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I have not aged well

Am I the only one here on DL who doesn’t look 10-20 years younger?

I was a gawky bullied teen and had my first kiss at 21. I grew into my looks around that time and made the most of it in my 20s. I thought I had more time though, not expecting to begin looking like the discount section of a spirit halloween in my mid thirties.

For what it’s worth, I’m in very good shape, a lifelong athlete, white, have all my hair. Just look tired, sallow and like shit. Finding it hard to cope with my new invisibility.

I know all this shit is so shallow and some people get mauled by pitbulls, cancer or blown up in wars but i’m still finding it hard to get a grip about my rapidly decaying physical form.

by Anonymousreply 255December 7, 2022 9:00 PM

Stop drinking. Helped me.

by Anonymousreply 1October 8, 2022 5:14 AM

Thanks R1, I actually think that is sound advice in general.

by Anonymousreply 2October 8, 2022 5:19 AM

C vitamin for the skin

by Anonymousreply 3October 8, 2022 5:19 AM

I feel the same, R1, it's hard to lay down that sword when you were attractive in your youth. I struggle everyday with looking older and having saggier skin. I take heart in knowing so many people feel the same. Even GOOP has mentioned how she's got wrinkles but they're beautiful, etc. I don't usually take advice from her but it's nice to know even the "beautiful" people are getting old. Or you could go the Gwen Stefani and Vadge route and get ridiculous work done. Age is the great equalizer but being in shape is huge. Look at poor Bridget Fonda, not to wrinkled but she would be if she lost weight. It's times like this that I am so happy I was always slim. I can't imagine having to loose any weight now, while my skin is not so elastic. It's just a process, I guess. Mourn your youth but remember, the alternative is death. Growing old is not for sissies. Moisturize and drink lots of water. And yes, R1, I havent had a drink in almost 9 years now and am so happy. I'm sure booze would have further wrecked me.

by Anonymousreply 4October 8, 2022 5:22 AM

I'm with you Op, I feel great and I'm in good shape, but I look every day of my age. It's just the way it is

by Anonymousreply 5October 8, 2022 5:23 AM

What’s the Ugliest Part of Your Body? I think it’s your mind

by Anonymousreply 6October 8, 2022 5:23 AM

How old is you?

by Anonymousreply 7October 8, 2022 5:24 AM

This might sound stupid, but avoiding the sun and wearing sunscreen will truly keep you looking younger. It sounds like the issues you have with your looks aren’t body or hair-loss related, so I’m assuming you’re referring to your face. People underestimate how much the sun ages and damages the skin, especially if you’ve spent a lot of time in it. Despite having dark hair, I’m extremely fair-skinned (ancestry is half Russian Jewish, half Swedish—I don’t tan, I BURN). My family has a history of skin cancer so I’ve always been super cautious and have avoided it, and my face looks a lot younger than most people I know who are in the same age range as me (I’m 32).

by Anonymousreply 8October 8, 2022 5:25 AM

Good advice, R1 and R3.

I'd also add quit smoking, if you smoke. Cut out all sugar. Get 8 hours of sleep each night. Wear sunscreen every time you go out

Not doing these things will accelerate your aging like crazy as you get older--especially if you don't have the greatest genes.

by Anonymousreply 9October 8, 2022 5:28 AM

R8 Yup. My sister is a pale ginger who's been obsessive about avoiding the sun since she was a child, and she has amazing skin.

by Anonymousreply 10October 8, 2022 5:28 AM

Another vote for quitting the booze. I feel sooooooo much better than when I used to drink. Life is just much better on every level. And my skin got better, too. Alcohol is a toxin. Just because it's ubiquitous and we have normalized getting fucked up on Friday night or drinking wine or booze all evening every night "to relax," doesn't mean that our bodies and brains got the memo. It takes a huge toll. It's super dehydrating and fucks with every system in your body. After our 20s do we really need to drink so fucking much?

by Anonymousreply 11October 8, 2022 5:29 AM

The scariest thing about getting older, you're outside with a group of people, you glance over at a store window and you wonder, "Who's that old guy in our group?" When suddenly you realize it's YOU and you didn't even recognize yourself ☹️

by Anonymousreply 12October 8, 2022 5:31 AM

I’m fat, so who cares how old I am?

by Anonymousreply 13October 8, 2022 5:33 AM

You said you're in very good shape.

by Anonymousreply 14October 8, 2022 5:34 AM

Im 61 and look it . I quit caring about all that years ago. I do however,keep myself well groomed and try to dress ok,but not with the dedication I had 20 years ago. Dont take it all so personally Op ,nobody wants to fuck old people. Not even other old people. All these bitches on here talking about "Im 60 and have hot hung college students dying to fuck me " are LIARS. Nobody wants to fuck an old person.

by Anonymousreply 15October 8, 2022 5:35 AM

All great replies, I appreciate all of you. R7, I am 34. R8, correct, yes i feel it is my skin that is the weak link. I try to stay out of the sun now, but I have been outdoors a lot over the years and my heritage is almost 100% Scottish so I was fucked from the start.

I know whatever steps I take now to abate the acceleration of the process are good and will make me feel better, but I guess overall what I need is some kind of peace and acceptance about it because the reality is things are not going to get better, just maybe worse slower since I already am in good shape etc.

by Anonymousreply 16October 8, 2022 5:37 AM

R15 stop! You're making me laugh. I imagine you are right, we become invisible as we age. Now is the time to look at our rich, interior life. That's why I stay off facebook and only post here. On fb, if you're cute, people agree with you just to have a shot at you. I like being here where I am judged by my bitchery and grammar and my looks are a moot point. I don't want to fuck a young person anyhow. I'll gladly stand aside and let the new young have at it. OT, my friend is at a Pet Shop Boys concert right now, he knows I love this song and sent a vid of them doing it. This song perfectly encapsulates our youth and the loss of it.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 17October 8, 2022 5:41 AM

@r15, I'm a bit older than you, your observation is spot on 👍

The good news is that you no longer really care that guys aren't lined up to fuck you. You're relaxed and you find new things that interest you. Not worrying about getting laid is so comforting

by Anonymousreply 18October 8, 2022 5:44 AM

[quote]All these bitches on here talking about "Im 60 and have hot hung college students dying to fuck me " are LIARS. Nobody wants to fuck an old person.

I'm 50 and I think I look 50, but I only get attention from 25-28 year olds. 🤷🏻

I get called daddy a lot. And I get asked to do weird things like "call me Tiger" and I'm like "Ok, Tiger". (Tiger is pretty fucking cute actually, but I want a 50 year old boyfriend who wants me to call him by his real name. It's just not happening for me).

by Anonymousreply 19October 8, 2022 5:45 AM

Congratulations on achieving whiteness. I'm sure you worked hard on that.

by Anonymousreply 20October 8, 2022 5:47 AM

Old guys with guys half their age look ridiculous. Something I could never be comfortable with

by Anonymousreply 21October 8, 2022 5:48 AM

I just wish this body would settle on a weight. While I’ve stuck to my low end for six years, this body jumps around between obese, beefy, muscular, and toned according to some weird schedule of its own making.

If I don’t drop dead, will I age into an elf on the shelf? A garden gnome? A dwarf? A goblin?

by Anonymousreply 22October 8, 2022 5:49 AM

There are things you can do, but they involve pain and require money. A facelift is very iffy for men; you risk looking worse, and then pitied and ridiculed for your vanity. I suggest a heavy duty laser peel, an upper and lower eyelift if your eyes are hooded or if you have undereye bags, and light botox.

Good cosmetic dentistry is a huge plus; even whitening your teeth will go a long way. But if you get veneers, you want them to look natural and healthy, not blinding white.

Also, my own opinion, shave off any grey or white facial hair. It makes any man look like a hobo.

by Anonymousreply 23October 8, 2022 6:03 AM

Oh no, I didn't realise you are only 34, OP! My advice is for those over 50, although you can use some of it. Keep your skin and teeth looking great, keep your grooming at a high level. You can slow things down a lot by ruthlessly editing your diet and habits, if you really want to. That means cutting out drinking, smoking and all unhealthy food, taking supplements, keeping your body in shape and using sunscreen.

It all becomes habit after a short while; do it, it's worth it.

R23

by Anonymousreply 24October 8, 2022 6:12 AM

The thinner and more in shape you are the older you will look. When your young, the skin is very elastic, thick pad of fat under to smooth over the muscles. When you are old, that subcutaneous fat melts away. You skin looks like wrinkled paper, but even worse, if you have muscle under there, now you look vainly and shredded. The face will look emaciated like you are dying of cancer barbecue it will look bony and unhealthy.

People who pack an extra 20 lbs in older age look a lot better than someone who is the same weight as when they were a young skinny adult.

by Anonymousreply 25October 8, 2022 6:12 AM

[quote] You skin looks like wrinkled paper, but even worse, if you have muscle under there, now you look vainly and shredded. The face will look emaciated like you are dying of cancer barbecue it will look bony and unhealthy.

You are one cruel motherfucker.

by Anonymousreply 26October 8, 2022 6:15 AM

I had to move back to my shitty-ass home state last week due to family tragedy and to help with much needed family business, likely in perpetuity in said shitty-ass home state. I'm financially tapped out from the move, funeral arrangements, and elder care. Cry me fucking river OP.

This was my attempt at making you feel better by reveling in the misfortune of others. Hope this helps.

by Anonymousreply 27October 8, 2022 6:16 AM

^ Oh, and I had to put my dog to sleep (cancer) in the middle of all of this. Again. River. Cry it. :)

by Anonymousreply 28October 8, 2022 6:19 AM

I'm sorry R27, that sucks. OP knows it's a first world problem though at least. Think about the Andes plane crash survivors. I use them all the time whenever I feel hungry or cold or just defeated in some way. I hope things get better and I'm sorry about your dog.

by Anonymousreply 29October 8, 2022 6:20 AM

r29 I know. That was my "dark" way and soothing OP's worries. Shit could be worse, I suppose.

And thanks. I'm just taking it one day at a time, as cliche as that sounds. DL is strangely cathartic with its theme of snark and brutal honesty.

by Anonymousreply 30October 8, 2022 6:26 AM

I hope another dog finds you, R30, one will when the time is right. As for the rest, yep, one day at a time. Some good will hopefully come of this.

by Anonymousreply 31October 8, 2022 6:31 AM

OP - I am 41 but am one of those DLe'rs who people think is in my early 30's. My secrets for staying young echo the posters above: sunscreen whenever I go out. stay in shape, going to the gym 6 x per week, I am tall, have a huge cock though I am a bottom, get a good haircut & basic grey blending at a good salon, and the rest is natural. White guys with buff bodies, no tats, big cocks, and a full head of hair are a fetish for many. All American good looks last so keep them up and enjoy. Eight hours sleep, minimal alcohol, and nutrition are all good suggestions as well.

by Anonymousreply 32October 8, 2022 6:52 AM

OP there’s no reason to be prematurely aged in your 30’s. What’s your diet like?

