Let’s cast “The Shards” by Bret Easton Ellis

OP you seem oddly fixated on high school students and the young actors playing them in horrible television shows.

He's maybe the worst writer I've ever been unfortunate enough to read.

Who?

Is there something for Colton?

I enjoyed The Shards but have never heard of any of the actors you mentioned, OP.

Any suggestions, R5? Do you “cast” a book as you read it?

The Shartsh?

Hi, Bret!

His self-obsessed meta schtick is superficial and tiresome. I've always found him to be the type of writer who is adored by people who don't read much.

Who cares what twink twats might appear in whatever garbage movie that's made of this piece of shit.

Loving the book. Can’t put it down.

Hi, Bret! Back again to shill your latest waste of trees, eh?

Who on earth but you would even know so many character names, let alone bother to type them?

You're pathetic. Have a coke snort. 'Sharts' will be in the bargain bins soon enough.

The Shards is brilliant. By far Ellis' best. His magnum opus.

R12, hi again, Bret!

This thread will end in tears. OP For you, mostly.

In his mind, he's still a college student in the early 80s.

It's well-known that "BEE" (a particularly stupid acronym) posts on DL on occasion, typing praise to himself in the third person whenever he cranks out another tome.

R13 I fucking wish.

A while back, I created thos thread showing pics of all the real life Shards characters from the 1981 Buckley Yearbook. On his podcast Bret suggested I got most of them right.

R16 I can believe Bret posts here. Unlikely but maybe. But there's no way he praises his own work if he does. Completely and utterly out of character.

R17 Oh, so just a fan boy, then...that he references on his 'podcast'...

R16 what the fuck makes BEE a stupid acronym? Those are his initials.

You have to go in a time machine and get Ryan Phillipe from 1998 to play Robert Mallory.

R19 he didn't reference me. He just said Reddit got it "mostly right."

Bret, so sad; now talking about himself to himself.

R23 ok, psycho.

Why are you choosing such obscure young actors for the main parts? Why not go with more prominent ones. There are multiple roles for very good looking young men in a potential film Thom, Robert & Ryan should be exceptionally attractive and have athletic bodies and be charismatic. Bret and the first guy killed are second tiered, but still Hollywood attractive. Jordan Elsass could have played one of the first three, but it looks like he self destructed his Hollywood career. Luke Mullins could play Ryan. Nico Greetham is getting long in the tooth, but could possibly be Robert.

R25 I just think it's very hard these days to cast young characters from 1981. Those characters have something that young people today just lack. Like, you can do Our Gang now because little children are just so different now.

[quote] ok, psycho.

That would be OP/BEE, whose latest murder-fest, 'Sharts,' is recycled violence as "art."

Case Walker from The Other Two, had a dramatic flourish at the end of season 2 that was impressive enough to think he might really be able to act. He could possibly play Robert.

R27 your insistence that OP and I are Bret is not only a sign of mental illness, but of stupidity. You can easily use the block feature to see both our histories.

Also, it weird that you get so angry simply because people enjoy something. Have you read The Shards? I doubt it. Why don't you provide a list of authors/titles it's ok to discuss without causing you to spew your idiotic and gross ramblings and unfounded accusations? I'm going to hazard a guess it'a because you don't read too much.

Go away. Let people enjoy things. Or, go read the book and come back with valid criticisms and/or interesting insights on it.

Has Ryan Murphy bought the rights yet?

If all these high schoolers are in this project, I'm not interested in directing it

R30 Bret has hinted on his podcast that some kind of limited series is currently in the offing. Didn't say who or where.

I would watch it!

[quote] Why are you choosing such obscure young actors for the main parts? Why not go with more prominent ones.

Let's give OP his due: if there is ever going to be a film adaptation of this work, it's not going to be with A-listers.

Even when Ellis was at his most famous he only got second- and third-raters for his films: RDJ was obscure when he did "less than Zero," and the movie was really headlined by Andrew McCarthy and Jami Geertz. And Faye Dunaway only really had a cameo in the one set at a college which shows James van der Beek taking a shit (what was that one called? it's flushed itself right out of my mind, pun intended).

Loved Less Than Zero, American Psycho, and Rules of Attraction. I'll give this one a read and get back to you, OP.

R35 Again, by far his best. It's almost like the TRUE story of Less Than Zero. More Than Zero, it should be called.

R29, you sure are butthurt! Sad queen.

[quote] Also, it (sic) weird that you get so angry simply because people enjoy something.

And you get so weird and angry when anyone dares to mock your vaunted author, what with your tongue so far up his ass you can taste what he had for lunch.

[quote] spew your idiotic and gross ramblings and unfounded accusations

Unhinged much, Mary?

[quote] I'm going to hazard a guess it'a (sic) because you don't read too much.

I read many books, asshole, just not tiresome retreads with serial killers. This is no doubt your favorite genre, since you're displaying deranged violent tendencies.

Ellis is a hack, whose 'metier' is about sick people grotesquely murdering people. Your obsessive defense of this hack is pathetic.

They must play this during the opening credits of the movie.

