So when i told the spell caster what happened he said he will help me and he asked for her full name and her picture..i gave him that..At first i was skeptical but i gave it a try cos have tried so many spell casters and there is no solution…so when he finished with the readings,he got back to me that she’s with a man and that man is the reason why she left me…The spell caster said he will help me with a spell that will surely bring her back.but i never believe all this…he told me i will see a positive result within 3 days..3 days later,she called me herself and came to me apologizing I NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE SPELLS UNTIL I MET THIS WORLD'S TOP SPELL CASTER. HE IS REALLY POWERFUL AND COULD HELP CAST SPELLS TO BRING BACK ONE'S GONE,LOST,MISBEHAVING LOVER AND MAGIC MONEY SPELL OR SPELL FOR A GOOD JOB.I'M NOW HAPPY & A LIVING TESTIMONY COS THE WOMAN I HAD WANTED TO MARRY LEFT ME 2 WEEKS BEFORE OUR WEDDING AND MY LIFE WAS UPSIDE DOWN COS OUR RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN ON FOR 2YEARS... I REALLY LOVED HIM, BUT HIS MOTHER WAS AGAINST US AND HE HAD NO GOOD PAYING JOB. SO WHEN I MET THIS SPELL CASTER, I TOLD HIM WHAT HAPPENED AND EXPLAINED THE SITUATION OF THINGS TO HIM..AT FIRST I WAS UNDECIDED,SKEPTICAL AND DOUBTFUL, BUT I JUST GAVE IT A TRY. AND IN 7 DAYS WHEN I RETURNED TO USA, MY GIRLFRIEND (NOW WIFE) CALLED ME BY HERSELF AND CAME TO ME APOLOGIZING THAT EVERYTHING HAD BEEN SETTLED WITH HIS MOM AND FAMILY AND SHE GOT A NEW JOB INTERVIEW SO WE SHOULD GET MARRIED..I DIDN'T BELIEVE IT COS THE SPELL CASTER ONLY ASKED FOR MY NAME AND MY GIRLFRIENDS NAME AND ALL I WANTED HIM TO DO... WELL WE ARE HAPPILY MARRIED NOW AND WE ARE EXPECTING OUR LITTLE KID,AND MY WIFE ALSO GOT THE NEW JOB AND OUR LIVES BECAME MUCH BETTER. IN CASE ANYONE NEEDS THE SPELL CASTER FOR SOME HELP, HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS;agbadado@gmail.com ......HOPE HE HELPS YOU OUT OUR OPPORTUNITY ... CONTACT THIS GREAT SPELL CASTER VIA EMAIL:agbadado@gmail.com or call his cell phone number +2347060552255...

by Anonymousreply 37112/23/2013

Webmaster, can you please just delete this thread?

by Anonymousreply 37212/23/2013

The

R364 true

by Anonymousreply 37312/23/2013

Esteemed doctors, would you posit that there is a direct correlation between BPD and WTF?

by Anonymousreply 37412/24/2013

OP, does that old lady in the Med-Alert TV commercial suffer with BPD? She buzzed for the Med-Alert agent. When the agent asks if she should send an ambulance the old lady says "oh, I don't want to be a bother." Instead she suggests that the agent call her friend Julie... and we all know what a cunt Julie is.

Is this classic BPD?

by Anonymousreply 37512/24/2013

no, that's histrionic

by Anonymousreply 37612/24/2013

Anon#51 hits it on the head, like SO many other here; I spent f.5 years with the most dangerous type of borderline; sophisticated, worldly, talented, charming, highly educated, anbitious, hard-working, with all the advantages of decent parents, stable home life and lots of people who admired her. She was also deeply, stunningly beautiful. Young. Mature in many ways. But a maladjusted, mean-hearted, weak, manipulative, totally selfish person in the interpersonal love realm. She was only hell to her men, and I had the honor of being her longest-lived victim. She's supposedly married now,and set up her husband to be while our bed was still almost warm, while holding on to me, she set the next relationship up. Now he's in a world of hurt. Borderlines are FAR more dangerous than even sociopaths, or narcissists. It's because they have emotional lives. horribly dysregulated ones, but they WANT love. They don't have a vessel to hold it with, notr can they give it, so they ARE tragic. Add that to a woman who's enduringly, uncommonly beautiful, witty, smart, charming, and capable of sweetness and passion...and you might as well just shoot yourself in the head when she "falls in love with you." If she also holds or (espouses) high values and you're of the same stripe, you're in for a mind ***k you NEVER imagined, as your white knight gets battered to hell, and you are left hurt, questioning love, your judgement, perhaps unable to conceive of really trusting or loving again, IF...IF you EVER find someone who is so attractive so as to adore co completely again. That's my problem. Two years out, I have found no one who compares in attractiveness ( I loved her for her good qualities, NOT her dramatic bullcrap or the infantile behavior, or the push and pull). Sd thing...dangerous thing about her, is she is an emotional vampire, AND a person with qualities a man with high standards will wait for, and be faithful to...why pass up what could be the best woman you could ever hope to find. Oh by the way...she's a PSYCHOLOGIST! and a good one, by her associate's accounts. My current lover is sick to death of suspicions I still love my borderline ex. I do NOT. I love what she was to me, what she could have been, the great and adorable qualities she had. As for loving her? There's really nobody there to love...a shell, an animal who looks like a normal human, but has a tragic but more importantly dangerous difference; no real empathy, just a VERY desireable, convoluted, complex disguise. BPDS who are drop dead beautiful, talented, smart and have otherwise good characteristics/values are like death. She NEVER gave, really...I believed my strong love would help heal her. All I did was usher her into a calmer state of total disorder...less outbursts. Age 29 to age 35...but she'll likely never be a whole person, or really love. She maybe didn't really love me, and does love her husband (assuming they got married, or are still married a year later). In my heart of hearts, I have accepted the possibility that she CAN love another...it was just she didn't love me enough. But why the longest relationship of her life? I'm not wealthy...I did not support her. She's not that type... Maybe she will truly settle with her man (also a therapist!) Oh God, he must be a user himself, or a total moron. Truth is, despite my fears, he'll likely be the next victim...already is, but will suffer worse due to the legal paper, and God forbid they have a child. Yeah, The BPD is the most dangerous human animal out there. Healing takes a long time; longer by far than with more normal relationships.

by Anonymousreply 37712/25/2013

Quoting and commenting on the ASTOUNDING continuity of BPD behavior, regardless of specific circumstance: It's a VITAL lesson for readers who wonder "Is my BPD lover curable? Will I FINALLY land them as a true partner?" No... read this from Reply #105: ----------------------------------------------------------- "True borderline personalities employ splitting as a coping mechanism developed as vulnerable infants. They have not learned the basic lesson most infants achieve. That the source of all gratification (mother) sometimes is not available at the moment of need, but she will be available again and can be trusted. If course, borderlines have probably endured much more deprivation and neglect, even abuse, than most infants.

As adults, they idealize the love object, go to great lengths to win and please them. They fall in love quickly and often. This love object is the "good mother", the source of all good feelings. When their expectations and extreme needs can't be met they split, the all good object now becomes the bad object. This leads to the extremely dramatic ups and downs anyone who has had a relationship with one can attest to. They are often desperately pertinent but are unable to change the dynamic.

When a borderline leaves or is forced from a relationship, the partner is often amazed that the person who may have been near suicidal and clinging is very quickly into a new intense relationship. Another example of splitting." ----------------------------------------------------------- This is in essence, whatI lived with my BPD woman of 6 years. Posessed of EVERY advantage; beauty of almost incomparable level, great intelligence, good parents who truly supported her, friends, admirers, a great work ethic, a great career, she exhibited these traits just as described. I pegged her early on, but chose to believe she was really able to outgrow it. A mistake I'd only make once. In the end, I'm maybe a slightly more special nobody, but she split me off, and discontinued all contact except the few times it benefited HER. If I contacted her, she got quite defensive, as if I were trying to interfere with her "new life." Only a disordered, cold person Pre-boinds into a new relationship after six years, professes lasting love for the ex, holds on to them at arms length, establishes the new one, then demands to be left entirely alone. They erase you as best they can, because the pain of their henious treatment of you reminds them how rotten they are at the core, and scares them to DEATH...they would feel permanently unloveable if they actully owned and accepted their betrayals, their non-loyalty, their utter USE of their lovers. So they split you off and may paint a nearly psychotic picture of you being "well" after they left you. They cry crocodile tears as they leave, saying they'll never stop loving you, but you helped them so much to be able to treat their next lover well...they owe it all to you. You're the finest man they ever knew... You are a beautiful man...but they MUST move forward with their new man, so they can be happy...and they ask you, then demand that you let them go, though they never gave you closure..they act like the years you spent on healing them, and adoring them, are just too old and worn to revisit, and it just is practical and sensible to start a new life. My ex nearly got hysterical because after SIX YEARS together, and no real declaration of a breakup, she had a couple of casual dates with guys , and did not tell me until later...she set up a new man whom she'd known for years, while we were in a reconciliation period. She slept in my bed one night, got up and went to work and I never saw her again...she broke up with me over the phone, in a series of weepy calls over a two month period, while telling me she wanted and loved me, desired me, but felt she had to move on in this new direction. She slit my emotional throat while crying about how much it hurt HER, and played her new man at the same time, probably telling him I was a great partner, but it just didn't work out...

