Madonna's Films

I liked her in Dick Tracy, amazing that movie got a PG rating considering you can fully see her breasts/nips under a see-through gown she wears in one scene. Other than that all her other films are garbage to me, god awful performances.

She was good in Desperately Seeking Susan, Dick Tracy, A League of Their Own, Dangerous Game and Evita

She has produced a handful of films mostly through Maverick including John Candy's last movie Canadian Bacon, check her IMDB

What movies has Patti Lupone been in? Isn't she the mom in that retard show?

Not good in Dangerous Game and quite bad in Evita, which I walked out of since it was an unbearable performance.

She was lousy in Evita, which is especially sad considering its a 2 1/2 hour music video.

I promise to say Hail Marys until Madonna has a hit movie.

R3 you're in the minority there, but you're entitled to your opinion

Even the director of Dangerous Game, who didn't get along with her as Madonna was funding the film and she was trying to call the shots, praised her performance and then took credit for getting a great performance from her(!) in interviews

The movie itself isn't that good, but she's good in it

The only movies she was good in were movies where she was either playing herself (Desperately Seeking Susan) or just had a supporting role (Dick Tracy, A League of Their Own) because she does not have what it takes to carry a movie. Evita was stupid.

I am a HUGE Madonna fan (and a Patti fan) but yes Patti is right that she is a movie killer. I’m not a Madonna fan that can’t admit when she fucks up because my god she does not belong in movies and is dead behind the eyes as an actress just like Patti said (imo) That being said, unless Truth or Dare doesn’t count, Madonna was probably best in A League of Their Own or Evita. Dick Tracy and Susan she was more or less playing herself.

Shanghai Surprise, Swept Away, Next Best Thing …. Just deplorable

Body of Evidence, also a fucking mess, but at least fun to watch with a group of drunk friends and laugh at.

R5 and she had one in 1990, 1991 (a documentary but the highest grossing documentary of all time at that point), 1992 (in an ensemble), 1996

Plus her 1985 breakthrough film

I stand my ground r9

Was she actually good in "A League of Their Own" -- I think she would have been better without any lines. There wasn't a character there, it was like they forcibly inserted a fictional Madge into it. I could understand liking the film but she could have been cut from the film and there would be no great loss.

R9 they made that joke on Golden Girls, because when that episode "Three On a Couch" originally aired in December 1987, Madonna had just come off two major flops: Shanghai Surprise (1986) and Who's That Girl (1987). Her second and third films, respectively. After the surprise success of Desperately Seeking Susan (1985), her movie career was looking rather grim.

On the other hand, her music career was only getting better. Her third album True Blue (1986) was #1 in several countries worldwide. Who's That Girl soundtrack was also a hit that spawned a #1 single. On top of that, her Who's That Girl World Tour was a smashing success, as well.

R12 It’s remarkable how an artist who is so dynamic and alive in front of the camera for music videos, and on stage, be such a flop in motion pictures.

I guess it's like how some stage actors don't translate well to film, or vice-versa.

I remember when I saw Julia Roberts on Broadway in the play Three Days of Rain. I had always loved her movies and found her charming on screen, so I was looking forward to seeing her perform live. But she just didn't have stage presence. It was puzzling to me at the time.

I love Who’s That Girl. I think it’s hilarious. Truth or Dare was pretty great. Dick Tracy and League of their Own weren’t bad, either.

R6 Cinemadonna didn't like it.

The only ones of these I've actually seen are Desperately Seeking Susan, Evita, and A League of Their Own.

Are any of these actually worth seeing? Is anything in the "so bad it's good" category?

Why doesn't Body of Evidence get more play as camp? "Have you ever seen animals make love?" I love Willem Dafoe and find him quite hot, but he is so wrong to play a Michael Douglas type because he comes off as incredibly sexual and kinky guy already.

Regardless of the actual merits of the film. Evita gave her movie career a much needed second wind. She was taken seriously as an actress in a way she had never been. She was supposed to do Music of the Heart as her follow up, but clashed with Wes Craven so much (as well as demanded numerous script changes) that she left the project. Craven asked Meryl to step in, and she did, earning an oscar nomination for the role

Madonna decides to do The Next Best Thing instead, another movie that supposedly had a great script that Madonna demanded changes be made to (including turning the character into a Yoga Teacher). She gets offended with John Schlesinger tries to give her notes on how to improve her performance that she doesn't speak to him for the filming. Rupert Everett of course sides with her and Schlesinger later calls it the single worst experience he's had directing a movie. The movie bombs and gets execrable reviews.

That pretty much finished Madonna's (and Everett's) Hollywood careers off.