If you are eating a standard American diet, full of processed foods, conventional produce, soda, and hormone-injected, grain-Fed chicken and beef, stop. That diet will all but ensure you look like shit.

For whatever odd reason, most people don’t understand that what you put inside of your body manifests itself through your appearance.

The body is a collection of cells that are constantly renewing. When you consume 80% to 90% organic fruits (blueberries, raspberries, LOTS of bananas, etc) organic vegetables (dark green kale, raw onion, tomatoes, carrots, etc), seeds, sprouts, sprouted nuts, cold pressed olive oils, nut butters, cold pressed juices, and distilled water — your body’s cells will regenerate in such a way that you look younger. You can absolutely reverse the signs of aging if you stick with it.

I’m 36 almost 37, and most people assume I’m around 25 or will ask if I just graduated from college. Between ages 26 and 34 I was on a very restrictive low calorie, high nutrient organic raw vegan diet and completely retarded and reversed the aging process.

I’m still on the same mostly raw vegan organic diet but I’ve had to implement some high quality animal products since 2020. I’ve been consuming small amounts (less than 10% of diet) of wild caught salmon, organic grass fed beef, and organic eggs.

The only drawback is that this diet is exorbitantly expensive. I spend at least $1,200 a month, sometimes up to $1,500 a month on food. The cold pressed organic juices I buy are $12 for 16oz, for instance.

But the benefit is that I really am not aging normally at all as I approach 40. I’m not perfect, I do drink alcohol. If I gave that up, I could probably look even younger.

I have been called a loon and a crazy person for giving this advice in the past on here, but this diet really does work to slow/reverse aging. Most people just don’t have the interest, money, or dedication to actually commit to it.

One last thing to remember: for this to work, you need to make sure you’re consuming only organic produce. Conventional produce is filthy, full of toxic chemicals and pesticides and is very unhealthy. Good luck, OP.

by Anonymousreply 33October 8, 2022 6:54 AM

52 extremely pale with horrible skin. In shape but the body is only one part. The facial skin gives it away. It’s ironic - a tan makes me look great but the sun damage makes me look horrible when I don’t have a tan. At this point I’ve decided to just get the tan and milk these last days of being decent looking for all,I can. Someone is always better looking but I find I can still get some action/attention.

It’s all vanity and pointless and unfulfilling - including the sex. But that’s the joy of first world, comfortable existence - we get to worry about petty stuff like this. The hard part - physical ailments, incapacity and death - will come soon enough. Appreciate today.

by Anonymousreply 34October 8, 2022 7:08 AM

semen facials

by Anonymousreply 35October 8, 2022 7:22 AM

Having a waxed, tight, pink hole is very important to appearing young. Having a prolapsed hole with a slit and dried out sphincter lining is simply poor for, and not fit for purpose. Keep your hole tight, hairless, and low mileage. High mileage bottoms look weathered.

by Anonymousreply 36October 8, 2022 7:23 AM

R33, why not buy a juicer?

R34, why not find a good fake tan?

by Anonymousreply 37October 8, 2022 7:37 AM

R15 plenty of lucky men who look 60s get admiration, see current day Gary Cole. Some average men really get sexier with age. Not women though, that's cold hard facts.

On topic: beware of even sunny windows for sun exposure, especially if you are in East or West facing rooms that get direct sun. Buy thick blackout curtains if so. And I do not jog, bad for hip, knees, and sagging of jowls and possibly even nasolabial folds.

by Anonymousreply 38October 8, 2022 7:45 AM

I hear you, OP. First we human animals deal with how attractive we are in comparison to others. Then we deal with how attractive we are compared to ourselves in our prime. I try to keep my mind upon how lucky I am to mostly have my health, and he able to still get around and enjoy being upon this earth. The more my face looks my age, the more I appreciate expressing myself and my spirit with style and accessories and heart.

by Anonymousreply 39October 8, 2022 8:09 AM

People on here are obsessed with sunscreen, keeping out of the sun and not drinking alcohol. Yet in other threads they knock back any kind of pills and medication they can get their hands on.

Most people can drink alcohol and not be a raging alcoholic, just like you can eat food and not be obese.

by Anonymousreply 40October 8, 2022 8:12 AM

slightly related thought i’ve been having a lot lately (i live on the westside of los angeles, for reference):

have you ever noticed that Armenian, Persian, and other middle eastern men are almost universally STUNNING… until age 30? Olive skin, thick hair, athletic, virile, and horny looking young men.

then, all at once, POOF. Hair loss. Leathery skin. Hooked noses. Weight gain.

Conversely, the middle eastern women only get more handsome with time. Often a little gawky in their youth, but they become more and more buxom, dark, and mysterious as they mature…

by Anonymousreply 41October 8, 2022 8:19 AM

and if you are pickled, what do you think happens after you stop?

by Anonymousreply 42October 8, 2022 8:19 AM

I started using sunscreen this past year and my skin looks much better. I began drinking heavily when covid came and frankly quite enjoyed it. A couple of side effects of my drinking has been weight gain and excessive sweating. A couple of weeks ago I got an allergic reaction to something with I felt was connected to my excessive drinking so I stopped. I don’t know- feel better but still want a glass or 2.

by Anonymousreply 43October 8, 2022 8:49 AM

Make an appointment and go under the knife - You don't have to be ugly.

by Anonymousreply 44October 8, 2022 9:02 AM

I never enjoyed attention for my looks. Shrug.

by Anonymousreply 45October 8, 2022 9:34 AM

OP, if you are 34, then I am sure you don’t look old. Even if you look older than your age, I am sure you are still younger looking than you think.

With that in mind, what is your current skin care regimen like?

by Anonymousreply 46October 8, 2022 9:42 AM

[Quote] if you are 34, then I am sure you don’t look old

Don't be so sure.

by Anonymousreply 47October 8, 2022 9:43 AM

[quote]I have been outdoors a lot over the years and my heritage is almost 100% Scottish so I was fucked from the start

I had to laugh at this because that's been my problem, too. I'm mostly German, Scottish and Irish and spent every summer in the sun until I was in my mid 20s, then in my mid 40s, started getting little skin cancer scares, two on my face and one on my foot, of all places. No skin cancer yet but I figure it's coming.

For what it's worth, I noticed massive aging in my early 40s, and stopped drinking, started hydrating, wore high SPF sunscreen every time I went out, and I upped my moisturizer and serum routine, and I haven't aged that much since then. I looked too old for my age when I was 42, but now I'm 50 and I look a little young for my age. The only change has been a slightly receding hairline and some grays starting to show, but the face remains mostly the same.

You're only 34 so I'd give all the solid advice on here a try, because even if it just stops the aging process, you'll be glad for it in a few years.

by Anonymousreply 48October 8, 2022 9:47 AM

OP you’re British, right?

by Anonymousreply 49October 8, 2022 9:51 AM

I've noticed that people in their 30s have the strongest reaction to changes in their appearance. It is because their youth is ending and the first signs appear. By forty, you are used to crow's feet, and other facial lines.

by Anonymousreply 50October 8, 2022 9:52 AM

[quote] The thinner and more in shape you are the older you will look. When your young, the skin is very elastic, thick pad of fat under to smooth over the muscles. When you are old, that subcutaneous fat melts away. You skin looks like wrinkled paper, but even worse, if you have muscle under there, now you look vainly and shredded. The face will look emaciated like you are dying of cancer barbecue it will look bony and unhealthy. People who pack an extra 20 lbs in older age look a lot better than someone who is the same weight as when they were a young skinny adult.

TBH, sounds like you are trying really hard to justify those extra pounds you've packed on and don't want to lose.

by Anonymousreply 51October 8, 2022 9:56 AM

OP, you only had a 10 year run with your face, which doesn't sound like it was ever an 8, let alone a 9 or a 10. But you've got your health, and a fit body, and your hair. What else do you have? Big cock? A respectable profession? Nice supportive family? Do domestic animals like you?

There are lots of actions one can take to improve the facial appearance so pursue some of them but in moderation and work the other assets that you have and be thankful for them.

by Anonymousreply 52October 8, 2022 10:01 AM

These threads are always hilarious.

The reason you look younger than you are (if indeed you do) is genetics.

Some people will look younger than they are for most of their lives. They'll look 12 when they're 18 too.

Yes, really excessive tanning and hard living can have an affect, but seriously if you have two or three drinks a week and your exposure to the sun most days is going to and from work, then you're fine.

The only thing buying overpriced potions does is enrich the people who sell them.

by Anonymousreply 53October 8, 2022 10:02 AM

Don't exercise too much or too little OP. Moderate workouts are best I think. Unless you eat a lot of junk then go ahead and do everything you can to burn those calories. Contrary to a lot of posts above I really don't see any negative effects after drinking moderate alcohol. Doesn't hurt my complexion or make me gain weight.

I hear some people recommend retinol but I'm on the fence because my skin is sensitive and I don't want to inflame it.

by Anonymousreply 54October 8, 2022 10:04 AM

Because he was writing a parody post R37

Or at least I hope Juice Guy was

by Anonymousreply 55October 8, 2022 10:05 AM

[Quote] Don't exercise too much or too little OP.

Oh, shut up.

Invest in things other than being the "hot bitch," OP. That's it.

by Anonymousreply 56October 8, 2022 10:06 AM

[quote] Don't exercise too much or too little OP. Moderate workouts are best I think

E.g. "this is how I justify not exercising as much as I know I should."

by Anonymousreply 57October 8, 2022 10:07 AM

R53 you are wrong about "potions". A few are very helpful and not expensive. Prescription retinoids and night cream (does not need to be expensive). In the day: AHA then sunscreen, or why not a BB cream with SPF to even skin tone. Again, doesn't need to be expensive. These make a HUGE difference in the health and appearance of skin on the face and neck.

by Anonymousreply 58October 8, 2022 10:07 AM

semen is free

by Anonymousreply 59October 8, 2022 10:10 AM

R57 I'm not anti exercise. But if you walk a decent amount and eat lean and healthy I don't see the benefit after a certain point of ultra strenuous workouts. If the diet is bad and you're mostly sedentary that's another story.

by Anonymousreply 60October 8, 2022 10:11 AM

"I get called daddy a lot. And I get asked to do weird things like "call me Tiger" and I'm like "Ok, Tiger". (Tiger is pretty fucking cute actually, but I want a 50 year old boyfriend who wants me to call him by his real name. It's just not happening for me)."

