I don't understand the concept of Working Mother
How are you going to do both and have enough time & energy left to keep the house functioning with running errands, cooking, cleaning, laundry, self-care, time with hubby, and get 8 hours of sleep per night?
This lifestyle of middle class hetero fraus is my idea of hell. Couldn't do it for ONE DAY. I'd crack.
As bad as that would be, can you imagine being a working SINGLE mother? At least unemployed single mothers on welfare get to stay home so they can focus on their kids, but a working single mother has the worst of all possible worlds: the least amount of support and maximum amount of stress.
Why do so many women sabotage their lives with this foolishness? Were you raised by a working mother? How would you rate her performance?
by Anonymous | reply 87 | February 13, 2023 2:39 PM
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Because we expect women to do all things, President Biden sees the need to level the playing field with UNIVERSAL CHILDCARE.
Like paid sick leave, universal childcare is coming.
by Anonymous | reply 1 | February 9, 2023 9:35 PM
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and I for one couldn't be happier!
by Anonymous | reply 2 | February 9, 2023 9:38 PM
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R1 Childcare is outsourcing the raising of your kids to someone else. If you can't afford to raise your kids, you can't afford kids.
by Anonymous | reply 3 | February 9, 2023 9:40 PM
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Just like is you can't afford to pay corporate tax you can't afford to be in business?
by Anonymous | reply 4 | February 9, 2023 9:50 PM
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Again, just like abortion, rich people never have to suffer.
Sorry, Toots, I am an American and just like the mental health benefits in ObamaCare, I may never use them, but I want my neighbor to have access. Same with Childcare. It improves MY quality of life, even if I never have children. We have seen what rich people ARE doing with education. I am up to my neck in stupid, uneducated adults.
I look forward to my taxes going for Universal Childcare.
by Anonymous | reply 5 | February 9, 2023 9:50 PM
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Because women don't like depending on their husbands for money. It's good to have your own money and independence. If I were a woman, I'd hate to ask my husband (who may be a complete control freak) for an allowance just so I can go grocery shopping. Without your own money to fall back on, what happens if the relationship turns bad and you need to leave? Not having your own funds is a quick way to get trapped in a bad situation.
by Anonymous | reply 6 | February 9, 2023 10:20 PM
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I was raised by a single working mother, OP. She was amazing.
by Anonymous | reply 7 | February 9, 2023 10:23 PM
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My mother was a stay at home one. Dad worked and had control of ALL the finances. When they divorced, mom was stuck with 4 kids, no work skills at all, and barely any child support $400 per month because my dad lied about how much he made to avoid paying her. My mom was FUCKED. We were on food stamps and welfare (thanks asshole Dad). She remarried quickly after working odd jobs here and there to an abusive alcoholic and she eventually went to work for the Post Office. She hated every single moment of working. Yet, the minute I turned 16 I was expected to get a job and pay for my own stuff.
Looking back, both of my parents were idiots but working mothers became a thing when women wised up that men were controlling them via their finances (in the early 1980's). Most women of that generation were brought up believing that men are the breadwinners and a woman's place was in the home (as apparently OP believes, too). Who says it's the woman's job to clean or cook or do the laundry anymore, OP? If men can't do these things, they are pathetic.
Today, mother's who work do it mostly because houses no longer cost $10,000 as my parents' first house did. Although I personally think couples should not have children unless they can afford one parent to stay home until the kid is in school. But alas, poor, stupid idiots are still squeezing out kids while working. The worst are the women who choose at an older age to become single parents because they "always wanted kids." I always wanted a Porsche but never got one because it would have been a horrible decision financially. But hey, who cares that you won't be raising your kid and some stranger will, am I right?
by Anonymous | reply 8 | February 9, 2023 10:54 PM
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Ive known a few single mothers that worked,and every one was a stressed out mess. Childcare was the main issue,since for some reason even grandparents dont want to watch their kids while their daughter works. When I was growing up family was who most people relied on for child care,yet one girl I knew had to PAY her own mother to watch her kids ! I feel for working moms ,even ones with mates. It all falls on them .
by Anonymous | reply 9 | February 9, 2023 11:05 PM
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Am a 30-year old woman still struggling with the decision of family planning/forecasting, and the subreddit!ta r/BreakingMom and r/RegretfulParents are certainly challenging any lingering idealistic thoughts I may have had.
