The LIES guys tell on the APPS

They are not lies. The are enhancements.

Lol. I don’t why black guys do that, especially when you have dark skin and kinky hair. It screams self hate, which is a massive turn off.

R2 I agree 100%! Some black eyes are so cute. Own it and be proud.

R3 Black guys .. not black eyes lol

"Friendly and outgoing - no hangups here. Like guys from all walks of life as long as they take care of themselves. My interests include meeting new people, craft whiskey and beach walks with my dog"

Translation:

"Prisspot scene queen trying to butch it up and seem like a regular guy even though my mental health is currently less stable than Ukrainian borders. Will flake on you twice and then pretend like we never spoke when accidentally running into you at Trader Joe's."

R5 lmfao! Spot on!

Their weight ex. 205 = 240

Here's a recent picture of me = it was taken 10 years and 20 pounds ago

Im cuddly = obese shut in

Would it not be easier to list the truths guys tell on apps? Here, I'll go:

Straight acting , completely masculine, seeking same only = screaming queen looking for a soul sistuh to bump pussies.

.

R11 Had this happen way too many times to count

I'm bi = totally gay

Love sports, the outdoors, fishing, my truck, rugged guys, camping etc. etc..

Yawn! I still don’t wanna fuck you

Im a total top - ya sure

I'm not on Apps - but would I lie for sex? You bet I would.

It's all well and good until SwimJock8+ shows up and he's two tons of bear fun, R16

Whenever men have something like "be kind to one another" on their profiles, you can guarantee that guy is a douche.

R10 Uh excuse me sir you forgot to list the cardinal truth:

"No fems no fats no Azns"

The most important stuff is what they leave out.

No age = he’s over 50 (and ashamed of it)

No shirtless pic = he’s either fat or scrawny

Missing height and/or weight = ditto

As a true 5'10" with a preference for taller guys it's always amazing how brazenly men will lie about their height on apps.

Post a pic with a cap on = bald headed

The issue with apps. I will forever be grateful I came of age and met my husband before apps took over. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to meet someone now.

Same r23.

Their perceived gender! 🤬

I’m 57. I list my real age. I like guys around my age, give or take a few years. It seems the other similarly aged guys have shaved 20 years off their listed age. Ditto some “40 year olds.” Like, you’re at least 70, or you’ve lead the roughest life imaginable. Teeth and skin hold no secrets. I asked one guy I’d been chatting with what his real age was. He insisted he was 54. His baked bean teeth and decrepit hands suggested otherwise.

R26 It’s sad that people are in total denial. I’m 37 & cool with getting older. Jeez people.

there's a guy near me who's been 45 for about 5 years

R5 LMAO! Vicious but true.

BLM Trans lives matter

You don't have to be trans or black to support black people and trans people. How is that a lie?

Lighten up. Its called sarcasm.

As in they 1) probably don’t really care and/or 2) are just doing performative virtue signalling.

Republicans think anyone who doesn't share their hateful views is virtue signaling

No. People who actually care about human rights and you know, DO something about it, roll their eyes at people who yes “virtue signal” like that whether on a Grindr profile or a corporate logo.

"Virtue signaling" is a Republican talking point. People who actually care about human rights aren't voting GOP

My experience is guys with blank profiles especially in University towns are usually the hottest. If they contact you it’s because they’re comfortable sending you a pic and wanna hook up.

[...]

When these lies and deceptions start to be a problem its a sign that you have little value left on the meat market (if you ever had any). Young healthy optimistic dynamic good-looking people find each other easily with very little bullshit.

R38 Exactly however if you live in the middle of nowhere your options are limited.

There is not ideal solution for that R39.

If you can't get laid on an ap, time to leave the ap. Sad. Find a dating ap or get out in society and try to meet people in real life. Aps encourage a passivity in old folks. They cling to their delusions and falsehoods for 10 15 20 years, unfucked, unloved, unhappy.

