The mystery of Melania

She runs to the nearest street corner to hump a fire hydrant.

I know lots of elder fraus who stopped having sex in their 30s or 40s.

Melania has thrown herself into her architectural career.

You do naht undeerstand

Her needs are satisfied with cash only.

Let’s all give Vairst Letty a warm wish on VD Day!

She’s a whore what’s the mystery?

What mystery? She married a rich powerful man

George Santos fulfills her needs.

She buys Coke in bottles for a reason.

She's an old hooker. Those are the most unsexual people when they're not being paid

Needs are diverted and satisfied with mindless shopping.

Surgeries and cosmetic procedures.

Eastern European slags aren't mysterious

OH look another Trump thread.

Oh. Look. Another. Magat. 🤮

Weak setup to the thread. There's nothing to say.

She's just the latest of Mar-a-Lago's mistresses.

She flies her favorite donkey in from Tijuana once a month.

She sits on the dryer in spin mode.

OP, you mean you haven't seen her personal and otherwise classified ads in the Shiny Sheet?

How is she SERVICED?

It's a SECRET.

Pool boys.

Ramon the donkey satisfies her needs down in Tijuana, only $10 entrance fee that includes two free well drinks!

She finger bangs herself thinking of all the money she has stashed off shore.

Seriously, I read she was having a long-term relationship with a man who worked at a jewelry store in Trump tower.

Body Guards, all the rich fraus know this.

Ze power of poosey!

Ze power of mooney!

She exudes coldness from every fibre of her being. Utterly devoid of any charisma whatsoever. She’s almost like some kind of evil movie villain.

She’s no great prize herself. Plus with all of Trump’s money going to E. Jean Carroll, the state of NY and a ton of civil trials that are not going to go his way, she must be wondering WTF she’s still doing there.

I was hoping to find out how many body doubles have been used for appearances and if it is part of some prenup contract - x number of public appearances and no more.

I don't know exactly how she satisfies herself, but I'm betting most of the time batteries are involved.

[quote]It's pretty well understood she and her husband have nothing to do with one another anymore

Can you blame her?

Many women (not all) experience a loss of libido after menopause. Their testosterone drops significantly as does estrogen. She probably has little interest and certainly not with him.

Melania's most redeeming quality is that she hates all of them, though mostly Shitler & Ivanka, which makes me sort of like her. She's no better than the others, but I'll give her this: she lays low & keeps her mouth shut (and maybe talking to the feds for all we know) and while at some point there will be a reckoning for the others, she'll likely glide away & live a wealthy, comfortable, Trump-free life

I wonder what's going to become of her awkward 7' Trump spawn? He's remained pretty quiet and news has been hands off since he's not 18 yet. Will he hide from the press like she does? Or turn into a douche bro like Don and Eric.

Probably both

Fook Crease Moose!

Does Barron von Trump have a girlfriend? Almost 18 and an INSEL?

Do you mean incel?

Does Trump even see that kid? What a weird fucking family. Literally if you're Ivanka

I think Trump warmed up to young Lurch after he left office. He takes Lurch golfing.

My theory is Melania doesn't hate Donald. She made a decision to be a trophy wife. Apparently she decline the marriage once or twice then said yes. Melania is a superficial person. She also seems to be politically conservative and kind of a straight talking gun moll type. I think she gets mad at Trump quite often when Trump fucks up, embarrassing her and himself. She has always seen the relationship as transactional - they are partners in a performance that has endured for years. She doesn't seem like a pushover - she stands up to Trump and everyone else. There have been many moments when the facade breaks and she looks happy and also completely dejected and miserable or even hurt. If she wanted to get out of that transactional relationship she has had many opportunities but she stays and I take that as proof she likes certain aspects of Trumps bravado and identity. For her affective and sexual needs, she had that hot DILF Tiffany security professional, and I am sure there have been others.

I have always been impressed by her commitment to the highest of heels.

As cliche' as this sounds a few years ago I read that she has been in a long term relationship with her former bodyguard. Her relationship with Trump is transactional. I once saw a picture of the guy. Decent looking, tall not beefy, but muscular looking. short blonde hair. He was wearing a suit.

[quote]So how are her womanly needs being satisfied?

Maybe she has a secret bf/gigolo but my impression has been that she just wants a luxury and easy life. She wasn't really into being First Lady or political. I think she mainly wants to lie around the pool at Mar-a-Lago, have sauna treatments, a chef to make good food for her, have her family cared for (she likes her parents and son a lot), be able to buy designer clothes, jewelry, etc.

Hank Siemers was head of Security at Trump Towers for a while. He was her lover. May still be.

R45 that's about the sum of it.

I would fuck Hank, too.

She shares Trump's racist beliefs 100%.

Double dates with Barron, Carly and Ben.

She's a vile, repellant slag.

I truly wish her the worst.

She got her anchor baby and her millions in pre-nup cash, so she declared her pussy off limits to Benedict Donald. It's probably too stretched out anyway for his little dick.