The saddest and worst entries are either about parents who got kids with unexpected developmental disabilities or challenges, or about mothers with do-nothing deadbeat manchild husbands/babydaddies who just videogame instead of cleaning the house or babysitting or bonding with their child. It’s fucking hard to carry and rear and raise kids, in this Hell world or any other, but shit like that must put the difficulty level up so high. I know I’d break down and do something stupid, under that burden.
At last, being a lesbian and having autism has a practical use, as a get-out clause (society doesn’t want someone like me raising kids, anyway).
by Anonymous | reply 10 | February 9, 2023 11:10 PM
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Being a stay at home parent should be an option for either men or women. Young children do need a close relationship with their parent. Honestly that was a big argument to keep remote jobs. Many workers wanted to be home with their kids, save money on gas and funny enough, they still got more work done than in an office.
by Anonymous | reply 11 | February 9, 2023 11:10 PM
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[quote]Being a stay at home parent should be an option
And soon as it becomes a lawful option, let's hear all the rich and evangelical say that their stay at home moms need to be paid.
In advance...FUCK THEM.
by Anonymous | reply 12 | February 9, 2023 11:40 PM
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R3, funny how you Republicans never say to business owners "If you can't pay your employees a living wage, don't own a business"
by Anonymous | reply 13 | February 9, 2023 11:44 PM
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It’s bc most women either can stay home without enough help to run the household and raise the kids all day, or they can go out during work hours and then do this when they get home. The ones that stay home all day have the intensive evening labor of the other ones as well. It’s more a matter of picking your poison
by Anonymous | reply 14 | February 10, 2023 12:05 AM
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"manchild husbands/babydaddies who just videogame instead of cleaning the house"
Some of us can manage to do both.
by Anonymous | reply 15 | February 10, 2023 12:38 AM
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[quote] Today, mother's who work
Oh, dear!
by Anonymous | reply 16 | February 10, 2023 12:45 AM
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OP is complaining that women still have the choice to make bad decisions.
by Anonymous | reply 17 | February 10, 2023 12:48 AM
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There’d be far fewer regretful, poor or neglectful mothers if straight & bi men would use contraception or get snipped.
by Anonymous | reply 18 | February 10, 2023 12:49 AM
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Sometimes a mother’s work is never done, OP.
by Anonymous | reply 19 | February 10, 2023 1:00 AM
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My mom didn't work for the first 12 years of my life. I was born in 1950 and grew up free range. Our mothers were home and we never saw them. They didn't want up in their hair. We, kids, had a contest one summer to see which of our mothers would not kick us out of the house and my mom won. My mom liked kids. When we weren't in school we were outside playing, and outside all summer playing. We rode our bikes everywhere in a 5-mile radius at 6 years old. I grew up in a huge city with the biggest generation in history and I only knew two people who died in high school. They were stoned on LSD and got in a head-on collision in laurel canyon.
by Anonymous | reply 20 | February 10, 2023 1:10 AM
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After 9 years as a stay-at-home mom, my mother went back to work in the 1980s. We didn't need the money because somehow my dad made enough money at his blue-collar job to cover the mortgage and household expenses. But my mother HATED being home all day. She wasn't an ambitious person but she enjoyed the buzz of an office and being part of a team. She worked a few years until she accidentally got knocked up again at age 40. Because those years working were very few, she gets zero social security today.
