Unintentionally Bad Movies

Sounds like it might be interesting Op, but I’ll take your word for it.

R1 there is a scene where the little autistic boy does an imitation that is one of the most ridiculous things ever filmed.

The Bonfire of the Vanities. It had everything going for it:

Excellent source material by Tom Wolfe

A good director- Brian de Palma

The music was by Dave Grusin

And an extremely talented cast of Tom Hanks, Bruce Willis, F. Murray Abraham, Melanie Griffith, Morgan Freeman, Kim Cattrall, Donald Moffat, Alan King, Saul Rubinek, Kevin Dunn, and Sir Robert Stephens.

And it was an utter DISASTER.

Recently saw this and dug the 1990 costuming. The point of this film was to make Liv Tyler a star. Tyler is another nepo baby

Scenes From a Mall. You'd think with Bette Midler and Woody Allen it might be somewhat funny or insightful. No. It was a boring, tedious slog. 5.4 on IMDb.

What was this '90s obsession with slow people all about, anyway?

The kid from Silent Fall:

Ben Faulkner was a local child from a small-town in Baltimore when he was spotted by director Bruce Beresford and his casting agent on Ben's local school. He was cast as Tim, an autistic child in the thriller Silent Fall (1994) where he's the only witness of a brutal family murder. A non-professional actor Faulkner's insight on this difficult role was by researching a little about the peculiarities and mannerism of kids with autism. He gracefully acted along veterans Richard Dreyfuss, Linda Hamilton, J.T. Walsh and Liv Tyler (on her film debut as well, and she plays Timmy's sister).

Faulkner hasn't returned to acting ever since that only film performance but he left an impressive mark for fans of the movie.

The casting in Silent Fall is so bad. The cast has zero chemistry.

Silent Fall walked or crawled so Don’t Say a Word could run.

R6 Awakenings, Nell, Regarding Henry… what other “slow” movies?

What was the point of this?

R11

1. That’s a TV movie

2. That’s hardly UNINTENTIONALLY bad

So you're saying they set out to make a bad movie.

R13 it’s a ridiculous movie. It’s not meant to be serious.

Nuts

How many intentionally bad movies are made?

Now wait a damn minute, r5 -- you mean to tell me nobody wanted to see a ponytail-sporting Woody Allen going down on Bette Midler in a movie theater?!

R16 it’s serious movies that set out to be taken seriously. Something like this wouldn’t qualify.

I thought THE JOKER was a bit awful. But I’m not its audience.

The Exorcist II owns this thread. It was directed by John Boorman who has directed some very good/great films so you would think he'd know what he was getting himself into by directing a sequel to The Exorcist. But no. He hated the first movie and wanted the second movie to be a sort of anti-Exorcist. Which is stupid because he clearly didn't understand why the first movie was a hit. According to Linda Blair, the script was changed countless times to the point where it no longer reflected what the movie originally looked like.. And let's not get started on the acting. Or Linda Blair's tap dancing.

"Silent Fall" is one of those films lost to time—you never hear anyone talk about it, and probably for good reason. What makes such a bizarre failure is that it has a very famous (and reasonably talented) cast as well as an acclaimed director behind it. The whole thing never really comes together, though. It's a fucking mess. The fall atmosphere in it is nice and at times creepy, and the interior decor is painfully "upper middle class suburban early '90s". Those are frankly the two things I remember most about it.

It’s been a long time since watched it but “Meet Joe Black” was one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. It stars Brad Pit and Anthony Hopkins so you’d think it would but good but it was just awful.

Brad does a horrific Jamaican accent. There’s also a lot of spoon-licking for no apparent reason.

The horrible script and Nepo Baby Liv Tyler ruins the movie.

The script has the characters constantly doing the Titanic thing of saying the other character’s names. “Are we going there, Jack? Do you think we should, Jack? Okay, I’ll trust you, Jack!”

R22 one of the most boring movies of all time.

R22 Funny enough, Pitt-Hopkins' first pairing ("Legends of the Fall") also fits in this category.

