Favorite AbFab quotes, sweetie darlings?

Just the one dear?

But is it art?

I'm chanting as we speak.

You only work in a shop you know? You can drop the attitude.

Not one bloody boyfriend in the whole time that I’ve known you! I mean, you’re not that bloody ugly! What’s the matter with you? Huh?

One more facelift on this one and she'll have a beard.

The last mosquito that bit me had to check into the Betty Ford clinic.

“Who dies in their own vomit these days?! No one!”

Liquid lunch, Mrs M.

I want them to kill me! Champagne for Lulu!

Too many Christmas cakes!

Money, tickets, passports!

Not since 1973.

Still no ring on that finger, Patsy.

skimming a neat profit off the whole of human misery

Eddie: "You don't get Princess Di to a major..." Bubble: "Anne. Princess Anne." Eddie: "As well as?" Bubble: "Instead of."

You only work in a shop you know, you can drop the attitude.

"baby shower?"

She was so anally retentive she couldn’t sit down for fear of sucking up the furniture.

Was ti a Bee?

Champers all right for you Pats or do you want some salmon and nibbly bits?

“If ONLY!”

Quite big tits.

I’ve got nothing to wear on public transport.

“Eh oh…I think he needs a drink. His nose is very dry…”

I tell them to hack off your tits, vomit up everything you have ever eaten and walk down the runway. Yes, I remember you now.

ABORT ABORT ABORT!

CHUCK IT DOWN THE PAN!

Get me....a knitting needle!

Is he from Gabon?

Mummy wanted you darling. Mummy wanted you the day you were born, However..the day after.

Lacroix, darling! LACROIX!

Have you eaten something?

No, not since 1973.

One of my favorite moments isn't dialogue.....

It's all the gestures Joanna as Patsy does here as she speaks to Saffy's potential future mother-in-law, who we learn is Kalishia Klegg.....

Re: Jennifer Lopez

"I mean how high do that woman's heels have to be to keep that nancy off the pavement?"

OP- This is for YOU

☺🙂🤗

Patsy and Edina are talking about a recent flood of style revivals and Patsy says:

You get your dry cleaning back and it’s a REVIVAL.

Is it a bee?

Re: going to Morocco

Edina: You go for drugs... dirt cheap plates and rugs...

Patsy: Easy going sex with gorgeous underage youths.

Edina: Exactly.

"You go from one self-induced crisis to the next" - I've used this on several friends of mine. It's so very true.

"It's carpets,it's madness,Carpet Madness! Carpet Madness now! Just carpets! It's madness,madness now!" *Sale starts Friday

Edina: "What I wouldn't give to be anorexic."

I mentally quote that every time I see a media story about an anorexic celebrity.

OY SHOPGIRL!

Some nonsensical throw-away lines made me laugh the hardest. One episode, where Patsy, Eddy and Saffy are trapped in a locked room, had an exchange where Patsy is just vicious with Saffy, wishing she’d been aborted, incriminating her for all the misery in her life. When Saffy takes offense and challenges her, a blurts “She’s just tryin’ to BE NICE!!”

Saffy: 'I don't think they let people with drug convictions in.’

Eddie: 'Darling, it's not a conviction.’

Patsy: 'Just a firm belief.’

R32, you just know Lumley heard the laughter and extended the moment.

R35, yes!

There's talk of Saunders going back to the well on this in some form. They're well on the record claiming they could never do the show today. Yet if there was ever a zeitgeist that could benefit from Saunder's rapier, it's the neoPuritanism of now.

'Darling, if you want to talk bollocks and discover the meaning of life, you're better off downing a bottle of whiskey. At least that way, you're unconscious by the time you start to take yourself seriously.'

Bubble: 'Ooo... Bear with me, see, I am hopeless with names, faces and people.'

"I now pay for old people to eat cake."

Bombay Mix!

The only Chippendale I've ever sat on had..two legs.

You may dress like Christian but the similarity ends there!

*a Christian

What you need is a little compilation, my friend.

You can never have enough hats, gloves, or shoes.

I think she's tremendous.

Yeah cheers thanks a lot

🎶🎶walkin’ down the road🎶

Something in a blue kagool is hovering around the front door.

'Even Amanda de Cadenet can remember the word 'accessories', darling.'

The goose flies at night!

Poor dear sad old Patsy.

One of the funniest scenes is Edina in the kitchen listening to Titicaca talking about having a whole cider in her dorm room and a boy staying over and Edina is muttering stuff and one line was "couldn't chew through the ropes?". For some reason I lmao. I think it's her delivery.

Patsy perking up "Hello, Daniel" with a leer.

"They're all muslin round here"

That one seemed to fly right over the audience's head, different time I guess.

Also, "thank you Yentob" (Alan Yentob was controller of BBC One at the time)

“yes, in The Chamberpot of Secrets.”

