I'm the cigarette smoke filling up the room
Let's Be an Office in the 1970's
by Anonymous | reply 165 | September 24, 2023 2:09 AM |
I'm the typewriter. They made me easy to use so a woman could have a job.
by Anonymous | reply 1 | September 9, 2023 4:26 PM |
I'm the question "Are you weird or just retarded?" when my boss sees my McGovern '72 sticker.
by Anonymous | reply 2 | September 9, 2023 4:28 PM |
I’m the office drunk. I was a joke back then, and tolerated with a tight smirk.
by Anonymous | reply 3 | September 9, 2023 4:30 PM |
I’m the understall action with married straight guys. No AIDS yet and homophobia was different. Sometimes a guy’s just gotta cum.
by Anonymous | reply 4 | September 9, 2023 4:32 PM |
I'm the receptacles filled with sand that were set about to accommodate cigarette butts during that era.
by Anonymous | reply 5 | September 9, 2023 4:37 PM |
I'm the emerald green Saarinen furniture in the sparsely decorated reception waiting area.
by Anonymous | reply 7 | September 9, 2023 4:44 PM |
I'm Liquid Paper.
by Anonymous | reply 8 | September 9, 2023 4:45 PM |
I’m enjoyable because there are no woke HR cunts holding everyone hostage.
by Anonymous | reply 9 | September 9, 2023 4:45 PM |
I'm the new key-to-disk Inforex machine everyone is breaking a sweat over learning how to use.
by Anonymous | reply 10 | September 9, 2023 4:53 PM |
I'm the diet:
Black coffee and cigarettes all morning.
Three scotch lunch at a restaurant.
After lunch black coffee and cigarettes.
2 pm drug pick me up.
4 pm scotch and cigars.
6 pm dinner at home made by the Mrs. and it damn well better be on the table.
After dinner, I read the paper and have a scotch and a cigar. Then Carol Burnett with a scotch and the Mrs., then the Mrs. leaves and I can watch Dick Cavett and a scotch before bed.
by Anonymous | reply 11 | September 9, 2023 5:23 PM |
My dad^
by Anonymous | reply 12 | September 9, 2023 5:23 PM |
I'm the upbeat muzak piped in to the elevator, hallways, break rooms, and reception areas since 1968. I sound like a knockoff of Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass combined with Vince Guaraldi. The only refuge from me is the actual offices themselves. I'm supposed to keep everyone in a happy, productive mood, but I am slowly driving them insane. The Powers That Be will only finally stop playing me in 1985 after a mass shooting takes out almost everyone in the building. The shooter tells his therapist I am what drove him to the shooting.
by Anonymous | reply 14 | September 9, 2023 5:36 PM |
R9 For your protected class. Own your hypocracy. Own your bigotry. Own your white supremacy. You owned everything else including my body. Earn the titles they earn.
by Anonymous | reply 15 | September 9, 2023 5:41 PM |
I'm the fake wood panel walls.
by Anonymous | reply 16 | September 9, 2023 5:44 PM |
R15 Teacunt, take some accountability for your own life. It’s not 1850 anymore.
by Anonymous | reply 17 | September 9, 2023 5:47 PM |
R17 who the fuck do you think you are insulting with your racist antebellum bigotry. I must pray.
by Anonymous | reply 18 | September 9, 2023 5:50 PM |
R18 Teacunt, you best calm ya ass down, bitch, or you gonna get red tagged and blocked.
by Anonymous | reply 19 | September 9, 2023 5:57 PM |
We're carbon paper and white out.
by Anonymous | reply 20 | September 9, 2023 7:37 PM |
R11- The topic of this thread is not
scenes from MADMEN
by Anonymous | reply 21 | September 9, 2023 7:38 PM |
R13-I always liked that handsome extra standing behind Ted
by Anonymous | reply 22 | September 9, 2023 7:40 PM |
I'm Ginny, the new temp. I've been assigned to "Billing."
by Anonymous | reply 23 | September 9, 2023 7:42 PM |
I’m the snack cart that comes through mid-morning and mid-afternoon.
by Anonymous | reply 24 | September 9, 2023 7:42 PM |
I'm the receptionist in her 30's whose Mitzi Gaynor hairstyle makes her look 50.
by Anonymous | reply 25 | September 9, 2023 7:43 PM |
I am the IBM Selectric II typewriter. I am the precursor to word processing machines.
