I bought a house and need a regular handyman. I want to hire a hot buff dude, but Angie’s List and Thumbtack handymen for hire don’t usually have full body pics. More than one person has suggested patrolling the lots of Home Depot and Lowes for hotties looking for work. I thought of just asking new folks on Nextdoor App if they can recommend a handyman that is hot and hunky.
You watch too much porn, OP. I suppose a fatty like you needs some sexual outlet.
by Anonymous | reply 1 | June 18, 2022 6:32 PM |
Oh honey, no one believes you bought a house.
by Anonymous | reply 2 | June 18, 2022 6:34 PM |
I remember back in the 90s that there were ads in the local Chicago gay paper for cleaning guys that would do it shirtless. But I always assumed they weren't really cleaning.
by Anonymous | reply 3 | June 18, 2022 6:46 PM |
R3, I doubt they were hot or my type. The ones I’ve seen haven’t been my type
by Anonymous | reply 4 | June 18, 2022 6:49 PM |
All you do is go into a dark go-go bar and ask if anyone does carpentry drag.
Then, buy a pile of wood, some tractor tires, a jumpsuit, and some black greasepaint.
by Anonymous | reply 5 | June 18, 2022 7:11 PM |
There used to be a "Pink Pages" publication where I live - yes I am old enough to understand the Yellow Pages reference.
All of the advertisers were gay businesses and yes, there were gay landscapers, gay contractors, gay handymen. Of course, some companies were simply gay-owned (not all employees were gay), others were gay, gay, gay.
Doubt Pink Pages exists now... it would have to include the T, the b, the Q, the BLT with mayo on wheat.
by Anonymous | reply 6 | June 18, 2022 7:28 PM |
OP, maybe just jerk off, or (more of a challenge) find a reasonably hot guy to have sex with. Craigslist is gone, but there's now one called DoubleList, which is kind of lame compared with the old Craigslist. I did just see an ad on DoubleList, though, posted by a guy who will come to your house and wash your car wearing only a thong. But he says he's 60!, so I don't know.
by Anonymous | reply 7 | June 18, 2022 7:37 PM |
Whoever you end up hiring, they might sue for sexual harassment.
by Anonymous | reply 8 | June 18, 2022 8:20 PM |
I would just like a contractor that shows up and finishes the job.
by Anonymous | reply 9 | June 18, 2022 9:02 PM |
The Home Depot parking lot has some hot buff Latin men waiting to find a job
by Anonymous | reply 10 | June 18, 2022 10:01 PM |
Also, post ad for handyman at gyms and black barber shots. Talk about hotties
by Anonymous | reply 11 | June 18, 2022 10:33 PM |
The gym is a great place to seek hot help
by Anonymous | reply 13 | June 19, 2022 1:01 PM |
R12 - Those are whores, darling. Simply cash-only whores.
by Anonymous | reply 14 | June 19, 2022 1:29 PM |
R6 - I remember the pink pages! I wish there was a better organized marketing promoting gay-owned business for gay clients to use. I'd rather spend my money on a gay plumber, landscaper, attorney, or doctor if I had the choice. And no, it has nothing to do with sexual fantasies, it's about supporting our own.
by Anonymous | reply 15 | June 19, 2022 1:32 PM |
Check nifty.org. That's where those type of hunky handymen hang out.
by Anonymous | reply 16 | June 19, 2022 1:56 PM |
Maybe Facebook, OP?
by Anonymous | reply 17 | June 19, 2022 1:58 PM |
R12 to me that would suck the fun/sexiness right out of it.
by Anonymous | reply 18 | June 19, 2022 1:59 PM |
R10 what part of the parking lot do they congregate in?
by Anonymous | reply 19 | June 19, 2022 2:00 PM |
R9 - I’d add to that, “and who knows what they’re doing”.
by Anonymous | reply 20 | June 19, 2022 2:01 PM |
Why r18? People hire movers who market themselves as “hunks” all the time
by Anonymous | reply 21 | June 19, 2022 2:32 PM |
R19, usually at the edge of the parking lot
by Anonymous | reply 22 | June 19, 2022 2:33 PM |
R1 covered it. OP is sad and fat.
by Anonymous | reply 23 | June 19, 2022 2:35 PM |
I actually know a guy that looks like the man in the OP. He does landscaping and some carpentry and works for himself.
