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Bottoms without boners

Why even bother?

by Anonymousreply 11008/19/2014

I've wondered about this. Some guys are hard and come when they bottom (within a good experience) while others never do, regardless of performance. Completely limp. Do they really enjoy it (bar medical problems)?

by Anonymousreply 308/31/2010

I want to make a donation but I can%C3%82%C2%B4t decide between "Doctors Without Borders" or "Bottoms Without Boners"

by Anonymousreply 608/31/2010

Bottoms that leak a lot of precum are even hotter than hard bottoms.

by Anonymousreply 708/31/2010

My 25 y/o FB always gets a hard-on when I fuck him and he always comes, even if it's the 3rd , 4th or 5th time he's come in 24 hours. In fact, he's always hard even before I start to fuck him just out of sheer horniness. Ahh youth!

by Anonymousreply 1508/31/2010

A flaccid bottom is also a sloppy hole. With a hard on, everything is tighter and the muscles are firmer. Turgidity has its benefits. With a raging hard-on, a thick cock pistoning the monk in the cave and a clenched hole muscle, honey, ride me hard and put me away wet!

by Anonymousreply 1708/31/2010

I always assume my tricks have severe drug problems when they can't get hard and need a bump.

by Anonymousreply 2009/01/2010

r18 = hot dog down hallway who needs a spank to tighten the gaping maw.

by Anonymousreply 2109/01/2010

No, r17 is a tight hole, hard cock bottom. You are confusing me with r18, the limp drippy dick.

by Anonymousreply 2309/01/2010

R11, you think of yourself as a top, but you can't properly fuck?

by Anonymousreply 2409/01/2010

This thread is really bringing out DL's eloquence.

by Anonymousreply 2509/01/2010

As long as his hole is tight and wet, I'm happy. What else do you need?

by Anonymousreply 2609/01/2010

Thanks Op, I've been looking for a name for my band for months.

by Anonymousreply 2809/01/2010


by Anonymousreply 2908/06/2012

Personally, I find it hot.

by Anonymousreply 3208/06/2012

I can't help but get hard as a rock when I'm getting boned - so hard I can't even touch my cock much until I'm ready to shoot because it pushes me over the edge so easily.

by Anonymousreply 3308/06/2012

I like it when the top is so aggressive, he DEMANDS that I am soft at all times.

by Anonymousreply 3408/06/2012

The only thing worse than a bottom without a boner is a boner without a bottom.

by Anonymousreply 3808/07/2012

[quote]If you don't stay hard when you fuck or get fucked you're simply not turned on by the guy. If you are you would.

IKR? The above explains why guys who fuck women can't be gay, only bisexual.

by Anonymousreply 3908/07/2012

[quote]The above explains why guys who fuck women can't be gay, only bisexual.

Well duh????

If a guy has sex with women by definition he's not homosexual.

Homo means "man"

by Anonymousreply 4208/07/2012

Uh, no r42. Homo means "same."

by Anonymousreply 4308/07/2012

In my youth, when I bottomed a lot, I was always had a boner, but I couldn't cum while being fucked. As much as anyone tried, it just wouldn't happen. After my buddy had finished, he'd jerk me off, or I'd finish myself off. The timing sucked, but the sex was hot.

Then I met a guy who loved giving blow jobs... fantastic blow jobs... No problemo.

by Anonymousreply 4408/07/2012

I actually WANT to stay soft. When I'm hard I usually cum, then it hurts to be fucked. I really don't care anything about being hard or not or even cumming (like that). Any ideas on what I can do to eliminate erections?

by Anonymousreply 4508/16/2012

I'm serious. I want to know if there's a trick to not getting hard.

by Anonymousreply 4708/17/2012

Would it be weird if I said that I actually get turned on by flaccid bottoms? I think it's a dominance thing. I really get off on seeing the contrast of my big hard dick next to their little flaccid one. Leaves no room for doubt about who the top is and who the bottom is.

by Anonymousreply 4808/17/2012

R4, I also knew a guy once who had no interest in me paying any attention to his dick. He just wanted to get fucked and was damn good at it.