I'd call you Jan, but you have to admit that I'm the Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!

by Anonymousreply 61October 8, 2022 10:11 AM

Totally agree at 44, R50.

[quote] For what it’s worth, I’m in very good shape, a lifelong athlete, white, have all my hair. Just look tired, sallow and like shit.

You don't look 'like shit.' You look normal. Aging is normal. It's more than normal; it's inevitable. People who mutilate themselves with anti-aging surgeries and procedures don't look younger at all. They are disfigured. They may smooth out and fill in areas but it is abnormal looking, not youthful.

Middle age is the period of transition between young adult and elderly. We think in those binaries for some reason, as if "normal" is looking 30 until you suddenly look 75. That's not how it works. It's gradual.

Reset your brain's understanding of what's normal.

When you look in the mirror, you see yourself in extreme close-up and you see things no one else on Earth sees. The lines, the wrinkles, the sallowness looks normal to other people and it looks like damage to you.

You may be tempted to smooth out all those wrinkles, and look in the mirror and see no wrinkles at all. Many people do this now. Click on the link to see what 'success' in smoothing everything out to look 'normal' ends up looking like.

Age one, age five, age 10, age 15, age 20, age 30 all look extremely different from one another, do they not? Well, the aging doesn't stop there. It IS normal. Imagine someone having surgery at age 20 to look age 10 or age 5. That would be insane, right? Insane. Abnormal. It is no less insane to expect to look at 45 as you did at 30. Biology doesn't do that.

[quote] Finding it hard to cope with my new invisibility.

You didn't say how old you are, but I will guess you're in your 30s.

I'm not young but I am old enough that I've primarily met other gay men via some online forum my entire life.

At age 18, I was inundated with messages every time I logged on, attention from people my age and people 60 and over, endlessly. It was annoying as hell. I evaded and ignored people because it was overwhelming.

Some felt predatory. That stopped in my early 20s and from then on it was still lots of attention but the unhinged old men went away.

Literally the day I changed a profile to age 30, interactions with other people dropped about 50 percent. It was alarming. I hated being swarmed by horny guys online all the years leading up to that, but by then, I felt like something was wrong with me with the sudden lack of attention. It dropped more and more every year.

I think around 38 was the year I felt truly invisible. Most people wouldn't respond to me if I showed my age on my profile. At least 30-40 percent more people would contact me if I didn't show my age.

By age 40—INVISIBLE. It hit hard, despite coming on gradually.

Now I am 44. I really don't care. I never, ever feel a desperate need for attention. It's very freeing. And when I was young, I was a sex addict. I had no choice but to break that addiction by age 40, and I'm very glad. There was never any fulfillment in random hookups for me—excitement, adrenaline, yes, but always disappointment after it was done.

In the end, I am way more content.

You need to recalibrate normalcy in your mind.

Getting older is normal. It's normal. It's normal.

Fighting it is crazy.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 62October 8, 2022 10:11 AM

there is some truth to r62. hit 30 and the interest dropped off no matter how you looked. hit 40 and be decently fit and kept up it exponentially expands. 50 and more interest than ever.

go with the flow.

by Anonymousreply 63October 8, 2022 10:16 AM

[quote]The only thing buying overpriced potions does is enrich the people who sell them.

My skin feels like it's going to crack if I don't use a moisturizer, and I generally use Cerave and The Ordinary brands, neither of which are "overpriced potions."

Enjoy smearing store-brand knock-offs of Jergens on your face, r53.

by Anonymousreply 64October 8, 2022 10:20 AM

R63 That is true in some ways. A couple of years ago, around age 41-42, there was a notable spike in interest on Grindr and Scruff, but I don't consider it real. It's almost entirely from guys under 25. Most either call me "daddy" when they send their first message or else 'daddies' is in their profile. I don't consider it authentic interest. It's fetishization of an age group that is trendy. It won't last, and I'm not at all interested in guys under 25, anyway. They're not looking for authentic human connections, and I think their minds are locked into fantasies of the currently popular incest-themed father/uncle/priest/doctor-authority porn that is omnipresent online. I'm not interested in that, and I believe the daddy fetish will be short-lived and it'll be back to anonymity for older gay men.

by Anonymousreply 65October 8, 2022 10:22 AM

Sandpaper cheeks? Are you roasting on a spit most days?

by Anonymousreply 66October 8, 2022 10:22 AM

think of the 85 year old found dead in a tree from Hurricane Ian

by Anonymousreply 67October 8, 2022 10:24 AM

R64 I don't think the person you quoted was saying "moisturizing is a bad idea." They specifically mentioned "overpriced potions."

Countless dermatologists have said and written that moisturizing is superficially beneficial over the long term, but that expensive luxury brands of these products are no better at all than drugstore brands. What matters is the ingredients, not the brand name and packaging.

by Anonymousreply 68October 8, 2022 10:26 AM

presenting hole to the crows...

by Anonymousreply 69October 8, 2022 10:28 AM

Superficially beneficial?

by Anonymousreply 70October 8, 2022 10:31 AM

You probably don't really look bad. Media and movies would have you think that every 35 year old still has the face of a 16/17 year old but that's not really true or natural. A lot of Americans seem to have skewed ideas of what constitutes looking old. Remember not looking 18/19 is not the same as looking 90. Despite what some would have you believe.

by Anonymousreply 71October 8, 2022 10:31 AM

Don't forget to moisturize, bitches! Every fucking day.

by Anonymousreply 72October 8, 2022 10:33 AM

OP, two words:

Earrings

Caftans!

by Anonymousreply 73October 8, 2022 10:49 AM

I have had the 'privilege' of meeting quite a few 'amazing looking' celebrities over 50, and all of them F-R-E-A-K-E-D me out when I met them. Have you ever stood face to face with someone whose face had been cut and pasted into the face of someone 'half their age'? It's disturbing. All I see is a thick rubbery mask that doesn't move under the skin, thick rubbery things inside the lips, a little triangle of flesh where a nose should be, incisions around the eyes where eyelid skin was sliced out.

All these people, men and women alike, look like accident victims to me in person. Like their faces went through a windshield and some talented doctor was able to rearrange the features in a way better than Picasso would but still...off.

The only procedure that I've seen well obscured to the point of not being distractingly freaky is the eyes, when a person is wearing bold-framed glasses that take attention away from the eyes.

The little triangle nose thing probably freaks me out the most because it's like a horror-show pumpkinfaced person, but the Botox-plus-injectables rubberfaced mask is about equal with it. That procedure does make people look pretty great in still photos, but to see someone's eyes and the inside of their mouth moving normally underneath a thick rubbery unmoving face is so fucking scary to me.

Besides famous people, I regularly encounter a woman through work who has a face like this and she is a sweet older lady but her face makes me feel like I am talking to a mass murderer from a horror movie and I always make our encounters brief so I can be away from her presence. Meanwhile, I usually love the company of older people. They don't give a shit, they're usually pretty thoughtful and wise, and it's disarming not to be in the presence of someone who tries too hard to look 'hot' at any age.

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by Anonymousreply 74October 8, 2022 10:59 AM

I'm 42 but my college students assume I'm mid 30s. I was looking rough in my late 30s, but then I quit smoking. I've been doing glycolic peels and my skin looks the best it has in 10 years.

Every heavy drinker I know looks like a dumpster by the time they hit their 30s. I drink, but very little. That's helps a lot.

by Anonymousreply 75October 8, 2022 3:39 PM

Like many DL threads this one is not hard to figure out

Fat ugly bald guys go on and on about how their skin "glows" and how it's their best feature because of all the money they spend on skin care.

If their butts or chests or smiles or faces were their best features, they would not be telling us about their skiin

by Anonymousreply 76October 8, 2022 6:55 PM

What I have seen is that the biggest ager of men & women = KIDS. Look at your everyday gay man vs. your married with children straight man. It's astonishing how quickly my straight friends have aged overnight after having kids. They are in their late 30's/early to mid 40's and even those who have money and can take care of themselves still have a weary, aged look about them.

Good surgery can be had if done well. I'm casually dating someone who is handsome, 50, had a absolutely fantastic hair transplant (he wasn't bald to begin with but wanted to fill in the receding edges), botox, and peels to the tune of 2K/month for upkeep. He "dermatologist" keeps pushing him to keep getting ahead of aging, but I think he needs to pump the breaks now. He looks good, but anymore and he is going to start looking waxen. We are about a decade apart and I don't mind the lines in my forehead. I have 2-3 creases, no crows feat, and do look younger. I can tell though that I am going to be one of those who will get jowly as I get older where a mini face lift or those internal hooks that pull your jawline up might be needed. Never say never, but I'd like to grow old naturally. I am not buying the "preventative" shit b/c once you start fucking with your face, even with botox, there is no going back.

The easiest and cheapest thing to do is work out hard, eat well, and have the best body you can. If you have a good, strong, fit body, that can do wonders and is in most people's control unless they have an illness or injury that prevents that.

by Anonymousreply 77October 8, 2022 7:07 PM

I’m just throwing this out there, but I don’t think it’s necessarily true that people don’t want to fuck older guys. If you’re in reasonably good shape and otherwise attractive, you can be appealing in your fifties or even sixties. The “silver fox” trope exists for a reason. I’m in my early thirties and have seen men in this age range that I would absolutely fuck.

by Anonymousreply 78October 8, 2022 7:59 PM

Schedule an appointment with a psychotherapist. This is about cognitive distortion not aged skin if you’re in your 30s.

by Anonymousreply 79October 8, 2022 8:01 PM

Even if you age well, there comes a time where you feel your age even if you don't look it. Enjoy what you have left because mid 40's is a bitch and late 50's is unbearable. Life isn't great for old single gay men, you really have to be a social person and be happy with old gay person stuff. Personally I'm almost 60 and it just seems like I'm ticking off the days with nothing to look forward to except uncertainty. OP be thankful that you had an active 20's.

by Anonymousreply 80October 8, 2022 8:10 PM

Most people are very surprised when I tell them I’m 63. It’s strange but they would guess 55. I’ll take that any day of the week.

It’s not that I look much younger, it’s rather I don’t act old.

I make no illusion, I’m an elder gay. I got an amazing husband, good sex life and we’re both excellent cooks.

by Anonymousreply 81October 8, 2022 8:22 PM

OP, see a dermatologist.

IMO, unless you have genetically bad skin (acne-prone, rosacea), bad skin is just a barometer of everything else.

