Signs of Fake Classy

Being on the Real Housewives

Vacationing in Florida

Gold plated everything.

Hiring a professional book curator.

This thread reeks of Trump.

Labels on everything.

A "Salt Life" or "A1A" sticker on the back window of some behemoth SUV with an Alabama plate.

Too much bling

What about a Florida plate?

Tacky McMansion

Not shutting up about your gourmet ice cream during a pandemic news bit about everyone struggling.

Loving classical music and saying John Williams is your favorite composer.

Driving the brand new Mercedes, BMW, Audi, Porsche, Tesla, etc.

The very wealthy drive older cars

Having the last name "Trump"

Thread over!

Smearing your apartment with gold leaf.

Talking about your car. Talking about your home entertainment 'media room'. After being asked strictly out of polite form, what you're doing this weekend, talking about your 'place away from the city' that you and a few of your husband's friends 'you know, his collegues from the law firm where he was just made a partner, and the youngest one at that!', you'll be visiting. And how smart the two of you were to add on an extra bedroom last year to cope with the growing number of guests you'll be hosting.

Attending the Met Ball

Talking about money in any sense in the UK (property, expensive vacations) isn't well regarded.

Never mention your 70" OLED TV, the reaction would be similar to shitting on a Persian rug in the drawing room.

Making videos of your stacks of cash

Concern for upper class manners and behavior.

Big fat gold watches.

R16 I think there is a huge difference between "we have a cabin in the Catskills we like to visit once a month, etc." than "Our 5,000 sq ft mansion in the Catskills that is so popular..."

Gucci.

It only makes you look (more of) a slut.

Of course, no issue if ‘cumdump’ is your job description anyway, and Guccio is the one handing you seven figure endorsements.

Many years ago I had a gal who worked under me who got engaged. She nor her beloved were wealthy by any means at all. She showed up at work one day showing off her engagement ring, a huge round solitaire diamond. This thing was so big Liz Taylor would have been embarrassed to wear it. Of course all that women who she showed it too immediately had expressions on their faces of "bitch are you kidding?". Finally one of the more big mouthed broads in the office said what needed to be said when she saw it. She said "hmmm, it's amazing what they can do with those cubic zirconias", and she turned and walked off. The ring wearer became immediately incense and huffed off back to her office. Interestingly enough she never wore the ring to work again.

OP that’s not even fake classy. It’s just tacky.

Monitoring other people’s wallets. The truly wealthy don’t care and don't need to compete with each other, save for those who grew up with little or have that personality disorder where it’s not enough to be successful, other people must fail. After you’ve accumulated a certain amount of money it doesn’t really matter if someone else has $30M more or $30M less than you.

How vacuous do you have to be to hire a book curator, a la r4?

R4 Why didn't she just buy books she is interested in, read them, and place them on her shelf?

Insisting you can't sleep on sheets with less than a 1200 thread count.

Living in a McMansion and driving a Lexus.

Attending such annual events as the Oil Baron's Ball.

[quote]She said "hmmm, it's amazing what they can do with those cubic zirconias", and she turned and walked off. The ring wearer became immediately incense and huffed off back to her office. Interestingly enough she never wore the ring to work again.

Almost as bad as commenting on someone's lack of class...

R30, actually the Lexus will outlast the latest and greatest Mercedes, BMW, Audi, and Porsche long after they’re all in junkyards.

Using the word classy to describe something.

Commenting on the help.

[quote]actually the Lexus will outlast the latest and greatest Mercedes, BMW, Audi, and Porsche long after they’re all in junkyards.

Found the Lexus driver.

Screaming when the proles finally burn you alive.

Love this thread. The book curator story is the most pretentious, trying to look rich and “cultured.”

My bougey sister hired a decorator to arrange her books etc. This idiot decorator had the “palette plan,” told my sister she needed to rid herself of the original book jackets.

My sis so regretted this ….. I unintentionally made her feel worse when I asked , why didn’t she take the book jackets off and set them aside.