by Anonymousreply 4908/17/2012

Why bother? Well, of course, it's more exciting to get fucked while your cock is rock hard, but it can still be pleasurable. I can come without a hard on.

by Anonymousreply 5008/17/2012

Try getting fucked without a prostate and see what happens.

by Anonymousreply 5311/11/2012

Speaking from experience, R53?

by Anonymousreply 5411/11/2012

[54}: Yes, it was surgically removed in November 2007 and I'm not the woman I used to be!

by Anonymousreply 5511/11/2012

Dear r53, would you please elaborate what your life is like now, post prostate cancer? I'm 50, was a power bottom, and all signs (enlarged, high PSA result) and symptoms are pointing to a prostate cancer diagnosis.

Am getting a CT scan and biopsy next week. I've had so much fun with my prostate for many years, but would prefer to live without it if it takes my symptoms away.

Can you also describe any symptoms prior to your diagnosis?

Yeah, I know. I should google it.

by Anonymousreply 5611/12/2012

I get fucked without a really hard boner. I love the guy filling me up and making me submit.

by Anonymousreply 5711/12/2012

[56}: Had an elevated PSA summer of 2007, then a biopsy and several of the random tissues samples came back positive for cancer. Urologist who did the biopsy (a former, married love of mine) forgot to prescribed Cipro (a necessity!) and I almost died from a septic infection.

Shopped around for various approaches: seeding, radiation, radical surgery. I chose the last one which was done with nerve-sparing. No complications. What they don't tell you is that you'll lose about an inch of dick length. It happens when surgeon detaches the urethra from the bladder and then reconnects it. My surgeon said he "stretched" my dick on the operating table, but I still ended up with a smaller dick. It will happen even if you choose the robotic procedure.

I can masturbate and have a thunderous orgasm but no ejaculate any more. Cock never gets fully hard even while jerking off. I choose not to take a steady diet of Viagra. Perhaps that would help with the lack for firmness.

I got fucked the other night and felt nothing other than pain from the latex condom rubbing against my anal opening. No matter how much lube you use, latex can cause tears in the mucosa. And at 65, I have an old asshole, but no hemorrhoids.

Good luck with whatever course of treatment you choose. Your sex life will not be the same anymore.

by Anonymousreply 5811/12/2012

Thanks for sharing, r58. I need to know the truth. Am "only" 50.

It's been a fun ride; I would just like to be able to pee again.

I used to cum hands-free with screaming orgasms while bottoming. Fortunately, there are other pleasures in life.

by Anonymousreply 5911/12/2012

Turns out I have a 6cm abscess growing right next door to Mr. Prostate. Am relieved that it is not ass cancer.

by Anonymousreply 6011/16/2012

Congrats, R60.

It's nice to hear some good news in relation to a scare like that.

by Anonymousreply 6211/17/2012

R61, I agree with you. My partner is fem and totally bottom. He isn't always soft, but he never pays attention to his dick and doesn't care for it if I do either. I have noticed that he gets into it more if he's soft, which is probably what has got me into it more. I'm beginning to suspect he's the one who's wanting to know how to STAY soft. If it's him, it doesn't look like anyone has really answered him yet. I know he enjoys being soft, and I enjoy him enjoying being soft, so I hope someone has a trick to it. This is why I think it's him. He mentioned cumming "that way". He has this thing where he orgasms, but it's not with his dick. I've never heard of such a thing in a guy. Anyone else experience this?

by Anonymousreply 6311/20/2012

I'm a 40yo masculine guy who lives in a rural state. Seems like everyone mistakes me for a top in the bars but I am all bottom, all the time since age 20 and have no desire to be versatile. Haven't even received a bj in 7-8 years even though I love giving them. I simply refuse to play with guys who aren't willing to do all the topping duties. Heck, I'd rather be celibate than be versatile.