Drink more water, sunscreen, less drinking, less coffee, more sleep, better food.

by Anonymousreply 82October 8, 2022 8:35 PM

A frau recommended this product. I think it might be helpful to you, OP. One puts it on a cotton ball then dilutes it a bit with water before wiping down the face. Twice a day.

At night one applies retin-A afterwards.

This regimen was given to my hag by a Swiss cosmetic surgeon. It works nicely for me, but one has to take care in the shaving area. Don't apply Acerbine after shaving!

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by Anonymousreply 83October 8, 2022 8:52 PM

[quote][R15] plenty of lucky men who look 60s get admiration, see current day Gary Cole.

Yeeeeah, I'm gonna need you to rewrite this sentence using a different public figure as an example because...no.

If you could have that in by tomorrow, that would be great.

by Anonymousreply 84October 8, 2022 9:40 PM

R11, so freakin true ! And it causes depression and anxiety. We don’t need it and it lies to you

by Anonymousreply 85October 8, 2022 9:46 PM

R81, feeling young and vibrant does wonders for your mental and physical health. Your soul will glow . You think like an old person, you become one . I think being energetic and enthusiastic about life with no serious physical limitations is more important on how youthful you look ❤️

by Anonymousreply 86October 8, 2022 9:49 PM

Remember boys, looking good for your age can still mean you look old. It’s better to focus on figuring out how to untie your self worth from your appearance.

by Anonymousreply 87October 8, 2022 9:54 PM

👆🏼🤗🙌. So true ! And get involved with fulfilling activities etc . A lot of middle age people ( and even seniors) are active and enjoying a full life .

by Anonymousreply 88October 8, 2022 10:01 PM

R87, it’s more important to be feeling good for your age . Fall in love with life and you will become youthful in spirit

by Anonymousreply 89October 8, 2022 10:02 PM

The older you get the more you realize that good health is way more important than how you look. Feeling good and being mobile to do the things you want means more than all the money in the world. You could be a billionaire, but if you're sickly what good is it

by Anonymousreply 90October 8, 2022 10:29 PM

[quote]"I get called daddy a lot. And I get asked to do weird things like "call me Tiger" and I'm like "Ok, Tiger". (Tiger is pretty fucking cute actually, but I want a 50 year old boyfriend who wants me to call him by his real name. It's just not happening for me)."

[quote]I'd call you Jan, but you have to admit that I'm the Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!

Ok, Marcia.

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by Anonymousreply 91October 8, 2022 10:36 PM

^ Wow, you went to a lot of trouble to put that together, WW 👍

by Anonymousreply 92October 8, 2022 10:51 PM

My face is the only part of me that’s aged well. I’m mid-forties, and sadly very fat. I’m struggling to lose weight, and find it incredibly difficult. I loathe my body. It’s painful to see myself.

Physically, my face is my saving grace really. I wouldn’t say I was especially handsome, but I have a clean-cut, open friendly look which works for me. People warm to me easily, and I occasionally attract people who I think are much more attractive than me. That’s partially due to my personality though. I’m genuinely interested in other people, and most people respond to that.

I’m sometimes sad that I have gone through life never thinking that I am good-looking. I try not to hate myself too much for my body. Without wishing to sound like a self-help book, it is important to feel gratitude for the fact that my poor besieged body has kept me going without too many problems for decades. That seems like a special blessing this week when a friend of mine has been diagnosed with MS. There but for the grace of God (or sheer dumb luck), go I.

by Anonymousreply 93October 8, 2022 10:56 PM

👆🏼 don’t loathe your body , it kills the soul . Practice self love / self care

by Anonymousreply 94October 8, 2022 10:57 PM

Look, R92. I'm sorry you look like bread mold at your age. But don't take it out on me, ok?

by Anonymousreply 95October 8, 2022 11:11 PM

[quote] Fall in love with life and you will become youthful in spirit

Thanks, Oprah.

by Anonymousreply 96October 8, 2022 11:12 PM

R78 yes, I agree older men still are hot. When I was in my 30s and would look at older men I was worried that I wasn't particularly drawn to them and then I worried I'd be one of those assholes who's banging young guys and looking foolish. Luckily, now in my late 40's it just naturally progressed that the people I'm attracted to are my age or older. I really don't glance at young guys too much.

R93 aww, bless you! You're better off than us vapid people who are crying about not getting hit up so much. Walk, walk, walk! I walk about 9 miles a day at work and am in such great shape, it's the only exercise I do. My legs, obliques and ass look great. I've lost like 23 pounds since lockdown and haven't put it back on. You can do it too. Every journey begins with a single step. And keep your lovely, open face moisturized and drink lots of water. I would hook up with an overweight guy over a thin one anyday. There's someone for you too!

by Anonymousreply 97October 8, 2022 11:12 PM

I find our looks age in spurts. One day you're looking late forties in your mid fifties. Then you wake up the next day and you see you've added another 5 years

by Anonymousreply 98October 9, 2022 1:04 AM

I was at the gym and I thought of this thread. I saw a guy who would not have been the biggest looker look so hot with a fit body. Men of all age, if you are healthy and mobile, is join the nicest gym you can afford and use it often. Make it a sanctuary. Even at gyms where people might think the clientele are assholes, I think most people applaud people who are overweight slugging it away. It's admirable. The gym is the best investment - it's a winner all around - looks, health, mind, body and steam jo sessions on top of all that.

by Anonymousreply 99October 9, 2022 1:15 AM

thick blackout curtains

This is a joke I hope.

by Anonymousreply 100October 9, 2022 1:18 AM

Good advice! I'll rejoin my gym. Promise.

by Anonymousreply 101October 9, 2022 1:20 AM

so Thomas Roberts turned 50 and has located back to Baltimore....what else?

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by Anonymousreply 102October 9, 2022 3:01 AM

@r95, I was complimenting you on your effort, sure as hell won't do that again ☹️

Let no good deed on DL go without catching shit for it

by Anonymousreply 103October 9, 2022 3:19 AM

As said, smoking drinking sun are the killers. So is a job with hard physical labor or high stress. Or a wife and kids. Add in chronic illness too.

by Anonymousreply 104October 9, 2022 3:25 AM

Well then my apologies , r103. "you went to a lot of trouble to put that together" didn't seem very complimentary.

No hard feelings.

by Anonymousreply 105October 9, 2022 3:32 AM

^ That's why I added the "WW" and thumbs up 👍, because I hate being misunderstood, but always am

by Anonymousreply 106October 9, 2022 3:38 AM

Just go to a place like England with a heavy drinking culture and look at the faces. They're gone by 40.

by Anonymousreply 107October 9, 2022 3:43 AM

[quote]^ That's why I added the "WW" and thumbs up 👍, because I hate being misunderstood, but always am.

I think my apology and you're explanation are equally sincere.

by Anonymousreply 108October 9, 2022 3:45 AM

^ Equally boring. R91 is nuts. A troll. He who posts here on DL, all day and night. Answers his own posts from other devices. Check out how much he W&Ws his own dumb posts.

We pray for his healing and deliverance. Anyone who says "Sure Jan" is at least 75 years old. Soon come jesus to deliver you back to your happiest time, R91.

by Anonymousreply 109October 9, 2022 3:55 AM

R77 Your boyfriend sounds absolutely tragic, an elder gay desperately trying to look young and afraid of ageing. I can just picture what his wardrobe looks like. I bet everyone who knows him or works with him sniggers at him behind his back.

by Anonymousreply 110October 9, 2022 5:55 AM

Thin lipped, assless whites age horribly, OP. Nothing you can do about that but wish you was black.

by Anonymousreply 111October 9, 2022 6:03 AM

R4- Growing old ain’t for sissies, drink lots of water 💦

You are FULL of cliches.

by Anonymousreply 112October 9, 2022 6:19 AM

Go to the gym much more aggressively than you've ever done before. If you focus on manually improving, it will help distract from the involuntary degrading happening to your body and appearance. After you lose 20 lbs, you'll feel younger. Then get a new hairstyle, wardrobe, and perhaps a new facial hair style. Switch up your look, because if you dress and groom yourself just like you did in your 20s, the differences in your physical appearance are even more noticeable to you. It's why women usually chop off their hair and switch up the color every few years. It's why they throw away clothes after a year or two. Get some thick framed glasses and a few expensive sweaters. Dress like a 50 yo, and you'll def look young for your age. Balding? Shave it all off now! Rip the band aid off and learn to love your skull. It's harder for men, because we don't get advice on how to deal with aging.

by Anonymousreply 113October 9, 2022 6:27 AM

Am I the only one here on DL who doesn’t look 10-20 years younger?

Don't worry. Like many Dataloungers you managed to include a humblebrag in your complaint:

"For what it’s worth, I’m in very good shape, a lifelong athlete, white, have all my hair. Just look tired, sallow and like shit. Finding it hard to cope with my new invisibility."

P.S. telling us that you're an older white man explains a lot about you.

You should have led with that.

by Anonymousreply 114October 9, 2022 6:36 AM

Not a surprise my post on organic raw diet got like no traction, despite being the only natural way to reverse and freeze aging. Oh well.

Jared Leto is 50 and follows a raw vegan organic diet very similar to mine. He is the youngest looking 50 year-old I’ve ever seen both in face and body. It works but most people deluded themselves into believing aging well is all up to genetics, when a lot of it is what you eat.

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by Anonymousreply 115October 9, 2022 6:46 AM

[quote] Jared Leto is 50 and follows a raw vegan organic diet very similar to mine. He is the youngest looking 50 year-old I’ve ever seen both in face and body. It works but most people deluded themselves into believing aging well is all up to genetics, when a lot of it is what you eat.

True, but I've seen the opposite happen as well. There are a lot of hot guys who go vegan and show before/after photos and they look like hell. I think eating plenty of vegan foods are good, but it can also be damaging to the body and age you. Also, the photo of Leto is heavily photoshopped. They cinched his midsection in - you can see the shoddy work. Still, I think Leto looks good and with the right cosmetic surgery/botox, 50 can look like the new 40.

by Anonymousreply 116October 9, 2022 6:52 AM

Jared Leto is a totally toxed and filled photoshopped tranny with hair extensions. She looks hollow, not healthy.

by Anonymousreply 117October 9, 2022 7:25 AM

[quote]Im 61 and look it . I quit caring about all that years ago. I do however,keep myself well groomed and try to dress ok,but not with the dedication I had 20 years ago. Dont take it all so personally Op ,nobody wants to fuck old people. Not even other old people. All these bitches on here talking about "Im 60 and have hot hung college students dying to fuck me " are LIARS. Nobody wants to fuck an old person.

I'm the same age R15 but have had may be another experience.