The Silent Fall poster was horrendous but ahead of its time, more Netflix than 90s. Still a bad poster considering the other stars omitted. It’s one thing to click play at home, but to point at that poster and say “one ticket for Silent Fall please” is another.

Merci Dr Rey, a Merchant Ivory production with big name case, the ‘highlight’ of which is mental patient Jane Birkin who works as a dubbing artist and is convinced she is Vanessa Redgrave who she dubs into French.

As a self-certified floptologist, love watching trailers for forgotten flops. Mid budget films starring A-listers, which are so bad and inconsequential that they don't even make the "Worst of" lists (usually big budget bombs get all the attention). Many of these films are practically erased from history, with only low-res trailers on youtube, copied from a VHS tape. Anybody up for a screening of Billy Bathgate starring Dustin Hoffman and Nicole Kidman?

r12 Boris and Natasha was filmed as a theatrical movie and either dumped by studio or studio went bankrupt, Showtime ended up premiering it, but it wasn't a TV movie.

BILLY BATHGATE was when Nicole Kidman still seemed elusive, and slightly unknown.

R28 Billy Bathgate is a horrible title. A simple generic retitle like The Next Gangster would have increased BO x2. Loren Dean was hot too. The trailer doesn’t look bad, little formulaic and dull. R30 Nicole surprisingly snagged a GG mom for BSA for this.

Ebert: Billy Bathgate cost a lot of money to make, they say, but it's not there on the screen.

$15M BO on a $48M budget

I wonder about the budgets of these movies and what they actually cost. If adjusted for inflation, Billy Bathgate would cost $108 million to produce today. But I think "studio accounting" probably ate up anywhere from 20-40% of these budgets. The industry was awash in home video money for the first time and the rentals and sales markets were pumping so much money into the system that it was a fantastically lucrative period for studios. But the self dealing in the way they paid for movies was probably a huge part of those budgets--like all the production offices were on the studio lot, the studio charges insane amounts for those offices, the studio uses that money to build nicer buildings, buy more expensive equipment that they own and the film itself ends up with a huge budget it doesnt make back so the studio gets a huge tax writeoff.

Any film adaptation of any Nicholas Sparks book.

Iron fucking Weed

[quote] Awakenings, Nell, Regarding Henry… what other “slow” movies?

Square Dance (1987) was ahead of them all.

What is this?

I was listening to a podcast about the genre of erotic thrillers in the 90s (all but gone now). It motivated me to watch "Jade", starring Linda Fiorentino and David Caruso.

When they got to the part where Caruso stumbles on a crime scene and calls it a "fuck house", I had to call cut, lol. The saddest part is that William Friedkin directed it. In 1994 when this schlock was made he hadn't made a successful film for 2 decades. Thanks to nepotism, his wife, Sherry Lansing, who was studio head, pulled rank and gave him the movie to direct. After that, she had to black ball her own husband and keep him away from any potentially lucrative scripts. Friedkin later admitted he fell into a deep depression afterwards given the critical panning of the movie. Even Caruso ran back to TV while they would still have him back, effectively ending his fledgling movie career.

Back to CSI with thee, cunt! Hahahaha

Kitten with a Whip

I forgot to mention that Jade was one in a long line of movies made trying to capitalize on the success of Basic Instinct, which is why it was made in the first place.

I don't know that I would call Hudson Hawk unintentionally bad R36.

Bruce Willis and Sandra Bernhardt clearly knew the kind of movie they are in, and they hammed it up.

Body of Evidence with Madonna proving she's no Sharon Stone

Bruce Willis made so many awful movies.

The Blind Side

Village Voice Melissa Anderson

Blind Side the movie peddles the most insidious kind of racism, one in which whiteys are virtuous saviors, coming to the rescue of African-Americans who become superfluous in narratives that are supposed to be about them.

House of Gucci. Characters who are supposed to be Italian speaking English to each other with hilariously bad accents.