That said, I HATE having my cock played with or sucked, and over years of getting fucked exclusively I've learned to enjoy it without playing with my own cock. I do get intense anal orgasms though, it's like my ass doesn't even need much lube I get so moist during a good pounding, and I can go for hours. I'd probably be a slut/power bottom but I don't live in the big city and have a variety of toys to keep me busy. I have been told by many hung, experienced guys that I am "amazing", lol. Have had a few marriage proposals but no one wants to move here and I make way too much money locally to leave (almost but not quite 7 figures). I also have managed to stay HIV negative due to being serially monogamous and being mostly safe in my younger years.

Yeah, I'm proud that my cock isn't a part of the equation during sex. I wear a jock strap so my partner doesn't get distracted by it. I am a master of douching and timing so my ass stays clean. I like really dominant guys and rough sex where the top can fuck as hard and long as he likes, and can take a it like a champ from the biggest dicks. I also learned to be an excellent deepthroater by necessity so am basically the real deal for "selfish" tops who dig masculine types.

I just recently met a guy who is into masculine total bottoms and loves to fuck so much he is actually moving out here to nowheresville just so we can fuck like crazed rabbits on crack and he never has to pretend to be vers or suck cock ever again. Yeah, he'll never have to work again since I make about 20 times his salary in the city and just want him to be my full time companion.

Total win/win situation every time we have sex. He gets a willing clean hole and I get a load or three of his DNA daily. Versatile guys will never have that...too busy arguing about who gets to do what to whom and when...

by Anonymousreply 6506/02/2013

I had a friend who joined Bottoms Without Boners, or was that Bottoms with Borders? Doctors Without Boners? Oh well, in any case, he did some of his best work with them.

by Anonymousreply 6606/02/2013

I've met many bottoms who stay flaccid and want no attention to be paid to their dicks. Passive total bottoms turn me on.

One hung bottom even kept a jockstrap on until he realized I had not even groped his dick over several fuck sessions. I have little interest in his cock. i guess he didn't want to be asked to top.

I've known bottoms who have hands-free anal orgasms and ejaculate with a limp dick. Fun all around.

by Anonymousreply 6806/02/2013

If my bottom can't get hard and stay hard, I end the relationship. Total turn off, wee Willie winkie just nubbing.

by Anonymousreply 6906/02/2013

I love (65)

by Anonymousreply 7106/02/2013

As a top they are usually a turn-off to me.

I'm the opposite of R70, when it comes to my career, I am NOT alpha or aggressive. At work, I am bossed around and not the other way around. I work in a field I don't care for and it frustrates me, so when it gets to the bedroom, I release all that frustration. Usually, I'm horniest right after work and I think that's when my frustration with work hits its peak. In the bedroom, that's when the alpha/agressive side of me come out. It's funny I tend to date guys that are alpha at work and totally submissive in the bedroom. I had an ex who everyone thought was the top (very dominant in his field of work), and that I was the bottom since I was more relaxed and easy-going. It turned me on knowing that they were wrong and I would soon dominate one of those alpha dudes at work that I hate and secretly think would be total bitches in bed. I can't beat them at work, but I dominate them in the bedroom and that makes me feel better about working for more powerful men.

I've had weird experiences with bottoms that don't get hard though. I can't help but feel they have major self-loathing issues. For example, I hooked up with this one guy who never got hard. After our first night together, I was disappointed because he never got hard and I thought that meant he didn't really like me. I thought he was out of m league, so I really liked him. Anyway, he contacts me again and again he doesn't get hard. I ask him why and he tells me he gets off without getting hard. I decided if that was the case then I would stop worrying about his lack of erections. After this, we were more open with each other and I started noticing different things about him. He would always refer to his ass as a pussy, which would turn me off. When I was fucking his gorgeous ass, I didn't want to hear him telling me how good I was fucking his pussy. Then, even though I never showed any interest in girls, he started talking about how I was bisexual and whether his pussy felt better than a woman's. He was so hot, I just went along with it. Never denying or confirming what he assumed. I also realized he liked to be treated like a bitch outside of the bedroom as well. He also told me about how he only dates straight or bisexual guys and never gay guys because gay guys aren't manly enough. I may like a bitch in the bedroom but not out of it. I ended up hooking up with two other bottoms without boners, and they had very similar issues about wishing they had pussies and were women and only hook up with "straight" guys. One of them didn't even think I was bi, he was convinced I was straight because I loved eating his "pussy" so much. There was a fourth guy that told me he didn't get hard or like to get hard because guys always wanted him to top when he was fully erect, and as a bottom he hated how some total tops became vers when they saw him hard. He was probably the only one that didn't freak me out. He referred to his ass as an ass, and didn't buy into the bi/straight shit guys rely on when it comes to casual encounters.