by Anonymousreply 37812/25/2013

The similarities of so many "non's" experiences here are astounding. Though BPD is indeed a wastebasket category in some sense, it is no less a real entity. Only "wastebasket diagnosis" b/c of the complexity and overlap of symptoms, and the (truly) delusional quality of a BPDs thoughts at times. They do INDEED spill over into at least mild psychotic thought at times, and like chronic schizophrenics, (this is sad, if you have loved, adored one) there is a damaged baseline of thought there...very, very subtle. The more sophisticated and intelligent they are, the harder it is to see. One must be quite empathic, and observant of human nature to spot it, but you see it in the eyes of your lover sometimes, that shadow of being slightly out of sync with reality. Yes, it is tied up in the fear, the lonliness, the lack of object permanence, but this very fundamental insult to basic human security is obviously a potent trigger for their disordered thought. It's one of the reasons the "Non" NEVER REALLY GETS TO HAVE THEIR BELOVED BPD...Their beloved isn't all there. No matter the gravity of their personality or their brilliance and vibrance as a human animal, parts of their brain are structurally altered...they slip back there, and they're gone, again & again. When they return, moments or days later, they still only return to a degree. It's not like florid schizophrenia, all disorganized...it's subtle. And they can & will lead "normal," highly productive lives if they have high mental horsepower and a lot of will. But they don't come around to that basic calm acceptance of love, object permanence, and a willingness to let momentary deep fears pass...those fears of abandonment come from a lack of the structure that is in a Non's brain. It isn't going to be constructed in the BPD brain. All you get, at best (worst) is a lifetime with someone who really can't love you, nor hold your love. That's why they appear as a stranger so often, deep inside. They are. Unto themselves, and you. If you NEVER fight them, never raie your voice, show UNCONITIONAL love and sacrifice, it ultimately changes nothing, except they will perhaps rage at you less, or not at all. But when they leave you, ask THEM to be there for YOU? You will see thie defenses kick in, and they can become hysterical, or close to it. They will act like you're trying to sabotage their new love, their new life, and pull some morally absurd lecture on you...though they left you cut open and abandoned. They do not keep promises. Mine truly never even MADE a full promise to me, b/c she KNEW she could/ would not keep it. I saved her for five years. When I was at my rope's end, and needed a friend to survive the suicidality Wellbutrin put me through, she simply, literally, turned her back, and wouldn't even answer an email that simply asked for a friend to talk to. The coldness at their core is total. If you love one, consider the fate of everybody here. I would truly tell ANYONE I knew: Love will not cure them. YOu will only spend your faith in love on them, and possibly find yourself jaded for the first time in your life. The degree of warpage and damage BPDs inflict on those who truly deeply love them is deep, and unfolds over months and YEARS. You must reconstruct yourself after the relationship, because you had to dismantle and rearrange reality and self -esteeem to pay for the chance to have them. You had to try to be a knight in the truest sense, a servant, a person with a limitless love, and a sense of undying mission...but the mission was to an unwinable , ultimately twisted goal. In time, months or years after they've gone, you see how absurd the task was. Then you realize you are fundamentally altered. You became a party to their sad drama, an actor, a facilitator, and it changed you. You swallowed so many lies, so many delusions. I am not saying it is hopeless for you. At year two, I can only say, I am a different man, like a soldier who's seen a lot of death, and killed people. I am not looking to be who I once was, because I don't want that mantle of being "GOOD."

by Anonymousreply 37912/25/2013

(REPLY 379, Continued) As I said, I no longer want the mantle of being "GOOD." I have spent it all. I am looking at a more open concept of human morality, one accepts that of the whole of our population, a percentage are like different animals...the BPD is very much apart. And true, serious narcisssists, and Sociopaths are, as well, and schizophrenis are, too...they are different in their brains, their minds, and what can be rationally expected of them. That the BPD (the high functioning one with all the great qualities) is no less apart at the core...where love, empathy and object permanence are concerned. And these are the heart of love, the heart of obligation, the heart of relationships. Altruism. Some of it is necessary for love. The BPD is so abhorrent of this; Mine was a psychologist...yes, a therapist. A serious worker, but a BPD. What she did at work did NOT make her better in our love life. She flipped a switch and ws a two year old when her illness pulled her down. Knowing all this, living all the battles, all the tests, the countless dissociations I HAD to make, to remain with her, and keep my love intact, I no longer expect or even WANT to return to whom I was before we met. I know I am forever altered. I have no particular belief or strong after (after two years ) and a one-year intimate relationship that is ongoing, that I cannot love again. But I look at my prospects openly and say 'I don't know." That was the soldier analogy. I've been too much in the mud and the blood, hurt too deeply, far too many times, and ALWAYS sucked it up without recrimination. Those acts of sacrifice spent a lot of the faith I had in love. Now I view everybody in perhaps a more realistic light...not bitterly cynical, but that sense of total trust I carried well into adulthood as a part of my core (trust for my lover) may never reappear. I was posessed of good self-esteem (surely with issues, but aware of them, and well within "norma"). I have had lifelong advantages of good looks, intelligence, good parents, education, you name it. No one has altered me for the worse as she did. No one could have. If she lacked the good traits, it would have been over our first night together. But the strange thing is, the good and the bad always did, and always will, coexist in that one BPD woman. That is at the heart of the paradox, and what drives much of the confusion in the aftermath...and what makes me look at other women, for the first time ever, with caution. Not just common sense, but doubt. This is not a lament. I made my choice. I would not do it again for anybody. I was in intense therapy for 8 months after my ex left me into the arms of her "PREBOUND" lover, who she set up while still holding on to me, and is now married to. I learned only two things from the therapy. The simplest, the one to pass on, is this. "If you sense that your lover is a BPD...if you see this in someone again, don't walk...RUN! Haha, it's good to laugh I do laugh now, and I'm so thankful for it! I look back and realize I've regained something vital...the will to live, possibly alone for the rest of my days, because I am alive, and that MAY be enough. And the humor of it all, even the terrible stuff, is a relief. Good luck to you...if you get with a BPD, you either have to be tough, or get tougher, when it's over. I believe life can go on. A year ago I was just leaving hell. Now, I can crack a genuine smile and laugh.

by Anonymousreply 38012/25/2013

What a bizarre thread--though there are some excellent posts mixed in.

But it reminded me why I have no contact with my BP relative. Enough time goes by and you sort of forget just how bad it was. Because it's really nuts and unbelievable how bad it can be.

So, thanks--cuz I occasionally get family pressure to reconnect, but I'm not going back.

by Anonymousreply 38112/26/2013

When the man I love broke up with me, my world fell apart. I had gone

to several casters and I got no results. Until I found

seraphintemple@gmail.com and gave another try to retrieve my lover and

restore the passionate relationship I had with him. I’m glad I did all

that he requested of me and trusted him. He performed a spiritual

cleansing to banish negative energies that was fighting against our

relationship and casted a love spell. After four days, the man I missed

dearly started to call me and told me how much he really missed me and

that he is sorry for leaving me in the cold. Help me to say Thank

DR SERAPHIN of SERAPHINTEMPLE his Email address seraphintemple@gmail.com or mobile number +2348131258106

by Anonymousreply 38212/26/2013

They fear being abandoned b/c of their upbringing. Unstable. The BPD people I've known have only been passably attractive but never knock-outs. They can't come to grips with not being stunning and there you have their unstable sense of self.

by Anonymousreply 38312/26/2013

What does looks have to do with it?

by Anonymousreply 38412/26/2013

'Too sensitive' - yes, absolutely. But empathy they totally lack. They feel like they're under attack all the time - all their sh!t is about them 'defending themselves' and they really, really believe it. That 'Amy's Bakery' chick is a perfect example.

by Anonymousreply 38512/26/2013

#383: My BPD ex was indeed one of the most enduringly beautiful women I've ever known or even seen. And not a boring type of symmetry like Christie Brinkley, or a made-up Angelina Jolie, collagen-pumped creation. !00% natural, just lovely. A look of strong character and deep awareness, with a sense of charm coupled with vulnerability and integrity. Yet she was *ridiculously* insecure at times. In six years, among virtually everyone I ever knew, in almost all rooms we'd enter, heads would turn, and people constantly told me; "Your girlfriend is so beautiful." And other such things. And she was. Yet she had a paranoid radar sometimes. We walked into a room with at least two hundred people one night, and a woman(friend of a friend she'd never seen) made the briefest eye contact with me. My ex harped on that all night long. I was so unprepared to defend her implied accusations, they were so crazy. She referred to this other woman as "Your Girlfriend" for WEEKS. The sad irony is, I would never have taken *anyone* seriously, because I loved my ex. Looks were not paramount when I met her. She just was my ultimate "type," as a bonus. I adored her, and NEVER gave the slightest impression of wanting anyone else. Everywhere she ever went, she was simply, uncommonly beautiful. But she was as insecure and brittle as a total beauty could be. God help the BPD that isn't stunning. They'd probably feel like killing themselves, because if there's one thing a BPD tragically needs, is *more attention, love and admiration than they can possibly use.* So sad, for EVERYONE involved.

by Anonymousreply 38612/26/2013

#385 wrote: 'Too sensitive' - yes, absolutely. But empathy they totally lack. They feel like they're under attack all the time - all their sh!t is about them 'defending themselves' and they really, really believe it. That 'Amy's Bakery' chick is a perfect example."

SO TRUE. Here again, I see the stunning similarity of Nons' and therapists' encounters with BPDs. Though some are high functioning, some low, most average, a few stunning, all share the traits you mentioned. Sensitive indeed. Feeling under attack, in the case of my ex, it was so sad, because those whom she felt or imagined were attacking her, were probably jealous, and had far less mental horsepower, or power of any type. But that didn't matter. She could have about anything she wanted, due to natural gifts, and her strong will, but was often hamstrung by her fear of others undercutting her...she didn't understand her own capabilities. No amount of love and support could really help that, because like with other BPDs, she slipped back into irrational fear, insecurity and the subtle paranoia that accompanied it on a daily to momentary basis. Always getting sucked back into that irrational place. And from THAT place, came the need to defend, to lash out...she did indeed BELIEVE it. It was not just a cry for attention. She really was scared and hurt. Really sensitive...TO HER OWN WOUNDS. But, this did NOT extend to me, her lover of six years. If it was about her, then it was about her. If it was about ME, it usually ended up being about her, also. Sounds ridiculous, and it was. Once, early in our relationship, she had abdominal pain. I put down my work and was at the hospital like a rocket, to be with her. I Spent hours gladly waiting there, to be present and help her. She ended up being fine, but I showed the type of love & care that would make good humorous scenes in a movie. After several years of being together, she once had to take me to the hospital. Later she told me I knew how much she loved me because she would go through taking me to the ER. See, the idea implied is that it hurt and scared HER to witness me being in danger. To her, the danger was HERS. Helping me was secondary. Her lover might be lost or hurt, so SHE was a victim. She resented me for it. Definitely, no empathy among BPDs.

by Anonymousreply 38712/26/2013

I strongly suspect this "diagnosis" is giving cover to plenty of people with poor impulse control and delusions of grandeur.

