I have over a decade of I wait it out to the end, a.k.a. age 67.
I’m so fucking sick & tired of these assholes, DL!
I’ve worked part time to full time jobs since I was 16 years old. Everyday, after school, I went to work in Englewood, N.J., on a store for an absolutely crazy, yet awesome Persian lady in order to save up for prom. Eventually, I moved to L.A., & continued working.
I have always had a job, as far back as I can recall. Like many, I’ve faced mental health challenges, due to being primarily raised by a mentally unwell mother, & a father who barely spoke English, however, I managed to eek out a little bit more for myself than a mere existence.
I’m PISSED.
I’m angry that men like Elon Musk view me as a mere number on the board of life. He claimed on national television, that he has NEVER done anything to hurt others, hence he doesn’t understand why vandals are fucking up his cars.
Well, guess what? Neither have I, done anything to hurt others, nor have MANY of us.
I’ve ALWAYS been the good one. I’ve ALWAYS taken the time to listen & learn. I have ALWAYS attempted to hear the other side of the story. I have ALWAYS given food, & at times shelter, to those who have less than me, which by the way, isn’t much, because I have never been wealthy, but whenever I see a need? I help. I give. I listen. I do my absolute best to understand & help. I’m ABSOLUTELY flawed AF, yet still manage to merely eke out even a semblance of dignity, for those who have less than I have. If it’s twenty bucks? I give it. If it’s a home cooked meal? I cook it & serve it. If it’s a couch for 3-6 months? I offer it. If it’s a ride to work? I pick you up & get you there.
I want to help you. I grew up in a situation where I barely received any love, or emotional love or empathy from others. I grew up in a family filled with many people, who “othered” me, because I genuinely enjoyed spending countless hours by myself, reading books, & absolutely anything I could get my hands on. I grew up in a family who LITERALLY, physically beat me, because I wanted to read & learn every single thing I could.
It’s Thursday, March 27, 2025, 6:04 am, PST. I’m still me. A poor person, who for the most part, am somewhat, no longer ashamed for being poor, and who almost has completely accepted that I’m not responsible for the way I was emotionally & physically abused as a kid.
It’s TOUGH. I swear to my bone marrow that I wake up every single fucking day, & do my best to shake it off & march/move on. I’m totally envious of people with decent parents. I ruminate on who & what I may have been, had my parents told me they loved me, even once.
Today? Here we all are, regardless of who abused us, or who loved us. We are all at the mercy of men & women who can fire massive amounts of people who REALLY need their jobs because they just signed their new and first mortgage. We are at the mercy of women who claim to have shot a helpless & innocent puppy & goat in the head. We are all at the mercy of persons, who for all intents & purposes, self admittedly, declare themselves to be sociopaths.
Please understand. I’m so much older now. I’m so much closer to the grave than most, & I’m finally genuinely assessing what really & actually matters. It completely breaks my fucking heart, that my country is fucking broken.