So as a top, I find them to be turn-off, but I overlook it for while cause sometimes I'll pull up with lots of bs as long as your ass is gorgeous and mine.

by Anonymousreply 7406/28/2013

I don't understand men who don't want to have their dicks played with/acknowledged. Whatever floats your boat but from my perspective it just seems fucked up. We are men, we have a penis, it's our sexual organ. I like topping but I could never be with a guy that didn't want me to have some fun with his dick.

I'm a gay dude, I like dick.

by Anonymousreply 7606/28/2013

I know, R76, right? He might as well be a girl.

by Anonymousreply 7706/28/2013

R76, what don't you understand?

You sound like a gay dude who is confident is his own skin. Bottoms and top that are insecure over their sexuality are typically the ones who fall for this shit.

by Anonymousreply 7806/28/2013

I have a bottom buddy who gets harder the rougher I treat him - pulling his hair, pushing his face down, smacking his ass, etc.

He's a big guy, too - probably 8, 8.5 - and I'm much smaller. For me that makes it much hotter - I can grab his cock and feel how much he loves getting fucked...

by Anonymousreply 7906/28/2013

Sometimes while getting fucked, I lose my erection. That doesn't necessarily mean it doesn't feel terrific inside.

by Anonymousreply 8006/28/2013

R81 Yeah well 100% of women wouldn't be here without them so they ain't all bad. Oh and is there a DL equivalent to Mary! for lesbins like Lester! Harry! or maybe Timmy! I'm asking for reasons unrelated to the post I'm quoting of course...

by Anonymousreply 8206/28/2013

Also this thread topic sounds like what would happen if they did charity porn parodies, how do you say bottoms without borners in French?

by Anonymousreply 8306/28/2013

"Sometimes while getting fucked, I lose my erection."

me 2

by Anonymousreply 8406/28/2013

This must be an east coast/west coast behavior.

Here in the flyover states tops and bottoms like to get hard and cum.

by Anonymousreply 8506/28/2013

I'm not sure why a "Top" would want his bottom's penis to stay limp or not touch it at all? I'm a top and I enjoy masturbating a man's penis while I give him anal sex.

by Anonymousreply 8706/28/2013

R81 so I guess it is true that women get orgasms from getting oral sex and not vaginal sex.

by Anonymousreply 8806/28/2013

R89 why do some gay men call their ass a "pussy", "man pussy", "man cunt" etc. yet sometimes they hate women, and I have also met a few gay men who told me they are not Trans but they said they wanted their penis changed into a vagina or castrated and completely removed and they are total botoms?

by Anonymousreply 9006/28/2013

R81 - google clitoris. Then you might understand why a women would get an orgasm from oral sex and not penetrative vaginal sex.

If you are a straight dude the next time you have vaginal sex with a woman - ask yourself why she is rubbing herself while you do her. It's not for your pleasure.

by Anonymousreply 9106/28/2013

I love R76 and agree 1000%.

by Anonymousreply 9206/28/2013

I agree about pussy envy but dont think it's nec about self loathing. My mate is also kind of a pussyboy, but it's just something that turns him on, like any fantasy or dirty talk. It turns me on too.

Yeah, I do think he gets jealous of girls' p-card (real and figurative), but that doesn't mean he hates himself. I get jealous of guys who make more money than me etc etc. Envy doesn't have to define a person.

by Anonymousreply 9306/29/2013

I just laughed out loud at R6

by Anonymousreply 9406/29/2013

I don't mind a limp dick, what I really hate is when I'm topping a zombie and suddenly his dick falls off.

by Anonymousreply 9506/29/2013

R81 some women claim they can get a g-spot orgasm from vaginal sex and that for them it's more pleasurable than a clitoral orgasm. Not all women are wired the same just like not all men are since there are men who are more into oral sex who aren't into bottoming or prostate stimulation at all.

by Anonymousreply 9606/29/2013

[quote]I don't understand men who don't want to have their dicks played with/acknowledged. Whatever floats your boat but from my perspective it just seems fucked up.

