I’m a lazy whore and need motivation to do chores and tedious paperwork this weekend

You are a lazy whore who needs to get off your ass and do chores and tedious paperwork.

Did that help?

Not yet.

First, jerk off. That will help to break the cycle of dopamine hits that you get from engaging in social media.

Second, exercise.

Third, smoke meth.

Adderall.

Or, start with a list, then do one or two things to cross off it. Take a break with a timer, repeat this process until the list is done. You’d be surprised at how little time some of the tedious chores take. And instead of half-heartedly being lazy and procrastinating - but still distracted by all the crap you’re avoiding, you get stuff done so you can be truly lazy with a clean slate/brain.

i actually do not like having things done because then there is nothing to do!

stupid, i know.

Do the first step only. If you need to vacuum pull out the vacuum cleaner, maybe even plug it in. Then go back to bed/sofa/computer with a vodka tonic. Just one though.

I put on my favorite songs and try to finish one chore to each song. R4 is right in saying some chores don't take as long as you think. Its hard to get motivated sometimes though, so I know what you mean.

If you get all your chores done, I promise to post a very sensual picture of myself to Instagram just for you.

R7, tell me some of your songs. Help me!

weed

R9. 'A Spoonful of Sugar' of course.

The honey bees that fetch the nectar

From the flowers to the comb

Never tire of ever buzzing to and fro

Because they take a little nip

From every flower that they sip

And hence (And hence)

They find (They find)

Their task is not a grind

(Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h ah!)

I'm the same exact way OP. So here's just some of the songs for my housekeeping chore list. Dance! . . . Dance! Dance! Dance! . . . Nelly Furtado Say it Right Mass Digital Remix, Swedish House Mafia Don't You Worry Child, David Guetta Titanium, Amber Sexual, If You Could Read My Mind Stars on 54, U Got thee Look 745 remix, Can't Fight the Moonlight Leann Rimes, Icona Pop I Love It, Brittany Spears Giniwine Toxic X Pony, Usher Without You, Pussycat Dolls I Hate This Part and my favorite is the DL Boogaloo. My laptops reads the threads out loud with a fast but not too fast house disco beat in the background.

Shop for boots, OP. Our wide but bland selection of shitty shoes will drive you into action.

You don't even need to get off your ass to do paperwork.

What kind of whore sits on her ass? Shouldn’t it be in the air? You ARE lazy.