Impulsive

A Peanuts wallet (but it’s Coach!), cartoon character tattoos, white crocs.

Reading DL "royal" threads frantically for clues about how they live, dress, eat, fuck and cry in on their yachts, mansions and designer clothing.

Then arguing about the personality traits of "royal" people you will never meet.

R24, not knowing that the diamond market and its prices are thoroughly manipulated by De Beers et al.

R36 nope I have the Mercedes that’s in the shop all the time. I’ll be getting a Toyota next.

Paris said Kim's ass was like cottage cheese in a garbage bag.

Awarding M

I once met someone who said they hate seeing mismatched books on bookshelves, and that if someone couldn’t afford custom binding their books, they should just turn them around to create a classier look.

Brand name obsession.

Oops I posted r43 in the wrong thread but funny that it kind of fits

Talking about movies like they are art.

Seemed on point to me r48

Egregious grammar errors resulting from a desire to sound cultured, à la "It was a shock to my husband and I."

Related Thread

Looking down on crack

Gaping poosey crater.

Not believing that any film qualifies as "art".

🤷🏻‍♂️

I got news, OP. There haven’t been any classy rich people for several generations. Rich guys don’t wear scuffed up old topsiders and try to pass themselves off as humble bumbles anymore

"Country girls" going to Walnut Grove School. Can you imagine? Of all the nerve! Hmph!!!!

Referring to your "craft".

Aping your betters.

Having a sugar daddy

Serving burnt champagne.

You hush now R58

We need to give these gents their fantasies.

[quote] Talking about movies like they are art.

Movies are a form of art. There's more to movies than Marvel characters.

Kim K borrowing Marilyn Monroe’s dress for the MET gala.

That driving old cars thing is 50 years old- at least.

Smart, rich people want to be protected by the latest technology.

Living in Monecitico in a mansion you claim to own but that was paid for by a Russian oligarch. (sorry, couldn't resist)

Only eating organic or non gluten foods despite not being allergic.

And making a fuss about it at restaurants^^

Making a fuss generally in any restaurant, if it's bad don't go back.

Pet peeve, but taking home leftovers is something I've only ever seen in the US.

[quote]white crocs.

So wearing other colors is still classy, then?

The manner in which you hold your knife and fork at the table.

R33 If that's true then why do we see so many Benzs from the 70s 80s and 90s driving around? I've noticed that people who know nothing about cars vastly overestimate the qaulity of the Japanese brands.

Going on cruises. Retiring in Naples, Florida.

Saying you want out of the BRF but then demanding to keep your titles.

Fake tits

Making your husband or fiance buy you biggest diamond ring he can't afford because you think it will make other women jealous

Hiring a color specialist, ( aka the paint clerk at Home Depot). People who bring up $ in every single conversation.

I take home leftovers because wasting food is rude and portions are huge.

Monthly anal bleaching appointments.

Asking to speak to the manager, in poorly spoken French, at the Olive Garden.

Rocking your “real” LV handbag while shopping at the Dollar Tree.

Monogrammed dildos, lube, and gag balls.

Telling everyone that your best friend growing up was African American- yet forgetting to them it was actually a mutt dog you named “blackie” because of its big lips.

being a busybody/not minding your own business.

Always bragging how much your home, clothing, accessories, car, European vacation etc cost. Old money never does this.

The funniest example of a lack of class was overhearing some idiot relative chastise another family member for not having "an island" in the kitchen! "You mean you don't have an island in your kitchen?! How can you live without one?" This same relative brags about their vast collection of designer garbage.

[quote] Monogrammed dildos, lube, and gag balls.

nah cos literally i have been considering getting a custom glass dildo as a belated 30th birthday gift to myself🤣

(in fairness though i want it customised for dual use so it can double as an athame...and im not even rich let alone rich trash...so thats not so bad right...)

Not wiping your cock on the drapes (curtains) after a quick fuck.(to Zuffle)

Buying a house you can’t afford and furnishing it on the plastic.

Giving your children stupid names that will cause them misery when they have to go to school and are exposed to other little bastards.

