Do Most Bisexual Guys Go Straight When They Get Older?

Jim Mattis just got married to a woman last weekend. First marriage at age 71.

So it’s bi now, straight later, gay now, trans later?

In my experience, NO!!!!!!!!! However they get married to women and have kids. Then they have male fuckbuddies.

So you’re saying they live as straight men, R3. The answer would be yes.

It makes sense to find a dumb woman who agrees to marry you and then produce offspring. You can always dump her later.

R3 In Mattis' case, I think he wanted to finally put an end to the gay legacy for history's sake. Hell, his best man was his trusted fuckbuddy Admiral Harward, instead of his own brother.

R4 no. Nowadays often the wife knows. They alive as Bi men. The fuckbuddies stay outside the family unit.

Tom Hardy.

It's all a show. They need that facade to impress their other perpetually 14-year old minded buddies with their hot blonde wife, with no tits and ass - who they fuck once or twice a year. Yet come running to what they really want and crying about how they haven't came in days or weeks, or however long it's been between fucking.

My old long-time hookup got married when I got sick a few years ago, after we started fucking in 2011 when I was 41 and he was 23. Gave me this whole gig about being hetero-homo-evolutionary, some nonsense like that. I told him he would be married in a few years, which he laughed off and said no way.

I got sick in 2016 and wasn't feeling like hooking much, sometimes not at all and he was married within six months.

He has been relentlessly trying to start things up since 2019, and I just am over it for the most part, as I found another who is also married... hotter than Madison Cawthorn, yet seems to be on his way to becoming an even bigger HOMO than me.

But I have been thinking about talking to my current guy about bringing him in now and then, since he fucks for hours, is uncut unlike my current guy and a filthy disgusting animal, which I love.

I think it’s deeper than that, R9. There’s something more that keeps these guys in the closet for life.

(1) These demographic behavioral patterns would almost certainly differ by generation in striking ways--most likely with younger bisexual men pairing off more frequently with male partners compared to bisexual men of older generations.

(2) You should look into social scientific research on the topic if you want any shred of substantial information on your question. Asking dataloungers their beliefs about behavioral trends in sexuality is going to provide you with next to nothing of substance. You're just going to get a ton of anecdotes.

Don't date bisexual men or even speak to them if you can avoid it.

Bisexual men tend to possess qualities that are irresistible to gay men, R12. So that’s not happening.

[QUOTE] Tom Hardy.

Exhibit A.

[...]

No, I think it increases once they get married.

There are toxic bi men who are shits to their wives. But there are also fun bi men who have open arrangements with their wives and are fun to have as fuckbuddies because they can be reliable and they are NOT clingy at all. They just want some sex and conversation. Blow off steam.

[quote]But there are also fun bi men who have open arrangements with their wives

Is this rare?

😂 Come on, R17. There’s no married bi men who have “open arrangements with their wives.” Maybe in Hollywood, but for the most part it’s behind their backs.

Its common but I wouldn't say 50% the norm. Just common enough. Its also common that bi married family men are duplicitous shits but these tend to be the much older variety and they are a dying breed.

R19 how would you know - since you don't fuck bis? Its pretty common where I've lived in Western Europe. In Egypt and the Middle East its more complicated. If the bi married man is wealthy, and the wife is educated and sophisticated as well, she knows. In Europe its less class based and I know working class bi married family men who are not duplicitous shits.

I had for 10 years a fuckbuddy who was bi, married, father, and a school custodian. His wife a vivacious feminine Spanish bombshell who doesn't care her (horse hung charming macho) husband fucks dudes on the side.

I’d need to ask the wife first.

They are perhaps likely to marry (if they do at all) due to the pressure (mostly internal) to conform. Otherwise there is nothing particularly different about them. They just happen to be turned in by both sexes. I don’t think they’re more likely to stray either. Sex outside a committed relationship is lust for what is new and different- perhaps more available to a bisexual but the same issue for everyone. That’s all.

