My Husband is Cheating
He thinks he hates the Datalounge (why would you read that, why would you post anything there?) but for decades, he's been reaping all of the benefits.
He says, "Move it along, Toots" and if he doesn't believe something I said, he asks, "any verificatia?". We recently moved to a retirement community where a lot of women over 60 look like lesbians and many of them use canes. If he's certain that one is indeed lesbian, he'll say "she has caneface!".
Hi entire family uses "he looks like he just smelled fresh baked cookies" to describe someone they think is gay.
And so on.
Tonight while reading about the DNC, he said, "La Belle Hogg is now (co-chair or VP or something). Coming out of his French-Canadian mouth it sounds like "La Belle O-ague" which makes it even funnier.
It's not fair! I do all the gruntwork while he dismisses me then ends up using the lingo.
| by Anonymous | reply 28 | May 25, 2025 10:32 PM
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I'm sorry Miss, but with all due respect i have my own problems.
| by Anonymous | reply 2 | May 25, 2025 9:28 AM
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Sadly, you blew this one: "any verificatia?"
| by Anonymous | reply 3 | May 25, 2025 9:36 AM
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This thread is a failure.
| by Anonymous | reply 4 | May 25, 2025 9:59 AM
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OP tried, I'll give her that
| by Anonymous | reply 5 | May 25, 2025 10:21 AM
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Does he call you Poo Shoes and then threaten to kick you in the cunt bone and/or shit in your wig?
| by Anonymous | reply 6 | May 25, 2025 10:49 AM
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We’re going to decline a series order at this time.
| by Anonymous | reply 7 | May 25, 2025 10:54 AM
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I’ve never seen “caneface” here. Is that a thing?
| by Anonymous | reply 9 | May 25, 2025 12:36 PM
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What a bitch, viciously face-slap him
| by Anonymous | reply 10 | May 25, 2025 12:41 PM
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Memorial Day weekend isn’t an excuse to hit the vodka and meth
| by Anonymous | reply 11 | May 25, 2025 12:52 PM
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THEN WHAT THE FUCK IS????"
| by Anonymous | reply 12 | May 25, 2025 12:53 PM
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I know your husband. I told him that you'd enjoy all those mean things. He's got more planned. Wait until dinner!! I'm a real cunt, aren't I?
| by Anonymous | reply 13 | May 25, 2025 1:17 PM
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Call me when her brings up Darfur orphan
| by Anonymous | reply 14 | May 25, 2025 1:25 PM
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You ought to be wielding the shit bra before cupping your moobs with it.
| by Anonymous | reply 15 | May 25, 2025 1:40 PM
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I have an observation applicable to both of you.
| by Anonymous | reply 16 | May 25, 2025 1:41 PM
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Just tell him to stay the fuck away from me at Applebee's.
| by Anonymous | reply 17 | May 25, 2025 1:58 PM
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OP's husband is the Janet Troll.
| by Anonymous | reply 18 | May 25, 2025 1:58 PM
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I forget. Did he molest me?
| by Anonymous | reply 19 | May 25, 2025 2:10 PM
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Was he reading about La Belle Hogg whilst wearing earrings and a caftan and reclining atop his Vivian Vance duvet cover, OP?
| by Anonymous | reply 20 | May 25, 2025 2:26 PM
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Husbands die every day, Dolores. An accident is sometimes an unhappy elderfag’s best friend.
| by Anonymous | reply 21 | May 25, 2025 2:31 PM
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Your husbear sounds tedious.
| by Anonymous | reply 22 | May 25, 2025 2:31 PM
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You're BOTH whores, darlin'.
| by Anonymous | reply 23 | May 25, 2025 2:48 PM
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If your husband is acting suspicious, he's officially a susband.
| by Anonymous | reply 24 | May 25, 2025 3:20 PM
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This fabrication is so poorly constructed it makes me clutch my pearls. You failed DL 101 OP. Go back and repeat.
| by Anonymous | reply 25 | May 25, 2025 3:37 PM
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R9, yes. It goes back years. It’s about the phenomena of so many lesbians who use canes. Right after I saw the term here. I ran into a cane-using lesbian.
| by Anonymous | reply 26 | May 25, 2025 3:39 PM
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Does La Belle Hogg refer to his entire person or just, y’know…his hog?
| by Anonymous | reply 27 | May 25, 2025 7:00 PM
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I think that's endearing OP. He clearly finds some of the phrases funny and unique enough to use.
What's the harm? My ex was a fantastic guy, but he wasn't necessarily funny or could come up with quips quickly. I liked giving him some lines to use - and he liked having them.
| by Anonymous | reply 28 | May 25, 2025 10:32 PM
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