Going to beautiful, interesting places and staying in the hotel complex. I know someone who went to Gambia and stayed on a sun lounger for a fortnight.

New car every year.

Head to toe designer clothes, no matter how unflattering/gaudy.

Louis Vuitton.

R23 It is so tacky when a girl uses the term cumdump. IT is ugly enough when a man does it, but it is a misogynist expression, because, you know, cumdumps are women and certain gay men with passive role in anal intercourse, who are viewed as women and demeaned by the "real men".

You are a not a stupid girl, you should think about it.

Long fake eyelashes and Elvira tattoo eyebrows .

[quote] It is so tacky when a girl uses the term cumdump.

R88 tackier still to call a grown woman a ‘girl’, and condescendingly police her use of language and tell her what to do.

R90 Now don't be offended. I only meant well. I wanted to point out the misogynists roots of the term.

Because this fags, as Matt Damon would put it, will teach you a lot of ugly words here and I know you are a decent woman.

Who is Scott, R56? Tony Scott? Ridley?

[quote] Now don't be offended. I only meant well

Just commit to the bit, R91/R92 and say, “hush, fragile woman-child, don’t be hysterical.” It’s obvious you wanted to.

[quote] I wanted to point out the misogynist roots of the term.

Don’t you think an adult female might have some considerate first-hand experience and knowledge to do with language weaponised against women? And don’t you think it might be her right to decide how to respond or handle such?

When you’ve experienced verbal abuse since the day you grew breasts, and haven’t had the gay male drag-cosplay privilege of being jocular and high-camp about it all, you learn a thing or two about enduring genuinely threatening calls of ‘slut’, ‘whore’, ‘gash’, ‘crazy bitch’, frigid angry dyke’ etc.

You’re actually right to say that certain words are loaded terms and designed to harm women, and we ought to be selective about our use of them. Still, if a woman wants to pick up the bloody knife and turn it on its user, who are you to stop her? The damage has already been done, the trespass already committed. Taking away womens’ option of retributional recapture is just one more way of saying, “get that bitch a muzzle”.

[quote] I know you are a decent woman.

R92 how could you possibly know that for certain? How should that make a difference to how I’m treated as a human? And why is it germane to this discussion? This is an anonymous board. I could be pure evil, and it wouldn’t make much difference to many of my posts. In fact, this conversation is compelling me to start acting like even more of a bitch (more misogynistic terminology!)

The assumption that I’m “decent” is (excuse my scatological and unladylike language) horseshit, designed to provoke or placate. And now you come to mention it; isn’t Decency itself a euphemistic virtue forced upon females by patriarchy? “Be decent, be a nice girl, be obedient helpful and loyal, don’t show skin/don’t tease/don’t lead him on/don’t hurt his feelings/don't talk back/don’t keep saying ‘no’ and bringing him down...”

Food for thot.

No, decency is not a virtue forced upon female by patriarchy. Every honest person will tell you they prefer a decent woman.

But, I am like the Bluebeard, I can smell that you are nice, even though you have a sharp language.

[quote] Every honest person will tell you they prefer a decent woman.

And? So? As a female who has before now been harshly misjudged on the basis of sex, I’ve learned the hard way not to care too much about what most other people think and want of me socially. As long as my small circle of loved ones and my little local community benefit in some way from kindness I do have, I couldn’t care less about the rest. It shouldn’t be the responsibility of every woman to be the caretakers and empathisers of the planet, while men continue to rampage carelessly and destroy everything with their hatred. I’m not wasting my energy and what light their is in my heart on cleaning up after men, or on sparing their delicate emotions.

[quote] But, I am like the Bluebeard, I can smell that you are nice, even though you have a sharp language.

‘Sharp tongue’ is another misogynist classic, albeit a bit of an old chestnut by now. Well done, clever little semantic trick. It might have worked on someone less jaded.

And the Bluebeard reference is creepy as fuck. Absolute delight, you are, lad..

My family is very wealthy. All of them are local white trash

I worked with a disgusting man who called his wife, "the sperm bank."