[quote]It seems like gay experiences are just apart of sowing their wild oats, then it’s time to settle down in Frau Town and start a family.

Hey, it was good enough for us.

Stinkfish City, Frau Town, Vagina Village, Pussy Port, Cunt Dump, Twat Spot, Gash Neighborhood

Bisexuals are duplicitous by their very nature, Avoid them.

Yes, R9, I forgot to throw in the religion thing. Not much more complicated than what I said mixed with religious confusion.

Sorry I meant R10

[QUOTE]Bisexuals are duplicitous by their very nature, Avoid them.

Sometimes they’re so hot, you can’t resist.

Bisexuals are not duplicitous by their very nature- why oh why do some people find it necessary to demean others, fem, trans, black, Jewish, whatever. The person who made that statement is screwed up.

Well we’re talking about the closet cases who won’t even stick their necks out enough to identify as bi, R31. So they are duplicitous.

You don't stop being bisexual. They either become intensely faithful to their wives or cheat on the downlow with other men.

I imagine there's an appeal in having a housekeeper who takes care of everything.

[quote] Yet Another Thread Where Easily Duped Eldergays Whine About The Closet Cases Who Have Led Them On and Eventually Dumped Them For A Woman While Clinging To The Falsehood That If A Guy Can Fantasize About Justin Bieber or Brad Pitt Long Enough To Get Hard And Fuck A Woman, He Must Be A Bisexual

Yes OP

Homosexuals, like fish (aka str8 females) know that they will reach an age when they can no longer score sizemeat. At that point the homosexual will marry a fish and embrace a lesbian lifestyle.

I have two close friends that are bi men and both married women and neither ever dated a guy. One was, I’d say, more culturally gay than the other. The other one is clueless about pop culture and music and gay stuff in general. I’ve actually slept with both of them and even had a three way with the two of them (the culturally gay one and I had a lot of gay three ways in the 90s).

I was just at a gay bar today with the straighter of the two. He is definitely bi and, he’s divorced now, and he’s kinda a slut! I love him dearly (we’ve been friends for 30 years!) but he has a tendency to get drunk and start making out and disappearing with strangers (and he’s terrible about answering his phone) so it scares me when he vanishes.

But just tonight we were talking and he recently had a date with a woman and it didn’t go well and he said he’d never dated a guy but he’s been thinking about it more recently. And all I could tell him was there’s really no point. You can date a guy and if you’re the same size you can share clothes and shoes, but other than that, I think all the relationship stuff is pretty much the same whether you date a man or a woman, so if he thought it might be easier or more fun, or they d have more in common because they were both dudes, don’t count on it.

But the kicker: his ex-wife came out as a lesbian when they divorced and their 30 year old son is gay (and I’ve seen him on the apps 🙈).

Gayest. Family. Ever.

Why is it so hard for some gays to understand that there are men who prefer sex with women?

First of all, define bisexual guy — is it someone who identifies as bisexual? Or is it someone who experiences attraction to both sexes regardless of how they personally identify? Does it include a closeted gay man who marries a woman?

I think there are some guys that get married to women and then later acknowledge they’re bisexual but never act on it, or if they do, they’re part of a poly couple. People that come to mind are Jason Mraz and Brendon Urie and pop singer Max.

I think a lot of bi guys are only into hooking up with men but would never get romantically involved with a man. Charlie Sheen, as an example.

And there are some guys who want to be bi but they’re really not. David Archuleta, for example.

Avoid them, or suffer.

You looking at me?

R42 I remember him. His porn was so sexy and hot. How does his wife feel that millions of gay guys jacked off to her husband working a striptease, sucking dick and getting fucked by other guys?

[...]

[QUOTE]You looking at me?

There’s millions more where he came from.

Yes, when only the desperate Frauen would take them.

And it's a good thing. Where do you think the next batch of gaylings come from?

Are you bi, R47?

[QUOTE] Or is it someone who experiences attraction to both sexes regardless of how they personally identify?

That one, R40.