Changing fonts is as easy as changing my element.
by Anonymous | reply 26 | September 9, 2023 7:48 PM |
I'm the worn copies of Esquire, Sports Illustrated and Rona Barrett's Gossip sitting on the waiting room table.
by Anonymous | reply 27 | September 9, 2023 7:50 PM |
That typewriter was the greatest. I loved the sound of an IBM II
by Anonymous | reply 28 | September 9, 2023 7:50 PM |
I'm the Leggs pantyhose
by Anonymous | reply 29 | September 9, 2023 7:53 PM |
I am a microfiche machine. I make document retrieval a breeze.
by Anonymous | reply 30 | September 9, 2023 7:53 PM |
I’m the clerk who’s told to drive to LAX and get on a plane to SFO with key documents in hand. I’m the fastest delivery available.
by Anonymous | reply 31 | September 9, 2023 7:56 PM |
I am IBM Selectric correction tape.
I make Wite-Out obsolete. I also make huffing Wite-Out obsolete.
by Anonymous | reply 32 | September 9, 2023 7:58 PM |
I'm the voluptuous secretary all the men in the office call "Boobsie."
by Anonymous | reply 33 | September 9, 2023 8:01 PM |
No matter how old you are everyone looks to be at least 50. I am 50.
by Anonymous | reply 34 | September 9, 2023 8:02 PM |
R6, printing out Merry Christmas banners.
by Anonymous | reply 35 | September 9, 2023 8:04 PM |
I'm the ass and boob grabbing of all the women under 30.
by Anonymous | reply 36 | September 9, 2023 8:06 PM |
I'm the "Hang in there Baby" poster in the break room.
by Anonymous | reply 37 | September 9, 2023 8:08 PM |
I’m the weekly paycheck, delivered to my desk by Ginny in Billing
by Anonymous | reply 38 | September 9, 2023 8:09 PM |
I'm the copies of Oui and Penthouse in the boss's locked bottom drawer.
by Anonymous | reply 39 | September 9, 2023 8:14 PM |
I'm the cool kids, ducking out to smoke Thai Stick in the park at lunch hour. We only work in this godawful office because we graduated from college and the are no real jobs due to it being the 1970s.
by Anonymous | reply 40 | September 9, 2023 8:14 PM |
I'm Earl, the bookkeeper. My wife and I are swingers.
by Anonymous | reply 41 | September 9, 2023 8:15 PM |
I'm Violet Newstead, confusing rat poison for Skinny and Sweet.
by Anonymous | reply 42 | September 9, 2023 8:17 PM |
I'm the jar of hardened Sanka sitting next to the coffee maker.
by Anonymous | reply 43 | September 9, 2023 8:18 PM |
I'm the vending machine with coffee, only 10 cents a cup!
by Anonymous | reply 44 | September 9, 2023 8:18 PM |
I am a union job in 1973. A snow storm closes the airport in my town, the very day pay-checks are air-expressed in from company payroll processing facility in New Jersey. Watch as plant management scrambles to get enough cash to pay 600 union employees, as per the union agreement. Otherwise, no tickee, no washee, and that's a problem.
by Anonymous | reply 45 | September 9, 2023 8:19 PM |
I'm the receptionist's smoker's voice.
by Anonymous | reply 46 | September 9, 2023 8:23 PM |
the Mother in Law's Tongue. Soon to be replaced with ferns. Followed by a ficus and then they finally just knock down my big stone planter that sits in the middle of the lobby. Somebody suggests a fish tank but nothing ever comes of it.
by Anonymous | reply 47 | September 9, 2023 8:28 PM |
I'm the dumping ashes down the busty secretary's bosom because I saw Mel Brooks do it in a movie. It's funny
by Anonymous | reply 48 | September 9, 2023 8:48 PM |
I'm a torn box full of ancient xmas decorations - homemade, tarnished, forgotten - from various office eras. until the time each year some underling is ordered to create a xmas display. Then I am dug out of storage, opened, and quickly closed up and put back.
by Anonymous | reply 49 | September 9, 2023 8:52 PM |
I am the powdered drink called tang that was advertised as being used by astronauts
by Anonymous | reply 50 | September 9, 2023 9:50 PM |
I'm the refrigerator in the break room. I STINK to high heaven!