Someone in the anal orgasm thread said that having an anal orgasm is like getting your dick fucked from the inside. That is a brilliant and accurate description of how it feels to have your hole opened. It basically feels like you have a pussy. Even I know that and I love to top. I have a hard time getting stimulated in that way back there, Ive only had a handful of ass orgasms, so its just not for me. But thank God for whore bottoms that get them all the time.

So just because the bottom isn't getting his dick stimulated from the outside doesnt mean it's neglected.

by Anonymousreply 9907/26/2013

I am a bottom and as said above can go soft and hard depending on how my bf is doing me. yes sometimes it hurts but its usually because we are both in a bad position. whether hard or soft, I leak without any contact. I have too say I can't say which I prefer, cumming when soft or hard its a different feeling but both satisfying.

my bf likes to see me get hard and soft during longer sessions, he likes to do me missionary or with mirrors so he can see how my cock reacts especially if I am leaking alot.


by Anonymousreply 10008/16/2013

If you want to have sex without a boner, it beats being a top.

by Anonymousreply 10108/16/2013

I almost always go soft a few minutes after a guy enters me unless I keep wanking (or take a viagra thirty minutes before), but it doesn't change the pleasure I feel. Although there's nothing quite as pleasurable for me as being fucked, it does feel marginally better (but possibly its a'll psychological) if I stay hard. It seems to me tops like it more too, perhaps because I have 21cm cock and looking down on that all rock hard and bouncing up and down is a bit more carnal than looking at a limp one?

by Anonymousreply 10406/30/2014

Sorry, cut myself off, had to comment on (extremist) lesbian rubbish above about men not delivering orgasms to women; dicks being ugly, redundant, etc. I'm bi (versatile but much prefer being a bottom) and married I always use my fingers (easy) or the angling of my cock (difficult) to make my woman cum as I fuck her, unless she says she just wants it straight out animal and rough; that is; hard, dirty, dominant, without foreplay. Surprisingly enough, considering all the negative shit out there about straight men not delivering the goods, and oral sex being the only thing that gets women off, I've found that most women actually want minimal foreplay and hard "animal" fucking probably thirty to fifty percent of the time, but only after you've first established with them that you are prepared to give them a great orgasm 100% of the time if they want. After an "animal fuck" my wife usually masturbates using my cum as lube or I orally stimulate her as I stimulate her G-spot, then at the last minute finger her anus, when she goes off like the Eiffel Tower on New Year's Eve. She loves men, has no interest in women, thinks as I do that cocks are incredibly sexy and beautiful, and perhaps because she's amazing and because I rim and fuck her bum she has no problem understanding my need to go out and be fucked hard too, as a very submissive girl when I need to. She tells me that her vagina on its own feels very little pleasure nor does her anus, it's only when they are stimulated in unison with her clit and G-spot that all together they push her over the edge into a thunderous, very loud orgasm where she actually produces enough female ejaculate to soak the bed. Also I am one of those gender-conflicted guys who genuinely believes that their anus is a stand alone sex organ which transcends it's more utilitarian purpose, it is undeniably, a male "pussy" with it's own pathway to orgasm and also erogenous zones which are quite different from when I fuck a woman. Even my wife who often fucks me with a strap-on, says she wishes she could experience from either her pussy or her anus the paralysing spasms of pleasure I get from mine. She reckons bi men like me are extremely blessed to be able to get pleasure from both their genders, from both cock and pussy. A few parting comments about having a big cock: Of course few women are so shallow as to knock a guy back because of his small cock, but I've been with so many and know absolutely that the "size doesn't matter" story is one they reserve for nice guys with small cocks. Any woman who has experienced a big cock used properly, will forever after greatly prefer 8" to 5 or 6". Also 99% of straight or bi women in my experience simply can't get enough of sucking on extra big cocks. I'd had vaginal sex with about sixty women before I was married and I can't remember even one of them who also didn't constantly want to suck me off, to the point where it got boring. On top of those were another seven or so who only lasted one or two dates because they refused to let my big cock inside them, believing they were too small. However each of these insisted on giving me oral before heading on their way. So much for women finding the male penis unattractive. The one very real and damaging problem with a big cock is that I often felt like a real freak at a woman's reaction when she first lay eyes on it. That was partially what made me feel so much more comfortable sexually with gay and bi guys who tend to respond more moderately. But as a bottom for men, I'm not all that different myself, I love sucking big cocks, and the thicker the cock the better it feels inside me, but unless the guy is really good at it, any longer than 7" becomes too painful. Fortunately most guys who tell you they want to fuck you with their eight or nine inches usually turn out to be around seven. So although I'm a bit over 21cms myself, or close to 9" as measured from from tummy to tip, from my experience the ideal size for penetrative sex is; up the bum 6 to 7", and in the pussy 8"

