Do you dye your hair ?

My dime store dye adds to the shady character you all love.

OP, how old are you? I can understand wanting to color it if you went gray early in life.

I use a Demi Permanent on just the new growth. Fades and everything kinda blends together. And it's long, so it actually looks really good!

Dye jobs are too high maintenance and the chemicals give you cancer. Wear a bright bouffant wig and change the colors weekly so you don't get bored.

Use this L’Oréal Root Touch Up. Just set it and forget it.

This also comes in a pen form. It’s like a marker that you can draw on your head.

The obvious dye jobs are usually box dye.

Don’t go to CVS or Walgreens, go to a beauty supply store that sells retail (and not salon only) and get real hair dye they use in salons where you have to mix it with developer. Clairol Soy 4plex is an example that is available to the public.

An alternative would be a rinse / shampoo that gradually deposits and maintains color like Tressa Watercolors. There’s also Roux’s Fancifull.

OP? Colour your hair if you want but don’t invest anything in what other people might think and be prepared to say, “Yes, I colour my hair.”

The idea that you do so as a kind of deception, to hide your insecurities or whatever, is dumb. Just do it if you want and do it well. If it looks good, people will like it. If you own it, it’s even better.

I’m so tired of these people who get tons of plastic surgery but then deny it like the rest of us don’t have eyes and aren’t allowed to acknowledge it. It’s not the 1970s anymore.

Obvious or not, do what you want. Just own it.

Less is best Subtle and no one will ever know

Stop kidding yourself. EVERYONE knows. It’s fine.

I used to get my hairdresser sister to dye my hair (she’s very highly skilled, and has travelled to NYC, etc, for lessons)… I don’t really give a shit about my hair, but tonight I tried to buy the usual root dye: IT WAS $18 when a couple of weeks ago it was $10!! MARY!!!

(I think I’ll just grow it out my greys at this point)

I was balding pretty early on. By age 34 I conceded and went cue-ball up top. I do still have a full beard which I started to dye. Like many people, I developed a sensitivity to one of the chemicals in most dyes: it caused terrible chapping on my lips and an itchy rash under my hair. So now at 39 I've given up dying and am salt & pepper now on the beard. The years of intense work stress during covid really made me gray rapidly, I think. I've gotten mixed responses as I'm seeing people that I haven't seen since before the pandemic. All unsolicited comments. Some have said, "thank god you stopped with that fake-looking dye job." Others have said, "wow, you really went gray." I do feel like it's really made me look older. Debating losing the beard, but the boyfriend has a thing for it.

If dark blond suits your complexion it won't look too bad. But go for darker brown or black and it'll look like you dumped your head in a bucket of paint.

Highlights and lowlights with a bit of grey works great.

What hair?

I started getting grey in college and started coloring my hair in my 20s. It was a pain in the ass. When I hit 40, I decided fuck it and started the process to go natural. I’m 50 now, and pretty much totally silver. Yeah, it ages me a bit, but who cares? I don’t care about trying to look younger than I am. Plus, I get compliments all the time on my silver hair—usually from Black women, funnily enough.

Totally gray by 40. I had a dye job for a gay cruise. It completely faded by the end of the week after swimming and the ocean. It did make me look younger, but it’s not worth the maintenance and my friends are finally going gray. I’m in the camp of you can always tell and it just looks fake, don’t bother.

Clairol natural instincts is good for those with up to 40% grey. Temporary for 28 shampoos and very subtle-y fades over the month so you don’t have a distinct root line.

Funny thing, I'm well into my 60s, hairy, except for my head, but I've yet to discover a single gray hair anywhere on me

My grandmother lived to 104 with only a few strands of gray

No. I have no grey hair.

The key to not making it look obvious is to go a shade lighter than your natural hair.

I strongly disagree with R7. Box dyes are “real” hair dye and they are pre-measured. If you buy the color and developer separately, you are just adding additional steps and choices (there are different strengths of developer) that you don’t have the knowledge to make. If you decide to go with a full head, full coverage dye, err on the side of too light and too ash-y rather than too dark and too red/brassy when choosing the shade. A full shade lighter (like R21 suggests) or even a shade and a half lighter is probably the best bet.

But I don’t think you want to go with a complete dye job. It’s too high maintenance and on short hair it’s even more difficult to keep it from looking too uniform in color. That’s the real giveaway that it’s dyed. You want whatever the modern version of Grecian formula is. That way you can stop using it (or wean off it) whenever you want without obvious roots.

^ Thanks for the tip, Miss Lindsey...

Has anyone tried Just for Men? Is it a more subtle dye?

I have solid grey hair and would NEVER consider coloring it.