Today, the cost of childcare for two small kids can eat up an entire paycheck, so some mothers opt to stay home, leaving a huge gap in their resume, and letting their education go to waste.
by Anonymous | reply 21 | February 10, 2023 1:27 AM
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Yeah - never understood the idea that you look for the CHEAPEST possible person to care for your kids. I’ve worked with lots of women who had nannies - because we worked nonstop and on the road 5 days/week. They always looked for someone cheap - usually an immigrant woman. Will never understand the need to have kids. Pure ego.
by Anonymous | reply 22 | February 10, 2023 1:35 AM
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"Hello, fellow Datalounge Male Homosexuals. Please to start thread bashing mothers, da? Go!"
by Anonymous | reply 24 | February 10, 2023 1:52 AM
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r21, and your father is still alive?
by Anonymous | reply 25 | February 10, 2023 2:04 AM
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[quote] Young children do need a close relationship with their parent. [..] Many workers wanted to be home with their kids,
r11 Ideally, I agree. The reality of the stay at home moms is what r21 said below. What happens in case of divorce? Working fathers keep their values - resume, income-level, career-position - and can meet a new partner that other similar-level men can afford.
[quote] leaving a huge gap in their resume, and letting their education go to waste.
The stay at home moms? They have no value in the job market - no career, not young. The places for them are things like Walmart? odd jobs? So some stay married despite being abused. After divorce, the kind of men they can meet and re-marry are often much worse or similar to their exes. But they are now stuck. Of course stable, non-abusive families have always existed. Nothing guarantees that.
by Anonymous | reply 26 | February 10, 2023 2:36 AM
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[quote]As bad as that would be, can you imagine being a working SINGLE mother?
Yes. It's one of the many reasons my own mother will be getting absolutely zero grandchildren from me. She was always so stressed and made motherhood seem like a curse to me. I vowed to never have children because I didn't want to be as tired and miserable as her.
I'll let my brother be tasked with finding some poor girl to marry and bear that burden just so our mom can finally hear the pitter-patter of grandchildren running through the house. I'm not doing that shit to my mind, body, or soul.
by Anonymous | reply 27 | February 10, 2023 3:10 AM
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[quote][R1] Childcare is outsourcing the raising of your kids to someone else. If you can't afford to raise your kids, you can't afford kids.
I'm pretty sure childcare is [bold]more[/bold] expensive than staying at home with your own children. My mother recently told me that the daycare she was paying for my little brother was $200 a week. This was back in 1999-2000. She could've saved roughly $800 a month if she stayed at home with him instead of going to work.
She did get a break in the summer when I was out of school, though. That's when I would babysit him. Every. Damn. Summer. To this day I still have night terrors featuring the theme from 'Caillou.' -_-
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 28 | February 10, 2023 3:16 AM
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r18 are women unable to figure out birth control without a man finding a solution himself?
by Anonymous | reply 29 | February 10, 2023 3:16 AM
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My parents were together and my mother worked. They used a cleaning lady and my father cooked too. But we ate out all the time which was fine with me. My sibling and I were happy to have her out of the house most of the time. We felt sorry for our friends whose mothers who were home all the time.
If this happened today they would have been arrested for negligence lol. But she wasn’t very maternal and we survived childhood somehow.
by Anonymous | reply 30 | February 10, 2023 3:23 AM
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My mother didn't work for most of my childhood. I could never outsource the raising of my children to someone else. Hence, I haven't had any children. Having children is just another thing that the rich have stolen from us.
by Anonymous | reply 31 | February 10, 2023 3:29 AM
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[quote]Childcare was the main issue,since for some reason even grandparents dont want to watch their kids while their daughter works.
