Eldergays: Would you live in an upscale urban retirement community for $20K/month?

Silver Alert ending in a swan dive from a rooftop pool? Good luck, boomer.

No. Price tag aside, why would I want to live surrounded entirely by people of my own age.

It calls to mind the failed efforts of parents to introduce me to the offspring of their acquaintances, "They have a child about your age - you'll like them!"

No. You'll be surrounded by uptight straights, keeping up with the Joneses at their level, and listening to them ad naseum about their grandkids.

For 240k a year you could do so much.

And save a lot too.

Fucking Boomers.

[quote] Baby boomers aren’t going to tolerate…

Now there’s a ducking surprise.

OP, I haven’t had a minute to read the prospectus.

Can you tell me, Love, does it come with a revolving cast of rentboys included?

So the boomers weren't satisfied with driving the housing crisis and 2008 recession by living beyond their means so now they're going to finish the job on the economy with their old people homes?

Seems legit.

What, r2, you don't like the idea of old people play dates? We do that with my grandparents all the time.

[quote]Some developers are looking at converting unused office buildings and hotels, [bold]options increased by pandemic vacancies.[/bold]

So, a bunch of small businesses are crushed and as a result, multi-million dollar real estate development corporations can benefit from the carnage for peanuts. Yeah, that sounds like a project boomers can get behind.

[quote] So the boomers weren't satisfied with driving the housing crisis and 2008 recession by living beyond their means

Wait. You think that was boomers? BWA HA HA HA.

You’re insane. By 2008 Boomers already had their homes for a long time.

I'm talking about the 2021-2022 housing crisis (shortage) for which boomers are, indeed, largely to blame. If I was talking about the 2008 housing crisis I would've worded it as "2008 housing crisis and recession."

That said...

No way! Who could afford that?? If the income inequality in this country continues, the only thing the rest of us will have to eat will be the rich. And I can’t wait til it happens. 😖

Our elderly can afford to spend $20k a month on digs? That should tell you all you need to know about wealth inequality in this country and who's holding all the cards. All the money will flow back to the hands of a few. It's a closed loop and you ain't in it, Jackson.

It’s weird that it’s priced that high — an eye watering quarter mill a year. People who can afford that can probably afford to live on their own with a live-in attendant.

I have some money although I’m not Daddy Warbucks, but that’s out of my price range.

Well, they have to live somewhere, and it's not like most Boomers' kids and grandkids will want to take them in.

I'm on track for a marginally comfortable retirement, but it's not going to be that I'll never have to budget. I'm don't think I'll be able to swing 20k per month. If I had that sort of money when I retire, I would be interested in living in such a community. Flip side, if I had that much money, I'd have a lot of varying options.

My dad lived in a place like this 7 years ago, His place was $14k a month (I assume much more now with inflation). They had everything in three connected buildings. They would take him to physical therapy, he had personal training, water aerobics, cooking classes, he sang in the choir, movie nights, an amazing coffee shop and bakery, and on and on. They even had rooms to rent when I visited, so I could ‘almost’ stay with him. He was very happy there for a couple of years, before his mind started slipping and he needed to go to a memory care facility (horrible). Yes, they’re expensive, but I assume that most people aren’t staying there for any extended period of time. May as well make your last days enjoyable. He also retired with a $7k a month pension from a blue collar job, which is unheard of these days. The rest came out of his 401k. It put a dent in our inheritance, but we realized that it’s his money.

I'm already at the age these developers are going after and I would have less than zero interest in living in such close proximity with nothing but people my age. If I get to the point I'm unable to take care of my daily needs I have the resources to hire live in help.

“So, a bunch of small businesses are crushed”

Actually, a lot of the office vacancies are because employers have now “let” their employees work from home. Thus the employees are paying their own space and IT and other costs. The employers can then let their office leases go and pocket the money. The suckers working from their kitchen tables at home are subsidizing the corporate expenses of their employers so the employers have record profits.

The costs of long commutes are much higher than a small bump in the electric bill, R19.

The mental costs of working alone in your tiny apartment are not.

I already live in a “vibrant downtown” surrounded by all sorts of people of every age - why would I want to move into the geriatric equivalent of a freshman dorm?

My dad is 89, he’s not completely helpless but he couldn’t live on his own - my mom is a much “younger” 84 and still handles all the day to day quite well in their home. I know I won’t have someone to take care of me like that - if I’m starting to turn into my dad I’ll end it; if I age like my mom I’ll be ok (until my money runs out - at which point I’ll end it). if I make it into my 80s I’m pretty sure I will be making my own exit.