He’s not gay. He’s got two kids by two different women, a criminal record, and a few tattoos (including CWB on his bicep — I’ll let you guess what it means). But he’s tall and muscular. I remember asking him what he does to work out and he said nothing really. He said he does pull ups every night before bed and push ups every morning. Everything else is from boxing and working.
by Anonymous | reply 24 | June 19, 2022 2:50 PM |
To get ripped like that, you have to have incredible genes and diet if you don’t officially work out
by Anonymous | reply 25 | June 19, 2022 3:27 PM |
Op, I don’t think the parking lot is where you’ll find the type of guy you’re looking for.
by Anonymous | reply 26 | June 19, 2022 3:43 PM |
It depends on where you live. My Lowes and Home Depot has some hot Dominicans lurking who clearly lift weights
by Anonymous | reply 27 | June 19, 2022 3:55 PM |
Is that guy ever going to get that chainsaw started? 🙄
by Anonymous | reply 28 | June 19, 2022 5:48 PM |
Whew gurl, is it already time for our semi-annual Home Depot day laborer stories thread? My the time goes by so quickly!
by Anonymous | reply 29 | June 19, 2022 5:55 PM |
R24
"He’s got two kids by two different women, a criminal record, and a few tattoos (including CWB on his bicep — I’ll let you guess what it means)."
Canadian Western Bank?
by Anonymous | reply 31 | July 4, 2022 8:00 PM |
They're all either on HGTV, or gay porn, sadly.
by Anonymous | reply 32 | July 4, 2022 8:11 PM |
R30, he's cute as Hell!
by Anonymous | reply 33 | July 4, 2022 8:12 PM |
Some people are just lucky R25 . I knew this guy,who at 19 never touched a weight yet was incredibly muscular and ripped. With a dick like a steel bar ! but I digress. I didnt see him again for 40 years,then ran into him again. Same hot,muscular body. The mug looked like a shrunken apple doll,but I bet that dick still got rock hard.
by Anonymous | reply 34 | July 4, 2022 8:14 PM |
[quote]including CWB on his bicep
Clowns without Borders?
Cums While Baking?
Creative White Bread?
by Anonymous | reply 35 | July 4, 2022 8:15 PM |
Crazy White Boys R35 ! Usually on the really hot white trash studs .Ex cons .
by Anonymous | reply 36 | July 4, 2022 8:18 PM |
For yard work, just wander the streets until you see something you like. If it turns out to be the homeowner or his family, you’ll have to offer so much money that they can’t say no.
by Anonymous | reply 37 | July 4, 2022 8:21 PM |
This guy is exceptional
by Anonymous | reply 38 | July 12, 2022 12:26 PM |
For stuff that actually requires a real handyman, I'd rather have competent than hot.
For stuff like yard work or simple tasks that don't actually require skills, occasional hot (and expensive) is fine.
by Anonymous | reply 39 | July 12, 2022 12:29 PM |
Well, if it’s that complicated, I need a professional expert, not a handyman
by Anonymous | reply 40 | July 12, 2022 1:16 PM |
Even professional experts can be nude though
by Anonymous | reply 41 | July 13, 2022 12:08 PM |
He’s got amazing tits
by Anonymous | reply 43 | July 14, 2022 12:54 PM |
Indeed
by Anonymous | reply 44 | July 14, 2022 2:33 PM |
Yes, they are TikTok superstars
by Anonymous | reply 47 | July 14, 2022 6:38 PM |
Gay-bate extreme
by Anonymous | reply 48 | July 15, 2022 12:30 PM |
Let's say you could find a hot, hunky handyman. He would size you up in an instant, quote you an hourly rate for a 2-hour job that he ultimately stretches out to 10 days, always finding something "unexpected" or some complication that would take "a few more days" to complete. Then he'd find ways to bring in his plumber friend, then an electrician buddy, and all of them would understand that they didn't really need to do anything - just look busy whenever you showed up - to make a few hundred bucks because "this stupid fag doesn't know anything". And all the while he would tease you and lead you on but never deliver the goods. Two weeks later, your project is still not finished - in fact, it's in worse shape that when he started - and you're out a few thousand bucks. You realize your error in judgement and try to find a legit contractor to fix the mess. You forget about the hunky, crooked contractor. But six months later when his wife kicks his drunk ass out for screwing the bimbo cashier from Home Depot, he comes back to your place, tries to extort some money from you and when that fails, bashes your head in with that bad plaster statue you insist on keeping in the foyer, then hides your body in the crawl space. Your friends think that you really did run off to Mexico with that hunky handyman you told them had the hots for you. Your body isn't found until the bank starts foreclosing on the house. All because you didn't use that contractor your aunt recommended. The end.
