Mouseboy gets the new GQ cover

So posed, so predictable, so played out- the brooding, unsmiling, young, famous , financially comfortable human.

Look how “deep” I am.

I don’t mind play-acting. Artifice has its necessary place.

But, just for once, whether it’s Lourdes Leon, Chalamet, whoever, I’d like to see the bravery to be true and have them smile directly into the camera.

That would truly be edgy and subversive and have the benefit of being real.

After all, who would have more reason to smile?

They will never stop trying to convince the public that he’s a star.

His PR has done this a million times before and it didn’t stop the cannibal film from being a flop.

He really wants you to believe that the Bob Dylan film is still happening.

You got hand it to GQ. “Chalamet had become the sort of Hollywood property whose presence in an otherwise borderline project could get it greenlighted, and made quickly.”

So Chapter Three is Going Electric. I wonder what Chapter Four will be…?

r6 ...going, gone

[quote]He had a mask, too, a holdover for so many of his kind, even as a mask in public, at night, draws more eyes your way than it diverts.

Ooh, little edge of snark from GQ?

Coming of age? The mouse is 27!

Haha his answer when asked about Austin Butler giving him a run for his money.

[quote]And some new things outside of acting. It was all top secret, he said, but one of those new projects sparkled, the other got you drunk.

Ugh, another one jumping on the celebrity make up and booze trend?

Gross

“It’s not lost on me that the only things I’ve shot since wrapping Dune,” he said, smiling, “are ads for billion-dollar companies satirizing a version of my life.”

You will like me America, you will find me talented America, you will find me hot America.

And I'll speak solely in platitudes

“Chalamet had become the sort of Hollywood property whose presence in an otherwise borderline project could get it greenlighted, and made quickly.” Give it up to his team.

I still love the title "Little Lord Cigarette".

How did we get to this point?

He considers Zendaya and Tom Holland “good” people in Hollywood.

The feminization of men continues.

Yes, because he's the ultimate fashion icon.

Please.

If Zendaya is a good person, does that mean Armie is one of the bad people, Timmy?

Did he borrow this outfit from Chris Pine?

I get that his androgynous look and style fits the woke moment and that arguably he’s cute enough to bring the girls to the theater but not too threatening to the egos of their boyfriends. He can’t act at all though and Hollywood has to sooner rather than later face the reality he’s not a star.

There’s literally a genocide going on…

He will be another problematic Ezra Miller. His fake persona of intellectual, artsy, and sensitive guy is gone. That was a facade. He is fame hungry and money hungry. He is becoming very reckless.

Fuck these bitches, Timmy. You should see what Dataloungers find attractive.

This is too much for one day GQ.

He addressed Armie Hammer

r29 No, he clumsily avoided addressing Armie Hammer

We don't know him.

In ten or twenty years he’ll write a book about how Hollywood messed him up.

He’s dating a Trashian and yet apparently is qualified to make a judgment about who is a “good” or “bad” person in Hollywood.

I don’t understand how this odd looking man keeps getting work. He has no on screen charisma and is built like a 12 year old girl.

Timothee is the Gretchen Mol of his generation.

I bet I'd rather fuck him than fuck you OP.

I’m tired of seeing a Mouse in a dress.

Hosting SNL on Nov. 11th? Does Lorne already know the strike will be over by then?

We will never stop trying to make the Mouseboy happen!

Did the massive NYU chlamydia outbreak ever clear up?

R38: Apparently actors can appear on Saturday Night Live during the strike as long as they don’t promote their films. Still, he is acting and there’s quite a bit of scripted content so this loophole is bullshit. I hope this and the Kylie Jenner stuff makes the fangirls want to drive off a cliff. I hope this hack gets a Drew Barrymore like backlash for doing this shit.

I saw “The Holdovers” this weekend and if the kid in that stays in acting, he will eclipse Mouseboy quickly.

R42: The only problem with that is we’ll just get another plain old meh white boy shoved down our throats.

R43 quite true.

I love it when he speaks French.

The new poster looks like shit.

What's a magazine?

Is he Charlie Puth's secret half-brother or something?

