Ugly maga cunt, Kristi Noem, has her bag stolen in DC

I have known a few pretty wealthy people in my life.

None of them would carry that amount of cash around for no reason.

Thieves are shit human beings, but come on. Carrying $3,000 in cash in your handbag is just a stupid thing to do. That thief hit the jackpot.

Should pay more attention to her purse in the future instead of thinking of her next pro Trump commercials.

I hope the thief donates the cash to a puppy rescue.

For her coke dealer?

Have to wonder about drugs at that amount.

One needs some for emergencies like a taxi, hotel, etc. , but come on.

I hope the Homeland is more secure then her immediate vicinity!

Yeah, I'm thinking a coke deal was coming up. Also, a checkbook? I'm older than her and haven't used a check in years.

Good! Fuck that bitch.

Drivers license, medication, apartment keys, passport, DHS access badge, makeup bag, blank checks, and about $3,000 in cash??!!!

Who the hell carries those things on them all at once?

I wonder if she had any back-up hair extensions in her purse as well.

I'm sure it was planned. Those TV ads of hers make her even more unlikable and a target for haters.

Also her Signal Chat password

[quote]Drivers license, medication, apartment keys, passport, DHS access badge, makeup bag, blank checks, and about $3,000 in cash??!!!

Obviously the makeup bag was of utmost concern.

I’m surprised she wasn’t packing a pistol.

R8 She’s from South Dakota, they’re like 20 years behind.

That's her go bag. In case she needs to take that flight to Moscow (or El Salvador) on a short notice.

This is not just on her. Doesn't she have a security contingent that follows her around so if she leaves her bag behind in a public setting, or leaves it in a vehicle or wherever, they're supposed to notice these things?

Wait, don't tell me, DHS chose her security personnel on the basis of a loyalty oath and non-DEI criteria, not a demonstrated history of on-the-job competence.

Overnight bag for a coke orgy with Lewandowski?

She does not have an Apple tracker in her handbag?

Is she still a slut?

Has anyone seen xer lately?

Carrying 3K in cash. Who does that for legitimate reasons?

The thief was caught and cuffed. When questioned, he said it was an act of vengeance for his dead " brother."

She probably set this up herself so she can blame it on an immigrant.

His accomplice was caught and photographed with the evidence.

R22 Is that Matt Damon?

Retailers have immediately sprung into action and released a Kristi Noem product line around the incident.

Can't find her own ass with both hands.

stupid cunt

Close, r19/ElderLez. This is some scary shit. Gift link to WSJ article in the Bluesky link. I was wondering wher this snake had slithered. It looks like Lewandowski is the power behind the throne at DHS. He accompanies her everywhere and the position of Chief of Staff is unfilled. JFC.

Might Kristi be the next to go?

"The head of Homeland Security can't even secure her own purse?"

Did Pete get to take a turn before he started getting the boot?

An illegal did it! I will find you, I will deport you, and you will never come back.

From the DM:

Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem was carrying $3,000 in cash when her purse was stolen because she was planning to hand out the money to family as Easter gifts, she claims.

The so-called ICE Barbie was robbed while she was dining at Capital Burger in Washington DC, despite her Secret Service detail.

'Her entire family was in town including her children and grandchildren – she was using the withdrawal to treat her family to dinner, activities, and Easter gifts,' the spokesperson said of the wedge of cash now missing, Fox news reports.

After reviewing the restaurant's security footage, the Secret Service determined that Noem's bag was snatched by a white man in a medical mask before he exited the restaurant.

She didn't have $3k in cash - it's either an insurance limit or reimbursement limit she's gaming.

Who gives out cash on Easter? She's a grifter - and is trying to scam an insurance company.

Not very secure, Barbie.

White guy in a mask? Foreign agent OR, most likely, someone working for Trump who wants her phone and other info because they suspect something or want to find dirt.

My bet is that it was someone on Trump's team.

And they're going to use this lapse in security against her somehow. She's the fucking secretary of Homeland security!!

R38 She can’t even keep her purse with her beloved makeup secure.

There were 8 family members all taking pictures in the restaurant like regular old tourists. Kristi looks distracted here. No purse in sight.