by Anonymous | reply 51 | September 9, 2023 9:58 PM |
I’m the watergate salad at the office Christmas party.
by Anonymous | reply 52 | September 9, 2023 10:27 PM |
I’m rape and sexual harassment. I didn’t actually happen that much. The myth of me was drummed up by histrionic feminists.
by Anonymous | reply 53 | September 9, 2023 10:49 PM |
I'm the hip salesman who calls you "Sexytary". It gets me nowhere.
by Anonymous | reply 54 | September 9, 2023 11:12 PM |
I'm the pink salad served at parties
by Anonymous | reply 55 | September 9, 2023 11:17 PM |
I’m the boss, always called Mr. (insert surname) by the secretaries.
by Anonymous | reply 56 | September 9, 2023 11:22 PM |
I’m the avocado green IBM Selectric my father brought home from the office when I was replaced with a newer machine. I smell like cigarettes and always will for the next 10 years I’m in the house.
by Anonymous | reply 57 | September 9, 2023 11:32 PM |
I'm these handy dandy coffee mugs with plastic Solo cup disposable insert.
No washing!
by Anonymous | reply 58 | September 9, 2023 11:32 PM |
I'm Ginny and I'm the only woman in the office.
Well, Madge the secretary is a female but she's one of the guys.
by Anonymous | reply 59 | September 9, 2023 11:37 PM |
I'm the pencil used to dial a telephone - not just rotary phones, but buttons, too - because Marjorie's nails are too long.
by Anonymous | reply 61 | September 9, 2023 11:53 PM |
I'm Betty in the typing pool. My gal pal Louise keeps talking about something called "women's lib," but I'm just on the hunt for a husband. All the girls know the new dreamy executive is single, so I have to work fast.
by Anonymous | reply 62 | September 10, 2023 12:01 AM |
We're the Playgirl magazines hidden deep in the filing cabinet. Some of the men in the office look through us for hours when they are "working overtime" in the otherwise-empty office. They can't help themselves after the secretaries go gaga when pulling open the centerfolds.
by Anonymous | reply 63 | September 10, 2023 12:14 AM |
I’m the Carpenters piped in through the ceiling.
by Anonymous | reply 64 | September 10, 2023 12:32 AM |
^^^That sounds like an OSHA violation.
by Anonymous | reply 65 | September 10, 2023 2:47 AM |
I’m a spider plant
by Anonymous | reply 66 | September 10, 2023 3:42 AM |
I’m the 3 martini lunch breath
by Anonymous | reply 67 | September 10, 2023 3:43 AM |
I’m patching you through
by Anonymous | reply 68 | September 10, 2023 3:45 AM |
I'm the BIG American sedans ( NOT SUVs or Pickup trucks) filling up the outdoor parking lots in big cities all over America.
by Anonymous | reply 69 | September 10, 2023 3:48 AM |
I'm the plastic typewriter cover. It signifies to everyone that you've gone home.
by Anonymous | reply 70 | September 10, 2023 3:53 AM |
I’m a salesman busting out my best wop joke.
by Anonymous | reply 71 | September 10, 2023 3:58 AM |
I'm *72. If you're working late an you hear a BONG over the intercom it means someone is calling. You're supposed to answer.
by Anonymous | reply 72 | September 10, 2023 4:05 AM |
I'm Telex. It saves us a lot of money on long distance calls. Ask Gayle in the supply office for your onetime code.
by Anonymous | reply 73 | September 10, 2023 4:06 AM |
I'm the very generous safety net provided to all the employees and the sense that the success of the company is shared with them through job security, reasonable salaries, regular promotion and benefits benefits benefits. I'm dental, and vision, and medical insurance, a plus corporate country club for every employee including the pink collars, credit unions, cheap mortgages, matching contributions, and college scholarships. Reagan has not yet decreed all profits are to benefit only executives and shareholders, never employees and retirees.
by Anonymous | reply 75 | September 10, 2023 8:21 AM |
I’m the office potluck. Ambrosia for everyone!
by Anonymous | reply 76 | September 10, 2023 8:47 AM |
I’m the dictaphone desk unit where I record all of my correspondence to be transcribed later.
