Has a fart ever made you instantly unattracted to a hot person?

Yes.

You’re being a Mary.

Ma'am this is an Arby's.

No, OP, 'train I'd feel the same way.

Most women don’t find farts funny.

"'train" ? No, I meant afraid!

Like the Puritan sampler from her 11th-great grandmother's own hand hanging on the OP's parlor wall says:

Start with a fart,

Shit on the dick.

Let’s get honest & real.

If this turns you off, you are not as attracted to this person as you think you are, or as much as you want him, or others believe you are.

Now, the above out of the way, here’s my experience regarding farting: there is no fart sound or smell conceived in the heavens or on the face of the earth that will turn me off *** IF *** I genuinely really like the guy.

Leave the guy alone. You’re not really into him & you’re wasting his time. You should be old enough to know how to handle these situations by now without any prodding from us.

Is it my imagination, or are there all of a sudden a lot of fart-themed posts here on DL?

I grew up in a house where farting out loud was a huge no no. It turns me off, though I’ve obviously been with guys who did it. In certain circumstances it would turn me off, though. It’s definitely not a turn on. I’d have to be with someone for awhile for farting, and then, I would want them to do it privately.

Farting in front of others is crude and disgusting.

You are the MARY!est MARY! that ever MARY!ed.

[quote] Is it my imagination, or are there all of a sudden a lot of fart-themed posts here on DL?

Probably some sad, fat fart troll fapping to them all.

Yes. Guy I was with farted just before i fingered him. Ruined the mood.

STEALTH SCAT THREAD!

Not so stealthy though, r15

Obviously, it’s a different story if you’re out with friends or at some professional event. And if someone does it constantly & repeatedly in front of you, it’s annoying.

But everyone will fart in front of their partner eventually. You can’t always hold it in, & sometimes, you have no idea it’s about to happen.

R14 total boner killer I agree

Omigod, OP, he passed gas, broke wind, he cut the cheese..he didn't kill someone. Unclench your pearls and get a sense of humor!

This is how I imagine OP:

OP, you’re upset because you’re now faced with the reality of seeing him as an actual person versus what you’ve built him up in your head as. Sometimes accidents happen. As long as he isn’t doing it on purpose to be crude, you need to get over it.

R21 OP here. I appreciate what you’re saying, he did it on purpose (I think he thought I’d find it hilarious).

Set the scene. Had you been drinking?

Being gay necessitates having full control of ones sphincter muscle. I was able to wink and blow kisses from my rosebud by the time I turned 19.

He farted while I was eating his asshole! I threw him out!

Not too be sniffed at, r25!

If you can't handle a fart, best to stay single forever.

Memo from Mary Central Control:

MARY!

Please feel free to reach us by email or phone. If you believe you received this MARY! designation in error, please fill out the attached form and mail back for review.

We’re Mary’s and we’re human-move on.

OP sharted 23.5 times while writing this disgusting story

Guys who take steroids and eat super high protein diets have /the worst/ smelling farts. They could clear a building.

STEALTH FLAT THREAD

R8 Love your advice. 100% agree.

Yes it has.

And people need to understand that it’s not something that can be overlooked in the early stages of a relationship. It can literally be a dealbreaker. I had a dude basically belch in my mouth once when we were kissing. I was done.

Lots of us are telling you that you are being a "Mary" or 'too Mary" or that your shouldn't be in a relationship if you can't handle a nasty fart. But some of us are grossed out too. Now that I think about it. I am a much more frequent farter than my husband. And my farts sometimes do stink. Wait. Tim, is this you?

I once issued wind at such prodigious volume as to concuss and propel back my partner. When examined, his facial hair was found to be singed.

Was it a wet muddy fart, OP? If not yes, you're a Mary.

Breaking the fart barrier is the real test of where a new relationship is going.

I hate ALL foul odors!

Yes.

The answer to both questions is yes.