Lana's stepdaughter and her medical student boyfriend spike Lana's sedatives with LSD. The film introduced Karin Mossberg in her last film.

Fucked up accents are distracting

At First Sight. Blind Val Kilmer, Mira Sorvino fall in love Blind man has operation to restore his eyesight. He has a hard time adjusting. My friend and I were groaning and giggling in the theater. A young couple in front of us had a kid about 8 years old. Every time a scene involved kissing or sex, they'd toss the kids jacket over his head.

Incredibly flimsy adaptation of Nora Ephron's novel. Much ado about nothing. The film evaporates in the memory as you're watching it.

This is a bitter sour movie about two people who are only marginally interesting.-Gene Siskel

We Need to Talk About Kevin

Who thought this awful, feel bad melodrama was a good idea?

Pointlessly depressing without really any redeeming qualities, imo, but I see it has a very solid rating on IMDb.

I HATED it.

This is on Tubi for viewing. I've never watched it all the way through. Talk about bad accents.

This is not a cheap movie. Big money was spent to create this film and propel the female lead's movie stardom.

In my opinion, this film began her career decline.

All of the Matrix movies after the original.

The Zapruder film.

The Comfort of Strangers (1990). How can a film scored so beautifully, set in eerily creepy Venice and with such a gorgeous cast be so terminally dull?

a pointless remake with nepo baby Hudson='A mindless muddle' (L.A. Weekly)

It's neither a thriller nor a serious examination of saleable images of violence in our society. In fact, it's an example of the things the film purports to criticize. It's glossy, glamorous preposterous and violent trash.

An overrated film which has little to do with the Vietnam war and more to do with the consciousness raising of a married woman through her relationship to a paraplegic which allows her to experience orgasm. The biggest change we see in her is her coiffure. The soundtrack is a nonstop parade of sixties rock songs, but the basic story could have been told in any era.

A lot of movies involving a disabled main character often turn out bad. One example is Sia's movie Music.

r48 Of course, of horse Carly Simon sings the theme song for Heartburn.

The Walk starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, directed by Robert Zemeckis. French man walks ze tightrope between ze World Trade Center. A LOT of questionable accent work by JGL. And another turkey for the once great Zemeckis.

Boxing Helena. Never walked out of a movie before that one.

It was so bad Kim Basinger preferred going bankrupt to starring in it.

[Quote] Of course, of horse Carly Simon sings the theme song for Heartburn.

as she did for another Mike Nichol's film Working Girl. Neither of Carly's songs enhanced the films as they didn't seem related to the theme, plot or tone of the films

R54 The remake of the Four Feathers starred Heath Ledger and he looked beautiful in that movie. But casting Kate Hudson was a terrible mistake. She was awful. In spite of Kate, I enjoyed the movie for Heath.

Discuss:

It of course worked better on Broadway where I saw it twice and loved it. The film Chorus Line is a kind of poor man's All That Jazz which was a dazzlingly hollow film.

R64 is wrong. All that Jazz is a classic.

[quote][R6] Awakenings, Nell, Regarding Henry… what other “slow” movies?

Nell wasn't slow. She had been isolated from humanity most of her life so was more of a wild child a la Helen Keller.

However, to add to your list, FORREST GUMP was the granddaddy of them all.

[quote]The Walk starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, directed by Robert Zemeckis. French man walks ze tightrope between ze World Trade Center. A LOT of questionable accent work by JGL. And another turkey for the once great Zemeckis.

Are you an actual Frenchman who can vouch that his accent is dodgy -- or are you just picking on him because JGL is American?

R37 thank you for reminding me about this film. I am going to incorporate that line for everyday usage. When my cousin shows me their remodeled living room/kitchen, whatever, I will be shure to say it looks like a “fuck house.”