R40 Wow couldn’t have said it better myself. I joined as many clubs & teams as I could when I moved to Columbus. I met a ton of people. I’m also very extroverted so I might be a little bit easier for folks like me. I think people get stuck in a loop. It’s definitely sad when you say guys in their 50s cruising the apps.

That's a blanket statement. Daddies in their 50s can do well on aps so that's not sad. I have former fuckbuddies now in their 50s and they still have value on the meat market. They are handsome fit tops with big meat. So good for them. But they lie about their age. 56 is 48 forever. The guys who hook up with them, they aren't stupid. They just go with the role play because the guy is mature is hung and will give them a dick down.

One of the original hook-up sites, A4A, doesn't update your age automatically. I have to remember to update my profile so as not to be like some of the guys I've seen there with the same "recent" picture and age 34 for the last 25 years. I don't really care how old someone is -if they're hot, they're hot. You can be 19 and totally unappealing, or 70 and rocking muscles that anyone would envy. Bottom line: your profile is how you "sell" yourself on the meat market. If you ever expect to meet up with anyone it had better be pretty accurate, or you'll be left high and dry.

[quote]or you’ve lead the roughest life imaginable.

Almost as rough as not knowing the difference between lead and led.

HOT daddies can do well....but no one wants to hook up with a chubby 60-year-old bottom

I had a friend that aged like Ralph Macchio. He looked 29 at 45. Seriously this guy fucked every guy 18-23 well into his late 40s.

Not a lie, but a turnoff. Guys who msg you at some point when you’re away from the app then the second you come back on msg you again as you are reading their message. Creeps me the hell out, even if they are hot.

R47 yes creepy. 9/10 they are unemployed.

r23

I have never understood why some guys omit the HIV status section on Grindr if they are truly negative. Laziness?

R50 They think they’re being clever and sneaky when we all know their poz.

Or, if they are young, R50 and R51, it is often that they just don't see HIV as a big deal. They have no concept of HIV/AIDS epidemic...

R51 Their poz what? Their poz who?

I don’t list my status (I’m negative and on PrEP) because I’m old and still think it’s something you’re supposed to talk about, not just have as a checkbox. But now I wonder if everyone assumes I’m positive. I don’t actually care what most guys on the apps think about my status, and sometimes it comes up in chats, and I’ll tell them I’m negative and on PrEP. I’d feel weird changing it at this point-like it would seem I’m just there for a quick hookup (which sometimes I am, but sometimes I just like talking to strangers).

Not a lie, but I swear at least 4 guys that have chatted me up recently on scruff were either call center employees posting from a script or that google AI that became sentient. Just off in some way, like all-American guy-next-doorsy types but English isn’t their first language or they were just recently activated chatbots. I would have said 5, but after chatting with one guy for a while he asked me if it was ok that he was Norwegian and still had an accent. Which I thought was kinda cute actually. I don’t know if other guys have told him Norway is a BIG turn off or what, but it’s certainly ok with me.

I have a several months virtual boyfriend in Venezuela. He's so young and lovely and sweet. I flew him to visit me in May. But his plane had a Karen incident and was turned around in flight back to Caracas. 😢 After he helps his family with the harvest he's coming back. I'm helping them build a vegetable stand. It's the least I can do. He knows my real age 73 (look 57) and poz status and he he likes mature men. I buy his PREP for him because its so expensive in Venezuela.

What was that new york er cartoon back when where a dog says to another, On the internet noone knows you're a dog

Agreed re guys lying about their ethnicity. It seems silly when they have photos.

I've seen a few clearly mixed guys say they're white. Why be ashamed of it? Would you really wanna go with a guy who says 'whites only' anyway?

R57 I’ve had dark skin black guys reach out to me with mixed in their profile. Like wtf! You look stupid

I'm the exact opposite I actually undersell myself in my profile, I'd rather the guy be pleasantly surprised than disappointed.

Here’s one I get from time to time, when see a previous hookup who’s back on the app with a new profile, but the same pictures:

Me: “Hey, remember back in June, we met up at _____ and, did _____ and _____?”