I remember in middle school, when I was 12, I had a crush on this girl with a Jennifer Love Hewitt kind of girl. I thought she was so perfect.

We were in drama class. We were doing the play The Trial of Goldilocks. She was playing Goldilocks. I had brought in this little baby rocking chair which had a seat that opened up (so it served a dual function of chair and toy box), so she could use it as a prop as Baby Bear’s chair she was supposed to break.

So she was rehearsing the scene, she leaned over as the chair opened up (the chair “broke”) and she fell to the ground.

I was standing a few feet away from her. As she was getting off the ground, I heard this low fart noise.

I felt SO EMOTIONALLY WOUNDED. I felt so depressed. “No, that wasn’t what it sounded like, it had to have been something else! She’s too perfect for that!” But it really ruined my day for the rest of the day.

I wasn’t turned off by her so much as I was in denial.

R43, lol

There are different types of farts. Bad stinky farts and relatively clean benign ones.

ESTs make great stocking stuffers.

What an animal!

My EX boyfriend farted in his sleep one time. Thus why he's my ex--I ended our relationship the next day.

Did a little cum come out, R48? Is that how you found out he was unfaithful?

I only recently discovered that you can indeed light your farts on fire...not that I've tried.

I'd eat a yard of her shit just to see the hole her fart came out of.

Do you ever notice that your own farts….smell ok?

every human on the planet , past and present, with a functional digestive system farts.

If Ben Affleck can get over JLo shitting on him, you can get over a fart, OP.

"Remember a few years ago when Ben Affleck and Matt Damon were here shooting Project Greenlight?" (They had gone to Sundance to interview directors and writers and try and create a publicity stunt and an episode out of it.) "I was doing sound in the condo where they were both lodging and filming. At one point Ben took a break from shooting and disappeared upstairs to his bedroom. By mistake he left his wireless mic on."

"Jennifer Lopez was there with Ben, but was hiding out in his room the whole time. At first when I heard Ben kissing her hello, I immediately went to turn the volume down on my headphones. But then they started kissing loudly and making noises, and I felt so guilty, but I left the sound up, and heard Jennifer saying 'I love you baby, I love you... You wanna get busy, baby. You wanna get busy?'"

"Then I heard Ben reply, 'Are you sure you're feelin' better? I don't want you to sh!t on me again.'"

r53 True - but most people recognize the feeling of pressure preceding a gaseous event, and can excuse themselves to go somewhere where they can be private. Forgiveness is offered to people who didn't get any warning. But people who flaunt their flatulence must be shunned.

Was this an episode of Sex and the City?

Suzanne Summers claimed she hadn't farted in five years.

Miss Manners (the OG one, not the zombie one of today) wrote that there were some sounds that were so outside the realm of polite society that society basically decreed they don't exist. So if you hear a fart, etiquette demands that you did not.

R, OP . Isn't he gay too in regards to the MARY comment?

V

ROP

^^* someone is trying to send a coded message

According to my partner, it is ALWAYS the dogs.

Here’s my take: have manners. If you hike your leg like a dog and rip ass in front of me, I will never get over the grotesque and distorted view I will have of you going forward. I feel like some people are considerate and some are not. There’s something incredibly juvenile and repulsive about “making a scene” with a fart that just really disgusts me. I fart all the time, we all do. I just don’t power push my way through it, loudly as possible, and let the whole world know I’m farting. I just take some space to myself and do what I need to do, then return.

If I feel sick and I know it’s gonna smell, I leave the room.

[Quote]Suzanne Summers claimed she hadn't farted in five years.

[quote]R8: Let’s get honest & real. If this turns you off, you are not as attracted to this person as you think you are, or as much as you want him, or others believe you are.

I really don't see what all the fuss is about.

I just want to state that I would let my last ex fart all day long if he wanted to if I could have him again. Be careful what you wish for, OP.

A fart is just the beginning of what makes me fall even deeper in love.

Last Christmas you gave me your fart ...