Foursomes

a hook up with another couple is nothing. you either like it or you don't, and you might have to try it a few times. . . to be sure or hunt for the right couple.

In establishing more regular fuckbuddies as a couple, you should come up with a social contract and lay out the ground rules and expectations between all the parties involved. Let them know your short term and long term expectations and fears. . . be thorough, yes, it's a bit of a turn off to people but knowing of allergies and potential medical risks beyond the usual std/sti questions can be helpful.

Of course, you don't really need to do all that. Most people jump in and let it play out. . . but as you're asking the question here, maybe adding these extra layers will you give you the illusion of security.

You could also review the numerous films and plays from the 70s on couple swapping.

This will end in murder suicide. The only way to join couples is to be the guest star. The only guest star.

It can be fun. Enjoy it after setting boundaries.

We need ages and waist sizes, please, before we advise.

They all have 30-inch waists, R4. Probably too fat for you.

Once in a while when we are in the mood for something quieter than usual we'll have a foursome.

It's not bad to keep it simple with one other couple occasionally, but it can get boring.

Playing with fire, OP. I speak from observation and participation. I'm not condemning it at all, just be prepared for unintended consequences. Because once it's done, there's no going back and papering over them.

Its more trouble than its worth. This is how it will end up. At least 1 and probably 2 participants out of the 4 will feel angry and or hurt.

Have you thought of children!

start slow. get together with another couple and just jerk off with filthy verbal. Set the limits in advance and then discuss with your partner how you feel after.

Or agree to just one round of oral or something. Point is to create limits and stick to them. What's hot in theory may not be hot in reality and you can't unsee what you've seen in these scenarios. so go slowly. You can always get crazier and piggier as time goes on.

Thanks for the sincere responses. When I say we are considering it, we are both open to the possibility that it might not be the best idea. It was my suggestion, on a whim, and we both agreed it’s theoretically hot but maybe just better as fantasy. We have a great sex life, doing it at least three or four times a week, so this is it to fill a void. It’s just sort of a fun thing we thought about. Though it Sounds like most of you think it’s a slippery slope.

I’d imagine there’s a lot you could do with FOUR PENISES!

Not a good idea. One of the couples will fall in love with one of the other partners. It's like a Threesome, one eventually gets put to the side.

I don't share toothbrush with people. Why should I share shithole?

There is a lot of insecurity there r13. If I don't keep my partner on a tight lease they will run away from me! If that's the case the relationship is already dying.

Bitches who call their spouse "hubby" deserve to be kicked in the cunt bone.

Fix those anger issues and you’ll find your own hubby, R16.

I did one a while back, turned out perfectly. The next night we were all four attended a mutual friend's birthday gathering, and it was kind of hot walking around knowing no one else knew what we did the night before.

I think it takes a pretty clear understanding up front of how to deal with everything - during and after.

I guess I’ll slut shame

It’s not right!

A one off won't be too risky. If it turns into one offs every month, or every 2 weeks, it will be a lot of work and also bring other risks into the relationship and home, besides emotional ones. If it turns into repeat 4-ways with the same couple, something is rotten in Denmark.

OP, curious how old you and your partner are and what city you live in. I'm get the feeling that you guys might be older and have more time on your hands ...maybe retired??

I've done 3 ways which were okay but not great (I was the 3rd). I guess if I was offering advise, I would say don't do it repeatedly with the same person/couple as feelings can develop and I wouldn't do with any friends as it will get out and everyone will know your business....gurl, you know we talk!

I missed my one good chance for a foursome. Around 30 years ago, a friend and I were vacationing with an extended group of friends in P-town. There was an especially hot couple (let's call them David and John) among the group sharing the house. My friend and I were sharing a room and had gone to bed (I'm assuming fairly drunk). A while later, I was awakened by someone kissing my neck, and I realized that David and John had come into our room and crawled in bed with us for an unannounced foursome (at least unannounced to me). In my drunken sleepiness, I just couldn't past the presence of my friend, who I viewed on an extremely close but purely platonic basis, and I just couldn't deal with having sex as a group with him in it. Apparently the couple only played "together", so I couldn't just go off with one or the other of them. So they took my friend to their room, and I slept alone. One of the biggest sexual regrets of my life. Youth is wasted on the young...