Saffy: She burned me with her cigarette!

Patsy: Accident.

Thanks to New Labour!

I want them to kill me!

^ Not a DL classic that was for another quote.

You little piece of dribble piss!

Have you been giving my clothes away again to the homeless? I was accosted by a man in a Givenchy track suit.

Pats...I'm 72

*turns around dramatically* "THURSDAY!"

Edina: Sweetie?! Darling?! I'm having a hot flash!

Saffron: You're standing too close to the kettle.

"You know, one snap of my fingers and I can raise hemlines so high, that the world is your gynecologist."

Well it may not be all great and good but it ain't that bad, so cheer up world it may never bloody happen!

“Here I am, your mother, primed for your first sexual experience, and night after night, dry bloody sheets!”

“Mum, what was Patsy?”

“Only for a period in the ‘70s, then it fell off.”

“Surfaces! I need surfaces!”

Bubble, re: Minnie Driver: “Is it a dwarf?”

Bubble TO Minnie Driver: “Catherine Zeta Jones rather stole your thunder, didn’t she?”

Skin - Is In.

I'm borderline shy/wild.

She's blind!

Who dies in their own vomit these days?”

“Nobody!”

^ Sorry that was a repeat.

The mood for the next edition: Sex, bitch, aristo, sex, punk, whore, bitch, prossie, lessie, punk, tart, slut. Oh but Alex… Alex... With lovely shoes.

Saffron: [about Jackie] I can't believe what that woman said to me!

Edina: Yeah, well, she is witty, I'll give her that.

Saffron: What gives her the right to treat people like that, Mum?

Edina: She's thin!

“Uh, Hellllo…my name is Cherysh, with a ‘Y’ “

“How come when she put the phone up to her ear, all I could hear was the ocean?”

A carTOON?!?!

If the models get any younger they'll start chucking fetuses down the runways.

Vegetable bloody mousse!

Bloody buggery Abyssinian Vogue

Give me a knitting needle!

One snap of my fingers and I can raise hemlines so high the whole world is your gynecologist!

I'm good, Eddie!

“Who cares if you’re fat or thin?! Who cares if you LIVE OR DIE?!”

Adina on the phone to the hospital:

"Hello, Emergency Liposuction please."

Eddie: You! Remember: Cancel my aromatherapy, my psychotherapy, my reflexology, my osteopath, my homeopath, my naturopath, my crystal reading, my shiatsu, my organic hairdresser... and see if I can be re-birthed next Thursday afternoon.

Bubble: Consider it done.

I was in labor so long they had to shave me twice.

I frequently quote Bubble:

Who can say??

"But I've only ever had cranial acupuncture. Oh! How many organs has it harpooned on its way down there?!"

She was so anally retentive she couldn't sit down for fear of sucking up the furniture.

I hate gynecologists! A man that can look you in the vagina, but never the eye!

TITICACA!!!!

From the episode with Patsy’s sister Jackie:

Justin: Did you have the same father?

Jackie: No one knows. Mother was such a slut.

Sisters Grimm, can I tempt you?

Thin-things! I’m going to do thin-things!

God! Why does it have to be in some underground shame-hole? Is this the car clamp club?

This is a …sort of…corpse…in an open, oaken, oblong coffin…

Hoover vacuum's broke

Sometimes, it's kindeeeerrrr!

Talk the Latin! Talk the Latin!

Why, oh why do we pay taxes, huh? Just so we can have bloody parking restrictions, and bloody ugly traffic wardens, and bollocky pedestrian bloody crossings! Why not just have a “Stupidity Tax?” Just tax the stupid people!

r112 LET THEM DIE

We could do some lovely photos

Scene- Eddie and Pats dancing, high on E at what appears to be a rave.

Saffy turns the light on revealing them at the living room mantelpiece.

“Go to bed!”

Moisture, is my word du jour.

In real life I have been known from time to time to bellow: We're not all stupid! We don't all need bloody nursemaiding!

MP In Drug-crazed Sex Romp Shock With Fash Mag Slag

Harrods hamster

He can scream with me when Valentino comes out with a new flip flop!

“They’re Minimalists!”

Second hand goods! Can't keep your hands off second hand goods!!!

Repeating "this is not my fat, this is fat from another lifetime" like a mantra.

"I want to go down in HISTORY as the one who put Princess Anne in a Viviane Westwood BASK!"

Lines inside means lines outside.

Too late to flush her now.

Pats is desperately lighting up about 5 ciggies at once from one flame: "Bloody asthmatic cab driver!!"

Eddie is waving her shopping list ("Shopping list for Mum!") inside the market looking for assistance: "Helloooo?"

Leave the mummy and come to Granny

Lulu announces concert dates, and Edina - her PR person - 'Why does she never tell me these things?'.

"She told me I was a pariah."

"Do you know what a pariah is?"

"It's a fish."

"...That's right."