The behaviours described are in no way connected with sensitivity or empathy let alone an excess of either.

Most of the people who are labled BPD are manipulators who have found cover and self importance under the guise of legit medicine.

However, there is only anecdotal evidence that BPD even exists and the outlandish claims of deep empathy and sensitivity are absolute manipulative self aggrandizing bullshit.

Are BPD's never able to control their outbursts or their intense desire to manipulate based on the circumstances they are in?

Can they be charming when it suits them and a screaming banshee when that offers more manipulative control?

You bet. These people are in total control and not out of it for a second.

The people who enable them need to build up enough self esteem to get away.

by Anonymousreply 38812/26/2013

Reply 388: I think you're right, in that BPDs have no excess of empathy. They lack it as much as sociopaths in some cases. And yes, they do have delusions at times, often with a dysfunctional baseline grip on objective reality; they can be subtly skewed toward beliefs of persecution, though the smarter ones have some awareness of it, and work to keep it under control. They even work real hard at it. But BPD is not simply Delusional Disorder or poor impulse control. I am hardly an apologist for them. Far from it, I think they should be avoided at all costs. I just have the unfortunate personal experience and the friendship of counseling professionals who indeed believe BPD-even as a perplexing condition- surely exists. My education is in psych & I have some clinical experience, though I did not pursue it as a career. My personal experience in very close quarters with a BPD leaves me with no doubt that the cluster of behaviors and thoughts is distinct enough to identify. Of course it exists on a spectrum. Of course there is co-morbidity. Of course there are other disorders and traits that, taken individually, resemble BPD in those dimensions, and vice-versa. But BPD gets quite distinct when one looks at it closely enough for long enough. It's one very complex, multifaceted disorder, with no cure I know of...and so vexing, because there IS emotion in the BPD, and a genuine desire to be better (if only to be "happy"), whereas sociopaths are more like robots, and pure narcissists really just think they're superior and don't have a need for *true* love. BPDS want and need boundless love, but can't hold it or give it. That's the difference. Their emotion is quite real...just not steady (You can't imagine how rapidly they can swing from "ok" , to scared of abandonment, to betrayed and hurt, to lost in serious depression, to self loathing, to faux-repentant...that's also a hallmark, no one is as unstable). They really do live in hell. But I know firsthand their hell is not something you can rescue them from. You can only ease their hell a bit by being a compliant victim, and feed them until they've used you up, and seek the next victim. But They are in a unique category.

by Anonymousreply 38912/26/2013

This thread is a mess. Maybe if we fill it up quickly the whole thing will die.

by Anonymousreply 39012/26/2013

TO ANONYMOUS REPLY #390: Apart from the BIZARRE posts about some weird praying, fortune-teller-Santeria type crap with delusional references to some mysterious supernatural intervention, I see this huge thread as a really important discussion. Some of us are nons, who got our lives nearly wrecked by BPD relationships. Some are therapists...some are BOTH. My education and research were in psychology, and I had the good fortune to become close personal friends with one brilliant researcher/clinician who I've spent many an hour in heart-to heart discussions about the hard-wired nature of BPD and similar conditions. No psychobabble in these exchanges...just backed up by decades of serious research, clinical work and deep insight into personal relationships that even therapists/scientists get into. This thread reflects those discussions very well. It can't be dismissed just because some people are off the mark or crazy. I wish there were more such threads, where there wasn't a lot of vitriol...even though understandable, the sites where therapists run threads that utterly trash BPDs, strain one's belief. I have not (seen) too much of that here. Merely the debate about whether BPD types feel emotion-or empathy, and that's a valid question. My long-lived and considered opinion is, "NO," They do not have love or empathy. They DO have feelings...that change by the moment, and they're understandably wrapped up in self-protection throughout their lives. They are in survival mode, and may WANT to be better, but just don't cut it. So they make victims of trusting hearts. BPD as a concept can be debated, but to those living in the "trenches" with it every day, it's quite recognizable as an entity...identifiable enough. What decent threads like this do, is tie together the great commonality of the disorder. Splitting hairs becomes irrelevant. Some protesters here may be BPDs..I don't blame them...it's an affront to their character, which is shaky enough. To trollers, well, they're just drinking beer and having an ill-gotten laugh. To those who haven't the experience or insight to sort the thing out, sure they may argue. But for those who have had to live these terrible relationships, again, this has been a MOST useful thread, with lots of varied people helping to define the condition (spectrum notwithstanding) as a devastating and harmful condition...for the nons, and the therapists. For the BPDs, a hell I would not wish on anyone. Understand BPDs, and avoid them. Have only the sympathy you can afford them; they won't return the favor!

by Anonymousreply 39112/27/2013

If the spellcasters are so brilliant, why didn't they divine this is a gay board.

by Anonymousreply 39212/27/2013

All the info you'll read on the internet about BPDs being unable to control themselves and being "so caring it hurts" is mostly written by two types of people: those who've been conned into thinking that, and by sympathy-hogging BPDs themselves.

IT IS BS to keep you feeling sorry for them. Go to any BPD blog and try to talk about the people left dead, in jail, or with PTSD after trying to love a BPD. They (the BPDs on the blog/forum) will call you an a-hole for even DARING to talk about it, and they'll flip it into them being victims, not the actual victims being victims. Sound familiar?

It is all lies. All the advice to use SET, JADE, and other 'empathetic techniques' to soothe your BPD are tools invented to KEEP YOU HOOKED to them. It's an amazing masterpiece of deception of which Satan himself would be proud.

Go to a place like psycheforums and just sit back and objectively read the advice BPDs there give, or the rare honest confessions they make. THEY ENJOY AND DELIBERATELY **** PEOPLE OVER. THEY WILL LIE TO SEND YUOU TO JAIL. THEY WILL BREAK YOUR HEART UNTIL YOU COMMIT SUICIDE AND THEY WILL LAUGH ON YOUR GRAVE.

DO NOT. I REPEAT. DO NOT FALL FOR THEIR LIES ABOUT BEING CONFUSED LITTLE ANGELS. That's part of their sick little game.

THEY ARE SOCIOPATHS and very sick, diseased people. Their victim playing is SUPREME.

by Anonymousreply 39301/10/2014

sometimes just reading something you already know is often a restart button, we all have a level of BPD some more extreme but knowing it is the first step to helping one often take a step back and looking a second time at our reaction and recalculating.. the PBD disorder is often more elevated when we spend large amounts of time behind social media were we can lash out and comment without honest physical repercussion making us more likely to exaggerate a situation

by Anonymousreply 39401/15/2014

I am Becky by name. Greetings to every one that is reading this testimony. I have been rejected by my husband after three(3) years of marriage just because another woman had a spell on him and he left me and the kid to suffer. one day when i was reading through the web, i saw a post on how this spell caster on this address dr.okorospelltemple01@gmail.com, have help a woman to get back her husband and i gave him a reply to his address and he told me that a woman had a spell on my husband and he told me that he will help me and after 3 days that i will have my husband back. i believed him and today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the power to bring lovers back. because i am now happy with my husband. Thanks for Dr. Okoro. His email: dr.okorospelltemple01@gmail.com

Dr. OKORO NUMBER: +2348053209149

by Anonymousreply 39501/16/2014

Hello My name is Mrs Angelica Londos from united states Daly city ca, i am married with two kids. Life has been a misery for me and my kids for over six years when my husband dumped me for his new mistress due to some minor misunderstanding that we had. So he engage in a fight with me and throw me out of the house, so all through these sorrowful period of my life, i have been in pain. So one day, as i was browsing through the internet, i came across many post about spell casters testifying how they were helped by them so i decided to seek help and advice. but naturally i didn't believe in spells or magic powers but due to the fact that i was deeply in love with my husband, i decided to go for a try, So i came in contact with Dr. Aire of drairesolutioncenter@gmail.com but before i contact Dr. Aire, i was scammed by alot of spell casters who makes me believe that they can help me. So because of all these, i almost lost hope that i can't get my husband back anymore so when i contacted this Dr. Aire, he assure me that he will help me to reunite my marriage, so without demanding any single cent from me, he did a spell for me and he advice me to wait for just 24 hours. I actually waited as he said, so when it was 24 hours after he did the spell, my husband actually called me on my mobile phone and started apologizing for everything that he had caused me and the kids. This was how my marriage was reunited again and Starting from this point till date, i and my husband has been living peacefully and happily. Anybody viewing this testimony should please stop by and read and if you are so interested in contacting Dr. Aire for any help, simply do that via his email id (drairesolutioncenter@gmail.com) and remain happy. Thanks.

