Audio of Miss Joan Crawford on the daytime soap opera The Secret Storm

This was a terrible idea.

[quote] daytime soap opera

I was told this was a soap opera. I came here prepared to scrub. I simply get angry at the dirt. Do you call this set clean!?

She was allegedly shitfaced drunk but she doesn't sound it.

How many mothers would take time out of their busy Hollywood schedules to appear on The Secret Storm for an ungrateful child like Christina.

If only we could watch it too, supposedly it is gone forever.

[quote] How many mothers would take time out of their busy Hollywood schedules to appear on The Secret Storm for an ungrateful child like Christina.

Exactly. That magazine ink slinger Barbara ruined a perfectly good choking. Joan had Christina down for the count.

Has any other film star ever been so pathetic as to go back to soaps?

She didn't go back to soaps. She was never on soaps. Plus she filled in for her daughter, she wasn't looking for a career in soaps.

Joan is schnockered in that episode.

R8 its still pretty pathetic.

R7, Julianne Moore, seriously, returned to As the World Turns. It's actually a lovely moment.

Liz Taylor did General Hospital. She was drunk and fucked up the whole time.

Under the circumstances, I gave a valiant performance...

1. Bette Davis conspired with the director to change all my dialog so I had to read my lines from cue cards,

2. Bette spiked my Pepsi cola with Smirnoff 100 proof, and

3. As I tried to read my lines, Bette stood next to the cue card man, lifted her skirt, and farted at me

I was remarkably professional given all of these circumstances...

How humiliating for Christina

The guy playing her fiance was blond hottie Stephen Bolster who went on to play Russ Matthews on Another World.

[quote]How humiliating for Christina

Bette farted at me like some rapid fire machine gun...the noise and stench were overwhelming.

You simply have no idea how vindictive that woman was.

She sounds fine. I can hear her blowing out cigarette smoke, right before her line, "You don't say?"

Oops, sorry, Bolster played Ted Clark on Another World.

I would gladly share more details of this horrendous experience,

but Ryan Murphy has bought the rights to this story for his next Netflix series.

Joan on the Secret Storm.

^ I think she looks believable as a 28 year-old newlywed...

[quote]I think she looks believable as a 28 year-old newlywed...

She was standing in for Tina afterall. Joan had to look the part.

[quote]If only we could watch it too, supposedly it is gone forever.

If a copy ever surfaced, we would have the Gay Zapruder Film.

Joan saved that ungrateful cunt’s job.

Lypsinka should do a show using this audio.

[quote]If a copy ever surfaced, we would have the Gay Zapruder Film.

And the thing is you know there is a copy of it somewhere in somebody's garage or in some old warehouse and no on realizes what they have.

[quote]Has any other film star ever been so pathetic as to go back to soaps?

Ahem.

Here she is on Jerry Lewis' Telethon.

Had she not made the cripple kids clean her dressing room, she might have been asked back.

Tina always blamed me for stunting her acting career, but honestly, her unfortunate features (and her lack of talent and charisma) probably did more to stymie her dreams of stardom.