Absolutely OP. Speak to my publicist!

p.s. Know any hireable hot trade in LA? Asking for a friend.

Richard Madden and Francois Arnaud would beg to disagree!

When you get older you need your twinkie fix

My experience of bi's.

They're often EXTREMELY handsome. They have to be if they're going to be attractive to BOTH sexes. And they're attracted to very handsome men. It's a form of narcissism. They're really attracted to themselves.

People think bi's are somehow less hetero because they're bi. NO! They're as turned on by women as any hetero guy. And yes, they'll marry and live the hetero life. Can you blame them? And keep their homo side secret. It's amazing how they get away with it, but they do.

R38 it shows the gentic factors in the human genome that make people bisexis and gay-ees. Read article for more information.

My biggest dream is it to date a bisexual guy who had a vasectomy.

[quote] —Gore Vidal

I don't believe Gore Vidal was bisexual. I do, however, think that he was full of shit.

Evelyn Waugh notoriously fooled around with guys during his uni years, then married and had seven children with his wife.

R53 Porn fantasy.

R58's diverse sex and social life >

I think a lot of DLers have been burned by closeted guys who don't read as gay.

Guys who wanted a fuck buddy, not a boyfriend

Given AIDS and the reaction to it, it seems many guys between the ages of say 50 and 70 chose this path (living an ostensibly hetero life) as a gay life in the 80s just seemed way too hard.

And since most DLers are between the ages of 50 and 70....

R35, it’s not elderly gays whining- it’s more likely the younger guys who don’t know much-

Is Charlie Hunnam bisexual? Or are you just using his photo because he played gay as a teen?

They don't "go straight when they get older". They have what they really want, secretly. I have no problem with this, as long as they're not out there, blasting gay people and being hypocrites.

What do you mean when you say they have what they really want, R64?

They have a lifelong male friend with benefits - who they fuck around with every chance they get, while fucking the wife once or twice a year.

No they come out as gay.

If they're American and Christian, they either reject the church and come out or else they get married, spawn and suck dick on the down low, cry afterward, and vote for Republicans.

[quote]And it's a good thing. Where do you think the next batch of gaylings come from?

Straight people, mainly.

Freud says everyone is born bisexual

Freud said that?

Yes but look at where he is now

Yes OP but that dick though.

Freud also said, "Everyone's a coke addict. No? Just me?"

And then he died.

Over 90% of them are predominantly hetero anyways and become (or most likely pretend to be) 100% hetero once they marry a stinkfish and bear crotch fruit.

Well it’s odd. You’d think some would go in the other direction.

[QUOTE]They have a lifelong male friend with benefits - who they fuck around with every chance they get, while fucking the wife once or twice a year.

Who is Charlie’s lifelong friend?

Yes Op, because most of them are cowards who want to be accepted by society.

Questions

Of course!

When I’ve been to gay events and resorts it seems like 1/2 or more of the middle-aged and older men are divorced from women. Admittedly just an impression, but it’s not like there’s isn’t a two-way street going on here.

[QUOTE]Yes Op, because most of them are cowards who want to be accepted by society.

Wasn’t the point of the gay rights movement for us to be accepted by society? I don’t think it’s necessarily a cowardly thing to want acceptance.

It's not really the same R83. Women can be openly bisexual with no repercussions to their reputation. While men cannot be openly bisexual. Even if a woman pairs with a man, she'll talk about being bisexual. Yet you rarely hear bisexual men who are with women say they're bisexual. There's far more of a stigma towards male homosexuality and bisexuality in men is an extension of that. Which is why I don't like the term biphobia because it's really just homophobia.

Why would anyone set their hearts on men?

Because men are fucking awesome R85. Gay, straight, bi, confused, big cocks, bigger cocks - bring em on

I would say when I was younger, before gay marriage was legal, I figured that would be the course of my life. However, since gay marriage is now legal and gays having children isn't "crazy" anymore. I actually see myself more likely going for that with a guy. I am still sexually attracted to women, but the older I get it is as though I understand them less and less and guys more and more. And, I prefer my personal life to be as uncomplicated as possible.