by Anonymousreply 39601/20/2014

An amazing testimony on a spell caster who brought my wife back to me.. My name is Mike Davis, i live in Australia,and I’m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids.A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife. so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce. she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she didn’t love me anymore. So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail. and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife. So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too. So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited. {bravespellcaster@gmail.com}. So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day. What an amazing statement!! I never believed, so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who didn’t call me for the past seven {7} months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back. So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster. So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website {bravespellcaster@gmail.com},i f you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to “bringing your ex back. thanks to the DR BRAVE for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again. Thanks… Mike Davis

by Anonymousreply 39701/28/2014

An amazing testimony on a spell caster who brought my wife back to me.. My name is Mike Davis, i live in Australia,and I’m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids.A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife. so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce. she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she didn’t love me anymore. So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail. and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife. So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too. So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited. {bravespellcaster@gmail.com}. So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day. What an amazing statement!! I never believed, so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who didn’t call me for the past seven {7} months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back. So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster. So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website {bravespellcaster@gmail.com},i f you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to “bringing your ex back. thanks to the DR BRAVE for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again. Thanks… Mike Davis

by Anonymousreply 39801/28/2014

THANKS TO GREAT DR AISABU FOR SOLVING MY PROBLEMS HIS EMAIL IS (aisabulovespell@gmail.com)

i was married to my husband for 5 years we were living happily together for this years and not until he traveled to Italy for a business trip where he met this girl and since then he hate me and the kids and love her only. so when my husband came back from the trip he said he does not want to see me and my kids again so he drove us out of the house and he was now going to Italy to see that other woman. so i and my kids were now so frustrated and i was just staying with my mum and i was not be treating good because my mother got married to another man after my father death so the man she got married to was not treating her well, i and my kids where so confuse and i was searching for a way to get my husband back home because i love and cherish him so much so one day as i was browsing on my computer i saw a testimony about this spell caster DR AISABU testimonies shared on the internet by a lady and it impress me so much i also think of give it a try. At first i was scared but when i think of what me and my kids are passing through so i contact him and he told me to stay calm for just 24 hours that my husband shall come back to me and to my best surprise i received a call from my husband on the second day asking after the kids and i called DR. AISABU and he said your problems are solved my child. so this was how i get my family back after a long stress of brake up by an evil lady so with all this help from DR AISABU, i want you all on this forum to join me to say a huge thanks to DR AISABU, and i will also advice for any one in such or similar problems or any kind of problems should also contact him his email is (aisabulovespell@gmail.com) he is the solution to all your problems and predicaments in life. once again his email address is (aisabulovespell@gmail.com)

HE IS SPECIALIZE IN THE THE FOLLOWING SPELL.

(1) If you want your ex back. (2) if you always have bad dreams. (3) If you want to be promoted in your office. (4) If you want women/men to run after you. (5) If you want a child. (6) If you want to be rich. (7) If you want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever. (8) If you need financial assistance. (9) How you been scammed and you want to recover you lost money. (10) if you want to stop your divorce. (11) if you want to divorce your husband. (12) if you want your wishes to be granted. (13) Pregnancy spell to conceive baby (14) Guarantee you win the troubling court cases & divorce no matter how what stage (15) Stop your marriage or relationship from breaking apart. (16) if you have any sickness like ( H I V ), (CANCER) or any sickness. once again make sure you contact him if you have any problem he will help you. his email address is (aisabulovespell@gmail.com) contact him immediately.

CHRIS ROSE

by Anonymousreply 39901/29/2014

I have a testimony to share,,My Name is Mrs Juliet am from the United State Of America am now 54years old Am a Medical doctor in California,I married for about 54years ago without any child then me and my husband go for an adoption of 2kids male/female.Last years something wonderful and gracious happened to me i came across this witch doctor in the internet that promise to help me get pregnant which i totally disagree,,,How can i be pregnant looking my age he ask me not to worry that he only specialize on pregnancy no other. That after the job has been completed there is no any side effect,that was how he told me what to do which i did, could you believe i miss my periodical time that same Month and i was pregnant.Today am now the happiest woman on Earth,,While am i testify to this site i know there are a lot of people that are in this kind of trouble some will decide to commit suicide. please just do and contact him for help make him to understand that Mrs Juliet from USA directed you, his email drogisospiritualhome@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 40002/15/2014

I can’t thank you enough Email: ekakaspelltemple@yahoo.com for all that you have done for me. About a year ago I my partner had a misunderstanding that lead to break up, we had both made BIG mistakes in our relationship. He ended up moving away from me to pursue a new life. I knew in my heart that he would be the only one to make me happy. I was relieved when I found your site and what you had to offer. I requested 3 to 4 day casting of the reunite us love spell and within 4days Denny company had relocated him back to our hometown where I still lived. We immediately reconnected and move in with each other i am so happy that i found you and i was all patient to following your order thank you Dr Ekaka. If you are in need of help i will advice you to contact him

by Anonymousreply 40102/18/2014

Lord Oddies cured my HIV disease I’m in deed very grateful for his kind work upon my life, I never thought I will be free from the disease,here i am today I’m no longer a HIV patient. I’m so happy,get your healing from him contact him via lordoddiesworld@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 40202/19/2014

I've always suspected a loved one has BPD. After watching OP's video- yeah. Turn the volume off or you'll feel suicidal.

Yuck! BPDs are always attracted to me b/c I'm a giver.

I always thought this person had Aspergers and maybe they do but- the part about them being emotionally = to children, puts it all into perspective. The video sealed it.

I've already detached to avoid the dysfunctional drama. I'm grateful to be healthy but about to have a panic attack.

by Anonymousreply 40302/19/2014

my name is Sharon i do not know how to say this to the world.my husband who left me for the past 2years is back to me asking forgiveness from me.all this happen with the help of Dr EFE a powerful spell caster.for that 2years my husband left me i was not myself anymore i feel like this life has come to end for me.all this happen to me because i love he so much i will do anything just to have he back.everything i do to have he back will not work is like each time i try to have he back the far he go from me.i was hopeless.one day i saw a testimony of Becky say how Dr EFE brought back his ex lover. i did believe her as time goes on i keep on seeing more testimony about Dr EFE.and i said to myself it will be for my bast if i contact this man. i contact dr EFE at efespelltemple@gmail.com in 2days time my husband was back to me. thank you so much DR EFE for what you have done for me. if you need help in your Marriage contact efespelltemple@gmail.com or call his cell phone +2348106985072

by Anonymousreply 40403/16/2014

Hello!

I am Elizabeth, i want to thank 'orikiolodumarespelltemple@gmail.com' for the very great spell he caste on my husband that makes him to come back to me immediately. We have been married for 9 years and we were blessed with three kids, my husband left us unjust-fully and was lost in a beauty of a woman, a woman who can't even withstand me and was staying with her, and left me and the kids all alone in the house and never care for us. each time I called him, he always insult and used me down on phone, until i met a friend of mine who introduce me to (Orikiolodumarespelltemple@gmail.com) and he assured me that my husband will be back to me within three days really after that given time I heard someone knocking at my door and find out it was my husband, pleading and dropping out tears begging for forgiveness, I accepted and we are now one, now i will advice everyone who are in this condition to contact him for your own solution at : Orikiolodumarespelltemple@gmail.com ..... he will help you and bring your sorrowful life to happiness.

CONTACT HIM THROUGH Orikiolodumarespelltemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 40503/24/2014

[quote]Yuck! BPDs are always attracted to me b/c I'm a giver.

Nah, it's because you're an idiot-frau. Yuck!

by Anonymousreply 40603/24/2014

I am Rebecka from USA, I promise to share this testimony all over the world once my husband return back to me, and today with all due respect i want to thank DR EKPEN for bringing joy and happiness to my relationship and my family. I want to inform you all that there is a spell caster that is real and genuine. I never believed in any of these things until i loosed my husband I required help until i found ekpenlovetemple@gmail.com a great spell caster, And he cast a love spell for me, and he assured me that I will get my husband back in two days after the spell has been cast. two days later, my phone rang, and so shockingly, it was my boyfriend who has not called me for past 3 years now, and made an apology for the heart break, and told me that he is ready to be my back bone till the rest of his life with me. DR EKPEN released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. As I’m writing this testimony right now I’m the most happiest girl on earth and me and my fiance is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up. So that’s why I promised to share my testimony all over the universe.All thanks goes to DR EKPEN for the excessive work that he has done for me. Below is the email address in situation you are undergoing a heart break, and I assure you that as he has done mine for me, he will definitely help you too. ekpenlovetemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 40704/01/2014

This is a thread that needs to be purged.

by Anonymousreply 40804/02/2014

Oh my God, I'm so glad to tell everyone the real thing that happen to me...My name is EMILIANO BABARAH. If i refuse to share this testimony it means i am selfish to my self and to people i love so much whom might have similar problems, March 16th about something 7:23pm after taken our dinner my husband got crazy started calling a lady name Melisa I love you, i was so mad and started crying like a baby...then my husband left home for the idiot called Melisa, and never return back home then i believed when he uthen nderstand his self he will surly come back to apology, but instead he left me So i complained to my friend she told me she was having such problems in her marriage until she was introduce to DR ORIOMON who specializes in bringing back broken homes and broken marriages DR ORIOMON cast a spell for me in May 4th surprisingly my husband came home May 6th apologizing that i should forgive him that it will never happen again, i was so glad and gave the thanks to DR ORIOMON who save my marriage, if you are having similar problem you can contact him and His email address is (oriomonspiritualtemple@yahoo.com) you can still save your marriage if u really love your husband.

