Tonight on Larry King: the death of JIMMY CARTER

Larry, I wash sho shtoned at Shtudio 54 for all of Carter'sh preshidenshy I don't remember musch. I do remember that Nell and I had the shame coke dealer, though.

President Carter was also known for his sense of humor, and his many catchphrases, such as DY-NO-MIIIITE!

I hit him with my hay-er! And i don’t mean the hay-er on my head! Did you know I invented mah-jong? And gum with that freshening goo!

I let him once-ah. Nice guy. He said, Mickey, you should have all the Oshcars!

I sang for him! I sang for him!

I slept with him! I was… a penis farmer. You know my laughter? She played Princess Leia!

That was Jimmy DEAN, KLG. The sausage guy!!!

Jimmy was MARVELOUS. He even let me smoke in the White House.

He helped me invent panty shields!!!

He slapped me during sex! At a Holiday Inn in Battlecreek!! Where the cereals are made!

Larry thank you for this tribute show-it means so much. My best to Shawn…

I understand we have Miss Lillian on the line.

David Gergen, do you think he knew he was dying when he handed the race over to Harris?

Tragedy just cannot escape the Carter family. After losing child star grandson just 2 years ago, the family has been embroiled in scandal. We have Jay-z’s nephew on the line to talk about the passing of the great icon and his rap star uncle’s current legal woes.

I called him on the phone back in '77.

Where am I?

I’m not crying tomight, Larry. Like my mother before him…you know, child abuse isn’t funny.”, Larry.

Who will take over The Tonight Show?

Dud he ever consider remarrying after Roslyn passed?

OMG! Cowboy Carter is dead?

LOVED his Liver Pills.

Strange when the youngest goes first. Still, I suppose if there's a bright side it's there's plenty of Osmonds left. After the break, Charo singing Paper Roses, live on the phone from Aaron Spelling's mansion!

On the phone is daughter Ali Larter. Ali did you inherit the elf chin from Mom or Dad?

“Our next caller is from Petaluma.”

Can you imagine Larry King interviewing Joe Biden?

[quote]Dud he ever consider remarrying after Roslyn passed?

Her name was ROSALYNN.

The producers of "Three's Company" briefly considered casting Jimmy to take Jennilee Harrison's place when she was preparing to leave the show, but they decided Priscilla Barnes looked better in hot pants.

He was my rival. And my friend.

But first a word from our sponsors, Garlique Barand Garlic Pills -- and when we come back Willy Carter, brother of the late CEO, will talk about his troubled life in the shadow of the preeminent manufacturer of children's onesies.

"Nell Carter on the line..."

Let's also remember his late wife Dixie, who had a huge hit with "The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia," their home state.

"On behalf of all Amewicans, I asked the new Pwesident-elect to 'Pwease be gentew with us,' duwing my fiwst pwime time inetewview in 1976. Then I intewviewed Babwa Stweizand for her new movie 'A Staw Is Bawn'. Two icons, intewviewed by me. Top that Lawwee. "

Jimmy, did you really mean it when you coined the phrase, "Fuck Iran"? Of course we all had the bumper sticker then but that doesn't make it right in 2020, does it? Can you pull the mic a little closer, sir?

Amy, were you surprised neither Ford nor Reagan has offered condolences for the man they ran against?

On the line from Huntington, West Virginia right now, Linda Lavin, who is appearing at the Underwood Deviled Ham Arena in “You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown.” Linda, what are the beaches like, and are any Carter’s children clothing stores still open in that neck of the woods?

Helena Bohnam Carter and former Blue Jay Joe Carter will join us tonight to Sind their rendition of The Peanut Man. Their father would be proud.

Stay put

[quote] He slapped me during sex! At a Holiday Inn in Battlecreek!! Where the cereals are made! —Betty Hutton

That Post made the thread.

Since Vice-President Mondale is also dead, is Tip O’Neil our new president?

And we'll be right back with Lauren Tewes, Andrea McArdle, Sally Struthers, John Schneider, Mindy Cohn and Mr T.

On the line we have the president's son and family spokesperson Carter Oosterhouse.