by Anonymous | reply 49 | July 15, 2022 2:21 PM |
I love Ari Smejkal, the carpenter on HGTV's [italic]Windy City Rehab.[/italic]
by Anonymous | reply 51 | July 15, 2022 3:26 PM |
He’s a sweetie
by Anonymous | reply 52 | July 17, 2022 1:44 PM |
Bump
by Anonymous | reply 53 | July 17, 2022 1:59 PM |
Honey pie
by Anonymous | reply 54 | July 17, 2022 7:18 PM |
Once, I had just parked in the Home Depot lot and saw a hot guy get out of his work truck. It had his name/company name/phone number on the side. You may want to try that and think of "projects" around the house....
by Anonymous | reply 55 | July 17, 2022 7:33 PM |
Bumpn
by Anonymous | reply 56 | July 25, 2022 9:58 PM |
As soon as you proposition him I hope he sues your ass for sexual harassment. If you want an escort or sex worker just go that route.
by Anonymous | reply 57 | July 25, 2022 10:12 PM |
r57 is the reason that DL is a tiresome bore of a site now
by Anonymous | reply 58 | July 26, 2022 11:59 AM |
R58, Lies. I'm saying. We all know what the OP wants. Why beat around the bush. No hunk intended.
by Anonymous | reply 59 | July 26, 2022 2:23 PM |
R49, you should submit that story to Nifty. 😉
by Anonymous | reply 60 | July 26, 2022 5:41 PM |
R49, your post reminds me of the old DL. Good job.
by Anonymous | reply 61 | July 26, 2022 7:39 PM |
Lesbians are the better route to go...
if you squint your eyes, you can still fantasize.
by Anonymous | reply 63 | July 29, 2022 1:09 AM |
The OP pic has gyno.
by Anonymous | reply 64 | July 29, 2022 1:15 AM |
OP, you need to watch this.
It details the pros and cons of instantly hiring Handymen and Contractors.
by Anonymous | reply 66 | August 15, 2022 1:26 AM |
I have a new hot Latin handyman. Very friendly. Very
by Anonymous | reply 67 | August 15, 2022 1:29 AM |
Sexy and sweet
by Anonymous | reply 68 | August 15, 2022 6:44 AM |
Nice r67. Will you make a move?
by Anonymous | reply 69 | August 15, 2022 2:10 PM |
I never make the initial move on straight identified guys. I follow their lead
by Anonymous | reply 70 | August 15, 2022 11:04 PM |
I follow them to the bedroom
by Anonymous | reply 71 | August 16, 2022 6:47 AM |
Bump
by Anonymous | reply 72 | August 16, 2022 11:06 AM |
RUMP
by Anonymous | reply 73 | August 18, 2022 6:19 AM |
[quote]I never make the initial move on straight identified guys. I follow their lead
As one does, when one is a refined Southern Lady of good breeding...
by Anonymous | reply 74 | August 18, 2022 7:05 AM |
Dear Penthouse Forum…
by Anonymous | reply 75 | August 18, 2022 7:16 AM |
I love black and Latin handymen
by Anonymous | reply 76 | August 18, 2022 7:32 AM |
You cannot specifically hire hot tradesmen, you have to be pleasantly surprised when one turns up who is actually hot - that's just how it works - and then you present hole and see what happens.
by Anonymous | reply 77 | August 18, 2022 9:21 AM |
If anyone knows breeding, it would be Senatrice.
by Anonymous | reply 78 | August 18, 2022 11:49 AM |
You can peruse their pics on Next Door or Thumbtack
by Anonymous | reply 79 | August 18, 2022 12:40 PM |
You can suck them off after the shift
by Anonymous | reply 80 | August 19, 2022 1:18 PM |
The HandyMan
The HandyMan can
The HandyMan can cause
He mixes it with love
And makes the world taste good
by Anonymous | reply 81 | August 19, 2022 1:22 PM |
Huh 🤔
by Anonymous | reply 82 | August 19, 2022 1:24 PM |
W&W, r81.
