Pete Davidson is Having a Baby

Is it human? Why does it look like a duck? 🦆

HE is with child?

Well, I'm not sure that was the best decision, given his future of emotional instability.

However, millions of non-famous, emotionally unstable people have kids every day, so...

Congratulations are in order, I guess.

His longest relationship was only two years. She better hope he doesn't lose all his money because that's the only reason to have a baby with this fuckup.

Will it be born with tattoos?

Hope they are both enjoying those boobs while they can.

Must be easy to do that when your dick taps the cervix.

Should we start a GoFundMe now for all the therapy that baby is going to need as he grows up with Pete as his dad?

Why would he have Pete as his dad?

Does he know who the father is?

He’s been systematically having his tattoos removed, now that he’s sober and realizes how hideous they are—it’s apparently very expensive, takes several sessions for removal, and quite painful.

He seems to be in a good place now, and probably should have waited a few more years before taking on fatherhood.

His forceful, public seizure of the waistband of Miss Hewitt's unmentionables makes him entirely unfit for fatherhood!

Ugh, that’s going to be one trashy baby.

I hope the mother has some type of talent because it’s certainly not getting any from his father.

Will the christening take place in a tattoo parlor?

This guy should thank his lucky stars Lorne Michaels took an inexplicable interest in him and gave him a huge national platform not commensurate with his negligible talent.

R16 = Kenan Thompson, an expert on this matter.

Were they able to fit the bong tube into her uterus? It’s never too early to start getting baked.

Anyone who has a child with an admitted Cluster B deserves what’s coming to them.

What a lovely way of showing how much she loves him!

The Davidsons are having a baby. There’s just one thing wrong…IT’S ALIVE!

Is deodorant an appropriate baby gift? Because that baby’s going to stink of booze, staff infections and b.o. like dad.

In which Waffle House rest room did the conception take place?

I remember Dorothy explaining why babies are born without chins on “The Golden Girls”, but that fetus is showing a real Jay Leno potential, bless it be.

I found the perfect gift for the Davidson baby shower.

Wow. ^^ Talk about the ultimate display of alcoholism.

The world does not need a kid from this moron.

OBGYN: “Get this baby on PrEP and penicillin, stat!”

He’s always said that he has a BIG dick and he knows how to use it.

[quote] He’s always said that he has a BIG dick and he knows how to use it.

Well, he certainly never said anything funny, that’s for sure.