At the end of one Friday workday, some of us were going to the Village for dinner. We asked him to join us. He said with a straight face, "The sperm bank and I have theater tickets." The group of us going to dinner were straight and gay, men and women.

What a piece of shit this jerk was. A total douchebag. His wife was a nice woman, cute and funny. We always hung out with her at the company Christmas parties. To speak in such terms about a partner is pretty damn vile. This guy was ugly and obnoxious. Hope his wife got wise and dumped him.

$20,000 sunglasses?

R99 $25,000 you poor!

Pearl, slimline phones.

Anything Balenciaga

R98 I still believe it is more common for gay men to call their sexual partners cumdump than straight men. As I said on some other threads it seems that straight men got civilized and started to show some basic respect towards women at least they are pretending to be for the fear of backlash. Ok, except black rappers who can get away with calling women bitches, but they are exempted from rules.

While some gay men are treating the bottoms worse than some redneck bully treats his woman.

Why do some men have this need to treat the person they're fucking like shit? I don't get it. I only adore my bottoms.

R103 because we are grown ass men who don't need to be treated like women. When it comes to sex we sometimes, as men, love using aggressively charged words towards each other to get our dicks extra hard.

I didn't mean the dirty talk in bed R105. I meant the real issue of bottom shaming and lack of respect in gay relations and community.

The living embodiment of this thread:

Y'all stay classy now, ya hear!?

^Dear Lord, who in the world are those people!?

Those are the Siegels of Orlando, FL. Timeshare hucksters and friends of Trump. If you haven't seen The Queen of Versailles (the documentary about them) you must! They really do personify this thread.

^That’s David Siegel?! I hate that fucker. His wife looks like a stupid whore snd those kids are fat snd ugly.

R1 when I first read that I didn't see the "real" and thought...yeah kinda. I've always found housewives kinda trashy, I don't know why. I think it's just the proud dependency on someone else. Like stunted and can't take care of yourself.

Yep, R111. If you really want to vomit, check out their series on Discovery+ about finishing Versailles (which will never be happening, btw). It's called The Queen of Versailles Reigns Again. Jackie makes sure to tell you how much absolutely everything costs!

I'm still scratching my head at how these people have money at the moment... surely nobody has been buying timeshares over the past couple of years.

^I will, thanks. That kid in her lap looks ‘special’. Couldn’t the nanny or someone wiped the damn Spaghrtti-o juice off her mouth?

As an aside, people buy timeshares so they can brag about owning a condo in the mountains or Orlando.

Has the QOV already lost one kid to drugs or am I thinking of someone else? I thought she had a daughter who died.

Yes, their daughter died of an overdose.

Posting culinary 'tips' on Datalounge.

Rugs on carpeted flooring

As a host, having guest towels (all your towels should be guest-worthy).

As a guest, being afraid to use guest towels (they're there to use).

Elaborate apologies for everyday mishaps (the better sort "don't notice" them); and, yes, I'm referring to hiccups, belches, farts and such. The understanding is that [italic] of course [/italic] you didn't intend it, so it's not to be mentioned.

Referring to one's extended family as "my people" ("Dahling, all my people are at Saint-Tropez for the season").

I agree with almost every one of these but R119 is so far off the mark it’s pitiful.

Signs of fake classy:

Being extremely nice and polite to people you consider to be your equals or superiors, but treating anyone who you see as your social inferior like dirt. Nothing says 'I don't have any class' as much as this.

Taking elocution lessons to mask your working class accent, even though it's evident that you're far from upper class. Just speak normally and politely, and try to act naturally.

Things that show that you don't have any class whatsoever:

Being a nouveau riche and sticking your nose up in the air at anyone who isn't wealthy, even though until recently you were in the same position as they are, or beneath them. People who truly are members of the elites regard you as little more than a beast and they will never really accept you, so stop pretending that you're above anybody else, stable boy.

Making a HUGE fuss about going to university, as if it were something wonderful that only a few chosen do. If you do that, you're only evidencing the fact that you are the first one in your family to access higher education, and that is just SO underclass.