Charlie Daniels is on the line, “Charlie was the devil going to Georgia to look for president carter?”

Mr. Peanut will share his thoughts on the loss of his beloved friend.

After the break, Toni Tenille will be joining us with a musical tribute.

Back with Lorna Luft and her blockbuster claim that Jimmy Durante molested her with his nose!

It's a dishease, Larry.

At least he lived to see me win an Oscar. I'm sure that was very fulfilling for him.

Young singing sensation Aaron Carter, and now the aged former President Jimmy Carter.

Father Time does not discriminate.

Jammy! Jammy Carters come backs tubbee you jammy jam jam

Great show Larry-Liza never disappoints.

I can't remember which Carter son picked his nose on television during the big Carther walk to the Capitol.

Which of you brothers was it, Amy? It is still a family trait?

And we're back.

Our team has tracked down jimmy's daughter Lynda to chat with us. Lynda, of course, came to great fame playing Wonder Woman during her father's administration.

Lynda, welcome. Thanks for being with us tonight. Sorry about your loss.

Tell us, what is it about living in the White House that makes presidential offspring go into acting?

First, Steven Ford was an actor and then you became an actress. How did that come about?

And didn't you and Steve date for a time. How was Steve in bed?

With every Larry King thread I cannot resist retelling his interview with Debra Tate, Sharon’s sister. Roman Polanski extradition talk was in the news & Debra mentioned some conversation(s) she had had with Polanski. Prompting Larry to ask if she found it difficult to have a civil conversation with someone who had so brutally murdered her sister. “Roman Polanski didn’t murder my sister,” Debra exclaimed.

That is a classic, R51.

Next up on satellite feed we have the lovely first daughter, June Carter Cash, and her husband, the famous UFO investigator, er, Man in Black, Johnny Cash. June, Johnny...back in the seventies, when you both had your troubles with substance abuse, why didn't you stay with Jimmy and Rosalynn? What could a former first lady like Betty Ford offer you that the White House couldn't?

I LOVE these Larry King threads. He needs to interview Joe Biden and Harry Caray...or Dana Carvey as JB / Will Ferrell as HC but who would play Larry?

With the unexpected death of Jimmy Carter, many questions are left answered concerning the numerous lawsuits he faced in recent months. One example is the nasty paternity trial with Beyonce over custody of their daughter Blue Ivy Carter

Another lawsuit that is scheduled to go to trial very soon involved Jimmy and his children’s clothing line, Carters. This particular lawsuit blames Jimmy for discriminating against plus sized infants and toddlers by not being size inclusive.

After the break, we will talk with world famous attorneys Arnie Becker, Ally McBeal, and Al Sharpton about the fate of these cases.

Was he one of the Late Night show hosts?

I loved Carter's Little Pills.

I love you, r55.

That is gold.

Coming up after the break, Linda Lavin talks about her affair with Jimmy's brother Jacques Cartier!

What? Dead? OK. We'll talk to Linda Lavin about death! Coming up after a word from ProstateHealth!

Actually, whether they did it as Larry or not, this concept could be a massively funny SNL skit... a clueless host mashing up every celebrity death.

We have Billy Carter on the line to discuss Billy Beer...

You high fuckers at R53. the original queen Miss Maybelle Carter is right here on the party line too. She fixin to take this opportunity to rebrand her makeup line via a duet with the marvelous duckwalkin Chuck Berry, "Maybelline Mascara, Honey Is That You?" Back to the studio, Larry!

It's poignant indeed that Carter, whom we saw week after week saving lives in ER, couldn't finally save himself. Could he not have used a defoliation device on himself to cheat death? We'll be asking Rosemary Clooney's son George, who also gave his life to medicine, about this untimely tragedy...

We have Michael Caine on the line to discuss his role in "Get Carter." Mike, was it a challenge to play a presidential assassin?

Hi Larry it’s Kim Carnes, I don’t have a president Carter story but wanted to plug my New Year’s Eve show at Ada Jo’s all night swap meet in slaughtersville Oklahoma. See all my Carnies there!

