Our dear Jacob spotted out in LA today

I'd eat that flat ass.

Who?

Troll shit.

He needs buttocks implants.

Agreed, R3.

His body looks weird.

He's like a straight up-and-down line.

No definition, no character, no shape, no form. Just a straight line.

How tall is he??

[quote] He needs buttocks implants.

His disgusting, black abdomen mole has more meat than his ass.

I could iron my linen tablecloth on his backside.

He needs one of those posture support back bras.

With no ass - what’s he going to do in three years to make money?

No one needs ass implants. They look weird and gross. His ass is fine. He’s a very tall and thin naturally fit white dude. They usually don’t have a lot of ass. Go to Europe. Most of them don’t.

His jeans are loose on him, for starters. Speaking like he has skintight pants on.

R3 is r4

He’ll look like Walter Matthau once he hits 45

R5 6'5"

When asked by Jimmy Fallon to name his first celebrity crush, he paused a moment, then answered Brad Pitt, "I thought, that's one beautiful man."

r14 He seemed really and sincere about it, then asswipe moron Jimmy Fallon laughed and laughed like it was the most ludicrous thing he'd ever heard. I really hate Jimmy Fallon. I liked Jacob in that interview, though.

[quote] He’s a very tall and thin naturally fit white dude.

R14 and? He said Brad Pitt is a beautiful man. I loved his honesty and sincerity. Him using the word crush doesn’t necessarily mean a literal CRUSH in a sexual or romantic way. Young people use the word for people they admire and look up to etc. Paul Mescal just used it in a professional way recently.

Spending that movie money on a Range Rover - a fool and his money….

In his major new project, Jacob Elordi *IS* Flat Stanley.

r19 meh, you tried

For the Zoomers who don’t know who Walter Matthau is…

R18 ummm I’m sure he can afford it. He doesn’t seem to be hurting for money. He also grew up in an upper middle class family.

R17 and? and what? Thanks so much for clarifying the meaning of crush for the rest of us.

Personally, I think Brad Pitt got him hard.

The male Rose Byrne.

I don’t r24. I don’t think he’s gay at all but knows what he’s doing. The way he acknowledged it shows it wasn’t that type of crush.

Butterbutt.

R24 Cracked a fattie - as the Aussies say.

What kind of a stupid name is ELORDI?

It’s a relatively common surname in Italy, Spain, Argentina and Uruguay, R29. And while we’re here - what kind of stupid name do you have, fuckstick?

r29 I believe it is Spanish. He didn't choose his last name.

What’s wrong with his surname? It might surprise you to know, R29 but not all Australians are called Smith or Jones.

It’s a multicultural country.

Australian Paul Mercurio.

Yeah - what kind of stupid name is “Mercurio”?

R1, you're gonna need some syrup and butter to go with that pancake butt. :-P

I wish I looked like him and had his charming surname.

R29 it’s a surname. Who the fuck asks about someone’s surname and calls it stupid? That’s passed down. Retard. I swear you need to get a job

R35 let’s see you… you always have something to say about everyone else but let everyone see what YOU look like… I know. Let’s see what everyone else thinks.

He looks like an alien. I get the appeal, but he looks odd.

R39 That contributes to the appeal. He's got a weird intensity that's also somehow subdued. Kind of intriguing. I don't want to know him, but I'd let him abuse me.

R40, you see intensity, but I see aloofness.

Watching this interview with Jacob and Ellen DeGeneres, it's so strange because she's speaking to him but it's almost as if he's barely there.

He obviously hears her questions, because he's responding to them.

But he hardly looks her in the eye, and he's fidgeting and looking around, and doing anything BUT being present.

It's very weird.

I think something is wrong with him.

He's clearly on the spectrum.

I was just nervous that Ellen was going to force me play a stupid game.

He seems fine. Socially awkward but so attractive no one cares.

[quote]He's clearly on the spectrum.

I don’t think he needs an excuse to be weird.

[quote] How tall is he??

Not as tall as they say. Barely the height of his Range Rover.

[quote] No one needs ass implants. They look weird and gross. His ass is fine. He’s a very tall and thin naturally fit white dude. They usually don’t have a lot of ass. Go to Europe. Most of them don’t.

Then what's the point of them?! With no ass to speak of?

[quote] Spending that movie money on a Range Rover - a fool and his money….

He leases. He's self-employed and gets a U.S. income tax deduction for leasing a vehicle.

[quote] It’s a relatively common surname in Italy, Spain, Argentina and Uruguay, [R29]. And while we’re here - what kind of stupid name do you have, fuckstick?

Fuckstick is a rather common name on anonymous internet discussion boards, particularly Datalounge.

I look at his butt and I have the urge to iron my shirts.

[quote] How tall is he??

In the clip at R41 he says he's 6'5" tall.

R46 he is indeed 6’5. He’s huge. Videos of him exist. Welcome to 2024.

[quote] They usually don’t have a lot of ass. Go to Europe. Most of them don’t.

European men provide fodder for some of the best bubble butt-watching on the planet. Narrow tight sweet humpable bubble butts are everywhere.

He’s not European.

[quote] He’s not European.

He's Flatasian.

[qutoe] He’s not European.

On the hotness scale, Aussie ass falls somewhere between European and North American, with the U.S. ranking widest and flatest.

