Lesbians of DL: What if she has an ugly pussy? (inspired by the 'What if he has an ugly penis?' thread)

Note: other miscellaneous DL cognoscentes of vagine are welcomed to partake.

What IS an ugly pussy? The ones I’ve seen look the same.

Are you a lesbian, R2?

No but I’ve seen a few

Unless you saw them in want, it does not count. I've seen a few myself, and all I recall is something like a hairy, oozing, unattended wound, which is why my opinion on the matter is not terribly useful—for the same reason that lesbians are not often surveyed on the aesthetic appeals of peen.

Dollface thread 💕

My lady poosie is irresistible by my gentleman callers.

Lesbians? Good Lawdy NO!!!

Not really the same thing, OP

The same thing as what, R8?

Guess.

I could not be less titillated by your offer, R10.

I like a woman with a really beautiful, meaty vagine. Hung like a doughnut.

Gross.

Is a meaty vagine a puffy one, a heavily-draped one, or simply one that comes with a gunt?

…….

[quote]Is a meaty vagine a puffy one, a heavily-draped one, or simply one that comes with a gunt?

Puffy. Like a giant butterflied boneless chicken breast.

A GIANT one? Where are you finding these mutant, amazon puffers?

Stupid question. All pussies are beautiful

Oh ew

There some women who have such small pussies they are almost non existent. Tiny tiny tiny. I have always wondered if that is the equivalent of having a small dick. Too little to play with. Or, if for many straight men, it’s preferred.

An ugly pussy is a smelly pussy

[quote]ugly pussy

Redundant.

And you thought this would be a good topic for DL why, OP?

Hey, I'm just trying to include our resident sapphic sisters in the dialog, buddy. I'm not going to apologize for being on the right side of herstory.

Apparently they are either more sexless than previously thought or have just been absorbed by ElderLez.

Anyone know this movie? I remember seeing it on TV in 2001-2002. Like a western movie and everyone's dressed like little house on the prairie. This scene where someone opens the door and finds these two women kissing and one says they're in love?

Another scene where an old lady says if you want to if you don't want to have a baby you have to pull out.

Damn, you guys are assholes.

But then again, you already knew that.

Straight guys complain about beef curtains. I googled it and that is indeed horrific

My first grade teacher had a beautiful pussy. Unfortunately, I couldn't do anything about it because I was only 6 years old.

We renovate it -- including with high-grade Astroturf, if need be.

^ love it.

If she has a hot pickup truck all is forgiven.

But we still love you, R26.

R5 You forgot the teeth

R25 You alright, lovie? Is there someone we can call for you?

Teefs

There's no such thing as an ugly pussy on a beautiful woman. Lesbians know this.

Ladybugs on and surrounding the lady-poosie have my gentleman callers strutting and crowing like roosters.

I was watching a porn once where the vagina looked like a roast beef sandwich from Arby’s. With Horsey sauce!

If a woman is beautiful, classy, well-dressed, smells good, is well coiffed, has clean, healthy teeth and is very lady-like, then her pussy is going to be magnificient. If she's frumpy, stay away from her pussy.

[quote]clean, healthy teeth

Upstairs or downstairs teeth?

So, for lesbians, the woman makes the pussy. For gay men, the cock makes the man.

I’ve got a few horror stories…

Next on news at 10, people with peanut allergy will be interviewed about the wonderful flavor profile of peanut butter.

All vaginas look like someone walked up to a smooth portion of skin, stabbed it a few times while twisting the knife, and then walked away. They are all repulsive.

All penises look like mutant alien mushrooms that squirt out sticky white goo when excited.

Dear vag disparagers, just think of your mom’s labia giving you a cranial massage on your way into the world!

Egomaniac @ R43— There be lady lovers afoot in these parts too, in case you were unawares. And the question was geared towards them.

R44 I'm going to take a wild guess and say you, sir, are no lesbian.

Romantic

Purdy Poosie

R36 and R39 have it.

Masculine straight guys love pussy

Long lips sink ships!

*pats R52's head*

My poosey is mostt ecspensive esquisite. Is very clean.

Why aren't there any women named Pussy? There are plenty of men named Dick.

Every pussy I've ever have the pleasure to encounter has been a unfolding wonder to me. Each is unique and perfect in it's own special way. What I really love more than anything is the way they change colour and shape and smell as you caress them and find what pleases them most. They unfold their secrets for you and engulf you in pleasure. I am a lesbian by the way (just in case you were wondering).

R56 There was Poussey Washington—Orange is the New Black's most beloved lesbian character.

R57 How many pussies have you encountered?

63.

R57

R57 also has it.

Joshine Hawlee

R59 I'm part of a tantric group in the UK, so in terms of numbers, definitely three figures and possibly four (but I've not been counting). Yet to meet one that I don't find attractive and mesmerizing! I've also encountered a ton of penises or all varieties but although I can appreciate their aesthetics they just don't hold the same allure for me. Heading to bed now so if I don't reply again I'm not hiding, just sleeping.

R64 has encountered more pussy than k.d. lang, Anne Lister and Cleopatra all together. Love it.

All pussy is disgusting.

[quote]What if she has an ugly pussy?

Is there another kind?

It’s really squishy and sloppy when wet. Trust me I’ve fisted a woman. I know.

^^^^

How apt that we now have secret pussy lover Paris Hilton illustrating this thread - the above must be her exact face when she encounters cock, quite frankly.

Paris munches rug?

Links pls!

She pings.

This will really blow your minds gay men. Pussies can be innies or outies. Just like belly buttons. Outies are the ones that looks like Arby's roast beef. They are the beef curtains. Regular innies are very attractive.

^ are 'outies' like a prolapse?

You people are so stupid.

Thank r75 now I’ll be having nightmares

Outies are just labia minora extending past the labia majora rather than being hidden.

Beef curtains are loose floppy pussy lips. Real fleshy n nasty.

Bisexual here to give you all the truth:

Unless there is a major hygiene problem, all pussy is beautiful pussy

Penises are not generally that attractive but when they are inside you, which is what they are for, you cannot see them so who cares

I love it when the roast beef goes past the bread.

Dear R70: can I be one of your BFFs?

R79 lies

[Quote] problem, all pussy is beautiful pussy

R79 lies

R79 bisexual man or woman?

In my experience, R79, when one has a penis inside, not only can't one see it - one cannot also feel a damn thing.

She's a woman, R84. Watch.

They can't look worse than my back end does after an exuberant weekend with the Lacrosse Twins.

But eventually things recover (somewhat).

And at that point I guess lady hoo-hoos claim the demolition-pit prize, at least until next weekend.

Not that that's what you demanded, OP, "Ladies Only" threads are a little.... you know.

Erma was ugly and fat. Her pussy stunk so bad during the summer. I offered to buy her some carpet fresh if she’d promise to use it before work. She declined and the office suffered.