"For some reason" = "they've done it once already, know it sucks, and have their own lives to lead now"
by Anonymous | reply 32 | February 10, 2023 3:37 AM
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My mom took off time to have us kids and when my youngest sister entered1st grade, she went back to work. My dad was an evil fucker who constantly bailed out his deadbeat family. Aside for him SPLITTING the monthly bills with my mom, we lived on my mom's work income. My mom paid for every summer vacation we took, including taking my dad's mom. She was a special horror, who called my mom, not so quietly behind my mom's back, the Dirty Dago. May my dad's entire family burn in Hell for eternity.
by Anonymous | reply 33 | February 10, 2023 4:33 AM
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Women going to work was supposed to increase financial independence (which it did) but thanks to our fucking capitalist hellscape the net result is that it is now impossible for anyone but the 1% to raise a family or buy a home on a single income.
by Anonymous | reply 34 | February 10, 2023 4:51 AM
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R29 misses the point. Most women can and do manage contraception, but as we know, birth control is not 100% effective from one party of a coupling. Not to mention, female BC medication & implants have detrimental effects on womens’ health in the long term. Why should the onus be only on women to suffer consequences of using it? And if it’s efficacy is boosted or even doubled by men doing the same, why should they still eschew it? Most men take no responsibility beyond a condom, sometimes. The division of responsibility and labour in this instance (as in many others) is unfairly skewed.
by Anonymous | reply 35 | February 10, 2023 12:41 PM
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Women have a tough time getting approval to get their tubes tied. Men should look into vasectomies. A male birth control pill is being worked on too.
by Anonymous | reply 36 | February 10, 2023 12:47 PM
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R37, I just don't have sex near vaginas. Problem solved.
by Anonymous | reply 37 | February 10, 2023 3:05 PM
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Government-run 'child care' indoctrination camps.
What could go wrong?
by Anonymous | reply 38 | February 10, 2023 3:30 PM
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Amongst a certain set of well to do middle class women it’s fashionable to work to exhaustion. Get ill, crash. Then do it again.
by Anonymous | reply 39 | February 10, 2023 3:33 PM
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Aren't day care centers a moot point for mothers who work from home?
by Anonymous | reply 40 | February 10, 2023 7:29 PM
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I can tell r40 that you are the kind of person who looks for reasons not to help people.
Like a stay at home mom would never need to park children for a Dr/Dental visit? For days they are required to be in the office? For days their cars breakdown?
by Anonymous | reply 41 | February 10, 2023 7:59 PM
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The issue is humans were never really meant to be nuclear families with two parents and a litter of kids. Historically humans lived in multigenerational homes where relatives took part in the childrearing. Grandparents and aunts, uncles and older siblings. Older children stayed home until they got married and helped with providing income. Both men and women took care of the home. When civilization industrialized and men began having to leave home to work in factories and mills. That left women with more household duties and childcare.
Commercialization of everything in the 20th century led to a glamorization of home ownership for young couples. So many people opted to move out young and be self-sufficient and the middle class lifestyle began to form. This put a lot of financial stress on men and emotional stress on women who had to fulfill two roles perfectly. Only solidly middle class families could afford maids and nannies to help out.
When high school became compulsory to keep teens out of the workforce as to not compete older men for jobs. This led to more youth attending colleges and moving out at 18. So older siblings no longer assisted in caring for younger until they married. Eventually women were forced into the workforce as households couldn't be afforded on a single income due to rising costs of living and stagnating wages.
So the only real solution would be return to multigenerational homes which has been on the rise. Many adult children live at home and it's ideal for aging parents who need help with household duties and get joy from grandkids. In many European and Asian countries this never went away.
by Anonymous | reply 42 | February 10, 2023 8:12 PM
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I work ‘til 5 o’clock. Come home and read your tickety tick. ‘Cause I’m a woman! With En Joli!
by Anonymous | reply 43 | February 10, 2023 8:27 PM
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[quote]So the only real solution would be
Would be to make childcare available to EVERYONE who needs/wants it.