R17, Body of Evidence is a joyless movie. You can feel the desperation of everyone in it—they’re all being forced to pretend that Madonna is a hot femme fatale, and it’s draining the life out of them.

R19 Another thing he charts in these videos is Madonna's growing insecurity over her looks, which reaches its peak in Swept Away.

In Spike Lee's "Girl Six," Madge carries a rare onscreen confidence.

I was born in 1987. As a kid growing up in the 90’s, I had NO idea Madonna was famous for bad movies!

I was obsessed with “Dick Tracey”, I loved Breathless Mahoney and loved the idea she was under that mask the whole time.

And then I loved “A League of Their Own”, I think I saw that in the movie theater and it was another movie I watched religiously.

And then “Evita” came out when I was 9 and I was obsessed with it! I used to reenact the entire movie soundtrack in my bedroom from start to finish!

THEN, now I’m about 10-11 and VH1 starts playing “Desperately Seeking Susan” as their 80’s nostalgia movie.

I really didn’t learn about how bad her movie career was until “Swept Away” when I was 15. I knew about “The Next Best Thing” but they used to play the “American Pie” video on MTV and Vh1 I think I assumed it was a hit even though I had no interest in seeing it.

I know Madonna said the biggest problem she has is how movies are filmed out of sequence. I think that throws her off.

[quote]And then “Evita” came out when I was 9 and I was obsessed with it! I used to reenact the entire movie soundtrack in my bedroom from start to finish!

That's so cute.

Covert Patti LuPone thread. OP starts talking about Madge, then includes some comment PL made. You're so obvious, OP.

[quote]Why doesn't Body of Evidence get more play as camp?

Because for some reason it just isn't.

The whole thing should be fun Basic Instinct or Showgirls... but it just isn't.

Who is this fucking troll that posts a million of these bogus threads every fucking day. I hate you, cunt OP.

So Everett sides with her against the director but then madonna and Everett fall out? What happened? Competing for cock?

OT, Everett claimed to have an affair with Paula Yates but couldn't even get the timeline of the deaths of Hutchence and Yates right in his autobiography

He's either stupid, lazy or narcissistic. The dates are common record ffs

[quote] Who is this fucking troll that posts a million of these bogus threads every fucking day. I hate you, cunt OP.

Just giving the people what they want. Which is not Janet.

She is not now nor will she ever be Janet when it comes to acting talent.

Janbot has arrived!

You're right, Jabba. As bad as Madonna is, she doesn't hold a candle to Janet's horrific acting.

Janet’s acting talent has been well known since she was a child. It’s part of pop culture.

Sure, Gorilla.

Janet, actress supreme.

She’s even good at comedy…

……..

Joel Schumacher directed Janet in these MTV comedy sketches. Apparently, they had a blast.

Yes, Janet playing herself on Will and Grace is really evidence of her unparalleled acting skill...

“Desperately Seeking Susan” is my favorite - and it wasn’t even good acting, or a good movie. It was just a fun movie. I watch it every time it’s on. I should probably stop, because more of the magic wears off every time I do.

But Madonna was sexy and appealing in it.

I guess I’m a harsher critic of Madonna’s acting than most because I hated her performance in Dick Tracy and hated her hammy acting in ALOTO. She was trying to be a scene stealer and just looked like an amateur.

The only Madonna movies I like are DSS and Who’s That Girl? I thought she was adorable and funny in WTG.

I don’t even think that she was that good in EVITA. She’s best in ensemble pieces and in music videos. Small doses, please.

[quote] Why doesn't Body of Evidence get more play as camp?

That scene where she is describing falling into the bushes of strawberries or whatever with Willem Dafoe at the restaurant is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever witnessed in a movie. It's SO bad.

She is excellent in Dangerous Game. And obviously Truth or Dare, Desperately Seeking Susan and A League of their Own

Madonna was the front runner to win for Evita that year. She had won the Golden Globe and was considered a lock to not only get nominated but win the oscar. It was a HUGE shock when she was snubbed. The media reported on it for days afterwards.

[quote]It's SO bad.

Yet somehow just bad-bad, like a cheap TV movie. Never entertaining camp-bad.

I've only seen Evita, Dicky Tracy, and League of Their Own. I thought she was passable in all of them. I thought she'd be a lot better after hearing how good she was in those movies. Still, she wasn't bad. I've watched clips online of most of her other movies and thought she was just awful, even in Desperately Seeking Susan. She always sounds like she's reading lines someone gave her.

I did really like her at the end of the Girl 6 clip R21 posted. She, for once, came across as a real person and character.

I would have enjoyed Desperately Seeking Susan more if Rosanna Arquette wasn't in it. I've never liked her.

Rosanna Arquette is a horrible actress. I've never understood her appeal or the praise heaped on her. I loved when Madonna completely overshadowed her in DSS and got all the praise and press.