Filthy whores!

Well, I suppose you just stayed in the bed while knitting a cute little floral patterned cock cozy, eh Iola Boylin @ R22!

Situations like that always end up badly, unless everyone is into it. Then you have jealousy popping up its ugly head. Be smart and pass on that.

I love people who try to proclaim it never works.

No, plenty of couples out there engage in stuff like this and are doing fine.

It might not work for YOU, which is fine. But please don't pretend other people aren't capable of *gasp* fooling around with other people.

Worked for me and the BF. We were on vacation, so there was no post-fuck drama.

Worked fine (several times) for my partner and me.

What’s the quorum for an orgy?

I've never done a foursome when partnered; however all but one of the threesomes I've been in were fun and worked out well. As long as you and your husband are on the same page everything should be fine.

The secret is to put a lot of planning into your hors d'oeuvres - trust me, they can make or break your sexual experience.

If they're not filling enough, you and your participants don't have the energy and the stamina for really good sex.

If they're too heavy or otherwise poorly chosen, you'll end up with a lot of flatulence and bad breath (no one wants that dear).

Think light and nourishing - cucumber slices with cream cheese and dill, pecan cheese wafers, and other carefully selected and artfully prepared nourishing snacks for you and your guests.

P.S.. Also unless you and your guests are fitness models - keep the lights low

^ Oi, I once served a bean dip with Ranch Doritos scoops - won't make that mistake again...

and all that gas was really dangerous around the candles I had lit for the ambience

What if all 4 are kind of fat, around 60, with average cocks, and all vers bottoms. Will it work?

I had a miserable time watching my bf have sex with anyone else. Don’t need to try that again.

a) he doesn't eat my ass so deeply

b) he doesn't deep throat me with the same passion

c) when was the last time he swallowed my load?

d) wow this guy's fat cock feels so much better up my ass than my husbear's

etc etc etc

Gross. OP, you’re too old and/or boojy for all this.

[quote] I’d imagine there’s a lot you could do with FOUR PENISES!

Why not five?

It’s just better to do it with a couple you don’t socialize with. That can get messy

r26 I'd be inclined to argue with a few of them as well but it's not likely going to change their minds. . . so, you get the luck of the draw.

The areas where people have reservations is often in recognizing their lack of maturity or at the very least, the immaturity of others to be able to handle a very adult situation.

The distrust here is often a cover about their own insecurities of their relationships and that is reason enough as to why they shouldn't do it. . . but since the idea is in the open, they might be better off heading to an erotic touch therapy or intimacy retreat and work on addressing their insecurities with themselves and the root of their fears about their relationships with other couples experiencing the same kind of issues. . . discover if this is a legitimate interest or an alarm going off.

It's quite possible to have a fufilling sex and home life but still feel the need for something more... they may not know what exactly that is or they may just know each other too well to consider exploring new avenues one on one...

Maybe it's merely about aging and needing validfation from another, unbiased, party... to feel attractive, sexy, desired... to which in lieu of a physical encounter, they might explore the virtual, where they can again seek a couple for a mutual show.

Which I'd guess they might desire a couple as means to keep things in check and feel balanced, less like cheating, rather than starting with introducing a third or attending a grand orgy.

Maybe they'd be content with just going to an adult clothing optional/nudist resort or event. . . somewhere with minimal pressures to hook up but the option to let it all hang out and see if the moment ever organically happens.

They could just introduce more sex toys, perhaps invest in a doll or perhaps introducing adaptive sex furniture... even without disabilities -- it might change things up enough without heading too far outside of each other's comfort zones.

Or perhaps they don't rock the boat and just settle for everything as is... distrusting themselves and other people in general. Ignorance is bliss and humanity sucks, so all they have is each other.. should begin preparing for apocalypse, building a bunker and then run into the trouble again when they start making the guest lists on who they'll let survive with them in their shelter/ark.

