These MAGA gays don't seem to get why their peers don't want them around. As gay men, you'd think they'd have some sensitivity to what their politics engender, but there's a part of the MAGAt brain that precludes self awareness, empathy and just plain old common decency.
My friend group is celebrating the 50th anniversary of two members, great men who have lived the life. They met in the early 70s, formed a union and built honorable lives when it was extremely difficult. They adopted two boys (several years apart and not biologically related), raised them, fed them, educated them, and gave them lives that were simply out of their reach; both are now successful, happy and proud of their gay dads. These two men have contributed to the gay community in immeasurable ways, and are just plain good men.
Well, a mutual friend reacted poorly when he received an invitation to their celebratory dinner, but a MAGA gay dude who intruded in our group via a hookup with the mutual did not. Now, MAGAman has only been in our friend group for roughly 6 months and, frankly, only out of respect for the mutual. We've all had words with him because he just can't read the room and know when to keep his mouth shut, and he's spouted some crazy shit including a shockingly cruel disparaging comment that was extraordinarily hurtful to another man in our group, and we've all had enough of him. We told the mutual that we'll deal with MAGAman on occasion, but not this 50th anniversary celebration. One of the celebrants quietly thanked those of us dealing with this so they didn't have to.
The mutual got all bent out of shape when hubby and I finally told him if insisted on bringing his MAGA hookup to our friends' 50th anniversary party, he was uninvited too. We tried to explain to him, using examples of the MAGAman's vitriolic outbursts as recent as our Labor Day barbecue (when he hurled the hurtful epithet), that we don't want our celebrants' party spoiled by politics and we know, without doubt, that MAGAman will not be able to show even minimal respect. The mutual finally seemed to accept the situation, but MAGAman has made such a big deal out of it that we're ready to send them both packing.
I bumped into MAGAman at the grocery store last week, and the first words out of his mouth were "Am I still not invited to [celebrants]'s party?" — not "hello", not "how are you", and he couldn't contain himself when I said "just the fact that the first thing you say to me is about it should tell you why you are not." He got even more upset when one of the store managers came over and told him directly that if he didn't lower his voice and calm down he'd have to leave, and he practically screamed at this poor employee that it was discrimination that the manager — who I've known on a first name basis for years as I shop in this store and know all of the employees by name, and them, me — didn't threaten me with the same. The manager just looked at him and said "he's not making an ass of himself" gesturing toward me. MAGAman stormed out, shouting that he'd never shop there again. When I apologized to the manager, he shrugged his shoulders and said "we all know someone..."
I really don't know how we're going to handle it if MAGAman shows up regardless that he is not invited. The celebration is after the election, and we're girding ourselves for the worst — that he'll gloat if Trump wins, and he'll scream it was stolen if not — and all we want to do is celebrate our friends' lives and accomplishments in a pleasant environment. It's a party, for fuck's sake.
I hate what Donald Trump has done to this nation.