Jaws:The Revenge is a special study of horror and camp. Easily the worst of the "Jaws" series and its not these were Oscar bait films to begin with. At one point in the movie the shark leaps out of the water like Shamu and starts roaring. The idiot producers clearly didn't do their research because it's well known sharks have no vocal cords and can't make any kind of noise with their bodies. Then they poke the shark with a stick and it explodes! Pure stupidity and camp. The Jaws movies forever ruined the image of the great white shark, turning it to a monster, giving it abilities it never really had and instilling fear of a very misunderstood animal. They really should've stopped after the original which didn't really need any sequels in my opinion.

I saw at least four of these movies and remember thinking "What the fuck was the point of that?" when the lights came up. That never happens anymore. I stream most of my movies and ditch them fairly early if they suck.

Are there fewer stupid medium-to-large budget movies since the advent of streaming?

R25 - I’ve just had a flashback to seeing LOTF when it first came out. Hopkins gurning and stomping after his character has a stroke was so goddamn hilarious…

I tried to watch Bad Santa the other night. I didn’t mind Billy Joe Jack or whatever his name is, or the constant cursing, but that fat kid was personality-less. The yellow snot under his nose in the beginning was pretty awful too. I wasn’t about to stay til the end with the inevitable sap and pap.

There are always only a handful of 'good' films per year. It's been like that since the early days of film.

I recently subscribed to the Lifetime Movie Club through my Roku (all Lifetime movies, all the time, no commercials, about $5.00/mo) and I love it. Every movie on there is fantastically, earnestly bad. Glorious escapism.

r67 I think he sounded just like Pepe Le Pew. But perhaps Pepe was voiced by an actual Frenchman?

Grease 2

[quote]Lana's stepdaughter and her medical student boyfriend spike Lana's sedatives with LSD.

That “Big Cube” trailer explains so much about “Die, Mommie, Die”

R65 It's one note, lacks substance, there's no feeling for any of its characters and it's overly long. Style over substance.

The song'n'dance routines have been created in the cutting-room and have lost any sense of fun; Fellini-esque moments add little but pretension; and scenes of a real open-heart operation, alternating with footage of a symbolic Angel of Death in veil and white gloves, fail even in terms of the surreal.-TIME OUT

The style IS the substance.

It's empty like your argument.

On the technical end it’s near brilliant, but as an emotionally impactful character study it’s a total flop. The protagonist is too selfish for anyone to care about and shows too little redeeming qualities, nor much of an arc, to make it worthwhile. Ultimately it’s an exercise in extreme self-loathing that will leave the viewer as detached from the proceedings as the characters who are in it-Richard Winters SCOPOPHILLIA

I didn't understand this movie and I've watched it several times...it is a titty movie but the male leads are prettier than the actresses.

Jack Scalia looks like a good looking version of JFK jr in this film.

Technically this is a bad film but it is so entertaining

I SAID IRON FUCKING WEED!

Lol r68! 🤣

R45- This movie is a close second for fabulousness after An Imitation Of Life (1959)

Madame X (1966)

I love Madame X. When she is completely down, out and haggard she has the most impeccable manicure.

Richard Brooks the director of The Blackboard Jungle, Elmer Gantry, In Cold Blood and Looking for Mr. Goodbar made The Happy Ending starring his wife Jean Simmons in an Oscar nominated performance as an alcoholic housewife. It's a a howler. Also starring John Forsythe, Tina Louise, Shirley Jones, Bobby Darin and the incomparable Nanette Fabray.

Yes, R75, it's well known that Charles Boyer did all the voice work for Pepé le Pew.

Just finished watching one! "Jacqueline Susanna's The Love Machine," starring John Phillip Law, Robert Ryan, Dyan Cannon, David Hemmings, Jackie Cooper, and Shecky Greene(!). It's on Tubi only through tomorrow, so hurry.

"I'm a connoisseur of crap!" declares the Love Machine himself in one scene. Darling, aren't we all?

R3 YES!

I picked up the paperback in an airport bookstore in late-1988 on my way to spend two years in the Soviet Union. I read it several times. I returned to the US in December 1990 the day before the movie opened. I could not wait to see it. And boy, it was a dog. Such a good book ruined by a shitty screenplay. The same screenwriter/adapter (Michael Cristofer) ruined McInerney's Gia with an awful screenplay, but did well with Updike's Witches of Eastwick. Go figure.