Really the only song for the beginning is the one that’s used as a leitmotif during the whole book. Luckily, the music rights for 40 year old music shouldn’t be too outrageous, but they’re need a hefty budget nonetheless. They’ll also need lots of MTV and music video clips as well if that’s different licensing. Hell, MTV should just do the limited series as a panacea to its early days.

Yes, lots of retro music will fill the gaping plot holes between grisly murders and stabbings; perfect masturbation material for the sick perverted Ellis fans.

"When you talk to me, it's like you're talking to yourself."

I would be perfect for the head cheerleader part (if there is one.)

R42 You obviously know nothing about private schools.

It's such a shame they never managed to make a film of Glamorama. That could have been very interesting.

Lea DeLaria as Bret Easton Ellis.

Who wants to revisit this time period at all?

AIDS was breathing down young people's necks, so let's add a ham-handed metaphor about a serial killer stalking young people. Genius!

A generation was wiped out and another generation of us are exhausted of living and re-living the trauma.

BEE looked ancient in high school, per the photos at R17.

Cool.

Tool.

Stool.

R46 the story has ZERO, and I mean ZERO to do with AIDS.

It's Bret Easton Ellis' origin story. Or, at least the origin story of his literary persona.

The book is FANTASTIC. I suspect even bay sayers won't be able to put it down.

Oh dear. Nay sayers

Naysayers is one word. It's no surprise that functional illiterates are fawning over his latest slashfest.

Is Bret still with Todd?

R54 yes

I've been trying.

I have the same issue as with his other books I've tried: he needs a better editor.

For the first few dozen pages the fact that he scrupulously catalogs what song was playing during a scene and what brand of clothes a character is wearing is sort of interesting and helps to set the scene.

But after that it's more like "FFS, we know they are listening to early 80s New Wave music all the time. And that A wears a lot of pastel preppy gear..." -- I get that is is supposed to be a comment on how the characters would be very aware of what everyone else is wearing and listening to, but it just slows the book down so much that I find myself reverting to seventh grade and skipping ahead to find "the good parts" (the sex scenes)

And even there... sparse on detail and no explanation of how 17 year old Bret knew that he and his fuck buddy should be doing enemas to clean themselves out before fucking.

Though to his credit, the description of that first time with someone you knew but who you didn't realize was also into guys was very well done.

[quote] he scrupulously catalogs what song was playing during a scene and what brand of clothes a character is wearing

Same shtick since 'American Psycho'

[quote] knew that he and his fuck buddy should be doing enemas to clean themselves out

The publishing business needs an Ellis douche to flush out his shitty books.

Okay, finished the book.

Since this is DL, I will stick to the gay parts.

I thought he did a very good job of exploring the conflicts and feelings of the sort of gay guy who is male-socialized, e.g, whose friends are mostly straight guys, and the realization that no natter how much he is crushing on them and attracted to them that nothing is going to happen, and the attempt many such guys make to have a girlfriend and hetero sex in high school and college along with the denial that they are, in fact, gay.

As for the rest of the book, it could have been much shorter and I did not buy the ending, especially the scene with the aunt.

I'm not remembering anything involving an aunt. Maybe it's something he added for the book that wasn't in the podcast version. Was it Robert's aunt?

Having grown up in the era depicted, and having gone through versions of what Bret goes through in the story, I really loved it.

And his last meeting with Susan 'Is my secret safe with YOU?" gives me chills to remember it.

For real R59? It is one of the most crucial scenes in the book

[SPOILER ALERT]

Robert's aunt leaves a message for Bret after Bret confronts Robert about being in a mental institution. She tells Bret that Robert is a good kid... and then proceeds to tell him that Robert had dated the first girl that The Trawler killed and that his father suspected he had molested his 12 year old stepsister and that he took all manner of drugs including LSD which is part of why he ended up in the mental institution.

This is what convinces Bret that Robert really is the Trawler.

Also, if we're going to get into the gay sex part, I was surprised that Matt bottomed for Bret since Bret made it sound like it as a very casual thing and I had initially thought that meant Matt let Bret blow him or maybe they traded hand jobs.

Bret also seems to take Ryan's virginity--it's the first time Ryan has sex with a guy, but Bret mostly seems interested in telling us that he topped as much as he bottomed for Ryan.

In neither case does he comment on cock size even though he's getting fucked.

He also knows about using an enema even though it seems his sexual experience is very limited and there was no internet to google "how to bottom" in 1981

R60 Wow it sounds like the book is different from the version he read in the podcast.

SPOILER ALERT-

My question to you- who did you come away thinking The Trawler is?

Can they find a role for Ann-Margret?

Dunno R63

I feel like it was purposely left ambiguous.

Bret is such an unreliable narrator (Bret the character in the book) that I think you are meant to walk away uncertain: was it Bret, was it Robert, was it some random group who worshiped Robert or was it all something Bret made up?

I only read The Informers by him and I feel that's sufficient. I found it amusing and enjoyed the schadenfreude because every character in that were assholes. I tried American Psycho but was bored to death that I don't think I finished the first chapter. So many lines about Gucci, Prada, etc etc. I did enjoy the film of Less Than Zero though I'm aware it's different from the book. I'll try to read that eventually but I'm in no rush..