A few yrs ago I convinced a straight married guy to switch to anal due to how nasty pussy is

It’s not a real pussy until you have a mons and a pleasant peanut clit!

I had a female friend who worked at a prison as a correctional officer (prison guard). Whenever new inmates come into the prison, they are subject to a cavity search (to prevent drug smuggling). My friend said that she saw a lot of pretty women with busted-up pussies. She didn't get into further detail.

That was a women's prison where my friend worked.

My tiny lady hinny 🐞 🐞 🐞

R85 / Lipstick Lesbian, do you sometimes have sex with men as well? Or are you talking abt a time in your life when you didn’t identify as lesbian?

I experimented with men when I was younger, R93, to see if I could feel anything. I couldn't. I remember doing it with a male friend and then turning to him and saying, when it was over: "I think I'm a lesbian". I tried it a couple other times with a couple other men, and... I really am a lesbian.

R88 yeah because shit isn't disgusting at all.

[quote] What if she has an ugly pussy?

Is there any other kind?

R64 you encountered four figures of pussies? Holly shit. What type of tantric group is that exactly? Do you identify as gay or bi?

All pussies are beautiful when they squirt. I screen guys before I confess this.

R70 She's not a secret pussy lover. I'm sure she open about hooking up with girls in her drunken twenties. And why would she be disgusted by a penis? She's married to a man. You made her sound like she some closeted lesbian or something.

I can’t imagine such a thing - only a fat chick or a medical case could possibly have an ugly pussy. I don’t mind longer labia, etc. I know some of my kin really take issue with that. If she’s hot - I’m guaranteed to find her pussy really hot. I seriously just can’t imagine what would make a pussy ugly to me besides some fat cow

Bless your heart, R99.

The best part about those long lips in R75 is that they are completely hairless. If a girl does't groom to your liking it's okay because no hair where you lick.... just wash it first! R57 your writing turns me on.

R101 No, bless your delusional heart. Are you that Brazilian lesbian that thinks all female celebrities are gay? You are like a female version of NateCrnkovich

For those wondering, R103 is over at the Camilla Belle thread insisting that Maria Sharapova is straight.

😁😁😁

For those wondering R104 thinks Paris Hilton and Maria Sharapova are gay nad in fake marriages for some reason. Who else Britney Spears, Taylor Swift, Pamela Anderson, Ivanka Trump?

[quote] Taylor Swift

😁😁😁

I'm not even a lesbian and I know that Paris Hilton is gay.

This thread compared with the 'ugly penises' one has convinced me that gay men are superficial shitheads.

R108 men? Determining sex appeal with their eyes? Well I never!

R107 Yeah, nothing like a lesbian that went through an army of cocks. Some even in front of the camera. Very lesbionic thing to do

R106 I just knew you were a Gaylor, by your delusional ramblings

R110 Hilton has said many times that she believed herself to be asexual because she never enjoyed doing anything with men but making out with them. And this is her new husband. Have you ever seen such gay face?

Also, Paris and Carter used a surrogate to create their child. They didn't even need their bodies touching to make it happen.

[quote] this is her new husband

That is a homosexual.

Paris Hilton is a known bi. She had the leaked photos and the sex tape. The best friend photos with them topless at the pool.

She likes sex with people who cares?

R112 That's what 1/2 of straight women believe. Ask any random straight woman if she enjoys sex with men and you will be astounded by their answers. She had no reason to marry a beard since there's zero gay rumors about her. Hell there aren't any kind of rumors about her these days, she's a hasbeen. Can't believe we are discussing one of the most dick hungry women in the recent history being gay

R113 Like half of Hollywood couples these days. Especially if they 35yo+

R116 That is absolutely not what 1/2 of straight women believe.

R118 You need to talk to more straight women. For half of them, sex is a chore

I imagine if you’re a lesbian, even the ugliest of vag will still be infinitely preferable to a predatory trans “woman” complete with “lady penis”.

Straight women who think of sex as a chore don't do so with the belief that they're asexual, but with the understanding that most straight men are fucking terrible in bed.

It’s an interesting question though. As a gay man I obviously have an affinity for penis, but damn, I have on occasion seen really ugly looking penises, including one that actually left me scratching my head wondering “what the heck even IS that”.

R121 said it before I could, lol

R112 So the guy already has a child with another woman. How gay of him.

Paris Hilton gay? AHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

What is Kari Lake?

In 2005, Paris Hilton's phone was hacked and the pictures linked below were leaked. For those not in the know, that is lesbian MTV VJ Eglantina Zingg, who is also the mother of Ricky Martin's children (she's the egg donor). Pressed for comment, Paris said the following to US Weekly back then: "We were joking around at a photo shoot for a magazine. It wasn't sexual... But it's scary that someone out there can get into your private device."

I remember taking similar pictures on my cell phone with some of my exes, only I had the clarity not to be topless.

Pam Anderson doesn’t ping at all R125.

Oh - and when my nipples are that hard and my hips are bucked toward a woman like that, while she has her tongue in my mouth, I'm about to have sex. I don't about the rest of you, though.

^don't know

Lipstick, you have to be the horniest lesbian alive! It's funny to hear someone on DL going on and on about the beauty of women and fucking them.

I was really just referencing the Paris/Eglantina picture(s), but perhaps I should tone it down, then. Yes, women are beautiful. It makes me desperate how beautiful they are, and how they make me feel - I wish I were naturally ascetic.

Anyhow, maybe refraining from expressing my wonder will go some way towards not feeling things so intensely (or maybe I'm just fooling myself).

^Perhaps ElderLez R128 could help me.

ElderLez, what readings might you recommend for someone pursuing asceticism?

Don’t lesbians give up on sex pretty quickly?

Sadly Lipstick asceticism isn’t one of my strong suits and I am rather enjoying your posts.

r108 Yes, we are. That's why so many of us die alone. I have a long time partner, but I settled, looks wise, for a man who could challenge me intellectually. No regrets.

[quote] I am rather enjoying your posts

= "I might even help you, if seeing you flail didn't amuse me"

🥲

Isn’t some pussy new and pristine, and shaped/carved to near perfection? Caitlyn’s pussy hasn’t gone through the decades of wear and tear as evident with almost all others at senior age. A surgeon may have sculpted Caitlyn’s pussy to have appropriate tightness, wrinkle-free, and symmetry for the full dimension.

R134 Not really. Lesbian bed death is not as much of a phenomenon as people think. It’s just that lesbian sex can go on for hours/days so it can be hard to clear your schedule for it

We <3 you, Lipstick lesbian, you marvelous slut. Never change.

[quote] lesbian sex can go on for hours/days

One vows to refrain, then a bitch goes and hits 'Post' on this^.

God help me.

Do lesbians shave/wax their nethers more or less often than straight women? You'd think more because they're obviously being serviced far more often than straight ladies, but also less because they're not subject to the male gaze.

What R140 said.

Lindsay Lohan, Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears all also fucked/dated women back in those days. Does that mean they are all lesbians?