Thanks EMILIANO BABARAH_USA

by Anonymousreply 40904/05/2014

I'm Mary from Florida. My husband left me for no reason on 24th of June 2013. He moved in with another woman, I felt like killing myself. I've tried different spell casters and went to different churches to pray but all to no avail. My life was very bitter and sorrowful. Then one day, a friend of mine told me about a prophet that is very good and does not even charge for his services, he said he gave him some lucky numbers that he played in a lottery and he won 5 fives consecutively. I didn't believe it because I've worked with so many of them and it didn't work. He begged me further so I decided to try this great Prophet called Dr. Rashid Tshuma. I contacted him and I gave him the necessary information. He didn't ask for anything but he said after the spell works, I can then voluntarily contribute to his orphanage home which I'm doing now with joy and happiness because I still didn't believe after he told me it will back until I used the spell he gave me and the next day which was on the 29th of July, 2013 I received a call and it was my darling husband Thomas. He apologized and came back to me crying for a second change and he even gave me 10,000USD as a means of compensating me on that very day before leaving. I'm now a very a happy woman and our marriage vows were renew again and ever since he has shown me love like never before. Thank you Prophet Rashid Tshuma, I will forever be grateful to you. You can reach him on his email:ultimatetemplesolutions@gmail.com, He can solve any problem you are facing now. Try him today and thank me later

by Anonymousreply 41004/07/2014

indeed the most powerful spell caster have ever experienced in life. Am Posting this to the Forum in case there is anyone who has similar problem and still looking for a way out. 1. To care HIV/AID or related illness 2. Bring back lost lover, even if lost for a long time 3. Remove bad spells from homes, business & customer attraction etc. 4. Get promotion you have desired for a long time at work or in your career. 5. Read all your problems before you even mention them to him 6. Remove the black spot that keeps on taking your money away 7. Find out why you are not progressing in life and the solution 8. Eliminate in family fights 9. Ensure excellent school grades even for children with mental disabilities 10. Stop your marriage or relationship from breaking apart 11. I destroy and can send back the Nikolos (water spirit, sleepless nite, up presses by wicked powers,) if requested 12. heal barrenness in women and disturbing menstruation 13. Get you marriage to the lover of your choice 14. Recover stolen property and whereabouts of people that hurt you. 15. Bring supernatural luck into 16. Pregnancy spell to conceive baby 17.Get your scam money back

you can reach him here or if Interested Persons should contact me via E-mail : drsambolatemple@outlook.com

Dr. Sambola

by Anonymousreply 41104/08/2014

It's simply amazing to me how many threads on BPD exist here, especially when 95% of people diagnosed with it are straight females. What's the deal? The gays love to invent drama, and embellish their own personal lives with perceived crisises, what?

by Anonymousreply 41205/01/2014

And you, dear genius, are here to clarify and bless us all with your knowledge. Patronizing meet condescending.

by Anonymousreply 41305/01/2014

No, not at all. I'm looking for help and support. A Google search brought me here. But it only took a second for me to realize this is just a bunch of craven drama queens making shit up to keep their lives full of conflict.

No offense.

by Anonymousreply 41405/01/2014

Oh my God, I'm so glad to tell everyone the real thing that happen to me...My name is EMILIANO BABARAH. If i refuse to share this testimony it means i am selfish to my self and to people i love so much whom might have similar problems, March 16th about something 7:23pm after taken our dinner my husband got crazy started calling a lady name Melisa I love you, i was so mad and started crying like a baby...then my husband left home for the idiot called Melisa, and never return back home then i believed when he uthen nderstand his self he will surly come back to apology, but instead he left me So i complained to my friend she told me she was having such problems in her marriage until she was introduce to DR ORIOMON who specializes in bringing back broken homes and broken marriages DR ORIOMON cast a spell for me in May 4th surprisingly my husband came home May 6th apologizing that i should forgive him that it will never happen again, i was so glad and gave the thanks to DR ORIOMON who save my marriage, if you are having similar problem you can contact him and His email address is (oriomonspiritualtemple@yahoo.com) you can still save your marriage if u really love your husband.

Thanks EMILIANO BABARAH_USA

by Anonymousreply 41505/05/2014

R414, as even a moron could tell at a glance, this is not a "help and support" website.

Go away and take your fucked up Borderline Personality Disorder with you.

TIA!

by Anonymousreply 41605/05/2014

Having been raised by a NPD and/or borderline ..often the best one can do is get out and stay out. Agree with [416]. Basically, they will take you down with them. Very complex to have family and/or intimate relationships. Leave them the fuck alone. You will not better them with kindness and understanding. And you will be worse for the wear.

by Anonymousreply 41705/05/2014

Just want to update you, that Luis came to my work today, he was amazing towards me, just wanted to hold me and kiss me, I don't know what you've done, but that was absolutely amazing, he was all over me, I want to thank you so much for that, you are my angel send from God. I don't know what to say, that was amazing, I have never seen him like that. He just wanted to hold me and kiss me. I thank God everyday for knowing you and having you in my life. I promise to tell whole world about your good work. Ancientfathersandmothers@gmail.com That is the email to get to this kind man Dr. Lee again it is: Ancientfathersandmothers@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 41805/07/2014

Oh my God, I'm so glad to tell everyone the real thing that happen to me...My name is EMILIANO BABARAH. If i refuse to share this testimony it means i am selfish to my self and to people i love so much whom might have similar problems, March 16th about something 7:23pm after taken our dinner my husband got crazy started calling a lady name Melisa I love you, i was so mad and started crying like a baby...then my husband left home for the idiot called Melisa, and never return back home then i believed when he uthen nderstand his self he will surly come back to apology, but instead he left me So i complained to my friend she told me she was having such problems in her marriage until she was introduce to DR ORIOMON who specializes in bringing back broken homes and broken marriages DR ORIOMON cast a spell for me in May 4th surprisingly my husband came home May 6th apologizing that i should forgive him that it will never happen again, i was so glad and gave the thanks to DR ORIOMON who save my marriage, if you are having similar problem you can contact him and His email address is (oriomonspiritualtemple@yahoo.com) you can still save your marriage if u really love your husband.

Thanks EMILIANO BABARAH_USA

by Anonymousreply 41905/22/2014

My life is back!!! After 8 years of marriage, my husband left me and left me with our three kids. I felt like my life was about to end, and was falling apart. I contacted Dr. OKORO LOVE SPELL and after I explained my problem, In just 3 days my husband came back to us and show me and my kids much love and apologize for all the pain he have bring to the family. We solved our issues, and we are even happier more than ever before Dr. OKORO you are the best spell caster. I really appreciate the love spell you cast for me to get the man back to my life i will keep sharing more testimonies to people about your good work. Thank you once again Dr. OKORO. You can also contact Dr. OKORO via email address: dr.okorospelltemple01@gmail.com in case you are in any problem you can contact this man for help he is always there in his temple to help you solve your problem Contact Email is: dr.okorospelltemple01@gmail.com CONTACT HIM TODAY VIA THIS EMAIL ADDRESS: dr.okorospelltemple01@gmail.com AS HIS POWERS ARE SO STRONG AND VERY EFFECTIVE AND HAS NO BAD EFFECT INSTEAD IT HAVE A VERY GOOD RESULT AFTER CASTING THE SPELL.

Dr. OKORO NUMBER: +2348053209149 Contact Dr. OKORO Via email: dr.okorospelltemple01@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 42006/07/2014

Am very happy to tell every one to hear my testimony will say. am Gloribel Stancy from united state,am a nurse,this story of my love life.I have been married for 4years and on the fifth year of my marriage, another woman had to take my lover away from me and my husband left me and the kids and we have suffered for 2years until i met a post where this man Dr. Ehi have helped someone and i decided to give him a try to help me bring my lover back home and believe me i just send my picture to him and that of my husband and after 48hours as he have told me, i saw a car drove into the house and behold it was my husband and he have come to me and the kids and that is why i am happy to make every one of you in similar to met with this man and have your lover back to your self.You can contact him with this email address {drudebhuluspelltemple@yahoo.com} or {drudebhuluspelltemple@gmail.com} or you can still call him on his mobile +2349038669448 Thank you Dr Ehi. I am sure he will do same to help you too.

by Anonymousreply 42106/20/2014

This us just a spam thread now. Why hasn't it been deleted?

by Anonymousreply 42206/21/2014

There's an argument to be made that 'Borderlines' are just feminine sociopaths, as 'Narcissists' are just masculine ones.

by Anonymousreply 42306/21/2014

Hi My name is 'Bruno Rico' just want to share my experience with the world on how i got my love back and saved my marriage... I was married for 7years with 2kids and we lived happily until things started getting ugly and we had fights and arguments almost every time... it got worse at a point that she filed for divorce... I tried my best to make her change her mind & stay with me cause i loved her with all my heart and didn't want to loose her but everything just didn't work out... she moved out of the house and still went ahead to file for divorce... I pleaded and tried everything but still nothing worked. The breakthrough came when someone introduced me to this wonderful, great spell caster who eventually helped me out... I have never been a fan of things like this but just decided to try reluctantly cause I was desperate and left with no choice... He did special prayers and used roots and herbs... Within 7 days she called me and was sorry for all the emotional trauma she had cost me, moved back to the house and we continue to live happily, the kids are happy too and we are expecting our third child. I have introduced him to a lot of couples with problems across the world and they have had good news... Just thought I should share my experience cause I strongly believe someone out there need's it... You can email him via eromosalspiritualtemple@gmail.com Don't give up just yet, the different between 'Ordinary' & 'Extra-Ordinary' is the 'Extra' so make extra effort to save your marriage/relationship if it's truly worth it.

by Anonymousreply 42406/27/2014

I never believed in love spells or magic until I met this spell caster once when i went to see my friend in Indian this year on a business summit. I meant a man who's name is Dr ATILA he is really powerful and could help cast spells to bring back one's gone, lost, misbehaving lover and magic money spell or spell for a good job or luck spell .I'm now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 5 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 3years. I really loved him, but his mother was against us and he had no good paying job. So when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him. At first i was undecided,skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try. And in 7 days when i returned to Canada, my boyfriend (now husband) called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married. I didn't believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do. Well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid, and my husband also got the new job and our lives became much better. His email is atilahealinghome@yahoo.com

by Anonymousreply 42506/28/2014

My name is Dirce Ries from Illinois in USA. Am here to testify of a great and powerful spell caster named Priest Kuvuki via his email: (Kuvukispelltemple@hotmail.com). I was so confused and devastated when my boy friend left me for another girl. I needed him back desperately because i loved him so much. So i contacted this great spell caster for a help. He helped me cast a return love spell on him and just within 12 to 16 hours my boy friend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. I want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to a love break up. Simply contact the great Priest Kuvuki via his email address ( Kuvukispelltemple@hotmail.com ) If you are out there and you can find this testimony do not hesitate to contact him because he cast spells for different purposes such as;