Them: “Sorry Man, you must have me confused with someone else. We’ve never met.”

Grindr amnesia, I call it.

R54, sorry but that is a weird mentality to have about listing hiv status (which is fundamentally an “either / or” thing) on a Grindr profile - if you are indeed neg I see no reason why you would not just list it. Otherwise most other guys would very reasonably assume you are poz.

R55 No fool like an old fool.

The lies predate the apps. Back when we used to use the personal ads at the back of the Advocate I traded letters with a guy and then phone numbers. We chatted a few times, and finally decided to meet. We hadn't traded pictures, so we gave each other descriptions. He said: "I'm pretty tall, and fit because I work out four or five times a week at the gym. I'm Belgian." Lo and behold, I was approached by a very short, very fat, black guy with a recognizable voice. I said I didn't recognize him from his description, and he became defensive. He DID work our four or five times a week -only he just started last week. And he WAS born in Belgium -his father was stationed there in the army... You can "identify" however you wish -but when you give your description so that someone can pick you out of a crowd you need to be a bit more objective.

Apps have ruined the gay community.

No, they haven't

I'm with R64. Since we started connecting online, we've stopped connecting in person. Gay bars and clubs are shutting down left and right. Between the apps and greater general social acceptance they aren't needed so much. There are very few gay spaces left. (One reason I love gay cruises.)

He was 37 and a handsome black fit gentleman, top and well hung, and his address was 1185 Park Avenue. I was impressed. When I arrived he was 50, dumpy, and some kind of super living in a dark tiny 2 room basement apartment with only one small window, that received a sliver of light through a shaft going up to the interior courtyard. He had not lied about his humungous dick so it was a good time.

I don't think apps have ruined the community anymore than websites like A4A and Manhunt did back in the early aughts.

Apps just made everyone more impatient. Both straight and gay.

[quote][R54], sorry but that is a weird mentality to have about listing hiv status (which is fundamentally an “either / or” thing) on a Grindr profile - if you are indeed neg I see no reason why you would not just list it. Otherwise most other guys would very reasonably assume you are poz.

I get it and I’m ok with someone passing me over if they think I have HIV. I’m only on scruff, and there is a whole section on sex (preferences, safety practices, HIV status, last time time tested) and I just left the whole thing blank. I could put my status, but I don’t want people who know me through work (which I’ve encountered) knowing I’m a top or a bottom, and it’s all just something I’d rather talk about than post. I don’t think it’s weird necessarily. I’m 50 and my sex life predates the internet and apps, and in the 90’s we had to talk before we had sex and that’s just something I still do even if a guy says he’s negative and on PrEP. And I’m interested in guys my age and assume they’ve had the same experiences and they get that. But maybe not.

I think it’s great that they have the feature and that guys use it, but I also feel like having HIV or not is a medical issue, and should be a personal issue for people to disclose or discuss or publicly share if they want and I’m more comfortable talking to people about that one-on-one instead of broadcasting.

I also don’t have any nudes and never will no matter how many times a guy asks, not even faceless ones.

I like elements of the apps, but not everything. And it’s all optional so I choose not to share my status or sex practices.

Yeah, the more I write, the more I realize my scruff profile and my LinkedIn profile aren’t that different. 🤷🏻

If you have no nudes, no top/bottom status, no hiv status, i'm ot sure how you think you're going to hook up via Gindr or Scruff.

So instead of saying whether you're poz or neg, you just make it incredibly easy for people to assume you're poz, sounds like a winning strategy.

Bi = total bottom

[quote]If you have no nudes, no top/bottom status, no hiv status, i'm ot sure how you think you're going to hook up via Gindr or Scruff.

Well, I do.

[quote]So instead of saying whether you're poz or neg, you just make it incredibly easy for people to assume you're poz, sounds like a winning strategy.