Lindsay Lohan yes

Christina Aguilera is deeply closeted.

I feel for Lindsay. Smell her covering Stevie Nicks' "Edge of Seventeen", like any good dyke naturally would:

Ewww

I have never fucked a woman. I am a straight lady.

^^^^

Poor Lindz would have undoubtedly remained a proud lesbian had she not been forced to peddle her wares to Saudi Bros.

R128, you obviously don't understand sarcasm ElderLez.

I understand the intended sarcasm R150, but the fact that you think Pam Anderson and Paris Hilton ought to be grouped together kind of undermines your your intended impact.

It’s like we were telling you Gwyneth Paltrow was Jewish and then you made a sarcastic comment that we probably think Joni Mitchell is Jewish too because I don’t know; you can’t tell blondes apart.

Paris Hilton's husband does seem gay. There are other factors pointing to her being a lesbian, especially if you consider her background. The women in that family (Paris's mother and the mom's sisters, Kyle and Kim) all started early with marriage and children. Not just one or two children, but three or four.

Paris waits until she's around 40 to marry a gay man and have a baby via surrogate.

Britney Spears did an on TV interview where she talked about Christina Aguilera coming up to her in a club and sticking her tongue in her mouth. Britney did not seem happy about it.

That coupled with the fact that Christina has been spotted in lesbian bars is pretty good confirmation for me.

[quote]So the guy already has a child with another woman. How gay of him.

Indeed. I for one cannot think of a single gay man who's ever fathered a child with a woman.

Sam Ronson (female) seemed like Lindsay Lohan's most serious partner. Now, LL is trying to say they were just friends.

I can believe that Xtina is solidly bisexual, but I can't imagine an inveterate lesbian waxing poetic about cum-gobbling like she has. They might gush about their husband being a "wonderful person" or say something as awkward as Paris did ("I actually like hooking up with my husband!"), but claiming to be a total cumslut seems like unnesseary overkill considering most straight women can barely stomach it.

Christina Aguilera's first husband seemed like a nice guy, but the combo was a head-scratcher, IMO. I can believe she's a lesbian or bisexual leaning towards women. I think she did have a crush on Britney. I think she was also understandably resentful of Britney's career when she (Christina) was obviously the better singer.

[quote] I can't imagine an inveterate lesbian waxing poetic about cum-gobbling like she has.

I can.

R155 She's so full of shit. She was absolute trash for Sam Ronson. It was a toxic relationship for sure, but they were batshit in love.

R158, it does seem callous to now disavow the relationship. Lohan's life is in constant turmoil & shambles, but it was especially so during the time she was with Ronson. I think Ronson probably helped her through a hard time in her life.

Agreed ^

Hate to tell you guys this but a) bisexual women not only exist but probably are the majority of women and b) even the straight ones usually want to give it a go at least once before they settle down into heterosexual boredom with some two-pump chump

r161 Most of the straight women only want to try another woman because they want to know what an actual orgasm feels like.

Ha, but we talk about how gross vag is, we're the evil ones.

This thread needs pics.

Every lesbian knows what this means.

God, Christina looked like such a skank in that era, at R165, yet it is probably her most recognizable look. I always thought she got picked on for being a slut, so she talked up her virginity. Mariah Carey did the same thing. But then Mariah's sister is an actual prostitute, so I figured she was trying to distinguish herself.

Do lesbians "lose their virginity" to each other? If so, how?

Stop, just stop

r166 Lemme guess, you believe it's only "real sex" when it involves penile penetration of a hole, and a woman who has never had sex with a man is a virgin by default.

The epitome of early aughts Christina...

[quote] [R166] Lemme guess, you believe it's only "real sex" when it involves penile penetration of a hole, and a woman who has never had sex with a man is a virgin by default.

Actually, no. I was looking at the photo attached to R165's post in tandem with what R165 wrote. It seems more like Christina (if she is a lesbian) is saying that she's not getting penetrated with a penis, hence, she'd be the last to lose her virginity.

r170 I was just going by your question:

[quote]Do lesbians "lose their virginity" to each other? [bold]If so, how?[/bold]

That said, the "last one to lose her virginity" comment from a lesbian perspective usually means that due to not having any interest in boys as teen girls, we usually don't find ourselves in situations where we'd end up having sex with them until much later than our straight female peers if it ever happens, at all.

And due to the fact that we live in a heteronormative society, we're taught that losing our virginity is "supposed to" happen with a guy; the gender we're not especially enthused about sharing that with by default even if we don't initially realize that the reason for this "cherry popping" is because we're not sexually attracted to men.

^ *cherry popping delay

Got it, R171. That makes sense. But I would genuinely like to know how lesbians lose their virginity to a woman. Or is "losing virginity" (popping cherry) even a concept for lesbians (as it is for hetero women). Not trying to insult anybody. Just figured that this would be an opportunity to get some opinions on this.

Lesbians of DL?

It is an improvement over those vulgar drag queens at Disney.

R146 You are delusional

R145 It's called bisexuality

Zoran has woken up, y'all.

Take a walk, Zoran.

R173 this is only confusing to you because in your mind the definition of “sex” has to involve a penis going into a vagina. Sex involves lots of things. Hands. Mouths. Toys. Accoutrements. Use your imagination. The presence of an orgasm is what makes it sex.

Also, the concept of “virginity” itself is a falsehood designed to sell child brides to patriarchs with the understanding that there is no chance any child those brides would produce would be from any other patriarchal lineage

So no…lesbians do not give that much of a shit about “virginity” actually

R178, no, I’m not confused because I think sex involves a penis going into a vagina. Geez. I just thought that maybe lesbians had a common concept of what it meant to do some type of ultimate sexual act. Yes, I know the concept of virginity is sexist and patriarchal.

But I appreciate the rest of your answer and that was what I was looking for.

R179, my first-ever sexual experience was with a woman. We had sex a few times over the course of a few months, and she never penetrated me, nor did I penetrate her. Like R178 said, hands, mouths etc. A couple of years later, I had sex with a man for the first time and he penetrated me and broke my hymen, or "popped my cherry", as one might say. That's most certainly NOT when I lost my virginity - I lost it with that first woman.

'Virgin' comes from Latin and originally meant "young woman with no sexual experience". Which is interesting, because nowhere can you find there the concept of having a hymen or not, of having been penetrated or not. It's just a matter of "[not] having sexual experience". Of course, this doesn't mean that people who spoke Latin back in the day lived in a non-patriarchal society (they mostly did). It's just that 'virgin' [italic]doesn't[/italic] originally mean "woman with a hymen", or "woman who has never been penetrated", it simply means "[young] woman with no sexual experience".

Something to think about.

R151, ElderLez, I was comparing Paris Hilton to Pamela Anderson because they're both whores, not because they're blonde.

I think you mean sluts R181. It’s hard to imagine an Hilton heiress as a whore; more likely she’d be the customer.