(1) If you want your ex back. (2) if you always have bad dreams. (3) You want to be promoted in your office. (4) You want women/ men to run after you. (5) If you want a child. (6) You want to be rich (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever. (8) If you need financial assistance. (9) Herbal care (10) Help get people out of jail (11) Marriage Spells (12) The Miracle spells (13) The beauty spells (14) CHARM PROPHECY (15) The Spell of Attraction (16) Evil Eye Spells (17) Kissing Spell (18) Remove Spells disease (19) Lottery spells

Contact Priest Kuvuki via his e-mail address; Kuvukispelltemple@hotmail.com

by Anonymousreply 42607/22/2014

My name is Dirce Ries from Illinois in USA. Am here to testify of a great and powerful spell caster named Priest Kuvuki via his email: (Kuvukispelltemple@hotmail.com). I was so confused and devastated when my boy friend left me for another girl. I needed him back desperately because i loved him so much. So i contacted this great spell caster for a help. He helped me cast a return love spell on him and just within 12 to 16 hours my boy friend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. I want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to a love break up. Simply contact the great Priest Kuvuki via his email address ( Kuvukispelltemple@hotmail.com )

by Anonymousreply 42707/24/2014

My name is Lorna Harron, and I base in USA...My life is back!!! After 2 years of Broken marriage, my husband left me with two kids . I felt like my life was about to end i almost committed suicide, i was emotionally down for a very long time. Thanks to a spell caster called Dr momodo, which i met online. On one faithful day, as I was browsing through the internet,I came across allot of testimonies about this particular spell caster. Some people testified that he brought their Ex lover back, some testified that he restores womb,cure cancer,and other sickness, some testified that he can cast a spell to stop divorce and so on. i also come across one particular testimony,it was about a woman called Sonia,she testified about how he brought back her Ex lover in less than 2 days, and at the end of her testimony she dropped Dr momodo's e-mail address. After reading all these,I decided to give it a try. I contacted him via email and explained my problem to him. In just 48hours, my husband came back to me. We solved our issues, and we are even happier than before Dr momodo, is really a gifted man and i will not stop publishing him because he is a wonderful man... If you have a problem and you are looking for a real and genuine spell caster to solve all your problems for you. Try Highmomodospelltemple@gmail.com anytime, he might be the answer to your problems. Here's his contact:momodospelltemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 42808/02/2014

One of the comments is just so,so Hurtfull! Saying "They F Up The Psyc. Ward And Should Stay Out Of Your Hospital!" That's a lot of why "WE" which I "HAVE BPD" and "3 Other Diagn. Illnesses!" It is hard enough for Us to deal with this and then You Get "Ignorant Knucle Heads" that instead of Supporting they add to the problems! HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF COMPASSION AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE? MAY YOU WERE SLEEP WHEN THIS WAS EXPLAINED! JUST REMEMBER, THIS COULD ONE DAY COME KNOCKING AT YOUR DOOR!

by Anonymousreply 42910/29/2014

I just want to share my experience with the entire world on how i got my husband back and saved my marriage… I was married for 5 years with 2 kids and i have been living happily with my family until things started getting ugly with me and my husband that leds us to fights and arguments almost every time… it got worse at a point that my husband filed for divorce… I tried my best to make him change his mind & stay with me cause i loved him with all my heart and didn't want to loose my husband but everything just didn't work out… He moved out of the house and still went ahead to file for divorce… I pleaded and tried everything but still nothing worked. The breakthrough came when someone introduced me to this wonderful, great spell caster called PRIEST OYANYAN from the oyanyantemple@gmail.com. Who eventually helped me out… I have never been a fan of things like this but just decided to try it because I was desperate and left with no choice… He did the spell for me and things really work out as he promise and my husband have a change of mind and come back home to stay with me and the kids. And promise never to hurt me again. we are living happily as it was with the help of Piest Oyanyaan. If you are in need of help you can contact Priest Oyanyan via email oyanyantemple@gmail.com or call him on his mobile number +2348155244493. He is here to help good luck.

by Anonymousreply 43011/10/2014

Priest Kukuvi v Priest Oyanyan, bitches!!

by Anonymousreply 43111/10/2014

My name is Lee Marie from UK am 30 years old i got married at the age of 24 i have only Two child and i was living happily .After five year of my marriage my husband behavior became so strange and i don’t really understand what was going on, he packed out of the house to another woman i love him so much that i never dream’s of losing him, i try my possible best to make sure that my husband get back to me but all to no avail, i cry and cry seeking for help, i discussed it with my best friend Allix and she promise to help me. She told me of a man called DR SADUMA, she told me he is a very great man and a real man that can be trusted and there is nothing concerning love issues he cannot solve and she told me how he has help countless number of people in restoring their relationship. I was really convince, I quickly contacted his email address at sadumalovespellhome@gmail.com . I explain all my problem to him, he told me that i should not worry that all my problems will be solved immediately. He told me what to do to get my husband back and i did, he said after 3days my husband will come back to me and start begging, and it really happen as he said, i was very surprise, this is so amazing. To God be the glory our relationship is now very tight and we both live happily again. If you having similar problem, Contact him now(sadumalovespellhome@gmail.com) and get your problem solve once and for all. i am a living testimony to it. 1) If you want your ex back. (2) if you always have bad dreams. (3) You want to be promoted in your office. (4) You want women/men to run after you. (5) If you want a child. (6) You want to be rich. (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever. (8) If you need financial assistance. (9)if you want to stop your divorce. (10)if you want to divorce your husband. (11)if you want your wishes to be granted. and his Email Address; sadumalovespellhome@gmail.com contact him immediately.

by Anonymousreply 43211/17/2014

Me and my husband have been trying for a baby for over three years now, We were going to a fertility clinic for about 8 months before somebody told us to contact this spell caster who is so powerful, We contacted him at this email arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com I copied the email and I sent him a mail he replied me and I told me all my sorrow is over, but after three years of trying we were at a point where we were willing to try anything. And I'm glad we came to Dr Dahiru, Because his pregnancy spell cast put us at ease, and I honestly believe him, and his gods really helped us as well, I am thankful for all he has done, he then told me that I should wipe my tears with such comforting words he told me to buy some items that his going to use to cast the pregnancy spell I did and he made the spell for me and told me when next I meet with my husband I we conceive,at first I thought it was a scam but I just followed my inner mind and I sent the money for him to buy all the items after some months I went to check with my doctor and I was 4weeks pregnant, thanks to Dr Dahiru spell temple,I want to use this medium to tell everyone having similar problem. contact him via email: arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com if you are trying to get a baby or want your lover back. he has powers to do it, he has done mine,

by Anonymousreply 43311/27/2014

Good day.Compliments of the season to you all out there.. I am so full with joy as i write this post right now.. i really have had an encounted with a real spell caster who is so true with is word and he does what he says he will do. He is the realest of all spell casters out there.. so genuiue and true. I want to thank High priest ozigididon for all he had done for me within the short time i met him.. he has really made my end of year a memorable one and has made me know that there is still hope. Thank you once again for bring back my lost love and making my life sweet and better.. I am so happy for the divine turn around he brought to my life. friends out there.. search no further for fake and scam spell caster, the real one is highpriestoziigididon@gmail.com and his name is High priest ozigididon, Contact him today and share your problems with him and i am so optimistic there will be a solution to that problem when been brought to High priest ozigididon. highpriestozigididon@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 43412/05/2014

// Whatever //

by Anonymousreply 43512/05/2014

I am so fucking sick of seeing this thread title. I didn't know it was all spam posts now. There's two good reasons right there to delete it.

Webmaster, HELLO!

by Anonymousreply 43612/05/2014

A couple of weeks ago I was in a dark period in my life, the man I love had gone off with someone else, that was when I was told about this Dr Lababa. Well he told me he could see that we would get back together that gave me hope, and he was right, because this week we have moved in with each other and we are so happy. A big thank you Dr Lababa. If you are in need of an angel please get in touch with my Dr Lababa via email: lababasolutiontemple@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 43712/10/2014

Spam trainwreck. Lol that its the borderline thread.

by Anonymousreply 43812/10/2014

Hello, my name is Miss faith, I'm from USA. I want to inform you all that there is a spell caster that is genuine and real. I never really believed in any of these things but when I was losing Garvin, I needed help and somewhere to turn badly. I found consultant.odia spells and i ordered a LOVE SPELL. Several days later, my phone rang. Garvin was his old self again and wanted to come back to me! Not only come back, the spell caster opened him up to how much I loved and needed him. Spell Casting isn't brainwashing, but they opened his eyes to how much we have to share together. I recommend anyone who is in my old situation to try it. It will bring you a wonderful surprises as well as your lover back to you. The way things were meant to be." you can contact the spell caster on ogbonispelitemple@hotmail.com he's very nice and great.

by Anonymousreply 43912/13/2014

Miss Faith, you and your "friends" are cunts.

You ruined a good thread with your spam-a-lam-a-ding-dong.

by Anonymousreply 44012/14/2014

DR ALAO: it is time for you to kill yourself now. The feds are soon to be at your door. All is lost.

by Anonymousreply 44112/14/2014

BPD sufferers are highly manipulative, so it does not surprise me the OP would want to spin this to make herself look sympathetic.

by Anonymousreply 44212/14/2014

I am Miss Lucy Hollywood!

by Anonymousreply 44312/14/2014

all of this "spell caster" garbage is a bunch of bull. It sounds like everyone was watching an episode of "Bewitched."

by Anonymousreply 44412/14/2014

It's still got a lot of useful info in it, if you skip the last couple of pages.