Going back to multigenerational single family housing is ridiculous.
by Anonymous | reply 44 | February 10, 2023 8:45 PM
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Im thinking about the Asian model were women are loyal to their family and the man is more of a sperm doaner that throws in to help out the whole mothers family. His role is to keep all the generations afloat but not alone. The brothers and sisters throw in to the house also. As i understand its more of a socilized family structure. The man/ father is not solely responsible for the wife and kids in the same way as the Anglo model. The women have child care help from grandma and help from uncles aunts other adult children. Resources are pooled. The mens role is different. I don't understand all the implications but the mans paycheck is sort of the families money and if he's going to spend some on himself it requires some sneakiness. Does anybody know how this works. Obviously it is a bit abrasive culturally for western style wealth distribution/ responsibility.The Anglo model seems pretty fucked up at this point.
by Anonymous | reply 45 | February 10, 2023 8:46 PM
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As with the Catholic Church, posters here want enforcement of sexual regulations, although they're on opposite sides of the "issue" of sex with contraception.
It. is. not. an. equal. burden, Ladies.
Practically speaking.
Equality in sex does not oblige a woman not to control the social uses of her body. Women are free to reject vaginal intercourse with men who do not meet their criteria, which include pregnancy and STI avoidance.
by Anonymous | reply 46 | February 10, 2023 8:47 PM
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Which is why we need universal childcare.
Now you know why the ERA has not passed.
by Anonymous | reply 47 | February 10, 2023 8:48 PM
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Because humans continue to idiotically reproduce without plan or viable purpose.
by Anonymous | reply 48 | February 10, 2023 8:52 PM
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No r48, because prohibiting abortion and now contraception, are Christian values forcing women to give birth..
by Anonymous | reply 49 | February 10, 2023 9:14 PM
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[quote]the man is more of a sperm doaner
Oh, DEAR!
by Anonymous | reply 50 | February 10, 2023 9:14 PM
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r50, I am positive they meant sperm MOANER.
by Anonymous | reply 51 | February 10, 2023 9:15 PM
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Now, see, that makes more sense.
by Anonymous | reply 52 | February 10, 2023 9:17 PM
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R45 In Japan. Women have complete control over the finances and raising the kids. It's a running joke in Japanese media of husbands begging their wives for an allowance. Japanese mothers have the responsibility of making sure their children are productive, educated and law-abiding members of society. That's why many are so strict towards their children in regards to personal conduct and education and not only academics but also pushing them to pursue competitive sports and the arts like music and painting. The fathers work ridiculously long hours but still expected to help out around the house. Being a housewife in Japan is seen as a highly prestigious position due to their role as raising up hardworking and upright future citizens. So, it's not considered odd for Japanese girls to fantasize about being homemakers. In The West it's different due to Christian influence which positions men as the head of the household including finances and women and children as their individual property. East Asia, it's a bit different, everyone is seen as part of a bigger collective and parents have a duty to society rather than their individual homes.
by Anonymous | reply 53 | February 10, 2023 10:23 PM
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[quote][R1] Childcare is outsourcing the raising of your kids to someone else. If you can't afford to raise your kids, you can't afford kids.
What an utter load of bullshit. You must be trolling or be ignorant. Do some research before posting nonsense.
If that's the case, not being able to have kids because you're not upper middle class or wealthy, then answer this: please explain how so many working class couples in the past managed to have large families, yet never became homeless?
The answer: the salaries back then actually covered a families food, rent and utilities and other basic needs. I sure didn't grow up poor, but my siblings and I never went hungry. Both my parents worked. Today, a weekly salary sure doesn't cover most rents. That's why so many people need to have roommates.
Years ago, a close friend managed to go to college, work part-time and rented an apartment on the East Side in the 20s. The rent was low enough for him to not need a roommate, he's still in the same apartment.
My mom grew up on the LES, she told me, "When I was growing up, rental apartments were super affordable and plentiful. If a family didn't like the apartment, there was always another empty apartment down the block, one you could easily move to. Landlords back then weren't as greedy as they are these days. In the 1940s, one of my aunts and her husband were able to buy a small building on the LES. They were hardly considered rich."
by Anonymous | reply 54 | February 10, 2023 10:36 PM
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[quote] Equality in sex does not oblige a woman not to control the social uses of her body. Women are free to reject vaginal intercourse with men who do not meet their criteria, which include pregnancy and STI avoidance.