Well, then, that's not very smart, R181 - Pamela Anderson is one million times the whore that Paris Hilton ever was. Think about it. Pam Anderson = Whore of Babylon who was a Playboy Bunny in the Playboy Mansion; Paris Hilton = publicity whore who says she thought she was "asexual", as she didn't enjoy "doing anything with men", apart from "making out" (not the best PR decision to put that out there if she's trying to appear straight).

I mean, really.

By the way, I like Pamela Anderson. She's unapologetic.

Why is this interesting, inoffensive and active thread showing up with gray lines through it? I'm new around here and confused.

Help, please?

Because somebody doesn't like lesbians, R185. Will of the people. They FF it to no end, and then we get the gray lines.

Two pump chump. R162, may I steal that for my next conversation about sex with men?

LL, thank you for explaining. FFS how could anyone not love this thread?

I don't see any lined-out posts. Adjust your settings to asbestos eyeballs if you want that stuff to disappear.

Some people don't like the Lebanese, R188.

R189 has it. Go to Settings/Permissions --> Flames & Freaks --> set your tolerance level to Asbestos Eyeballs. That way, you won't see any gray lines anymore.

Oh, I see now! I've been reading DL for years but only recently started posting, so didn't have this wonderful help. Thank you.

You're not dumb, R191. You should post away, and ask for help when you need it. All of the other people here do.

It worked! Thank you, R189 and Lipstick Lesbian.... Looking forward to my future of unencumbered and uncensored reading amusements!

You're very welcome, R193. Do I "know" you? I like you.

Never mind. I just checked ignoredar to see "who" you are. Of course I like you. We need to stop bumping into each other like this (and with that I mean we should KEEP on bumping into each other like this. Forever).

Is it okay to eat beef curtains if you're vegan?

I'm the OP of this thread and am just now learning that apparently I've been FF'd for it (although it doesn't appear greyed out to me). What the shit, DL! I can't imagine what I've ever said here or elsewhere on the site that could have pissed off someone enough to do that. I'm kind of hurt. 😢

[quote] I can't imagine what I've ever said

You started a thread for the Lebanese to discuss vagine, OP.

Oh, dear, LL, I've been found out! (Happily so!)

I've just watched the Paris Hilton sex tape for the first time - had never seen it. Poor thing seems miserable sucking on that cock: while she's at it, she either has a blank expression or looks like she's about to puke, and when she stops for a second to glance at the guy, she looks disgusted. She tries to force a smile here and there, and the overall impression is that she's having an almost out-of-body experience, in the worst possible way.

Why, God, why? The things women put themselves through / are put through / are expected to do. Dear God in heaven.

Poor wittle Paris was miserable sucking on that cock. So she was like 90% of straight and bi women that suck cock.

Hello, Zoran R201. As usual, you don't know what the hell you're talking about.

On a separate note: this is a GAY GOSSIP forum. Why do you spend your days here, reprimanding GAY people for GOSSIPING?

I truly don't understand what you're doing in this board.

Who the hell is Zoran?

Just like we call the Russian posters "Dmitri" and "Vladimir", we're now calling you (our resident Croat pest) "Zoran". I can't believe I've had to explain this to you.

Answer the question. Why do you spend your days here, on a GAY GOSSIP forum, reprimanding GAY people for GOSSIPING?

^ are you insane?

FF your tedious, evasive ass, R205. I invite everyone else to do the same.

Alrighty then

Muriel, if you're reading this: please ban this HOMOPHOBIC piece of shit (R207, R205, R203, R201 etc. etc. etc.).

r206 I'm pretty sure r205 et al is the bi or straight guy on DL who's infatuated with lesbians for some reason. I think he's fallen for one too many lesbians, so any suggestion that an attractive woman is a lesbian is triggering for him. Pity.

How am I homophobic? Cause i don't think Paris Hilton is a lesbian 😂

R209 There's a ton of pretty women that are lesbians. That's what I said million times here while others were making jokes about being...(insert unflattering stereotypes). Also, I don't find Paris Hilton or Britney Spears hot, so your assumption makes no sense.

Yes, that's the one, R209. He is a motherfucker from Croatia who is an anti-gossip / anti-gay / anti-lesbian / anti-woman / anti-logic piece of trash.

FF all of this idiot's posts.

Ladies are transitioning into lesbians everywhere!

Anti gay, anti woman? I am the one that is defending women on here where 90% of posters are sexist and misogynistic. You truly are nuts. You are the one that should be banned for spreading lies and trying to get people banned.

r212 I don't know about a poster from Croatia (haven't been on DL for barely 2 years), but I ignoredarred him and didn't see anything particularly "troll-like" or off-putting, to me. That said he's obviously a male that is attracted to females and seems to be especially fascinated by lesbians. That's all I got from that little journey.

Ewww, MTG with tRudy & Stevie Bannon

It's the same person, R215. When ignoredar loads enough of his older posts, you can see him writing in Croatian (because he can't do his namecalling in English when he's speaking to male posters - smell him; too much of a coward for that) and stating that he is from that country. He's in bad luck, though, because I can speak his language, and I know his kind.

Every chance he gets, in myriad threads, he asks me directly if I fuck men. As in, he namechecks me and asks me if I "sometimes fuck men", or have I done so in the past, or have I ever identified as bisexual, and so on and so forth. What gives?

FF this scourge.

You are a lunatic

r217 Which posts are in Croatian? Ignoredar only loads posts from threads that you've also participated in, so I can't see everything.

R218, uzmi svoje stvari i gubi se odavde. Dosta nam je tvojih gluposti.

R219, they might be too old to appear on your ignoredar feed. Give me one second. Meanwhile, sit back and watch this bitch panic. It's started.

Lol

R219, here we go. Thread linked below.

At R42, replying to a poster who had criticized the quality of his English, he says:

[quote] I'm from Croatia and had German as my second language in school I learned English watching tv shows and cartoons as a kid.. I would love to hear how good your knowledge of Croatian is. Show us....

At R49, replying to someone who had used Google Translate to call him a 'pussy' in Croatian, he says:

[quote] Bolje picka nego kurac

^Which means "Better a pussy than a dick". It sounds even more loaded (no pun intended) in Croatian than it does in English, too. What a class act!!!!!!!!!

r222 Hm. Interesting. Thank you.

Well then, r218, why exactly [italic]are[/italic] you on a gay site? And what's with the lesbian obsession? I noticed you in the other lesbian's AMA thread and did, indeed, find many of your questions odd for a presumed "gay" man to ask. Explain?

[quote]why exactly are you on a gay site? And what's with the [bold]lesbian obsession? [/bold]

Goddamn. Answered my own question.

Never mind.

R222 / R223, see how I spoke to him in perfect Croatian here at R220 and he didn't come for me. He can't. I'm not a random bitch who needs Google Translate to try and call him out on his BS - directly in his and his momma's language, in real time.