by Anonymous | reply 77 | September 10, 2023 8:55 AM |
Filing cabinets everywhere
by Anonymous | reply 78 | September 10, 2023 11:18 AM |
I'm Bryce, the only boy in the secretarial pool. Everyone thinks I do this so I can bed the ladies. Everyone except for Mrs. Randall, our boozy, floosy, supervisor. She keeps saying things like 'I think we'll assign you Mr. Carter today. I know you'll find him... stimulating.' and then she winks.
by Anonymous | reply 79 | September 10, 2023 11:48 AM |
Let’s be an office in downtown Des Moines, Iowa today. Its literally the same thing.
by Anonymous | reply 80 | September 10, 2023 12:35 PM |
We're the children and grandchildren of R75's workers (great comment BTW). Even though we get screwed every day by our employers, we support Republicans because they hate the blacks and the Mexicans too.
by Anonymous | reply 81 | September 10, 2023 1:41 PM |
I'm the Charlie and Old Spice fumes wafting through the office.
by Anonymous | reply 82 | September 10, 2023 2:03 PM |
I am the absence of that burnt microwave popcorn smell wafting through the building. Frankly, very few offices had a microwave oven in the 1970's.
by Anonymous | reply 83 | September 10, 2023 2:19 PM |
R25 is the millennial dream version of the 70s, not the actual reality…don’t give credit where it is it deserved.
by Anonymous | reply 84 | September 10, 2023 2:33 PM |
*not deserved
by Anonymous | reply 85 | September 10, 2023 2:43 PM |
I'm the shiny marbled walls in the building lobby.
by Anonymous | reply 86 | September 10, 2023 2:54 PM |
I'm the stench of Brylcreem in the men's restroom.
by Anonymous | reply 87 | September 10, 2023 2:56 PM |
'm the office summer picnic and I'm the blue collar husband of one of the secretaries and I don't like the way these pencil pushing guys are looking at my wife. I know they just want to fuck her and they chase her around the office everyday. Meanwhile I'm stuck fixing their cars at the auto repair shop. I make sure they see my huge dong every time I use the urinal.
by Anonymous | reply 88 | September 10, 2023 3:02 PM |
R88 I arrive at picnic wearing my blue coveralls too
by Anonymous | reply 89 | September 10, 2023 3:07 PM |
I'm the discussion of I, Claudius in the breakroom. That Derek Jacobi is going places.
by Anonymous | reply 90 | September 10, 2023 3:11 PM |
Combs in blue water in the men's restroom
by Anonymous | reply 91 | September 10, 2023 3:16 PM |
A mechanical shoe shiner…near the men’s room exit…
Or the shoe shine stand in the lobby, next to the Bell Telephone booths.
by Anonymous | reply 92 | September 10, 2023 3:18 PM |
I'm the credenza stocked with liquor in the boss' office. He says the liquor is for our visiting clients, but from 2 to 4, like clockwork, he helps himself to a bottomless tumbler of Scotch.
by Anonymous | reply 93 | September 10, 2023 4:01 PM |
I'm the keys placed in a bowl at the front door, for the swingers party at Jim and Betty's house!
by Anonymous | reply 94 | September 10, 2023 4:18 PM |
I'm R79's Bryce, eyeing Blue Collar Husband's huge dong in the men's room. This year's summer office picnic might not be as dull as it usually is.
by Anonymous | reply 95 | September 10, 2023 4:40 PM |
I'm a 45 year old divorcee working in this hellhole as an entry level secretary. Get this: my husband dumped ME for HIS secretary. At 5:00 I'll fight traffic heading home in my wood grain Pinto wagon and feed my ungrateful kids Swanson chicken pot pies. I'll drink enough Almaden Chablis in an attempt to blunt the pain of my depressing existence.
by Anonymous | reply 96 | September 10, 2023 4:46 PM |
I’m the boss’s buxom secretary. Everybody thinks I’m sleepin’ with him. No wonder they treat me like I’m some dimestore floozy!
by Anonymous | reply 97 | September 10, 2023 5:06 PM |
I'm the rubber thing in the back of the reciever to rest your ear on your shoulder. It's welcome has the phone weighs about 2 pounds and if it's not breaking your nails it's breaking your neck
by Anonymous | reply 98 | September 10, 2023 5:11 PM |
In the 1970s, R96 , a 45 yo divorcees kids would be in college or working.