I suppose "psychics" think that anyone gullible / forgiving enough to hook up with a BPDer would be an easy touch.

by Anonymousreply 44512/15/2014

THE GREAT Dr.NICE OKSE WHO BROUGHT MY HUSBAND BACK TO ME . My name is Ananbel Samson I live in USA, . My husband and I have been living a very happy and lovely life. So as time went on, I began to notice this strange attitude that he was possessing. He was now having another girl friend called Jane, to the extent that he was no longer picking up my calls, and he was not even sleeping in my house anymore because of this new girl friend. I became confused and didn't know what to do . So i became worried and stranded, , because I have never experienced a thing like this before in my life. So I decided to visit a spell caster online, to see if he can help me out. So immediately I went to the internet, where I saw an amazing testimony of a spell caster who brought someone's ex lover back Dr. NICE OKSE so I email him with his email professionallovespell@hotmail.com immediately and I explained to him all my problems and immediately he reply to me that it will be very easy for him to solve, i have been helping people with situation like the one i have. And he also gave me some proof to be really sure of his work, and he assured me that my husband will come back to me immediately he is through with the spell casting. And also he told me to put all my trust in him, and I really believe him. So it was 9:00 am on the next morning, when I was about going to work, when i received my husband's call, and he told me that he was coming back home , and he apologized to me, and told me that he is very sorry for the pain that he has cost me. And after some minutes later, he really came back home, and that was how we continued our marriage with lots of love and happiness again, and our love was now stronger than how it were before. And he also told me that once my heart desire has been granted unto me that i should go and testify of his work right here on the internet. Right now I am the happiest woman on earth today as I am writing this testimony, and I want to really thank " Dr. NICE OKSE " for bringing back my husband, and for bringing joy and love to my life. My advice for you out there who your husband or your wife is acting strange or behaving the same way like this, or you have any problem with your relationship or anything related to do with spell casting, is for you to go and visit this VIA email: (professionallovespell@hotmail.com) and i assure you that he will be of help to you, and I am 90% sure that he will solve it out. Thank Dr. NICE OKSE.

by Anonymousreply 44601/09/2015

I want to share a testimony on how a spell caster (OGUN LOVE SPELL IS THE BEST) helped me in getting my EX lover back, I was married to him in 2005, ever since then I was living happily with him, but everything changed when I was unable bare him a child, so last year January I was sent out packing from his home, I went out from his house, I was in great pain, I looked worried, coz I loved him so much, I told my friend about whats going on, she introduced me to the great spell caster (ogun love spell), she gave me his email, I emailed him, he asked me to buy some items faithfully I did all he asked of me. He told me not to bother, that Im going to bear him children immediately he comes back to me, two days later my Husband came with his friends and started begging for forgiveness, and asked me to come back home, I forgive him, I went back to him, luckily I was pregnant, here I am today am now a mother, I gave birth to a set of twins, a boy and a girl, and we are living happily, DR.OGUN thank you very much, if you are passing through any hardship and you are looking for break through kindly email Dr ogun on ogunlovespelltemple@gmail.com and greatsolomonalter@outlook.com

by Anonymousreply 44701/15/2015

you all are a bunch of fucked up insensitive arrogant Douche bags,you wonder why we don't open up and continue to cause pain onto others, because its clear as day to me and it always has. it says above People with borderline personality disorder empathize to the point of pain, so it's not that they never cared and they don't necessarily have to be overly empathetic to develop borderline personality disorder . one just has to be able to empathize like an average person and be exposed to a highly abusive environment like i have to develop this disorder. i'm 25 now I've been going therapy for 20 fucking years trying to cope with 13 years of physical and sexual abuse and have been fighting chronic thoughts of suicide and tried 15 times ending my {painful}(due to abuse), {isolated}(due to depression), {meaningless}life (if all your experience is abuse and listening to a fucking shrink try to figure out and tell me what the hell is wrong with my mind because of someone else s twisted need to dominate and physically you, your life means nothing) death is a friend i'd gladly invite into my life but i think i'll stick around and bring him upon the doors of the stupid people who say or post rude insensitive and ignorant comments on topics such as this when they have the information right in front of their ugly face.

by Anonymousreply 44802/02/2015

!!! How To Get Your husband Back & Avoid Divorce !!!

At last my happiness has been restored by a Man named Dr Ukaka ,, my name is Lisa Buckley I want every one on this site or forum to join me thank this Dr Ukaka for what he just did for me and my kids. my story goes like this I was married to my husband for 5 years we were living happily together for this years and not until he traveled to Italy for a business trip where he met this prostitute who be witched he to hate me and the kids and love her only so when my husband came back from the trip he said he does not want to see me and my kids again so he drove us out of the house and he was now going to Italy for to see that other woman. so I and my kids were now so frustrated and I was just staying with my mum and I was not be treating good because my mama got married to another man when my after my daddy death so the man she got married to was not treating I and my kids well so I was so confuse and I was searching for a way to get my husband back to me and my kids so one day as I was browsing on my computer I saw a testimony about this MAN Dr Ukaka of freedomlovespell@hotmail.com shared on the internet by a lady and it impress me too so I also think of give it a try at first a was scared by when I think of what me and my kids are passing through so I contact him and he told me to stay calm for just two days that my husband shall be restored to me and to my best surprise I received a call from my husband on the second day asking after the kids and I called Dr Ukaka and he said your problems are solved my child so this was how I get my family back after a long stress of brake up by an evil lady so with all this help from Dr ukaka of freedomlovespell@hotmail.com I want you all on this forum to join me to say a huge thanks to Dr ukaka and I will also advice for any one in such or similar problems or any kind of problems should also contact him for help.website address: freedomlovespelltemple.yolasite.com

by Anonymousreply 44903/04/2015

Can a symptom of bpd that is striking back at someone who she thinks has done her wrong, be breaking things on purpose, steals, spreads malicious gossip? I'm dealing with almost everything in this post (from the family perspective), and I don't know what I should do. I've been accused of some terrible things through the years and there is no convincing this person that I did not do the things I'm being accused of. Thanks!

by Anonymousreply 45003/10/2015

Am here to testify what this great spell caster done for me. i never believe in spell casting, until when i was tempted to try it. i and my husband have been having a lot of problem living together, he will always not make me happy because he has fallen in love with another lady outside our relationship, i tried my best to make sure that my husband leave this woman but the more i talk to him the more he makes me feel sad, so my marriage is now leading to divorce because he no longer gives me attention. so with all this pain and agony, i decided to contact this spell caster to see if things can work out between me and my husband again. this spell caster who was a woman told me that my husband is really under a great spell that he has been charm by some magic, so she told me that she was going to make all things normal back. she did the spell on my husband and after 5 days my husband changed completely he even apologize with the way he treated me that he was not him self, i really thank this woman her name is Dr OZE she have bring back my husband back to me i want you all to contact her who are having any problem related to marriage issue and relationship problem she will solve it for you. her email is ozeafricalovesspell@gmail.com she is a woman and she is great. wish you good time. He cast spells for different purposes like (1) If you want your ex back. (2) if you always have bad dream (3) You want to be promoted in your office. (4) You want women/men to run after you. (5) If you want a child. (6) You want to be rich. (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever. (8) If you need financial assistance. (9) HIV/AIDS CURE Contact him today on: ozeafricalovespell@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 45104/04/2015

What a miss/fail!!! A person with BPD is NOT empathetic. The appear to be because they may seem to be affected or interested in other's emotions or circumstances. However, they filter everything in relation to how it affects them and their skewed views of self. Regardless of the so called "empathy", the filter is ALWAYS me, me, me and distorts the result. When a BPD shows "compassion" is because how it makes them feel and it has nothing to do with the other person; nothing! Even concern for others is purely another selfish act.

by Anonymousreply 45204/14/2015

I will like to share my testimony to you all.i just got married to my husband about a year ago we start having problems at home like we stop sleeping on the same bed, fighting about little things he always comes home late at night, drinking too much and sleeping with other women out side.i have never love any man in my life except him.he is the father of my children and I don't want to loose him because we have worked so hard together to become what we are and have today.few month ago he now decided to live me and the kid, being a single mother can be hard sometimes and so I have nobody to turn to and I was heart broken.i called my mom and explain every thing to her, my mother told me about Dr Jatto how he helped her solve the problem between her and my dad I was surprise about it because they have been without each other for three and a half years and it was like a miracle how they came back to each other.i was directed to Dr Jatto and explain everything to him, so he promise me not to worry that he will cast a spell and make things come back to how we where so much in love again and that it was another female spirit that was controlling my husband.he told me that my problem will be solved within two days if I believe I said OK.So he cast a spell for me and after two days my love came back asking me to forgive him.i Am so happy now. so that why I decided to share my experience with every body that have such problem contact him email. drjattosplltemple@gmail.com or call him on his number 09035512062.