by Anonymous | reply 83 | August 19, 2022 1:37 PM |
I've always had good experiences with the Telephone Men:
Hey, baby, I'm your telephone man
You just show me where you want it
And I'll put it where I can
I can put it in the bedroom
I can put it in the hall
I can put it in the bathroom
I can hang it on the wall
You can have it with the buzz
You can have it with the ring
And if you really want it
You can have a ding-a-ling
Because-a hey baby
I'm your telephone man
by Anonymous | reply 86 | August 19, 2022 10:56 PM |
I've had hot construction workers in my house for the past two months working on various projects. One main guy, another guy who helps out sometimes, and a couple of others from time to tome.
Of course I can't not notice how hot they are but it's fun to have them around. They are very professional and friendly. I'm much older, they're straight and respectful. It's fun when more than one are working because I can eavesdrop on their conversations. They joke around, talk about their trucks, the ladies, and fishing. They laugh a lot and are so upbeat and happy. They leave their shirts on and for the most part I leave so I can get out of their way. Never in a million years would I let them know I think they're hot. I keep it professional, too. Also, at the price I'm paying for these projects I'll be happy when the work is done.
by Anonymous | reply 87 | August 19, 2022 11:14 PM |
R87 - You silly goose. Crank up the heat and install cameras. You're sitting on a goldmine.
by Anonymous | reply 88 | August 20, 2022 2:14 PM |
I want a picture before I hire a handyman
by Anonymous | reply 89 | August 20, 2022 2:20 PM |
Sexy as fuck
by Anonymous | reply 91 | August 27, 2022 12:44 PM |
R90 - He looks like he smells bad.
by Anonymous | reply 92 | August 27, 2022 2:34 PM |
he looks like he smells good to me
by Anonymous | reply 93 | August 27, 2022 3:50 PM |
Me too R93!!
by Anonymous | reply 94 | August 27, 2022 3:59 PM |
I fuck my gardener.
He's married and apparently straightish, but cannot stay away from a top daddy who treats him like a boy who needs attention.
At first it seemed weird, but....
by Anonymous | reply 95 | August 27, 2022 4:11 PM |
Me three
by Anonymous | reply 96 | August 27, 2022 4:11 PM |
Bless you, OP. Seeing that gif when scrolling Recent is always a treat.
by Anonymous | reply 99 | September 4, 2022 4:07 AM |
^ LPSG says he's a gay-baiter.
by Anonymous | reply 103 | September 12, 2022 12:15 AM |
R103 - They're *all* gay-baiters. But they're muscular and hot and we're OK with it.
by Anonymous | reply 104 | September 12, 2022 2:54 PM |
Bump
by Anonymous | reply 105 | September 12, 2022 2:55 PM |
Surprising no one, Cavill is at a total lost with what to do with a box.
by Anonymous | reply 106 | September 12, 2022 10:37 PM |
YUM! Narcissistic sociopathy... so hot!
by Anonymous | reply 107 | September 12, 2022 10:39 PM |
r102, seems like a lot of these guys play a ton of video games.
by Anonymous | reply 112 | October 14, 2022 1:58 PM |
This is the plot of the poignant Mischa Barton/Sam Rockwell drama LAWN DOGS.
by Anonymous | reply 115 | November 20, 2022 10:24 PM |
Hire an escort to role play your fantasy for you. Bonus: he'll actually fuck you too!
by Anonymous | reply 116 | November 20, 2022 10:34 PM |
Naw I’m not into that
by Anonymous | reply 117 | November 20, 2022 10:38 PM |
Yeah, hire someone who doesn't know how to do the job, because they are hot.
by Anonymous | reply 119 | December 4, 2022 2:35 PM |
I hire dudes who are hot and competent.
by Anonymous | reply 120 | December 4, 2022 2:46 PM |
I've actually thought about hiring someone who's nice looking or muscular etc for similar tasks. But there's just such a shortage of anyone doing anything.
In my area, all the decent contractors are booked years in advance. There's lots of handymen who offer their services but they all badly half ass anything they do, and why pay someone else for that when you can do that yourself for free?
The irony....worked a long time to afford a house and the help I need to make it nicer but absolutely no one in my time zone is available. LMAO *sobs*
by Anonymous | reply 121 | December 4, 2022 7:20 PM |