I have R24, it just targets the grays and doesn't look unnatural.

No and I wish guys didn’t do it. Gray hair looks much better than dyed.

I had jet black hair until I turned 50 and then it went salt and pepper.

The main thing about jet black hair is people do think you're much younger. Now that it's salt and pepper, when I use to look "late 30's," now I look "late 40's."

R13 is correct, if it’s darker than your natural color it looks fake (think Tom Selleck who had brown hair when he was younger and now it’s almost black???). I think it’s a good idea to find a colorist if you doubt your skills at doing it yourself at home. I have blond hair which was turning white and have mine colored every other month. I could probably have it done every 90 days but what the hell. My stylist does a great job, no one can tell I have it colored.

[quote] The obvious dye jobs are usually box dye. Don’t go to CVS or Walgreens, go to a beauty supply store that sells retail

Actually, the box (drugstore) dyes are supposed to have more pigment concentration than the professional product. Seems weird, but the box dyes are made for amateurs and are supposed to be more fool-proof, as far as application and coverage and actually coloring your hair.

You can also color it to emphasize that it's been dyed--like a light brown over darker hair

Go to a stylist, at least at first to figure out what would be the best results. They go to school for a reason, a good colorist really knows thing at a very professional level (but I guess it also depends where you live).

@r28, " I use to look "late 30's," now I look "late 40's."

What's wrong with being a good-looking 50?

No, my ginger hair is all natural. I'm in my 40s and have no grey.

No it looks ugly on guys

I agree about getting a lighter shade. I go two shades lighter than my natural hair color. Much less obvious that I'm dying my hair.

I also deliberately leave a little bit grey around the edges. Don't mind people seeing a hint of gray, but don't want more than a hint.

I use color depositing shampoo. A rinse sorta like granny had in a big gray bottle. My hair soaks it up. That JFM shampoo works too, but I'm speaking of something different.

Get RID of gray pubes...gross!

Men who color are vain queens. They announce their horror of getting older to the rest of society while straight guys and all women laugh at ‘em.

^ I'd bet that just as many straight guys dye their hair, bad take, Frau-Karen

💩 💩 💩 💩

[quote]I have [R24], it just targets the grays and doesn't look unnatural.

I agree about Just for Men shampoo. It darkens just enough not to look artificial.

And it seems that most straight men do it themselves, and look terrible.

lots of envious baldies posting.

We all know you’re 80!!

R22 You just explained in the latter part of your paragraph why box dye sucks after defending it.

There’s more control with professional hair dye - mixing is simple. You buy a plastic bottle with a measuring scale and do a 1:1 mixing ratio with 20% developer. It’s not rocket science.

Worst case scenario, you fuck up on it once and then can get it right the next time using a shade down or up or mix an ash or gold / blue / red color whichever gets you to the natural or desired color.

I work for a beauty supply store so this is apart of my job.

It's the most feminizing thing a man can do, short of painting his nails.

Anyone dye their chest and pube hairs?

that jfm shampoo will.

R30 Except they’re not.

Depositing more color is the problem. It’s what creates the “fake” Eddie Munster look.

Like I said, I work for a beauty supply company and when I help on the sales floor with color, I can’t tell you how many people tell me how much money they’ve wasted doing simple dye professionally and they’ve been doing it themselves since Covid and get the same results.

Hairdressing is not hard. They’re not dentists. It’s basic junior high chemistry and all the brands like Clairol spell everything out on the back of the box.

I don’t have a cosmetology license or anything and I GUESSED my grandmother’s formula and now she doesn’t have the Eddie Munster look she had using that box dye.

[quote] I work for a beauty supply store so this is apart of my job.

Exactly. Which is why anyone who DOESN’T should use the box dyes designed for amateurs.

that's why you use the shampoo. get it where you want it. then use it a couple times a week.

You can always tell.

There was a guy I used to work with who used one of those shampoos and as it faded out it was noticeably lighter than his regular dark brown hair, almost a reddish color.

There are a number of (hetero) C-level types that are clients of ours who clearly dye their hair. It's not so much that the dye job is badly done, it's that they are over 70 and don't have a single gray hair. [Cue random DLers explaining that their grandfather didn't have an grey hair well into his 80s.]

And why R28? Do you not know about the meme?

I use JFM Control GX shampoo on my hair and beard about once a week. I like that it just takes the grey color down a notch or two and not an obvious dye job. I use a non-sulfate shampoo and a non-sulfate conditioner in between my Control GX treatments to maintain a longer lasting color.

Miss Fern dyes her hair.

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well, you can dye your head but the gray beard will age you horribly.

I imagine many of the uglies who post here aspire to have features similar to Martin Short if they do not already….