I find Madonna's film career fascinating solely for the reason that, for someone who so desperately wanted a film career - and we know Madonna did - she wasn't willing to put in the work or discipline. Which was a surprise considering Madonna was noted for being a hard worker and disciplined in the studio. Whatever worked for her music career never translated to her film career.

The Next Best Thing is her worst film for the reasons r18 points out. Who the fuck is Madonna to ignore a director like Schlesinger? He directed Midnight Cowboy! And tailoring the script so that she could be a yoga teacher when everyone knew at the time Madonna was into yoga was completely narcissistic and ego-driven. The whole film is an ego-driven mess, though Everett just seems as up his own ass as Madonna. Both of them had career comebacks with Evita and My Best Friend's Wedding respectively and fucked up their goodwill because of their egos.

Madonna made no attempts to learn the craft of acting. She just wanted to learn her lines and come on set and simply recite them. This is why her performances are so wooden. You can see her anticipating the next line on her face. She's never fully present in the scene. She never relaxes into a scene. I actually agree that Abel Ferrara should take credit for her performance in Dangerous Game because he wasn't putting up with her bullshit or her ego and made Madonna become a team player and improvise. All the other actors improvised. Of course, Madonna reverted to her tired "Misogynistic" complaint re: Ferrara. But Ferrara was the director and Madonna simply couldn't handle the fact that she wasn't in control. It would kill her to admit that Ferrara got a good performance out of her.

Films are about collaborating, which seems strange to me that Madonna couldn't learn that since, from most accounts, she is collaborative in the studio.

I will admit that I do enjoy her performance in Who's That Girl? Yeah her accent is atrocious but she's somehow charming and has great chemistry with Griffin Dunne.

R50, regarding Dangerous Game, I believe she said "it's a shit film but I'm good in it". Abel Ferrara said he will never forgive her for bashing the film the way she did and he said it was a great example of why she will never be a good actress. She cannot handle others being in control.

The only two I ever enjoyed was Who’s that Girl and Desperately Seeking Susan

I love Truth or Dare but that’s a documentary so I’m not sure if it even counts

Oh my god that Janet scene is ENDLESS.

I'll bet the fact that she squeezed out tears made her feel super proud. But that face is dead to emotion. And her voice was so fake.

Good scene partner though.

Janet never came off as 'street' enough to work in Poetic Justice.

Janet can't fucking act for shit. The ONLY thing she has over Madonna in the acting game is that she is naturally more comfortable on camera. For someone who is photographed as much as she has been and filmed in so many videos and concerts, etc. Madonna is impossibly stiff when acting. It goes beyond acting ability, it's almost a visible awkwardness on camera. I think the more she's acted, the more self-conscious she's gotten about it. She was never going to be able to play anything too far away from who she is, but even roles like Body of Evidence and Swept Away, where she could have easily given at least competent performances, she gets too inside her own head. The ONLY role where she was able to overcome all of this was Evita, and I think that's because it was important to her. She lobbied hard for that role and really wanted to be a success at it. I don't find that to be the case for any of her other movie roles. I think she just wanted to appear in films as be a success without any of the effort needed, kind of like Elvis.

But back to Janet... bitch can't act.

It is interesting that Madonna and Janet are probably the two most revered female artists when it comes to music videos -- maybe Bjork and Beyonce too -- but they are so self-conscious and stiff in their acting. Janet was OK in Poetic Justice but Tupac and Regina King stole the movie from her. Madonna definitely became more self-conscious as time went on, especially regarding her looks. I wonder if how she was filmed on Swept Away and Die Another Day prompted her to get so much plastic surgery. She looked rough in those movies.

She is utterly lacking in any kind of technique. All of her acting performances are like someone singing off key. And when she’s not singing/dancing she has all the charisma of Richard Nixon.

R57, no, what triggered her plastic surgery obsession was getting divorced in her 50s from Guy Ritchie. She always wanted a nuclear family and when he divorced her, I don't think she could really handle it. It's like she's regressed.

R53 it may be a “documentary”, but she is still performing.

[quote]All of her acting performances are like someone singing off key. And when she’s not singing/dancing she has all the charisma of Richard Nixon.

Great analogy. I agree, but why is that?

R61, it's because she can't take direction but she can give it.

^Some actors with little skill can still be watchable if they have enough charm. Melanie Griffith for example. Madonna’s charm is confined to her videos and recordings.

[quote]But back to Janet... bitch can't act.

I beg to differ...

Sorry, Jabba, you're wrong. Like always.

Janet's the better actress.

The Next Best Thing sent John Schlesinger into his grave.

Desperately Seeking Susan is her only good film performance.