In my 20s I was so hyperselective that I barely paid attention to anyone whom I didn't fancy; my vein of interest was a narrow one, maybe, but rich. In my 30s, I was more relaxed, more secure, and more aware of what I had on offer; it was also a time when I became aware that the men I had always felt most comfortable with, men 10, 15, 20 years older were now of an age to be in a somewhat different orbit, with different concerns: men in their 40s, 50s, and 60s were looking for a mate, had sworn off quick fucks or alcohol or drugs or nightlife and taken up moisturizers and healthy foods and what they saw as an age-appropriate wardrobe and behaviors. I had plenty of sex in my 30s, but it was a changed environment with some different rules, and some differences in myself, too, as it was the first time I fucked men within a narrower and age range, including the very occasional younger than me. My 40s, though, were a renaissance of some sort: I was attractive to older men, to younger men, and to men my age with seemingly equal enthusiasm, more than in my 30s; and to my surprise this carried through my 50s, with the one difference in that the number of younger men interested in me shot way up and the number of older men interested in me declined. In my 60s I have a partner and am not actively looking for other men; they have to find me and make it fairly explicit what they want to catch my attention because I'm just not attuned to it. I'm not on high alert for signs of interest, and I'm less likely to meet new people outside circles of friends. Except for the occasional wants-to-fuck-everyone-once guy who's my age or a bit older, almost all of these men are in their mid 20s and early 30s. It happens.

I don't moisuturize, don't apply sunscreen, don't pull closed the blackout curtains when a ray of sun hits the window, don't go to the gym, don't wear luxury trappings, don't have my hair tinted, don't have small elective surgical procedures, and don't look 22. I drink, but only socially; I eat reasonably; I get a fair amount of everyday exercise; and, relative my 20s, take some small additional care to get a decent haircut and put wear some clothes that don't look too shabby when leaving the house. For me, more important than slathering myself with moisturizer is staying engaged with the world, to keep up with and expand my interests, to try to be a better friend, to be a better listener, to show more interest in what others are doing -- to invite a friend I don't know that well for a drink to celebrate his promotion at work, to organize a relaxed day with good friends and invite a potential friend or two.

Invisibility isn't only measured in how many men in any given room show interest in wanting to fuck you. Invisibility is also growing old and casting off all of your imperfect friends one by one because you suspect you couldn't depend on them to volunteer to collect you from your colonoscopy on Tuesday mid-afternoon; or because they seem less than excited at the prospect of watching your Chihuahua Tippy while you spend two months at Mother's; or because you disappear into a fog of nostalgia where you one pleasure if watching the entire back catalogue of Barnaby Jones over and fucking over again.

by Anonymousreply 118October 9, 2022 9:35 AM

People who love you won't care how old you look. But can you love your "old" self?

by Anonymousreply 119October 9, 2022 10:15 AM

You know what the saddest thing about this thread is?

That so many posters have written long essays about their fading looks over the years

The obsession is such a sad reflection on so many gay men's lives

by Anonymousreply 120October 9, 2022 10:54 AM

[quote] The obsession is such a sad reflection on so many gay men's lives

This is so wrong. I'm 70 and have never met a person, gay or straight, man or woman who hasn't expressed sadness at the loss of youth and beauty. It's the subject of literature--Death in Venice anyone?

The hardest part is when you are young and notice the first signs of aging--the gray strand of hair, the single frown crease on the forehead, the faint shadows under the eyes, the first time a hot guy looks away and doesn't look again....

I still take some pride and care in the way I present myself to the world but am resigned to being perceived as old and irrelevant. I was attractive and now I'm not. I was young and now I'm not. I was hot and now I'm not. Life is funny that way.

by Anonymousreply 121October 9, 2022 11:23 AM

[quote]For what it’s worth, I’m in very good shape, a lifelong athlete, [bold]white[/bold]

Da fuq does that have to with anything?

by Anonymousreply 122October 9, 2022 11:56 AM

R118- Every other queen on every thread about how to age well or look younger mentions staying out of the sun , moisturizing etc

How about not drinking, smoking or taking drugs plus eating a lot of fruits and vegetables and few sweets and processed foods and exercising ( walking) thirty minutes a day.

by Anonymousreply 123October 9, 2022 12:55 PM

OP- If you want to age well and live long don't be like these two

FAT WHORES.

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by Anonymousreply 124October 9, 2022 12:57 PM

Just remember. Wilford Brimley was 51 in Cocoon.

Now. How old do you look on the Wilford Brimley scale, OP?

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by Anonymousreply 125October 9, 2022 1:04 PM

R121 proving out R120

by Anonymousreply 126October 9, 2022 1:08 PM

[quote] Go to the gym much more aggressively than you've ever done before. If you focus on manually improving, it will help distract from the involuntary degrading happening to your body and appearance. After you lose 20 lbs, you'll feel younger.

I'm not the OP, but just a response to this. I try this in fits and starts but I have a medical condition that makes it impossible for me to strain myself too much physically. Heating up causes anaphylaxis, which can range from all-over hives, wheezing and asthma to my throat swelling, severe gastric pain and diarrhea, blurry vision and feeling like I am going to black out. (I never have lost consciousness, but I get disoriented.)

I started a new injectable monthly treatment last spring that improved these symptoms and I worked out 3-5 days for about three months with increasing intensity and then had a major relapse and have been exercise sensitive since then.

Obviously, this is uncommon and for this online community, it's probably unique to me.

I'm bringing it up for two reasons:

First, people who are healthy and have a lot of vitality *always* assume everyone else shares these qualities, and that other people are lazy losers if they aren't religious about gym visits and presenting themselves as close to models as possible. A lot of people for a lot of different reasons are incapable of working out like and looking like athletes. Young people and gay men seem all to think this way, and people who can't measure up to modelesque standards feel like failures at life. That's a choice but it's really hard to see through the lie of it when people tell you that if you can't be a semi-professional athlete for the sake of looking fuckable, you're not trying.

Second, more importantly, nearly everyone at some point will be forced by their body to accept limitations. If you live long enough, you won't be able to keep up these standards and inevitably you will have to accept failure to be young and hard bodied forever. You will inevitably have to accept giving up the validation-through-every-stranger-wanting-to-fuck-you if that is how you get validation in life. Unless you drop dead tragically from an aneurysm rupture or cardiac arrest while squatting 550 lb at the gym, you will get old, and aging is a disease-adjacent condition that will absolutely limit your abilities and your fuckworthiness.

If you're 35 and fighting time, time will still catch up to you at 45, 50 or 60. Eventually, it's going to get you no matter how hard you run. You can let it chase you until you hit that wall hard and go through delayed midlife crisis, or you can accept sooner that you're an animal with a specific physiological timeline and you cannot work out or be surgically altered to be young and fuckable for eternity. If you can't deal with that, really can't, then you'll need to find a way to die tragically while young and beautiful because that is the ONLY alternative to accepting aging and some eventual physical limitations. It's a fool's mission to outrun father time.

by Anonymousreply 127October 9, 2022 1:16 PM

R115 I find Leto's twink-at-50 body pretty astonishing. And that said, his face is scary to me and it shows a hell of a lot of medical intervention. There is a reason he distracts from his face with long hair, a scraggly beard and sunglasses. The guy is in denial about not being the 22 year-old It Boy and what I see in the photo you posted is someone who desperately wants to be seen as young and fuckable.

As I said, his physique is remarkable for someone who is 50. So remarkable, I don't believe it would look like that without various body-contouring procedures like liposuction and coolsculpting. Bodies naturally broaden, male and female, into 'old broads,' and we natually accumulate fat in various areas. I have never met a vegan who eats the vegan diet of a rabbit, either, and vegetarian diets tend to lead to bodies like those of vegetarian animals. Looking at his facial rearrangements, it's silly not to assume he has had a lot of fat sucked out of his body and things lifted over the decades.

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by Anonymousreply 128October 9, 2022 1:25 PM

Jared Leto has hard work done as well.

by Anonymousreply 129October 9, 2022 1:33 PM

Jared's face entered Uncanny Valley perhaps a decade ago.

He should hook up with Jared Kushner and go on the road as fright show.

by Anonymousreply 130October 9, 2022 1:35 PM

I met an actress who has been lauded for appearing 'ageless' and in person she looked like a sideshow act. Her face was really freaky looking that I couldn't help diverting my eyes. I realized what looks good on camera under studio lighting can be quite different than what looks good, even human, in real life.

by Anonymousreply 131October 9, 2022 1:46 PM

Who R131? Being coy is stupid

by Anonymousreply 132October 9, 2022 2:44 PM

R128 Are you serious? You really think every fifty year old in Scottsdale doesn't look like that? Every 50 year old in San Diego? It's not that impressive, it's from starving and not having any belly fat, no doubt he does drugs to stave off hunger. I fucking hate Leto and he's always been a knob and there are many people better or similar looking.

by Anonymousreply 133October 9, 2022 2:49 PM

drink in moderation, stay out of the sun and stop smoking if you still do

by Anonymousreply 134October 9, 2022 2:51 PM

[quote] You really think every fifty year old in Scottsdale doesn't look like that?

Scottsdale?!

😂

by Anonymousreply 135October 9, 2022 2:57 PM

takeaway: Scottsdale is Mecca for fat-free fifty year old hot fuckers.

by Anonymousreply 136October 9, 2022 3:00 PM

Yes, Scottsdale, R135, why are you shocked? There's a gym there they all go to, they all are buff, it's not that hard to find people that are vain in Scottsdale.

by Anonymousreply 137October 9, 2022 3:04 PM

There are a lot of benefits to clean living aside from looking better. Your senses are sharper, you think more clearly, you prevent avoidable degeneration of your body, you avoid disability and you live a better and longer life. READ up on the effects of sugar, alcohol, smoking, drugs, processed food, excess weight, and unprotected sun exposure.

by Anonymousreply 138October 9, 2022 3:07 PM

[quote]The thinner and more in shape you are the older you will look.

That applies only to women.

Having seen literally thousands of naked men of all ages, I can state with certainty that the best looking older men 60+ are those who have maintained a lean mass throughout life, i.e. with low body fat. Very muscular men remain fit but don't look as young as those with lean mass.

by Anonymousreply 139October 9, 2022 3:09 PM

OP, thanks for this post, luv. You made my day.

by Anonymousreply 140October 9, 2022 3:12 PM

R116 The optimal diet really has a lot to do with blood type and genetics as well. Vegan isn't for everyone, and some do better with a more Keto-like diet. Others do better with vegetarian.

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by Anonymousreply 141October 9, 2022 3:14 PM

It bewilders me why anyone who is depressed by their appearance, and has the money, doesn't consult a leading plastic surgeon.