by Anonymous | reply 99 | September 10, 2023 5:21 PM |
We're the dingy macrame plant holder and the stain on the carpet directly below.
by Anonymous | reply 100 | September 10, 2023 5:23 PM |
I'm the secretary's clip-on earrings. I take one of them off to answer the phone.
by Anonymous | reply 101 | September 10, 2023 5:24 PM |
I'm the IBM clock on the wall showing the time to all the diligent workers since I was installed in 1952
by Anonymous | reply 102 | September 10, 2023 5:26 PM |
I'm the passable quality of boring food in the company cafeteria.
by Anonymous | reply 103 | September 10, 2023 5:29 PM |
I'm Millie, the waitress from the lobby coffee shop. I've been working here for years.
by Anonymous | reply 104 | September 10, 2023 5:29 PM |
I’m Dora who also works in that coffee shop. I see and hear everything. I get extra tips for keeping my mouth shut.
by Anonymous | reply 105 | September 10, 2023 5:34 PM |
I'm the wall of data processing equipment with reels and blinking lights in Rudy Wells' office.
by Anonymous | reply 106 | September 10, 2023 5:42 PM |
I'm the secretary who's always called "sir" on the phone because of my smoker's voice.
by Anonymous | reply 107 | September 10, 2023 5:45 PM |
I'm the steel band watch entangled in the boss's wrist hair.
by Anonymous | reply 108 | September 10, 2023 5:52 PM |
R101, I always loved that move. 😀
by Anonymous | reply 109 | September 10, 2023 5:53 PM |
I'm R104 's foot scraper.
by Anonymous | reply 110 | September 10, 2023 6:00 PM |
I'm the state of the art IBM computer. I take up an entire room.
by Anonymous | reply 111 | September 10, 2023 6:00 PM |
I'm the bulge in the Xerox photocopy repairman's trousers.
by Anonymous | reply 112 | September 10, 2023 6:07 PM |
I'm the one black employee who only gets invited out to lunch the day after an episode of "Roots" airs.
by Anonymous | reply 113 | September 10, 2023 6:13 PM |
I'm the half-empty can of Tab soda in the lunchroom fridge.
by Anonymous | reply 114 | September 10, 2023 6:22 PM |
I'm the "Help Retarded Children" gumball machine in the lobby.
by Anonymous | reply 115 | September 10, 2023 6:33 PM |
I’m the Rolodex on the boss’s desk.
by Anonymous | reply 116 | September 10, 2023 7:04 PM |
I'm the windows on the 13th floor
by Anonymous | reply 117 | September 10, 2023 7:05 PM |
I'm the wall of urinals in the men's room. There's not a divider in sight.
by Anonymous | reply 118 | September 10, 2023 7:48 PM |
I'm surprised everyone let the dot matrix printer post in the beginning of the thread go by with nary a comment (that I have seen). Really, dot matrix printers didn't commonly show up in offices until the early 80s as the use of computers as commonplace office equipment in the 70s was somewhat rare at that point. Yes, there were HUGE ASS computers at very large companies and copiers (mimiographs, anyone?) were extremely standard, but having a dot matrix printer at the office wouldn't make much sense when barely anyone was using computers. Typewriters were the order of the day, dictophones/transcribers as well.
by Anonymous | reply 119 | September 10, 2023 8:09 PM |
I'm an IMB Executive typewriter with keys of different widths. I'm shoved back in the corner on an old typing table because the only girl who knew how to use me demanded a raise and got fired.
by Anonymous | reply 120 | September 10, 2023 9:15 PM |
I'm R75. I was born in 1981.
by Anonymous | reply 121 | September 10, 2023 9:20 PM |
I'm the pantyhose.
by Anonymous | reply 122 | September 10, 2023 9:21 PM |
I'm a Johnny Carson suit for Sears.
by Anonymous | reply 123 | September 10, 2023 9:22 PM |
I'm the watercooler discussion of the latest episode of All in the Family.
by Anonymous | reply 124 | September 10, 2023 9:35 PM |
Per R78 I am the pet filing cabinet of the boss’s son Lance who is supposed to be bootstrapping thru the company.