FF his tired Balkanic ass.

Lipstick Lesbian, did you time travel from 1992? Because nobody uses the term Lipstick Lesbian anymore. I bet you're a straight guy or a straight/bi girl looking for attention.

^I laughed.

Lesbians are the best at eating pussy. Everyone knows that.

I know someone who thought was a closeted lesbian until she met a guy she actually liked who had a big dick and amazing skills in bed. She finally knew what all the fuss was about. It was probably two decades of her thinking sex was overrated until she found that guy.

Straight woman getting in shape.

You know, now that we've been taking this vomit-inducing ride through Southeastern Europe for a few days, I wonder... When are we going to get an unhinged [bold]Greek[/bold] poster who'll insist that e.g. beautiful, sex-on-a-stick, known pussy lover Anna Vissi is straight? Because we're bound to.

Look at these two delicious dykes. No wonder this place is the home of the freakin' gods.

R230 What is she then?

What do you think she is, R232?

Never mind, R232. When you come back, you'll say she's straight. I have a day off, so I'm doing this. This is the last time I'm ever engaging with your miserable ass; I'm doing it, because I think it might make for an interesting post - for the actual lesbians in this thread.

Anna Vissi has spoken openly to the Greek press about her bisexuality, but even if she hadn't, one needs only to ponder the following: she's an activist for LGB rights in Greece and in Cyprus, and the amount of shit she's been getting for it for the last twenty years is unbelievable (she was already at it when nobody else of her stature was, regionally, and she just won't quit); of all the people in the world, she's BFFs with power lesbian costume designer Patricia Field (of Sex And The City fame).

You won't find any of this in English, so I'll translate, from the video linked below:

[quote] [bold]Interviewer[/bold]: You have stated (in print media) "I believe that all people, if they're being honest with themselves, will accept that they are bisexual". What did you mean by that, and were you not afraid of being misunderstood?

[quote] [bold]Anna Vissi[/bold]: I was philosophizing about human nature when I said that. I think that, yes, people would be much happier if they'd just let themselves be open, and I can be attracted to any person who is open. I wasn't trying to say anything shocking; I just think that if we all managed to embrace our bisexuality, we'd all be a lot happier. [she repeats and paraphrases herself at length] I think that this prejudiced society in which we live today, where gay people are being emphasized... [pauses] Regardless of how anyone feels about this, it's now fashionable to pretend you accept gays. I see folks who utter the word 'gay' and think they're doing something really great, you know? That, to me, is a crime, and it shouldn't be done. "Oh, let's not discuss this topic", but you see, what we're dicussing, to me, is homophobia.

[quote] [bold]I[/bold]: You can talk about that theoretically, it is nice and easy for you to do so, but in practice...

[quote] [bold]AV[/bold]: I'm not just speaking theoretically, though. I am not.

[quote] [bold]I[/bold]: In practice, however, we cannot imagine that you, whose relationships we have seen and so on, could respond to the love of a woman, say, because women must fall in love with you, for sure...

[quote] [bold]AV[/bold]: [smiles and blushes] Yes.

[quote] [bold]I[/bold]: You're a lovely creature.

[quote] [bold]AV[/bold]: [smiles] I'm honored (that women fall in love with me). [laughs nervously] Yes. What is your question? I don't understand it.

[quote] [bold]I[/bold]: I said you couldn't respond--[she interrupts him]

[quote] [bold]AV[/bold]: If I felt like it, I would do it, yes.

[bold]Well, DAMN!!!!!!! Who knew???????[/bold]

That interview was 10 years ago and, since then, girlfriend has graduated to being filmed holding women on her lap & French kissing them & flirting shamelessly with other dykes in sight, while spending significant amounts of time in New York hitting the scene. What else can I say?

Dear R209: imagine Zoran crying himself to sleep tonight. Thoughts and prayers.

Lipstick lesbian, are you NateCrnkovich's twin sister?

"I just think that if we all managed to embrace our bisexuality"

So you agree with her that all humans, including you, are bisexual?

[quote]I just think that if we all managed to embrace our bisexuality, we'd all be a lot happier.

Yeah, nah. I can't get behind what she's saying here, LL/r234. I am not, nor have I ever been, sexually attracted to men. And I actively [bold]tried[/bold] to be for years due to immense self-loathing and familial pressure to be "normal." It did nothing but cause mental health and issues along with physiological damage from penetration because men do not turn me on.

That said, I'm also asexual, but I am still capable of enjoying sex with women and am only romantically/emotionally attracted to women. I never enjoyed sex with men and actively hated even being touched by them. Their callous and rough hands, rough skin, body hair, their smells (not BO, just their personal masculine smells) made me physically ill. All people are not bisexual and I think that her stating this can actually be harmful to 100% gays and lesbians who may internalize that especially if they already suffer from self-loathing and struggle with accepting themselves like I did. My situation was so bad that it drove me to attempt suicide on multiple occasions. It was really, really, really, bad. Everyone is not bisexual. She is wrong.

What about like a cute boy that looks very girly? Or trans?

He's probably gay and would not want you!

Who knows and who care. Sex should not be something people kill themselves over

[quote]Sex should not be something people kill themselves over

Sex is not the reason why numerous gays and lesbians become suicidal. What an unbearably tone-deaf and idiotic response, r238. It's potentially dumber than this question:

[quote]What about like a cute boy that looks very girly? Or trans?

You've asked a similar question in another lesbian thread and also wrote this stupid shit here:

[quote]I know someone who thought was a closeted lesbian until she met a guy she actually liked who had a big dick and amazing skills in bed.

Once again, you've written something similar about "discovering the magic of dick" yourself in another lesbian thread. Let's get something clear: lesbians don't like dick. And the more you push this, the less I believe you're actually a gay man. No gay man is this obsessed with pushing a narrative that lesbians like dick.

I'm not behind it either, R237, it's BS. I was just arguing that well, looks like a dyke, talks like a dyke, flirts like a dyke, is now getting her PhD in lesbianism, God bless - it's a dyke.

I have my doubts she would say that on TV today (I actually think she's now gearing toward saying other things; I hope she is). But the fact that she said [italic]something[/italic] like that back in 2013 was yuuuuuuge for a place like Greece, where same-sex marriage is STILL not legal.

[quote] I'm also asexual, but I am still capable of enjoying sex with women

That doesn't make much sense, if you say you're asexual.

[quote] Their callous and rough hands, rough skin, body hair, their smells (not BO, just their personal masculine smells) made me physically ill

Yes, you are a homosexual. So am I. And so is Anna, from what I've been hearing and seeing - apparently, she doesn't deal with cock anymore, and good for her if she has discovered herself. It's been sixty-five years in the making. If she ever comes out publicly as a lesbian, the whole of Greece is going to go up in flames.

Go crazy, Anna Vissi.

