Do yourself a favor and cook this for your dinner

Perhaos the recipe IS worth making, but I'll never know because I refuse to watch that channel. I detest that guy's vocal cadence with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns.

He lost me at Oyster Sauce. Very hard to get in my neck of the woods.

HE DOES NOT DRAIN THE PASTA.

umm...garlic and noodles? some oil? soy?

I HATE the way this guy talks. His upspeak is like nails on a chalkboard.

Looks delicious! Hope to try it sometime.

Very weird pattern of emphasis and pitch.

That is a high sodium nightmare that will probably put all but the healthiest people into heart or kidney failure.

I have never been to this channel before but I totally agree about this guys voice and the way he uses it. I never want to hear it again,

lmao. So many prissy queens here hissing.

He's clearly a Datalounger. He's conserving and using the pasta water.

R10, conserving and using the pasta water must be sanctioned by Muriel. Did he issue a disclamer in his vid? If not his head will be found in a dumpster in São Paulo faster than you can press the mute button. Trust me.

He doesn't have "upspeak" he has "Downspeak".

That vocal cadence and the way he weirdly inflects his words is just IRRITATING AS HELL.

It's like a very bad synthesized voice that has no clue about how words are spaced or how tone is used. It doesn't sound human.

Dear god, what the fuck is wrong with the way that guy talks?!?

The oblig-EEE-a-tory SHAKE of cayenne.

Thank you, R12, I actually wondered if that was a computer-generated voice. The spacing and cadence are too regular.

haha

He edits his videos himself and often splices in audio for clarity-- he has said before something to the effect of every sentence has been altered some way to cut out errors or add relevant details. Also I think he said he has to change his infections some so it doesn't sound too flat.

Ewww Carbs

Agreeing with most other commenters and wishing the guy in the video a quick death in a grease fire.

Reading here on the thread that his peculiar cadence/emphases are the result of editing makes me somehow a little more forgiving of it. The recipe looks good, and I may attempt it (I'll need Duck Sauce and Fish Sauce, the only two ingredients I don't have on hand). Glancing at the thumbnails of his other videos, he seems to have an interesting repertoire to choose from. It might be worth it to try to get used to the speech peculiarities.

He has a wonderful sense of humor - very Dataloungey - as in this video I selected at random (link below):

He's very good at explaining what he's doing and why. I'm not sure I'll follow his take on this recipe, since I have my own ideas about meatloaf and am very set in my ways - but I appreciate his style; very informative, and funny.

Why the hell does he call them "San Francisco Style" noodles?

BUMP

I hope the OP does not have a family history of stomach cancer because my wishes have a tendency to come true when genetics are on my side.

People who do not know how to cook is one thing. People who treat garbage "found" recipes as something excitingly new is another.

But a Frau-with-a-penis or a standard Frau using the word "y*m" deserves to be fed through one hole in her gut, with another inserted to remove what's left of the atrocity.

r23 You are such a cruel meanie. Jesus.

Of course Datalounge hates beloved internet celebrity icon Chef John, he has fun and doesn't take himself seriously.

We had a guy on here about 2 days ago posting repeatedly about how he jerked off while thinking about boiling babies alive and that got a fraction of the hate that you guys are lobbing at the Food Wishes guy.

For r21:

[quote]These deceivingly simple, yet devastatingly delicious garlic noodles were invented back in the '70s at a restaurant in San Francisco called Thanh Long. Usually served with roasted Dungeness crab, the recipe is a very closely guarded family secret, but after lots of investigation, and even more experimentation, I think this is very close.

I’m buying oyster sauce now.

Thanks R26!

r27 buy this

Love Chef John. I'd give him the ole tapa-tapa.

Yeah, I hate the way this guy talks. If he, himself, is editing the videos, that's not an excuse. In fact, that gives him less of an excuse for that cadence, downspeak, or whatever. He must think it's cute or catchy. To some people, it obviously is cute.

Also, I hate the way he cuts into whatever dish he just finished. Like a slob with the side of a fork. He should use a knife so that you can see a clean cross-section of whatever the hell he took the time to make.

This is a poor copycat version of the An family's garlic noodles. I've tried a bunch of these recipes with varying degrees of success. I still haven't found an exact duplicate.

No to Worcestershire sauce, sesame oil and ground cayenne. Yes to oyster sauce, fish sauce and Maggi sauce (which he omitted). Soy sauce is unnecessary, but won't ruin it. I also think Chef John may be wrong about not adding a bit of sweetener, either from mirin or sugar.

Most recipes call for even more butter and for cooking the garlic longer (but at a very low temp).

It should be made with fresh Chinese-style noodles, but linguine or spaghetti is an OK substitution. If you add baking soda to the cooking water, you can turn Italian pasta into mock Asian noodles (1 T per quart of water). Not as good as the real deal, but better than plain spaghetti.