A single, full-time, live-in caregiver starts at about $10,000 per month. One person I know has one, another person (who has since passed away) had 2. That doesn't include one or two (or more) other staff doing maintenance, cooking, cleaning, etc.

Once your physical and/or mental impairments get to a certain level, it is almost impossible to do in-home care, no matter how wealthy you are, and that's that. Lots of stories of wealthy having horrible experiences trying to do the in-home route (usually consisting of family trying to kill them off, either slowly or quickly.)

What's the point of being in an "urban" area when you're entombed in a retirement community? Sounds like it's designed to have everything you need on site so you don't ever have to leave. Those olds aren't running around the city.

To enjoy the benefits, such as they are, the residents would need to be in good health. In which case, why do they need to live in an old people's home.

Not that some support services night not be useful for some potential residents, but it seems better suited for widowed people who find themselves at a loss to look after themselves and stay involved, or people no longer able to get about by driving, or confidently by themselves. Or maybe people who like the idea of living in a landlocked cruise ship, all inclusive.

Most active, independently minded and able older people, though, surely want to look after themselves until they can't do. - at which time they need a facility with more medically oriented care.

I just don't get the idea if a country club with beds having much appeal.

They will move there to maintain their echo chambers. Boomers have never liked or respected anyone younger than them even when they themselves were young.

This utopia already exists, dear OP. It is called The Villages and it is in Florida. Enjoy!

[quote] I know I won’t have someone to take care of me like that - if I’m starting to turn into my dad I’ll end it; if I age like my mom I’ll be ok (until my money runs out - at which point I’ll end it). if I make it into my 80s I’m pretty sure I will be making my own exit.

Well, that's depressing. I've felt the same way, though since I don't, and won't, have children. I don't want to get helplessly old which is why I'm so health conscious, now. My goal is, honestly, to be dead by 40, though. Which is, getting closer...

One of the things I loved about St. Pete was the grand old hotels that were full of old dears in genteel poverty. But they were a few blocks away from everything they could possibly have needed. Pharmacies,doctors,grocery stores ,dept stores,even lovely parks to stroll in .They started closing (and tearing down) all those hotels in the mid to late 80s,and I often wondered where all those people ended up.If they had any real money they wouldnt have been in those hotels to begin with. You would have to be pretty damn wealthy to afford 20 grand a month. On the flip side St. Pete was also full of horrible state run medicaid nursing homes that had many exposes written about them.

But, R27, I thought the article was talking about basically The Villages in vertical form in dense urban areas in big cities. Same concept - all encompassing developments - goods, services, recreation, but while The Villages is built from the ground up and surrounded by The Villages, and includes single family homes among other housing, the developments in the article are surrounded by the city and don't have single family homes.

Yes R30, you are correct.

Perhaps R27 just scanned the headline

I'll be in one of my nieces' or nephews' spare rooms looking at DL all day, giving them my social security checks for payment. Maybe I'll have to do a few chores or babysit or something. That's my plan, anyway.

I don't see the appeal of living in a place surrounded by other old people, especially old people you don't know, watching them die off one by one.

If I were going to spend $20K/month on living expenses, I'd want a change of scenery--somewhere warm in the winter, and then back to the Northeast for summer.

But ask me again when I'm 85

At the point you're ready for this it would be more fun, and cheaper, to just live full time on cruise ships. Which is an actual (weird) thing.

"He also retired with a $7k a month pension from a blue collar job, which is unheard of these days"

Because of boomers. Truly had great benefits and pulled the ladder up behind them.

For $20k/month, people would just hire live in help. The population of people who can afford that is small - but enough to justify the abundance of $10MM+ condos in NYC and LA. Those people don’t want a retirement home.

[quote]At the San Francisco property […] services include meals, housekeeping, concierge services and cultural programming. Related will open a community in New York City’s Hudson Yards this fall, and recently announced similar projects in the downtowns of Santa Clara and Cupertino in California. It expects to have two to three urban projects a year in coming years in large urban centers including New York, Boston, Washington, Chicago and Los Angeles

[…]

[quote]Many developers are counting on what’s dubbed the silver tsunami to begin boosting demand for senior housing by the mid-2020s. The 80-plus population in the United States will roughly triple in 2023 from its 2018 level to around 600,000, according to the U.S. Census Bureau’s International Database. The data show that by 2024 there will be a greater number of older adults than children under age 18, increasing the need for support services.