Not everyone ages 'neatly', but a good surgeon can move you into that category: you won't look younger, but you will look less hang dog.

What kind of protestant guilt fuckery is restraining you from doing something about it?

VISIT, FIX IT, DONE. You only live once: make it the best it can be.

It's like those people who work around with corns on their face, and never have them whipped off.

by Anonymousreply 142October 9, 2022 3:16 PM

There are a lucky few who look great as they age. Exercise and diet, abstention from drinking and smoking help. These lucky few also have great genes and good bone structure. Another factor for the way one's aging face looks is emotional health. Negative emotions and ill intent play out on the face and settle into lines and grooves.

by Anonymousreply 143October 9, 2022 3:20 PM

[quote]As I said, his physique is remarkable for someone who is 50.

No it's not. Look at crowd pics from before the mid-60s, before fast food and fructose. Most everyone was lean, even when older. However Americans ate too much even then. During WW2, the English and colonial populations servicing the incoming American army and navy were astounded at how much their men ate.

by Anonymousreply 144October 9, 2022 3:31 PM

Whether Leto has had minor work is irrelevant. Look at his skin quality and tautness; his neotenous features in proportion to his face common with those under 30, and his body.

The reason I know Leto follows my diet is because of his facial proportions, slim frame, and wrinkle-free lean body. People who eat standard American diets find that their face and body widens as they age, and their facial features proportions change from that of a young person to that of a middle aged person sometimes as soon as their early 30s.

Leto and I have the same facial proportions of a 25 year old and the same skin tautness and skin quality of someone in their 20s. This is impossible on a standard American diet after age 30-35, period.

You people arguing that the sum of Leto’s incredible looks at 50 is only a result plastic surgery and lipo are ignorant. You cannot look like Jared Leto at 50 eating a standard American diet, doing drugs, drinking lots of alcohol, even if you have a lot of plastic surgery.

I’ve always found it odd how obsessed some people are with staying young, complement me on my looks, and then I tell them my secret — and they come up with excuses as to how they’d fail at the organic raw vegan diet or attribute my looks to only genetics.

My mom is 69 and got on the diet at my insistence at around 62band reversed many signs of aging. She looks amazing and people assume she has a college-aged son, when I’m actually almost 37.

The mostly raw vegan works but few people commit it to see long term results.

by Anonymousreply 145October 9, 2022 3:32 PM

[quote} The reason I know Leto follows my diet is because of his facial proportions, slim frame, and wrinkle-free lean body. People who eat standard American diets find that their face and body widens as they age, and their facial features proportions change from that of a young person to that of a middle aged person sometimes as soon as their early 30s. Leto and I have the same facial proportions of a 25 year old and the same skin tautness and skin quality of someone in their 20s. This is impossible on a standard American diet after age 30-35, period.

GURL......

by Anonymousreply 146October 9, 2022 3:45 PM

R146 Lol, yep. It's so very "I'm 60 but look 25 and hang out at Abercrombie"

by Anonymousreply 147October 9, 2022 3:48 PM

[quote] Leto and I have the same facial proportions of a 25 year old and the same skin tautness and skin quality of someone in their 20s. This is impossible on a standard American diet after age 30-35, period.

Haha...wow. When you die at age 104 (looking a dewy 24!), please have yourself taxidermied and mailed to Muriel so that she can make you the official mascot of Data Lounge. You are spectacular...basically the spirit of Donald Trump within a gay mind and body.

by Anonymousreply 148October 9, 2022 4:01 PM

R141 Remember the Dalai Lama, who once tried to go vegetarian but his health suffered and he had to go back to meat eating. Still, he looks pretty good for his age and weight.

by Anonymousreply 149October 9, 2022 4:13 PM

R145 Do us all a favour, instead of telling us how young and fantastic you look, post a pic and let us decide for ourselves. Self praise is no praise…

by Anonymousreply 150October 9, 2022 4:21 PM

I would say that if I could choose anyone to emulate in the aging department, it would be Ryan Philipe at 48/49. He looks fantastic even with the obvious tweaks to his face, which to me doesn't look drastic. This is where I think the low stress, low responsibility life plays into things. He works out, is always on vacations, fucking younger chicks, has a solid relationship with the bank of R. Witherspoon. I've met him in person a few times and he looks phenomenal.

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by Anonymousreply 151October 9, 2022 4:36 PM

Ryan is one person who never need apologize for tagging any photo of himself with #blessed. From the top of his golden curls down to his heels, the guy was designed by a master builder.

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by Anonymousreply 152October 9, 2022 4:45 PM

I won’t be posting pics of myself, R150. OP asked for advice on how to improve his looks because he is unsatisfied with how he’s aging in his early 30s, and I gave him advice on what’s worked for me, and cited Jared Leto as someone who follows a similar diet.

Then other posters came in ignorantly accusing Leto of lots of plastic surgery, despite knowing damn well his look is impossible with just surgery alone at 50. Whatever. I couldn’t give two shits if you or other posters believe me or not. I don’t stick with this for bragging rights or approval, I stick with it because it makes me feel great.

That said, I will continue spreading the word about the wonders of this diet to anyone who asks about anti-aging on this forum. If you or others don’t like it, block me and fuck off.

by Anonymousreply 153October 9, 2022 4:50 PM

yes, R152. Those photos, THANK YOU DL FOR THIS GIFT, are my favorite party trick. I love showing everyone RP's cock and everyone salivates in awe. I always though he was beautiful but never expected him to have a cock like that. It was like Christmas and my birthday all wrapped up into one. The perfect man - gorgeous body, face, ass, cock. He is a little short, but I don't care about height.

by Anonymousreply 154October 9, 2022 4:50 PM

[quote] Then other posters came in ignorantly accusing Leto of lots of plastic surgery, despite knowing damn well his look is impossible with just surgery alone at 50. Whatever. I couldn’t give two shits if you or other posters believe me or not. I don’t stick with this for bragging rights or approval, I stick with it because it makes me feel great.

Me thinks the lady doth protest too much!

by Anonymousreply 155October 9, 2022 4:52 PM

there are now multiple non-invasive procedures.

easy peasy for him to get.

by Anonymousreply 156October 9, 2022 4:53 PM

R153 I can believe you. Your words alone radiate youthful vitality. I'm 44 and I looked about 45 before, and after having just read your posts, I've felt the divine wash through me. I just looked in my selfie cam, and I don't look a day over 26 now! Thank you! Please continue to impart your magic. Were I to see you in person and mistake you for 25, I'd fall to the Earth and kiss the ground you walk upon that the trail of your sent would make me younger yet.

by Anonymousreply 157October 9, 2022 4:54 PM

Jared Leto isn't even attractive. Dude's face doesn't move when he smiles. His features are too close together and he looks all of 5 years younger than his actual age. He's also a creep. He looks a lot like Courtney Cox.

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by Anonymousreply 158October 9, 2022 5:11 PM

Working out 2 to 3 hours a day and eating nothing but nuts and lentils can make you look like Jared Leto. AND about $250,000 worth of plastic surgery.

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by Anonymousreply 159October 9, 2022 5:24 PM

People are so gullible, reading and believing what a celebrity tells them about their diet, how they've had no plastic surgery, do no drugs, etc.

Also, whether or not Leto is your cup of tea, he's obviously hot to a lot of fans. The secret to his looks (face, bone structure) is largely genetic (luck) and also largely plastic surgery.

by Anonymousreply 160October 9, 2022 5:33 PM

Jared Leto... 🤮

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by Anonymousreply 161October 9, 2022 6:32 PM

R145, I live in a vegan haven and most vegans don’t look healthy . Many are doughy and pale . They seem to not have much charisma either

by Anonymousreply 162October 10, 2022 1:08 AM

R151- Ryan Phillipe is 100% GAY

he looks like a TRANSMEN in that photo.

by Anonymousreply 163October 10, 2022 1:19 AM

R163 I agree, he looks trans to me.

by Anonymousreply 164October 10, 2022 5:42 AM

A lot of vegans put on weight because they are eating so many pulses and grains.

by Anonymousreply 165October 10, 2022 5:54 AM

Get some sleep.

by Anonymousreply 166October 10, 2022 6:14 AM

meanwhile black and asian gays just keep going and going and going - often well into their 50’s.

“TOUCH THIS SKIN, DARLING.”

by Anonymousreply 167October 10, 2022 6:15 AM

It only takes a few seconds a day to moisturize.

by Anonymousreply 168October 10, 2022 6:34 AM

Maybe you're invisible for another reason, OP, because a 34 year old white guy who's in shape with all his hair should attract plenty of attention. Could it be your grooming? Your dress? Do you give off a negative message,eg scary, in the way you appear? Do you smile and make eye contact with people? Are you always looking at your phone?

by Anonymousreply 169October 10, 2022 6:50 AM

He already said he has bad skin due to sun damage. No amount of grooming or personality will fix that.

by Anonymousreply 170October 10, 2022 7:00 AM

How much sun damage could he have? He hasn't been a filed worker for the last 30 years. A bit of IPL or laser will fix whatever damage he has.

by Anonymousreply 171October 10, 2022 11:59 AM

R168- Eating lots of plant foods - fruits ,vegetables, whole grains, nuts, seeds and beans go a lot further in maintaining youthful skin than moisturizing.

by Anonymousreply 172October 10, 2022 1:02 PM

First of all you need to change your eating lifestyle and only get proper quality nutrition. Avoid bad fats and oils and only eat foods with extra virgin olive oil (from a single source) avocado oil, and coconut oil. Remove all processed foods and limit grains,breads, pastas and starches from you diet. Dairy is bad for you, switch to goat milk products such as cheese and kefir. Don't drink any alcohol except for the occasional wine.If you eat meats be sure they are pasture raised. If you can afford organic do it, or at least look for products with the Non-GMO label. Have fruit sparingly, veggies are better for you.

by Anonymousreply 173October 10, 2022 1:12 PM

R173- Wrong. You should eat fruit everyday if possible. Fruit is generally high in fiber and micronutrients. Eating a wide variety of fruits insures you're getting an abundance of nutrients.

by Anonymousreply 174October 10, 2022 1:23 PM

Move to Minnesota, where's it's cold and you'll keep better 😉

by Anonymousreply 175October 10, 2022 1:24 PM

Some people call themselves 'vegans' because they eat no meat when a more apt description of their eating habits would be 'junk food junkie'. If potato chips and carbs are your main staples, of course you will look like shit. Carb face is a real thing. They often look similar to alcoholics. Vegans who mainly eat veggies and nuts and stuff look great.