by Anonymousreply 10506/30/2014

Most bottoms I know don't stay hard. A few want nothing to do with their dicks not even cum. Some precum a lot or cum hands freed while soft. They all enjoy the bumsex. The total sub bottoms are my preferred.

by Anonymousreply 10606/30/2014

I am a married totally bisexual male. A very eager bottom where mansex is concerned. Mid fifties. I can fuck my (female) wife very well and enjoy hetero sex with gusto. I also have a gay lover and we get togther when we can. He is in his seventies but he is super potent without Viag or ofher assistance other than my eagerly sucking mouth sometimes. He is even a repeat cummer. He and I are also in love. I would not want to give up either and both partners are happy with the triangle, although neither wants to be part of anything resembling a threesome. Fine with me.

When with a lady I am happy with hetero sex and when with my boyfriend I am like totally gay when we make love. . Sooo comfortable either way. I like pussy and also need my cock and cum.

I have loved getting fucked in my man pussy since my youth. I love sucking cock and love cum. I have always been an eager bottom and can have an orgasm if a man plays with my nipples and makes out while he is fucking me. But, while I might get a boner during foreplay, once he is inside me and the serous fucking starts and I get lost in giving my man pleasure and receiving pleasure form his cock, my own cock stays soft unless I am jacking while I get fucked, which I almost never do because its all about his cock and the magic it is working in my hungry pussy, stroking myself would just detract from the pleasure. Besides my hands are usually occupied caressing and touching him. Often they are occupied with a nice ass cheek in each hand, urging him deeper and helping him pound me mindless.

On occasion, after my man and I make love and we're cuddling up in the afterglow with my arms around him and my sweet over's nice bubble butt snuggled up against me, I feel myself getting firm and often if I have not ejaculated yet, I become inspired to fuck his sweet tight hot pussy too. Raging boner then! And that has been happening more often lately.

So, for me anyway, a softie while getting fucked is entirely normal and in no way indicative that the sex is not good. Sex is ALWAYS great with him.

by Anonymousreply 10708/19/2014

Sometimes, the stimulation in the rectum can be so strong that it keeps the bottom's penis from getting hard.

I think pre-cum is a better measurement of how much pleasure the bottom is getting from the kissing, the thrusting, etc.

by Anonymousreply 10908/19/2014

Maybe I'm weird but I always get hard when I'm getting fucked. I can cum hands free if the top is good.

Only one bf I had didn't get me hard when he fucked me but his technique was like a cross between a stray dog and a jackhammer. I'd get hard when we were cuddling or kissing but once he put it in I went limp because he just had no rhythm at all. He was trying too hard and we weren't connected.

If your bottom is not hard, he is not turned on and not enjoying it even if he tells you he is. He is just trying to spare your feelings. Try going a little slower, varying your rhythm, kissing him, switching positions, playing with his nipples a bit. Tell him how great it feels to be inside him. Sometimes just knowing I'm giving my man a lot of pleasure turns me on.

by Anonymousreply 11008/19/2014
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