Yaking about your expensive holidays and mentioning that you were in a very luxurious hotel, or talking about how you went to a famous restaurant. And let's not even talk about posting these things on social media. If you don't see these things as something ordinary and undeserving of mention, you're just trashy.

Calling things "posh". There is no posh. There is normal, and then there are those people. If you describe things as being posh, you're only showing that you're not part of the U group.

Making homemade New Kids on the Block t-shirts to wear to their concerts.

Dancing with abandon as your fur stole begins shedding hairs all over everybody’s dinner.

Pretending you can afford a certain level of car by leasing it

ALL of the RICH RUSSIAN RIFF RAFF- who became rich by looting the assets of the crumbling Soviet Union back in the early 1990’s.

Insisting, as my aspirant UMC grandmother does, that following football (soccer) as a fan is for lessers and rugby is the superior spectator sport.

It's essentially the same fucking thing, but for the covert and sniffy xenophobia and classism of rugger-Rah culture. Football might be for chavs, but at least it's honestly low-rent. Anyway, the future King and the future Prince of England & Wales are big supporters of the football (Aston Villa fans). So there!

What's with the hand in R116's link?!?! It's one of the first photos of her

Genuinely posh people have beautiful manners, and are polite to everyone. It’s insecure middle class people who are cunts to their staff, sales assistants, waiters etc.

My God, those photos at R116 link. For the funeral of her daughter. Utter and complete trash.

^The daughter probably died of embarrassment.

Using the word "classy".

That isn't true, R128. Truly middle class people are polite to everyone, as they are very conscious of the fact that they are part of the bourgeoisie, even if they are pétits bourgeois. These are people who have been part of the middle classes for several generations, are part of the educated, professional stratum of society and are accustomed to interact with others formally.

The builder, plumber and first-generation managerial class prototypes are the ones who tend to be obnoxiously rude and have a sense of omnipotence about them, because they think that being out of the council estate and owning a house in a passable suburb, makes them part of the landed aristocracy. Also, since their habitus is so poor and they don't know the subtle codes that truly indicate who is and isn't above the underclass, they tend to differentiate themselves from the rest of the uneducated and vulgar by throwing their weight around and being unreasonable, demanding and rude.

People who belong to the middle and upper strata of society (and I mean the ones who really belong, no the well-remunerated handcrafters and the nouveau riches) can afford to be magnanimous and subtly condescending, because they are very much secure of their position and have learned how to intimidate, mock and put social inferiors in their place without making a scene, since they were little. They are exquisitely polite because they are very much aware of the fact that they are in a position of power.

That is why people who aren't "classy" are so easy to identify: their insecurity always rises to the surface in all of its desperate brutishness whenever they are in the presence of true wealth and power, or someone puts their status in doubt, because they know that the only thing that separates them from the vulgar, trashy and ignorant is money, and they have nothing else to validate their position. That is also the reason why it takes families that become wealthy after being in the lower ecchelons of the social scale, to become refined and earn their place in good society - habitus cannot be acquired overnight, but it is a generational patrimony that is transferred upon birth.

Driving a Chevy Cruze

Posting long, tedious replies on Datalounge that don't wind up being funny or illuminating or even satirical. Making us waste our time... this isn't your diary.

R126 Can we do sentences in somewhat approximating English?

I gave up about halfway through your diatribe.

[quote]What's with the hand in [R116]'s link?!?! It's one of the first photos of her

The hand? Her hand looks like the hand of an elderly woman.

Most of the photos in R116's link are inappropriate for a funeral.

The unattractive low-rent mother in a short tight dress taking selfies at a daughter's funeral, the children smiling, the other kids making gang signs and not sure what one of the kids is holding, looks like salt & pepper shakers?! They appear to be some sort of small glass canisters. Probably filled with cocaine!

Disgusting and trashy all around. What horrible people. Money sure doesn't buy class.

R116 In one of those photos, that trashy mother looks like she has carpet burns on her knees.