[quote]That doesn't make much sense, if you say you're asexual.

r241 I'm not sexually attracted to anyone or anything (meaning people don't arouse me sexually, regardless of how emotionally and romantically connected I am to them) but am capable of enjoying the physical sensation of sex with a woman solely due to the physical stimulation and nothing else. This is not possible with a man for me as I am actively repulsed by them nor romantically or emotionally attracted to them.

R242, now I understand. Thank you for taking the time to explain.

I'm sorry you went through all that you did. I'm glad you've made it to the other side and are here with us. Screw the noise, the motherfuckers and the haters. What a considerably more deplorable place this (the world) would be with one less person such as yourself around in it, and I'm not being maudlin - just objective. You have presence and grace. Most of the rest of the people, well, not so much.

None of these mothers can ever you take you out. We <3 you, R242.

Y'all, the cutest butch lezzie in a motorcycle's just delivered my takeout salad. My heart filled with joy, and I just can't contain myself.

Thank you, Lord, for your many blessings. May the Baby J bring us all a beautiful lesbian a day, just like this.

r243 You're too kind, LL. I appreciate you. The feeling is certainly mutual! I do so enjoy your posts on here. I was especially tickled by how quickly you shut down our Croatian friend. He's been church mouse quiet ever since.

R241 So if it's looks like a dyke, talks like a dyke, flirts like a dyke it is apparently a bisexual, since that's what she is

This is something I fret about in regards to myself. I defo have the beef curtains, and one of my inner labia (right side) actually protrudes from the outer like a fleshy membrane or a wing. It looks like a post-pregnancy vag, which is mad because I'm childless virgin just out of my 20s?

Having never had sex or intimate contact with other people before, I don't even have testimonials positive or negative to gauge how it strikes people. Tbh I'm afraid of judgement about that, as I am about many other things about my physical and psychological--absurd, I know, considering the ugly morbid freaks in the world who have plenty of good sex, somehow, but it does play on my mind. Surgery is an option technically, but even if I had the money idk about going under the knife for cosmetic purposes, as I've seen and heard of girls getting septic after getting their shit sewn up, and that sounds even worse than having a lasagna pussy.

If I think about it too much, I really feel a bit monstrous and hideous. It's an intrusive thought that comes up more or less weekly if not daily, whenever I masturbate and even sometimes when bathing. Probably I need to do some image work, mental reframing, or just work on giving much less of a fuck (how????)

R247 You are worrying over something that a huge majority of men/gay women wouldn't even notice or care about

This whole thread is stupid because if you love someone you don't give a shit about their knobs and bits.

R249 I wasn't aware that loving someone before fucking them a requisite for every lesbian.

R244, are you the poster Lipstick lesbian or someone else?

*was requisite^

R250 straight and bicurious women often abide by that annoying stereotype, that's there's no way another woman could ever fuck-and-run on them, and that any lesbians will fall for them instantly and sweep them off their feet. It's like they've never heard of Shane McCutcheon.

R247, every woman has hang-ups about their appearance. Sometimes, something that bothers you won't necessarily bother other people.

Don't get stuck thinking that you should have a "porn star pussy". You're not a porn star. When you masturbate, just let go - give in to the sensation(s), and give in to yourself.

About the protruding inner labia, when you start having sex you'll find that's it's a delicious feeling having them sucked on, for example, as they're full of nerve-endings. You can actually begin to discover this by yourself when masturbating: wet your fingers and touch your inner folds, run the tips of your fingers through them - don't ignore them, explore them. There's so much pleasure that we, as women, "miss out" on having / feeling just because we don't think to touch certain parts of ourselves.

Get yourself wet and try it out - you won't regret it.

^you'll find that* it's a delicious feeling

Lipstick/R254, thank you for the encouraging words. Of course you're right. All this neurosis is unproductive and ridiculous. I do concur with Laura Mulvey that we women all have that 'male voyeur' in our head thanks to conditioning, and it causes us to self-objectify and criticise to a paralysing degree. Seeing ourselves beyond the p0rn lens is imperative.

In fact, I do masturbate sometimes in the way you suggest, and it can be pleasurable, though the intrusive thoughts still come at the same time. Though my focus is usually more on the vulva for reasons of preference, anyhow, so it isn't the end of the world.

r247, isn't this just like all things female related? you wish you had one HALF INCH (likely) less of a tiny hidden fleshy bit. I would be happy with half an additional inch of fleshy bit. I would like my toes longer, my lashes longer, my front teeth a bit shorter and there's no shame involved. but because it's a 'dirty shameful sexy' body part you feel shame. over an additional half inch of thin flesh. craziness. girl, get your fuck on with whatever flavor floats you.

Rescue-Chick and her beautiful turquoise-aqua blue eyes at R257 have a point, although it could have all been said more gently.

Remember that these good women here are lesbians, Rescue-Chick, which means that everything that's hard for you, as a woman, is always at least a little bit harder for them. That's not a stretch - it's just the way it is.

Just a PSA since we're on the topic...

[quote]Lesbians of DL: What if she has an ugly pussy?

If?

Someone should fetch R260 her smelling salts at once, as she's already looking lifeless on her fainting couch.

R258 That's not true, not all women here are lesbians. Bisexual and straight women are a huge majority. Unless, you are thinking about this thread alone. Still, I think most women posting here aren't gay. Either way, I don't agree that what's hard for straight women is a little bit harder for lesbians, since lesbians aren't as judgemental as straight men and wouldn't care about the looks of her potential partner or already existing partner's vagina. Lesbians and women in general aren't as superficial as men. So in this context, the vagina looks, lesbians actually have it easier than straight women.

FF clueless Zoran, the Croatian freak, at R262.

R259 thermal or laser 'rejuvenation therapy' as recommended in that article is fucking dangerous as well as ineffectual. The only result of this type of medical treatment is usually burns, scarring and necrosis. The FDA haven't ever approved any such device.

R263 You seem to be the freak since you are so obsessed with me. So FF yourself And what is clueless about what I wrote? You think that lesbians are as shitty, judgemental, superficial as straight men are?

r265 And you seem obsessed with lesbians. Why?

Look it up r65, it was approved for medical not cosmetic, but doctors are free to use it any way they want, and they do. You sound like your snatch may be dry and smelly, maybe you may need treatment yourself.

Excuse me, R267, I'm R65. I'm happy to inform you, ma'am, that mine, k.d. lang's, Anne Lister's and Cleopatra's cooters are all but dry and smelly; in fact, it's all exceedingly slick and rosy, to the point of mortal sin. With that said, I know you mistyped. Thank you, and God bless.

^(even the dead ones)

Lipstick lesbian is a high femme who probably has a partner who looks like Chaz Bono. Lipstick lesbians love and date other lipstick lesbians. You're new at this aren't you? You're a pretend know-it-all but you just left your boyfriend/husband for a big butch and now you think you can school everyone on lesbianism.

R270, say more.

R271, Go away fakebian and take your simulated heterosexuality with you.