A triple process, yet!

I color my hair and get keratin treatments to tame the frizz (I’m biracial and my natural hair is kind of unruly). I use the ion brand at Sally’s, but have to color every 2-3 weeks, which is a pain.

these people have no idea how gx works. don't buy black when you have blond hair. duh.

but they took the blond color away, so i found the color depositing shampoo. and i'm not all gray. perks up the winter mousey color too. taught school. kids never called me out and you know they would.

For those going for dye, make sure you test it on your arm first. I'm like R12, and had very itchy reaction when I tried on my beard. All permanent dyes, from cheapest to expensive have paraphenylenediamine (PPD), which causes a reaction in some people. You can try henna instead (no PPD), which works okay but eventually tends to turn reddish. You can also use non-permanent dyes (they don't have PPD) like Roux’s Fancifull, as noted by poster above, but it can too easily wipe off your beard if you just touch it, let alone if you get it wet.

It is usually so very obvious that a man has dyed his hair, because the tendency is always to go way too dark. As one ages, ones skin loses pigment and takes on a pale, sometimes almost translucent quality. Accordingly, recreating the dark brown or black colour one may have had as a teenager creates insane amounts of contrast that make the dye job jarringly obvious. Ditto with facial hair.

[quote] Accordingly, recreating the dark brown or black colour one may have had as a teenager creates insane amounts of contrast that make the dye job jarringly obvious.

Is why The Donald dyes hair to look like orangutang monkey. He is old

Control gx

[quote] Is Martin Short's hair dyed? (just saw this in the DM) - if it is, it looks really good.

R55, I'd say yes, it's dyed. Nice color and texture. He's got a good head of hair. His eyebrows look good, too. Bradley Cooper's hair looks good in that photo as well.

Hair is hair so be fine shopping for the ladies' stuff. Lots more options out there, especially in the light shades.

.

I don't dye my hair. It went from a reddish blonde in my twenties to a white silver now I am in my sixties.

Stopped dying my hair when it started fading within two weeks and the continual maintenance was just a pain. Used many products over the years but Just for Men was by far the worst and gave me rashes all over my head. Am now totally grey and much happier than I thought I would be, so embrace it guys.

Keep in good shape and be a silver daddy like Anderson Cooper.

Whenever men over fifty dye their hair, they're usually not fooling anyone. But it's their choice. I just feel that whatever makes them feel better about themselves is what matters.

Try a semi-permanent dye first. If you don't like it, it will just wash away

Not true R61. European salon brands do not have PPD. Example: Goldwell

For those debating box dyes: one of the main issues is that they use a high volume (higher % of peroxide) developer which is only necessary if you're trying to lighten your hair. This can result in odd tones if you're taking brown hair (mixed with grey) and coloring to brown. The high volume developer "lifts" too much color out of the brown, resulting in red-orange tones, then deposits brown pigment. So you might end up with lots of red tones. If you use an ashy color so that you don't get the red tones, you might get odd blue or green tones in what was previously grey. A professional knows how to adjust for all those factors. Once you know the recipe you can just buy the professional products online and do it yourself.

lord, just buy the shampoo.

having nice shoes, clothes that fit, having good body mobility of some sort, those things make an older gentleman look good, not hair color

Tom Cruise does a good job in coloring his hair. It looks pretty natural and not brassy.

I am female and yes, I dye my hair although I don’t have a lot of grey yet.

I think if it will make you feel better, get it dyed. But go to a top notch salon to have it done. Ensure shampoos you use have no sulfates, which wash out the colour.

Grey is notoriously difficult to cover so don’t be disappointed if you don’t have full coverage.

JFM shampoo: At home in the bath, I thought it looked good…subtle.

I then had a work-related group taken. In the photo, my hair had a Nana-like purple hue.

That JFM tube hit the trash can that day, and haven’t touched it since.

The only way I’d color now would be for a job interview, and would use a pro.

Hilarious, R77.

R75, you posted probably one of the most unflattering photos of Tom Cruise, but you're right. His dye job looks natural.

And to add on to what R61 said - After I developed my allergy to Just for Men / PPD, I did try henna. My beard's naturally a medium brown and I tried for a shade lighter. The henna turned me orange (not like traffic cone orange, but definitely an auburn complexion). It was painfully obvious. After that I threw in the towel.

R72 says the european brands don't use PPD. Interesting. At this point though everyone has seen me very gray, going back to dying seems... kind of pathetic.

I use Just for Men dark brown for the hair on my head and for my goatee. I am 60 but have been dying my hair once a month after a haircut for the past 20 or so years.

People who dye their gray hair make me laugh.

For those that dye their hair - honest question - do you think people think it's natural? Honestly?