$3k in cash? Was she about to buy two dozen eggs from a farmer’s market?

Dumb bitch

Corey likes lots of coke when he fucks so no question what the cash was for.

The Capital Burger - just look at the place - all sorts of sordid individuals and thieves would hang out here!

Like I said - it was somebody from Trump's team or the GOP that did this. White guy in a surgical mask - c'mon now.

Go back to North Dakota, MAGA Barbie.

It looks like a place tourists would go. And where tourists go, thieves follow.

R46 - that's like 50% of all restaurants in any major city's popular areas. Nah - it was the Trump team - they suspect something.

I wonder if they got her phone.

are her extensions intact?

and the Rolex? tell me they didn't get the Rolex.

Re: last month NYTimes At a Prison Appearance, a $50,000 Watch Stands Out

Kristi Noem’s trip to a prison in El Salvador drew social media attention for the homeland security secretary’s choice to wear a gold Rolex in such a setting.

The average per person meal ticket at the Capital Burger is $30. DHS said she had withdrawn $3,000 because she wanted to have enough money to treat the entire family to dinner.

There were 8 of them.

Eight people were going to eat 100 hamburgers?

[quote] Eight people were going to eat 100 hamburgers?

Amateurs

The whole story is crazy and clearly demands some creative explanations, but that's par for the course for MAGA.

They reporting her medications were in the bag, too. Gee - I wonder what meds this lunatic is on ?

$3K, pain meds, pocket-sized lube and some Ben Wa balls. I'd love to see the face of that thief after checking his "winnings." Wish they'd have YouTube videos of this, like unboxing.

The meds were probably Cory's Viagra and the $3K was for the room at the Hilton so she doesn't have to put it on the credit card

R47, I don't disagree with you but what do you think they suspect?

Here's why this is good news for Wendy Ho!

So she has no identification? Deport the bitch to El Salvador.

KKKristi is totally drugged up all the time. It's why she always speaks in a monotone. The $3K was for her drug dealer or her Mexican plastic surgeon giving her off market botox 💉.

Toldja I was hardcore!

Cricket’s revenge

KKKosplay KKristi Noem

I bet Corey beats the shit outta KKKristi and steals her money like Sharon Stone's junkie pimp in Casino.

Reddit comment:

"....to be fair, that government access card is probably now in safer hands."

$3K on her person? Is that all? Amateur.

Is it true her husband is closeted? I can’t recall the source but that’s what I gather.

Stupid thief! Took her BAG and left HER! Is this another set-up, like sTrumpet's "assassins"?

$3000 isn’t that weird. Could be for drugs, sure. But could be that she knew she’d need cash and took out about what she would need, plus a lot extra so she has a stash. That’s what I always do.

$3000 is very weird

Weird and old unless you are buying drugs, paying expensive whores or planning to flee the country.

People generally don't use cash anymore unless it's for illegal things. Or she was at a casino all afternoon and hit a jackpot.

This seems staged. Nobody conveniently has that much cash in a bag they leave unattended while it gets stolen.

She seems just as crazy as Nancy Mace who has also faked attacks.

They say it had her make-up in it, so it must have been like a duffel-size purse.

Someone needs to re-write the lyrics to Nina Simone's "Four Women" to fit the likes of: Kristi Noem, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Nancy Mace and Lauren Boebert.

The cash was the earnings from her second job as a truck stop lot lizard.

Maybe she was about to go on the run from her abusive boyfriend Corey. She had her passport in there as well.

Update

bummer....I was hoping for a DB Cooper

Apparently the guy may have been in the country illegally, sounds very suspicious.

NBC is reporting that he's illegal, as well as a second suspect involved but not yet arrested.

This sounds like a total set up.

I don’t believe a fucking word of this. MAGA loves to set up stunts. Remember Nancy Mace and her fake attacks? Her arm in a sling after a trans-woman shook her hand? Please. These gashes live for stunts.

Kristi Noem should be hooked up to a lie detector test and made to answer questions about this. I don’t believe a word that comes out of her cunting mouth.

The more this is in the media the more convinced I am this was staged for publicity and to further the anti-brown folk agenda.