As one told her lesbian friends in Croatia 🇭🇷, use a very good kroxldyphivc before scissoring.

R273 What?

Oh, R272. If only I had been able to "simulate" anything, in my entire life... I've been heartbroken about being conspicuously gay since I was born. I was a little girl who fell in love with other girls and couldn't hide it, couldn't help it, and, no matter how I dressed, I couldn't 'dress up' the gay. I've always been very delicate, very feminine; none of that ever prevented me from getting picked on, ostracized, chased down the street, passed up for jobs etc.

As an adult, I think I've always tried to look as beautiful as the women who'd catch my eye, so that I might catch theirs, and then perhaps they'd give me the time of day. I've always liked clothes, colors, make-up - in general, I try to feel good about whatever it is that I like. I like women, Lancôme and black garter belts. If that bothers you, or anyone else, it's really not my problem. I have enough on my plate trying to make a living and to survive in [italic]Brazil[/italic], of all places (I don't think I need to explain what that means).

Well, that was sad. But, like they say, "it is what it is".

r275, I'm thinking r272 is either a sock of the Croatian or yet another straight or bi guy obsessed with lesbians. Just a hunch. Calling women whores. Being sure to emphasize that "bisexuality exists." Vehemently being against suspicions that Paris Hilton is a lesbian. All of that screams angry straight or bi guy that women exist who want nothing to do with their dicks.

Sidebar: I randomly had a dream about Paris Hilton last night. It was odd.

R276 I never called women whores, unlike a lot of posters on this site, who I'm sure aren't "angry straight or bi guys". Also, I never claimed that lesbians don't exist or any other sexist and lesbophobic crap that the poster you are quoting wrote.

It's another guy, R276. I've already counted at least three different men here with the same range of obsessions. I know they're different people because of their syntax.

Yes, they're quite mad at the proposition that creatures such as you and I exist. They seem to be particularly upset by the notion that there exist feminine women in make-up and heels (the proverbial "lipstick lesbians") who only love and fuck other women. It's like someone shot them in the dick and then they got a seizure - it's simply [italic]unacceptable[/italic] to them. I have better things to do right now than to speculate about the reasons why it is so, but dear God. I'm reminded of the countless times I've heard things such as "But you're way too beautiful to be a lesbian", "Are you SURE you're a lesbian? Have you tried sleeping with men?", "Maybe you're just looking for attention" (we got a couple of instances of this one here in the thread), "Did someone hurt you [were you raped]?", "Were you abused as a child?", and the stupefying "Does that mean you don't like penetration? Maybe you just haven't been drilled right yet - I can help you with that".

[quote] I randomly had a dream about Paris Hilton last night

Oh, love. Was there vagine involved? I hope it was interesting / enjoyable, and not just odd, whatever it was.

Never trust Lipsticklesbian on here or Rescue check, all fakers.

^ sure, we are going to trust you Anonymous

I prefer lesbian Bigfoot.

More lesbian bigfoot

^^that there's a fackin' Samsquanch! A big dirty fucker! Probably a nine-footer we're dealin' with!

r278 I figured it was either a sock or another guy. Either way, their posts are bizarre and sad. I mean, it's not our fault they very likely ended up simping for a few lesbians that they are, no doubt, social media stalking to this day.

[quote]Oh, love. Was there vagine involved? I hope it was interesting / enjoyable, and not just odd, whatever it was.

The dream made absolutely no sense and I'm pretty sure it's because I read this thread right before going to bed. We were at a party and then Paris decided to storm out angry and I ran after her. Somehow we ended up in a cemetery and I randomly shouted, "Hey! My dad's buried here!" And then we both went to go visit his grave. Very weird.

^Well, damn. You're right it was odd. Intriguing.

Yahoo/slash has its detractors but I do think it’s eminently preferable to y/n author insert het fiction. For one, thr quality of the art or writing tends to be noticeably better for the former.

[quote][bold]Yahoo[/bold]/slash has its detractors

Did you mean "Yaoi" or "Yuri," here?

I think she meant to post that entirely in another thread, R287.

The ugliest cats are hairless, is it the same for vag?

The most lesbian answer is that if it's attached to someone you love, it's never ugly to you.

One trick is to grow bush over any ugly parts. Nature's veil.

If the love of my life had an ugly pussy, I would still love but I would for her vaginal rejuvenation.

Correction: I would still love HER

Correction 2: but I would PAY for her vaginal rejuvenation.

Damn I'm retarded this morning. No coffee yet. :-(

Vaginal rejuvenation?

Is that something Caitlyn Jenner went through?

In order to rejuvenate a vagine you first need to have one, R295.

Let’s pray R292 remains forever alone😕

R289, I wonder if you were serious there. I guess it depends, but I've never known any woman who ever thought a shaved pussy looked ugly.

Does it not please you? The sight, I mean.

Don’t open if offended by nudity

Anyway, this is confusing. Pretty or not?

r299 Of all of the naked female photos to choose from, why that one? Just...why?

Palette cleanser:

I see you, R300.

Can't say I don't love it.

r301 This is why I shouldn't mix gin and valerian tea. My dumbass meant "palate" cleanser, at r300. Goddamn.

Shaving helps reduce the odor and crustiness some pussies tend to develop.

R302, I'm not sure you should be mixing valerian tea with much of anything; I am sure you shouldn't be mixing it with alcohol, though, as it lowers your blood pressure and can be very dangerous. Please don't do it - we all want to continue enjoying pussy alongside you.

r304 Meh, I'll be aight. I've survived two overdoses in my day, and am still here to "grace" the DL with my "lovely" presence. I am apparently unkillable considering the cocktails I've taken.

Your concern is, however, appreciated, LL.

It's just the older we get, R305... you know what I'm talking about.

On a separate note, I love the sight of some slit.

A pussy is basically an entry system OP. Not the same thing. Pussy just has to be present. Dick has to be built a certain way. The standards are much higher.

The incels call becurtained girls ‘roasties’, which is so cutesy and childish. They’re never getting any of it ugly or pretty, no matter what playground insults they come up with to label it.

There’s never been a more inferiority-complexed, bitter, jealous and petty online subculture. And I include Reddit, the chans, K!w! & DL in that assessment.

Incels are creepy. My pussy is off limits to them.

R298/Lipstick yeah was just being facetious lol. Idk it was funny in my head at the time, and I posted it sleep deprived late at night iirc. Perhaps it didn't translate well as a joke. Hopefully no offense was taken!