Females are called the selective sex for a reason. The minority of females who do not seem to be are often drugged, mentally ill or traumatised (usually by the sexual appetites of men...)
If men could stop raping, coercing, entrapping and indiscriminately cheating, there’s no doubt the sexual health of women would improve immeasurably.
by Anonymous | reply 55 | February 10, 2023 10:44 PM
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R54 along that line my parents bought a small house next door as well as one up the street for my grand mother and an aunt respectively . I remember clearly they paid $6500 for the one next door to us and $5000 for the one up the street. Modest working class neighborhood granted,but they were perfectly nice little houses. Both 2 bd 1 bath. My mother didnt work,so my dad supported a wife and 3 kids,as well as bought 3 houses on a post mans salary. We were far from rich .My mom said he was making $192 every 2 weeks at the post office.Granted that was in the 60s but still.
by Anonymous | reply 56 | February 10, 2023 11:21 PM
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This is why you get them to buy you lots of expensive jewellery silly. It's insurance in the event a younger homewrecker than myself should try to take my meal ticket, oh I mean husband away from me.
by Anonymous | reply 57 | February 10, 2023 11:26 PM
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[quote]If men could stop raping, coercing, entrapping and indiscriminately cheating, there’s no doubt the sexual health of women would improve immeasurably.
Well my boss who is turning 65 this year cheated on her husband TWICE! And not just one time hookups, we are talking about affairs that lasted months. Her husband treated her like a princess, gave her millions in jewelry, expensive luxury cars, she never had to work during their 35 years of marriage and they owned 3 very large houses. Oh but now that he divorced her, "she's the victim".
by Anonymous | reply 58 | February 10, 2023 11:45 PM
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R58 those aren’t comparable situations, and you know that very well.
by Anonymous | reply 59 | February 10, 2023 11:48 PM
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[quote]Am a 30-year old woman still struggling with the decision of family planning/forecasting, and the subreddit!ta r/BreakingMom
I read that subreddit like watching a car wreck. It's a detailed illustration of how stay at home motherhood is nothing but a trap for women. So many of them being abused financially and otherwise, stuck with asshole partners and no way out. The ones who do work have another set of problems, mostly caused by a manbabies who do little to ease her burdens or act like an actual partner.
The world of the heterosexual is a sick and boring life.
by Anonymous | reply 61 | February 11, 2023 12:09 AM
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Plenty of women choose to be a stay at home mom. Not want the responsibility of earning money. Having a child to secure their own position or make there life “ move forward” You could just as easily say it’s a trap for the male breadwinner sacrificing his time energy and life for his family in some job he hates but does for the sake of his family. She may be the asshole partner. His problem caused by woman babies who “ forgot “ her birth control. The victim role is overplayed by so many women. A child is used as a free pass for all sorts of benefits. I know my cousin is one of these people.
by Anonymous | reply 62 | February 11, 2023 1:10 AM
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Working Mother?
did you mean: Conor Coady?
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 63 | February 11, 2023 1:24 PM
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Omg R62, I don’t know a single woman who’s in a financial position to be a stay at home mom. Where do you live?
by Anonymous | reply 64 | February 12, 2023 5:16 AM
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I'm a single working dad of two. I won't lie. It's tough.
by Anonymous | reply 65 | February 12, 2023 6:24 AM
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Yep, having a child is the nail in the coffin for a straight man to get out of the relationship scott free. "But I am the mother of your children! " Even though I forgot to take birth control all those time we had unprotected sex. Straight guys today have caught onto this now. Many wear condoms and the woman complain. Gee, I wonder why?
by Anonymous | reply 66 | February 12, 2023 6:43 AM
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[quote] Many wear condoms and the woman complain. Gee, I wonder why?