A foursome is best when no one has any hang ups about their partner having sex with another man.

If everyone is freely enjoying the moment, it can be great. If one partner doesn’t like seeing his partner getting fucked by someone else, it will suck. Forced inhibition ruins the act.

Think about it thoroughly because you'll never be able to unsee and unremember what you're going to see do.

^^ and do*

I know swinging can feel like you’re trying to keep your relationship afloat, but, frankly, I’d rather have drowned. Transforming your intimacy into a pornographic voyeuristic parody is a degradation of what you’ve built as a couple. My advice is to just end it and fuck around as individuals. Swingers are gruesome losers as a general rule. A banquet of genital warts and busted out sphincters.

If you feel like the only thing keeping your relationship together is he hasn't found someone with a bigger dick then the relationship is already over r35.

Man, the insecurity of some of these posts is really getting to me. If a relationship is gonna break that easily it is already broken.

Disaster. In my situation, it became huge drama with a toxic 4-way relationship. If they'd been strangers, it could have been a fun, one-time thing. Did not end well. Ended up staying with my partner for another 15 years, which was a mistake. Wish I'd gotten out then. My current partner and I could probably handle a 4-way with other Eldergays, and might do it someday -- but it would last 5 minutes so that we could play Monopoly or Mahjong for the rest of the evening while talking about our myriad medical conditions and the latest coupons at Safeway. 4-ways are not for the young.

[quote] I know swinging can feel like you’re trying to keep your relationship afloat, but, frankly, I’d rather have drowned.

MARY!

Foursomes are for bridge and golf.

"What if all 4 are kind of fat, around 60, with average cocks, and all vers bottoms. Will it work?"

No. I suggest playing euchre.

Update from OP: husband and I instead tried a threesome with a very charming guy who knew our situation and was very respectful in ever way. But while he was perfectly fine and fit and handsome, we both hated the experience. Turns out the fantasy of sucking a cock while having your own cock sucked just isn’t all that. In fact, we found the sex constraining. Whereas we are usually uninhibited and have pretty wild sex, this was all logistics and foreign bodies and needing to make more room than normal. And while I only did it for about ten seconds, I absolutely hated sucking someone else’s cock (hubby didn’t even try). At the end, we both felt slightly ill.

That all said, I’m glad we did it. We were at the point where we needed to attempt it to know we don’t like it. We now have absolutely no desire. Some things are simply better left to porn.

Absolutely no one will want to have a foursome with you since you use the word "hubby." That word indicates you are repulsively fat, unkempt, usually sweaty.

It's not for everyone r49, given how you were being so anxious over the thought, not surprised you guys didn't like it.

People who enjoy these things, are the type of people who don't freak out about sex. It's just sex.

Well we can’t all be as clearly stable, kind, rational, and as contributive to thoughtful conversation as you, R50.

R49 MARY!

There’s no awkwardness quite like the awkwardness of wordlessly realizing that one person in the other couple (or, God forbid, both!) is way more into only one of you two, leaving the other one out emotionally, physically, or both.

Don’t take low self esteem into something like this.

Well that’s the thing, R51 — we didn’t really care when it was over. Certainly not freaked out. Just kind of like, huh. It just felt like lesser sex than we normally have.

That's because you focused entirely on the mechanics of the encounter. You fucked simply for the sake of fucking. You didn't bother to build chemistry. You ignored the importance of anticipation.

And this is why Monkeypox cases continue to rise across the globe.

If Jack Grealish and some of his teammates would like to have some fun I’m up for it. Have you seen his ass?

Whores. All of them.

OP you sound like bore and I am sure your man is fucking other bottoms behind your fat rolls.

R57 = COVID panic queen, now moving on to Monkeypox. Hasn't had sex since 1979.

That's why Miles and I broke up. The others in our foursomes focused all their attention on me.

I have done it before with casual friends. It was a lot of fun. I would NEVER do it with anybody I actually love. It sounds like drama.