Night of the living dead... Joan Collins celebrates her 88th birthday and 20th anniversary

[quote]I loathe linking to the Daily Maul

Yet you obviously read it.

Yes. It's treasure trove of fantastic catasrophe's like the link. A guilty pleasure. Much better than you, R1. You're like a fart.

Is it also a fundraiser to pay for her to take some acting lessons?

Fergie ... YOWCH.

[quote]Look carefully for the photo of certain Datalounger Frederick Forsyth, "who caught the eye in a purple and gold sequinned jacket."

I busted out laughing. Like an 80-year-old queen who's been drinking all day at 11:30 on Mardi Gras night.

[quote]Much better than you, [R1]. You're like a fart.

FABULOUS sense of humour!! along with your hilarious "Daily Maul".

R4, I loved the hint of gut spilling over the waistband.

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

Did Krystle show up?

[quote]Did Krystle show up?

No, but Stephanie Beacham did.

All I can say about her face work is that she certainly must have been thrifty.

I think Beacham looks good.

Why 7,000 photos of Fergie, looking weirder and weirder in each photo.

THE CHAMPAGNE WAS BURNT! - Bill Taylor

Fergie often wears that manly watch with the brown band. It is totally inappropriate for woman’s evening wear.

Simon Cowell certainly hasn’t been in a hurry to marry his best friend’s wife, they’ve been dating for nine years.

Simon LeBon must be hard up for social engagements if he is reduced to octogenarian birthday parties.

Old Joan talked so much shit about England and its lockdowns forcing her to France, why didn’t she have it at the Ritz in Paris?

Have another line, Fergs! And another tumbler of off-the-shelf Polish vodka!

Fergie’s wristwatch bugged me as well.

I think Stephanie Beachum looks great.

Elizabeth Hurley's son looked great when shot directly from the front, but he looked a little off when shot from a side angle.

She actually has some much cooler and attractive friends than this lot. I don't understand what happened. And tons of gays. She's very on the gay train.

Look, I fucking love Dame Joan, and I always will. I remember watching Dynasty with my mom, as a toddler. I thought she was beautiful then and for her age, now, she is pretty spectacular. And, I don't know the real story of her marriage, but I'm glad it seems to work for both of them and that they are happy.

As for the others, I think the Prince Andrew stuff has taken a toll on Fergie. If you compare these pictures to the ones around Eugenie's wedding in 2018, she has aged a lot in the last couple of years.

Other than Simon Cowell, the plastic surgery isn't the worst I've ever seen.

Also, Elizabeth Hurley is a beautiful, beautiful woman. And, now her son is just beautiful. I've always wanted to have sex with her, now I want to have sex with both of them, but not a threesome because that would just be wrong, right?

Frederick Forsyth, never wear shoes lighter than you clothes because the first thing people will look at are your feet.

Sorry I forgot to sign R18

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

It all looks very old-school fun and glamorous. You don't see gowns like that anymore.

Damian looks good. He seems like he has it together in his way. Not fragile. Guess Liz took good care of him, in her way.

The Mail certainly seems to love the "glamorous" Lauren Silverman. She reminds me of Hilaria Baldwin. She must have some charms.

Frederick Forsyth never recovered from dating Miss Dunaway.

Fergie's watch is $7.99 at Family Dollar.

She's 89

Joan looks fantastic for her age.

Because she would've had to drive through the Alma Tunnel to get there, R13.

I never would’ve recognized Stephanie Beacham but she does look good.

Cowell has gone full Mr. Potato Head. (His gf is so pretty, too.)

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

[quote] "Yes. It's treasure trove of fantastic catasrophe's like the link."

Or like this comment.

Yea, cause Liz Hurley has nothing better to do then to push a dildo in some middle aged "bisexual" DLer' s ass.

All those enemas have worked an absolute treat for Fergie. She looks.... RADIANT.

That appears to be Joan's rarely seen real hair in the group shot.

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

There was more Restylane at this birthday party than in the cabinets of a Park Avenue dermatologist.

R34, Percy wore a kilt?

yes, he's half Scottish

Separate bathrooms because at 88 her liquid bowel movements reek.

[quote] because at 88 her liquid bowel movements reek.

Come on. Keep it nice!