I'm sure your face makes lots of people laugh R81

R83 Good one!

Yikes! Tom Cruise has sure gotten fugly!

R82 Practically every American woman in her 50s dyes her hair. Do you notice? Hair dye is so prevalent it's come to seem natural.

Id rather wear wigs in many different colors and styles. Maybe keep some for black tie and red carpet events should I ever be invited to any. Others for zoom meets.

[quote] I work for a beauty supply store so this is apart of my job.

Just like Trevor Donovan is apart of the team?

R88. Trevor clearly goes to a pro. His highlights are multi-toned, but sometimes his tanning/sun exposure leaves it brassy an wildly inconsistent.

You’d think queens like him, who post on SM daily, don’t realize that as visitors scroll through, his hair color is radically different dat to day.

R50 Why do you think it’s so dangerous or scary? Lol.

Box dye is bad bad bad bad. It’s bad for your hair. It’s shit quality and it’s not fool proof, it’s unpredictable. And like I said, the colors come out flat.

90 year-old women who are half dead and half blind can mix professional hair dye at home.

It’s not rocket science.

R90 I completely agree. I tried to explain it upthread but apparently nobody reads. At least 1 person (you) gets it.

The important thing to know is that your skin pigment is also getting lighter, albeit more subtle. So when you color your hair go a shade lighter. It will look more natural.

Since we're talking about hair color, my mother just asked me if she should get a wig. She wears her hair shorter, but now she wants to really cut it short, and just use wigs. She is completely gray but she has been coloring her hair for years. She gets it done professionally, but she said it has become so expensive and time consuming she'd rather just chop it all off and get a wig. She wanted my opinion and I told her a cheap wig would look terrible.

R91 Yes!

Clairol and L’Oreal both make professional hair dye for the public. It’s way better to go to a beauty supply store and go where hairdressers get their hair color than to gamble with “Sassy Honey Beige” or “Mocha Tramp” colors at CVS.

[quote] What's wrong with being a good-looking 50?

Why would anyone want to look 50?! LOL. I’ve always looked a good 15 to 20 years younger than my actual age.

Embrace the gray, be a silver fox.

I started going totally gay at around 40. My co-workers didn’t even notice but then again they started getting some too.

R96 You waited until 40 to go gay?

[quote] I’ve always looked a good 15 to 20 years younger than my actual age.

In dog years maybe.

Thanks, R72, I will try Goldwell. It work on beard?

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R100, that’s a wig.

I thought Elton John had hair transplant surgery?

"I started going totally gay at around 40. My co-workers didn’t even notice but then again they started getting some too."

I think it's wonderful that you and your co-workers are over 40 and getting laid! Are you sucking them off and/or presenting hole in the break room?

R102 He did but years ago and it didn't work out well.

a lot of the cheap home hair dyes from loreal and clairol don't give full coverage from a 10 minute application. and they wash out over the next few weeks. people over a certain age look ridiculous when their hair is all one color. Covering some or most of the gray is the most natural look.

We all know what you meant, r96, but I sincerely thank you for making me laugh.

I only dye my perineal hair. I dye it purple.

[quote] Hair dye is so prevalent it's come to seem natural.

Just like collagen injections, right? Whatever you need to tell yourself.

The older you get, the more likely it is you’ll become allergic to dye. A lot of women have said that when they stopped dyeing their hair, their sparse hairline started filling in too. That happened to me as well. My hairline in front was getting pretty thin, but after not dyeing it for about two years, my hairline looks a lot better. Gray does make you look a lot older though, not necessarily bad, but older.

Pretty much the best thing you can do is spend the dye money on a good haircut.

Yes, I knew a woman who used hair dye for years and suddenly one day, the dye caused her whole face to swell up. She had to go to the hospital and be put on steroids

Yes, I dye my hair.

Of course it's all in the box I keep it in.

My hair has sadly begun to dull out in addition to a portion of it going grey.

This saddens me, as my hair color was something I genuinely liked about myself. It was so varied, it had every shade known to humankind in it, and I even found agouti strands in the brush at times.

Now the gold and red are and everything is just flattening out into the color of mud, streaked with white at one temple.

It would be strange to take up Miss Clairol at this point. Guess this is why hats were invented.

color depositing shampoo, r112. not even the jfm.

R7 There's no difference in the box dyes and the dyes used in salons the difference is in a salon you have an experienced colorist who knows how to mix different colors and the knowledge of how and where to apply color for a more natural look. A box dye which you apply yourself at home looks like you poured a bottle of shoe polish on your head.

I just read that control gx can make ya go bald, so just embrace the gray

R96 This small typo makes this hilarious.