Even as a (non-goldstar) lesbian, I know this is complete bullshit.
by Anonymous | reply 67 | February 12, 2023 7:28 AM
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My mom quit her job to raise her two babies. Sometimes she regrets that decision but I tell her that having her with us full time was great and I wouldn’t want to be raised by nannies.
We knew a lady who hired a nanny who almost killed a baby. The woman fed the baby rotten meat and claimed she didn’t know meat had to be in the fridge overnight. That was decades ago and the lady obviously was clueless. The mother never hired anyone again and was the most wonderful mama to her kids.
by Anonymous | reply 68 | February 12, 2023 7:33 AM
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My mother hired a young babysitter who never answered the phone back in the day when everyone only had land lines. She suspected she was leaving the house. Sure enough, she caught her leaving with the baby and going to some food hangout leaving the baby in the car. Shocked at her behavior, as soon as the sitter left she went to the car, took out her child and left without telling the sitter. Sitter called in a panic. Ha, ha.
On another occasion, after that debacle she decided to stick with old woman. That didn't work out either. When they came home she found my baby sister wrapped in the blanket with the head tucked in and the feet sticking out almost suffocating the baby. The sitter had some kind of early dementia. After that they decided it was not worth the risk and took us almost everywhere they went went that was not work related including their night out or dinner.
On the plus side, we learned real fast how to behave in a restaurant as a little kid. Not like the entitled brats that run around now these days while the parents pretend their rug rats have the right to run the place.
by Anonymous | reply 69 | February 12, 2023 8:58 AM
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[quote]Because those years working were very few, she gets zero social security today.
She should get SS based on her husband's income, though.
by Anonymous | reply 70 | February 12, 2023 9:08 AM
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r58, how could she both be your boss AND never had to work because her husband paid for everything?
by Anonymous | reply 71 | February 12, 2023 9:11 AM
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R71 Lol. Good catch. They do trip themselves up don’t they!
by Anonymous | reply 72 | February 12, 2023 9:36 AM
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R67 exactly. Most women have to beg their men to use condoms at all, then have to check that said condoms aren’t stealthed (tampered with, I.e. with holes poked in). I am a gold star, but my straight sister has told me some horror stories about what she & her friends have gone through with straight/bi men.
Men may not loving raising and paying for kids, but they love feeling virile and ‘natural’ more. So all sensible consideration about consequences goes out the window when the tradeoff is no rubber and getting to knock up a female.
by Anonymous | reply 73 | February 12, 2023 9:44 AM
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[quote]how could she both be your boss AND never had to work because her husband paid for everything?
Because she got divorced you silly simpleton and as I said. Now she pays people like me to help her. She still doesn't do anything herself, she pays for maids, counselor, financial advisors, assistants, personal trainers, private hair dresser, chef, etc. All paid for by the money she go from her ex-husband.
by Anonymous | reply 74 | February 12, 2023 11:32 AM
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[quote]Most women have to beg their men to use condoms at all, then have to check that said condoms aren’t stealthed (tampered with, I.e. with holes poked in). I am a gold star, but my straight sister has told me some horror stories about what she & her friends have gone through with straight/bi men. Men may not loving raising and paying for kids, but they love feeling virile and ‘natural’ more. So all sensible consideration about consequences goes out the window when the tradeoff is no rubber and getting to knock up a female.
Cough, Cough, BULLSHIT! It's the other way around Toots. Men do not want children just for the hell of it. Cost a lot of money. The last thing they want is to pay child support for 18 years. Woman are the ones poking holes in condoms, not men.