1. GETTING YOUR EX LOVER BACK. 2. WINNING LOTTERIES. 3. CHILD BEARING. 4. BREAKING OF GENERATION COURSE. 5. GETTING OF JOB. 6. JOB PROMOTION. 7. MONEY SPELL. 8. SPIRITUAL PROTECTION. 9. HERBAL CARE. 10. BEAUTY SPELL.

by Anonymousreply 45304/19/2015

Thanks to Dr. IBUDU for saving my marriage!!! My names are Mary Hanson, I have been married to my Husband for 7 years, we have 2 kids together and our marriage was wonderful.Am very happy to tell every one my testimony Am sherry from united states,am a nurse, this story of my love life. Another woman had to take my lover away from me and my husband left me and the kids and we have suffered for 2years until i met a post where this man called Dr. IBUDU have helped many people and i decided to give him a reply on his Email if he can help me bring my lover back home and he ask me some information which i send to him and that of my husband and after 48hours as he have told me, i saw a car drove into the house and behold it was my husband and he have come to me and the kids crying and begging for forgiveness and that is why i am happy today He also set my friend free from HIV Dr. IBUDU really make the woman i am today for any one looking for how to get his or her ex back or any problem you are having i advice you Dr. IBUDU is the solution to all problem .You can contact him with this email address: tinalovespell@yahoo.com or call him on: +2348078467513

by Anonymousreply 45404/21/2015

My boyfriend of two years left me for another girl because I accuse him of seeing another girl and since then i have been trying to get him but he refuse to come back to me, he was not responding to my call or email and he even unfriend me on face-book and he told me that he is done with me. i was searching on the internet for help and i saw a testimony of how a spell caster help them to get their ex back so i decided to give it a try and i contacted him and i explain my problems to him and he cast a love spell for me and guarantee me of 3days that my ex will come back to me and to my greatest surprise the third day a great miracle fell on me and my ex come back to me on the third day and he beg me for forgiveness greatoririobaspellhome@gmail.com i will continue to publish his name because he is my Savior and we are happily married now. If you need him to help you Email greatoririobaspellhome@gmail.com

by Anonymousreply 45504/23/2015

I never believed in love spells or magic until I met this spell caster Great Oriri which a friend of mine told me about on (greatoririobaspellhome@gmail.com) he is really powerful and could help cast spells to bring back one’s gone, lost, misbehaving lover and magic money spell or spell for a good job or luck spell .I’m now happy & a living testimony because the man I wanted to marry left me 3 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down because our relationship has been on for 3 years. I really loved him, but his family was against us and he had no good paying job. So when I met this spell caster, I told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him. At first I was undecided, skeptical and doubtful, but I just gave it a try. And in 8 days when I returned to Canada, my boyfriend (now my husband) called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married. I didn't believe it because the spell caster only asked for my name and my boy friends name and all I wanted him to do. Well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid, and my husband also got the new job and our lives became much better. His email is greatoririobaspellhome@gmail.com; you can also contact him for help. I wish you good luck

by Anonymousreply 45604/24/2015

Apologies to the trolls for trying to put the thread back on track...

A family member has a history of suicide attempts, failed relationships, mood swings, etc. At least two doctors have given her a BPD diagnosis but she resists it because of its "stigma." Some in the family think she is just "manipulative"; she thinks she's just the victim of bad circumstances.

I'm aware of (although I don't really understand) Dialectical Behavioral Therapy ("DPT"), which is used to treat BPD. She has done it before and claimed to master it, but in the intervening years her behavior, etc. have been on a downswing.

I'm curious whether anyone with a BPD person in his/her life has any experience or thoughts about DPT -- is it effective at least in managing the symptoms?

by Anonymousreply 45704/24/2015

Hello my name is TRACIA let me testify to the general public how i got cured by Dr ERAH healing spell from (HERPES), I have been diagnosed of HAPATITIS B (HERPES) for good 8 years and I was almost going to the end of my life due to the constant pain, especially in my knees.all I have in my mind is let me just give up because life was no longer interested to me any more but I just pray for God every day to accept my soul when ever I die, luckily to me my kid sister ran to me that she found a doctor in the internet who can cure (HAPATITIS C HERPES,CANCER,And HIV/AIDS )she helped me out on everything, the great Dr ERAH only ask for my picture, so he can cast a spell on me from his temple.. after two days I started getting more stronger my blood started flowing normally i started experiencing changes all over me as the great Dr ERAH assured me that i have been cured,after some time i went to my doctor to confirmed if i have be finally healed behold it was TRUE, if you have HAPATITIS B HERPES CANCER HIV/AIDS any kind of illness i advice you all to contact him on erahspellhome@outlook.com or call +2348133618827

by Anonymousreply 45804/26/2015

Your quote "When the highly sensitive person grows up in a very non-validating and/or abusive environment, with a history of trauma, BPD can manifest.

In order for borderline personality to develop, an invalidating environment with and a highly sensitive person MUST BE present."

This is not true. Our experience: We have 3 children all raised in nothing but supportive nothing but validating household. 2 of our children are well established and very successful. The third as you have already guessed has a borderline personality. We seen signs of this personality in her since the time she was an infant. Even if experts have not figured it out yet this is a genetic problem they are born with that can get worse or better depending on the individual personality and their environment.

by Anonymousreply 45905/11/2015

R10 I bet you love making children cry

by Anonymousreply 46005/11/2015

I fell into a relationship with woman with BPD..the timeline & stages fit the medical literature exactly..first The Seducer, then The Clinger & then The Hater....what all these commentors need to understand, there are differences among BPDers...they all have a core personality they are born with, & can have co-existing personalities. For example, a very passive, loving person who developes BPD does have a 'good heart'..but a social path that developes can 'be evil'. I know her story, as she was molested then raped while getting treatment..since she never got the needed help she went through life..unfortunately, her kids could not help, but she had co-abused female cousin who she trusted, who I now found out, has actually munipulated her for her own issues, perpetuating her male abusive relationship. So now I am the demon because I 'called her out on it' & brought it to my girlfriend & kids attention. I tried so hard & told her I would never give up, but now I am putting my self in legal jeopardy, so I have to give up....so now the cycle continues, as now in her mind I abandoned her.

by Anonymousreply 46105/20/2015

BPD IS CURABLE and they can be loved. i loved a BPD patient when i was trying to help, He was good enough to trust. At first every effort to help him turn opposite. BPD's DO have feelings...that change by the moment, and they're understandably wrapped up in self-protection throughout their lives. They are in survival mode, and may WANT to be better, but just don't cut it. So they make victims of trusting hearts and Even though people with BPD sometimes act evil, they are not evil. More than likely, they're beautiful people on the inside. I look for ways to help Charles because i believe i can stand by him. God help me find Dr Osobase, i read how Dr osobase had cure different persons of BPD, Hepatitis B, HIV/AIDs CANCER and BIPOLAR, so i have to contact him immediately with osobasesolutiontemple@hotmail.com and osobasesolutiontemple@gmail.com and tell him my problems, Though i have never contact online Doctor before, i just have to trust Dr Osobase because of what i read about him. Dr Osobase told me what to do and did all just for Charles despite the stress just with in seven days that i provide the items he ask from me but Thanks to Dr osobase who help cure Charles behavior change and stop over reacting to things, have self control and try to know me better. Thanks to Dr Osobase for the healing and favour to get a new home. we are happily married now after two years. contact osobasesolutiontemple@hotmail.com and osobasesolutiontemple@gmail.com or call him with +2347053161489 to help you solve your problems in marriage, health and relationship

by Anonymousreply 46205/20/2015

BPD IS CURABLE and they can be loved. i loved a BPD patient when i was trying to help, He was good enough to trust. At first every effort to help him turn opposite. BPD's DO have feelings...that change by the moment, and they're understandably wrapped up in self-protection throughout their lives. They are in survival mode, and may WANT to be better, but just don't cut it. So they make victims of trusting hearts and Even though people with BPD sometimes act evil, they are not evil. More than likely, they're beautiful people on the inside. I look for ways to help Charles because i believe i can stand by him. God help me find Dr Osobase, i read how Dr osobase had cure different persons of BPD, Hepatitis B, HIV/AIDs CANCER and BIPOLAR, so i have to contact him immediately with osobasesolutiontemple@hotmail.com and osobasesolutiontemple@gmail.com and tell him my problems, Though i have never contact online Doctor before, i just have to trust Dr Osobase because of what i read about him. Dr Osobase told me what to do and did all just for Charles despite the stress just with in seven days that i provide the items he ask from me but Thanks to Dr osobase who help cure Charles behavior change and stop over reacting to things, have self control and try to know me better. Thanks to Dr Osobase for the healing and favour to get a new home. we are happily married now after two years. contact osobasesolutiontemple@hotmail.com and osobasesolutiontemple@gmail.com or call him with +2347053161489 to help you solve your problems in marriage, health and relationship

by Anonymousreply 46305/20/2015

What the hell has this thread become... Webmaster, delete please

by Anonymousreply 46405/21/2015

DOn't delete this thread. It has great info. Just delete the weird posts related to healings and spell castings.

by Anonymousreply 46505/21/2015

Just ignore witchiepoo

by Anonymousreply 46605/21/2015

Dr. Lee, I just wanted to thank you for all your help and efforts with my situation with Garrett. As you know, he broke up with me a few weeks ago and I found you and asked for your help. I had you cast a return my ex-boyfriend love spell on our behalf and I have to tell you that I am very pleased with the final outcome! I'm happy to say, we are back together again after a few short weeks apart! I was so miserable without him in my life. You have made me so happy! I am ordering a binding love spell right now via Ancientfatherandmothers@gmail.com to make sure we don't split up again. Thank you for all your hard work and attention to my serious problem http://ancientfathersandmothers.webs.com

by Anonymousreply 46705/23/2015

Dr. Lee, I just wanted to thank you for all your help and efforts with my situation with Garrett. As you know, he broke up with me a few weeks ago and I found you and asked for your help. I had you cast a return my ex-boyfriend love spell on our behalf and I have to tell you that I am very pleased with the final outcome! I'm happy to say, we are back together again after a few short weeks apart! I was so miserable without him in my life. You have made me so happy! I am ordering a binding love spell right now via Ancientfatherandmothers@gmail.com to make sure we don't split up again. Thank you for all your hard work and attention to my serious problem http://ancientfathersandmothers.webs.com

by Anonymousreply 46805/23/2015

This thread (despite the trolling and spell bullshit) has been very helpful- and I never in a million years would have thought any of this would have ever applied to me. Just left my BPD girlfriend- and I feel free. That is the only way to describe it. I have deep empathy for her- and those suffering from this disorder, but I have to put myself- my family and friends first. Thank god that nightmare is over.

by Anonymousreply 46905/23/2015

Lmao was this thread a trip.

by Anonymousreply 47006/16/2015

Lmao. "Slap a haloperidol patch on and the borderline is almost tolerable" Sad but true

by Anonymousreply 47109/02/2016
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