I don’t really have a strategy, but if I did, it would just be to chat with guys and then discuss it privately and then negotiate a hook-up, probably after meeting someplace like a bar or coffee shop first. Which does work.

R26 I always keep lots of Porcelaina and Crest White Strips on hand to avoid that

I love the thousand-word profiles that begin with, “No drama!”

I’m the guy with his dog in every pic.

[quote] I’m the guy with his dog in every pic.

If a guy says in his profile that he has cats, I’ll just message him “send me pics of your cats”. No “hi” just “send cat pics”.

Some guys do. Some guy won’t though!

R74 A lot of guys would never chat with you because your status being blank would set off red flags.

there is at least 1 and probably 2 generations of gay guys who don't give HIV a second thought, gramps.

"Not looking for hookups, just looking for friends" was my favorite back in the day.

When out of town in a hotel I would claim to be a "straight guy looking to experiment with another masculine guy."

Would pull so many hot closeted guys, especially because they knew it was unlikely that they'd run into an out of towner in a hotel in their day to day lives.

[quote]Would pull so many hot closeted guys, especially because they knew it was unlikely that they'd run into an out of towner in a hotel in their day to day lives.

I’ve done similar. So, so many pings at hotels. Once at a hotel, I met not a closeted guy, but an out married, gay, semi-famous actor. Headless torso on an app turned out to be someone I actually had seen on tv! We didn’t hook up, just got a drink. I think in person I wasn’t his type, but I looked at pics of his husband online and was like, damn! I very obviously AM his type. Even though we didn’t hook up he kept messaging me for a couple days.

AND I’M THE GRANDPA WHO DOESN’T LIST HIS HIV STATUS ONLINE.

Am I the only one hoping that R82 is talking about Jesse Tyler Ferguson?

[quote]Am I the only one hoping that [R82] is talking about Jesse Tyler Ferguson?

LOL! Way less famous and I don’t think I’m JTF’s type!

The Gen Z “Gramps” / Descovy-Cures-All troll has returned at r80

And yea; that is pretty retarded to leave off your HIV neg status on a fuck app. Always a red flag for me (unless you’re maybe under 25 like the above whore. But I rarely do whores that young because they usually suck at sex…)

[quote]And yea; that is pretty retarded to leave off your HIV neg status on a fuck app. Always a red flag for me (unless you’re maybe under 25 like the above whore. But I rarely do whores that young because they usually suck at sex…)

You’re exactly the kind of guy I’m trying to avoid. 🤗 so my strategy is working.

R85 You’re totally 100% right! People who leave off their HIV status are playing fucking games. The rest of their profile looks like a fucking encyclopedia and somehow they forget to put their HIV status. Most guys know omitting it means you’re poz.

Ok, I just added it. I’ll see if I get more messages. Probably everyone in my city that has looked at my profiles has already seen that I didn’t have my status listed, so If they’re actually assuming I’m positive, they aren’t going to look again.

I already get TOO much attention, mainly from 24-28 year olds. If it increases though, I’ll probably just take it off.

I’ve been thinking that saying I take PrEP is important and affirming, but it’s like preaching to the choir-all the guys with negative statuses say they’re already on PrEP.

And the other day I counted. I looked at 40 profiles for guys who are 50 (my age, and I stopped after 40 guys because I got bored). Of the 40 guys closest to me, 3 listed that they were positive, 5 listed that they are negative (one with a test from 2019) and 32 had NO status.

Three out of of 40 guys is 7.5%. That’s a really high number. That’s roughly 25 times the rate of people living with HIV in the US and while this was a SUPER scientific and rigorous research project, I have to assume that most of the 32 guys with no status are negative, and that 50 year olds just don’t post this online.

"Vers" guys who prefer to bottom when you ask them what all they enjoy in bed. Bitch, quit the catfishin'! Vers-bttm/Bottom is an option under Position. I call guys out on this, every time, they've misrepresented themselves on their profile. I'm one of those rare *actual* vers guys, who loves to flip. Meeting other truly vers dudes is a goddamn rarity. If you'll lie about something so stupid - which will obviously be discovered - what else will you lie about...?