Georgia?

Suze Orman up next, to talk about whether Jimmy Carter takes Jif down with him.

All the lust in Jimmy’s heart along with that government peanut butter he’d bring me every show simply proved Jimmy was a cheap asshole.

I cannot live on lust. I do not care for crunchy peanut butter. That was an unfuckable customer.

-Lesley Gore

What's that yappy grandson gonna do for attention now he's actually dead?

Delta Burke weighs in, next.

I'm told we have Mr. Carter's own dog here in the studio with us ... welcome Miss Peanut!

Callers, we are going to take a quick break with a word from one of our sponsors, Polygrip vaginal ointment.

'Caller, you're on the line.'

'Hey Larry, do you paint your bald spot?'

'What?'

'Do you PAINT YOUR BALD SPOT??'

Kim Richards, welcome. You campaigned for Carter in '76, that right?

Thas right Larry, and he won the prize cuz a meeee.

And you also got a lifetime supply of peanuts, too, that right?

Yeah! Mom thought he'd said peeenis though.

That's plenty a nuts.

Flags are at half-staff today for the late president and we'll honor his memory here with this brief video recalling the Carter years in office. Roll tape. Sorry folks we're back after obvious technical difficulties. WWE fighter Kayden Carter was not President of the United States, as far as I know.

Next we have Denzel Washington, who played the president's brother Rubin in "The Hurricane."

Up next, we have a very special guest, Jimmy's famous sister, Dixie, who went into acting just like his daughter, Lynda.

We'll get the scoop on why those Carter genes make people want to be in the public spotlight, be in acting or politics. And we'll also ask Dixie about her drunkard brother, Billy who also loved being in the spotlight with his commentaries about the world.

Most importantly, we;ll find out if Dixie has any six-packs of Billy Beer stashed away. Wonder what those six-packs would get on eBay?

All that after the break. Stay tuned for a commercial for Geritol, the juice of the Gods!

Also, we hear from other Designing Women, Annie Potts, Julia Duffy and Markie Post. The life and legacy of Dixie Carter, who died earlier today at the age of 300 degrees.

Plus, Nora Dunn, fetching star of sitcoms such as Dif’rent Strokes and Saved By the Bell. Norma, you worked with Julia Duffy on Saturday Night Live. Was there a conspiracy behind the scenes against fervent Carter supporter Mary Gross?

Tonight we have his niece, Lynda Carter.

Carter? That’s haaawt.

Next up we have Ina Garten, who served in the Carter administration as an advisor on nuclear energy policy and now has her own Food Network show called "Cooking with Count Basie". Ina, whenever Jimmy summoned you to the oval office, were you ever tempted to give him a blow job and how long should one roast a chicken?

Another favorite Larry King moment. This time courtesy of a guest, an unnaturally dark-haired, middle-aged, New Jersey woman whose brother had been killed by his daughter, the guest’s niece. As the investigation proceeded, the daughter/niece argued she had long been a victim of sexual abuse at the hands of the father/brother. Larry asked his guest if she was surprised by these allegations. “Shocked?” she responded , “I was de-vas-a-tated.”

Jammy Carter was a racist!

Nothing on DL makes me laugh as hard as the Larry King threads.

Maria makes me…laugh!

Let’s put a call through to England where the late president spent the 1990’s as lead singer in Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine! Is that you on the satellite phone Dusty? How about Petula Clark, wasn’t Downtown the jam back in the day?

"On the line, we have the legendary actor Al Holbrook. Al, will you be one of the pallbearers at your brother-in-law's funeral?"

Dr. Jill Biden, was President Carter ever under your care during his time in hospice?

I liked when Larry asked Jerry Seinfeld whether "Seinfeld" got cancelled by the network. Jerry was incredulous and showed a really unattractive, pompous side of himself.

Fun fact, for the last four years of his run, Dr. Jill Biden was Larry's executive producer and agent! I read on the internet, anyway.

[quote] Actually, whether they did it as Larry or not, this concept could be a massively funny SNL skit...

SNL is about as funny as Full House. No one watches it.