Tasteful Friends, Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos present their upper east side townhouse

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Fuck the tour. I just wanna see her actually eat that plate of spaghetti.

That is the most tacky spaghetti eating room I've ever seen.

That plate of spaghetti would last her a year surely?

Annie Rexic Ripa is not fooling anyone with that plate of food.

If I was a celebrity, I'd never show photos of my home. Why give burglars, rapists, kidnappers, murderers, nutcases a layout of the house and show them every nook and cranny so the can better plan their crimes.

They're both anorexic!

It's quite nice. Wouldn't change anything.

I agree. It’s a beautiful home.

She looks like Kristen Bell in that picture.

It’s fucking perfect. Great.

I have absolutely nothing to snark on here. It might be the most beautiful home I’ve ever seen.

what is that giant black thing behind them? is it art?

It says a lot about Ripa that Regis never spoke to her again after his final show.

Regis was pissed off because he was never asked to appear on the show after he "retired".

Having Kelly hold a plate of pasta was a bad choice. We know she's afraid of eating so it makes the rest of the pictures seem really fake and lifeless. They look like a completely fake couple living a fake life.

I like the simple master bedroom with the view of the trees. Everything else looks like an expensive hotel suite. I say that as someone who loves Art Deco.

The house is fine, but it is standard-rich-people fine. There’s no real personal character to it. If you instructed any good interior designer that you wanted “tasteful” (albeit with way too much in the way of dark wood furnishings), this is what they would give you.

I admire the self-discipline these people have: their bodies are amazing. However, they are paying the price of it in their faces which have a gaunt, unnatural look, from either over-dieting or surgery.

She has such a hard, brittle appearance.

I bet the bathroom reeks of vomit.

Funny that they went on and on about their "snack closet," but never opened it up to show what's inside.

I'm guessing it holds two cashews, two jellybeans, and two long swizzle sticks.

If you turn the volume off and skip forward continuously, the video at r1 is almost bearable.

R16 Mark is beginning to resemble Fire Marshall Bill.

They moved from Soho to East 76th to be closer to ABC studio in West 60s, which is moving to Hudson Square near the Holland Tunnel. Maybe they'll move back to Soho.

[quote]It says a lot about Ripa that Regis never spoke to her again after his final show.

Regis lived across the street from the studio, he walked across half hour to showtime and got ready. They never spoke until they were seated live on the air. Why the fuck should she talk to him after he left? Do you talk to everyone you ever worked with after the job? He was in his 80's, she was in her 30's what the hell would they talk about?

The eye "art" was just creepy. The entire house feels dull, which is disappointing considering it's Studio Sofield—they usually do such great work.

Overly entitled couple shows off how rich they are. This kind of stuff is so 5 minutes ago. Besides, Mark has no goddamned lips.

R25 See R21

She has worn out old lady voice.

R27 And Kelly's voice isn't so great, either.

The episode of Broad City where she played herself made me a fan for life.

R29 This made me a fan for life:

Mark knows farrrrr tooooooo much about all the small details in that house. Is he....well you know???????

R23 People think show co-hosts are friends in real life. They think the same of actors who play friends.

It's not about being friends, it's about having gratitude for the man who helped give you your big break. Kathie Lee had that gratitude. Kelly doesn't. She's a mean girl who never grew up.

This is why she's slumming it with her D List actor husband. No one else wants that gig.

[quote]It's not about being friends, it's about having gratitude for the man who helped give you your big break. Kathie Lee had that gratitude. Kelly doesn't

Dude, Regis was out of it by the end, Kelly kept him presentable on screen. HE should have had the gratitude.

Who here would blow Mark though?

R35 - Mark is still very hot, but man, he was sex on a stick in his AMC days.

One strand of spaghetti fills up that skinny bitch.

The house looks nice, but I’m sorry—I just can’t.

If I were a big celebrity or wealthy, I'd never share photos of the interior of my home let alone give a tour.

Why give the burglars, weirdos, scam artists, rapists, kidnappers a blueprint guided tour of all the nooks and crannies, ins and outs of your home? Asking for trouble.

Those posed photos are vomit inducing, and close to camp. Someone, please slap them, now!

Look we are in New York and eating pizza because we are in New York.

A non-New Yorker’s view of New York.

Quite nice place, even if its not my preferred style, at least it not bland

[quote]Who here would blow Mark though?

R35 I would for sure, he's hot. I'd suck him and fuck him

Buying so much at once from Paris flea markets strikes me as inauthentic.

“Get me a bunch of quirky antiques.”

These types of possessions should accrue organically by happenstance over a lifetime.

Loading a house with a bunch if them all at once borders on tacky.

I've heard of when the man goes up into the man but how do you think these two queens do it?

I can't believe anyone is still painting walls beige. What is it, 2003? I was beginning to think nothing was worse than greige, but something is-- and that something is beige.

Fag

I reluctantly love it. R45 I don't see beige, I think it's called "Parchment."

Soulless. Just like a hotel. So it's a good thing that that's what they were going for.

I do even have morbid curiosity as to see their dwellings

[Quote]I don't see beige, I think it's called "Parchment."

Kelly has finally polished off the plate of spaghetti R2.

She's a Mid-Afternoon Palmful-of-Raw-Almonds Girl. Kelly, Goop, Sarah Jessica... They all specify in their interviews that they have a palmful (not handful!) of raw almonds in the mid-afternoon to "keep their energy up", implying that women who need MORE than a palmful of raw almonds are sows at the trough.

It's a decorator's vision of their personas. It doesn't have an ounce of "them" in it.