Top vers = Bottom

Vers = Bottom

Bottom vers = Bottom

R90, not true. I am very much mostly a top, but I reserve the occasional bottoming for guys im dating and select FBs. (Think, 90-95% ish top, 5-10% bttm). I dont like selecting just top now because I feel like that ends up attracting mostly super fem 100% bottoms, which aren’t my type.

(Thus, I select “top vers”)

Hey Dutchie, Howdy from Texas! Cute reply...and yes, often true - but, it works the other way too. I have hooked up with self described Top-Vers guys (same guys for multiple times over many weeks/months), with the hope/expectation of sticking it in them at some point, only to later find out the last time they bottomed was in a relationship in college 15 years ago. Of course, nobody owes anyone any sexual act they're uncomfortable with, but I hate how guys blatantly lie about position to trick guys into talking to them. And then act surprised when they get called out. I'm vers, and very honest about ideal ideal dates being someone to flip with back and forth, 50/50...

I literally had one guy tell me he "identifies" as vers, even though he prefers to bottom 🤦‍♂️

This is TMI even for this thread. I’m dating a guy and recently decided I was going to bottom for the first time in 20 years. But I’ve been seeing a proctologist for an internal hemorrhoid. At the last visit I asked him, so this is going to be a more uncomfortable question for me than for you but how how long do I have to wait until I have sex and is there any possibility there will be bleeding? And he was super cool and said, wait 3 weeks, use lots of lube and be safe and you’ll be fine. Then during the exam, he’s got the alien probe and is looking at the walls inside my butt and as he slides it in, I groaned in pain and he asked “is this something that you’re planning on doing regularly?” And all I could get out between little yelps of pain was “no (ow ow ow!) maybe just once (ow fuck! ow!) but maybe not at all”.

So, I’m just definitely a top.

I saw a guy on Grindr tonight who lists his position not as top or bottom but as "side." Not sure what it means but it sounds intriguing....

R96 It means they don’t fuck.

People on this thread clearly don't believe in vers as a concept. Oh some guy identifying as vers wanted me to fuck him that one time we met up. What a lying, insatiable BOTTOM. Some people really do enjoy both positions. I give strangers the benefit of the doubt because in order to lie to someone you would have to care what they think of you. If someone says vers then they're probably vers.

Has anyone had the unwelcome experience of exploring a self-declared 'HIV negative' hook-up's medicine cabinet and finding an array of anti-viral meds?

If someone gave me so much as a pubic louse, I'd have murder on my mind.

>>>two tons of bear fun

What a great screen name!

Back in the day when online dating was all website based (the most popular one in the UK that everyone was on was called Gaydar) I was always 100% truthful on my profile - you had a series of drop-downs for basic information like age, height, weight, eye colour, hair colour, body hair, body type, dick size, position, and then you had two sections of 'free text' where you could describe yourself in more detail, plus describe what you were looking for. You could also select your interests, both sexually and hobby-wise, from a pre-set list - and of course upload a number of photos, some of which you could designate as 'Adult' so they were hidden from general view unless you unlocked them. Basically long story short there was a lot you could put on the profile, and essentially any very limited profile that barely had information I would immediately be distrustful of and not engage with. Though it was funny to see people who had selected various characteristics on their profile but provided photos that didn't actually represent them - who did they think they were fooling?

I did have one experience with a guy who lied about his age, he was about 5 years older than he claimed he was, but did actually look the age he claimed to be. One guy, he had great photos and looked really hot, when I met him he was still hot but it was obvious the photos were a couple of years out of date. I guess that strategy paid off though because I still fucked him.

How did you know he was 5 years older if he looked the age he claimed?

Because R102 he actually confessed it to me and claimed when he used his 'real' age he got far less 'hits' - I guess because people could filter on age.

Oh, I see.

Thanks, Chap.

R99 I honestly wouldn’t know what brands/labels to look for