Yes.

The gay lifestyle becomes an unhappy one with age. A preference for sex with other men is often just a manifestation of discomfort or a deep psychological fear of women. Stems from the gay boys unusual closeness with his mommy and some difficulty with being effeminate. Not so much of an issue anymore for even unevolved parents.

Naturally men who are capable of having sex with both men and women are more likely to choose a family life with the greater chance for happiness. Gay men who reduce everything to attraction to dick are young or very naive. It's fine to choose a gay lifestyle, but if you are fortunate enough to be fluent with both men AND women, it's a no brainer to build a better life with a woman who interests, attracts your and understands your history.

We don't all want children and some us like a hot ASS man as our favorite BITCH. My boy is my loyal toy and he better not break. In body or dedication. Cuz the ladies are lined up for me too.

To be clear, I am all in favour of buggery.

R89 What are you talking about? Gay men have no fear or dislike of women. We just don't want to fuck them. There's no reason to get all psychological about it. It's sexual attraction: pheromones, body odor, etc. It's primal. Straight and bisexual men don't choose a family life. They have sexual attraction to women, fuck them and get them pregnant and are socially and legally obligated to care for their child. There's men who do want a family but evolutionarily speaking. There's no drive for straight/bi men to want a family, just to impregnate as many women as they can.

Many straight people would be happier without kids and happier being single. Being socially programmed to have a nuclear family by a certain age is not naturally desiring it. So many don't want to admit they regret their marriage and having kids.

[quote]The gay lifestyle becomes an unhappy one with age.

And the heterosexual lifestyle is FILLED with happiness with age, hence all the mid life crises, alcoholism, pill addictions, affairs, divorces, and going crazy dealing with the kids.

"deep psychological fear of women"

Bitch, please

Life is not about the pursuit of pure happiness. Straight people understand this better the perpetually dissatisfied gays. A satisfied life takes a bit more sacrifice than most frightened gay men are willing to risk. Some have evolved. Evolved does not usually mean gay marriage or having surrogate babies. Don't take on what is not natural to you just because straight people do it. Gays should honor their sexual preference and lifestyle choice if they want others to respect it too.

Sex should be pursued and enjoyed. Gay sex is not a life. It's a lifestyle.

R95 you're a troll and you've never been funny. Nobody is laughing. Read The Onion for good satire.

Who said I was kidding? Does it hurt you that "gays" are an ever increasing minority? Very few men identify as homosexual anymore. We have options and choices and fluidity and are not driven by smothering mothers and distant fathers. In other words - It's no longer the psychological disorder or arrested sexual development that we see in most DL posters, R96.

Enjoy your lifestyle R96. I bet it let you down. Because it was based on nothing but chasing DICK and Joan Crawford movies. Disordered fools.

I was bi as a youth then homo later. I don't say gay cos I'm not gay: I can't be, one of my first gay fuck-buddies said I can't be gay unless I liked Judy; fuck off fxggxt.

R97 Wow homophobic much? I fall in love with men and want to be in a committed relationship with one. You think every gay is some slutty femme who is misogynistic? Far from it. You think the loud queens represent the whole gay community? You live online, buddy.

When I walk outside nobody thinks I'm gay because I'm not stereotypical. I come across as nerdy intellectual type with a dry sense of humor and many women develop feelings for me which is always awkward. I identify as gay because I'm attracted to men and fall in love with them.

If most young men aren't identifying as gay it's because of judgmental homophobes like you. Muriel apparently doesn't care about homophobia and let's scum like on here.

And incel like you is disordered.

Gay is so last century.

Homophobic bisexual men are embarrassing and I wish fellow gays would boycott these fools. It's why I don't fuck men on Grindr who are the DL who refuse to show me face pics or host. Stop bitching about biphobia when you are both homophobic and misogynistic.

