I called my landlord today

And what did he find?

Water damage in the basement wall

What is he filling your crack with?

Will you come over and examine my crack?

And did he find a hole?

Could he find it through the nacreous layers of permacum?

Is there enough black caulk to fill the hole?

OP, your crack would give him splinters...tend to your roids.

How bad is the leak?

Did you take a video?

The level of wit on this thread reminds me of Wilde’s “The Importance Of Being Earnest.”

Can I get your landlord's number?

OP - "I called my landlord today"

Really. What did you call him?

Ba-dump-dump... thank you, thank you. I'll be playing 8 shows a week.

How was the sex?

[quote]The level of wit on this thread reminds me of Wilde’s “The Importance Of Being Earnest.”

A Bunburyist enjoys burying his pole in another's buns.

Turned out there was matted down hair in your crack.

Clean out your crack yourself before calling the super.

That crack has turned into a large crevice with a couple of fissures extending from it, so trying to fill it would just become a sloppy-looking mess and lead to very unsatisfying results.

Everyone in the building knows this is OP's own fault.

He's been told time and time again to use a stud finder if he wants something nailed and hung.

How was the load

I hope he was wearing a gas mask to protect him from the stench, and a HAZMAT suit to protect him from the toxic waste!

You're such a card, OP.