What shocked me more than anything is how modestly dressed everyone is, although Liza is doing her boobs thing. I've become so used to seeing partial nudity outfits at Hollywood functions, that it's actually odd to everyone covered up.

"Damian looks horrible here!!! "

Damian has gone full "Damien" the evil child...

One can never go wrong with finger-hooked bat sleeves to hide knobbly old hands. Thank you Miss Beacham!

The biggest surprise is Frederick Forsyth who used to be Mr Cool. Now he looks like a Datalounger!

"[R34], Percy wore a kilt? "

"yes, he's half Scottish "

And filled with scotch, no doubt

Fergie was overheard, "Where's the bar? I heard there's a bar. I was told it be an open bar. I wouldn't have come if it wasn't an open bar"

Good God, look at all that REAL fur. Do these people think it's 1982?

Liz as always trying to outdo everyone—a bright red boob-show dress on an elderly woman’s birthday is not in good form. It’s tough enough being an old woman doing her best to be attractive. Liz just adds insult to injury.

Her son looks like a Keira Knightley/Linda Evangelista combo.

You just know everyone there detests each other. All the way home, "Did you see____? She has some nerve wearing ____ and what about ____ showing her face in public looking like ____"

I hate women wearing black to a celebration party. I think it looks horrible and looks like no thought went into it.

About 10 years ago when the "black" fashion was in full mode (fraus wearing black day and night) I heard about a couple who on their wedding invitation wrote, dress as you like, just don't wear black, it's a wedding not a funeral.

Am I the only one here who wants to gently pull Damian Hurley's long hair while pounding his ass?

R49 Yes, you are.

SABLE!!!

It was shocking seeing Anthony Andrews looking so old. Aging is a bitch.

R49, you're going to have to explain to his mother that the mess all over your hands is his face that peeled off when you pulled his hair.

Joan is 88 and still bringing the glamour in high heels. 👏

"[R49] Yes, you are. "

No, he's not

Lol Babs Amiel and Conman Black, what a deplorable evening. I never knew Frederick Forsyth was a DL fave, married to Joan Crawford or was still alive. Poor Simon LeBon, his little twink arse must have been black and blue from all the pinches from those 80 year old queens all evening.

I'm not R18, but R31, are you familiar with the concept of wanting something we won't ever get? This applies to most things in life, to be honest - world domination, eternal youth, unfathomable wealth, or sex with the Hurleys. Does it mean it's verboten now to even think about it?

"are you familiar with the concept of wanting something we won't ever get?"

Wanting sex with a mother and son is just creepy

Oh, Damien...Still calling yourself a "model"?

I can see why Daddy wasn't a fan. Damien exudes boring bottom energy.

R57 It is, but that didn't stop Rafael Alencar!

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

[quote] Frederick Forsyth, never wear shoes lighter than you clothes because the first thing people will look at are your feet.

In this case R19 that’s a feature, not a bug. Also…it’s not working.

[quote]Folks, this is how one ages naturally.

Please darling, we've barely had breakfast.

I guess Linda Evans' invitation got lost in the mail.

Simon Cowell really thinks he's some kind of stud with his shirt open down to his navel. Ugh.

R40 Liza who?

With a face like Cowell's do you think he looks in the mirror with any doubt? Shame about Stephanie Beacham... she's not Cowell territory but you wish she'd opted for a classic, old school lift rather than DuPont. Barbara Amiel has the face she deserves.

Damien is wearing more makeup than his mum.

Dame Joan is probably pissed that Hurley got the headline. Sorry, Joanie - tits. You DO understand.

Why is she revered in Hollywood? What has she ever done that's memorable, besides look somewhat attractive?

Has someone invited Betty white?

“The Eyes of Simon Cowell”

[post redacted because linking to dailymail.co.uk clearly indicates that the poster is either a troll or an idiot (probably both, honestly.) Our advice is that you just ignore this poster but whatever you do, don't click on any link to this putrid rag.]

Can anyone imagine a happy ending for Damian Hurst? At best, he'll be an elderly gay man living in a dusty flat dominated by youthful sexy pictures of his long-dead mother. At worst, I'm picturing a Savage Grace-type situation.

All Hurley had to do to meet the perfect man is give birth to him.

A walking, talking mirror to escort her around town.

HURLey's son is prettier than she.

*snicker-snak

Did Fergie forget to apply any makeup?

Was Prince Andrew invited?