[quote]Historically, most senior housing was built in suburban locations, and over the past several years, there’s been a recognition that many urban markets are underserved for senior living…

[quote]The higher costs of urban locations have been a barrier to senior-living development. But with the percentage of baby boomers living in cities rising, according to Census Bureau data, developers expect more demand from those wanting to stay. As development costs are generally 30%-40% higher in cities than in suburbs, most of these urban senior-living communities are likely to be luxury residences that appeal to the upper-end private-pay market and wealthier people already living in urban areas…

[quote]“Our residents want to live in New York—they don’t want to live in New Jersey or Long Island,” says Gregory D. Smith, president and CEO of Maplewood Senior Living. “People want to stay where they’ve been for the majority of their lives.”

[quote]Maplewood Senior Living’s Inspīr brand, which has a luxury senior-living community in New York’s Carnegie Hill neighborhood, tentatively plans up to 10 urban senior developments in the next five years, including two to three more in Manhattan, two in Washington, and one apiece in Los Angeles, Seattle, the Miami area and possibly Chicago. It is also considering developing three to five communities in central London

[quote]Among new locations, the company recently signed a deal to develop an Inspīr community at the former Fairfax at Embassy Row in Washington, D.C., a historic hotel that closed in 2021. The plan is to turn it into a senior-living community with award-winning chefs, spa-style wellness and A-list cultural events.

[quote]“Thirty years ago, people looked at senior housing because they didn’t want to burden their families. They needed help with shoveling snow, cutting the grass, health assistance,” says David Freshwater, co-founder and chairman of Watermark Retirement Communities. “Now, seniors are more proactive. They want something more diverse, in terms of race, culture and age and seek the kinds of engagement and cultural experiences urban markets provide.”

I read this and can't help but think of the reported STD rates among seniors which makes me think of the Belcher family visiting Linda's parents at the Senior Swingers retirement community. STD rates are on the rise across the board but the biggest increase reported is people over 60.

Particularly among older adults, the climb in STD rates appears steeper. A recent analysis of patients on athenahealth's network found that patients over age 60 account for the biggest increase of in-office treatments for sexually transmitted infections. The report found that in adults over age 60 diagnosis rates for herpes simplex, gonorrhea, syphilis, hepatitis B, trichomoniasis and chlamydia rose 23 percent between 2014 and 2017. (HIV was not included in this analysis.) That's compared to an 11 percent increase among the entire population over age 13.

Damn, I thought I cut that last paragraph but since it's there it should be in quotes because it came from a December 2018 US News & World Reports article that DataLounge wont allow me to link to.

[quote] They want something more diverse, in terms of race

No they don't.

[quote]They want something more diverse, in terms of race

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!

That statement is laughable. I’ve never heard an old white person who said”you know what this place needs? More black people!”

I suspect that "diversity" means knowing that if they were to take a walk around the block they'd see more of an array of people in NYC or DC than in some random suburb.

Not that they'd actually want to have those people living with them.

Sort of the Zoo effect

When they say diverse, they mean diversity of age and restaurants.

The said very clearly what they meant, R43, "race" is in the quote.

Because Im a "poor" senior I get a downtown studio apartment with all utilities paid including cable., plus a lunch if I want all for the grand total of $600 a month. I'm on the waiting list for a 1 bed in their high rise for for the same only they make you pay 1$10 a month for the cable...who needs a $20K month place at this point???

LOL @ R41 & R42.

[quote]A single, full-time, live-in caregiver starts at about $10,000 per month. That doesn't include one or two (or more) other staff doing maintenance, cooking, cleaning, etc.

I’ve seen Frasier. Doesn’t one person do it all?

[quote] I'd want a change of scenery--somewhere warm in the winter, and then back to the Northeast for summer.

After a certain age, I’d imagine the travel would be hell. Even two hours on a plane.

R47 - Not if you're living in a 23,000 sq. ft. museum. That takes 4. (although you bring in people to clean the artworks) Mark (who used to post here, I think) had 3, and he lived in half that space.

It won't succeed on a large scale. Just spend time in an assisted living facility and you will quickly realize that most people don't know or care where they are. They adhere to strict routines. Meal time is the big thing. Other than that they nap. The facilities try to plan things but few participate and or get bored with it after 30 minutes. This smells like private equity with dollar signs in their eyes. Also, cities is the last place young families want grandma and grandpa to be. Another Covid type situation and it's even more of a disaster and hardship in a city. And lastly, the really rich will ride out their dotage on one of their own houses/estates with a staff they hand pick to serve them.