Eat lots of veggies, some fruits, nuts, lentils, complex carbs, some lean meat or other protein and keep sugar down to a minimum and you will look your best. Sugar and high-glycemic foods really damage the skin. They also mess with your body's insulin response. Your body will use a lot of its resources repairing the damage, leaving you with little energy to exercise and do other worthwhile things.

by Anonymousreply 176October 10, 2022 2:14 PM

R174 Wrong. While fruits do have nutrients, most vegetables have more and without the sugar. If you want fruits do not have it every day.

by Anonymousreply 177October 10, 2022 4:32 PM

"Time and tide wait for no man. "-- Geoffrey Chaucer

If you have already "not aged well," then the horse has already left the barn. There is not much you can do about it now. Some people get some work done (but that may or may not make you look better and of course, once you start that it's a never ending cycle as you will have to continue getting touch ups the rest of your life to avoid looking WORSE). [Someone should have told this to Burt Reynolds and Kenny Rodgers] Too much would be outside of your control. I would NOT recommend going this route.

All you can do at this point is try to prevent further bad aging by following the tips others above have already stated. You will never again have the attractiveness of your youth! ACCEPT IT!

The good thing is that you are in shape. Keep it up. Most men in their 40s and 50s have bodies that look like shit. In a few years you will instantly look as good if not better than your peers if your body is tight. You can be a hot ZADDY!

In the gay world, keeping as fit as you can will pay huge dividends for the rest of your life, regardless of what your face looks like. You'll be ok.

by Anonymousreply 178October 10, 2022 7:06 PM

Hey vegan troll, we should have a healthy food-off. I too am vegan, my diet would blow minds and cause depression here (not out of envy but because it is pretty gross in terms of taste). Do i feel 1000% better eating this way than I did before, eating the usual shite diet? Yes. Shockingly so. I could go on and on about how much better I feel, including psychologically. This has done more for me than any anti-depressant ever has (and SSRIs worked pretty OK for me). As I type this up my food for the day (other than dinner, which will BROL - barley, rye, oats, lentils and yes that shit is just as delicious as it sounds ha ha) is sitting beside me, a huge bowl of: red cabbage, carrot, cauliflower, pears (the pro-fruit person is correct, fruit is good for us), broccoli and blueberries. All raw and organic. There is also a small portion of fresh ground flax seeds and walnuts.

Fascinating, I know. Sadly, like OP, I continue to age badly. I do not glow with health or vitality. My skin is sallow and I have bags under my eyes. No nutrition or exercise regimen will get rid of these traits that I was born with. Genetics matter. Youth also matters. The non-genetically blessed often (not always) have a season, and then it ends. As the person above said, I was young and now I'm not. I was hot and now I'm not. It is what it is.

The other comment I agree with is the one on surgery for the purposes of not looking quite so hangdog etc. if there is a specific and aging problem. Super heavy, droopy eyelids for example. That can be dealt with and cause a clear improvement. Anyone trying, on the other hand, to erase all signs of aging will just end up looking freakish.

by Anonymousreply 179October 10, 2022 8:29 PM

Hey R127 - I have that exact same thing. Exactly as you describe. I assume the injectable you mention is Xolair? Do you have any comment on how it's working for you? I'm considering it because this shit has started happening from cold now as well (any exposed skin on a winter day will swell and turn into hives, which will spread everywhere and sometimes cause my throat to start closing) and has had a profound and negative impact on my life.

Are you taking propranolol for any reason, or have you ever? Just out of interest.

by Anonymousreply 180October 10, 2022 8:33 PM

R145 what a loon out of DL central casting!

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by Anonymousreply 181October 10, 2022 8:40 PM

R180 Yes, I'm taking Xolair (in addition to four antihistamines and an antileukotriene). It has helped. It stopped my hives outbreaks altogether, even in the summer heat. I still have an unpredictable exercise intolerance, but that's my primary lingering problem.

by Anonymousreply 182October 11, 2022 10:07 AM

R122, why do you think? Race has a bearing on how well people age. Ever heard of “black don’t crack”? Well it’s relevant because this is the inverse scenario you midwit.

by Anonymousreply 183October 11, 2022 10:30 AM

Others have said it already. Sunlight destroys the skin's collagen or some shit.

Avoid it like the plague. Maybe try regular facials.

by Anonymousreply 184October 11, 2022 11:03 AM

Is the OP still on this thread?

Still alive?

by Anonymousreply 185October 11, 2022 11:45 AM

R177- Contrary to popular opinion fruits contain more beneficial compounds than vegetable. The high fiber in most fruits prevents your blood sugar from soaring after you eat them unlike fruit juices- which have NO fiber. Fruits and vegetables are meant to be eaten whole not from a juicer where all of the fiber and many important nutrients are left behind.

by Anonymousreply 186October 11, 2022 12:24 PM

You can take metformin, the common diabetic drug. It's the only drug that exhibits aging-inhibiting factors that's currently readily available. It's not going stop you falling off that cliff, but it may delay it a little.

by Anonymousreply 187October 12, 2022 9:31 AM

Metformin

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by Anonymousreply 188October 12, 2022 3:03 PM

R15- I like your post. The funniest part is

Dems Da Rules

by Anonymousreply 189November 17, 2022 2:07 AM

R36- Not EVERYONE on datalounge is a bottom- most are but not everyone. I'm a top.

by Anonymousreply 190November 17, 2022 2:14 AM

R38- Gary Coleman

I liked him on Different Strokes

by Anonymousreply 191November 17, 2022 2:14 AM

R43- They're a lot of chemicals in sunscreens that are absorbed into your body. So many queens here on datalounge are obsessed with staying out of the sun and using sunscreen to look younger.

Don't drink, don't smoke and not taking drugs are a start plus eating a wide variety of plant foods- fruits, vegetables, nut, seeds and beans and only modest amounts of flesh food - mostly fish and some low fat or non fat dairy. That will go a long way towards aging well and looking younger plus talking a thirty minute walk everyday. Nothing more complicated than that.

by Anonymousreply 192November 17, 2022 2:19 AM

R192 I agree with you. I'm reading for interest about the GAPS diet which encourages lots of red meat and raw, full-fat butter and milk. Not for me, but interesting to read about this "ancestral eating" fad(?). Loving my blackout curtains since daylight saving started. That's 4+ hours of direct sun each day.

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by Anonymousreply 193November 17, 2022 2:32 AM

So much is genes. But it’s hard not to look around in CA and see all the well-tended older people with great hair, makeup, cars, clothes - but clearly sun damaged skin. Sun is damaging - period. And sunblock only prevents 50% or so of the damage. With that said - live your life. Worrying what you look like at 60 should not be a concern at 25.

by Anonymousreply 194November 17, 2022 3:03 AM

R194- Most gay men don't live in Florida , Arizona or California where they have to worry about constantly wearing sunscreen and staying out of the sun. I live just north of NYC. For the next five months I need to worry about not being outside enough not about being outside in the sun for too long.

by Anonymousreply 195November 17, 2022 3:21 AM

Many vegans look sickly and such pallor

by Anonymousreply 196November 18, 2022 2:02 AM

[quote]People on here are obsessed with sunscreen, keeping out of the sun and not drinking alcohol. Yet in other threads they knock back any kind of pills and medication they can get their hands on

You literally described my 65 year old female boss. She hats the sun, never tans, keeps the drapes closed in her fab high-rise apartment with an amazing view. Does not drink or smoke. Skin is flawless but so white and you see some of her vain through it. Looks great with makeup but without it she looks sickly. But man, she's on pills like you cant believe. Benzos, and about a 1/2 dozen other things I have not heard of. She's always half wasted on some kind of pills when I see her. But oh "she doesn't drink or do drugs". 🙄

by Anonymousreply 197November 18, 2022 4:29 AM

[quote] and you see some of her vain through it

It sure sounds like it!

by Anonymousreply 198November 18, 2022 10:18 AM

I am on a chubby side, so I have more fat on the face, but I also feel my face looks tired. I sarted doing face yoga, if course it doesn't do wonders, but it really helps with better circulation and fresher expression. But I am lazy bastard and not regular in it. Also hyaluron serum is makes skin look smoother.

by Anonymousreply 199November 18, 2022 11:30 AM

I have! Stay fit, lean, neat and clean, be kind, useful to others and with luck you will age gracefully and without too much fear (growing older is not easy, esp after 60).

by Anonymousreply 200November 18, 2022 12:30 PM

[quote] For what it’s worth, I’m in very good shape, a lifelong athlete, white, have all my hair.

If you are aged and you are not ill, then you have aged well quite literally and you should be grateful.

Why did you list "white" among your positive attributes, though?

by Anonymousreply 201November 18, 2022 12:36 PM

[quote]made the most of it in my 20s.

Drinking, drugs, not getting enough sleep, not enough hydration (now and back then), not eating right, not getting enough exercise - all age you very quickly.

Also, a daily sunscreen is your friend.

by Anonymousreply 202November 18, 2022 12:41 PM

R202- Absorbing all of the CHEMICALS in the sunscreen is NOT your friend.

by Anonymousreply 203November 18, 2022 12:45 PM

Daily "sunshine" is actually your friend. It can be minimal, just 10 minutes. It doesn't necessarily have to be direct, your skin absorbs sunlight in shade as well, which converts to Vitamin D.

by Anonymousreply 204November 18, 2022 3:07 PM

R25

That's not true for everyone. I'm a 65-year-old woman and when I was thinner people always thought I was younger than my sibling who's seven years younger. I still don't look my age although I'd like to lose some weight. Being overweight tends to age people. The other extreme -- looking anorexic -- isn't good either.

by Anonymousreply 205November 18, 2022 4:02 PM

R201

Many white people tend to look older when they age, especially if they were in the sun a lot without sunscreen or protective clothing.

by Anonymousreply 206November 18, 2022 4:04 PM

I have lots of advice to offer OP. But first I must be clear that I look fabulous and have intelligently preserved a youthful allure. I look 15 to 20 years younger than slops like you, of the same age. So just know that it's probably too late for you. Nothing can be done. And that some of us happy few are not pathetic and old looking. Life is a banquet! Are you ready for my tips and advice now?

by Anonymousreply 207November 18, 2022 4:23 PM

R205 it is true that having a chubby figure makes you look middle aged or matronly for women, but being skinny after 60 or even earlier makes women have the Clint Eastwood face and I don't mean young Clint. Not being fat, but having a few poubds extra and doing some exsercise to be firm is the best choice.

by Anonymousreply 208November 18, 2022 4:39 PM

[quote]I'm a 65-year-old woman and...I still don't look my age.

