Monogamy and Gay Male Couples

Yes, but I’m one of those freaks who only really likes relationship sex. I don’t think that’s all too common.

Everything exists. If you're asking if it's common, then no.

It always has for me but that was my personal decision. Monogamy works for me but I realize open relationships are probably more common.

More honored in the breach than the observance.

The limited amount of responses speaks volumes....

Not a lot of gay couples past the age of 40.

R5 Because it's a stupid topic that's been asked here 1000 times

I get reported by some prissy bitches every time I address this topic, but what the hell.

Men without women have no need to be monogamous. Stop imitating the goddamn breeders and lets create something new.

Yeah, you can stick with one guy and be faithful to him. But males by nature are meant to spread their seed.

If you're not stupid enough to adopt some het's brats, then two independent men can fuck whomever they want.

The whole concept of "gay marriage" is idiotic.

[quote] Not a lot of gay couples past the age of 40.

Lame. The opposite is true. Guys under 40 are too busy fucking around. Guys over 40 are ready to settle down.

Why do I see so many illogical comments here which get "likes"?

I prefer a Boston marriage myself and maybe some cats…

[quote] Yeah, you can stick with one guy and be faithful to him. But males by nature are meant to spread their seed.

But gay men don’t. We’re already outliers. Monogamy has been the norm for centuries and for good reason - disease. People knew that’s how disease spread.

[quote] Because it's a stupid topic

Then leave, you dope.

Yes it exists. It’s fairly common in my circle of gay friends. We’re younger though. I think older gays struggle with the idea.

Most people don't eat the same food day in/out. Why would they want to fuck the same person day in/out?

I've always like variety; a bit of this, a nibble of that, a dollop of those. Same with people. Of course, you get to a point in life where you've hit the sexual wall, sex becomes another finite and you're well and truly fucked out in that frankly, my dear, I'd rather read a book kinda way. But it was one motherfucking slice while it lasted!

What R9 said. Preach, Sis!

We can bend the rules a little. Husband and I have been together for decades with a great, intertwined life. Every once in a while we play together with a third (or another couple). It’s a fun experience we get to share together.

[quote]But males by nature are meant to spread their seed.

Which is why more evolved men are more likely to be monogamous.

" ... more intelligent individuals may be more likely to acquire and espouse evolutionarily novel values and preferences (such as liberalism and atheism and, for men, sexual exclusivity) than less intelligent individuals ... the average intelligence of a population appears to be the strongest predictor of its level of liberalism, atheism and monogamy."

[quote] But gay men don’t. We’re already outliers. Monogamy has been the norm for centuries and for good reason - disease. People knew that’s how disease spread.

r11 Obviously we gay males don't make butt babies. But the male is designed by evolution for promiscuity to spread his seed. Survival of the fittest and all that good stuff.

No, without women and children in the picture monogamy has never been the norm. How many straight males marry as teenagers and only fuck one female their entire life? Yet you expect us gay males to do that?

R1, you poor deluded fool. You are so having your ass cheated on.

[quote] the average intelligence of a population appears to be the strongest predictor of its level of liberalism, atheism and monogamy.

r17 I hope you realize the established order writes such blather as a form of de rigueur indoctrination.

Since when is liberalism and atheism associated with monogamy? 🤣 Christians and conservatives are the ones who preach monogamy and sexual exclusivity.

JFC the average gay male these days is worse than my grandmother in terms of traditional values.

Yes, it exists. 28 years here.

And yes, we still fuck.

[quote] Yes, it exists. 28 years here. And yes, we still fuck.

r21 Sorry, Elder Fey, but that's lame.

Fucking is lame?

R18 there is no spreading of the seed for gay men as there is no passing on your genes to other men. So that theory does not apply in any way to gay men.

Is the same bigot posting all these threads on gay male relationships? I’m guessing it’s some Trumptard interloper thinking he’s being clever. Lol & SMFH. UCSF study from the 1980s says that there’s not much difference in males (het vs. geigh ones) with regards to monogamy. The same study also said (way back then!) that anal secks was almost as common among hets as it was among “teh gays.” So drop the superior attitude, het skanks, you’re no better!

Why would hets engage in anal sex?

A bitch doesn't have a dick or a prostate.

Just because gay men are attracted to men, who they obviously can't reproduce with, doesn't mean that they aren't subject to the evolutionary drive to mate with multiple partners. Of course, just because humans are subject to the same evolutionary drives as lower species, it doesn't mean we can't transcend them. Most men don't submit to the evolutionary imperative to kill the offspring of other males. Of course, some do.

Wow you're a true believer, R27.

Humans have individual interests and some people whether gay men or not, find the concept of dating tiresome. Maybe it’s introversion, some feel relief not being on the market. Even if they are attractive.

Maybe some people actually fall in love?

R24 It doesn't matter weather your gay or not. The need to spread your seed is in your lizard brain. The most ancient part of your brain like hunger and breathing. it is instinctual and life evolved for that purpose. The only purpose of life is to reproduce and eventually die.