He has rammed all of his misplaced, non alphabetized files in the back. This time saver makes him feel ingenious and gives Lance the boost he needs to flirt with the prettiest secretary.
He doesn’t know she’s his dad’s mistress til she takes him to her shared apartment and he finds dad’s monogrammed hankerchief in her bathroom. Hilarity ensues.
by Anonymous | reply 125 | September 10, 2023 9:51 PM |
I'm the polyester pantsuit with a tunic-length top. Women are now allowed to wear pants in the office with the caveat that the ass is covered.
by Anonymous | reply 126 | September 10, 2023 10:02 PM |
I'm the groovy threads the cool cats in the office are wearing. Can you dig it?
by Anonymous | reply 127 | September 10, 2023 10:03 PM |
I'm the fax machine. I'm the only one in the whole building and I have a special office that secretaries have to come to numerous times a day to pick up faxes. They hate it when they get that call "you have a fax."
by Anonymous | reply 128 | September 10, 2023 10:32 PM |
I’m the receptionist who transfers the call from the boss’s wife, Mrs. William Mitchell.
Only this time she’s referred to herself as Ms. Dotty Mitchell. I smell divorce.
by Anonymous | reply 129 | September 10, 2023 10:32 PM |
I'm Mr. Coffee. I was a big modern deal when I first arrived. The secretary gets stuck making coffee in me every morning even though she drinks hot tea.
I have never been cleaned and I am full of mold. Ha ha.
by Anonymous | reply 130 | September 10, 2023 10:39 PM |
I'm the expectation of every straight man in the office that every woman's lady garden should be the size of a slice of New York pizza!
by Anonymous | reply 131 | September 10, 2023 10:54 PM |
I'm Ms. Ann Romano and I'm not wearing a bra.
by Anonymous | reply 132 | September 10, 2023 10:57 PM |
I’m the other gay guy on the 13th floor—the one who knows not to drink poppers—REAL poppers. I wonder what will 21st century gays will think of poppers?
by Anonymous | reply 133 | September 10, 2023 11:02 PM |
R130 Why WAS Mr. Coffee such a big deal when it arrived? Was it the first countertop coffeemaker? Did people have to make coffee on the stove before then?
by Anonymous | reply 134 | September 10, 2023 11:07 PM |
I'm the Dixie riddle cups at the water cooler.
by Anonymous | reply 135 | September 10, 2023 11:31 PM |
I'm the photocopy of Hank from accounting's cock and balls that got jammed in the machine.
by Anonymous | reply 136 | September 10, 2023 11:36 PM |
R134 Joe DiMaggio!
by Anonymous | reply 137 | September 11, 2023 12:42 AM |
R136 He got his cock and balls jammed in the machine? I wonder if all that weird green light rendered him sterile.
by Anonymous | reply 138 | September 11, 2023 12:56 AM |
I'm the payphone in the lobby of the building, there for when you want to make personal calls.
by Anonymous | reply 139 | September 11, 2023 1:02 AM |
You’re a day late and a dollar short R139
Read b4 posting.
by Anonymous | reply 140 | September 11, 2023 1:05 AM |
I am the mysterious, locked door on the first floor. I am pristine as if nobody has opened me for decades, at least since the last time I was painted. In reality, inside me is the PBX system. Dial 9 for an outside line.
by Anonymous | reply 141 | September 11, 2023 1:08 AM |
I'm the big red button in the Vax computer room that says do not pull.
by Anonymous | reply 142 | September 11, 2023 1:26 AM |
I"m the code you have te enter in at the copier to make sure they are charged to the right department.
I am the comforting sound of the IBM Selectrix at reception.
I'm the midnight blue shag carpeting in receiption and the gold trim on the receiption desk.
by Anonymous | reply 143 | September 11, 2023 3:39 AM |
I’m the secretaries gathering around the break room TV to catch the finale of “The Secret Storm” in 1974.
by Anonymous | reply 144 | September 11, 2023 4:25 AM |
Mr. Coffee was the first home drip brewer, R134. Before that, people used percolators. The drip brewers were simpler to use and produce a smoother flavor.
by Anonymous | reply 145 | September 11, 2023 5:15 AM |
I’m the local business-sponsored wall calendar.
by Anonymous | reply 146 | September 11, 2023 5:32 AM |
I'm Kathee Joy, Head Receptionist. I'm so busy yakking about my fab evening at the roller disco to anyone who pretends to listen . Meanwhile, the girls in the steno pool have to pick up all the calls I'm ignoring due to sharing my riveting account.
by Anonymous | reply 147 | September 11, 2023 5:45 AM |
I'm the hot dog vendor on the street. The only street food available.
by Anonymous | reply 148 | September 11, 2023 8:12 AM |
I’m Karl the elevator operator.
by Anonymous | reply 149 | September 23, 2023 1:16 AM |
We’re gold chains.
