Let's Be an Episode of Match Game '73

I'm Brett Sommers, you just know I smell of booze and cigarettes

I'm the production assistant Charles Nelson Reilly is blowing in his dressing room.

I'm the hilarious SNL spoof with stars

Pam Sumpter

Steven Nielsen Perry

Sarah Annette Boob

Nancy Nan George

Chipsey Boday

Dirk Densten

I'm making whoopy

I'm the always whiny and forever homely Patty Deutch.

I'm bazooms.

I'm your announcer, Johnny Olsen!

I'm Richard Dawson, furious when they instituted the "wheel" for the Final Match.

I'm Marcia Wallace

I'm BrendaD ickson predicting the future.

We're the girls in the audience who shout, "RIGHT ON BRETT!" that make Richard Dawson see green.

But he eventually landed at Family Feud where he gave smelly slimy saliva kisses to all the attractive female contestants.

I'm Fannie Flagg, wearing a sweater with two fried eggs over the boobs.

I'm Cuckoo, Friend, and Ollie.

I'm the bimbo celebrity in the front left on weeks when Goodson-Todman want to reward Gene.

I'm the peculiar homage to the Confederate States of America.

Elaine Joyce r14?

I’m future Public Relations Mogul, Morning Joe regular Donny Deutsch. I’m fresh out of college and just won $5000 matching Betty White!

My fro is natural.

Dumb Dora was SOOOOOOOOOOO dumb, she went to the Datalounge looking for her____________________.

I’m me, in utero.

R16. Please refer to me as the Widow Elaine Simon.

I'm Betty White, and I'm actually funny.

I'm also smarter and better at this game than the regulars. Of course, I would never say it directly....

I'm Nipsey Russell when then need someone of color

I’m Gene Rayburn getting frustrated at the audience because they aren’t responding to the “Dumb Dora was so dumb!” “How dumb was she?”

I'm R15 and R17 and I can't figure out how to post a link.

You bitch. Whenever Match Game comes up I AM CUCKOO FRAN & OLLIE

I'm Old Man Periwinkle, and frankly, I'm a bit hurt by the constant jokes.

I'm Gary Burghoff and I'm a pompous ass

I'm the contestant June, the mid-western mom of three with the Carol Brady haircut. I've been married for 16 years to my high school sweetheart Chip, who's never home because he's an international airline pilot. I'm raising all three boys - aged 12, 11 and 9 all on my own because he's never home. When the oldest are 18 and 17, I promise myself to leave the cheating asshole and get my real estate license with the money I win today. The uncontrollable youngest boy can go live with his father and new girlfriend. I'm not bitter - not in the least.

In the meantime, I'll flirt and act coquettish with actor Bert Convy sitting across from me on the panel. He's super sexy, smart, and rich.

I'm Scoey Mitchell, in case Nipsey is already booked elsewhere..

I'm the male contestant, Todd. I'm the 6', 27 year old, stunning blond bachelor from Long Beach, California. All the women go crazy over my look - a younger Robert Redford, if you will. I'm trying to break into acting, but not big Hollywood movies or television. I'm trying to break into homosexual films up in San Francisco, or New York City with the money I earn today. It will pay for my airline ticket. I've kept my homosexual self a secret to the outside world, though I do play my Streisand and Garland albums full blast on the wi-fi in my apartment. I have a crush on my straight neighbor Juan from Brazil, and plan on making a move on him.

In the meantime, I'll flirt and act coquettish with actor Bert Convy sitting across from me on the panel. He's super sexy, smart, and rich. But why is that fem Charles Nelson Riley winking at me and blowing air kisses to me during commercial breaks ?

I'm Patti Deutsch's blank stare during the opening credits.

I the first half of the 1973 Season of Match Game 7X. I did become the fun show that everyone remembers until the second half of the season when they added dirty questions, and Brett and Charles became regulars.

I'm the the BOMP BOMP BOMP music playing while the celebrities write their answers,

I'm Gene Rayburn's extremely long *BLANK*

I'm Joyce Bulifant. I can barely spell my own name, let alone write other words on these cards.

I'm Rayburn's phallic microphone - long and thin with a mushroom head.

That would be "microphone" R34.

I'm courtesy of Botany 500

I'm the Rice A Roni consolation prize .. The San Francisco Treat!

I'm the flushing sound that should have accompanied the losing contestants being spun away into the void.

What did game show contestants do with all that Rice-A- Roni ? I hope they donated them to food banks and shelters.

I'm the florescent orange color scheme that was oh-so-popular in the hip 1970s.

How much Rice A Roni did they get? Was it just one package?

I'm a San francisco "treat"

r43, I seem to remember on Let's Make a Deal in that era that stuff like that was usually "$25 worth of ______"

According to a Google search, Rice-a-Roni was about $.39 in the 1970s. $25 worth would be about 64 boxes.

I’m a year’s supply of Eskimo Pies — the consolation prize 9 out of 10 Fat Whores recommend.

I'm the Friday show. After a day of taping a week's worth of episodes, the celebrities are all drunk and getting harder to control.

I liked you the best, r47, because at the end you showed who would be on the next week.

I'm the crushing disappointment when a favorite celebrity comes on the show and proves to be an absolute idiot, incapable of playing the game or even being funny. I'm naming no names. He knows who he is.

R49. MacLean Stevenson?

I'm Mary Ann Mobley's impeccable penmanship.

I'm Orson Bean

R52. If only you used the crosswalk, Orson...

I'm Orson Welles, and I'm the most famous Orson. I don't need to be booked on this stupid game show.

I'm contestant Kirstie Alley. Gene had a lot of trouble with my name, but I won so many and was on so long he finally learned it.

I'm Richard Dawson acting sulky and disengaged when Goodson/Todman wouldn't let me out of my contract after Family Feud took off.

I'm Fannie Flagg's tits. THEY'RE NOT FOR YOU.

I'm the old drunk dude who made it to the Super Match round and told jokingly told Gene Rayburn I was expecting to see some stars when I came on the show, visibly pissing off the other old drunk, Richard Dawson.

I'm Bowser hosting the Hollywood Squares portion of the Match Game Hollywood Squares hour.

I am the award winning documentary Behind The Blank

I'm creepy Gene Rayburn whipping out my little tube of breath spray before forcing a slobbery "welcome" kiss on the new young actress sitting bottom left.

That "welcome kiss" bit was so well-known that I can't help but wonder how many of those actresses piled on the garlic before filming began.

I'm all the female contestants who were stewardesses.

I'm the woman with the pretty nipples...dimples! Dimples!

I'm boobs.

I'm "Chuck," Charles's macho alter ego.

I'm the red-headed hussy, Kaye Stevens. I usually have too much to drink, and I'm always throwing myself at Dick Dawson. I can hear Brett and Charles making fun of me during the breaks.

R67 She's creepy with her Mrs. Costanza doll hair.

Hardly anyone gives a shit about these two anymore. In five years or so when Will & Kate's kids hit the teens they'll be really old news. Especially if they all turn out attractive. It looks like they will.

R69. Which two? Elaine Joyce and Jamie Farr?

OOPs wrong thread sorry

R71. It's okay!