Aesthetically and sexually speaking, I do prefer to see pussy than cock. It's just built nicer, it does more, it's less in-your-face and more inviting, it gets wetter and ripples and pulsates when you touch it...cute and sexy to me. Rarely do I watch p0rn anymore (ethically it sits poorly with me, too much systemic abuse and misogyny on parade), but when I do, if I'm looking at genitals at all then generally it's always the vagina. Or the tits, if they're good. Though it's hard not to compare bodies or feel bad about age or size when watching other women, do you find? It's that social conditioning, dammit. I'm always like, "she's beautiful and nubile and hot, and I'm...not" and then it's too depressing to get off lmao

Admittedly, I will appreciate and admire when a video shoots a man from behind so I can look at his booty & back, but that's about it. Actually, the only physical characteristics I can appreciate sexually on men are the back, the arse and the face/hair/eyes--a man with the trifecta is a 10 in my eyes. And charisma, social skills and common decency are even more important to me than that. If those don't impress, it doesn't matter much to me how big or toned or pretty the bulge, abs or arms/legs etc. are. Men get that so wrong when killing themselves in the gym to impress women, as generic muscles or cock size really don't mean a lot visually to most girls. If that body isn't attentive and doesn't feel right to a female, then all the reps and sets won't matter. They could not have a cock at all for all I care and for all I notice it--dildos seem to be more reliable anyways. Actually, I've often imagined that pegging a smaller lean fit guy with a curvy body and a nice arse would be so good, and way better than getting railed myself...so just lesbian sex with a man built like a girl lol :D guess that answers a few of my own questions!

My sister has a fiancé who's a gym rat/former bodybuilder with a masc albeit thin build that everyone says is a gorgeous male specimen, and I'm like *Kanye shrug* is he? To me that's not obvious. And I don't often swoon over female athlete bodies or bodybuilders, beyond a few WOSO players. So clearly I'm just not a body gyal, except in terms of basic general fitness (not into a great big fat person, unless they're Orson Welles back from the dead ;)) I'm neither fat nor ripped myself--trying to work out more--but I am Saxon sturdy and average-tall for a woman, so I do at minimum need someone of a similar size to not make me feel like an ungainly giantess or a manatee who's going to squash a partner.

No offense taken at all, R310 (I'm always shaved down there).

[quote] Rarely do I watch p0rn anymore (ethically it sits poorly with me, too much systemic abuse and misogyny on parade)

You know, I'm going to link a video below. I like it when I can find something like this - despite the fact that the three women in this specific video are entirely too young for me -, I like that there's p orn produced by lesbians, for lesbians. See what you think.

[quote] Though it's hard not to compare bodies or feel bad about age or size when watching other women, do you find?

I get what you're saying, but it doesn't really happen to me. Perhaps because I'm such a lesbian I don't 'discriminate', I can feel attracted to women of all ages, sizes and body types, so I guess I end up not judging myself and my own body, either. When my nipples start going hard and I feel the shivers all over my body and feel my pussy getting wet I can't judge anything, or think much about anything, it's that primal thing that's hard to describe.

[quote] I am Saxon sturdy and average-tall for a woman

Do tell, what is average-tall for a Saxon woman? You're Welsh, right? Somehow I get the impression I'd look 'petite' next to you, which is weird (I'm not small).

I don’t shave down there.

I don’t mess with my outward beauty.

R311 hmmmm, the video you linked is interesting. Instructive. And perhaps a hint on your part? Or a fantasy? This isn’t a public space yenno, we probably oughtn’t to flirt so overtly here😏

Seriously, though, many women including me prefer scenes like that, where the setup isn’t too unrealistic or cheesy or sleazy. Just regular young adult women in everyday clothes talking socially, having what we in the U.K. call ‘a normal one’ (night in at home) without having to posture or ‘p0rnify’ a simple sexual interaction. The video was chilled and quiet, and the girls look natural, which I also appreciated. Fake moans and exaggerated faces and clown makeup in p0rn turn me off.

Maybe this is a reach, but I imagine you somewhat to resemble the girl in the striped shirt (the attractive one in the scene imo), the ‘guest’ character—am I close in my guess? She looks a little like singer Hope Sandoval, actually, who in my eyes is one of the most beautiful and talented older women in the world, and is probably the first famous woman I fell for and admired on a deep level.

Fwiw and not to burst any more bubbles, I don’t look a lot like those girls. They’re tight (very young as you say, look like late teens-early 20s?), and the main couple are thin with cute small tits. My body is pale and fleshy by comparison, and I have DDs. I’ve also got a narrower back and a flatter arse than they do! Though thankfully my hips are wide and strong too, so it looks balanced if you don’t examine the proportions too closely—not exactly as hourglass, but could pass as one.

And yes, I’d probably dwarf you. Welsh women aren’t typically tall though they are stocky, and I definitely got the latter trait (as well as the curly hair trait). Like a cob horse. I’m only half Welsh, though, and Saesnag (English/Anglo Saxon) women tend to be on the taller and longer side, especially country/farm girls like me! Germanic, aren’t we. So the genetic mix of both has me stood at 5”6/7 (depending on my posture that day) and 152kg (most of it in the tits & bones).

As for shaving—despite my glib jokes, cunt often does look more appetising bare, no? Ready to eat and clean🙏So I’m sure yours is beautiful. Even so, I must admit that I am someone who’s both physically lazy and averse to the discomfort of itching & I grown hairs, so I trim myself most of the time rather than shave. The covering on the girls in the video is a good healthy amount for me. Also, thinking about the semiotics of bareness (youth, often pubescent) sometimes makes me a little uncomfy, so unless I’m caught up in a scene it can be hard to enjoy. Idk, I’m definitely an overthinker and neurotic when it comes to sex (one more reason I shouldn’t engage too much with porn).

R310 Are you a bi woman?

R313, I wasn't flirting, at all. Just having a conversation. And no, not a fantasy... I've had more than my share of threesomes with women, and, frankly, I don't care if I never have one again. I've actually talked about that at length in the "Polyamorous relationships" thread, even answered a handful of your own questions directed at me, if you recall.

I asked about your height because you'd made yourself sound quite big / tall. Well, you're not that much taller than me - I'm 5'5". Now, I'm sorry - it's not possible that you weigh 152kg. Was that a typo / misconversion? It has to be. If you did weigh that, you'd be morbidly obese, and it doesn't sound like that's the case at all.

I'm not sure why people ask so much about my looks here in this forum, but here it goes again. I look like a two-bit Winona Ryder doppelgänger, down to the big boobs and all. Not remotely like the cute Italian girl in the video, I'm afraid (I wish). Sorry to disappoint.

On a separate note, let's all welcome Zoran, the Croatian pest, back to this thread at R314. How are you today, Zoran? Yes, she's bisexual (or at least she thinks she is). Leave her alone.

If I may just leave this here.

[italic]Wishing you a blessed weekend[/italics]

*emojis* *generic flower meme* *emojis*

^Fucks up the formatting out of caipirinha drunkenness; oh, dear, God bless

I would send her to a vaginal rejuvenation clinic in Switzerland.

I just wanted to say

Straight, mature, gentleman callers are my sole preference. I’m an old fashioned gal, an eloquent, proper lady. None of this LGBT+ stuff for me. Luring and pleasing men with natural desires, using a combination of discretion and titillating energy, is a lady’s job.