Who says that women don't fit right in on DL.

by Anonymousreply 209November 18, 2022 8:52 PM

😂☝🏼 .. have an orgasm daily and laugh often throughout the day . Let your soul Shine through and you will look and feel youthful for your age .

by Anonymousreply 210November 18, 2022 10:47 PM

"Wear sunscreen!" "Hydrate!" "Eat vegan!" and yet you 60 year old bitches who claim this keeps you youthful dont get laid either.

by Anonymousreply 211November 18, 2022 10:52 PM

I look old because I am old. It's natural.

by Anonymousreply 212November 18, 2022 10:56 PM

hanging around gay people can be very toxic.

by Anonymousreply 213November 19, 2022 12:12 AM

I put on these blue boxer-briefs last night to be sexy for my partner, but I immediately ripped them off because they made me feel like a god damn pear sausage. I don't know how I went from baby fat to anorexic (controlled and intentional) to skinny to this globular figure with the skinny-fat pear shape that I have now. Oh, yes I do—it was alcohol. Even liquor can make you fat, children. Just stay away.

by Anonymousreply 214November 19, 2022 12:16 AM

R209

It's true. Someone told me last week that I look 20 years younger. I was not fishing for compliments.

by Anonymousreply 215November 19, 2022 1:55 AM

R208

I said extremes are not good. But being thin -- not anorexic -- does not age everyone.

by Anonymousreply 216November 19, 2022 1:57 AM

I'm told all the time that I look 20 years older than I am!

It's really weird!

I am 23!

by Anonymousreply 217November 19, 2022 2:15 AM

I knew a guy R217 who looked 35 in high school. He just had an "old" face. But then I saw him 40 years later,and he looks 35 ! The weirdest thing Ive ever seen !

by Anonymousreply 218November 19, 2022 2:18 AM

R218 I was joking. I'm 44.

Imagine a 23 year old who looks 20 years younger...

by Anonymousreply 219November 19, 2022 2:20 AM

Don’t spend a lot of time looking in mirrors. Seriously this whole pursed lip constant selfie shit did not even exist 20+ years ago.

by Anonymousreply 220November 19, 2022 2:21 AM

You’re either 1) a woman. They age like milk in the sun. Or 2) not getting enough fillers/Botox

by Anonymousreply 221November 19, 2022 2:27 AM

I looked like my high school graduation photo until I was 40. No shit. Now I'm 60 and I look older than 60.

by Anonymousreply 222November 19, 2022 2:36 AM

R222 I'm so sorry you looked like a 40 year-old in high school. 🥺

by Anonymousreply 223November 19, 2022 2:43 AM

R215 doesn't appear to realize what an internet cliche they are.

by Anonymousreply 224November 19, 2022 3:23 AM

live agonisingly slow, die whenever, leave a dogshit ugly corpse

by Anonymousreply 225November 19, 2022 12:39 PM

R111 Still, no white I know wishes he was black. Every white, even the wokest, if he was honest would admit that being born white is one of the things in life you are grateful for, even if everything else is shit, you will never ever exchange you more delicate white skin for thicker black.

Blacks have skin of better quality, but they too lose freshness and become rougher with age and lose their charms too and they usually can not replace it with silver daddy sophisticated classy appeal that whites have.

by Anonymousreply 226November 19, 2022 1:16 PM

What if you're a white man with a tiny penis? You may well wish you were black.

by Anonymousreply 227November 19, 2022 1:42 PM

R218- James Dean was in the movie A Rebel Without A Cause. I believe he was a 24 year old playing a 16 year old who actually looked THIRTY FIVE years old.

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by Anonymousreply 228November 19, 2022 1:55 PM

R224

Sorry you can't handle the truth. Why would I lie? I'm never going to meet you.

by Anonymousreply 229November 19, 2022 2:42 PM

R226

Racist much?

by Anonymousreply 230November 19, 2022 2:44 PM

R230 well, if the truth is racist...

by Anonymousreply 231November 19, 2022 2:50 PM

R227 I believe that a white man with small dick would wish he was white man with big dick, there are plenty of them.

by Anonymousreply 232November 19, 2022 2:52 PM

And don't be such lying hypocrites, no straight man wishes he was gay, no young man wishes he was old and no doctor wishes he was a truck driver. Just the same, no white man wishes he was black.

by Anonymousreply 233November 19, 2022 3:13 PM

Anyone who thinks that an older Black man can't be elegant and sophisticated is ignorant and a racist.

by Anonymousreply 234November 19, 2022 3:17 PM

Many DL posters will say white people age like milk and never be called out for racism yet one poster says black men don't look elegant in old age and it's racist.

The lack of consistency is irritating.

by Anonymousreply 235November 19, 2022 3:23 PM

Tja.... we all age, but with age comes more genuine charm, warmth and a confidence one can only dream of when they are young, tight-skinned, and beautiful.

I stay religiously out of the sun, save for the early morning and late evenings in Summer, which seems to help a great deal. Other than that, we all must learn to rely less on looks and more on charm and intelligence.

by Anonymousreply 236November 19, 2022 3:32 PM

R235

I'm Black. I've never said that white people age like milk. It is an empirical fact, however, that most white people age more noticeably than Black because they don't have the benefit of extra melanin that protects against sun damage (which is not to say that Blacks can't suffer from sun damage, they can and do and should wear sunscreen).

Compare that to the remark basically saying that Blacks are rough and uncouth and that when they age they usually aren't able to be charming and sophisticated. That's ignorant, racist, bullshit.

Your inability to distinguish between the two statements is irritating, as is the tolerance of racism in the forum. It doesn't make you look edgy or whatever the hell you think is being projected.

by Anonymousreply 237November 19, 2022 4:05 PM

OP if you feel you've aged out already just do what other men do- pick on people more marginalized than yourself.

It's important to do so by harassing others for the same reason you feel cast aside. Project your feelings of insecurity about your sickly appearance accurately in order to deflect.

by Anonymousreply 238November 19, 2022 4:06 PM

R237

than Blacks

by Anonymousreply 239November 19, 2022 4:06 PM

R237 and it's an empirical fact that white people are more educated and intelligent than blacks, thus proving they have the charm and sophistication in old age that blacks do not. Feel better about your statement now?

by Anonymousreply 240November 19, 2022 4:33 PM

Why is LSA trolling this site?

by Anonymousreply 241November 19, 2022 5:02 PM

Lol @ "if you admit you'd never choose to be black rather than white you're racist."

Racist? Or a realist? Is someone admitting they'd never choose to be black making that choice because they see blackness as inherently inferior, or because they accept the reality of the society they live in, in which being black is a 'strike against' in life in a way being white isn't? It's the latter for me. I'm white. Aging pretty badly, too (British genes). But I'd never choose to be black for the simple reason of why the fuck would I CHOOSE to throw another hurdle in my own path? I'm actually openly glad I'm white. Like thank Christ for that, i got enough trouble already to add being a racial minority to the mix.

R240 is probably a racist, though. Sounds like one of them scientamific racists. They got the studies and everything. Black people is inherently dumb and anyone who says it has anything to do with poverty or racism is a wokey woke, have I got that right? R240?

by Anonymousreply 242November 19, 2022 7:22 PM

Jesus that's pathetic R242. On this site alone, I've been accused of misogyny, of being "anti-white", I've been called a man hater, a hetero worshipper, and a homophobe, because if one disagrees with what you say then they must be an "insert name".

Why is it okay to make insulting comments about white people but not black people? DL is a place where everyone should be allowed to hate equally yet there are posts insulting white men or women and it gets a free pass. The double standard is stupid.

by Anonymousreply 243November 19, 2022 7:52 PM

I assume, R243, that you're R240? I mean, why are you posting things like:

[quote]it's an empirical fact that white people are more educated and intelligent than blacks

and then acting all offended when you get called racist? Are you really, seriously saying you didn't expect just that to happen?

Anyway you'll note I (R242) said nothing at all about 'it's OK to make negative and racially-based comments about whites but not blacks' nor do I think it is. Racism is racism. If you believe Race X is inherently superior or inferior to Race Y, congrats, you're a racist. Even if Race X is "white." (also, though, it must be said again that what you said does seem to fit the definition we're working with here)

by Anonymousreply 244November 19, 2022 7:59 PM

R234- Mayor Dinkins may have been a LOUSY mayor but I think he could be accurately be described as an elegant and sophisticated older black man.

by Anonymousreply 245November 19, 2022 8:06 PM

God - I thought once the elections were over, the racist trolls would go away. But there are still a few drunk bitter angry old guys who will use DL to spew their deepest stupid thoughts.

by Anonymousreply 246November 21, 2022 5:36 PM

If you have your health, be glad for it. Just watched Michael J Fox accept the Jean Hersholt Award. He has all his hair, he doesn't even look old. But you would probably rather look how you look than have what he's got.

My parents both looked much younger than their ages, both smoked until their 40s or 50s, got a good deal of sun when they were younger, drank in moderation, and my mom had chronic insomnia. I didn't become "invisible" till about 53 or 54. Still a shock, in a way. A lot of it is genetics, but good luck.

by Anonymousreply 247November 21, 2022 5:46 PM

R246

Thank you. They are awful.

by Anonymousreply 248November 21, 2022 8:05 PM

Blacks have never posted on DL, for realsies.

by Anonymousreply 249November 21, 2022 9:21 PM

Did anyone think that a post entitled "I have not aged well" would not turn into a racist thread? LOL The vast majority of White men over 40 [DL's constituency] look like dog shit! Did you really not think they would resort to bashing Black and Brown men for universally looking better, healthier, more fit and YOUNGER? HAHAHA!

Age is the great equalizer. All the money, education, status, and (perceived) sophistication doesn't change the fact that when they look in the mirror, the Cryptkeeper is looking back at them! HAHAHA!

If you are a Black or Brown man just be GRATEFUL that if you take care of yourself you will look good well into old age. Don't sweat this bullshit. It is classic jealousy! 😂😂😂

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by Anonymousreply 250December 7, 2022 4:06 PM

I was ugly when I was young, so, nothing's really changed for me.

by Anonymousreply 251December 7, 2022 4:17 PM

It's ok OP. You are just a typical white man. It's ok. You are in good health and seem to have a good heart. You can't be forever young.

by Anonymousreply 252December 7, 2022 4:19 PM

Oil of Olay daily fixes this.

by Anonymousreply 253December 7, 2022 7:08 PM

R253- I prefer Camay- the beauty cleanser for your beautiful complexion.

by Anonymousreply 254December 7, 2022 8:58 PM

Jill Clayburgh 1967 Camay commercial- She's so young here.

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by Anonymousreply 255December 7, 2022 9:00 PM
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