Florida luggage thief will be very popular in prison

Oh my god

[quote] De Luca, an airline subcontractor, is currently facing two counts of grand theft

Of course, it was someone who worked for the airline.

Nice wide chest, not at all what I was expecting after seeing that dainty face.

You thirsty bitches. He can just say he is a woman and go to a female prison.

People who talk about prison rape in this fashion—gleeful, sadistic, titillated—reveal a deep, but hopefully not wide, psychological flaw.

I agree R5. Scary people. Makes you wonder if they were raped and have it normalized or are just sickos.

SICKIES!

Also, he can get it.

*sigh* This place used to be fun.

Fuck off, r8. I asked how many kids Joyce Dewitt had yanked out when she was hoing all over Hollywood on another thread. I’m no priss. I just think unfeigned excited expectation of sexual battery for some dumbass who was stealing pills out of luggage is weird.

What items of value would anyone from Destin, Florida have been carrying in their suitcases?

Can I top up his commissary account?

WOW a thread about an AWG

I bet you start the Kinzinger threads too OP

R10, true. I always thought stealing luggage seems like such an unprofitable endeavor. You would have to go through 10 suitcases full of underwear just to find one that might contain something of value.

[quote] I asked how many kids Joyce Dewitt had yanked out when she was hoing all over Hollywood on another thread. I’m no priss. I just think unfeigned excited expectation of sexual battery for some dumbass who was stealing pills out of luggage is weird.

An admitted toxic misogynist (and slut-shamer) is condemning me for my faith and belief in the American criminal justice system?! The NERVE!!!

He’s only going to prison if this was not his first offense.

You steal the expensive, show-off luggage.

[quote] I bet you start the Kinzinger threads too OP

Yuck! That's not me, gurl. I prefer my trade young, fresh and new.

Two bags going to Destin, FL had contents worth $17,000???

Jewelry, r18.

Destin omg cringe

Have his nudes leaked yet

I bet he has some nice thick thighs.

Dongful?

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

This thread has me microwaving a Tina’s Red Hot Beef Burrito in ecstasy!

OP/R14, there’s no toxic misogyny or shaming in my interest in Dewitt’s exploits, just curiosity. Your mind goes straight to rape when an attractive man gets arrested—you are strange and wrong.

[quote]You steal the expensive, show-off luggage.

In Destin, that would tend to be the Jessica Simpson line of luggage.

Who are these morons packing thousands of dollars worth of jewelry and CASH in their checked bags? They seemingly have the presence of mind to place an AirTag with the luggage to track it but not consider whether it might be a better idea to pack it in a purse or briefcase and use carry on??

Dumbass, fuck him.

[quote] —you are strange and wrong.

Aren't we all, Mary?

Maybe he was looking for meth.

It’s wrong!

SHOCKINGLY wrong!

The fey boi worried about the state of this criminal's hole 🕳️ after he goes to jail should send him some lube, for protection purposes.

Go on, then. The lube you send him could be the only thing that stands in the way of him having to plug his pooper for internal integrity, post incarceration.

[quote] Who are these morons packing thousands of dollars worth of jewelry and CASH in their checked bags?

Maybe. Don't forget that $17,000 figure is from the passengers on their damage claim forms. People usually greatly exaggerate the value of their lost luggage contents, and they always claim there was cash/jewels inside, figuring the luggage will never be found to prove them wrong (and even if it is, they can claim the cash was removed by the thief).

So that’s a yes then?

[quote] Florida luggage thief will be very popular in prison

Oh my! Those inmates will love him BECAUSE of the luggage.

Someone should steal that obnoxious moustache right off his face. Does he think he's James Garner in "Victor/Victoria"? Of course not. He likely doesn't even know that reference (and to be fair, Garner's wasn't quite so extreme). But it's awful, & needs to go.

Dont fuque around in Buttfuque Florida....he most certainly is going to be made to squeal like a pig......

Thief of hearts! ❤❤❤

[quote] I asked how many kids Joyce Dewitt had yanked out when she was hoing all over Hollywood on another thread. I’m no priss. I just think unfeigned excited expectation of sexual battery for some dumbass who was stealing pills out of luggage is weird.

Oh, so you have weird rules about what you think is inappropriate that you think you can define for others? Too bad you can't. Get over it.

R40 dislikes having a mirror held in front of his face.

His mustache is hawt! It’s very Breaker Morant.

was he able to search luggage first? If so, that's a good way to identify valuable luggage.

R43 is on the case!

Does he have nice hairy pits?

I bet he smells great.

There’s almost nothing worse than stealing someone else’s property, so it’s good to hope that he does suffer for it.

[quote]You would have to go through 10 suitcases full of underwear just to find one that might contain something of value.

Maybe underwear is his fetish and that's all he really wants.

The dream!

Of course someone would object to OP. God, I hate my fellow millennials and Gen Z.

Can someone explain this AirTag thing?

[quote] AirTag is designed to discourage unwanted tracking.

[quote]If someone else's AirTag finds its way into your stuff, your iPhone will notice it's traveling with you and send you an alert. After a while, if you still haven't found it, the AirTag will start playing a sound to let you know it's there.

Unwanted tracking? Huh?

R51, it’s like when you are curious about someone’s movements and instead of following them in person, you attach an AirTag to something they have, like a car or purse. Then you can conveniently track them online using an app, until Apple rats you out.

I'd do him but he comes with a lot of baggage.

I’d bend him over the arm of the sofa and split him open like ripe fruit. Oh yes I would. Bet he has a fresh taint area.

You better hurry and set up some conjugal visits, R54. He's going to go into the slammer with a 🕳️ like a knot in a balloon, but leave with it looking like one of your meemaw's knee-high nylons she bought in 1972 and refuses to throw away.

[quote] There’s almost nothing worse than stealing someone else’s property

I can think of a few.

This doesn’t seem right. I hope he has a good lawyer.

Thief of hearts! ❤❤❤

Maybe it was a drug smuggling operation and ding-dong grabbed the wrong suitcases.

[quote]*sigh* This place used to be fun.

It's the fraus.

I, for one, and for many, look forward to his nightly squeals.