Watch him in Saltburn. Watch him in Euphoria. You would not think it’s the same actor ( well you would, but hardly ). Each role is unique. Not like most actors - you always notice the ACTOR in the role more than the character in the film. I think Jacob is truly amazing. You DLers criticizing his ass — you are laughable . You wish you had a scintilla of his good looks .

[quote] You wish you had a scintilla of his good looks.

R57, Lenscrafters is featuring a number of discounts this month.

[quote] [R46] he is indeed 6’5. He’s huge. Videos of him exist. Welcome to 2024.

Yes, I suppose 2024 will be the year when Hollywood actors stop exaggerating their height.

R41 I think he's just nervous.

He looks awfully thin here, which may account for the flatter (perhaps than normal?) ass. He has lost weight in the last year or two and looks a bit different. The face is a 10/10 for me though—I think he’s exquisite looking.

R53 European as in Greek, Italian and Spanish type of European? Yes. European as in Swedish, Finnish, German type of European? No. You clearly haven’t traveled. The average white male has narrow hips and thin/small butts. Large butts have always been associated with black men and women.

R59 you’re slow and easily missed the point. Hollywood actors have always lied about their height and people who meet them always confirm whether it’s true or not. In the past it was easier to lie and no one would find out. In 2024 it’s nearly impossible. Everyone who meets Jacob says he’s a giant in person and striking to look at.

R46 definitely has never stood next to a Range Rover. Range Rover’s on average are 6’1 in height. Some can go up to 6 feet 3 inches. These aren’t small cars. They’re huge.

So flat.

[quote] The average white male has narrow hips and thin/small butts. Large butts have always been associated with black men and women

????

How does race come up in a thread about Jacob Elordi?!

And where do you live?! There is no "average" white male in America, it's all different types. Large butts are associated with large men, or athletic men.

R66 bodybuilding is a different story. Jacob is not a bodybuilder.

White men have never ever been known for big butts. And that’s not an opinion.

Race mixing has led to white people having curvier figures etc.

[quote] Race mixing has led to white people having curvier figures etc.

Examples please.

[quote] Race mixing has led to white people having curvier figures etc.

LOL!!!!!!

"Race mixing"?!!! Is it 1954 again?

[quote] European as in Greek, Italian and Spanish type of European?

Well he is of Basque descent which is in Spain.

[quote] [R66] bodybuilding is a different story. Jacob is not a bodybuilder. White men have never ever been known for big butts. And that’s not an opinion.

Sidney Crosby is white and not a bodybuilder.

Basque isn’t literally Spain and they don’t like when people say that.

And that’s all fat r71. Good for him.

[quote] Large butts have always been associated with black men and women.

Do tell. The attribute we were discussing was flatness, not total volume. And even in Germanic and Nordic countries many men tend to have curvey butts irrespective of overall size. I recommend checking them out next time you're there.

Jacob Elordi Doesn't Like Small Talk: 'I Just Walk Away'

Good for him r75. I wish I was bold enough to.

What a goober hat that is.

Jacob is definitely an oddball.

I didn't realize it until I started watching videos of him speaking.

Jacob Elordi's First Crush was Legolas from Lord of The Rings

Wasn’t it Brad Pitt (from another post)? If he was attracted to both, he has a type.

[quote] [R46] definitely has never stood next to a Range Rover. Range Rover’s on average are 6’1 in height.

Ha! R46 is well over 6ft and has had his very own Range Rover for 10 years, thank you.

......and.......BLOCK!

Everyone block R46

I’d pump his gas.

R81 clearly you haven’t or your comment wouldn’t have been so stupid and ignorant. He’s a few inches taller than a car that is 6’1… but you claim he isn’t tall. Make it make sense.

He is very clearly 6’5.

Look at OP's picture, Helen Keller at r85!

[quote] Everyone block [R46]

Why?! Because I'm right? Or because I'm 6'3"? Or because I have a Range Rover?

Nevermind, I just realized I'm too fabulous to care.

Most of his spine is above the shoulders. Cute, but pass.

He reminds me of a young Matt Dillon. Not my type, but he was terrific in SALTBURN and looking forward to seeing him in PRISCILLA. He's definitely a talent on the rise.

R86 retard with no job or education, I’ve looked at the photos. That is just an angle giving the illusion the car is taller than him. You know nothing and it blows my mind.

He is a few inches taller than the 6’1 car, and he isn’t even standing fully tall with his head up.

Not to mention some range rovers are taller than 6’1. I don’t know if his is over 6’1, which is the standard one.

Shirtless Sidney Crosby. Not a bodybuilder.

Taller than it or not, he's still a douchebag for driving a Range Rover

[quote]He's clearly on the spectrum.

This is DL. That goes without saying

R94 Kinsey, Aspergers, or both?

One of my favorite things about DL is the way threads get derailed in such random ways — like arguing over height relative to Range Rovers. 🤣

All actors are aspies on DL, R95.

[quote] [R86] retard with no job or education, I’ve looked at the photos. That is just an angle giving the illusion the car is taller than him. You know nothing and it blows my mind.

Dear Heart, that photo is as close as you'll ever come to Elordi or a Range Rover. So don't refer to anyone as a 'retard.' It is a horrible slur.

R98 and you see he’s taller than the car. Retard.