Eating a Big N Tasty at Pussy’s

[quote] Pet peeve, but taking home leftovers is something I've only ever seen in the US.

That’s because of the portion sizes in US restaurants. Food used to be served on plates. Now it’s served on platters. Worked in a restaurants as a teen and full dinner was shrimp cocktail (everyone got one), appetizer, salad, consommé with noodles, entree & dessert. Using todays portion sizes everyone would be satiated after the soup. But everything was smaller …even the shrimp. They were not jumbo shrimp. The consommé was served in a cup, the salad on 6” dishes. The entree was on a plate, not a platter. You got a piece of cake or a scoop of ice cream for dessert, not a slab.

Oh and there was a relish tray before dinner with celery, carrots, olives, dip and packets of oyster crackers for kids.

The other day I remembered an old-timey thing. All restaurants had a cup of toothpicks. In diners it was at the checkout register. At white tablecloth restaurants the cup was on a little table on the way out.

People brushed teeth twice a day and used toothpicks after meals. Then American dental association came out & demanded people brush their teeth 3 times a day, which was impossible for 90% of the population. And floss manufacturers make a killing. Good old toothpicks are relegated to holding hors de oeuvres together.

Granted, today it would look odd to see and old man digging at his gums with a toothpick or having a toothpick hanging out of the side of his mouth all day, but it was a common sight in olden days of yore, along with the flicking of loose tobacco specks from tongues.

Can we go back to being able to read a previous post when it’s referenced? Like when someone answers a post and designates the post aimed at R382, we used to be able to click R382 and the post would pop up. Why can’t we have that anymore?

Overweight

Obvious cosmetic work- facial or dentistry, especially dentistry.

Displaying a Tom Ford book on your coffee table.

[quote]Can we go back to being able to read a previous post when it’s referenced? Like when someone answers a post and designates the post aimed at [R382], we used to be able to click [R382] and the post would pop up. Why can’t we have that anymore?

Post 382? Are you posting from the future?

btw, you definitely can read a previous post when it's referenced in a response. Try another browser.

Hello possum

Claims they love reading but have only read the Harry Potter series.

People who go out of their way to name drop labels/brands, even when inappropriate/unnecessary. Truly classy people know these things should go without saying.

Name dropping what acquaintances do for work. Because, you know, they know a doctor/venture capitalist, so they must be classy as well.

Styling anything based on an HGTV episode. Frau porn does not equal classy,

Pretending your cunt of a wife is a trained architect, speaks multiple foreign languages and was never photographed nude with her finger sticking up her twat.

Driving a Mercedes Benz yet living in squalor

^ This is Los Angeles, where all the crappy studio apartments overhanging the owners' parking spots beneath/besides them have luxury cars.

My contribution would be critiquing others purchases without actually having experienced them or being able to afford it. I have a down and out friend whose life has gone down hill over the last several years. She's very jealous of people who have more than her (understandably), and she's constantly making snide comments about the possessions and expenditures of other people that have no foundation in reality. One of our mutual friends bought some ungodly expensive bag from Nordstrom and my friend proceeded one evening to go off about how ugly, stupid, tacky, trashy etc. the bag was. I can't say I disagreed with her, as it was obviously a status purchase for the gal. But it irked me that this friend, who has never had realistic access to those types of goods, trashed it without any kind of substantive knowledge of the actual brand or designer goods in general. She also once mocked me for a vacation I took with my family, describing is declassé, despite never having experienced similar travel. My mom has a tendency to do that too. She will mock people for driving cars more expensive than hers, despite having never driven them, even in a test drive.

R152 here, I should add that the friend of mine who makes the negative critiques is doing so from a "that's trashy" mentality. My mother really comes at it more from a "that's waste" perspective (and she's right to a point), but my friend would literally chop off her right tit if it would somehow put some designer bag in her possession or get her on a plane to another country. She basically puts on airs, acting as if everything her wealthier friends do is lowbrow, even when it is actually something quite tasteful.

Persian real estate