As my former bf used to scream at me: "You are so fucking GAY !" He was in the Navy.

You're all wrong R99, But you may have your reactive opinion.

Who says "homophobic much" but a teenage girl or a effeminate lispy gay? WTF.

You're the one living online. And you're way too old for that language R99.

Identifying as gay is the correct way of putting it. About this we agree. Label yourself.

But most men who have sex or fall in love with other men don't necessarily limit themselves to a GAY identity. Many or us are bi or fluid or same sex attracted but not really interested in "gay" things.

Groups of gay men creep me the fuck out.....and that includes orgies and group sex. And gay bars and vacation destinations. YIKES.

Call me Homophobic. I'm a handsome Black muscular man in my thirties who lives with my boyfriend. He's a sexy bitch, too. We have "GAY" sex. Everyday.❤

[quote] Groups of gay men creep me the fuck out

I tend to agree but my husband is a flaming queen and has no problem with such groups.

R103 Thank you for the condescending and arrogant response. I'll be sure to learn from you. You big strong man. By the way I'm also black man and can't stand fellow black men who act like they're hot shit by being hypermasculine and thuggish. I'm attracted to articulate and soft spoken black educated men like lawyers, writers, doctors and teachers who understand real masculinity is not shaming others and simply doing what they have to do. So many black men like you need to grow the fuck up, you are insecure and put others down and mimic the white male who ultimately will always emasculate you because they have more money and status and don't need to posture and act brag about pointless shit. There's a reason many black women and black gays date outside their race.

You're welcome.

Like so many,I too hooked up with Bi guys in my youth.Thankfully I never was stupid enough to fall in love with one. Every single one I knew then are married with kids now. I have never once known or heard of a Bi guy that chose to be with a man. Thats just the way it is with Bi's and gay men should know that going in to it. Fun to play with,but dont catch no feelings cause you'll get yours hurt.

My husband was about to get married to a woman when he met me.

What a fucking delusional fairy tale.

That wasn't to you R8. The others trying basically say "the grass is always greener in hetero world".

WTF my keyboard is sticking... That wasn't to you, R108

The cathedral had been booked, and the archbishop too. I put an end to all that.

DLers really are clueless on this subject

Clue us in, R113.

[QUOTE] Like so many,I too hooked up with Bi guys in my youth.Thankfully I never was stupid enough to fall in love with one. Every single one I knew then are married with kids now. I have never once known or heard of a Bi guy that chose to be with a man.

I think I’m the only one.

Bump

Why?

I briefly dated a guy who claimed he was bisexual. He was a bit older and was separated from his wife. I knew the red flags, but he was so hot and I was dumb and in my 20s, so I tried it. He was so conflicted about his sexuality that he drank way too much. He had an amazing body but he could hardly get it up since he was so drunk all the time.

I ended it and haven’t seen him in years. Heard through a mutual friend that he went back to his wife. Recently I looked him up on Facebook and YIKES he looks terrible. Looks a good 15 years older than he is. He was buff and hunky when we were dating, but now looks like a little old man. I guess the alcohol and going back in the closet did a number on him.

Alcohol is literally poison. If you’re in the closet trying to drink the pain away, you’re literally killing yourself.

OP Removing my beauty mark = I no longer kiss boys.

Miss the beauty and the mark.

Most bisexual guys are hetero-amorous. And even if they aren't, they are drawn to the much easier, more protected and more privileged life of a relationship/family set-up with a woman. So stay away for your own good.

Yeah, they are losers just like the ones in Brokeback.

Grant Hart was bi. He married a woman in '17. He died a few months later. Is that Green Day guy bi? He is married to a woman. What about Kurt Cobain and Pete Townshend? They were/are married to women.

R119 We are all killing ourselves. In a one way or another.

Nonsense, R125. Plenty of people are living happy, carefree lives devoid of substance abuse.

Find out what they like, and how they like it. And make it for them just that way!

R126 Okay, Ian MacKaye

It was probably cancerous, R120.