At best he gets a Golden Globe nomination and honestly he doesn't even deserve that based on what I've seen in the trailers.

R46 Coming Soon to Hallmark!

He’s like a charisma black hole.

Dl posters sure spend a lot of time and effort affirming their unbridled, yet, inexplicable hatred for this person, as if they knew him. Oddly psychotic.

R52: The harsh backlash is most certainly welcome.

Why?

Can't blame him for enjoying the ride while it lasts.

I like his hair.

r54 Because, as has been detailed numerous times, he's a raging asshole. He also lacks the talent we're constantly being told he has.

Not nearly as raging an asshole as his DL haters, r54. You tell us more about yourselves than about Timmy with your ranting and looning. It's pathetic.

Oops. r58 is directed at r57, not r54.

Aww is the wittle fangirl upset? Bless. Also, the whining about bitchery on DL. You fraus are beyond tedious.

What are the actual ways he's known to be an asshole? Or is it all just drum-banging crap?

Deliberately ignoring a press aide at Cannes who was trying to get him to leave a photoshoot, showing up to the red carpet at Cannes clearly high and making his castmates stand around waiting while he was getting worshipped by his fangirls, smoking indoors and tapping ash over the side, getting into bed with the Kardashians, the reports from people who grew up in the same building as he did about him being a bully - especially towards a mentally challenged kid, the report from the girl at NYU that he trying to neg, being a brat on a film set and treating crew like shit including trying to get a PA fired because she forgot an umbrella, and multiple reports from film festivals of him being a prick towards staff.

Mouseboy's Wonka makes Depp's version look like Citizen Kane.

I guess those who didn't get cast at the Bronxville Community Theater production of " La Cage..." are pretty envious of those who are successful.

He worked as shop-bottom in Miss Barbra Streisands mall.

You read all about why she had too fire him in her autobio coming out now.

R65 He spurned her matronly efforts to tuck his face into her vagina. Declaring that "the little shit is clearly a homo" over the PA system, she then fired him and had escort him out into the parking lot.

They only show 50% of his ratface on that cover, so it's a win for people with working eyeballs.

He looks like a bratty serial killer in his new Chanel commercial.

It’s not the sexy vibe he thinks it is.

Good song, though.

He needs a good pissfucking.

I’ve heard he has the herp, so I should be in the clear…oh wait, his ass is probably more toxic.

R68 I'm sure he's a sweet boy if you ease the cock in nice and slow.

R10, Where's the "haha" part? TC was diplomatic in describing Austin's background---which Butler himself has acknowledged was "Nickolodeon."

But the other side of that coin is how hard Oscar-nominated, Golden-Globe-and-BAFTA-winning actor Austin worked, eventually to CO-STAR with No-Major-Awards Master Chalemet in "Dune: 2." Is that the "Haha" part? Because it's Feyd-Rautha laughing.

That Timothee really IS working with the "Elvis" team (especially Polly Bennett) for the Dylan biopic is also testament to Austin's accomplishment.

As for mentioning Austin's seriousness of purpose, everyone Butler has worked with has observed similarly, from Denzel to Baz to Hanks to Brolin Jr to Villeneuve to, here, Chalamet. If you think you detect snark (maybe in the "Skaarsgard" comment?), either you are incorrect or Timmy is insecure and really DID need to step up his game.

R67, It's one of 5 different TC covers.

"With their busy schedules, Timothee and Kylie agree they're looking for different things and thus have amicably decided to separate at this time." - January 2024.

A friend of mine watched the Chanel commercial and said "Isn't that little guy about four feet tall and weighs about 80 pounds?". Yes what red blooded woman wouldn't want Little Lord Cigarette crawling on them?

R68: Commercials...right.

R71 he looks like a streak of piss there. There’s nothing to him.

He's not my idea of a heart throb but his face and eyes are sort of expressive, in an actor-ish way. I think he's a pretty good actor. I don't hate him.

Love him

But he has unnatural natural beauty.

I wonder if his bush is as full and curly.

Looks like he isn't limiting his scabbing to just SNL

R81: No wonder he's scabbing.