If she ever tells her REAL story, it will be a bombshell.

Does her NDA with Trump expire upon his death or has he somehow worked in clauses that apply to other immediate members of the Trump family? Damn, that book would be a global best seller, maybe on par with a Harry Potter installment, r53.

She's an autistic blank canvas and you can imagine whatever you want about her.

I think I figured out who’s behind that DC proclamation of this (and every other week) as Aromantic Week.

r29, Or Cartoon von's, Dahlink.

She knows by avoiding the media she comes across as mysterious and clever. She's hardly interesting or smart. Bitch is getting paid, a lot, and won't drive off her "exit ramp" (divorce, book deals) until he croaks or loses the presidency. I really hope Barron can function as a normal adult and spill the real tea...about EVERYthing. That kid, though, has also probably signed NDAs before he could even read.

There's no mystery about Mel. IMO she was Trump's minder. She was paid in rubles to manage the fucker and keep Vlad informed through his "buffers."

I'm with whoever said hookers have little interest in sex up above. She has to be an execrable POS to be with that insane orange tinted tub of lard. Her using Michelle's words, wearing a coat that said "I really don't care" and wearing that military jacket during his last attempt at the presidency have to be the lowest a First Lady has ever gone, ever. Cold as ice and not a drop of blood in her body.

Prostitutes aren't mysterious. They get paid to fuck. End of story.

Diamond-encrusted BOB (Battery-Operated Boyfriend).

Ouch!

She agrees with her husband. She just doesn’t want to share in taking the heat he gets from not being able to control himself and perpetually demanding adulation.

The monumental effort she had to make just to stand at his side and keep a smile on was too much for her. She wants to be surrounded by gild gilt while she does her exercises and has her manicures and botox sessions. She signed up to ride his coattail to all that trashy excess and she’s seeing the agreement through.

Her use of the term "palace intrigue" tells you everything you need to know about her.

*gold gilt

Thank yoo, r43. I take my commitment to tall shoe very serious. Just like my Barron. I give him Food and Water every day and walk on Sunday. He is my Son, that I truely love.

She's obviously damaged emotionally, her parents undoubtedly whored her out, that's what they do in eastern Europe, criminals everywhere, especially the miserable slavs, and she is still a slav.

The mystery of the Slovenian donkey show

She is a gypsy.

Would you like to buy gypsy tears?

[quote] The mystery of the Slovenian donkey show

That was Number 69 in the Nancy Drew After Dark series.

Her native land looks beautiful in photos

it' sort of the cheap italy. of the austria with a coastline

She seems to have little interest in anything and no friends. I have read she spends most days at the spa. She seems rather vacuous.

[quote] She doesn't seem like a pushover - she stands up to Trump

Uh, NOPE! The one peek at how she really feels was from the secret tape her best friend did of their phone conversion before that went sour. Melania basically said, "they" told me this is what we have to do and so you have to take the fall for this. NOT, your my best friend and I told them to F-off.

Or, she’s ’ a sociopath who doesn’t give a shit about anybody else and is cunning enough to shove the blame onto others.

r71 They spent two episodes of the most recent season of "The Amazing Race" in Slovenia. It looked really beautiful.

When does Barron turn 18? People have speculated that she's only hanging around to protect him while he's still a minor. I think she's loyal to him and wants to make sure he inherits, though I doubt there will be much left in a couple years.

Mom is probably going to have be out working the streets again, Barron.

Barron turns 18 on March 20th, and we will see how she renegotiated her NDA. We saw that his appearance at her mom's funeral was bullshit. I hope she got her wifely stipend in cash in a separate bank account so she doesn't have to stand in the bankruptcy line.

Apparently she has a secret security guard boyfriend that she is bumping on the low.

She also has her own apartment in Trump Tower.

It's much smaller that the 60 thousand square foot triplex palace in the tabloid pictures. But it is hers and Trump does not visit

[quote] When does Barron turn 18? People have speculated that she's only hanging around to protect him while he's still a minor. I think she's loyal to him and wants to make sure he inherits, though I doubt there will be much left in a couple years.

Yeah, right. She's never leaving Trump.

Who cares

No one has sex anymore. Everyone is too anxious and tired. Occasionally we will masterbate but even that seems like a bother. Meh.

Mercedes from housekeeping takes care of her needs.

[quote]So how are her womanly needs being satisfied?

How indeed...

cold, hard cash. just leave it on the dresser.

Indeed, money is her only interest, followed perhaps by her son

What mystery? The entire planet has seen her snatch.

Where is that horribly tacky room R86? Yikes.

I hope she has been getting her pre-nup payments upfront and sequestered away from the Trump Org.

I hope Melania doesn't have to get into the bankruptcy creditor's line.

I either read or heard that she was back to seeing her guy from Tiffany's.

In creditor line, hoor with good poosey alway get moneys first.

R34, listen to you Miss 'Know it all'.