[quote] every character in that were assholes.

Just like the author!

R67 The issue I had with The Informers was despite all the depraved sex acts, international crimes, backstabbing done and vampires. I didn't give a shit about anything that happened because the characters were so vapid and uninteresting with no personalities or motives. I get that was the point they are isolated and broken people with too much money and time on their hands. But nothing was compelling about it. The satire was there but that doesn't mean it's a good narrative. I think Gregg Araki captured the isolated LA rich and gay vibe better.

I may be able to make some time in my busy acting schedule for a part

I finished the book last weekend and I miss it. I really loved it. The only actor who popped into my head as I read it was Nico Grenthem for Robert. He could probably still pass for a high school student. Oh, and Denis O’Hare as the gay producer’s creepy assistant.

R70 Glad you loved it. I listened to it a couple years ago when he read it on his podcast. My favorite book of all time, I think.

Bret Easton Ellis: Over-rated

Who did he blow to get published? Who was the Harvey Weinstein of the publishing world?

[quote] My favorite book of all time, I think.

R71's bookshelf:

Not just a Writer

Emote Emote

His Life Philosophy

HI, BEE. Up on another 3rd-person web and coke binge again?

Bret Easton Ellis is a gifted writer.

Sounds exhausting. How many designer labels will he weave into his story. No thanks.

No thanks. I read one of his POS books. That was enough.

He's great.

He good. He really good.

Why would he name his novel after a gross underwear accident?

RIP, BEE.

Bret Easton Ellis is a grifting whiter.

Ellis knows how to write serious literature.

Soon to be an HBO series

...because shit floats.

SO excited for the series. The book is amazing. No, I'm not Bret- I've been posting about his book since it was on his podcast 3 years ago.

Maybe cast an actor from Stranger Things?

I hope they don’t pussy out on the hot gay sex parts.

R92 I think the single most erotic thing I ever read was Robert Mallory starting to make out with Bret in his house. And Bret feeling down, realizing that Mallory is soft... and he says, with pure disgust in his voice "I knew it. Fucking faggot." And walks away. Dayum.

Yeah, that was good part, r93. And all the descriptions of what Bret did with Matt and Ryan.

R94 The Matt shit was HOT. Just a nasty, dirty blonde surfer str8 brah. Smelled of sandalwood and cedar.

And then, their final argument left me emotionally drained.

R94 Did you hear The Shards on the podcast, or did you read it. Let me tell you, those final pages, after listening for an entire YEAR, had me sobbing.

I read it, but I’m thinking about going back and listening to it.

This thread made me pick up "The Shards"....was fine with the name-checking of songs and movies but got very bored by the "scary" murder plot.

Very overwritten dialogue scenes...how many times do we need to be told that someone said something "softly" or "gently" to a freaking out or trying-not-to-freak-out Bret?

Only thing that really interested me was the Terry Schaefer scenes, particularly the scenes with Terry's nasty loser hetero assistant. BEE gets something going there. Who was the Hollywood exec Terry is based on? I wonder how far the real Bret went with him.

What I liked about these Terry scenes is that BEE would like to act all tough and jaded about the situation, but he can only manage that fleetingly. Instead, it feels at moments like he has an urge to go full Me Too with it, but that just wouldn't suit his image. So there's creative tension in these scenes.

Ok, i bought the book from one of the what ate u reading this summer threads. Good but really tired of high school cliques , too much. BUT....Freaky book, couldnt put it down and couldnt decide if i should sage the thing or just get it out of my house..worth the money just for the freak out ending.

R97 Terry is based on John Foreman, a prominent Hollywood producer who partnered with Paul Newman on many projects including Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. John was the father of Julie who was BEE’s high school girlfriend. It was an open secret that John was Gay/bisexual. He died of AIDS in 1992, thought it was coveted up quite well. His other daughter is Amanda, an actress best know for playing Felicity’s roommate on the series.

Interesting, R99. Foreman definitely doesn't look like Lindsey Buckingham, which is the visual comparison Bret makes for Terry in "The Shards." The Terry scenes have real tension to them, unlike the endless scenes with all the interchangeable hot young guys with great asses. Couldn't one of these young guys be hot but have an unexceptionable butt, lol.

I hope the tv version shows the parts where BEE fingers and tongues the asses of Matt Kellner and Ryan Vaughn.

I'd rather cast The Sluts by Dennis Cooper

The Sluts could never be made into a movie.

I created this handy dandy guide to the real life names/faces in The Shards a couple years ago.

Obsessed much?

It was really cool when Bret was reading a chapter every two weeks on his podcast. He was about half way through when I created that post. Yes, I was obsessed for a bit, for sure.

Can Kit Connor do a passable American accent to play one of the hot guys Bret fucks? Is there one that gets fingered extensively? Him. Connor looks like he’s in need of some hot fingering.

The scene were Robert comes on to Bret, gets him all worked up, and goes "I knew it. Fucking faggot." and walks away was so painfully hot.

Well, Ryan Murphy just snapped up Nicholas Chavez to play a Menendez brother, so that takes him out of the running.