^^^ The fact that you men or all men get horny is nature's way of making sure you reproduce. Doesn't matter if you choose not to. There was a time when we didn't even understand the relationship between babies and sex.

the majority of straight couples aren’t 100% monogamous throughout their entire relationship they just lie and say they are

Nope. Been with my partner for 20+ years and I go on Grindr when he’s out of town

Most men with an alive sex drive are tempted to cheat, and often fall prey to it. It makes the practice of monogamy difficult, despite believing in it.

There is nothing more hilarious than people with dead clits and dicks who suddenly become saints & conservatives because their sex drive is gone.

[quote] Maybe some people actually fall in love?

r30 However, the difference between the male libido and the female libido is that men can have sex without love at all. Sex plus love equals romance. But the quick anonymous fuck has its own special appeal to a man.

[...]

It's all I'd be interested in. But no one has been interested in doing it with me. I don't want a roommate-with-benefits.

Well, of a certain... vintage... perhaps I have a off-brand take on it all: you may as well connect sexually with those outside your relationship, but be discreet. Have a little sensitivity, nuance, and wit. You know, the French way.

[quote] But a male doesn't HAVE to give in to that. I know that monogamy is largely a heterosexual foundation because females needed straight and bi men to commit to them for security related reasons that are part of a females psyche. But just because males are biologically motivated away from monogamy, I also think society pushed it too far about males having to fuck around and therefore making all men out to be cheaters who can't control themselves.

r38 I think heterosexuals need monogamy, not only for the female psyche because she wants stability and "love" and a man who will protect her. But she also needs a stable home for her children. This is logical and evolutionary.

Maybe we gay males are just not suited to monogamy. I mean it's a male on male relationship. We are literally more masculine than straight guys because we don't have to pander to women.

You said guys always cheat on other guys. Why don't we just eliminate this heteronormative expectation? Fuck monogamy. Yeah, we're jealous creatures and we are possessive of our lovers. But is this correct? Why not dump the monogamous expectation altogether?

And it's not cheating if you both agree to it.

[quote]r8 Men without women have no need to be monogamous. Stop imitating the goddamn breeders and lets create something new.

Like herpes!

r42 Uh, I'm pretty sure a straight guy got that from a woman. I've never knew anybody who had it at least.

Both Halakha and Shari'a recognized the futility and imposibility of male monogamy and therefore established laws for polygamy. Xtians were far more into control, wanted to be seen as "evolved" from Jews/Muslims, so promoted monogamy.

r44 Wonderful that we have gay marriage now so we can all be good Christians!

Different strokes.

Diana Ross was AMAZING in Monogamy.

R48. She was ok in it.

Yes, they are called sexless marriages.

It's rare. No one talks about it, but no matter how much we try to streamline male gay relationships culturally, there's naturally an inbuilt element of aversion therapy. We are programmed to find faeces averse, and there's only so long you can keep up the sexual attraction after inevitable recurrent accidents and very intimate confrontations with it. That's primarily the reason for it.

The honeymoon period is extremely short in gay male relationships unless you both are so naturally exceptionally physically attrative that it can conquer it for a while longer.

Read up on limerance, R50. What evidence do you have about less limerant male couples?

If not for Grindr, I’d never get laid.

So, it was that I’d be forced to be asexual because my husband turned out to be.

[quote] We are programmed to find faeces averse, and there's only so long you can keep up the sexual attraction after inevitable recurrent accidents and very intimate confrontations with it.

R50, you’re either a homophobic troll, incredibly stupid, or just plain dirty. I’ve been with my partner for 15 years, we have anal sex 3x/week (average) and neither of us have never had a single accident.

R50 is ignorant of the rather pungent and slimy liquids that emit during hetero sex.

[quote]But the quick anonymous fuck has its own special appeal to a man.

Not to me, not from the first instant I realized I was gay. I always wanted to build a monogamous life with a man, and had zero interest in NSA sex, no matter how many opportunities were thrown in front of me.

These threads are always filled with “men must spread their seed” tropes, which is fine. In my experience, however, the more apparent male traits are jealousy, possessiveness, and competitiveness. Without recognizing that, good luck navigating any kind of relationship with men.

[quote] It's rare. No one talks about it, but no matter how much we try to streamline male gay relationships culturally, there's naturally an inbuilt element of aversion therapy. We are programmed to find faeces averse, and there's only so long you can keep up the sexual attraction after inevitable recurrent accidents and very intimate confrontations with it. That's primarily the reason for it.

r50 WTF? Associating faeces with fucking is like associating kissing with spit. So you see homosexuality as "shit sex"?

Dude, your aversion to homosexuality is much deeper, driven by self-hate, and is perhaps even sociopathic.

Monogamy is monotonous

[...]

[...]

[...]

My first love cheated on me. Just the pits. We made up & then i fucked around on him. He had no problem with it. Opened my eyes to having our cake & eat it. Lasted awhile longer. Still friends.

Only ugly gays get married