R32, have you tried a little bit of fish sauce? Also, what about fresh ramen noodles, e.g., the "Sun" brand? I like spaghetti, but I can't see it being a great substitute for mein-type noodles.

Why are people trashing Chef John? That is simply not done.

Why do people say Fish sauce smells bad. I LOVE the umami smelliness of it.

Worcestershire sauce is made of fish, but IMO tastes way different than Thai fish sauce.

R33, yes, I use Three Crabs brand fish sauce, Maggi sauce, Lee Kum Kee premium oyster sauce (worth the couple bucks over "non-premium"). Fresh or frozen ramen noodles would be fine if you can't get fresh lo mein/chow mein.

I use freshly grated parm-reggiano; pecorino romano is too salty and the pre-shredded parm doesn't melt properly.

I can't believe they now charge $22.00 for an order of these garlic noodles at Crustacean in Beverly Hills! Especially since they are really just a side dish.

From Chef John, I recommend this recipe....do it now because it's way too hearty for spring summer and has to be eaten at the dead of winter on the coldest night of the year.

And I am sure more authentic recipes for it exist elsewhere, but this is the one I tried and it was amazing.

Fantastic, it's high time The Great Gildersleeve got his own cooking show. And as always...

OP, I have made those noodles and they are very good.

I make Chef John's Korean Street Toast often, it's addictive. I'm lazy and buy pre-shredded angel hair cabbage/coleslaw and pre-cut carrot matchsticks.

Years ago I needed a rough idea of how to make etoufée and CJ had the most accessible method that I found.

At first I was put off by his voice and didn't finish the video, but ultimately I ended up crawling back and watching the whole thing about three times before completing my recipe.

Fast forward to now, I reference his methods and recipes often. As R20 says, he has a good sense of humor. Another thing about him is that when the recipe doesn't go well, he says as much; he doesn't fake an orgasm when biting into a mediocre dish that took an hour and a half to make.

There are a million other cooks who make 'sexy' cooking videos to R31s specifications--those are for people who don't actually cook but watch cooking videos for entertainment as they slurp down their Panera and jerk off to themselves correcting peoples' mispronunciations of ingredients they themselves will never even see in their real life in Salina, KS.

r41 Well said.

jesus, who gives a shit?

he's making noodles.

I can't do fish sauce. Oyster sauce is fine but not fish sauce. Should I split the difference between more worcestshire sauce and oyster sauce?

I doubt the credibility of anyone that describes food as "Yum". Moron speak.

Myself I bought a big bottle of fish sauce to try for the first times a few months ago and I have nearly finished it, I cannot stop putting it on nearly everything. It's umami in a bottle, 10000 times better than soy sauce or salt.

Yum isn't quite as bad as "yummy", "yummo", or (fucking kill me) "nomnomnom."

I can see the Funko POP doll collection and smell the greasy hair through my phone when I read "NOMNOMNOM!"

....

Or the overuse of the word "umami".

I love Chef John and none of you bitches can stop me! His recipes are also excellent - so there!

r50 me too

Chef John was already on the internet on Allrecipes back in the late 1990s when I started teaching myself how to cook, so I've followed him for years. He's well known enough that he can get away with saying this is a copycat of the Thahn Long recipe, while other blogs have to say "SF Crustacean Restaurant" or even "You Know Who."

The Worcestershire is used to replace the Maggi sauce, combine Worcestershire and soy and you get a halfway decent replacement.

Add some advocates and you have puttanesca.

I tried this. Its pretty good. But i drained my pasta!

Thanks OP. This will be one my quick fix meals I'm thinking

Is Oyster sauce made with oysters?

r55 yes

Fish sauce, oyster sauce, soy sauce all keep at room temp.

Anything and everything Maggi can be found at a decent Indian store if you happen to live near one and wish to go the Maggi route.

This looks really good, but I can't believe someone hasn't worked with him on his voice overs.

Where's his accent from?

Weird fat straight guy country?

R59 his 4 million subscribers don't seem to mind

I'd seen this video before it was posted here and had already planned to make this, which I finally did tonight, and it is absolutely disgusting. I was already not sure about mixing Asian sauces with grated Parmesan and my gut instinct was right, it was gross. Definitely one of those old 1970s recipes that people don't make very often these days for a reason.

r63 You, sir, are a certified idiot.

R32 The An family noodles served with the crab are fucking disgusting and loaded with sugar.

Taking the sugar out is the best thing this hack with the annoying voice can do.

R64 saw me mention on another thread that we have people who go out of their way to try to start fights, and thought he'd try it for himself.

you could just be a paranoid idiot.

If you want to hear his "regular" voice, check one of his earlier videos (this one is 15 years old). Pushing the cayenne even back then.

His normal voice is much less annoying.