When one can no longer put one's ankles behind one's ears it's time to settle for gash.

I couldn’t forget my trip to Thailand. I went to Koh Phangan for a few days. Met a group of first generation Polish guys from the UK. Their parents moved to the UK when they were younger.

They were traveling together, all between 18-21. Macho, fun, hot as hell, and tradies back home. I blew one of the four after a night partying on the beach. Another night, I went on a solo walk with another one from their group while we enjoyed some beer and conversation. Got as close as jerking him off a bit before he backed out due to gilt over cheating on his girlfriend. I know if given another chance, he would have gone further.

Checking their Instagrams, these guys seem to live a heteronormative lifestyle. I wonder if they are still bi-curious. But it makes me think about how much being bisexual can just be about opportunity.

These guys were away from prying eyes when we got together. No risk, great reward. But in the end, the one I hooked up with ended up with a pretty girl from Minnesota that he stuck with for the final 2 days all of us were on the island.

I know I felt sort of bad being a dirty secrete while that beautiful woman got to have him in public.

Great story, R131. And you weren’t the only guy who had him in public.

go to r/Bisexualmen and read endless posts from and about heteroromantic biseuxals who aren't even attracted to men, just their penises, and the revulsion they feel when pondering anything beyond getting gagged and railed by cock. Many (most?) bisexual men appear to just be straight guys with an acknowledged penis kink.

↓

This guy's wife later appeared on another episode of OPL and talked about how they had entered the Stag/Vixen lifestyle.

Yes they do. The world of heterosexual is a sick and boring life. Why date and fuck someone who is constantly whining and pining for pussy? You'd have much better luck trying to domesticate a wolf as a pet.

My father had a lover when he met my Mom. She told me so, and my mothers best friend since childhood went to bars with him. In the 60’s. Women know and either reconcile or choose to ignore and Bi man’s nature.

So your one little anecdote proves that all women with bi men know that their husbands go both ways, R135?

The perception is that bi men are just pulling off the road on their way to Gaytown, but it’s wrong. The vast majority of bi men are in the closet and the false perception is informed by the sliver of out bi men (I read a stat that estimated only 12% of bi men are out) who, for myriad reasons are probably more likely to be perceived as gay. The rest of them exist completely in the shadows. Most don’t have a “holistic” attraction to men. No emotional or romantic attraction. Only physical and even that often doesn’t extend beyond the penis. Not caring what a guy (or trans) looks like, only that a penis is present, is very common.

“ It makes sense to find a dumb woman…”

That’s redundant, R5.

Charlie Hunnam was bellissimo. Recall in his younger days their was Antinous & Hadrian project being kicked around with Charlie as Antinous and Liam Nesson as Hadrian. That would have been something to see.

I think if you can go both ways when you're younger you may take a long time to figure out your preference, if you have one. Then you do tend to go one way or another - but not completely. You just can't deal with the exhaustion of being bisexual forever.

R137

It’s hard to generalize about everyone but I have interviewed a lot of men who claimed no attraction at all to other men. Not in a physical or romantic way. But they loved sex.

Some of these guys would have sex with the wife, a trip to the glory hold at lunch time for a quick BJ, and then maybe sex with a GF or female pickup. Or a stop at Pickle park on the way home.

Overly sexed is one way to look at it. Sex addict is another.

But there were also sex addict out gay men as well. Some hitting the GH, park, truck stop, xrated theater, virtually every day of the year. Work and Cruise Work and Cruise Work and Cruise….

Both groups above could easily have 300+ sex partners in a year.

Street walkers or pros were the only woman I ever interviewed who had numbers anywhere near that.

These days he could play Hadrian

^Beautiful Bisexual indeed.

Ask Andrew Gillum, whose wife knew he was bi when they married.

R141 Thanks for your expertise.

I'm surprised it wouldn't be the opposite way. Who the fuck wants to talk to a woman all the time

[QUOTE] Who the fuck wants to talk to a woman all the time

People who love their moms? 😅