Around necks.
On the men. Lots of gold chains.
by Anonymous | reply 150 | September 23, 2023 1:19 AM |
I’m Helen, handsome wife to Dick in sales. He spanked me with a belt for overcooking the pork chops I served to his boss at dinner. What would he do if he knew the boss pinched my derrière?
by Anonymous | reply 151 | September 23, 2023 1:29 AM |
I'm the pre MeToo Shenanigans
by Anonymous | reply 152 | September 23, 2023 1:31 AM |
I'm R66's macrame plant holder.
by Anonymous | reply 153 | September 23, 2023 1:37 AM |
I'm Bonnie, the secretary who, sixteen years ago, when Mister Peters asked me to take his shirts to the dry cleaners in the lobby, asked 'Would you like me to take your pants down too?'
Every fucking day since then some clown says 'Hey Bonnie! You wanna take my pants down?'
by Anonymous | reply 154 | September 23, 2023 1:39 AM |
I’m the Xerox room.
by Anonymous | reply 155 | September 23, 2023 8:46 AM |
I'm Ms. Mullins, diligently cutting a stencils for the mimeograph machine. We're a smaller office, and the boss is too cheap to buy a photocopier.
by Anonymous | reply 156 | September 23, 2023 3:17 PM |
I'm the aforementioned Xerox machine. I am actually branded with the name Xerox. I am a prima donna supreme. I break at the slightest rough touch. I put stripes on copies when the whim strikes me.
When my copies become grey, the whole office gives me a wide berth because no one wants the filthy job of trying to change my toner.
My repairman has become a permanent fixture in the office, on a first-name basis with many of the staff.
by Anonymous | reply 157 | September 23, 2023 3:29 PM |
I'm Mrs. Wiggins.
by Anonymous | reply 158 | September 23, 2023 11:09 PM |
I'm the ubiquitous Earth Tones, in all the decor and on everyone's clothes! So what if I only flatter 10% of the population, I'm mandatory!
by Anonymous | reply 159 | September 23, 2023 11:18 PM |
I'm obese hawgs.
I'm nowhere to be seen. Shirley, the executive secretary to the CFO, is what you might call "chunky," but she's about 50.
Cigarettes, black coffee, dexedrine, and good ol' peer pressure keep the rest of the guys & gals slim.
by Anonymous | reply 160 | September 23, 2023 11:34 PM |
I’m the hard candy dish at the reception desk
by Anonymous | reply 161 | September 23, 2023 11:44 PM |
I'm the pink while you were out message pads.
by Anonymous | reply 162 | September 24, 2023 12:37 AM |
[quote]Cigarettes, black coffee, dexedrine, and good ol' peer pressure keep the rest of the guys & gals slim.
Some of us prefer the chewy chocolate appetite suppressant Ayds. Others are trying the Grapefruit Diet.
by Anonymous | reply 163 | September 24, 2023 1:22 AM |
It's Monday and I'm Patty and Grace, the two Catholic, separated, secretaries on this floor, both mid 30s, wearing kind of sexy dresses and good makeup, talking about their kids reactions to folk mass at the modern red brick Catholic Church in their recently completed surburban neighborhood built to house the employees of this reasonably enlightened company that could be Texas Instruments or IBM or Xerox. Grace, from a good if modest family downtown, now lives in an apartment complex which has a racy reputation for swingers, some working class trash, and interracial mixing and she has gay friends who invite her disco dancing.
by Anonymous | reply 164 | September 24, 2023 1:40 AM |
I'm the WATS line for free long distance calls that everybody uses to call relatives across the country when the boss is at lunch.
by Anonymous | reply 165 | September 24, 2023 2:09 AM |