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 75 | February 12, 2023 11:38 AM
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R74 - okay so this is not 'women' This is a case of a woman in the 1% who cannot be used as a representation of 51% of the population
This fantasy that straight guys are all offering to wear condoms is just that. Straight men want to have their cake and eat it too. They always have. They want a wife and a mistress. They want lots of sex but no kids. Then they want kids and a stay at home wife but they don't want to pay. They don't want to pay but they don't want a woman who earns a lot of money. And on and sure. Sure, there are exceptions. My father is not the worst, he'd a decent man overall and we're very close but he was a nightmare in this area. Wouldn't wear a condom, claimed he didn't want my mom on the pill because he was Catholic, also didn't want lots of kids, also didn't want abstinence. My mother went through some rough years suffering from side effects of various pills and IUDs before she found type of pill that worked and my father mellowed with age and agreed to use condoms now and then.
by Anonymous | reply 76 | February 12, 2023 11:54 AM
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Women have always worked. You think men have always provided everything to women and children while simultaneously conquering the world and building cities and infrastructure? Women just sat on their asses and played with babies until the 1980s came along they decided to put on big-shouldered suits and carry briefcases?
There has always been a thin stratum of pampered wealthy women who handed their children off to caregivers so they could go have lunch with their friends and go to the dressmaker, but the vast majority of women throughout human history have done domestic chores and contributed to their family’s livelihood with work outside the home.
My grandmother raised six kids on a working farm, married to a hopeless drunk. She also took in washing and mending and later worked in a pickle factory. She wound up in a rest home, paid by her children so she could finally get a rest and she was bored to tears. She hated being idle after working her fingers to the bone her whole life.
by Anonymous | reply 77 | February 12, 2023 12:24 PM
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R21, your mom should be getting about 60% of your dad's social security amount as her own benefit plus medicare. As a woman who's had to work to earn her own SS benefits I think that's a damn good deal.
by Anonymous | reply 78 | February 12, 2023 12:50 PM
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[quote]or make there life
Oh, DEAR!
by Anonymous | reply 79 | February 12, 2023 4:34 PM
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r75 The fact that there are women who, indeed, poke holes in condoms, in no way disproves that the vast majority of straight and bi men have to be pushed to wear condoms by women. Men constantly complain about how condoms "ruin the feel" and how much they prefer to go bareback. They expect women to fuck up their bodies and endocrine systems with birth control pills, hormonal IUDs, etc. just so they can "enjoy themselves as nature intended." Fuck out of here.
by Anonymous | reply 80 | February 13, 2023 5:01 AM
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No one is arguing that straight men WANT to wear condoms, they wear them to AVOID ending up having to pay child support. Younger straight men have figured out the baby anchor thing. And just because your dad was a douche does not mean all men are like that. It's far more plausible that a woman would poke holes in a condom than a man. Think about it, women are socialized as kids to play with baby dolls, dream about their wedding day. Little boys are not.
by Anonymous | reply 81 | February 13, 2023 7:43 AM
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R81 incorrectly assuming that most or all women enjoy that heavy formative socialisation to pair off and breed, and want to live up to it.
Logically, if most or all women wanted to reproduce with men that badly, there’d be no need for heavy formative socialisation in the first place. You wouldn’t have to indoctrinate them from youth to want that.
by Anonymous | reply 82 | February 13, 2023 11:40 AM
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R82 makes a great point. There is a social construct. But both men and women tend toward the biological imperative to procreate. IMO, there’s a spectrum and that’s cool.
by Anonymous | reply 83 | February 13, 2023 11:54 AM
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OP, most single mothers didn't PLAN on being single mothers. The relationship ends and what are they going to do, return the kids? They have to make due because they have no fucking choice.
by Anonymous | reply 84 | February 13, 2023 12:07 PM
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[quote]what are they going to do, return the kids?
Sorry, darlin’, even WE say no returns on that. All sales final.
by Anonymous | reply 85 | February 13, 2023 1:50 PM
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The broken english all over this thread is a dead giveaway.
by Anonymous | reply 86 | February 13, 2023 2:10 PM
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The "Hubby" needs to get off his ass and take responsibility.
Where is it written that the wife has to do everything in the relationship. In this day and age, as it has always been, many households need two incomes to survive.
by Anonymous | reply 87 | February 13, 2023 2:39 PM
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