[quote]r64 It of course worked better on Broadway

It’s so strange that the director of GANDHI wasn’t able to fashion the show into a dazzling movie musical!

Breathless with Richard Gere—who did look good and had charisma—and a French actress who was so bad it was distracting. Then again, she was probably hired for her looks.

Tea With Mussolini

Moment by Moment. Boring and completely unbelievable. John Travolta and Lily Tomlin? Insanity.

The George Raft Story. I suppose there is a kernel of truth to the screenplay since Raft supposedly sold his story cos he needed the money but the film is full of bad decisions. Raft was short and stocky. Ray Danton as Raft is tall and lean. With Barrie Chase as Carole Lombard (!) and Jayne Mansfield as Betty Grable (!!). The best casting is the man who plays Jack Warner - he looks just like him.

R92 I actually enjoyed that one, it borders on bad.

[Quote] It’s so strange that the director of GANDHI wasn’t able to fashion the show into a dazzling movie musical!

R90 the play is stage bound with one setting which is a difficult hurdle to overcome.

Showgirls

Although today it is considered a cult classic and a worthwhile satirical movie, it was not made as as satire, nor was it marketed as such. It was a box-office bomb that turned a profit only after the home-theater market. It was also the first widely released NC-17 film.

R93 also known as Aeon by Aeon

That the two stars look enough alike to be brother and sister is no help-Vincent Canby NY Times

Brian de Palma was the wrong director to take on BONFIRE OF THE VANITIES. It needed someone like Mike Nichols.

That project was doomed given how the studio wanted to make the lead character "likeable" and "relatable," resulting in a very miscast Tom Hanks in a role that needed William Hurt. The character of the alcoholic Brit journalist (based on Christopher Hitchens, I think) was turned into an uninteresting, obnoxious jerk played by Bruce Willis.

There's a very good book about the making of this turkey, called The Devil's Candy by Julie Salomon.

THE NIGHT PORTER, with Dirk Bogarde and Charlotte Rampling as a former SS officer now working in a hotel and a woman who had been his mistress in a concentration camp. Total garbage directed by the untalented Liliana Cavani.

[quote]r100 Total garbage directed by the untalented Liliana Cavani.

Pauline Kael wrote that THE NIGHT PORTER “proves that women can make junk just like men.”

The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle - with DeNiro!

Tall Story. Jane Fonda's film debut. Director Joshua Logan gives her some lovely closeups but he uses too many closeups in the darn film. Maybe he's trying to get away from how the material is based on a play but since Ray Walston plays to the balcony, it's still pretty obvious. The film was released the same year but before Psycho so it's hard to look at Anthony Perkins as anything other than Norman Bates.

"John Q" (2002). Idiotic and onver the top premise. Denzel's character is so loathsome in that film.

The only good thing about it... Anne HeHe stars in it.

R104 Denzel eats scenery for breakfast

I just watched Silent Fall based on what you posted, OP. It wasn’t as bad as I was expecting, but r2 is correct, the kid’s imitations were absolutely ridiculous and the worst part of the movie. Soo stupid. I was not expecting the movie to go where it did, however. That grossed me out. Fucking creep.

Liv Tyler was pretty good for a 16 year old in her first movie. Dreyfess, Lithgow, JT Walsh- all fine.

It also had a young Zahn McClarnon in it. I like him- Dark Winds, Reservation Dogs, Longmire, Doctor Sleep- he’s good. And was an adorable 24 or 25 year old. (Although I like him with long hair better).

Now I’m going to try and find Don’t Say a Word. Anyone know where it’s streaming?

R42, I couldn’t even read the synopsis without getting bored.

Don't Say A Word is on YouTube, FREE.

I love Brittany Murphy and Michael Douglas but Don't Say A Word is a really dumb and ignorant piece of film-making.

R107. I paid money to see that mess. Dreadful. Halle Berry and Bruce Willis made terrible films