Will there be a Jimmy Buffet tribute band at the bistro?

Can you imagine the types that could afford $20k a month and move in there?

Nothing would be good enough and you'd hear them talk every damn day about their 'investments' and how they didn't have it easy and pulled themselves up from their bootstraps, blah, blah, blah.

The average senior does not have anywhere near $20K a month to spend.

This is similar to how housing development is right now. No one is building for the middle class or lower income demographic. It is all upper middle class and high end.

Even if you sold a house at $750K (not even counting moving expenses, relator fees, taxes, etc.), that is around 3ish years.

Who is bumping these old threads?

Stop.

Yep, if you're in the target market for one of these communities you can easily afford to hire part or full-time support workers for a lot less than $20K a month and stay in the comfort and familiarity of your own home and community. And no one who lives on a memory care floor is going to give a shit about "gourmet meals" or nearby "entertainment and shopping"!

So much of the marketing for retirement residences is actually targeted at the children of the residents - they project what they assume they would like in a residence on their parents' preferences. Example - my mom lived in two retirement residences. Each one had an indoor pool which looked great in the brochures and videos. Never once saw anyone using it during any of my regular visits there.

Well, I’m thinking of the mother of a friend… she’s in her 80s and has lots of wealth. She’s also in need of some assistance. She doesn’t need nursing care, but she’s oxygen-dependent. She won’t be able to live on her own soon, so unless she moves in with her son, she has no choice.

I know there are at least 4 of these types of expensive senior housing in CC Philly that have been there for years.

My 1 client moved their 94-year-old mom into the memory care part of the building.

I have no desire to isolate myself by age group. I've had older and much older friends since college and still do. Now in my 60s, many of my friends are younger, some much younger. I can't say that I have more in common with people from my own age group than with people older or younger, and I'm not nostalgic so shared cultural references mean next to nothing to me.

Who wants to be surrounded by retired people of the same age and economic strata, dumbing each other down day after day, saying banal things all day, "We're not getting any younger!"? And in an urban setting? I'm already in an urban setting just not one that hosts 20,000 a month for keeping me until the first sign that I might need some increased level of healthcare needs.

There's no point unless some is trying to find "a lifestyle experience" after evidently having lived many decades without a lifestyle.

*that costs 20,000

R58 - I'm with you.

I'd much rather live in a place with several age groups - where the older people are just part of the fabric of the community. It all depends on people's level of ability, but older people could do certain things in the community to help out or participate in.

I've seen shows where there are shared living communes of all age groups in other countries and it looks ideal. There just really aren't those communities here - not that there are tons in other countries either.

Obviously, any elder care would be the responsibilty of that person - not the community. My mom lives in a senior home - and while there are a lot of activities and it's great for her socially, there are a lot of wheelchairs, dementia and people waiting to die along with some very active people. It can be depressing - particularly when your dinner group companions pass away or other people pass on.

Or you see people who were once active slowly decline and decline and get worse.

You're painfully aware you're at the end stage of your life - I just don't want constant daily reminders of it.

20K?! Fuck no. I want to live at home as long as I can. I’m hoping they have something like uber for a la carte skilled nursing tasks by the time I ever need them. I’ve thought it would be nice to live with maybe a roommate or a few and share a home health aid if it comes down to it.

A friend of mine's MIL recently moved into one of these developments.

MIL is Italian and a fantastic cook. MIL is also a major cunt, especially regarding the food she eats in restaurants and the poor waiters and waitresses who wait on her in them.

Surprisingly, she loves the food, loves dining with her neighbors, loves the staff and hasn't used the kitchen in her own unit in the 8 months she's lived there.

Be seeing you!

I'm just not an upscale person. It requires too much work.

What nobody talks about these communities - or any communities - is the Peyton Place/high school environment that always happens.

Gossip, the popular crowd, self-appointed head bitches in charge, affairs, jealousies, people feeling left out (and some are on purpose, unless you follow the Queen Bee's rules), people who refuse to follow rules, etc.

I know there are some gay and lesbian retirement places, but not that many - I don't know if it's the same thing or not.

You have to prepare for the downsides of any community. But I have to say - I really do think I would want to be in a gay retirement community when the time comes. Straight people are so much fucking drama and they're so mean.

Paywalled.

"Would you live in an upscale urban retirement community for $20K/month?"

They would have to pay me more than that.